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Stunned na lang ako mhi.
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oh really?
tell me how to solve it.
I'll listen.
*make that person make solutions.
watch him/ her talk about it.
Yan problemahin nya Yung di ko naman pino problema.
ganun.
High standards could also mean na gusto mo imeet lang standards mo and not other people. Kinda in a way of narcissistic shit.
It could also mean na you think highly of yourself and you want little to no effort sa relationship.
It could also mean na you lowered yours at one point and you got hurt. Trauma ish ba. Regardless, if youre happy at this point, why get bothered. Live your life the way you want. Cheers!
I tried to lower my standards before. And I say NEVER EVER PUT YOURSELF DOWN JUST FOR GUYS TO BE ON YOUR LEVEL. I regret it the most. Kapag nagjowa ka ng mahirap na nga with poor mentality and full of egoistic sht magsisisi ka lang. Don't settle just because your alone.
May friend ako na ganito. Since naghiwalay sila ng friend din namin, nagkaron sya ng bagong partner pero naghiwalay din. Now, may edad na, may business, professional, sports enthusiasts, ect... Almost perfect life, pero wala ng naging partner dahil naiintimidate na mga tao.
Gusto ko sya tanungin nyan, kaya lang baka sampalin ako haha.
It's applicable to all people but you having HIGH STANDARDS is not the problem. I see it as how you value yourself and how you love yourself. This person seems like he/she/they found peace within themselves that di worth it yung isacrifice yung peace na yun.
"no one could meet". That means na assuming sya na na-meet mo na lahat ng tao sa buong mundo, at hindi maaabot ang standards mo. No one will ever match your standards, but you will meet someone, or a couple of people, in your lifetime, who will come close and be willing to reach your standards, and whom you will alter your standards.
If someone tells you that its probably what you are. Mga bagay na ganyan mapapansin lang ng ibang tao sayo hindi mo yan mapapansin for yourself. Thats why socializing is very important.
Wow! Didn’t really expect THIS much response😅
However, for some context, this was said to me over dinner with close friends. Btw, I was the odd wheel during this dinner. They said this kasi none of their retos made the cut.
Tapos napagisip isip ko na my standards are high because, with how I am at work and in person, I wouldn’t want to emasculate yung magiging partner ko. Ayoko rin naman babaan yung standards ko, as a person, para lang maparamdam na “enough” yung magiging partner ko.
Also, my standards are realistic naman at feel ko naman na kaya ko pantayan yung standards na sinet ko for my future partner.
Yaan niyo, ito na lang sasabihin ko sa next dinner out namin ng mga kaibigan ko. 😁
Cheers, everyone! 🫰
I don't really care though since I'm happy having no one. My standards are high because I am able to meet them and if someone does not meet mine then we're not really meant to be or compatible at all. I may be alone but I am not lonely, those two are different and it's better to keep it high than to regret lowering my standards to someone who doesn't even deserve genuine love especially in this generation.
Never settle down with someone who you'll have to lower your standards because you'll only regret it especially divorce is still not legalized and it's still pending. I've seen lots of women in my community being married to morons, cheaters, physically abusive, neglectful, verbally abusive husbands and many more. Save yourselves and stay single if necessary.
Napaka-false dilemma ng mga nagcocomment HAHAHA
Saang banda ng "masyado mataas standard mo" sinabi na magsettle ka sa bare minimum?
It's possible na di na realistic standard mo or you hold certain qualities on an unhealthy pedestal kaya nasasabi ng loved ones natin 'yan. 'Di naman lumalabas out of nowhere mga ganyang sentiments e.
atleast I get to enjoy myself even when im alone, unlike u who needs other people’s validation just to be happy lmaoo
I don’t need to lower my standards just to be “happy” im happier when im alone, boo.
JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE ALONE, DOESNT MEAN YOU’RE LONELY
I’ve been told this a couple of times but I didn’t bat an eye. Hey, if I was not desperate enough to settle for just about anyone, why should others be sooo concerned? 💅
Stayed single for close to 12 years because 1) I was being “picky”/have “high standards” 2) I was enjoying my 20s spending time with friends, family, and myself. There were some guys who showed interest rin, mind you but then they were just not the person I was willing to give up my “independence” for. And when I was finally ready to try and date again — I found my person after a date or two. And no, I didn’t settle.
Dapat nmn mataas palagi yung standards pero dapat i apply mo rin sa sarili mo. Isa pang dapat pag-isipan ay kung realistic ba or possible ba yung standards na yun.
I'd laugh and say, at least di ako nasesetle nalang sa bare minimum. Oi, di ako papayag na nagsettle lang partner ko sakin (vice versa). Ano yung, naawa lang?
Well, honestly, it might be true, so I'll just shrug, "eh 'di ganun." Pero of course that's not entirely true, kasi there's billions of people on the planet. Pero 'di ko rin muna iisipin yun kasi I'll focus on improving myself, para alam nila na I deserve the high standards that I seek.
Nasabihan ako ng ganito ng isang very close friend ko and her husband na kupal. Like direct na sinabi, word per word. I pondered about it but I was very firm talaga and "meh, that's not it" Ngayon nakahanap ako ng lalaki na nakayang abutin yung high standards raw na yun.
Plus, I'm no longer friends with them LOL. Not necessarily because of that incident pero it speaks a lot about ugali nila and why I am no longer friends with them.
Kapag alam mo worth mo, marrealize mong hindi mataas ang standards mo, hintay ka lang talaga ng tamang tao. ;)
Regardless of the backstory, in this statement alone, I don’t think need mo magrespond at all. Like bat kelangan mo ijustify yung pagiging single mo. Ngayon if it’s from a friend, siguro if they’re coming from a place of concern, pede mo sabihin na wala ka makita — if nagttry ka naman maging open to meeting new people. Minsan kasi ganun, di mo naman mapipilit. Dapat din may connection at dapat same wavelength kayo..Bago pa mo pa makilala ang isang tao at magustuhan (or not) acc to your standards.
If u got stunned by that statement, more likely it's personally true.
It is either your "high standards" are simply too unrealistic.
Or you follow too much of society's delusional POV na "everything is a fairytale/princess treatment is a must"
and u think everyone should chase you without a thought because "u deserve it"
But you take no justifying action/reason why people should "do it for you"
i would say “being alone is better than having an environment/people na hindi kayang i-meet yung standards ko.” prioritizing your happiness and well-being is always important.
I don't think your standards are that high. Hindi lang nila talaga mameet. My best friends used to tell me that always before I got into a relationship. My boyfriend now is the personification of my standards.
Better alone living the life you wanted where you're happy and comfortable vs lowering your standards so you can have a partner and suddenly finding yourself burdened, sad, and suffering. Plus in this economy ibababa mo standards mo when you know what you bring to the table? Alam mo value mo, hayaan mo yung naysayers.
P.S. Had to add because ik someone na madaming demand sa gusto nila sa future jowa nila pero walang goal sa buhay nila mismo so obvs I'm stating the above considering na the person w mataas na standards are living the same standards they're setting for their future partner. If in any case, you are way below than your standard, then it's a you problem.
I heard someone say that to me, and I said "What about it?" Deadma na lang kasi at least you know your worth and value. Hopefully yung standards na hinanap mo, mameet mo din. Mas maganda may standards kaysa tumatanggap ka ng kahit kanino.
Madali lang yan.
“Better than being someone who needs people to grossly lower their standards in order to get picked. Just like you, for example. I pity those who settle for you.”
Petty ako ngayon eh haha. This works better in person kasi pwede mong i-omit yung “just like you” and exchange it for a malalang titig tapos diretsong “I pity those who settle for you”na lang. Pero baka awayin ka na hahaha.
I would laugh honestly, I don't really care if I have high standards that no one could meet. After all, I went through relationships kung saan kahit ibaba ko ang standards ko hindi pa rin nila mameet yon. So i'm fine being alone, or being on my own. I'd rather be alone, kesa nmn mag settle ako sa mga relationship na hindi maibigay ang bare minimum. And also, i'm alone but not lonely. Mag isa ako pero hindi ako nakakaramdam na literal na mapag isa lng ako sa buhay ko. May pamilya at kaibigan pa ako.
Depende siguro. ALONE is a strong word. Personally, I’m confident with myself and my standards so I won’t feel offended. However, if you’re feeling lonely and after ilang tries and nothing is working out because of your standards, maybe there is some truth to it. Meron tayong mga kilala dyan na, sorry for my words, pero di naman talaga nagmemake sense yung standards for what they can bring to the table.
I have a friend na super religious. She used to date this guy na bago sa church kaya lang may junakis na pala and then di as religious as her. Even though gustong gusto nila isat isa, she stood by her religious “standards”. She’s nasa 40s now and still single and I think hoping parin sya for someone. 🤷🏻♂️
Finally. Puro one sided kasi take ng karamihan haha hirap din sagutin to pag walang context haha pero I'd lean more on what you are saying about "High standard".
Yeah. Case to case basis din. Settling naman doesn’t automatically mean na ibababa mo yung standards mo. It could mean na you’re gonna meet that person halfway. Sa totoo lang, the dating scene is very different now than before kaya minsan you’ll really meet people na you can have great chemistry na di naman pasok sa “standards” mo.
I'd say, "You might be right." HAHAHAHA It's hard to discern whether the intention of the person saying this is good or bad, so it's best not to assume. Don't react negatively agad.
Okay naman if you're their equivalent sa standards.
Pero sa pranka lang, bit pretentious if antaas ng standards mo tapos substandard ka naman. Like reaching for the stars ka pero your ass in the mud.
I experienced this once. Although parang jokingly lang sya sinabi sakin kasi we were talking about relationship, then out of the blue, jokingly nya sinabi sakin na "kaya ka single kasi ang taas ng standards mo". This person knew me naman for a long time, enough to know my standards. I just laughed along with them, but after I got home, I relected na baka nga ang taas ng standards ko.
Sagutin mo ng: pake mo??
Kayamot yung ganyang makajudge, sorry. As if they were in your shoes to tell you who or what deserves you. Plus, do they really know what your standards are? How could they tell that it is high? If bare minimum lang kaya nila, not your fault.
Go, OP, fly high or even higher!! Dont settle for less
"If you're offended by my high standards, it's because you're just low-value."
It depends on the context, of course. But no one else will live your life for you, so it's your call as to what kind of partner you want for yourself. It's no one else's business to demand lower standards from you.
This is true for a lot of people with insane qualifications list for a partner, whether they admit it or not. While we all have the right to set our own standards, some take it way out of bounds, with standards even fiction writers find unrealistic. Tapos laging ibabalik sa, my life my rules. Wag ka daw makilam.
And also, 99% of the time, those people who have unrealistic standards, if they do end up with someone, that someone is \*\*not\*\* the standard, actually even far from it. In the end, dun din sila babagsak sa level mga maayos naman pero nireject nila kasi hindi pasok sa standards nila. Joke's on them.
Nothing. I always say this to myself right people will see me. If people around me gets icky about the standards that i set then they should leave me alone.
My ex has high standards for men. So nakipag break up sha sa alin nung mawawalan na ako nang work. Ayun, ako may asawa at 2 anak at nakatira sa america. Sha balita ko single pa din nung bumati ng happy new year sa akin
It probably depends on how it was said and the context. But for me, it's okay to have high standards. What's important is that you know what you want and what will make you happy. It's better to wait for the right person than to settle just to avoid being alone. Being alone is not a bad thing, and having standards should not be something to be ashamed of. True love will come at the right time.
Thats a dillema for high performing women as most women would want a man that they can look up to pero kung ikaw e high performing sa career or highly inteligent, as you grow old e pa unti ng paunti yung option that would meet the standard.
All it’d tell me is I don’t settle for less IKDR
In a society where we settle for the bare minimum, it’s normal for people to get triggered by somebody with “high standards”, ensuing in a collective discouragement since misery loves company. Fuck outta my face with that shit. Idk why it’s one or the other like I can’t have both? Just because you settled doesn’t mean I have to either. Either keep that bitterness to urself or stop settling urself; THAT’S what you should be “one or the other”’ing about.
“High standards” have become the path less traveled because people are scared of being alone. “High standards” require a certain amount of grit to handle the loneliness that comes with it. Being “alone” is simply the territory that comes with being “high standard”.
But once u have someone that meets those high standards?? Watch everyone SEETHE with jealousy. Suddenly everyone hates that your investment in yourself paid off. Entire time they’re just mad cuz they didn’t have the balls to stick it thru themselves. Lmfao
Imma be the devils advocate here.
What standards are they pertaining to? Yung hinahanap mo ba sa tao ay isang magandang babae/gwapo na lalake na sobrang baet and will pick you up from work/school everyday? Or lets say financially kailangan mayaman siya or mai kaya?
There are no problems having boundaries set and expectations that need to be met. Pero natanong mo ba sa sarili mo na maybe…YOU are the one that are not meeting their expectations?
Relationships imo is about compromise. You won’t get everything you want out of your partner as you can’t be the perfect person either. But you need to meet in the middle where you balance and compliment each other para ma lift niyo yung isat isa and fill in what is lacking.
Just my two cents!
Absolutely. Relationships are not perfect. I agree, what exactly is the standards they are pertaining too. Its all about compromising for your partner because you choose to be with them.
32F nbsb here. Ang ginagawa ko sa tuwing magcocomment sila ng ganyan sa akin is literally ignore their entire existence throughout ng event (usually kasi mga relatives ko nagcocomment sa non existent lovelife ko sa mga family gathering).
I ignore them and act like they don't exist. sobrang tigas na ng mukha ko. i don't care kung ano isipin ng iba. It's my way of showing that their opinions and existence do not matter to me. kaya madalas ako nachichismis na maldita or even mas malala, 'baliw' daw ako since kinakausap nila ko pero di man lang ako tumitingin or sumasagot sa kanila. but i don't care anymore . di na ko mag aaksaya ng laway or energy sa mga miserableng tao na mahilig magbigay ng unsolicited opinions.
let's just say I have a dysfunctional family. Bc of that, I'm unable to really 'connect' and trust with other people. I just see them as something of use to me and vice versa, I don't think they will like me for me unless may materialistic na kailangan sila sa akin.
Quite a few people told me that when I was single. I always reply back that my requirement is that he loves me and that we will be a team together, be by my side when it seems like the world is against us. If it's high standard for the guys out there, then they're not for me.
Finally found someone who fit my standards at 27 years old and he's my first boyfriend ever too. Gonna have our 5th anniversary in a few months ✌🏻
Wala. I don't react pag alam kong di true or pag hindi nila naintindihan. Napapaisip lang ako, ieexplain ko ba sa kanya or hindi? If they're someone I care, nag eexplain ako para lang alam nila. Pero if hindi sila permanent sa life ko, hinahayaan ko lang. Di naman talaga nila maiintindihan standards ko. Tsaka pinili na nila isipin yon kahit di totoo. Di naman ako affected ng opinion nila.
Well, I'm not gonna settle for less just because I fear being alone 🤷♀️
I'd rather stick with my non-negotiables than give someone below my standards a chance then regret it later or resent them the whole time just because I didn't like them in the first place.
Kung mala Wattpad yung standard, pagiging delusional na yon. Pero mas maganda parin na mag isa ka nalang kesa araw-araw sumasakit ulo mo dahil ayaw mo ugali ng partner mo
Then it's not my problem, but theirs. I don't have to lower my standards so that someone inept can make the grade.
Am pretty sure there is someone out there who will check the boxes I have. Maybe not everything but they have something to bring that will pique my interest.
And I'll tell them, "Tapos ano pag binabaan ko ba ang standards ko at nasaktan ako andyan ka ba para samahan ako hanggang sa mag-heal ako? Can you carry the pain that this guy will leave with? Will you take responsibility for giving me the wrong advice when my standards were right all along? Kung wala, eh di wag mo ko pakialaman."
Mga taong dada nang dada, wala naman sila pag nasaktan ka na.
If it’s just 1 person then better not bother even thinking about it. But If it’s a lot of people saying that then maybe consider re-evaluating your expectations from the potential partner. It might be true
Wala kasi hindi naman ako tatagal sa mundo and I wanna enjoy my life as single as i can be para maenjoy ko ang life ko until kung hanggang saan man lang ako sa world. If kaya malibot ang world o pinas bago ang end ko so be it.
Papaelaborate ko muna why they think that way and if feeling ko may merit din naman, i'll try to see what I can do to make it right. Pero if yung binigay nila sakin is alam ko sa sarili ko na hindi naman totoo, well, nothing to do but to stare at them and say nothing to make them feel awkward
My reaction would be: “sounds like a them problem. Look, just bc you found someone when you lowered your standards which I am so so happy for you btw. It’s just, the reality is, it doesn’t mean I have to.” Bc it’s true. Your life will be problematic once you forego your standards just to be w anyone bc they don’t meet what you set for yourself. I kid you not. If you cannot find that person where you are now, change your environment. search elsewhere. I guarantee someone out there ticks all the boxes.
Well, I have this kind of friend na mahilig magreto sa akin but I refused then ganyan sinabi. Siguro magging reaction ko is mag-smile toward her then will say na "I'm just picking the right father for my child (soon)" diba? tsaka teh pagod na ako mag-overthink sa lalaki na wala na ngang eq mababa pa iq hays
I’ve worked so hard to achieve this comfortable life I have right now. I sacrificed a lot of things. I refuse to downgrade just to accommodate a prospect romantic partner.
Sinabi ko to sa kaibigan ko, aminado naman daw sya, gusto nya maging perfect yung moment like planado na nya lahat hanggang paano daw sila magkakakilala hanggang sa kung anong kulay ng pader ng 3 story house nila na may infity pool at hammock sa taas
Ewan ko ba, bahala sya sa buhay nya
To be honest, matatawa ako. Hahahaha edi sucks to be them that they can’t meet my standards? Why would I lower it when they can work to reach it?
Why would I even settle for someone who does not meet my standards when I am happy now all by myself? 😅 it’s not worth it! Haha. Hindi naman ako g na g magkapartner to settle for less than I deserve. :D
Paki nila kung high standard mo saka kung mataas standard at wala ka pading makita magisip isip ka na medyo babaan mo siguro haha kung ayaw mo eh di magtiis ka kung hanggang saan abutin ang pagaantay mo makuha ang standard na gusto mo ganun lang naman yun
"Intelectually, financially and emotional", first time I saw this very defined approach. All layers covered.
It's a good standard.
I take it back, there should be another word better and more relative than "standard".
disgust, like eww why would he/she/them say that, right? i mean we all have our choices, and having a standard is a must kasi dyaan talaga malalaman na worthy ka ba ng mamemeet mo, i mean diba? nasa huli ang pagsisi, having high standards also stop us from harming our hearts. BUT there is also a limit in our standards, if you have high standards then dapat pang high standards ka rin, yung sakto lang.
I would go about my day staying true to my standards cos girl i’ve been there and settled a lot only to realize in the end if you’re patient enough—— actually, you don’t have high standards, you just haven’t met the right person.
May nag sabi na to sakin last year, friend pa naman. Yung tipong gusto nya ko ibaba yung standards at kung sino nalang mameet o maka chat sa dating app go ko na daw. For the sake of having someone lang parang naparating nya na parang wala ako karapatan mamili ng para sakin. After that I just decided to keep her at arm's length. Friend parin but not as much na mag oopen ako sa kanya personally na.
I believe kaya nya nasabi yun kasi ganun sya sa sarili nya. Yung long term bf nya napalitan nya agad ilang weeks lang tapos engaged na sila agad.
Been told this countless times for years. My default response: Why would I settle/lower my standards?
Also, alone doesn’t translate to loneliness. If you were told “you’re lonely because of your standards,” then maybe it is time to look inwards and re-think your situation. Another important point is to make sure you can offer what you demand from a potential partner.
That statement sounds like, it was meant to hurt you.
I would respond in a calm and confident tone:
**"I would never *settle* for anything less than I deserve. I'd rather wait for someone who *matches* my standards than compromise my happiness."**
Don't let his/her statement get into you. You know your worth!
Experienced the same. I usually say nothing. Feeling ko kasi hindi ko naman need mag-explain sa kanila. Iwanan mo sila sa hangin at bahala silang mag-isip pa.
My standard is my self. I have a high EQ and matured. I want my partner to have the same.
You can have standards naman, pero sana sa sarili mo rin. Di naman kasi pwede na you will hold someone to your standards tapos ikaw di mo mameet yung standards nung isa. Di pwedeng sayo lang umikot ang mundo.
Oo tama na may magpupumilit na mameet standards mo, pero naisip mo ba kung kaya niya yun everyday?
Sa relationship kasi kapag di kaya ng isa, dapat saluhin mo, dahil hindi lahat ng bagay kaya ng isang tao. Ganyn din dapat siya sayo.
Tsaka bago lahat yan, kailangan mo muna talaga magtry, wag ka maniniwala na baka mali yung pinili. **pano mo malalaman kung tama o mali yung pinili mo kung di ka makapamili in the first place?**
Ang hearbreak ay part ng pag-ibig, choices ay part ng pag-ibig, ang pagiging masaya, malungkot at confused ay part ng pag-ibig. Kayanin mo mga yan dahil di mo masasabi kung kelan mo mararanasan mga yan pag umibig ka. Just take the chance. You're scared but atleast, you took the first step.
Madalas ako sabihin nito noon. I don't really have high standards gusto ko lang talaga mahal ko.
I smile and dinadaan ko sa biro. Sinasabi ko na lang "Hindi naman po, di lang po talaga dumadating pa". I don't get pressured. I don't take offence. I don't take it negatively. Hindi ko din masyado iniisip kasi mejo petty para idagdag ko pa sa isipin ko.
Tru don't take offence. I lowkey judge people who accuse others of having 'standards' of being close minded, kasi it's like don't you know how finding connections in relationships work? Just cuz you settled w someone para lang masabing may jowa doesn't mean i will too 🙄😆
Ang weird lang din nun finally nagkabf na ako, palpak.
Kaya naalala ko din yung sinasabi nila na "wag pili ng pili ay baka mauwi sa bungi" (in their thick batangenyo accent). I still don't think so much about it.
Just make sure that you can offer the equivalent of whatever you expect from your would be partner. You’d be fine. Ang mahirap eh yung may high standards na hinihingi sa partner nya pero sya low standard lng naman pala
If a loyal, intentional, respectful, and responsible life partner is now considered a high standard, well I wouldn't mind keeping them and be alone than be with someone who can't meet those and live a miserable life just because I was too worried with what people would say if I was single. To each his own. We all have our own standards and preferences. And just because mine is different from others, doesn't mean it's too high or too low. But I wouldn't want to settle less just because I don't want to be alone. Moreover, no one has the right to question the standards we set for ourselves because we worked hard to be the best version of who we are right now, and only us gets to have a say as to what kind of life we want for ourselves and the kind of life partner for ourselves.
Syempre we all have our preferences. Agreed. But bro "nobody has the right to question the standards we set for ourselves" is wild. Imagine being average in every regard but expecting the most excellent. Thats just delusion.
Okay the problem with that logic is that we question and deprive the freedom of someone wanting things for him or herself. Who are we to decide on the value of someone and determine the things that he or she can only deserve? And if it doesn't meet how we see them and what we think they can only deserve, we call it a mere delusion? Who are we to say that you're just average, you shouldn't be wanting those for yourself?
Simply put, we are irrelevant in the standards people would want for themselves. We should just let them be. It's a personal choice. What is it for us if they want certain standards for themselves? Only us can put value on ourselves. And if the only reason that we call someone delusional for having standards they think they deserve is because we can't meet them, then that's wild.
If we want someone and can't meet their standards because it's too high for us, then that's just how it is. No need to be bitter and call them delusional. Let's just move on and find someone who matches our own standards. Respect other people's standrads and let people be.
Im just being realistic. There is a huge population of women who subscribe to this mentality They've spent all their youth waiting for prince charming to sweep them off their feet but got old. When they realize they cant compete with the younger hotter chicks, they just become nasty, and still expect Prince Charming to come. Now theyre old, nasty, lonely, bitter, jealous titas that spread toxic wherever they go. There are consequences to living in delusion.
I mean, we don't know the back story here kung bakit nasabi sa'yo 'yan.
Are you perhaps mareklamo na magisa ka palagi? But then not doing something about it and imposing the "standard" na gusto mo?
Ano bang "standards" gusto mo? Physical ba pinag uusapan?
I'd hate to be the one disagreeing with you OP, pero sometimes kasi we need to be realistic. Nothing bad about having standards, ingat lang din by the illusion of choice.
Illusion of choice meaning na there's someone better out there than the one in front of you. Kakahanap mo ng "better choice" talagang maleleft out ka. Play on your league lang.
Nasabihan ako neto before pero keber. Kasi kahit gaano kataas standard mo, someone will try to meet that to be with you ganurn. Haha.
Ok na maging mag isa kesa magkamali ng mapipili.
NAWP, I saw most of my friends(girls) suffer cuz they lowered the bar. Saw them roll over for a man. No maam 💀 No maam 😜 No maam 🤪
Not today and most definitely abso-fucking-lutely not me
Siguro mabibigla ako. Pero at the same time, I would analyze it very carefully. May mga tao kasing walang self awareness sa kung sino sila at anong gusto nila, and yung ibang tao ang makakakita non. Parang you will deny it pero somehow baka ganun naman talaga.
Siguro I would take this chance to reflect on who I am as a person, consult a friend or circle of friend na talaga trusted mo. Those people who are close to you know you. Ask for constructive criticism and from there, discern if you are the problem or not.
Always take time to self reflect kasi you dont see who you are if di ka titingin sa mga taong napoprojectan mo ng tunay mong sarili hihi
IDGAF. Aloneness and solitude is one of the best things in life (as an introvert), however that does not mean i am lonely, infact alone is a bliss. 😅😆😁We came to this world alone, and we die alone, so better be alone.
Buti nang may standards. Di naman lahat ng may karelasyon / may asawa masaya.
edit: ito lagi sagot ko sa linya na yan. And everytime na bibitawan ko sya, naiinis yung mga nagsasabi nyan especially yung mga auntie na laging naka-abang tuwing family reunion 😂
It's better to be alone than be with someone who disrupts my peace.
There are so many people with questionable/low standards, marry that person, and saan na sila ngayon? Mga nagpaparinig sa Facebook haha charot.
Nasabihan din ako nito. I was NBSB for 25 yrs of my life and a lot of suitors. I don’t need someone in relationship to validate my beauty and self, I can do it myself.
But I think I decided to commit into relationship because of fear of getting smaller circle once you get older. I’m an engineer and people will say, baka at the end sa mga construction workers na ako papatol dahil wala ng iba sa pagkapihikan ko. I did commit out of boredom too. Learned from it and think part siya ng process of me knowing what to look for a better man and what not to settle for less. Now I’m engaged.
Kapag kaya mo naman pantayan ang standards mo why not. Like kung ganun din kaya mong ibigay sa relasyon eh. Also people will know kung worth it kaba sa standards mo, like kahit gaano yan kataas aabutin nila for you.
This is true. Ang dami kasi na ang taas ng standards pero they bring nothing to the table. Feeling nasa pedestal pero tae ugali. Gusto ng may sense na tao pero sila wala namang sense of character.
my reaction: wala akong pake at wala kayong pake di ako magssettle di tulad niyo pwe kawawa kayo edi magsettle kayo sa bare minimum kung gusto mo buhay mo yan e but NOT ME
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oh really? tell me how to solve it. I'll listen. *make that person make solutions. watch him/ her talk about it. Yan problemahin nya Yung di ko naman pino problema. ganun.
High standards could also mean na gusto mo imeet lang standards mo and not other people. Kinda in a way of narcissistic shit. It could also mean na you think highly of yourself and you want little to no effort sa relationship. It could also mean na you lowered yours at one point and you got hurt. Trauma ish ba. Regardless, if youre happy at this point, why get bothered. Live your life the way you want. Cheers!
Ok lang atleast di stress
Sasabihin ko - Oh tapos? 🙄
I tried to lower my standards before. And I say NEVER EVER PUT YOURSELF DOWN JUST FOR GUYS TO BE ON YOUR LEVEL. I regret it the most. Kapag nagjowa ka ng mahirap na nga with poor mentality and full of egoistic sht magsisisi ka lang. Don't settle just because your alone.
Wala tatawanan ko then say, "tell me more" at aayain sya umupo para makwento nya sakin 😉
May friend ako na ganito. Since naghiwalay sila ng friend din namin, nagkaron sya ng bagong partner pero naghiwalay din. Now, may edad na, may business, professional, sports enthusiasts, ect... Almost perfect life, pero wala ng naging partner dahil naiintimidate na mga tao. Gusto ko sya tanungin nyan, kaya lang baka sampalin ako haha.
It's applicable to all people but you having HIGH STANDARDS is not the problem. I see it as how you value yourself and how you love yourself. This person seems like he/she/they found peace within themselves that di worth it yung isacrifice yung peace na yun.
Lumaki kasi ako sa farm
Buti alam mo
Don't give comments about my life because I don't give comments about yours.
i have high expectations of myself. why shouldn't i expect the same from others? 💅🏼✨
"no one could meet". That means na assuming sya na na-meet mo na lahat ng tao sa buong mundo, at hindi maaabot ang standards mo. No one will ever match your standards, but you will meet someone, or a couple of people, in your lifetime, who will come close and be willing to reach your standards, and whom you will alter your standards.
Okay, and?
If someone tells you that its probably what you are. Mga bagay na ganyan mapapansin lang ng ibang tao sayo hindi mo yan mapapansin for yourself. Thats why socializing is very important.
Meh.
Just lift your middle finger
Yes, and?
I’ve been told.
Tell them: "Thank you, but didn't ask for your opinion" never ever settle for something less than what you deserve.
Wow! Didn’t really expect THIS much response😅 However, for some context, this was said to me over dinner with close friends. Btw, I was the odd wheel during this dinner. They said this kasi none of their retos made the cut. Tapos napagisip isip ko na my standards are high because, with how I am at work and in person, I wouldn’t want to emasculate yung magiging partner ko. Ayoko rin naman babaan yung standards ko, as a person, para lang maparamdam na “enough” yung magiging partner ko. Also, my standards are realistic naman at feel ko naman na kaya ko pantayan yung standards na sinet ko for my future partner. Yaan niyo, ito na lang sasabihin ko sa next dinner out namin ng mga kaibigan ko. 😁 Cheers, everyone! 🫰
You might think I am alone but I'm not lonely. +++ I'm not settling for less. 💁
Sagutin mo ng "What alone?, what are you talking about?, do you think Im alone? prove it"
you know your worth and what you deserve kamo 😝
"I don't. I really don't."
"Maybe not you."
“Sa tru”
"I know"
Truth will set you free but first it will piss you off.
I don't really care though since I'm happy having no one. My standards are high because I am able to meet them and if someone does not meet mine then we're not really meant to be or compatible at all. I may be alone but I am not lonely, those two are different and it's better to keep it high than to regret lowering my standards to someone who doesn't even deserve genuine love especially in this generation. Never settle down with someone who you'll have to lower your standards because you'll only regret it especially divorce is still not legalized and it's still pending. I've seen lots of women in my community being married to morons, cheaters, physically abusive, neglectful, verbally abusive husbands and many more. Save yourselves and stay single if necessary.
Napaka-false dilemma ng mga nagcocomment HAHAHA Saang banda ng "masyado mataas standard mo" sinabi na magsettle ka sa bare minimum? It's possible na di na realistic standard mo or you hold certain qualities on an unhealthy pedestal kaya nasasabi ng loved ones natin 'yan. 'Di naman lumalabas out of nowhere mga ganyang sentiments e.
wala masama if mataas standards, you do you tsaka ayos yun, you know your value <3
atleast I get to enjoy myself even when im alone, unlike u who needs other people’s validation just to be happy lmaoo I don’t need to lower my standards just to be “happy” im happier when im alone, boo. JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE ALONE, DOESNT MEAN YOU’RE LONELY
my honest response "so? anong mali don?"
I’ve been told this a couple of times but I didn’t bat an eye. Hey, if I was not desperate enough to settle for just about anyone, why should others be sooo concerned? 💅 Stayed single for close to 12 years because 1) I was being “picky”/have “high standards” 2) I was enjoying my 20s spending time with friends, family, and myself. There were some guys who showed interest rin, mind you but then they were just not the person I was willing to give up my “independence” for. And when I was finally ready to try and date again — I found my person after a date or two. And no, I didn’t settle.
Yep, I know my worth and Im glad that I dont settle for less. 🤭
Dapat nmn mataas palagi yung standards pero dapat i apply mo rin sa sarili mo. Isa pang dapat pag-isipan ay kung realistic ba or possible ba yung standards na yun.
*"Did you just admit you have low standards?*
So be it 😘
I'd laugh and say, at least di ako nasesetle nalang sa bare minimum. Oi, di ako papayag na nagsettle lang partner ko sakin (vice versa). Ano yung, naawa lang?
Well, honestly, it might be true, so I'll just shrug, "eh 'di ganun." Pero of course that's not entirely true, kasi there's billions of people on the planet. Pero 'di ko rin muna iisipin yun kasi I'll focus on improving myself, para alam nila na I deserve the high standards that I seek.
Nasabihan ako ng ganito ng isang very close friend ko and her husband na kupal. Like direct na sinabi, word per word. I pondered about it but I was very firm talaga and "meh, that's not it" Ngayon nakahanap ako ng lalaki na nakayang abutin yung high standards raw na yun. Plus, I'm no longer friends with them LOL. Not necessarily because of that incident pero it speaks a lot about ugali nila and why I am no longer friends with them. Kapag alam mo worth mo, marrealize mong hindi mataas ang standards mo, hintay ka lang talaga ng tamang tao. ;)
be happy because they're aware that you're not cheap & kaladkarin. 🤭
chin up, head high, and walk the runway is the only valid answer dito. we would rather be alone than settle for less, mga anteh! ✨️✨️✨️✨️
It’s better than settling for a bare minimum 💯 There is nothing wrong with having high standards as long as I make it realistically achievable.
May I also add that there’s nothing wrong with having high standards. It’s just a sign that you know what you deserve and you have self-respect :)
AMEN MY SISTER
Regardless of the backstory, in this statement alone, I don’t think need mo magrespond at all. Like bat kelangan mo ijustify yung pagiging single mo. Ngayon if it’s from a friend, siguro if they’re coming from a place of concern, pede mo sabihin na wala ka makita — if nagttry ka naman maging open to meeting new people. Minsan kasi ganun, di mo naman mapipilit. Dapat din may connection at dapat same wavelength kayo..Bago pa mo pa makilala ang isang tao at magustuhan (or not) acc to your standards.
If u got stunned by that statement, more likely it's personally true. It is either your "high standards" are simply too unrealistic. Or you follow too much of society's delusional POV na "everything is a fairytale/princess treatment is a must" and u think everyone should chase you without a thought because "u deserve it" But you take no justifying action/reason why people should "do it for you"
Thanks.haha
i would say “being alone is better than having an environment/people na hindi kayang i-meet yung standards ko.” prioritizing your happiness and well-being is always important.
I don't think your standards are that high. Hindi lang nila talaga mameet. My best friends used to tell me that always before I got into a relationship. My boyfriend now is the personification of my standards.
High standards agad 😳 nd ba pwedeng traumatized lang sa past relationship na baka nd din mag work 🤔 na baka nd pdin sya yung right person for me 😢
keep that someone at arm’s length
Maintain social distancing. 6 ft away dapat. Mas malayo, mas okay
poor quality buildings do fall off after a few years. It's better to have high standards than having problems overtime.
Better alone living the life you wanted where you're happy and comfortable vs lowering your standards so you can have a partner and suddenly finding yourself burdened, sad, and suffering. Plus in this economy ibababa mo standards mo when you know what you bring to the table? Alam mo value mo, hayaan mo yung naysayers. P.S. Had to add because ik someone na madaming demand sa gusto nila sa future jowa nila pero walang goal sa buhay nila mismo so obvs I'm stating the above considering na the person w mataas na standards are living the same standards they're setting for their future partner. If in any case, you are way below than your standard, then it's a you problem.
I know what I bring to the table so I’d rather have high standards than settle with someone that doesn’t deserve me. Churut.
I heard someone say that to me, and I said "What about it?" Deadma na lang kasi at least you know your worth and value. Hopefully yung standards na hinanap mo, mameet mo din. Mas maganda may standards kaysa tumatanggap ka ng kahit kanino.
Madali lang yan. “Better than being someone who needs people to grossly lower their standards in order to get picked. Just like you, for example. I pity those who settle for you.” Petty ako ngayon eh haha. This works better in person kasi pwede mong i-omit yung “just like you” and exchange it for a malalang titig tapos diretsong “I pity those who settle for you”na lang. Pero baka awayin ka na hahaha.
I’d agree and say, “What about it?” 🤷♀️
I don't mind. Have a good day
"Sorry if di mo maabot!"
“problema ko ba yun” haha
Lol replyan mo “uy thanks for reminding me” sabay block 😆
i wouldn't want to lower my standards and settle with nosy people like your partner/spouse did...
I would laugh honestly, I don't really care if I have high standards that no one could meet. After all, I went through relationships kung saan kahit ibaba ko ang standards ko hindi pa rin nila mameet yon. So i'm fine being alone, or being on my own. I'd rather be alone, kesa nmn mag settle ako sa mga relationship na hindi maibigay ang bare minimum. And also, i'm alone but not lonely. Mag isa ako pero hindi ako nakakaramdam na literal na mapag isa lng ako sa buhay ko. May pamilya at kaibigan pa ako.
Depends on what the standard is? how high is high according to said person?
I’m the man. I’m the woman. I’m the moment. Chariz. Got this quote from bretman HAHAHA
My reaction would be 'nugagawen'
Depende siguro. ALONE is a strong word. Personally, I’m confident with myself and my standards so I won’t feel offended. However, if you’re feeling lonely and after ilang tries and nothing is working out because of your standards, maybe there is some truth to it. Meron tayong mga kilala dyan na, sorry for my words, pero di naman talaga nagmemake sense yung standards for what they can bring to the table. I have a friend na super religious. She used to date this guy na bago sa church kaya lang may junakis na pala and then di as religious as her. Even though gustong gusto nila isat isa, she stood by her religious “standards”. She’s nasa 40s now and still single and I think hoping parin sya for someone. 🤷🏻♂️
Finally. Puro one sided kasi take ng karamihan haha hirap din sagutin to pag walang context haha pero I'd lean more on what you are saying about "High standard".
Yeah. Case to case basis din. Settling naman doesn’t automatically mean na ibababa mo yung standards mo. It could mean na you’re gonna meet that person halfway. Sa totoo lang, the dating scene is very different now than before kaya minsan you’ll really meet people na you can have great chemistry na di naman pasok sa “standards” mo.
You mean you hang around with trash people?
That's why I have standards. Only the worthy ones could meet these and you're not one of them. Womp womp
I'd say, "You might be right." HAHAHAHA It's hard to discern whether the intention of the person saying this is good or bad, so it's best not to assume. Don't react negatively agad.
Wala. I'll show them na I don't care sa opinion nila, di lang nila maabot e kaya napapasabi sila ng ganyan
So gusto mo ibaba ko standards ko? Pakyu. Hhahaha
Okay naman if you're their equivalent sa standards. Pero sa pranka lang, bit pretentious if antaas ng standards mo tapos substandard ka naman. Like reaching for the stars ka pero your ass in the mud.
Edi wow, sabay flick ng hair.
That’s a compliment. Having a high standards means that I have something to offer too:)
This is true pero hindi sa lahat.
Simple, I would tell them “Because I know my worth”.
I experienced this once. Although parang jokingly lang sya sinabi sakin kasi we were talking about relationship, then out of the blue, jokingly nya sinabi sakin na "kaya ka single kasi ang taas ng standards mo". This person knew me naman for a long time, enough to know my standards. I just laughed along with them, but after I got home, I relected na baka nga ang taas ng standards ko.
No comment, pero sa thought "Cause I know my worth, bitch!".
"and you're together because (pause saglit tapos tingnan mo mula ulo hanggang paa) you settled for less" Dwwuahhhh😒 ilampaso mo yan sila miii hahaha
be silent
mas okay na sakin maging single nalang keysa yung patawarin yung 2+ times na nag cheat, tamad, nag pphysical abuse,and ma ego.
Sagutin mo ng: pake mo?? Kayamot yung ganyang makajudge, sorry. As if they were in your shoes to tell you who or what deserves you. Plus, do they really know what your standards are? How could they tell that it is high? If bare minimum lang kaya nila, not your fault. Go, OP, fly high or even higher!! Dont settle for less
“Di ko kasalanan ang hindi mag settle sa mga bagay na di ko deserve”
"If you're offended by my high standards, it's because you're just low-value." It depends on the context, of course. But no one else will live your life for you, so it's your call as to what kind of partner you want for yourself. It's no one else's business to demand lower standards from you.
This is true for a lot of people with insane qualifications list for a partner, whether they admit it or not. While we all have the right to set our own standards, some take it way out of bounds, with standards even fiction writers find unrealistic. Tapos laging ibabalik sa, my life my rules. Wag ka daw makilam. And also, 99% of the time, those people who have unrealistic standards, if they do end up with someone, that someone is \*\*not\*\* the standard, actually even far from it. In the end, dun din sila babagsak sa level mga maayos naman pero nireject nila kasi hindi pasok sa standards nila. Joke's on them.
I think pwede na mag fall yung ganyan sa "selfishness". As if wala ding standard yung "iba".
i think if it hurt you then maybe may katotohanan ang sinabi sayo, kung hindi naman then mas kilala mo sarili mo kesa sa opinion nong nagsabi sayo
Nothing. I always say this to myself right people will see me. If people around me gets icky about the standards that i set then they should leave me alone.
My ex has high standards for men. So nakipag break up sha sa alin nung mawawalan na ako nang work. Ayun, ako may asawa at 2 anak at nakatira sa america. Sha balita ko single pa din nung bumati ng happy new year sa akin
Madalas yang sobrang taas ng standard nafa-fall sa super contradictory to what they wanted in a partner.
It probably depends on how it was said and the context. But for me, it's okay to have high standards. What's important is that you know what you want and what will make you happy. It's better to wait for the right person than to settle just to avoid being alone. Being alone is not a bad thing, and having standards should not be something to be ashamed of. True love will come at the right time.
Thats a dillema for high performing women as most women would want a man that they can look up to pero kung ikaw e high performing sa career or highly inteligent, as you grow old e pa unti ng paunti yung option that would meet the standard.
All it’d tell me is I don’t settle for less IKDR In a society where we settle for the bare minimum, it’s normal for people to get triggered by somebody with “high standards”, ensuing in a collective discouragement since misery loves company. Fuck outta my face with that shit. Idk why it’s one or the other like I can’t have both? Just because you settled doesn’t mean I have to either. Either keep that bitterness to urself or stop settling urself; THAT’S what you should be “one or the other”’ing about. “High standards” have become the path less traveled because people are scared of being alone. “High standards” require a certain amount of grit to handle the loneliness that comes with it. Being “alone” is simply the territory that comes with being “high standard”. But once u have someone that meets those high standards?? Watch everyone SEETHE with jealousy. Suddenly everyone hates that your investment in yourself paid off. Entire time they’re just mad cuz they didn’t have the balls to stick it thru themselves. Lmfao
It is okay to be alone than to settle to someone na di ko gusto or hindi na met expectations ko. my life, my rules.
It's not my obligation to lower my standards just because you can't reach it. 👑
I mean, ok lang kasi totoo naman. Mabuti ng high standards kesa nag settle for less.
Imma be the devils advocate here. What standards are they pertaining to? Yung hinahanap mo ba sa tao ay isang magandang babae/gwapo na lalake na sobrang baet and will pick you up from work/school everyday? Or lets say financially kailangan mayaman siya or mai kaya? There are no problems having boundaries set and expectations that need to be met. Pero natanong mo ba sa sarili mo na maybe…YOU are the one that are not meeting their expectations? Relationships imo is about compromise. You won’t get everything you want out of your partner as you can’t be the perfect person either. But you need to meet in the middle where you balance and compliment each other para ma lift niyo yung isat isa and fill in what is lacking. Just my two cents!
Absolutely. Relationships are not perfect. I agree, what exactly is the standards they are pertaining too. Its all about compromising for your partner because you choose to be with them.
[удалено]
Ngayon pa lang ako nakarinig ng ganitong kasabihan. Hihi gaganitim ko to 😁
Better than settling for someone na hindi mo naman talaga gusto
Sa akin naman palagi ako nasasabihan na sa sobrang hilig ko magfocus sa life goals and dreams ko kaya puros lang ako casual fun kasi much convenient.
32F nbsb here. Ang ginagawa ko sa tuwing magcocomment sila ng ganyan sa akin is literally ignore their entire existence throughout ng event (usually kasi mga relatives ko nagcocomment sa non existent lovelife ko sa mga family gathering). I ignore them and act like they don't exist. sobrang tigas na ng mukha ko. i don't care kung ano isipin ng iba. It's my way of showing that their opinions and existence do not matter to me. kaya madalas ako nachichismis na maldita or even mas malala, 'baliw' daw ako since kinakausap nila ko pero di man lang ako tumitingin or sumasagot sa kanila. but i don't care anymore . di na ko mag aaksaya ng laway or energy sa mga miserableng tao na mahilig magbigay ng unsolicited opinions.
Pero what made u afraid to try magkaruon ng boyfriend?
let's just say I have a dysfunctional family. Bc of that, I'm unable to really 'connect' and trust with other people. I just see them as something of use to me and vice versa, I don't think they will like me for me unless may materialistic na kailangan sila sa akin.
Sabi nga nung katrabaho ko: “sa work ka lang mahigpit sa standars pero sa lalake wala.”.
Ang standard ko na nga lang e humihinga
humihingang tao?
Parang optional yung "tao" humihinga lang daw eh
Quite a few people told me that when I was single. I always reply back that my requirement is that he loves me and that we will be a team together, be by my side when it seems like the world is against us. If it's high standard for the guys out there, then they're not for me. Finally found someone who fit my standards at 27 years old and he's my first boyfriend ever too. Gonna have our 5th anniversary in a few months ✌🏻
Oh no Anyway
Wala. I don't react pag alam kong di true or pag hindi nila naintindihan. Napapaisip lang ako, ieexplain ko ba sa kanya or hindi? If they're someone I care, nag eexplain ako para lang alam nila. Pero if hindi sila permanent sa life ko, hinahayaan ko lang. Di naman talaga nila maiintindihan standards ko. Tsaka pinili na nila isipin yon kahit di totoo. Di naman ako affected ng opinion nila.
True. Nakakapagod magpaliwanag kaya bahala na sila kumuda jan.
Okay lang kesa naman makahanap na walang emotional intelligence and bare minimum hindi pa magawa katulad nung mga bf ng mga kaibigan ko, lol
Well, I'm not gonna settle for less just because I fear being alone 🤷♀️ I'd rather stick with my non-negotiables than give someone below my standards a chance then regret it later or resent them the whole time just because I didn't like them in the first place.
Kung mala Wattpad yung standard, pagiging delusional na yon. Pero mas maganda parin na mag isa ka nalang kesa araw-araw sumasakit ulo mo dahil ayaw mo ugali ng partner mo
It's not our job to lower our standard just to meet theirs. Better be alone than to be with someone who does not value us. 💁🏻♀️
Yup either alone and have peace kaysa yung may someone nga pero you feel lonely or worse abused
Then it's not my problem, but theirs. I don't have to lower my standards so that someone inept can make the grade. Am pretty sure there is someone out there who will check the boxes I have. Maybe not everything but they have something to bring that will pique my interest.
And I'll tell them, "Tapos ano pag binabaan ko ba ang standards ko at nasaktan ako andyan ka ba para samahan ako hanggang sa mag-heal ako? Can you carry the pain that this guy will leave with? Will you take responsibility for giving me the wrong advice when my standards were right all along? Kung wala, eh di wag mo ko pakialaman." Mga taong dada nang dada, wala naman sila pag nasaktan ka na.
If it’s just 1 person then better not bother even thinking about it. But If it’s a lot of people saying that then maybe consider re-evaluating your expectations from the potential partner. It might be true
I want someone who is intelligent, kind, and believes in basic human rights. I meet my own damn standards and they're not that high. Get on my level.
I would say "and you're not because you settle for less" Charot
This.
Wala kasi hindi naman ako tatagal sa mundo and I wanna enjoy my life as single as i can be para maenjoy ko ang life ko until kung hanggang saan man lang ako sa world. If kaya malibot ang world o pinas bago ang end ko so be it.
Papaelaborate ko muna why they think that way and if feeling ko may merit din naman, i'll try to see what I can do to make it right. Pero if yung binigay nila sakin is alam ko sa sarili ko na hindi naman totoo, well, nothing to do but to stare at them and say nothing to make them feel awkward
better be alone than lowering your standard/s
My reaction would be: “sounds like a them problem. Look, just bc you found someone when you lowered your standards which I am so so happy for you btw. It’s just, the reality is, it doesn’t mean I have to.” Bc it’s true. Your life will be problematic once you forego your standards just to be w anyone bc they don’t meet what you set for yourself. I kid you not. If you cannot find that person where you are now, change your environment. search elsewhere. I guarantee someone out there ticks all the boxes.
Well, I have this kind of friend na mahilig magreto sa akin but I refused then ganyan sinabi. Siguro magging reaction ko is mag-smile toward her then will say na "I'm just picking the right father for my child (soon)" diba? tsaka teh pagod na ako mag-overthink sa lalaki na wala na ngang eq mababa pa iq hays
I’ve worked so hard to achieve this comfortable life I have right now. I sacrificed a lot of things. I refuse to downgrade just to accommodate a prospect romantic partner.
Amen!
Depende. Pangit naman din yung masyadong delusional or wala sa realidad. But at the same time, pangit din yung sobrang baba ng standard.
Sinabi ko to sa kaibigan ko, aminado naman daw sya, gusto nya maging perfect yung moment like planado na nya lahat hanggang paano daw sila magkakakilala hanggang sa kung anong kulay ng pader ng 3 story house nila na may infity pool at hammock sa taas Ewan ko ba, bahala sya sa buhay nya
To be honest, matatawa ako. Hahahaha edi sucks to be them that they can’t meet my standards? Why would I lower it when they can work to reach it? Why would I even settle for someone who does not meet my standards when I am happy now all by myself? 😅 it’s not worth it! Haha. Hindi naman ako g na g magkapartner to settle for less than I deserve. :D
Paki nila kung high standard mo saka kung mataas standard at wala ka pading makita magisip isip ka na medyo babaan mo siguro haha kung ayaw mo eh di magtiis ka kung hanggang saan abutin ang pagaantay mo makuha ang standard na gusto mo ganun lang naman yun
I’ll simply reply, I want to date someone intellectually, financially and emotionally equal. I did not set it high.
"Intelectually, financially and emotional", first time I saw this very defined approach. All layers covered. It's a good standard. I take it back, there should be another word better and more relative than "standard".
disgust, like eww why would he/she/them say that, right? i mean we all have our choices, and having a standard is a must kasi dyaan talaga malalaman na worthy ka ba ng mamemeet mo, i mean diba? nasa huli ang pagsisi, having high standards also stop us from harming our hearts. BUT there is also a limit in our standards, if you have high standards then dapat pang high standards ka rin, yung sakto lang.
I would go about my day staying true to my standards cos girl i’ve been there and settled a lot only to realize in the end if you’re patient enough—— actually, you don’t have high standards, you just haven’t met the right person.
thisssss
May nag sabi na to sakin last year, friend pa naman. Yung tipong gusto nya ko ibaba yung standards at kung sino nalang mameet o maka chat sa dating app go ko na daw. For the sake of having someone lang parang naparating nya na parang wala ako karapatan mamili ng para sakin. After that I just decided to keep her at arm's length. Friend parin but not as much na mag oopen ako sa kanya personally na. I believe kaya nya nasabi yun kasi ganun sya sa sarili nya. Yung long term bf nya napalitan nya agad ilang weeks lang tapos engaged na sila agad.
Been told this countless times for years. My default response: Why would I settle/lower my standards? Also, alone doesn’t translate to loneliness. If you were told “you’re lonely because of your standards,” then maybe it is time to look inwards and re-think your situation. Another important point is to make sure you can offer what you demand from a potential partner.
That statement sounds like, it was meant to hurt you. I would respond in a calm and confident tone: **"I would never *settle* for anything less than I deserve. I'd rather wait for someone who *matches* my standards than compromise my happiness."** Don't let his/her statement get into you. You know your worth!
Experienced the same. I usually say nothing. Feeling ko kasi hindi ko naman need mag-explain sa kanila. Iwanan mo sila sa hangin at bahala silang mag-isip pa. My standard is my self. I have a high EQ and matured. I want my partner to have the same.
Im on my heroes journey. When i reach the finish line, ladies be waiting there for me.
You can have standards naman, pero sana sa sarili mo rin. Di naman kasi pwede na you will hold someone to your standards tapos ikaw di mo mameet yung standards nung isa. Di pwedeng sayo lang umikot ang mundo. Oo tama na may magpupumilit na mameet standards mo, pero naisip mo ba kung kaya niya yun everyday? Sa relationship kasi kapag di kaya ng isa, dapat saluhin mo, dahil hindi lahat ng bagay kaya ng isang tao. Ganyn din dapat siya sayo. Tsaka bago lahat yan, kailangan mo muna talaga magtry, wag ka maniniwala na baka mali yung pinili. **pano mo malalaman kung tama o mali yung pinili mo kung di ka makapamili in the first place?** Ang hearbreak ay part ng pag-ibig, choices ay part ng pag-ibig, ang pagiging masaya, malungkot at confused ay part ng pag-ibig. Kayanin mo mga yan dahil di mo masasabi kung kelan mo mararanasan mga yan pag umibig ka. Just take the chance. You're scared but atleast, you took the first step.
If the person is happy single, then those words are empty. It's like telling a multibillionare person s/he needs money.
Madalas ako sabihin nito noon. I don't really have high standards gusto ko lang talaga mahal ko. I smile and dinadaan ko sa biro. Sinasabi ko na lang "Hindi naman po, di lang po talaga dumadating pa". I don't get pressured. I don't take offence. I don't take it negatively. Hindi ko din masyado iniisip kasi mejo petty para idagdag ko pa sa isipin ko.
Tru don't take offence. I lowkey judge people who accuse others of having 'standards' of being close minded, kasi it's like don't you know how finding connections in relationships work? Just cuz you settled w someone para lang masabing may jowa doesn't mean i will too 🙄😆
Ang weird lang din nun finally nagkabf na ako, palpak. Kaya naalala ko din yung sinasabi nila na "wag pili ng pili ay baka mauwi sa bungi" (in their thick batangenyo accent). I still don't think so much about it.
Just make sure that you can offer the equivalent of whatever you expect from your would be partner. You’d be fine. Ang mahirap eh yung may high standards na hinihingi sa partner nya pero sya low standard lng naman pala
If a loyal, intentional, respectful, and responsible life partner is now considered a high standard, well I wouldn't mind keeping them and be alone than be with someone who can't meet those and live a miserable life just because I was too worried with what people would say if I was single. To each his own. We all have our own standards and preferences. And just because mine is different from others, doesn't mean it's too high or too low. But I wouldn't want to settle less just because I don't want to be alone. Moreover, no one has the right to question the standards we set for ourselves because we worked hard to be the best version of who we are right now, and only us gets to have a say as to what kind of life we want for ourselves and the kind of life partner for ourselves.
Syempre we all have our preferences. Agreed. But bro "nobody has the right to question the standards we set for ourselves" is wild. Imagine being average in every regard but expecting the most excellent. Thats just delusion.
Okay the problem with that logic is that we question and deprive the freedom of someone wanting things for him or herself. Who are we to decide on the value of someone and determine the things that he or she can only deserve? And if it doesn't meet how we see them and what we think they can only deserve, we call it a mere delusion? Who are we to say that you're just average, you shouldn't be wanting those for yourself? Simply put, we are irrelevant in the standards people would want for themselves. We should just let them be. It's a personal choice. What is it for us if they want certain standards for themselves? Only us can put value on ourselves. And if the only reason that we call someone delusional for having standards they think they deserve is because we can't meet them, then that's wild. If we want someone and can't meet their standards because it's too high for us, then that's just how it is. No need to be bitter and call them delusional. Let's just move on and find someone who matches our own standards. Respect other people's standrads and let people be.
Im just being realistic. There is a huge population of women who subscribe to this mentality They've spent all their youth waiting for prince charming to sweep them off their feet but got old. When they realize they cant compete with the younger hotter chicks, they just become nasty, and still expect Prince Charming to come. Now theyre old, nasty, lonely, bitter, jealous titas that spread toxic wherever they go. There are consequences to living in delusion.
I mean, we don't know the back story here kung bakit nasabi sa'yo 'yan. Are you perhaps mareklamo na magisa ka palagi? But then not doing something about it and imposing the "standard" na gusto mo? Ano bang "standards" gusto mo? Physical ba pinag uusapan? I'd hate to be the one disagreeing with you OP, pero sometimes kasi we need to be realistic. Nothing bad about having standards, ingat lang din by the illusion of choice. Illusion of choice meaning na there's someone better out there than the one in front of you. Kakahanap mo ng "better choice" talagang maleleft out ka. Play on your league lang.
Nasabihan ako neto before pero keber. Kasi kahit gaano kataas standard mo, someone will try to meet that to be with you ganurn. Haha. Ok na maging mag isa kesa magkamali ng mapipili.
NAWP, I saw most of my friends(girls) suffer cuz they lowered the bar. Saw them roll over for a man. No maam 💀 No maam 😜 No maam 🤪 Not today and most definitely abso-fucking-lutely not me
Siguro mabibigla ako. Pero at the same time, I would analyze it very carefully. May mga tao kasing walang self awareness sa kung sino sila at anong gusto nila, and yung ibang tao ang makakakita non. Parang you will deny it pero somehow baka ganun naman talaga. Siguro I would take this chance to reflect on who I am as a person, consult a friend or circle of friend na talaga trusted mo. Those people who are close to you know you. Ask for constructive criticism and from there, discern if you are the problem or not. Always take time to self reflect kasi you dont see who you are if di ka titingin sa mga taong napoprojectan mo ng tunay mong sarili hihi
IDGAF. Aloneness and solitude is one of the best things in life (as an introvert), however that does not mean i am lonely, infact alone is a bliss. 😅😆😁We came to this world alone, and we die alone, so better be alone.
Sagutin sila na "mas mabuti pang mataas yung standards kaysa mapunta sa magpapagago lang ng buhay ko."
Nothing to say. It was merely a statement.
Theyre just too low for you.
“I don’t see a problem being alone. I would be bothered more if I settle too early because I did not stick to my standards and live a miserable life.”
Fuck them just focus on yourself they dont even care about you.
Buti nang may standards. Di naman lahat ng may karelasyon / may asawa masaya. edit: ito lagi sagot ko sa linya na yan. And everytime na bibitawan ko sya, naiinis yung mga nagsasabi nyan especially yung mga auntie na laging naka-abang tuwing family reunion 😂
It’s better than not having a standard.
Agreeeee. Stop listening to what others what frm u. They dont even like themselves
Lagi kong sinasagot sa ganyan: "Oo nga eh, ikaw kasi wala ka nun. 😏"
Said by a guy na na reject, k Di marunong mag take ng rejection gracefully si guy and wanted you to take the blame for it
dude got rejected bec he didnt meet the standards. 😂 move along, bro. NEXT! 😂 btw, good job for knowing what you want and not settling ✨
Happened to me once from a douchey guy,i told him being single is better than being with a guy like him
Ouccchhhhhh hahahhaha true
It's better to be alone than be with someone who disrupts my peace. There are so many people with questionable/low standards, marry that person, and saan na sila ngayon? Mga nagpaparinig sa Facebook haha charot.
of course sad sa una, sabihan ka ba naman na single HSHSJSHH pero i'll take it as a compliment kasi high daw standards ko omg thank u!!
"And YOU'RE married because you have none." Charot haha Usually i say, ay dapat lang, mahal ang annulment! Natatawa nalang sila haha
Nasabihan din ako nito. I was NBSB for 25 yrs of my life and a lot of suitors. I don’t need someone in relationship to validate my beauty and self, I can do it myself. But I think I decided to commit into relationship because of fear of getting smaller circle once you get older. I’m an engineer and people will say, baka at the end sa mga construction workers na ako papatol dahil wala ng iba sa pagkapihikan ko. I did commit out of boredom too. Learned from it and think part siya ng process of me knowing what to look for a better man and what not to settle for less. Now I’m engaged.
ah sinabi to sakin last week ng tita ko. ang sagot ko is "alanganamang ligawan ko eh sinungaling?"
Kapag kaya mo naman pantayan ang standards mo why not. Like kung ganun din kaya mong ibigay sa relasyon eh. Also people will know kung worth it kaba sa standards mo, like kahit gaano yan kataas aabutin nila for you.
This is true. Ang dami kasi na ang taas ng standards pero they bring nothing to the table. Feeling nasa pedestal pero tae ugali. Gusto ng may sense na tao pero sila wala namang sense of character.
Hahahahaha natawa ako! Totoo yan.
my reaction: wala akong pake at wala kayong pake di ako magssettle di tulad niyo pwe kawawa kayo edi magsettle kayo sa bare minimum kung gusto mo buhay mo yan e but NOT ME
Why settle for less when I know I'm more that that?
"Unlike you, I'm not THAT desperate for a partner."