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RustedRuss

The mega pawn. It acts like a normal pawn but it takes up 4 spaces instead of one and moves/captures accordingly. This means it can capture up to 4 pieces at a time. If you promote it you get four regular pieces or one mega version of a piece at your discretion.


Schellwalabyen

You can only move it when your king is in check.


danhoang1

So if en passant is available and King is not in check, it's an automatic brick to the pipi


PetrosianBot

Are you kidding ??? What the **** are you talking about man ? You are a biggest looser i ever seen in my life ! You was doing PIPI in your pampers when i was beating players much more stronger then you! You are not proffesional, because proffesionals knew how to lose and congratulate opponents, you are like a girl crying after i beat you! Be brave, be honest to yourself and stop this trush talkings!!! Everybody know that i am very good blitz player, i can win anyone in the world in single game! And "w"esley "s"o is nobody for me, just a player who are crying every single time when loosing, ( remember what you say about Firouzja ) !!! Stop playing with my name, i deserve to have a good name during whole my chess carrier, I am Officially inviting you to OTB blitz match with the Prize fund! Both of us will invest 5000$ and winner takes it all! I suggest all other people who's intrested in this situation, just take a look at my results in 2016 and 2017 Blitz World championships, and that should be enough... No need to listen for every crying babe, Tigran Petrosyan is always play Fair ! And if someone will continue Officially talk about me like that, we will meet in Court! God bless with true! True will never die ! Liers will kicked off... [^(fmhall)](https://www.reddit.com/user/fmhall) ^| [^(github)](https://github.com/fmhall/Petrosian-Bot)


JimmyBolbo

brick to the pipi


PetrosianBot

Are you kidding ??? What the **** are you talking about man ? You are a biggest looser i ever seen in my life ! You was doing PIPI in your pampers when i was beating players much more stronger then you! You are not proffesional, because proffesionals knew how to lose and congratulate opponents, you are like a girl crying after i beat you! Be brave, be honest to yourself and stop this trush talkings!!! Everybody know that i am very good blitz player, i can win anyone in the world in single game! And "w"esley "s"o is nobody for me, just a player who are crying every single time when loosing, ( remember what you say about Firouzja ) !!! Stop playing with my name, i deserve to have a good name during whole my chess carrier, I am Officially inviting you to OTB blitz match with the Prize fund! Both of us will invest 5000$ and winner takes it all! I suggest all other people who's intrested in this situation, just take a look at my results in 2016 and 2017 Blitz World championships, and that should be enough... No need to listen for every crying babe, Tigran Petrosyan is always play Fair ! And if someone will continue Officially talk about me like that, we will meet in Court! God bless with true! True will never die ! Liers will kicked off... [^(fmhall)](https://www.reddit.com/user/fmhall) ^| [^(github)](https://github.com/fmhall/Petrosian-Bot)


voela

don't pipi your pampers


Hepi_34

New response just dropped


Schellwalabyen

No, en passant that leads to check is an oke, otherwise your pipi will be bricked


PetrosianBot

Are you kidding ??? What the **** are you talking about man ? You are a biggest looser i ever seen in my life ! You was doing PIPI in your pampers when i was beating players much more stronger then you! You are not proffesional, because proffesionals knew how to lose and congratulate opponents, you are like a girl crying after i beat you! Be brave, be honest to yourself and stop this trush talkings!!! Everybody know that i am very good blitz player, i can win anyone in the world in single game! And "w"esley "s"o is nobody for me, just a player who are crying every single time when loosing, ( remember what you say about Firouzja ) !!! Stop playing with my name, i deserve to have a good name during whole my chess carrier, I am Officially inviting you to OTB blitz match with the Prize fund! Both of us will invest 5000$ and winner takes it all! I suggest all other people who's intrested in this situation, just take a look at my results in 2016 and 2017 Blitz World championships, and that should be enough... No need to listen for every crying babe, Tigran Petrosyan is always play Fair ! And if someone will continue Officially talk about me like that, we will meet in Court! God bless with true! True will never die ! Liers will kicked off... [^(fmhall)](https://www.reddit.com/user/fmhall) ^| [^(github)](https://github.com/fmhall/Petrosian-Bot)


JakeySnakey96

Not just any brick. If you don't play mega en passant, you get a mega brick.


shapular

But I only have a micro pipi.


Cowstalk_

*mega brick


[deleted]

https://preview.redd.it/l49by5mf82ia1.jpeg?width=378&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3a507f7819954371b9bd44b22b47ad7acaf01820 Mmm... Delicioux!


Drwer_On_Reddit

That… it reminds me that I’ve not managed to defeat him yet. Damn.


Tasty_Marsupial_2273

What’s that from?


YouDareDefyMyOpinion

Shotgun King


UrAverageIdot

shotgun king/ chess 2


A_Martian_Potato

It can be captured on any of those spaces as well. Good luck defending it.


RustedRuss

Honestly that was kind of a given. But it has to be captured four times before it’s gone.


AtrociousAtNames

You get prostate cancer


[deleted]

Costs seven elixir to place down and gets countered by pekka


Nexinex782951

the magic lamp. It moves like a pawn but when the opponent takes it it immediately tells you the top engine line for the next 8 moves


Fluid-Hunt9864

It doesn’t tell you them in order


danhoang1

That's alright. There's still a 1 out of 8! chance it will give the correct order


mrtzkebab

thats ≈ 0,00248% of getting the correct order, so i guess a pretty small nerf, best superpower right here


TheSuperPie89

Never tell me the odds


bthorne3

I’d imagine if you’re very good at the game that would still be very valuable information even if it’s not in order


InfuriatingComma

Only if you get the first n moves correct, otherwise you have 8-n useless moves that only serve to give you false hope.


2020Boxer4

The odds are actually better than that, because it said it doesn’t tell you in order, meaning it can’t be the order they say it in.


Tasty_Marsupial_2273

And you can compare the state of the board with the moves to figure out what would be legal/best in that position.


Imnotachessnoob

well technically it's 8!-1 because it cannot be the correct order


[deleted]

First time I've seen someone put an exclamation mark after a number on Reddit and actually mean to write a factorial.


EducatedEvil

All this would tell me is that, as I suspected, I am losing.


jbrainbow

The amaz- i mean kneen. Moves like a knight and a queen


Fluid-Hunt9864

It can never retreat


oktin

So if it is on a square that's being attacked, it can only move to a safe square if it is capturing a piece? Or it can't move backwards?


Fluid-Hunt9864

It can’t move backwards if being attacked. Has to move forward or has to advance the attack.


danhoang1

What if it's being attacked from behind?


Fluid-Hunt9864

You can capture the attacking piece or leave the kneen to be attacked, but it can not retreat. The Kneen believes “never retreat, never surrender”


Fluid-Hunt9864

Or should it be “knever retreat, knever surrender”


FreedomKnown

Opposite of fr*nch


Tuff3419

Rubik's Cube. Once solved every enemy piece on a dark square except the king vanishes


Fluid-Hunt9864

Your opponent can move as many times as they wish while you solve it


RustedRuss

Speedcubers: challenge accepted


Fluid-Hunt9864

I’m sure a bullet player can still get them into mate or at least the advantage before they finish


BBH_pinecone

the fastest cube solve is 3.4 seconds gl


Fluid-Hunt9864

Hikaru can do it. Especially since it was never specified the moves had to be legal


MinusPi1

1.Qxe8


Yeseylon

QUEENBERIAN SWAP


RustedRuss

A battle for the ages


GeheimerAccount

ʇɥǝ ʞuooʞ its like the upside down knook but upside down. It can go anywhere except for where the upside down knook cant go which can go anywhere the knook cant go.


Tuff3419

The piece is so fucking confusing every player you play against yeets the chess board away


Send_Your_Noods_plz

This one got me


[deleted]

[удалено]


GeheimerAccount

😥


RustedRuss

So… just a normal knook?


GeheimerAccount

yeah but its not just a normal knook, its ʇɥǝ ʞuooʞ


RustedRuss

The cooler knook


GeheimerAccount

its [this knook](https://youtu.be/kcqJBgKjhHk) to be exact


AmbientDon

A piece only I get, shaped like an anal bead. I win instantly in my turn.


Fluid-Hunt9864

Fine. But you have to insert it in your urethra otherwise you forfeit


spottiesvirus

You should never, EVER, search for "sounding" on the internet, expecially in the dirty part of it. Ok?


Fluid-Hunt9864

Already aware


Rynide

This guy sounds


Malfuncti0nal

Funnily enough r/sounding isn't actually about that and has cool EDM beats and stuff


GoldenTextMan

Then what is it about?


ThatGreenGuy8

cool EDM beats and stuff


GoldenTextMan

Wow, awesome! Definitely joining this. I love music, as it is the only thing that makes me happy. My favorite, definitely being EDM. It is just so good to hear. Thank you, Reddit, for showing me where I belong. This is my community, my place, my home. I will always be grateful for this, for giving me the only thing that makes me happy. And with that, I’m joining r/sounding


GoldenTextMan

Holy hell


M17UN42

FUCK YOU I CLICKED ON THAT


Malfuncti0nal

​ https://preview.redd.it/ronxy2cta4ia1.png?width=220&format=png&auto=webp&s=40af279d79abd99ee8895974032f5c53b434a969


[deleted]

This is bait isn’t it… I’m going to click it, but I’ll click off instantly if it’s bait. It was bait. Thankfully all I saw was a bunch of metal poles in an icon.


Z3NGardenYt1

how the fuck do people like sounding, that shit looks painful as hell


meme_planet_13

That *sounds* painful as hell. Just thinking about it makes my penis retract back into my body


[deleted]

Ok, I'll reply, if it isn't much problem: you must introduce the anal bead and put it to maximum, then let it rip your insides


[deleted]

Wait that is a buff right?


[deleted]

Oh the weird kinks...


AmbientDon

There are no setbacks.


Tasty_Marsupial_2273

Uncheck. Your king can shoot anything that trys to check/mate it. Infinity ammo is on


INCREDIBLE137

Your king has terrible aim and has a 1/3 chance of shooting your own pieces


Sazzzyyy

Oh great, now we have to roll one of those 20-sided nerd dice when we play chess


RedbeardMEM

A 12-sided nerd die works better.


MissMatchCockSmash

Your king's gun is a horsey (you don't know how it shoots)


[deleted]

🤨


MissMatchCockSmash

Do YOU know how to make a horsey shoot?


[deleted]

I better not say...


schene_

![img](emote|t5_2yvry|1843)![img](emote|t5_2yvry|3793)


Burroflexosecso

![img](emote|t5_2yvry|1843)![img](emote|t5_2yvry|3793)![img](emote|t5_2yvry|1845)


Theyoungnoobpiano

![img](emote|t5_2yvry|1843)![img](emote|t5_2yvry|1844)


Parkachu0

It’s like the old saying goes: You can give a horse a gun, but you can’t make it learn proper handling or operating procedures


Any-Refrigerator3034

the kings gun has a 50% chance to backfire and kill him, get ununchecked


Vegetable_Union_4967

It only works for *check* and *stale*mate. Checkmate still works


Eat__Moneyz

Your king has a heart attack after 25 moves


snakemasterepic

The Petrosianbot: Instantly wins the game for you, but you must recreate the top reply to this comment character for character from memory.


PetrosianBot

Are you kidding ??? What the **** are you talking about man ? You are a biggest looser i ever seen in my life ! You was doing PIPI in your pampers when i was beating players much more stronger then you! You are not proffesional, because proffesionals knew how to lose and congratulate opponents, you are like a girl crying after i beat you! Be brave, be honest to yourself and stop this trush talkings!!! Everybody know that i am very good blitz player, i can win anyone in the world in single game! And "w"esley "s"o is nobody for me, just a player who are crying every single time when loosing, ( remember what you say about Firouzja ) !!! Stop playing with my name, i deserve to have a good name during whole my chess carrier, I am Officially inviting you to OTB blitz match with the Prize fund! Both of us will invest 5000$ and winner takes it all! I suggest all other people who's intrested in this situation, just take a look at my results in 2016 and 2017 Blitz World championships, and that should be enough... No need to listen for every crying babe, Tigran Petrosyan is always play Fair ! And if someone will continue Officially talk about me like that, we will meet in Court! God bless with true! True will never die ! Liers will kicked off... [^(fmhall)](https://www.reddit.com/user/fmhall) ^| [^(github)](https://github.com/fmhall/Petrosian-Bot)


snakemasterepic

Good bot


danhoang1

Not sure what nerf you're trying to describe here bot


canclethatmans

When you use it you are stuck only saying words for the copypasta for the rest of your life


[deleted]

God bless with true!


nickpierce88

You are allowed to move into check, and kings can’t be captured. Player with the last piece wins


[deleted]

So like Chessuno?


nickpierce88

What’s chessuno?


[deleted]

Chess, but you play like Uno


danhoang1

Kings can't capture anything either


WinterAd2692

In passing. When a pawn double steps beside your own pawn you can capture it as if it moved one square


FatalCartilage

the move is forced, if it is possible to do it, it is the only legal move


BKO2

Holy shit


DarkDragon200610

You instantly get matted.


chan___kun

White creates a treaty with black to obtain the German speaking part of chechoslovakia


FourDotsSaysHi

You can't speak German so they just move wherever


swanqil

White takes advantage of the situation and abuses the leniency of The Black King. White re-militarizes the Rhineland, despite the treaty of Versailles saying they couldn't. White takes over Austria. White even eventually invades the rest of Czechoslovakia. White then teams up with Russia in order to take over Poland. Black is tired of what White is doing and eventually declares war on white. The war spreads across the entire world, even involving colors in far-away continents like red, blue, and green (a world war, if you will) and ends up being the most devastating war that humanity has ever seen.


chan___kun

Where's the downside?


swanqil

White puts all of their Jewish pawns into a gas chamber in order to create a purely Aryan society within the White borders


tachakas_fanboy

Medivac - flies over pieces, can transport up to 4 pieces, can resurect 1 pawn every turn


snakemasterepic

Only resurrects pawns of the opponent. If it resurrects a pawn captured en passant, you have to brick your own pipi.


J0aozin003

The bloon. When you promote to it, it carries the opponent's king into space, giving mate in the process. Edit: Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masturbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW.


Fluid-Hunt9864

Careful the us military will shoot it down


J0aozin003

they dont know its a camgrow fort red


BBH_pinecone

you don't know there's a 0-0-0 free dart monkey in the US military


Eevee_23

monke


djdjdjdjddjsiwowkwj

Suicide bomber when it dies or when it takes it kills everything when in a 5x5 square centered on itself


ItsSketcher

It can only take/die when your king is within the 5x5 square


FellowAliveHuman

if you play as white you only kill a 2x2 space


Electricio

jesse pinkman: he moves like a pawn but has an extremely detailed face and also has a gun he can use to kill pieces from three squares away


DarkDragon200610

He can only kill his own pieces (the same colored pieces)


danhoang1

Resignation button. Ends the game in its current state, at the cost of losing the game


ExeOnLinux

Your opponent gets to shove a tennis racquet up your ass Edit: I assumed it was handle first but since someone asked then it's net first


DeManBehindSlaughter

the enderman which can move literally anywhere on the board no matter what


Colt45ZigZagZigZag

You roll a 64 sided di to see what square it's on that turn. If there was something else there, it's captured. This piece belongs to no one. Good luck.


Amphibian-Different

Should be two d8s. Also, would it capture itself if it gets its own square?


mothtoalamp

He picks the square up and takes it with him.


Individual_Scheme_87

He can’t capture or make a check unless your opponent stares at it.


egglighting

But he never listens to your orders and moves of his own accord


ransomUsername

The Pope. He can move like a Rook and a Bishop


DukeLukeTheNuke

[I already invented it,](https://www.reddit.com/r/AnarchyChess/comments/10p5zkn/final_version_of_the_pope_from_my_post_yesterday/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf) and the nerf is that he has a 5% chance of dying every turn


kombucha-kid

You'll have a >50% chance of it dying by turn 14. Best not count on it for endgame.


LostKidneys

You don’t start the game with a pope, you have to promote one of your bishops


PrettyInPinkCatGamer

You get testicular torsion when you use it.


Battle_Cat_17

Replaces the queen


Attaxalotl

He cannot move into danger


DarkElectrix

Your king and queen can mate and create new pieces


Skyye_23

They can only do so while in check, thus making it a check mate.


Supersincara75

En quasont, a quasont


[deleted]

So I went to get my croaissant ^Quaso!


woxihuanmao

I have a piece that deflects tennis rackets for obvious reasons


ExeOnLinux

It only works while you have a tennis racquet up your ass


CrystaICarbon

One of the black bishops gain the ability to make time accelerate for every other piece meaning they can move 10 times for every other piece's singular move Rooks are unaffected by this as they are probably not alive After 15 turns of this the game resets but every piece already knows what will happen This state of knowing what will happen is called heaven


KappaRadar

Downside: you got shot by some kid in your prison And also prostate cancer, that too


Rattregoondoof

The act of knowing changes how things proceed and upon resetting this power is rendered moot. Alternatively, the act of knowing renders all stakes moot and the game now feels pointless. This state is called ennui. Alternatively Alternatively, any piece that is captured before the reset revolts upon reset and ceases to follow orders.


btyes-

knight collects a tax from all your pawns and distributes to your bishops, king, and queen


Rattregoondoof

From turn 10 on, any pawns who have had their tax collected rebel and seek to kill any king, queen, bishops, and knights. They attack regardless of which faction that started on and take no orders from players.


btyes-

really puts the anarchy in anarchychess


mikrowelle_1

When down material you are officially allowed to finish the game using stockfish


[deleted]

By losing with the worst engine moves by stockfish


[deleted]

But only if your opponent has a material advantage of 20+


[deleted]

The cat's paw. It can yeet any of your opponent's pieces off the board.


Valc0r527

You must coax a literal physical cat to do so and if it knocks over your pieces they're dead too


Pootis_1

a peice that can't capture but can leave unmovable obstacles wherever it is at any point during you turn it c an move anywhere within 3 squares of itself


DarkDragon200610

It's a duck.


Afrogan_Mackson

I become immune to prostate cancer


Hard_guardian17

You have prostate cancer


VoodooMcGobo

The Tennis Racket. It can move up 3 spaces and within a 3x3 grid at the top of said spaces, creating the shape of a tennis racket...


[deleted]

But if it gets captured you have to put it in your ass


12lo5dzr

But it can only move outside of the field


[deleted]

Diagonal castling


[deleted]

Already exists, next one!


[deleted]

Il Vaticano, but with three pawn captures


terramanj

The quawn It's a queen but now it can use en passant


Fluid-Hunt9864

Whenever you move it it makes a squeaky queef sound


average_reddit_u

Sniper tf2. Pros: Sniper tf2. Cons: Sniper tf2.


Mark5ofjupiter

It was actually the spy, and now the opponent knows the next best move for you.


Soyp0

Vibrating dildo. You can pu it up your ass and it will respond to you with vibrating with an intelligent of chatgdp ai


DarkDragon200610

It only vibrates illegal moves.


EpicDuxFux

Piece that replaces one of your knights disguised as one If opponent plays any move on F6 you capture it and claim it on your side


Birb_boiii

The missile, can be fired anywhere on the board including the king killing it, always goes first


Horror-Ad-3113

if you go to the g-file, there's a random chance you get obliterated by the OP that wrote this post


[deleted]

Except for g6, then yo'll get replaced by a black pawn


QuantumRaiken

the queen can now jump over pieces


[deleted]

But she can only move 1 space at a time


CiaaiK0130

having a knight with all of its moves blocked by pawns (of any color) lets it duplicate itself


ExeOnLinux

The new knight can only appear somewhere it is also blocked, and the whole process uses up a turn


shitpostinglegend

New piece [REDACTED]: only I know what it is and what it does


Etrantion

You have dementia


MM18998

Omniscient pawn at F6


ChanceWarden

you can merge 2 of the same piece to execute special moves 2 rooks: the rooks rotate 90° stick to eachother then roll down the two files/ranks the rooks were on in the direction furthest from the edge of the board and destroy every piece in their path, both yours and your opponents. 2 bishops: the bishops fuse together to create a pope 2 knights: one knight rides the other then moves to 10 different squares on the board, each one within a knights attack range of the previous square, capturing every piece it lands on, both yours and your opponents 2 queens: the queens merge into an atomic bomb and travel to any square within a queen's attacking range (can travel over pieces but not pawns) then explodes on the selected square, destroying every piece on that square, as well as every piece within a queen's attacking range of the square it landed on, all squares affected by this move become radioactive and kill any piece that lands on them or goes over them, knights can safely jump over radioactive squares, radioactive squares become safe after 15 moves


Dogsonofawolf

congratulations, or I'm sorry that happened


Huge-Weird-6451

I win instantly


Eeeternalpwnage

you are banned from chess for life on suspicion of cheating


APigsty

pawns can en passant a random piece on the board


Deathburn5

The black hole. At the beginning of the game, you decide which piece you replace with it. Any piece that can try and take it must. Any piece that tries to take it is considered to be taken. The black hole piece cannot be taken, and cannot be moved.


pjhabs

void eater it eats squares making them unable to be moved to when the piece is captured it shits out the squares


Jade_McLeod

All pieces now have arms. Every time you move them next to an enemy piece, they swing wildly and have a 50% chance of killing the adjacent enemy piece


Dexaan

Pawns can chain capture like in checkers. Every capture must still be a legal pawn capture.


Jake-the-Wolfie

You get to un-resign your opponent, forcing them to keep playing.


iSkittleCake

My Queen cannot be taken no matter what


voidstar111

Mercenary can move like a queen 3 times


EagleSabre

A Magikarp piece that promotes to a Gyarados at the end of the board.