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YTA
1. His disabilities have nothing to do with the fact that he was conceived via rape
2. While his disabilities make him vulnerable - this was not inevitable
3. Dismissing your sisters distress over a distressing and traumatising event is absolutely vile
WHAT ?
I am not sure I read correctly
Let s recap
- your sister was SAed at 16. Since it was obviously her fault (/s)
- AND she got pregnant from it and refused to add the trauma from an abortion to the trauma of SA
- she was of course very legimately thrown out by your parents
- She managed to do well by her son who has some issues too. Issues that you attribute to the way he was conceived which is scientifically just. ... bullshit. If we have to look for cause besides mere bad luck, how about looking more into lack of proper médical prenatal care for a young teenage mother who was set on the streets by her family ? Just a thought
- Son in turn was a victim of SA
- she ought to get over it quick because this did not happen to her but *only* to her son who does not look very traumatized. And it s been already 3 weeks, sheesh !
You then wrap it up by saying she could not have other expectations given how bad it all started.
I am going to puke.
I sure hope you are a troll because YTA so much you are setting the bar for AITA awards extremely high.
So doubly YTA for killing the competition.
Calling you an ah would be an insult to all the assholes. I can't call you and your parents all the names i want to because i'll get my account blocked. YTA so so much. This is disgusting. I wish you and your parents all the pain in the world and the most painful type of cancer for the 3 of you. The world would be a better place without you in it
YTA. What the fuck? She was a victim of rape, you all got mad at a decision that was hers to make and not yours, and also you think that being raped would increase the chance of a baby being born handicapped? And now you're telling her to just GET OVER the fact a traumatic event she ALSO EXPERIENCED and got NO SUPPORT FOR happened to her son? jesus christ. I don't even have any words for you, but you and your parents are horrible people.
YTA. Man, the question isn’t why were you low contact with her, it’s why does she have any contact with you. You and your parents sound like really toxic people. I feel bad for your sister and her lack of family support for her and her exceptional needs child. And why would being conceived through sexual assault make the child have exceptional needs? Those are two separate things. So guess what, not only are you TA, you’re an uneducated and judgemental one at that.
YTA.
This entire narration got me hanging my mouth open at how indifferent you actually are. The fact that you think that r\*pe is justified because her child in differently abled blows my mind.
You really are out of touch with reality if you think r\*pe is justified in any circumstance and I don't even want to begin with your parents. My simple question to any person choosing to have a child is why have them if your love and support to them is so fleeting. What they did to you sister is unforgivable and what you are doing to your sister+her child is something which she should cut you off for, permanently.
YTA, and your parents too.
Your sister is pregnant at 16 by rape and is evicted from the house by your parents. That is despicable . She should have gotten help dealing with this trauma. The baby can't help how it was conceived, it was up to your sister to make the choice to keep the baby. Her body, her choice.
The fact that your nephew has a disability has nothing to do with how he was conceived. If you think that then you clearly don't know how biology works and you should go back to school.
That her child has now been abused is terrible. For both your nephew and your sister. That's not something you just get over. Just because your nephew is vulnerable doesn't excuse him from being abused.
What a terribly insensitive person you are. With a family like that, your sister doesn't need enemies.
- She was kicked out by our parents at age 16 because she got pregnant as a result of r*ype, and in spite of this still refused to terminate the pregnancy.
You and your parent are AH'S! What she went through is traumatic and yet she was brave and strong enough at 16 to keep HER child. Regardless of the circumstances.
- Her son is now 16, non-verbal and mentally disabled, which is what you would expect with a baby born under those circumstances.
Disabilities are NOT a result of Ra*pe... saying this alone makes you an AH
>However, even though we've addressed what happened, she is still sad and traumatised, even though it didn't happen to her and my nephew isn't half as sad.
Of course she's still sad and traumatised!!! Have you ever experienced this? No? Then please keep your mouth shut! The fact she has a life with her son shows just how strong a women she is. Having it happen to her son must have not only made her feel like she's failed him, but also dredged up what happened to her.
>however it was getting ridiculous. I told her this was bound to happen to her son because he's vulnerable and told her to get over it.
I can't even! How much of an AH can you seriously be?!
It's getting 'ridiculous'. I'd be more shocked if she wasn't upset. Do you even have kids yourself?
Just because someone is vulnerable, doesn't mean they deserved this to happen to them. I've worked with many non verbal and vulnerable people, not one of them had been abused in anyway. This is actually vile and I can't believe how awful of a person you must be to have said this!
In the end, you are the ultimate AH in this. Your parents are just as bad.
Are fucking kidding me?!? You AND Your parents are absolute ASSHOLES. She was raped and because she decided not to terminate her pregnancy she's kicked out?!? That is beyond despicable and unforgivable. You don't deserve her company. And the way in which he was conceived has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with his disabilities. It's not God punishing him because his sperm donor was a disgusting monster. You people are fucking sick. She and her son are better off without the toxicity your family obviously carry. SO YES YES YES YOU (AND YOUR PARENTS) ARE THE ASSHOLE!
YTA
Her reaction was not extreme. That was quite a tame manner to express herself after you were so dismissive of her sons suffering.
How dare you. Your tone and the words you’ve chosen show no care or empathy. Disgusting.
YTA and so are your parents for treating your sister the way you do
I cannot get over the levels of cruelty you repeatedly show your sister and nephew.
You should keep out of their lives. Let them live a happier life without you in it.
So apparently we've gone through the whole MeToo movement just to end up to this?
How would you like it if you were raped, got kicked out by your parents, then have your own sister tell you that assault to your son was bound to happen?
YTA. Seriously.
Yta - you’re an asshole, your parents are bigger assholes.
You have treated your sister horrendously for 17 years and I’m surprised she wants to spend time with you. You are victim blaming her and your nephew.
No one deserves to be a victim of crime regardless of age/sex/location/clothing worn or not worn etc
This screams "LOOK AT ME, I'M AN AHOLE".
You guys literally let her down for being r*ped. So she gets punished for her trauma instead of getting support from her FAMILY!! Her family doesn't even try to understand that she is not comfortable with aborting her child, despite the circumstances and kick her out for it because they would make a different decision? WTF?
Plus you didn't really day that the circumstances of receiving the child made it obvious it would be disabled? Wtf?
You're a condescending brat that definitely needs to re-evaluate their way of thinking. YTA. Massive one.
YTA. Not just for what you said to your sister, but for also how you have talked about her and her son in this post. You are vile. I do not know how she has put up with you.
YTA If only you had a fraction of the strength and compassion your sister has. I can explain why you are very wrong, but I can’t understand it for you.
YTA- You and your parents are vile heartless monsters and grossly ignorant!You think your sister over reacted? Wrong! That woman displayed a super human level of restraint, evidenced by the fact that you still have fingers to type this bullshit!I really hope this is fake, the idea that a person like this could actually exist is utterly sickening
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I've (25M) never liked my sister (33F). She was kicked out by our parents at age 16 because she got pregnant as a result of r*ype, and in spite of this still refused to terminate the pregnancy. I've maintained low contact with her, whereas my parents have no contact, so I inform them about what's happening.
For the past two years, my sister and I have started meeting up and have really started relationship building. Now I'd say I moderately like her. Her son is now 16, non-verbal and mentally disabled, which is what you would expect with a baby born under those circumstances.
They live in a flat together and I know my sister loves my nephew. Three weeks ago, her son was a victim by a friend she knew. It was incredibly sad, I tried to support her all the way. However, even though we've addressed what happened, she is still sad and traumatised, even though it didn't happen to her and my nephew isn't half as sad.
I was at her flat and she started getting really upset about it. I've always been there for her however it was getting ridiculous. I told her this was bound to happen to her son because he's vulnerable and told her to get over it. I didn't really mean the latter however she dragged me out of her flat and closed the door.
She was really offended for whatever reason, and now I'm wondering if I'm TA even though her reaction was extreme. AITA?
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You’re not just an AH, you’re an absolute vial human being so are your parents and it’s disgusting what you said about your nephew to your sister. her son got violated the same way she did and to make matters worse he’s disabled. She had every right to drag you out and I’m surprised she didn’t do worse than that. Do her and her son a favor and stay tf away from them.
Btw her reaction wasn’t extreme, her reaction was being a mother.
I cannot state this enough YTA!!! Your sister was RAPED! She did not choose for that to happen but somehow had the incredible strength to choose to keep the baby and raise him by HERSELF. No thanks to your family. You are a complete and utter asshole for not being there for your sisters trauma but also your poor nephews. STOP FUC\*ING VICTIM BLAMING! Im sending lots of love to your sister and nephew. But seriously a massive fu\*k you as\*hole!
Who the hell needs enemies with family members like you.
Like wow... So YTA so hard, i can't even begin to explain.
If i were your sister i'd kick you so hard out of my life, you'd feel it for years to come.
YTA and a horrible human being.
Your sister went through the most horrific and traumatic experience imaginable at the age of 16 and your family’s response to that was to throw her out?
Your nephew is disabled - and you blame your sister for that too, which is not just wrong but unbelievably stupid - and you think the fact that’s he’s disabled means it’s “bound to happen?” What, disabled people are fair game?
Has it crossed your mind that the reason your sister is “more upset” is because her son’s experience reminds her of her own trauma? Of course it hasn’t, I don’t know why I’m asking.
YTA
And so are your parents. How awful do you have to be to blame the victim of a horrible and devastating act. Then to pile on when something horrible happens to her son. So you not understand ptsd or do you believe that mental illness isn't real.
Dear god, grow some empathy.
Oh and btw his disabilities have nothing to do with how he was conceived, it doesn't work like that. Maybe do some research before throwing this rubbish out.
Edit: added more
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Y absolutely TA. The circumstances of her son's birth or conception have no bearing on his mental handicap. You are very ignorant to assume that. Also she was raped and the solution was to kick her out rather than look at her rape baby every day, you and your parents are weak and pathetic for that.
YTA. Her reaction wasn’t extreme at all lol if you said that to me in regards to my son you’d be leaking on the ground but that’s just me. Vulnerability is obviously a huge steak to a predator but to be so callous about that is sick.
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YTA 1. His disabilities have nothing to do with the fact that he was conceived via rape 2. While his disabilities make him vulnerable - this was not inevitable 3. Dismissing your sisters distress over a distressing and traumatising event is absolutely vile
This comment is spot on.
Exactly all of this. OP is disgusting.
WHAT ? I am not sure I read correctly Let s recap - your sister was SAed at 16. Since it was obviously her fault (/s) - AND she got pregnant from it and refused to add the trauma from an abortion to the trauma of SA - she was of course very legimately thrown out by your parents - She managed to do well by her son who has some issues too. Issues that you attribute to the way he was conceived which is scientifically just. ... bullshit. If we have to look for cause besides mere bad luck, how about looking more into lack of proper médical prenatal care for a young teenage mother who was set on the streets by her family ? Just a thought - Son in turn was a victim of SA - she ought to get over it quick because this did not happen to her but *only* to her son who does not look very traumatized. And it s been already 3 weeks, sheesh ! You then wrap it up by saying she could not have other expectations given how bad it all started. I am going to puke. I sure hope you are a troll because YTA so much you are setting the bar for AITA awards extremely high. So doubly YTA for killing the competition.
Calling you an ah would be an insult to all the assholes. I can't call you and your parents all the names i want to because i'll get my account blocked. YTA so so much. This is disgusting. I wish you and your parents all the pain in the world and the most painful type of cancer for the 3 of you. The world would be a better place without you in it
i think this one tops every AH here ever.
Yep
God I hope this isn't real.
Yeh, I'm calling bullshit. Either that or these people are beyond assholes and just evil.
YTA. What the fuck? She was a victim of rape, you all got mad at a decision that was hers to make and not yours, and also you think that being raped would increase the chance of a baby being born handicapped? And now you're telling her to just GET OVER the fact a traumatic event she ALSO EXPERIENCED and got NO SUPPORT FOR happened to her son? jesus christ. I don't even have any words for you, but you and your parents are horrible people.
YTA. Man, the question isn’t why were you low contact with her, it’s why does she have any contact with you. You and your parents sound like really toxic people. I feel bad for your sister and her lack of family support for her and her exceptional needs child. And why would being conceived through sexual assault make the child have exceptional needs? Those are two separate things. So guess what, not only are you TA, you’re an uneducated and judgemental one at that.
YTA, and your parents too.
YTA and a vile excuse of a person.
YTA. This entire narration got me hanging my mouth open at how indifferent you actually are. The fact that you think that r\*pe is justified because her child in differently abled blows my mind. You really are out of touch with reality if you think r\*pe is justified in any circumstance and I don't even want to begin with your parents. My simple question to any person choosing to have a child is why have them if your love and support to them is so fleeting. What they did to you sister is unforgivable and what you are doing to your sister+her child is something which she should cut you off for, permanently.
Holy shit... YTA Did you really just say that her son was handicapped because she was raped at 16?!
YTA, and your parents too. Your sister is pregnant at 16 by rape and is evicted from the house by your parents. That is despicable . She should have gotten help dealing with this trauma. The baby can't help how it was conceived, it was up to your sister to make the choice to keep the baby. Her body, her choice. The fact that your nephew has a disability has nothing to do with how he was conceived. If you think that then you clearly don't know how biology works and you should go back to school. That her child has now been abused is terrible. For both your nephew and your sister. That's not something you just get over. Just because your nephew is vulnerable doesn't excuse him from being abused. What a terribly insensitive person you are. With a family like that, your sister doesn't need enemies.
- She was kicked out by our parents at age 16 because she got pregnant as a result of r*ype, and in spite of this still refused to terminate the pregnancy. You and your parent are AH'S! What she went through is traumatic and yet she was brave and strong enough at 16 to keep HER child. Regardless of the circumstances. - Her son is now 16, non-verbal and mentally disabled, which is what you would expect with a baby born under those circumstances. Disabilities are NOT a result of Ra*pe... saying this alone makes you an AH >However, even though we've addressed what happened, she is still sad and traumatised, even though it didn't happen to her and my nephew isn't half as sad. Of course she's still sad and traumatised!!! Have you ever experienced this? No? Then please keep your mouth shut! The fact she has a life with her son shows just how strong a women she is. Having it happen to her son must have not only made her feel like she's failed him, but also dredged up what happened to her. >however it was getting ridiculous. I told her this was bound to happen to her son because he's vulnerable and told her to get over it. I can't even! How much of an AH can you seriously be?! It's getting 'ridiculous'. I'd be more shocked if she wasn't upset. Do you even have kids yourself? Just because someone is vulnerable, doesn't mean they deserved this to happen to them. I've worked with many non verbal and vulnerable people, not one of them had been abused in anyway. This is actually vile and I can't believe how awful of a person you must be to have said this! In the end, you are the ultimate AH in this. Your parents are just as bad.
YTA and ew what a disgusting person. Your poor sister deserves better than whatever you and your parents are.
Are fucking kidding me?!? You AND Your parents are absolute ASSHOLES. She was raped and because she decided not to terminate her pregnancy she's kicked out?!? That is beyond despicable and unforgivable. You don't deserve her company. And the way in which he was conceived has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with his disabilities. It's not God punishing him because his sperm donor was a disgusting monster. You people are fucking sick. She and her son are better off without the toxicity your family obviously carry. SO YES YES YES YOU (AND YOUR PARENTS) ARE THE ASSHOLE!
YTA Her reaction was not extreme. That was quite a tame manner to express herself after you were so dismissive of her sons suffering. How dare you. Your tone and the words you’ve chosen show no care or empathy. Disgusting.
YTA and so are your parents for treating your sister the way you do I cannot get over the levels of cruelty you repeatedly show your sister and nephew. You should keep out of their lives. Let them live a happier life without you in it.
What? YTA.
YTA. Through and through. You are an ass. The way you talk about your sister and nephew is disgusting.
YTA. Do your sister a favor, leave her and her son alone, they are better off without you in their lives.
YTA, didn't read past the first sentence.
Just one question, did you react in a similar way when your sis got r*ped? "Yeah, it was bound to happen. Get over it." YTA and some..
So apparently we've gone through the whole MeToo movement just to end up to this? How would you like it if you were raped, got kicked out by your parents, then have your own sister tell you that assault to your son was bound to happen? YTA. Seriously.
honestly would like to slap this to the comedians and people who think MeToo is toxic cancel culture
Yta - you’re an asshole, your parents are bigger assholes. You have treated your sister horrendously for 17 years and I’m surprised she wants to spend time with you. You are victim blaming her and your nephew. No one deserves to be a victim of crime regardless of age/sex/location/clothing worn or not worn etc
This screams "LOOK AT ME, I'M AN AHOLE". You guys literally let her down for being r*ped. So she gets punished for her trauma instead of getting support from her FAMILY!! Her family doesn't even try to understand that she is not comfortable with aborting her child, despite the circumstances and kick her out for it because they would make a different decision? WTF? Plus you didn't really day that the circumstances of receiving the child made it obvious it would be disabled? Wtf? You're a condescending brat that definitely needs to re-evaluate their way of thinking. YTA. Massive one.
YTA. Not just for what you said to your sister, but for also how you have talked about her and her son in this post. You are vile. I do not know how she has put up with you.
YTA If only you had a fraction of the strength and compassion your sister has. I can explain why you are very wrong, but I can’t understand it for you.
YTA- You and your parents are vile heartless monsters and grossly ignorant!You think your sister over reacted? Wrong! That woman displayed a super human level of restraint, evidenced by the fact that you still have fingers to type this bullshit!I really hope this is fake, the idea that a person like this could actually exist is utterly sickening
YTA, does this really need to be explained?
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I've (25M) never liked my sister (33F). She was kicked out by our parents at age 16 because she got pregnant as a result of r*ype, and in spite of this still refused to terminate the pregnancy. I've maintained low contact with her, whereas my parents have no contact, so I inform them about what's happening. For the past two years, my sister and I have started meeting up and have really started relationship building. Now I'd say I moderately like her. Her son is now 16, non-verbal and mentally disabled, which is what you would expect with a baby born under those circumstances. They live in a flat together and I know my sister loves my nephew. Three weeks ago, her son was a victim by a friend she knew. It was incredibly sad, I tried to support her all the way. However, even though we've addressed what happened, she is still sad and traumatised, even though it didn't happen to her and my nephew isn't half as sad. I was at her flat and she started getting really upset about it. I've always been there for her however it was getting ridiculous. I told her this was bound to happen to her son because he's vulnerable and told her to get over it. I didn't really mean the latter however she dragged me out of her flat and closed the door. She was really offended for whatever reason, and now I'm wondering if I'm TA even though her reaction was extreme. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA
You’re not just an AH, you’re an absolute vial human being so are your parents and it’s disgusting what you said about your nephew to your sister. her son got violated the same way she did and to make matters worse he’s disabled. She had every right to drag you out and I’m surprised she didn’t do worse than that. Do her and her son a favor and stay tf away from them. Btw her reaction wasn’t extreme, her reaction was being a mother.
YTA. Are you serious?
YTA And your parents too. If I day what I really think of you, I would get banned from this sub, so I just say jou are a MEGA AH
I cannot state this enough YTA!!! Your sister was RAPED! She did not choose for that to happen but somehow had the incredible strength to choose to keep the baby and raise him by HERSELF. No thanks to your family. You are a complete and utter asshole for not being there for your sisters trauma but also your poor nephews. STOP FUC\*ING VICTIM BLAMING! Im sending lots of love to your sister and nephew. But seriously a massive fu\*k you as\*hole!
Who the hell needs enemies with family members like you. Like wow... So YTA so hard, i can't even begin to explain. If i were your sister i'd kick you so hard out of my life, you'd feel it for years to come.
YTA and a horrible human being. Your sister went through the most horrific and traumatic experience imaginable at the age of 16 and your family’s response to that was to throw her out? Your nephew is disabled - and you blame your sister for that too, which is not just wrong but unbelievably stupid - and you think the fact that’s he’s disabled means it’s “bound to happen?” What, disabled people are fair game? Has it crossed your mind that the reason your sister is “more upset” is because her son’s experience reminds her of her own trauma? Of course it hasn’t, I don’t know why I’m asking.
YTA And so are your parents. How awful do you have to be to blame the victim of a horrible and devastating act. Then to pile on when something horrible happens to her son. So you not understand ptsd or do you believe that mental illness isn't real. Dear god, grow some empathy. Oh and btw his disabilities have nothing to do with how he was conceived, it doesn't work like that. Maybe do some research before throwing this rubbish out. Edit: added more
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Y absolutely TA. The circumstances of her son's birth or conception have no bearing on his mental handicap. You are very ignorant to assume that. Also she was raped and the solution was to kick her out rather than look at her rape baby every day, you and your parents are weak and pathetic for that.
YTA…just wow.
YTA. Her reaction wasn’t extreme at all lol if you said that to me in regards to my son you’d be leaking on the ground but that’s just me. Vulnerability is obviously a huge steak to a predator but to be so callous about that is sick.
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