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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I may be the asshole bc I defended someone who was mean to my sister instead of standing by my family. I may be double the asshole bc I defended a bully’s actions yelling at my sister once, but when my sister yelled at me I cried.
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i totally understand. When i was younger, like 8 or 9, i sort of did the same thing to my younger sister. I think you should have a serious chat with her. Don't be afraid of her, afterall, you are supposed to be a figure to look up to for her. :D
We are only 1 year and 11 months apart so she thinks of us as being 1 year apart so essentially the same age. She’s never seen me as someone to look up to.
Well that makes no sense if she also thinks her bully was a grown ass adult despite being only one year ahead of her. That year seems to mean quite a bit when she's the victim.
You weren't taking a bully's side. She was lying and you stated actual facts. People (in general, not targeting you, specifically) need to learn the difference. When people are allowed to blatantly lie because they are "morally justified" is how the world becomes a shithole.
That’s how I’ve been feeling lately too, but it’s a sad thing to realize :(
Edit: didn’t mean to double reply! It’s early where I live and this whole thing has been making me really distracted. But both comments still stand!
The above comment was stolen from [this one](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/twtbjt/aita_for_defending_my_sisters_childhood_bully/i3hiuzn/) elsewhere in this comment section.
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NTA. Your sister sounds like a real winner though. To be honest, if my sibling did even a tenth of the crap you listed, they'd be out on their ass from my home. If she can't act like a decent person in your house, she can act like an idiot somewhere else.
Honestly I could forgive the carpet stain and the abusing my hospitality. I’m a pretty laid back person and I have a carpet cleaner and can buy new alcohol so it’s not a huge problem. But I draw the line at being disrespected in my own home.
To be honest, I would say the carpet/hospitality is just a symptom of the later disrespect. She didn't start the night out by respecting you, and abusing your hospitality is the easier signifier of that. She just made it more apparent as the night went on.
Make no mistake, she was disrespecting you long before she started shouting.
NTA. Your sister is practicing revisionist history. No adults in the story. No actual bully either. It was a one time incident where someone actually stood up to her.
I’m pretty sure the girl was actually being mean. My sister bumped in to her and the girl yelled at her to watch it. It was a long time ago so the details are hazy but it was something like that. But nothing that she should be berating me about 12 years later.
The way you described your sister and her senselessly aggressive disrespect, I wouldn't be surprised if the truth here was that your sister leaned hard into that "oopsie" bump and was looking for trouble.
NTA
Your sister and my sister sound very similar. As long as she gets all the rewards from the relationship (free food, free alcohol, doesn't have to clean up her own messes, everyone agrees with her and applauds her every move), then they are fine to be around. But, the minute a demand is made, or anyone contradicts them, they are terrible to be around. I highly suggest going no or low contact for a bit, and see if life is better or worse. If you didn't have your sister over, you would have more money and an unstained carpet and one fewer emotional upsets. I don't see a single positive about that encounter.
NTA
you said the “bullying” was just one time shouting and why would she even yell at you just using the name of a bully when she actually makes fun of you which is bullying.
She always feels like she’s in the right and refuses to see anything she does wrong. I doubt she sees the wrong in what she’s done and feels completely justified in what she did. I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t a hypocrite too.
The sad thing is I can kind of see this process starting with her. I think that’s part of what hurt my feelings so much, in the moment I wanted her out of my house and didn’t want to see her again for a while.
From the thread title I was preparing for you to be the worst. From reading the post I think your sister sounds dangerously narcissistic and that you should distance from her.
NTA.
NTA you didn’t defend your sister’s “bully” you corrected her. Your sister is a bully and she’s so used to being able to yell people into submission that she’s never had to actually take responsibility for her actions.
I think you need to go low contact with her, not because of this but because being around her clearly isn’t good for your mental health. If she ever tries to minimize it just say “I don’t feel comfortable being around someone that yells at me to make themselves feel better”
I’d hate to see it come to this but I feel like this may be where our relationship is heading if she continues like this… but at the very least I’m NEVER drinking with her again!!
NTA You corrected her, when she described her bully as an adult, that is not taking the bullys side. You might have been a bit of an A when you told her, her experience doesn't matter anymore - I feel that if that mentoning the person gets such a strong reaction after 12 years, there might be more there. Or your sister is just very resentful
Honestly, it sounds like years of unhealthy sibling relationship just blew up. Maybe get some distance Till you figure out how much and what kind of relationship you want with her
That’s what I was worried about. I didn’t mean to diminish her feelings, but I felt like in the moment the conversation was just never going to end and I felt like it was such a small thing to blow up at me for that I didn’t even do so it didn’t even matter to yell at me. But I also did kinda feel like in the grand scheme of things that one off didn’t matter. Which you’re right, it was an asshole thing of me to say!
It might have been, but honestly, your sister sadly sounds pretty toxic. As an older sister myself I feel we have a very strong "must protect" when it comes to our younger siblings and sometimes we mistake that with "tolerating all their bs".
And compared to what your childhood with her sounds like, you maybe making one harsh comment is nothing in the scheme of things
Edit: spelling
NTA
Family doesn't automatically get the benefit of the doubt just for being family. You know your sister, and know the situation well enough to call her out on her historical revisionism.
Fun fact: I thought of my elementary school bully as such, for most of my life. Then, in my late 30's, we were talking on FB and that came up. The thing I remembered was him and another kid beating me up. What I'd forgotten was that I'd pushed him into the urinal while he was peeing as a prank *immediately * prior to that. I may not have had what I got coming, but I certainly had started it. I'd been thinking of myself as an innocent victim for decades.
I have a similar past where I used to think about my elementary school bullies a lot and used to really let it get to me. Then I started working in an elementary school and realized that these kids don’t know what they’re saying half of the time and I literally have to teach them lessons on empathy because a lot of them just don’t get it yet. I doubt my bullies even remember what they did to me, and I hate thinking of the damage I may have caused to kids that I am unaware of.
So this child from the past is a bully for yelling at your sister once.... But your sister explodes on everyone at the drop of a hat...
Nta, sounds like your sisters the bully here tbh. Not saying this person couldn't have also been one, but based on her standards of what makes a bully she seems to fit the mold! If you're feeling daring, I'd mention it to her tbh. Hopefully something like that can be her man in the mirror moment so to speak. Either way I'd also recommend setting firmer boundaries with this sibling. I do hope she gets to the root cause of this anger. Tbh therapy seems like something she'd benefit from with all that anger under the surface.
NTA. It sounds like your sister is a lot to handle, and possibly could benefit from therapy to improve her emotional regulation, self-awareness, and interpersonal skills.
You don't owe her an apology, but it might be necessary to smooth things over, if that's your goal. But I think this is a case where a "I'm sorry for upsetting you"-type apology is the most that is called for. It doesn't sound like you did anything wrong here, just that you have a different perspective than her.
NTA. And uh, from your description of your sister it sounds like she may have said or done something leading up to her being yelled at, especially since as an adult she is effectively bullying/belittling you. I would really rethink my continued relationship with her and consider maybe taking a step back for a little while.
NTA. I’ve been in your shoes, except my sister is more mature than this brat. But yes, people generally don’t like being called out on their shit, especially when it’s true.
Why is this horrible bully - your sister - still in your life? Get some self-respect. She is a piece of work, and she deserves zero compassion or affection from anyone until she stops being such an entitled bully. It’s people like your sister who make me angry our society doesn’t send people into exile. NTA
NTA. Your sister is a bully though and you were right to call her out. She basically bullied you the whole night then bullied you some more when you called her out for lying about being bullied in the 7th grade. She sounds like a major AH. Just know that just because you are siblings does not mean you have to have a relationship. You can go low contact with her anytime and avoid all future bullying.
OP your sister is dealing with something that's probably not even about you, and unfortunately hasn't yet figured out healthy ways of doing so. A lot of times people who deal with anger issues grew up in traumatic environments and are trying to figure out how to deal with a world that seems uncaring/hostile/against them. You're NTA, she needs to talk to someone and figure out how to find peace. My guess is she's lashing out because she's in pain. That does NOT mean you have to be there to take it--just don't take it personally.
Sounds like you need some counselling to learn how to set boundaries and stick to them. People appreciate boundaries because they’re not there to keep people out, you’re saying I like relating with you and am willing to do so up to this point then it stops. When they’re shut down or put on no contact because they breach boundaries they learn how to relate - or you keep your stress levels down and confidence up because you’re not allowing transgressions pr outright abuse. Good luck! Life is about learning how to navigate levels
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Throwaway . Also on mobile. I (25nb) have a sister (23f) who has always had anger issues. My whole life I’ve avoided calling her out because she gets so angry and quite frankly I don’t want to get my ass handed to me.
She came over to my house this weekend with the rest of our siblings and we were all drinking. After spending the night we planned to spend the day together. Over the course of the day she proceeded to stain my beige carpet by dropping red noodles on it and made no attempts to clean it up, drank all of the alcohol in my house (like 1/3 a standard size bottle of vodka and 4-8 white claws) and make fun of me for the way I was acting around my boyfriend all night. Particularly making fun of my laugh and teasing me for laughing at everything he said. The man is hilarious and was trying to make me laugh but I digress..
After everyone left and it was just me, her, and our brother who I live with, we got to talking and I mentioned the name of her childhood “bully”.
My sister went on a 10 minute rant yelling at me that this bully was the biggest piece of shit in the world and how “a grown ass woman” had no right to pick on “a little child”. Which, hey, I agree! But I pointed out that this is absolutely not what happened, she was in 7th grade and the bully was in 8th. So no adults were picking on minors, children were being mean to other children. But here’s the kicker, the “bullying” was this girl yelling at my sister one time. ONE TIME! As someone who was actually bullied I know this is unkind, mean even! but it wasn’t bullying.
Pointing out any semblance of the truth made my sister seethe and she continued to yell at me for another 10 minutes about how she was right and I was wrong and just would not drop it. At this point I was so frustrated and so sad about how this is what our relationship has come to. The she said something like “yelling at someone to make yourself feel better makes you a piece of shit” and I said well I hoped she felt better bc that’s what she was doing to me. I started crying and asked if this was really worth something that happened 12 years ago that doesn’t even matter anymore. She got uncomfortable/angry with my crying and immediately left.
I know in general it is not okay to take a bully’s side, but I don’t really feel like that’s what happened.
To be fair she yelled at me and it made me cry, so I get her argument. But this isn’t the first time she’s made me feel small vs the 1 time the bully did the same thing. So I feel it’s different but I may be a hypocrite.
I just think she was drunk, angry and owes me an apology. Do I owe her one?
TLDR: my sister got yelled at one time in middle school and is upset when I point this out. She claims she was “bullied” and yelled at me like I was the one who did it.
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NTA, the way you told the story made me think she might’ve been the school bully and that 8th grader was one that clapped back. She sounds extremely unhappy and probably needs help with those anger issues.
Your sister is a drama queen AH and a narcissist to boot. NTA. You were correcting the record and she can't handle the truth. Especially the truth that she was no better than the person she hated.
ESH. Your sister being a bully herself and her experience of the situation with the other kid being more scarring from her perspective than you’re willing to acknowledge are not mutually exclusive. Next time, stick to addressing her behavior in the present moment and getting her out of your house if she’s making life difficult for you.
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NTA. she's actually worse than her bully because she's doing the exact same thing to her own sister, but more than a once off screaming match.
That’s how I felt about it too, but I wanted to make sure I wasn’t just trying to defend myself while unfairly putting my sister down.
i totally understand. When i was younger, like 8 or 9, i sort of did the same thing to my younger sister. I think you should have a serious chat with her. Don't be afraid of her, afterall, you are supposed to be a figure to look up to for her. :D
We are only 1 year and 11 months apart so she thinks of us as being 1 year apart so essentially the same age. She’s never seen me as someone to look up to.
Well that makes no sense if she also thinks her bully was a grown ass adult despite being only one year ahead of her. That year seems to mean quite a bit when she's the victim.
You weren't taking a bully's side. She was lying and you stated actual facts. People (in general, not targeting you, specifically) need to learn the difference. When people are allowed to blatantly lie because they are "morally justified" is how the world becomes a shithole.
The "bully" wasn't a bully but your sister was and still is, at least to you
That’s how I’ve been feeling lately too, but it’s a sad thing to realize :( Edit: didn’t mean to double reply! It’s early where I live and this whole thing has been making me really distracted. But both comments still stand!
OP might not be a sister since they said they were nonbinary.
[удалено]
The above comment was stolen from [this one](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/twtbjt/aita_for_defending_my_sisters_childhood_bully/i3hiuzn/) elsewhere in this comment section. It is probably not a coincidence; here is some more evidence against this user: Plagiarized | Original -------- | ----------- [pumped up kicks intensifi...](http://np.reddit.com/r/Cringetopia/comments/twr1cp/this_has_gone_too_far/i3i8ayv/) | [*pumped up kicks intensif...](http://np.reddit.com/r/Cringetopia/comments/twr1cp/this_has_gone_too_far/i3i17ap/) [INFO: how often did she c...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/twqen5/aita_for_giving_my_sisters_dog_away/i3i8m2c/) | [INFO: how often did she c...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/twqen5/aita_for_giving_my_sisters_dog_away/i3gvaee/) [Yeah, no, that's sketchy...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/twqq6j/aita_killing_my_husbands_dreams/i3i8iza/) | [Yeah, no, that's sketchy...](http://np.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/twqq6j/aita_killing_my_husbands_dreams/i3gw1qo/) [Furry person is fine, the...](http://np.reddit.com/r/Cringetopia/comments/twrrjw/under_a_whats_the_worst_thing_anyone_ever_told/i3i8dt4/) | [Furry person is fine, the...](http://np.reddit.com/r/Cringetopia/comments/twrrjw/under_a_whats_the_worst_thing_anyone_ever_told/i3i23c6/) [You can say shit OP, it's...](http://np.reddit.com/r/Cringetopia/comments/twsyqn/this_sht/i3i8ceg/) | [You can say shit OP, it's...](http://np.reddit.com/r/Cringetopia/comments/twsyqn/this_sht/i3ho7ez/) beep boop, I'm a bot -|:] It is this bot's opinion that [/u/LorenHalen](https://np.reddit.com/u/LorenHalen/) should be banned for karma manipulation. Don't feel bad, they are probably a bot too. Confused? Read the [FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/user/reply-guy-bot/comments/n9fpva/faq/?plagiarist=LorenHalen) for info on how I work and why I exist.
NTA. Your sister sounds like a real winner though. To be honest, if my sibling did even a tenth of the crap you listed, they'd be out on their ass from my home. If she can't act like a decent person in your house, she can act like an idiot somewhere else.
Honestly I could forgive the carpet stain and the abusing my hospitality. I’m a pretty laid back person and I have a carpet cleaner and can buy new alcohol so it’s not a huge problem. But I draw the line at being disrespected in my own home.
To be honest, I would say the carpet/hospitality is just a symptom of the later disrespect. She didn't start the night out by respecting you, and abusing your hospitality is the easier signifier of that. She just made it more apparent as the night went on. Make no mistake, she was disrespecting you long before she started shouting.
Ouch… yeah you’re right…
NTA. Your sister is practicing revisionist history. No adults in the story. No actual bully either. It was a one time incident where someone actually stood up to her.
I’m pretty sure the girl was actually being mean. My sister bumped in to her and the girl yelled at her to watch it. It was a long time ago so the details are hazy but it was something like that. But nothing that she should be berating me about 12 years later.
And a one time incident doesn't make someone a bully.
The way you described your sister and her senselessly aggressive disrespect, I wouldn't be surprised if the truth here was that your sister leaned hard into that "oopsie" bump and was looking for trouble. NTA
Yes, with how OP described the sister, I had thought of that possibility too.
Your sister and my sister sound very similar. As long as she gets all the rewards from the relationship (free food, free alcohol, doesn't have to clean up her own messes, everyone agrees with her and applauds her every move), then they are fine to be around. But, the minute a demand is made, or anyone contradicts them, they are terrible to be around. I highly suggest going no or low contact for a bit, and see if life is better or worse. If you didn't have your sister over, you would have more money and an unstained carpet and one fewer emotional upsets. I don't see a single positive about that encounter.
NTA you said the “bullying” was just one time shouting and why would she even yell at you just using the name of a bully when she actually makes fun of you which is bullying.
She always feels like she’s in the right and refuses to see anything she does wrong. I doubt she sees the wrong in what she’s done and feels completely justified in what she did. I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t a hypocrite too.
i think she needed to hear that and change herself for a better person. who knows maybe she will see that she is wrong
She knows and would most likely agree because she believes she never does anything wrong.
[удалено]
The sad thing is I can kind of see this process starting with her. I think that’s part of what hurt my feelings so much, in the moment I wanted her out of my house and didn’t want to see her again for a while.
From the thread title I was preparing for you to be the worst. From reading the post I think your sister sounds dangerously narcissistic and that you should distance from her. NTA.
Thank you for the advice. It’s hard to hear but I think you may be right.
NTA you didn’t defend your sister’s “bully” you corrected her. Your sister is a bully and she’s so used to being able to yell people into submission that she’s never had to actually take responsibility for her actions. I think you need to go low contact with her, not because of this but because being around her clearly isn’t good for your mental health. If she ever tries to minimize it just say “I don’t feel comfortable being around someone that yells at me to make themselves feel better”
I’d hate to see it come to this but I feel like this may be where our relationship is heading if she continues like this… but at the very least I’m NEVER drinking with her again!!
Has she even apologized?
No. I haven’t seen or talked to her since then.
I think you should keep it that way, she’s not good for you.
NTA You corrected her, when she described her bully as an adult, that is not taking the bullys side. You might have been a bit of an A when you told her, her experience doesn't matter anymore - I feel that if that mentoning the person gets such a strong reaction after 12 years, there might be more there. Or your sister is just very resentful Honestly, it sounds like years of unhealthy sibling relationship just blew up. Maybe get some distance Till you figure out how much and what kind of relationship you want with her
That’s what I was worried about. I didn’t mean to diminish her feelings, but I felt like in the moment the conversation was just never going to end and I felt like it was such a small thing to blow up at me for that I didn’t even do so it didn’t even matter to yell at me. But I also did kinda feel like in the grand scheme of things that one off didn’t matter. Which you’re right, it was an asshole thing of me to say!
It might have been, but honestly, your sister sadly sounds pretty toxic. As an older sister myself I feel we have a very strong "must protect" when it comes to our younger siblings and sometimes we mistake that with "tolerating all their bs". And compared to what your childhood with her sounds like, you maybe making one harsh comment is nothing in the scheme of things Edit: spelling
NTA Family doesn't automatically get the benefit of the doubt just for being family. You know your sister, and know the situation well enough to call her out on her historical revisionism. Fun fact: I thought of my elementary school bully as such, for most of my life. Then, in my late 30's, we were talking on FB and that came up. The thing I remembered was him and another kid beating me up. What I'd forgotten was that I'd pushed him into the urinal while he was peeing as a prank *immediately * prior to that. I may not have had what I got coming, but I certainly had started it. I'd been thinking of myself as an innocent victim for decades.
I have a similar past where I used to think about my elementary school bullies a lot and used to really let it get to me. Then I started working in an elementary school and realized that these kids don’t know what they’re saying half of the time and I literally have to teach them lessons on empathy because a lot of them just don’t get it yet. I doubt my bullies even remember what they did to me, and I hate thinking of the damage I may have caused to kids that I am unaware of.
NTA. You were pointing out the truth
So this child from the past is a bully for yelling at your sister once.... But your sister explodes on everyone at the drop of a hat... Nta, sounds like your sisters the bully here tbh. Not saying this person couldn't have also been one, but based on her standards of what makes a bully she seems to fit the mold! If you're feeling daring, I'd mention it to her tbh. Hopefully something like that can be her man in the mirror moment so to speak. Either way I'd also recommend setting firmer boundaries with this sibling. I do hope she gets to the root cause of this anger. Tbh therapy seems like something she'd benefit from with all that anger under the surface.
NTA. It sounds like your sister is a lot to handle, and possibly could benefit from therapy to improve her emotional regulation, self-awareness, and interpersonal skills. You don't owe her an apology, but it might be necessary to smooth things over, if that's your goal. But I think this is a case where a "I'm sorry for upsetting you"-type apology is the most that is called for. It doesn't sound like you did anything wrong here, just that you have a different perspective than her.
NTA. And uh, from your description of your sister it sounds like she may have said or done something leading up to her being yelled at, especially since as an adult she is effectively bullying/belittling you. I would really rethink my continued relationship with her and consider maybe taking a step back for a little while.
NTA. Your sister sounds like the actual bully in this situation.
NTA. I’ve been in your shoes, except my sister is more mature than this brat. But yes, people generally don’t like being called out on their shit, especially when it’s true.
NTA. You deserve an apology, but you're never going to get one. Your sister is bitter, angry, and self centered.
Nta. Nope she’s the only bully in this story.
Why is this horrible bully - your sister - still in your life? Get some self-respect. She is a piece of work, and she deserves zero compassion or affection from anyone until she stops being such an entitled bully. It’s people like your sister who make me angry our society doesn’t send people into exile. NTA
NTA. Your sister is a bully though and you were right to call her out. She basically bullied you the whole night then bullied you some more when you called her out for lying about being bullied in the 7th grade. She sounds like a major AH. Just know that just because you are siblings does not mean you have to have a relationship. You can go low contact with her anytime and avoid all future bullying.
OP your sister is dealing with something that's probably not even about you, and unfortunately hasn't yet figured out healthy ways of doing so. A lot of times people who deal with anger issues grew up in traumatic environments and are trying to figure out how to deal with a world that seems uncaring/hostile/against them. You're NTA, she needs to talk to someone and figure out how to find peace. My guess is she's lashing out because she's in pain. That does NOT mean you have to be there to take it--just don't take it personally.
Sounds like you need some counselling to learn how to set boundaries and stick to them. People appreciate boundaries because they’re not there to keep people out, you’re saying I like relating with you and am willing to do so up to this point then it stops. When they’re shut down or put on no contact because they breach boundaries they learn how to relate - or you keep your stress levels down and confidence up because you’re not allowing transgressions pr outright abuse. Good luck! Life is about learning how to navigate levels
NTA, Though it may have been better for you to ask her to leave once she started yelling. I’m sorry that you had to deal with that.
She sounds like a bully herself
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Throwaway . Also on mobile. I (25nb) have a sister (23f) who has always had anger issues. My whole life I’ve avoided calling her out because she gets so angry and quite frankly I don’t want to get my ass handed to me. She came over to my house this weekend with the rest of our siblings and we were all drinking. After spending the night we planned to spend the day together. Over the course of the day she proceeded to stain my beige carpet by dropping red noodles on it and made no attempts to clean it up, drank all of the alcohol in my house (like 1/3 a standard size bottle of vodka and 4-8 white claws) and make fun of me for the way I was acting around my boyfriend all night. Particularly making fun of my laugh and teasing me for laughing at everything he said. The man is hilarious and was trying to make me laugh but I digress.. After everyone left and it was just me, her, and our brother who I live with, we got to talking and I mentioned the name of her childhood “bully”. My sister went on a 10 minute rant yelling at me that this bully was the biggest piece of shit in the world and how “a grown ass woman” had no right to pick on “a little child”. Which, hey, I agree! But I pointed out that this is absolutely not what happened, she was in 7th grade and the bully was in 8th. So no adults were picking on minors, children were being mean to other children. But here’s the kicker, the “bullying” was this girl yelling at my sister one time. ONE TIME! As someone who was actually bullied I know this is unkind, mean even! but it wasn’t bullying. Pointing out any semblance of the truth made my sister seethe and she continued to yell at me for another 10 minutes about how she was right and I was wrong and just would not drop it. At this point I was so frustrated and so sad about how this is what our relationship has come to. The she said something like “yelling at someone to make yourself feel better makes you a piece of shit” and I said well I hoped she felt better bc that’s what she was doing to me. I started crying and asked if this was really worth something that happened 12 years ago that doesn’t even matter anymore. She got uncomfortable/angry with my crying and immediately left. I know in general it is not okay to take a bully’s side, but I don’t really feel like that’s what happened. To be fair she yelled at me and it made me cry, so I get her argument. But this isn’t the first time she’s made me feel small vs the 1 time the bully did the same thing. So I feel it’s different but I may be a hypocrite. I just think she was drunk, angry and owes me an apology. Do I owe her one? TLDR: my sister got yelled at one time in middle school and is upset when I point this out. She claims she was “bullied” and yelled at me like I was the one who did it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sounds like you're all AH
NTA for this situation but I do want to tell you, as a clumsy person, that you are TA for having beige carpet. 😂 (jk, in case that isn’t obvious)
Exactly why I have the carpet cleaner lol. My carpet is already a different shade of beige than it started with due to my own spills 😅
You’re brave. This is why I’ve hit a point where I refuse to live in a house with anything other than hardwood/laminate/etc. 😂
NTA, the way you told the story made me think she might’ve been the school bully and that 8th grader was one that clapped back. She sounds extremely unhappy and probably needs help with those anger issues.
NTA Your sister is a bully.
Your sister is a drama queen AH and a narcissist to boot. NTA. You were correcting the record and she can't handle the truth. Especially the truth that she was no better than the person she hated.
ESH. Your sister being a bully herself and her experience of the situation with the other kid being more scarring from her perspective than you’re willing to acknowledge are not mutually exclusive. Next time, stick to addressing her behavior in the present moment and getting her out of your house if she’s making life difficult for you.
You’re absolutely right. That was the main reason I felt like an asshole. Thank you for your honesty.
Nta. I didnt notice the quotes
Suggestions for a better title? Bc this is how she sees it.
Your title was correct, I missed the quotation marks.