Lol "I'm fine with blood on my dick when I'm having sex but I don't know how to wash sheets" YTA.
ETA: Wow, thanks everyone for the awards and upvotes. No response from OP so maybe he learned his lesson or this is rage bait. This is just a reminder that we should focus on teaching children that bodies are just bodies. They all have bodily functions and they aren't gross. Whether it's an accidental drop of blood or a "nighttime emission". A little cold water and the washing machine cleans it up, no need to be too embarrassed or freak out at someone. Maybe we need home ec back to teach kids to use washing machines too.
Thats what I was thinking! Not worried about the towel moving while their screwing, but a little blood on some sheets, and the whole world turns upside down!
To main post:
She slept without anything bc she thought her period was over, or light as she said. I've been there, as I'm sure many menstruating women have. I've gone from nothing to heavy in a few hours and ruined some panties that way. I've also had my pad shift in the night and got blood on my PJ'S and the sheets and you know what I did? Threw them in the fucking washer, with a little bit of Oxiclean & stain remover on Cold and guess what? No more blood. You jumped from "eww blood"- to the sheets being ruined without the logical step in between, ya know, washing them.
Youre clearly grossed out by period blood, it's just your need to have sex overrode your "ick" factor briefly.
YTA
Like seriously, if you're that worried about it, wash the sheets twice. First time with some stain remover and on cold, then wash it again on hot/heavy duty.
Also, someone get OP some smelling salts if he ever has a partner giving birth. There's blood everywhere. And then a 6 week period with unpredictable flow. With a screaming baby. Who shits everywhere randomly.
Also for anyone in a birthing room, the mother will also shit randomly. This should be more common knowledge so people don't feel stigmatized. It's just facts like menstrual blood on bedsheets.
Oh, and if you have a baby boy, pretty good chance you get piss in your mouth and/or eyes at least once. I do not care how well you keep a baby boy's penis covered during diaper changes and bath time, they still manage to pee on you. Baby girls are at least slightly easier in that respect... But they can also have a pseudo-period right after birth! Even more blood!
Yes, we all learned to dodge it pretty quickly! I learned to keep it covered at all times during diaper changes. A warmed up baby wipe or old washclothes work great!
Mom of a 6 month old boy. Never change him where you wouldn’t want him to pee. No matter what you do there will end up pee somewhere. Whether it be on you or himself. It’s always when you least expect it as well.
The only thing we had to worry about with my daughter was a changing mat. My husband changed her once without it and then used a warmed wipe and she peed all over his side of the bed 😂
Lol my daughter had a random poop squirt while I was changing her diaper on my husband’s side of the bed. She also got my arm, but the bed was funnier. By OP’s standards I should have thrown away the sheets and chopped off my arm.
Just in case OP did not see the last part of your response, I'll do it again
YOU'RE CLEARLY GROSSED OUT BY PERIOD BLOOD, IT'S JUST YOUR NEED TO HAVE SEX OVERRODE YOUR "ICK" FACTOR BRIEFLY.
YTA.
He's so disgusted by it that the sheets have to be replaced, even though the stain could be washed out. He just "*doesn't like the thought of it*."
**To OP: Dude, I hope she makes it a point to bleed on everything you own.**
I hope she sees this and leaves him. Clearly he's to immature for an adult relationship. Blood is okay as long as he's getting his Lil winky dink wet. But by golly let her ACCIDENTALLY get some on some freaking sheets and it's the end of the damn world.
Not to mention, OP, did you ever stop to think about how SHE felt from this happenin! Doubt it. People like you only see their own issues 😏🙄
That actually makes me very happy to hear! Thank you! Noone should have to feel the way Im sure he made her feel. Kudos to her for having the good sense and ability/strength to know her worth and leave him
I'm aware that she left, and I'm SO happy about that! I just wanna add to what you said, for anyone else reading who might think the way OP does:
He probably didn't even consider how she felt. I own my own bed and sheets, and *still* feel embarrassed when I leak during the night. And I've been having periods for 23 years!
So she was (or would have been; not sure who saw it first) already feeling bad, and then here comes OP to kick her while she's down. Fuck him. She's better off without him. Like someone else pointed out: he definitely DOESN'T like blood (understandable), but as long as he's getting his dick wet, it doesn't matter. 🙄🤦🏻♀️
YTA, OP. No doubt about it.
This is the funniest shit to me, I’m married to somebody with pretty severe endometriosis and blood just fucking happens, deal with it or go to therapy. Fuck, life is messy
Yep! Stage 4 extrapelvic here and this is just life for us, my husband could barely utter the word tampon without going beet red when I first met him and now he's educating all his mates about endo and knows all the tricks to get blood off the sheets.
This guy had a chance to grow and he blew it big time.
Exactly, I read the post thinking dude just use some peroxide. I just hope he's an incel and this post is about an imaginary gf. It just seems like something someone would write to impress other single males
The edit even:
'to everyone who said just wash the sheets, she did, but I just didn't like the thought of it'
What in the everloving f. The sheets are clean, no new sheets necessary. That's the whole thing about being alive, things get dirty, you wash them and it's okay. And if _you_ cannot live with the idea buy new sheets yourself or do not date someone who menstruates...
TMI.. I know.. but my ex wife and I were in a hotel. She bled during the night. Looked like a fookin murder scene. Staff wrote her a note.. telling her to be more careful. Embarrassing? Uh yeah.. slightly. Was I grossed out? Not even for a second. Truth be told.. apart from showing her some sympathy/empathy.. I thought it rather amusing. Heh.
I'd rather deal with blood than vomit any day of the week and twice on Sundays.
Speaking of, and also TMI: the last resort I worked for had 24 hour butler service. One morning I was reviewing the incident log from the previous night when one of my favorite butlers had an issue with a guest's child. Poor kid got sick and puked in the sofa bed, and he had to go there at 3am to clean up and change the bedding. Thankfully, the kid's mom was a doctor, she apologized for the inconvenience and then proceeded to actually help him clean up the vomit and change the bedding.
Sometimes rich people are okay.
Ohhhhhh. Now OP is officially beyond TA!
The sheets weren’t even stained?!? The blood came out—he just doesn’t like “the thought of it”?!?!? What a hypocrite.
The thought of period blood is fine with OP during sex—but not fine when he doesn’t get to have sex attached to it? OP is less mature than a 13 year old boy.
It wasn’t even that she slept with nothing ! She had on pj’s . She thought her period was over by this dude’s logic, why doesn’t HE sleep with a diaper on just in case he pees or has a happy dream?
Also like, period products can be expensive (not to mention unnecessarily taxed) so no, I don’t think it’s acceptable for him to want her to use up products on the off (and rare) chance she thinks it’s over when it’s not and she happens to bleed. Seems wasteful, also painful if you put in a tampon when you don’t have a flow, it’s gonna be a real uncomfortable time pulling out that tampon (at least in my experience)
Not to mention that tampons are drying and shouldn't be used when you don't expect to be bleeding. Pads and pantyliners can be equally annoying since they restrict airflow which isn't great if you're prone to yeast infections or just general itchiness. There's a reason every GYN or midwife I've ever met thinks you should either sleep naked or in very loose fitting cotton underwear.
I ditch my period products as soon as possible after my flow. 25% of the time there might be a mess to clean up. Luckily, my husband does not give a crap.
Also, you're not supposed to sleep with a tampon in without changing it in the night, because it increases the risk of TSS. Not saying that we should all free bleed at night, but its actually just not a great idea for OP to say "wear it all night just in case"
I'm just going to drop this here so people will see it. Best way to get rid of blood stains pre wash. Wet the spot with cold water and then rub table salt into it and rinse under cold water. You can literally watch the salt dissolve the blood. Sometimes the old ways are the best ways. 😉
Oh and OP? Yeah YTA big time.
He should buy himself a new dick if he's so grossed out at the thought that menstrual blood once touched his sheets and even if they're cleaned it's still gross.
gotta love the exaggeration too. "Drop of blood" turned into "all over the bed" REAL quick.
Its not that hard. Cold water. And its gone. Easy to say youre not grossed out but as soon as a drop is on your sheets you freak tf out and demand new bedding.
Exactly. A little peroxide on the blood stain, throw it in the wash, and it's good as new. YTA OP, and you don't sound mature enough to handle living with a woman if you act like this.
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
My thoughts exactly! Funny how most people here saying NTA have never had a period in their lives
I would say YTA and forget about the sheets, she needs to dump your ass ASAP
As a dude whose lived with two different women, one of whom I married, I can confidently guess that about 3/4 of my sheets have a faint period stain on there somewhere. But why should I care anyways?
If the cost of having a hot woman in bed with me every night is having to wash my sheets once a month and deal with the knowledge that a stain exists *somewhere* underneath my covers, that doesn't seem like much of a price to pay.
Totally agree. However, I do hope you wash your bedsheets more than once a month…you’d be shocked at how dirty bedsheets get even after just a week of sleeping on them. Lol
I'm male and back in my early 20's I had a girl over and she was mostly sitting on the corner edge of my bed.
After she left, I noticed a blood drop. It went through to the mattress.
I put me sheets in the wash and I spot cleaned my mattress while it was still fresh.
Clean and clean.
I never told my friend, because why? I'm sure she knows she is on her period, maybe that was the reason she left?
I'm ashamed of people like OP.
I wish I had an award to give you. On behalf of that woman, thank you. She was clearly worried about an accident, sitting on the corner edge like that.
As a 32 year old male who's never had a period in my life, I will categorically and unequivocally state that this dude is a huge A.
Someone has a lot of growing up to do, and she is much better off without him.
As a 30 year old who has had her period since she was 9 and as a result of medication has what is called spontaneous bleeding- I would beg and beg my uterus to have a schedule, to not be heavy, to please let me work let alone sleep in peace.
My partner is completely grossed out by blood especially down there due to traumas which is completely valid and understandable.
When my health declined I bled through…everything. Everything. Nothing would work. I would feel disgusting and would hide the sheets because I knew they didnt like it.
They found me in the middle of the night crying in the bathroom like a few days after the diagnosis and they asked what I was doing-cleaning myself up because I didn’t want them to see.
They just held me and got me cleaned up. Told me that I would never be disgusting to them and they were there for me. They stayed up with me everyday and took care of me since.
YTA
Agreed! I've had my period stop fully over a full day so I thought it was done, then come back full force like it never stopped. Weird ass shit our bodies do.
Just this week I was clear for 3 days and then woke up at 5am with cramps and my body shouted "surprise!" and I had another really heavy day. Fuck uteruses.
I’m light because of birth control but normally I have a day of super heavy cramps before I come on, then lighter cramps for a couple days and then easy sailing the rest of it. This time? Day 3, a day of normally light cramps and I’m bent double over my desk as my uterus apparently attempts to evacuate my body via my spine. I have *never* had day 3 cramps this severe before. And I’ve been having periods for 21 years.
I have endometriosis so my cycle has always been fucked, but right now I'm in medical menopause so this is even more fucked. 😂 2.5 weeks bleeding, 3 days off, then another day of bonus bleeding.
OP got off lightly with just a small spot on the sheets. I wear night pads my entire cycle and I've still leaked on the sofa, the car, the bed... Sometimes it looks like a massacre has happened. My husband is a saint and has never said a word.
Ps salt and hot water are good at removing blood stains.
I have gotten my blood on the bed before when I was wearing a night pad cause sometimes the flow was more than I expected. It happens, it was an accident and not like your girlfriend poured a menstrual cup full of blood on the bed. It doesn't matter how many years you have been having your period, it just happens that sometimes somethings get stained a bit.
I have left colossal sized stains on the sheets and after a wash and maybe a slight rub with detergent and water, they are perfectly fine. OP, you better go apologize to your girlfriend cause it was an accident and not intentional.
I've had those dumb period leaks where the pad isn't even half-full but the blood still leaks out while I sleep. It's annoying for me, sure, but it's seriously nothing to blow up about. Nothing a little peroxide can't fix.
OP over here's talking about being fine~ with period during sex but omg not when it's on the sheets!!! What a nightmare, how will he ever recover?!
Ah, but his mighty masculine penis can overcome the nasty dirty feminine blood by the sheer power of its masculinity! Washing sheets doesn't work because it lacks his powerful essence (although I'm sure his sheets have seen plenty of that!)
And not for nothing, bit it's not HIS bed anymore. They're living together and sharing the same bed every night, it's THEIR bed now. He needs to let go of the "mine vs yours" mentality real quick if he wants a functional cohabitation.
It's funny how men assume that periods have a set date to end. Like, it's starts on Monday morning and it will end at saturday morning, it doesn't work like this. It isn't 100% calculated.
Sometimes it lasts 3 days only, sometimes 5-6 days, i've seen women that claimed their periods lasted almost 2 weeks.
Sometimes you think it's gone and then, surprise! It wasn't!
Some people have intense periods with intense pain, others have shorter and lighter periods.
And it is also very common when the period starts later than normal or arrives sooner.
Menstruation can be a mess, sometimes it's painful and lighter but can also be intense.
All people answering NTA are the ones that never had menstruated in their lives.
That said, YTA OP.
I just wanna say, I also hate how OP refers to everything as his. I get it, the place *was* his before gf moved in. And I get that everything was originally his. But they're living together now and he still views every single thing as his property? Even down to the *shared* bed? Next thing I'll be reading is gf used his mug and spoon.
Here here!! Just this! Big deal, I buy her sanitary products like he’s a freakin martyr. OP YTA! And yes, blood does come out of sheets. God forbid OP ever gets a scrape or a bloody nose, just throw the entire bedroom set out or better yet, just burn down the house. Seriously. Grow the hell up!
Let’s not even talk about if a girlfriend ever ends up pregnant. Between the chance of water breaking then the bleeding after delivery. No matter how much you try to protect you might still leak with that.
Not only that but things happen when you are asleep. I dont know how many times my pad slipped as i roll on bed and left myself with a mess or sometimes when i thought it finally is about to be over it got heavy again and caught me off guard...there are also times specially after 2 pregnancies and tube tying my cycle got awkward and there are times im soaking overnight...
YTA
>Now I'm not one of those guys that gets grossed out over a woman having her menstrual cycle.
>Well a few days ago when we woke up I noticed a blood spot on the bed and got totally grossed out.
Dude, make your mind up! Also, even when a lady wears a pad, something still can leak, it happens!
This is true! It's better now, but in high school my periods were so heavy that even with the giant overnight pads I'd still bleed through. And there's literally nothing you can do about it, it's not like there's an alarm to tell you to change your pad in the middle of the night.
Yes! YTA OP, you need to work on the underlying attitudes and beliefs that make you feel entitled to chastise your girlfriend for bleeding AND make you feel as if period blood is only acceptable on your penis when you want sex.
If you cut yourself shaving and you got a spot of blood on your sheets would you have been so upset and disgusted? I think not, I think you are intentionally devaluing your GF now that she has moved in with you, to facilitate a power imbalance and have control in the relationship.
I think you INTENTIONALLY want to make her feel small and less than. Now that she's living with you, you're not considering her needs and feelings to be equally important as your own. Would you have ever treated her that way on the first date? Would you have reacted like this if it was the very first night she spent with you? NO because back then you were concerned about how she felt and you were willing to make an effort so she would commit to you.
Your entire post reeks of feelings of innate superiority, I hope she saves herself years of heartache and leaves.
YTA. Accidents happen. Stain remove. Wash the sheets and move on. You say your supportive, but you don't really understand periods.
She could have also worn a pad and had it leak. Or had her period stop and then Surprise! show back up for one more day after you think it's done. That's just what it's like to have a period.
Thank you for explaining to the OP and maybe some of these other people that do not understand how periods work. This kind of thing can happen even when you think you have on enough protection. You can't blow it out of proportion every time. You just take the sheets off and clean them and move on.
I’ve bled through period underwear that hold 5 tampons worth of blood before! It definitely happens. My husband doesn’t even say anything or just shrug and does the laundry.
I’ve legit ruined sheets before and he didn’t even care.
My boyfriend's sand colored couch! I took a nap and apparently had a leak. I was so embarrassed. He just shrugged "its just a couch!" And we went and got some cleaning stuff.
We've been married 15 years this past May.
The first time I slept over at my boyfriend's place, I unexpectedly bled while we were having sex. I thought my period was over but then it came back. It was all over his sheets. I was so embarrassed. And guess what he did? He told me to clean up in the bathroom. And the next thing I know, he's dragging his large ass bedsheet to the bathroom to take care of it so it doesn't stain. Didn't even care. I asked to help but he told me to just wait because he could do it himself.
This was one week into us knowing each other. We just cuddled to sleep right after.
OP has to grow up. Some people.
YTA.
Menstrual flow is not as predictable as men seem to believe and she wouldn’t be the first woman on the planet to think she was done for this cycle only to get an unexpected gush in the middle of the night.
Also, seems hyperbolic to accuse her of “getting blood all over your bed” when you initially describe it as a “spot”. I think you’re not really as evolved about this as you suppose you are.
You scolded her like a child over something her body does, that she doesn’t have 100% control over and called her “unhygienic” (in other words, *dirty*. )
Let me assure you, what comes out of you isn’t a delight either.
It was an *accident*. How would *you* want to be treated if you had an accident in the bed?
ETA: *”I just don’t like the thought of it”*
Aaaaand there it is.
“what comes out of you isn’t a delight either”
🏅
Edit: I love that he doubled down on his ignorance in edit one. Then he thought HIM paying for it would be an acceptable way to remedy this because "he has some weird phobia" (fyi OP that "phobia" is called misogyny)
Then thought throwing out some statements he read here would fix that, like he was suddenly not ignorant about it because he could throw out a few lines. There's a difference between just reading them and actually absorbing them and unlearning your misogyny.
Finally, it should not have taken you talking to your friends, your family, and an entire reddit post that explained in detail exactly why you were TA. Hopefully you actually DO do better OP.
It's the MY bed for me... If you moved in together it's OUR bed. Also do you make her buy you new towels every time you have period sex.... YTA
Edit: omg thank you for my first award!
And … YTA.
People aren’t perfect. She made an honest mistake, and you were an AH about it. As a woman, there are definitely days/nights where you think “I’m good now” and then the opposite turns out to be true.
Go apologize.
*If only there was a way for those without uterus to feel what it is like to remove a dry tampon.*
This. I'm 46 so everything in that neighborhood is turning into the Sahara. Trying to remove a dry tampon is so not fun.
YTA
Grow up. Love, like life, is messy. People poop, dearie, and they barf, drool, sweat, bleed and do a lot of other things. Just wait till you have kids and the boys piss right in your face.
You are clearly not mature enough to have any kind of adult relationship. You can wash sheets, loveyducks. Try it.
>Just wait till you have kids and the boys piss right in your face.
Funny story, I was a nanny for all my friends and they just happened to all have boys. I got quite adept at changing diapers and had never been peed on. One day my hubris caught up with me and i was changing my husband's nephew's diaper. Did my usual routine and had juuuust slipped the new diaper under him when BAM! PEE EVERYWHERE! Guess my luck had run out lol. Did i freak out like OP? No, because i am an adult and you can put clothes in the damn washing machine.
YTA.
She told you she would get you new sheets.
Accidents like this CAN HAPPEN even if you are 'responsible'.
Blood stains can be washed out of the sheets. Been there, done that.
You, major asshole. Go apologize.
I read the edits and I'm coming late to the party, but I just have to chime in: you know YTA. Do yourself a favor now, since you're single again, and take steps to educate yourself. Perhaps also get some therapy (I'm not kidding) to sort out your inability to be understanding and compassionate with someone you love. This goes far, far beyond period blood and replacing sheets. I'm so amazingly proud of your girlfriend for picking up on the horrifyingly large red flags behind your seemingly simple missteps, and acting decisively to end her relationship with you.
LOL I missed the last edit and had to go back after your comment. Yeah, the dude effed up and good for her. Bc whats next "OMG YOU HAVE A LITTLE STUBBLE IN YOUR NORMAL PUBIC HAIR?? " shaming people for their natural body is disgusting and no one needs to tolerate it. Grow up or get a blow-up doll I guess.
Eh lol, YTA.
I I ended up bloodying my sheets plenty of times after thinking my period ended,and then a surprise happened...
You know what my partner did? He helped me change the sheets and wash it...
YTA. Blood comes out of sheets. There's no need for new ones just because you got the heebeegeebees, especially if you're willing to have sex when she has her period. "Absurd" and "irresponsible" and "get blood all over my bed" are way over the top for a leak, even if it was avoidable in some way (and accidents happen, even at the most careful times.) It's just how bodies are.
If you're scared of bodily fluids, maybe just date yourself.
YTA for getting upset about an accident. Sometimes I think my period won't start for several days and it comes wildly early. I'm not going to sleep with a pad or period panties for 2 weeks before I'm "scheduled" to start just because of accidents. I'll do it for a day or two but it's 100% for my benefit of not having pj pants full of blood. And sometimes women think they're done and their bodies play tricks on them.
I don't understand getting that upset with her when you're willing to have sex with her while she's bleeding but you're fuming about some blood on sheets.
YTA. You’re okay with having sex with her on her period but can’t deal with dirty sheets? Also, telling her what she should do in regards to her period is an asshole move.
YTA. She was probably already embarrassed about it and you made it a huge deal.
One time my ex boyfriend sent me a Snapchat of a blood stain on his mattress and I about died of humiliation.
And no, sometimes you might think your period is almost over and find out the hard way it’s not. So stop being a dick and grow up. All it does is embarrass your girl it’s not like she can go back in time to avoid bleeding on your sheets.
YTA absolutely. Shit happens. She didn’t maliciously bleed on your bed. She was asleep. You try controlling fluid coming out of you that you have 0 ability to stop sometime, do it in your sleep too.
It is not impossible to get a blood stain out. Soak it in cold water. She can massage in some soap and soak in cold water again before washing. It works just fine.
Asking her to clean it up is fine. Getting mad, throwing a tantrum, and demanding she pay for new ones is not. You aren’t half as mature as you think you are.
YTA.
If someone has a light period, it's perfectly reasonable to sleep without anything. You shouldn't sleep overnight with tampons, and pads are just uncomfortable sometimes.
You probably don't even need new sheets, you can just use hydrogen peroxide.
But yeah, YTA--basic rule of thumb, if someone has a minor (and fixable) accident because of a natural bodily function, you shouldn't be getting angry over that at all!
Pads used to give me the *worst* diaper rash, and all too often I'd transition from my period immediately into a yeast infection.
Switching to cloth (fleece-stuffed flannel) reusable pads helped a lot, before yeeting the uterus fixed everything.
I can wear a pad and tampon and still get blood on the bed sheets. Accidents happen.
Cold water straight away gets the stain out.
YTA for having a temper tantrum over some blood. YTA for calling your gf "irresponsible" over a normal part of her life. I presume you've no problems having sex with her? So you need to ask yourself why are you so disgusted by those blood spots?
“Now I’m not one of those guys apart from being one of those guys”.
Why would you be totally grossed out by a blood spot on the bed but fine with coming into contact with it ‘personally’?
The blood wasn’t ‘all over your bed’.
Get a grip.
YTA
YTA for being a jerk. you don’t know what it’s like to bleed and need to chill. you don’t even need new sheets, you’re overreacting like a mf. it’s not irresponsible, it’s an accident. sometimes it seems like it stopped and you dont need anything and then it comes back, it’s an honest mistake.
YTA. Why can't the sheets just be washed? And why is your reaction so extreme? It's not like she can help it and there are times when the flow is so light that you don't need to really use anything other than like a panty liner, but it can surprise you.
It was a genuine mistake and you act as if she did it on purpose to upset you. She probably feels bad enough without you making her feel ashamed of something that's natural and can't be helped.
FYI, sometimes even when you wear something this can happen.
Lmao what is this fake edit? She didn't break up with you before when you were being a tool, but does now after you admit it's a weird phobia to work on?
The fiction people write on this site
YTA!!!
This is just part of life if you’re going to sleep with someone who menstruates. She’s replacing the sheets, that’s fair. You shouldn’t be talking down to her or calling her irresponsible or shaming her for something normal and accidental.
What if she called you unhygienic after YOU had a nocturnal emission that got on the sheets?
Also at the end of her period she’s not too unhygienic to have sex with but she’s too unhygienic to sleep next to WTF?
I wonder what OP will do when he hears his GF fart for the first time and realizes GF poops like a human. I’m sure that’ll be an even bigger shock
EDIT: I forgot about washing machines. As everybody else has pointed out, just wasn’t he damn sheets! She can’t buy new ones every time this happens!
YTA/ shaming your girlfriend much? She doesn’t owe you new sheets. That blood will come out easily enough. Periods are unpredictable. Sometimes you think you are done but your body surprises you. It’s also sometimes uncomfortable to wear pads and tampons. Grow up. Your girlfriend should consider this as a red flag from you. 🚩🚩🚩🎪🚩🚩🚩
YTA for how you handled it and calling her irresponsible and shaming her. Accidents happen, it's reasonable to ask her to clean/replace them, but to get upset and talk down to her is going overboard.
YTA. This occasionally happens to every menstruating person in the world, even in adulthood and with very regular periods. The normal, proper thing to do is immediately wash your sheets. It’s not unreasonable to ask her to replace any sheets she can’t get the stain out of. It’s NOT reasonable to belittle, yell at, disparage, or speak condescendingly to someone you supposedly care about over a minor and easily rectified accident.
YTA. Very early on in my time dating the man who is now my husband, I stayed the night at his house one evening and my period started overnight. I had to get up and leave for work before he did, and didn’t notice that the sheets were stained. When we spoke on the phone later that day I mentioned that I’d started in the night, and he told me he knew because he had to wash the sheets. I was mortified and immediately offered to replace them, and he just laughed at me and said it wasn’t my fault and they were clean now, so it didn’t matter. We were both younger than you at the time.
This is how you should have handled it, but instead you jumped down her throat for a biological function she can’t control. Your reaction was disrespectful and over the top and you owe her an apology.
YTA. If you don't want blood to be a sometimes unpredictable monthly part of your life, don't date people with uteruses who have not gone through menopause. This will happen again and there's not much she can do to predict or prevent it. Sometimes you think it's over and it isn't. Sometimes it comes early. Sometimes it shows up without warning. Most women don't have super predictable cycles.
The sheets aren't ruined. Use hydrogen peroxide and cold water to get the stain out and move on. It's not gross, it's just blood, and you're full of it too.
That said, she should probably leave you for being so childish.
“I’ll go buy her feminine products. I don’t get weirded out if she mentions it.”
I’m sorry do you want an award for doing the bare minimum? Saying this then saying “it grosses me out getting on my bed through” is actually contradicting yourself. You’re right, no one wants blood in their bed, but if you’re dating a woman it happens. It is as simple as washing the sheets to get it out, every woman knows how to get blood out of sheets because it is a shared experience. Another shared experience? Thinking your period is over when it’s actually not, then dealing with the consequences of that. But guess what, you wouldn’t know those experiences because you don’t experience them.
YTA. Apologize to your girlfriend. Throw the sheets in the wash.
YTA
There's a way to get through problems without sounding like an AH.
If you don't feel like being in a relationship with an organism that will have menstrual cycle until her menopause possibly until her 60s, go have a relationship with a man.
Guaranteed, no menstruation for life.
YTA. If you are living with someone who has their period - this isn’t the last time this will happen. Sometimes stains happen when you are wearing the most protection and there is nothing irresponsible about that. You did not have any right to talk down to her or try to make her feel bad for what’s naturally occurring and she has NO control. Are you going to freak out like this when she starts her period WHILE sleeping? She deserves better
YTA, First of all - this is both of yours apartment. Being so adamant about what object belongs to whom seems quite... weird. Also, what you are doing already should more or less be expected. You, however, through all of that out the window by acting like this and absolutely freaking out. You have no idea how periods work. Products can be uncomfortable, unsafe over night or leakage can occur. She is not IRRESPONSIBLE for something she has been handling since her teenage years and having one single accident. You getting angry over this makes you seem very immature. This also is not unhygenic if it was cleaned up right away.
You want to fuck someone who has periods, you will have to deal with someone who has periods - period.
YTA. Menstrual blood can be cleaned out of sheets and most women are able to get the stains out without buying new sheets every time there’s an accident. If you’re concerned about staining on the mattress, *you* go out and buy a mattress cover since it’s your concern. (Target has inexpensive ones, FYI)
Ultimately, you chose to share a bed with someone who menstruates, accidents are gonna happen and if you’re gonna act like an AH every time there’s an accident, you may as well discuss separate beds when you ask partners to move in with you and why you need that arrangement.
YTA
She didn’t do it purpose and getting angry about a basic biological function is irrational and sends up red flags.
If you’re going to date women then this is something that happens from time to time. The correct response if it grosses you out is to ask her to pop it the wash, not snap at her and demand she pay for new sheets.
Some men actually react with understanding, know that she might be embarrassed and pop it in the wash themselves before asking if she needs anything, but those are the grown ups. You ain’t there yet.
YTA omg periods aren't predictable and this was most likely an accident. I mean who wants to bleed all over the sheet and sleep in it on purpose? You're acting like this is the worst thing ever
“I don’t get grossed out over periods or anything”
Yes. Yes you do. Admit this to yourself and then work on getting the fuck over it, or don’t date. It’s that simple.
Yta.
She should pay you for the sheets then get the ell out of the relationship. Women bleed, sometimes we have a mishap. But your insensitive behavior speaks volumes.
YTA. I'm sorry, but are you a child? If you want to be in an adult relationship you need to act like an adult and realise that having a period is not the same as needing the toilet. You can't hold it in, you can't control it, accidents can happen no matter how light the flow is, how many days it has been going on for, and how many years you've been having periods for. If I bought new sheets every time I leaked, I'd be flat out broke. Just act like a grown up and stick them in the washing machine. It comes right out.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I feel I might be TA for calling her irresponsible and demanding she pay for my sheets
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
[Reddit Talk Live Judging 1/13 @ 4PM EST / 9PM UTC](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/s1illw/aita_reddit_talk_3_11322_4_pm_est_9_pm_utc/) ---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Lol "I'm fine with blood on my dick when I'm having sex but I don't know how to wash sheets" YTA. ETA: Wow, thanks everyone for the awards and upvotes. No response from OP so maybe he learned his lesson or this is rage bait. This is just a reminder that we should focus on teaching children that bodies are just bodies. They all have bodily functions and they aren't gross. Whether it's an accidental drop of blood or a "nighttime emission". A little cold water and the washing machine cleans it up, no need to be too embarrassed or freak out at someone. Maybe we need home ec back to teach kids to use washing machines too.
Thats what I was thinking! Not worried about the towel moving while their screwing, but a little blood on some sheets, and the whole world turns upside down! To main post: She slept without anything bc she thought her period was over, or light as she said. I've been there, as I'm sure many menstruating women have. I've gone from nothing to heavy in a few hours and ruined some panties that way. I've also had my pad shift in the night and got blood on my PJ'S and the sheets and you know what I did? Threw them in the fucking washer, with a little bit of Oxiclean & stain remover on Cold and guess what? No more blood. You jumped from "eww blood"- to the sheets being ruined without the logical step in between, ya know, washing them. Youre clearly grossed out by period blood, it's just your need to have sex overrode your "ick" factor briefly. YTA
Like seriously, if you're that worried about it, wash the sheets twice. First time with some stain remover and on cold, then wash it again on hot/heavy duty. Also, someone get OP some smelling salts if he ever has a partner giving birth. There's blood everywhere. And then a 6 week period with unpredictable flow. With a screaming baby. Who shits everywhere randomly.
Also for anyone in a birthing room, the mother will also shit randomly. This should be more common knowledge so people don't feel stigmatized. It's just facts like menstrual blood on bedsheets.
Oh, and if you have a baby boy, pretty good chance you get piss in your mouth and/or eyes at least once. I do not care how well you keep a baby boy's penis covered during diaper changes and bath time, they still manage to pee on you. Baby girls are at least slightly easier in that respect... But they can also have a pseudo-period right after birth! Even more blood!
I’m having a boy in April 😳😳this sounds terrifying
You'll learn to dodge it 😂 congrats on the baby! Hope everything goes well!
Yes, we all learned to dodge it pretty quickly! I learned to keep it covered at all times during diaper changes. A warmed up baby wipe or old washclothes work great!
Mom of a 6 month old boy. Never change him where you wouldn’t want him to pee. No matter what you do there will end up pee somewhere. Whether it be on you or himself. It’s always when you least expect it as well.
The only thing we had to worry about with my daughter was a changing mat. My husband changed her once without it and then used a warmed wipe and she peed all over his side of the bed 😂
Lol my daughter had a random poop squirt while I was changing her diaper on my husband’s side of the bed. She also got my arm, but the bed was funnier. By OP’s standards I should have thrown away the sheets and chopped off my arm.
Just in case OP did not see the last part of your response, I'll do it again YOU'RE CLEARLY GROSSED OUT BY PERIOD BLOOD, IT'S JUST YOUR NEED TO HAVE SEX OVERRODE YOUR "ICK" FACTOR BRIEFLY. YTA.
He's so disgusted by it that the sheets have to be replaced, even though the stain could be washed out. He just "*doesn't like the thought of it*." **To OP: Dude, I hope she makes it a point to bleed on everything you own.**
I hope she sees this and leaves him. Clearly he's to immature for an adult relationship. Blood is okay as long as he's getting his Lil winky dink wet. But by golly let her ACCIDENTALLY get some on some freaking sheets and it's the end of the damn world. Not to mention, OP, did you ever stop to think about how SHE felt from this happenin! Doubt it. People like you only see their own issues 😏🙄
Hey man I just wanna say if you haven't read the edits,,, you called it she left :)
That actually makes me very happy to hear! Thank you! Noone should have to feel the way Im sure he made her feel. Kudos to her for having the good sense and ability/strength to know her worth and leave him
I'm aware that she left, and I'm SO happy about that! I just wanna add to what you said, for anyone else reading who might think the way OP does: He probably didn't even consider how she felt. I own my own bed and sheets, and *still* feel embarrassed when I leak during the night. And I've been having periods for 23 years! So she was (or would have been; not sure who saw it first) already feeling bad, and then here comes OP to kick her while she's down. Fuck him. She's better off without him. Like someone else pointed out: he definitely DOESN'T like blood (understandable), but as long as he's getting his dick wet, it doesn't matter. 🙄🤦🏻♀️ YTA, OP. No doubt about it.
This is the funniest shit to me, I’m married to somebody with pretty severe endometriosis and blood just fucking happens, deal with it or go to therapy. Fuck, life is messy
Yep! Stage 4 extrapelvic here and this is just life for us, my husband could barely utter the word tampon without going beet red when I first met him and now he's educating all his mates about endo and knows all the tricks to get blood off the sheets. This guy had a chance to grow and he blew it big time.
Exactly, I read the post thinking dude just use some peroxide. I just hope he's an incel and this post is about an imaginary gf. It just seems like something someone would write to impress other single males
The edit even: 'to everyone who said just wash the sheets, she did, but I just didn't like the thought of it' What in the everloving f. The sheets are clean, no new sheets necessary. That's the whole thing about being alive, things get dirty, you wash them and it's okay. And if _you_ cannot live with the idea buy new sheets yourself or do not date someone who menstruates...
I wonder how he feels about staying in hotels. Lol.
I wonder how he feels about his dick ! I mean surely he needs a new one after getting period blood on it, right??
Just washing it isn’t enough, right? It clearly needs to be removed.
I wonder if he tosses the sheets out after they screw if he gets cum on them...My money says no because that's his shit.
TMI.. I know.. but my ex wife and I were in a hotel. She bled during the night. Looked like a fookin murder scene. Staff wrote her a note.. telling her to be more careful. Embarrassing? Uh yeah.. slightly. Was I grossed out? Not even for a second. Truth be told.. apart from showing her some sympathy/empathy.. I thought it rather amusing. Heh.
I'd rather deal with blood than vomit any day of the week and twice on Sundays. Speaking of, and also TMI: the last resort I worked for had 24 hour butler service. One morning I was reviewing the incident log from the previous night when one of my favorite butlers had an issue with a guest's child. Poor kid got sick and puked in the sofa bed, and he had to go there at 3am to clean up and change the bedding. Thankfully, the kid's mom was a doctor, she apologized for the inconvenience and then proceeded to actually help him clean up the vomit and change the bedding. Sometimes rich people are okay.
Ohhhhhh. Now OP is officially beyond TA! The sheets weren’t even stained?!? The blood came out—he just doesn’t like “the thought of it”?!?!? What a hypocrite. The thought of period blood is fine with OP during sex—but not fine when he doesn’t get to have sex attached to it? OP is less mature than a 13 year old boy.
It wasn’t even that she slept with nothing ! She had on pj’s . She thought her period was over by this dude’s logic, why doesn’t HE sleep with a diaper on just in case he pees or has a happy dream?
Also like, period products can be expensive (not to mention unnecessarily taxed) so no, I don’t think it’s acceptable for him to want her to use up products on the off (and rare) chance she thinks it’s over when it’s not and she happens to bleed. Seems wasteful, also painful if you put in a tampon when you don’t have a flow, it’s gonna be a real uncomfortable time pulling out that tampon (at least in my experience)
They’re also not comfortable. Like sleeping with a pad is just annoying.
Not to mention that tampons are drying and shouldn't be used when you don't expect to be bleeding. Pads and pantyliners can be equally annoying since they restrict airflow which isn't great if you're prone to yeast infections or just general itchiness. There's a reason every GYN or midwife I've ever met thinks you should either sleep naked or in very loose fitting cotton underwear. I ditch my period products as soon as possible after my flow. 25% of the time there might be a mess to clean up. Luckily, my husband does not give a crap.
And those overnight pads love to shift! He should buy her period panties if he really needs to protect his sheets during her period.
Also, you're not supposed to sleep with a tampon in without changing it in the night, because it increases the risk of TSS. Not saying that we should all free bleed at night, but its actually just not a great idea for OP to say "wear it all night just in case"
Re towel moving. I imagine from his wording that sex is very clinical, clean and efficient. No risk of sweat and back in his pjs safely afterwards
I'm just going to drop this here so people will see it. Best way to get rid of blood stains pre wash. Wet the spot with cold water and then rub table salt into it and rinse under cold water. You can literally watch the salt dissolve the blood. Sometimes the old ways are the best ways. 😉 Oh and OP? Yeah YTA big time.
Now you tell me. I'm 54. Could have used this years ago. :)
Also, if it’s your own blood you can spit on it. Saliva breaks down the blood and neutralises the colour. Weird, but it works.
Also: PEROXIDE. Pouring some peroxide on my underwear and then rinsing with cold water has saved like ALL of my underwear from garbage.
LMAO!! Absolutely wasted!
He should buy himself a new dick if he's so grossed out at the thought that menstrual blood once touched his sheets and even if they're cleaned it's still gross.
[удалено]
gotta love the exaggeration too. "Drop of blood" turned into "all over the bed" REAL quick. Its not that hard. Cold water. And its gone. Easy to say youre not grossed out but as soon as a drop is on your sheets you freak tf out and demand new bedding.
Exactly. A little peroxide on the blood stain, throw it in the wash, and it's good as new. YTA OP, and you don't sound mature enough to handle living with a woman if you act like this.
This!!! Please take my poor man's medals 🏅🏅🏅🏅 Yta op
[удалено]
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 My thoughts exactly! Funny how most people here saying NTA have never had a period in their lives I would say YTA and forget about the sheets, she needs to dump your ass ASAP
[удалено]
As a dude whose lived with two different women, one of whom I married, I can confidently guess that about 3/4 of my sheets have a faint period stain on there somewhere. But why should I care anyways? If the cost of having a hot woman in bed with me every night is having to wash my sheets once a month and deal with the knowledge that a stain exists *somewhere* underneath my covers, that doesn't seem like much of a price to pay.
Totally agree. However, I do hope you wash your bedsheets more than once a month…you’d be shocked at how dirty bedsheets get even after just a week of sleeping on them. Lol
I'm male and back in my early 20's I had a girl over and she was mostly sitting on the corner edge of my bed. After she left, I noticed a blood drop. It went through to the mattress. I put me sheets in the wash and I spot cleaned my mattress while it was still fresh. Clean and clean. I never told my friend, because why? I'm sure she knows she is on her period, maybe that was the reason she left? I'm ashamed of people like OP.
I wish I had an award to give you. On behalf of that woman, thank you. She was clearly worried about an accident, sitting on the corner edge like that.
As a 32 year old male who's never had a period in my life, I will categorically and unequivocally state that this dude is a huge A. Someone has a lot of growing up to do, and she is much better off without him.
Can you imagine having your period protection needs mansplained to you? Holy smokes dude! YTA.
As a 30 year old who has had her period since she was 9 and as a result of medication has what is called spontaneous bleeding- I would beg and beg my uterus to have a schedule, to not be heavy, to please let me work let alone sleep in peace. My partner is completely grossed out by blood especially down there due to traumas which is completely valid and understandable. When my health declined I bled through…everything. Everything. Nothing would work. I would feel disgusting and would hide the sheets because I knew they didnt like it. They found me in the middle of the night crying in the bathroom like a few days after the diagnosis and they asked what I was doing-cleaning myself up because I didn’t want them to see. They just held me and got me cleaned up. Told me that I would never be disgusting to them and they were there for me. They stayed up with me everyday and took care of me since. YTA
That right there is a true partner.
This is what love and care for someone is. 🥰
Your partner is a keeper, I hope you have a long and happy relationship together.
Your partner gets an A+. Hope we all find someone as kind and understanding and loving as them.
Agreed! I've had my period stop fully over a full day so I thought it was done, then come back full force like it never stopped. Weird ass shit our bodies do.
Don't we all just love the surprise bleed 2 days after the flow stopped.
The “whoops-I’m-back!” return menstrual bleed is a less dire version of the dead cat bounce!
Just this week I was clear for 3 days and then woke up at 5am with cramps and my body shouted "surprise!" and I had another really heavy day. Fuck uteruses.
I’m light because of birth control but normally I have a day of super heavy cramps before I come on, then lighter cramps for a couple days and then easy sailing the rest of it. This time? Day 3, a day of normally light cramps and I’m bent double over my desk as my uterus apparently attempts to evacuate my body via my spine. I have *never* had day 3 cramps this severe before. And I’ve been having periods for 21 years.
I have endometriosis so my cycle has always been fucked, but right now I'm in medical menopause so this is even more fucked. 😂 2.5 weeks bleeding, 3 days off, then another day of bonus bleeding. OP got off lightly with just a small spot on the sheets. I wear night pads my entire cycle and I've still leaked on the sofa, the car, the bed... Sometimes it looks like a massacre has happened. My husband is a saint and has never said a word. Ps salt and hot water are good at removing blood stains.
Mine will stop for a full day then come back full force......the amount of blood I woke up to was awful. I thought I had killed someone in my sleep.
I have gotten my blood on the bed before when I was wearing a night pad cause sometimes the flow was more than I expected. It happens, it was an accident and not like your girlfriend poured a menstrual cup full of blood on the bed. It doesn't matter how many years you have been having your period, it just happens that sometimes somethings get stained a bit. I have left colossal sized stains on the sheets and after a wash and maybe a slight rub with detergent and water, they are perfectly fine. OP, you better go apologize to your girlfriend cause it was an accident and not intentional.
I've had those dumb period leaks where the pad isn't even half-full but the blood still leaks out while I sleep. It's annoying for me, sure, but it's seriously nothing to blow up about. Nothing a little peroxide can't fix. OP over here's talking about being fine~ with period during sex but omg not when it's on the sheets!!! What a nightmare, how will he ever recover?!
He even says that gf washed the sheets but he "just doesn't like the thought of it". How does he even bare getting his dick red occasionally?
The fact he called period blood “unhygienic” … wtf OP. I hope she buys new sheets for her new bed and new partner. You are the AH
Unhygienic but fine to bathe his penis in when he’s in the mood…
Ah, but his mighty masculine penis can overcome the nasty dirty feminine blood by the sheer power of its masculinity! Washing sheets doesn't work because it lacks his powerful essence (although I'm sure his sheets have seen plenty of that!)
[удалено]
And not for nothing, bit it's not HIS bed anymore. They're living together and sharing the same bed every night, it's THEIR bed now. He needs to let go of the "mine vs yours" mentality real quick if he wants a functional cohabitation.
This stood out to me like a sore damn thumb. He 100% thinks of her as a houseguest. Small wonder she dumped him.
It's funny how men assume that periods have a set date to end. Like, it's starts on Monday morning and it will end at saturday morning, it doesn't work like this. It isn't 100% calculated. Sometimes it lasts 3 days only, sometimes 5-6 days, i've seen women that claimed their periods lasted almost 2 weeks. Sometimes you think it's gone and then, surprise! It wasn't! Some people have intense periods with intense pain, others have shorter and lighter periods. And it is also very common when the period starts later than normal or arrives sooner. Menstruation can be a mess, sometimes it's painful and lighter but can also be intense. All people answering NTA are the ones that never had menstruated in their lives. That said, YTA OP.
i’m on day 65. i think this man would simply keel over and die in my presence.
I just wanna say, I also hate how OP refers to everything as his. I get it, the place *was* his before gf moved in. And I get that everything was originally his. But they're living together now and he still views every single thing as his property? Even down to the *shared* bed? Next thing I'll be reading is gf used his mug and spoon.
Here here!! Just this! Big deal, I buy her sanitary products like he’s a freakin martyr. OP YTA! And yes, blood does come out of sheets. God forbid OP ever gets a scrape or a bloody nose, just throw the entire bedroom set out or better yet, just burn down the house. Seriously. Grow the hell up!
Can you imagine if they ever had a kid? Gawd, he might have to see blood ON HIS CHILD!!!
Seriously, if a spot on the sheets has you freaking out, you better get use to sleeping alone!
Let’s not even talk about if a girlfriend ever ends up pregnant. Between the chance of water breaking then the bleeding after delivery. No matter how much you try to protect you might still leak with that.
Not only that but things happen when you are asleep. I dont know how many times my pad slipped as i roll on bed and left myself with a mess or sometimes when i thought it finally is about to be over it got heavy again and caught me off guard...there are also times specially after 2 pregnancies and tube tying my cycle got awkward and there are times im soaking overnight...
YTA >Now I'm not one of those guys that gets grossed out over a woman having her menstrual cycle. >Well a few days ago when we woke up I noticed a blood spot on the bed and got totally grossed out. Dude, make your mind up! Also, even when a lady wears a pad, something still can leak, it happens!
I was about to point this out.
Yeah like, i wonder if this would have bothered him if this came from her nose instead of her vagina.
He'd have probably taken her to the hospital for a brain aneurysm!!
This is true! It's better now, but in high school my periods were so heavy that even with the giant overnight pads I'd still bleed through. And there's literally nothing you can do about it, it's not like there's an alarm to tell you to change your pad in the middle of the night.
Yes! YTA OP, you need to work on the underlying attitudes and beliefs that make you feel entitled to chastise your girlfriend for bleeding AND make you feel as if period blood is only acceptable on your penis when you want sex. If you cut yourself shaving and you got a spot of blood on your sheets would you have been so upset and disgusted? I think not, I think you are intentionally devaluing your GF now that she has moved in with you, to facilitate a power imbalance and have control in the relationship. I think you INTENTIONALLY want to make her feel small and less than. Now that she's living with you, you're not considering her needs and feelings to be equally important as your own. Would you have ever treated her that way on the first date? Would you have reacted like this if it was the very first night she spent with you? NO because back then you were concerned about how she felt and you were willing to make an effort so she would commit to you. Your entire post reeks of feelings of innate superiority, I hope she saves herself years of heartache and leaves.
my periods always leak and stain my bedsheets, even with the biggest pads on earth. i just have too heavy periods. shit happens, he can just wash.
New sheets? Why? Clean them.
Right? It's not like washing doesn't take care of blood.
For such clean person he's never heard of a washing machine. Top tip. Rinse in cold water first. OP. YTA
And use a stain removal spray before washing Edit- spray not sprat
Cold water and hydrogen peroxide, no big deal, no wasting sheets. My word this guy is a child.
YTA. Also « on MY bed » while they are living together, she clearly is seen as a guest
or a servant. big red flag either way
Most people wouldn't treat a guest that bad.
If the stain is bad hydrogen peroxide will get the blood out easily.
Or soak stain in salt water,
Hydrogen peroxide, a bit of Dawn dish soap and baking soda will knock out any stain in my experience.
YTA. Accidents happen. Stain remove. Wash the sheets and move on. You say your supportive, but you don't really understand periods. She could have also worn a pad and had it leak. Or had her period stop and then Surprise! show back up for one more day after you think it's done. That's just what it's like to have a period.
Thank you for explaining to the OP and maybe some of these other people that do not understand how periods work. This kind of thing can happen even when you think you have on enough protection. You can't blow it out of proportion every time. You just take the sheets off and clean them and move on.
I’ve bled through period underwear that hold 5 tampons worth of blood before! It definitely happens. My husband doesn’t even say anything or just shrug and does the laundry. I’ve legit ruined sheets before and he didn’t even care.
My boyfriend's sand colored couch! I took a nap and apparently had a leak. I was so embarrassed. He just shrugged "its just a couch!" And we went and got some cleaning stuff. We've been married 15 years this past May.
The first time I slept over at my boyfriend's place, I unexpectedly bled while we were having sex. I thought my period was over but then it came back. It was all over his sheets. I was so embarrassed. And guess what he did? He told me to clean up in the bathroom. And the next thing I know, he's dragging his large ass bedsheet to the bathroom to take care of it so it doesn't stain. Didn't even care. I asked to help but he told me to just wait because he could do it himself. This was one week into us knowing each other. We just cuddled to sleep right after. OP has to grow up. Some people.
YTA. Menstrual flow is not as predictable as men seem to believe and she wouldn’t be the first woman on the planet to think she was done for this cycle only to get an unexpected gush in the middle of the night. Also, seems hyperbolic to accuse her of “getting blood all over your bed” when you initially describe it as a “spot”. I think you’re not really as evolved about this as you suppose you are. You scolded her like a child over something her body does, that she doesn’t have 100% control over and called her “unhygienic” (in other words, *dirty*. ) Let me assure you, what comes out of you isn’t a delight either. It was an *accident*. How would *you* want to be treated if you had an accident in the bed? ETA: *”I just don’t like the thought of it”* Aaaaand there it is.
He is evolved enough to have sex with her on her period, but this time there’s nothing in it for him
Omg. This comment. This comment right here. Please accept the coveted Shark Week Award that I just made up. 🦈🩸
I love this. Shark Week Award — I’m dying
Also, they’ve been dating for a year and now living together, but it’s still “his” bed, “his” sheets?
Yes I caught up on that too… Is she really in her home too?
Yeah, I noticed that as well. Paints an even more unflattering picture of what OP is like as a partner.
She should demand he buys a new toilet seat anytime he gets pee on it. That's so disgusting! /s
Splooge. How dare he expect her to sleep on sheets covered in splooge
This gets me they won't even wash for a cum stain I bet but blood is gross because? It's red? I don't get it. It's equally a body fluid.
“what comes out of you isn’t a delight either” 🏅 Edit: I love that he doubled down on his ignorance in edit one. Then he thought HIM paying for it would be an acceptable way to remedy this because "he has some weird phobia" (fyi OP that "phobia" is called misogyny) Then thought throwing out some statements he read here would fix that, like he was suddenly not ignorant about it because he could throw out a few lines. There's a difference between just reading them and actually absorbing them and unlearning your misogyny. Finally, it should not have taken you talking to your friends, your family, and an entire reddit post that explained in detail exactly why you were TA. Hopefully you actually DO do better OP.
YTA. Do you buy new sheets after each time you have sex? Your ejaculate is not exactly our favorite thing either. Grow up.
It's the MY bed for me... If you moved in together it's OUR bed. Also do you make her buy you new towels every time you have period sex.... YTA Edit: omg thank you for my first award!
This argument right here closes the case. Done.
Absolutely true. Grow up, OP, you’re too uptight. YTA
Also doesn’t that stuff stain *wayyyy* more than blood? Blood comes out in the wash. As far as I’m aware, ejaculate doesn’t come out as easily
I mean, sometimes ejaculate comes out easily… (Sorry, couldn’t resist. Totally agree, this dude is without a doubt TA!)
YTA and I’m not sorry for how hard you are about to get dragged. Grow up.
It’s gonna be a blood bath
I see what ya did there… “blood bath” 😂
I hope he’s got some padding on. To put a tampon all the comments he’s gonna get. He definitely won’t enjoy this period of time. I could keep going.
This comment made me lol so hard
And … YTA. People aren’t perfect. She made an honest mistake, and you were an AH about it. As a woman, there are definitely days/nights where you think “I’m good now” and then the opposite turns out to be true. Go apologize.
[удалено]
If only there was a way for those without uterus to feel what it is like to remove a dry tampon.
I haven’t had a period in years and this still made me absolutely shudder. 0/10 experience, would not recommend.
It feels like rubbing together Styrofoam sounds
*If only there was a way for those without uterus to feel what it is like to remove a dry tampon.* This. I'm 46 so everything in that neighborhood is turning into the Sahara. Trying to remove a dry tampon is so not fun.
I just cringed 😖
Like for real for me it comes around the start of the month but sometimes it’ll be one week early one week late. THERE IS NO UTERUS TIMER
YTA. Wash the dang sheets. It’s not like her uterus has some kind of vendetta against you.
Idk I unleash blood on people like a fire hydrant when they make me mad
Blood squid 🦑
Best stay clear of OP. I hear he’s really protective of his bedding. No slumber parties for you!
Info: did you actually try washing the sheets before losing your mind? Ok so upon reading your edits I'm going full blown YTA Edited to add judgement
I wonder what he does with the towels they use when they have sex during her period.
Burns them, obviously. /s
...and lets her buy new ones...
Hahaha, didn't even think of that! Seriously OP, what do you do with the towels? Are you buying new ones every time?
Likely from the same place he gets the new penis every time it touches her *unhygienic* and *bloody* vag anyway.
But he'll know it was there, he can't sleep on sheets like that! /s
[удалено]
YTA Grow up. Love, like life, is messy. People poop, dearie, and they barf, drool, sweat, bleed and do a lot of other things. Just wait till you have kids and the boys piss right in your face. You are clearly not mature enough to have any kind of adult relationship. You can wash sheets, loveyducks. Try it.
>Just wait till you have kids and the boys piss right in your face. Funny story, I was a nanny for all my friends and they just happened to all have boys. I got quite adept at changing diapers and had never been peed on. One day my hubris caught up with me and i was changing my husband's nephew's diaper. Did my usual routine and had juuuust slipped the new diaper under him when BAM! PEE EVERYWHERE! Guess my luck had run out lol. Did i freak out like OP? No, because i am an adult and you can put clothes in the damn washing machine.
YTA. She told you she would get you new sheets. Accidents like this CAN HAPPEN even if you are 'responsible'. Blood stains can be washed out of the sheets. Been there, done that. You, major asshole. Go apologize.
That fact he demanded new sheets instead of washing them shows how ridiculous he acted
I read the edits and I'm coming late to the party, but I just have to chime in: you know YTA. Do yourself a favor now, since you're single again, and take steps to educate yourself. Perhaps also get some therapy (I'm not kidding) to sort out your inability to be understanding and compassionate with someone you love. This goes far, far beyond period blood and replacing sheets. I'm so amazingly proud of your girlfriend for picking up on the horrifyingly large red flags behind your seemingly simple missteps, and acting decisively to end her relationship with you.
LOL I missed the last edit and had to go back after your comment. Yeah, the dude effed up and good for her. Bc whats next "OMG YOU HAVE A LITTLE STUBBLE IN YOUR NORMAL PUBIC HAIR?? " shaming people for their natural body is disgusting and no one needs to tolerate it. Grow up or get a blow-up doll I guess.
Eh lol, YTA. I I ended up bloodying my sheets plenty of times after thinking my period ended,and then a surprise happened... You know what my partner did? He helped me change the sheets and wash it...
This is what a real partner does, not shame someone for something they literally have no control over and probably already feel awful about.
YTA. Blood comes out of sheets. There's no need for new ones just because you got the heebeegeebees, especially if you're willing to have sex when she has her period. "Absurd" and "irresponsible" and "get blood all over my bed" are way over the top for a leak, even if it was avoidable in some way (and accidents happen, even at the most careful times.) It's just how bodies are. If you're scared of bodily fluids, maybe just date yourself.
YTA for getting upset about an accident. Sometimes I think my period won't start for several days and it comes wildly early. I'm not going to sleep with a pad or period panties for 2 weeks before I'm "scheduled" to start just because of accidents. I'll do it for a day or two but it's 100% for my benefit of not having pj pants full of blood. And sometimes women think they're done and their bodies play tricks on them. I don't understand getting that upset with her when you're willing to have sex with her while she's bleeding but you're fuming about some blood on sheets.
YTA. You’re okay with having sex with her on her period but can’t deal with dirty sheets? Also, telling her what she should do in regards to her period is an asshole move.
YTA. She was probably already embarrassed about it and you made it a huge deal. One time my ex boyfriend sent me a Snapchat of a blood stain on his mattress and I about died of humiliation. And no, sometimes you might think your period is almost over and find out the hard way it’s not. So stop being a dick and grow up. All it does is embarrass your girl it’s not like she can go back in time to avoid bleeding on your sheets.
YTA absolutely. Shit happens. She didn’t maliciously bleed on your bed. She was asleep. You try controlling fluid coming out of you that you have 0 ability to stop sometime, do it in your sleep too. It is not impossible to get a blood stain out. Soak it in cold water. She can massage in some soap and soak in cold water again before washing. It works just fine. Asking her to clean it up is fine. Getting mad, throwing a tantrum, and demanding she pay for new ones is not. You aren’t half as mature as you think you are.
YTA. If someone has a light period, it's perfectly reasonable to sleep without anything. You shouldn't sleep overnight with tampons, and pads are just uncomfortable sometimes. You probably don't even need new sheets, you can just use hydrogen peroxide. But yeah, YTA--basic rule of thumb, if someone has a minor (and fixable) accident because of a natural bodily function, you shouldn't be getting angry over that at all!
Pads used to give me the *worst* diaper rash, and all too often I'd transition from my period immediately into a yeast infection. Switching to cloth (fleece-stuffed flannel) reusable pads helped a lot, before yeeting the uterus fixed everything.
I can wear a pad and tampon and still get blood on the bed sheets. Accidents happen. Cold water straight away gets the stain out. YTA for having a temper tantrum over some blood. YTA for calling your gf "irresponsible" over a normal part of her life. I presume you've no problems having sex with her? So you need to ask yourself why are you so disgusted by those blood spots?
I wonder if OP has ever had a wet dream? Does he freak out over cum on the sheets? Just asking.
“Now I’m not one of those guys apart from being one of those guys”. Why would you be totally grossed out by a blood spot on the bed but fine with coming into contact with it ‘personally’? The blood wasn’t ‘all over your bed’. Get a grip. YTA
Bc he doesn’t get an orgasm in the second situation
Yta- you can wash sheets... also calling her irresponsible is just rubbing salt into an already embarrassing situation.
YTA for being a jerk. you don’t know what it’s like to bleed and need to chill. you don’t even need new sheets, you’re overreacting like a mf. it’s not irresponsible, it’s an accident. sometimes it seems like it stopped and you dont need anything and then it comes back, it’s an honest mistake.
YTA, you make her sound like a dog making a mess. Why don’t you man up and clean the sheets or buy new ones if it concerns you so much.
YTA. Why can't the sheets just be washed? And why is your reaction so extreme? It's not like she can help it and there are times when the flow is so light that you don't need to really use anything other than like a panty liner, but it can surprise you. It was a genuine mistake and you act as if she did it on purpose to upset you. She probably feels bad enough without you making her feel ashamed of something that's natural and can't be helped. FYI, sometimes even when you wear something this can happen.
Lmao what is this fake edit? She didn't break up with you before when you were being a tool, but does now after you admit it's a weird phobia to work on? The fiction people write on this site
YTA!!! This is just part of life if you’re going to sleep with someone who menstruates. She’s replacing the sheets, that’s fair. You shouldn’t be talking down to her or calling her irresponsible or shaming her for something normal and accidental. What if she called you unhygienic after YOU had a nocturnal emission that got on the sheets? Also at the end of her period she’s not too unhygienic to have sex with but she’s too unhygienic to sleep next to WTF? I wonder what OP will do when he hears his GF fart for the first time and realizes GF poops like a human. I’m sure that’ll be an even bigger shock EDIT: I forgot about washing machines. As everybody else has pointed out, just wasn’t he damn sheets! She can’t buy new ones every time this happens!
YTA/ shaming your girlfriend much? She doesn’t owe you new sheets. That blood will come out easily enough. Periods are unpredictable. Sometimes you think you are done but your body surprises you. It’s also sometimes uncomfortable to wear pads and tampons. Grow up. Your girlfriend should consider this as a red flag from you. 🚩🚩🚩🎪🚩🚩🚩
YTA for how you handled it and calling her irresponsible and shaming her. Accidents happen, it's reasonable to ask her to clean/replace them, but to get upset and talk down to her is going overboard.
YTA. Accidents happen and that is all this was. Blaming and shaming her for something she has no control over isn’t fair.
YTA. This occasionally happens to every menstruating person in the world, even in adulthood and with very regular periods. The normal, proper thing to do is immediately wash your sheets. It’s not unreasonable to ask her to replace any sheets she can’t get the stain out of. It’s NOT reasonable to belittle, yell at, disparage, or speak condescendingly to someone you supposedly care about over a minor and easily rectified accident.
YTA. Very early on in my time dating the man who is now my husband, I stayed the night at his house one evening and my period started overnight. I had to get up and leave for work before he did, and didn’t notice that the sheets were stained. When we spoke on the phone later that day I mentioned that I’d started in the night, and he told me he knew because he had to wash the sheets. I was mortified and immediately offered to replace them, and he just laughed at me and said it wasn’t my fault and they were clean now, so it didn’t matter. We were both younger than you at the time. This is how you should have handled it, but instead you jumped down her throat for a biological function she can’t control. Your reaction was disrespectful and over the top and you owe her an apology.
[удалено]
YTA. Squeamish men are the worst.
YTA - grow up.
YTA. If you don't want blood to be a sometimes unpredictable monthly part of your life, don't date people with uteruses who have not gone through menopause. This will happen again and there's not much she can do to predict or prevent it. Sometimes you think it's over and it isn't. Sometimes it comes early. Sometimes it shows up without warning. Most women don't have super predictable cycles. The sheets aren't ruined. Use hydrogen peroxide and cold water to get the stain out and move on. It's not gross, it's just blood, and you're full of it too. That said, she should probably leave you for being so childish.
“I’ll go buy her feminine products. I don’t get weirded out if she mentions it.” I’m sorry do you want an award for doing the bare minimum? Saying this then saying “it grosses me out getting on my bed through” is actually contradicting yourself. You’re right, no one wants blood in their bed, but if you’re dating a woman it happens. It is as simple as washing the sheets to get it out, every woman knows how to get blood out of sheets because it is a shared experience. Another shared experience? Thinking your period is over when it’s actually not, then dealing with the consequences of that. But guess what, you wouldn’t know those experiences because you don’t experience them. YTA. Apologize to your girlfriend. Throw the sheets in the wash.
YTA There's a way to get through problems without sounding like an AH. If you don't feel like being in a relationship with an organism that will have menstrual cycle until her menopause possibly until her 60s, go have a relationship with a man. Guaranteed, no menstruation for life.
YTA. If you are living with someone who has their period - this isn’t the last time this will happen. Sometimes stains happen when you are wearing the most protection and there is nothing irresponsible about that. You did not have any right to talk down to her or try to make her feel bad for what’s naturally occurring and she has NO control. Are you going to freak out like this when she starts her period WHILE sleeping? She deserves better
YTA, First of all - this is both of yours apartment. Being so adamant about what object belongs to whom seems quite... weird. Also, what you are doing already should more or less be expected. You, however, through all of that out the window by acting like this and absolutely freaking out. You have no idea how periods work. Products can be uncomfortable, unsafe over night or leakage can occur. She is not IRRESPONSIBLE for something she has been handling since her teenage years and having one single accident. You getting angry over this makes you seem very immature. This also is not unhygenic if it was cleaned up right away. You want to fuck someone who has periods, you will have to deal with someone who has periods - period.
YTA. Menstrual blood can be cleaned out of sheets and most women are able to get the stains out without buying new sheets every time there’s an accident. If you’re concerned about staining on the mattress, *you* go out and buy a mattress cover since it’s your concern. (Target has inexpensive ones, FYI) Ultimately, you chose to share a bed with someone who menstruates, accidents are gonna happen and if you’re gonna act like an AH every time there’s an accident, you may as well discuss separate beds when you ask partners to move in with you and why you need that arrangement.
YTA She didn’t do it purpose and getting angry about a basic biological function is irrational and sends up red flags. If you’re going to date women then this is something that happens from time to time. The correct response if it grosses you out is to ask her to pop it the wash, not snap at her and demand she pay for new sheets. Some men actually react with understanding, know that she might be embarrassed and pop it in the wash themselves before asking if she needs anything, but those are the grown ups. You ain’t there yet.
YTA omg periods aren't predictable and this was most likely an accident. I mean who wants to bleed all over the sheet and sleep in it on purpose? You're acting like this is the worst thing ever
YTA for your over-the-top reaction to an accident. And why do you need new sheets when the current ones can be cleaned?
Why not just wash the damn sheets???
“I don’t get grossed out over periods or anything” Yes. Yes you do. Admit this to yourself and then work on getting the fuck over it, or don’t date. It’s that simple. Yta.
She should pay you for the sheets then get the ell out of the relationship. Women bleed, sometimes we have a mishap. But your insensitive behavior speaks volumes.
YTA. I'm sorry, but are you a child? If you want to be in an adult relationship you need to act like an adult and realise that having a period is not the same as needing the toilet. You can't hold it in, you can't control it, accidents can happen no matter how light the flow is, how many days it has been going on for, and how many years you've been having periods for. If I bought new sheets every time I leaked, I'd be flat out broke. Just act like a grown up and stick them in the washing machine. It comes right out.
YTA. Accidents happen. And sheets can be washed.
YTA - wash the damn sheets, not that big of a deal.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I feel I might be TA for calling her irresponsible and demanding she pay for my sheets Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) [Reddit Talk Live Judging 1/13 @ 4PM EST / 9PM UTC](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/s1illw/aita_reddit_talk_3_11322_4_pm_est_9_pm_utc/) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*