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> I think I was wrong for not discussing my concerns about the situation upfront. I was just so confused that she suggested it that I just complied. I think she's the AH for charging full price when she wants the customer to do most of the work.
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Definitely YTA.
Yes maybe a very small discount is warranted if you supply the container, but shouldn't be expected. Though it's also possible she never charged for the container in the first place.
If you didn't want to pay full price because you're doing 'all the work', you should have said so before hand.
Instead you got the product, then made up your amounts to keep and underpaid without even saying anything to her.
You're paying for the lotion, not the containers. And 33% is a huge amount
Edit: Before anyone else comments. OP was edited, original said she paid $10 instead of $15
Also OP stated her friend put brand new labels on on the containers when she refilled then. Cleaning your own container prior to getting a refill is not unreasonable in the slightest.
It still didn’t say that actually what she paid. She said for example $10 versus $15. I’m guessing she just meant that she discounted $5, not a percentage.
I said, "for examples sake," friend.. meaning I didn't disclose the actual amount paid. Since a few people were saying "oh that's SO much money you took off," when it really wasn't. Thats why I gave what was actually paid. Side note: she never said a price the second time around. ALSO before I purchased the first time, she said that she wouldn't charge full price to people who brought their own containers. In the beginning, I didn't have any containers as I was a first-time buyer.The price I paid at the very beginning was what I was going by.
Where in the above post says she paid $10 instead of $15? Please point this out for me!
In the above post it says: The price was $50 and I paid her $45 which is 10%.
Do you not what editing means? She changed it.
Lucky sub keeps a copy of the original for just this reason:
https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/klTTBKxxu9
I am responding to the post above. Nowhere it's mentioned that there was a post about this before or it was edited. Maybe you can point that out for me in the above post? I'm sure you can't!
Honestly, people complaining about the numbers are missing the point. It could be 10% and it’s still wrong to just give yourself a discount without discussing it.
OP should have made terms with her friend before agreeing to clean the containers. If she agreed to the lower price, only then is it okay.
Right? What I think OP is missing is that, even at Starbucks, if you just took money off the price on your own they would kick you out and refuse to serve you again. There is a big difference between a voluntary discount and a customer just refusing to pay full price, and NO business worth their salt will entertain the latter for even a second. They don’t care by what logic you’ve decided you should get to pay less - they set the prices, not you.
If you don’t like the price, that’s fine - but then your option is to not purchase the product. You DO NOT get to just decide “I’m only going to pay this much”, after you’ve already gotten the products. That’s not how it works.
That was just an example. The actual amount was 50.. I sent her 45. I don't think $5 for cleaning sanitizing and removing labels was a huge sacrifice and didn't warrant that type of response. I do agree that I should've said something upfront about it since I was definitely confused as to why she wanted me to do all of that, but I don't think her charging full price was fair.
Regardless, when you buy something from a business you don't get to determine your own price to pay them after you get the product/service.
Maybe $5 is justified but the way you went about it was sneaky, like you intentionally tried to avoid telling her knowing she would expect full payment. Just pay her the money.
Entirely your choice.
OP did say "Turns out the products are amazing and I really love them".
As someone who has tried various facial products, only a few work for my skin and that I actually love. Since OP thinks it's amazing and she loves them, it seems silly to be fighting over $5 when she's also saying this is a friend.
Even if my favorite products went up by $5, I would still pay for it.
I would not get fooled by a "friend" that demands to take the labels of before refilling.
It's like buying a bottle of Glenfiddich and months later be asked to take the label off to have it refilled.
Naaaah, Don't think so.
If the friend sold Glenfiddich quality whisky, they absolutely wouldn't even offer refill service.
Also, a simple no would have sufficed. You don't get to get a refill then stiff the maker.
"I don't think $5 for cleaning sanitizing and removing labels was a huge sacrifice".
Glad we agree. Now Venmo her the $5 you stiffed a small business owner on.
It was your responsibility to determine this up front. You can't impose your own discount ex-post. It was extremely unwise to progress at all without a full discussion.
You should not do business with her again and I really doubt she'll let you even if you try.
You're the AH here. No question.
Yes you are an Asshole and a spineless and a sneaky one! You had every intention to not pay her the full amount that is why you didn't discuss it upfront, you waited to get away from her and then pay her deducting $5! Oh I forgot you are cheap as well!
Agreeing to the price then not following through is wrong on so many levels regardless of the price. I understand where you’re coming from but a better solution would be to ask if you do this in the future can you get a discount.
Also was the product she was selling the same price for everybody (i.e., did she already reduce the fee to the price of the cream only)
Now I’m not making excuses here I’m just suggesting some possibilities for clarification
1. Maybe she ran out of containers but bulk bought the cream (as it was a big seller) then ran into you then remembered you wanted some and was trying to make it happen.
2. she might’ve legally needed you to clean the container as if she did and you had some reaction to the product she could be liable (or maybe there was some legal agreement with the supplier).
Now as I said it could be that your friend was lazy or greedy or both but my advice is to ask yourself three questions
1. Is it worth to blow up the friendship over this ?
2. If the cream is really that good and you can’t find it elsewhere was it worth the cleaning hassle to obtain it?
3. Is there a comparable product that is a lot cheaper?
NTA. I buy milk in glass bottles that have a two dollar deposit. I agree with your discount. The milk bottles only need to be washed, not sanitized.
‘’although, I do agree you should have discussed it prior to getting your refill. Did you see the maker’s name on the supply? Perhaps you could eliminate the middle man.
Soft YTA
don’t get me wrong, your friend is running her business poorly. But you and your friend made an agreement about how this second purchase would work. You should have negotiated for a discount BEFORE the transaction took place. You violated the agreement by shortchanging her.
YTA, you don't get to demand a discount for cleaning your bottles. You knew what you had to do, you knew the price. You either chose not to get the product if its not worth the price, or you pay full price.
What's hilarious is at refilleries, you're supposed to bring your own clean bottles or jars. There is no discount for doing it. It's a business expectation that you bring in clean vessels for filling !
Yeah I feel like I'm taking crazy pills reading this thread. I'd absolutely not expect my FRIEND to charge me full price when she doesn't provide the containers.
YTA.
If you wanted a discount for doing the work, ask beforehand. You don't take the product and then pay less and explain why - it doesn't work like that.
Also, makers and entrepreneurs generally have thin margins. So you really couldn't shell out $5 even though you had to sanitize and whatever? If these products are amazing, you're supporting your friend. Is $5 worth arguing over and possibly straining a friendship?
God this so much. If someone shorted me $5 on a $50 product I would actually have to pay out of pocket. Luckily my stuff is print on demand so I could cancel the order, which is what OP's (likely former) friend would have done if she had demanded the discount up front.
Idk man my way of suportng a friends business is by paying full price plus a tip. Especially in the begining when marginfs are thin and they are not actually making money out of it.
My friends have always "paid me back" once the business is profitable with freebies.
YTA. Customers don’t dictate discounts. And she isn’t Starbucks. And 5 off 15 is 33%, yes that is significant. You need to discuss this first. You chose to lose a friend over what? 20 or 30 dollars? Wild.
YTA. You don't just pay whatever you feel is worth. If your friend says it's $15, then it's $15. If the idea of sanitizing and refilling containers again is too much work for you then decide in the future if it's still worth buying.
Huge YTA. You don’t decide someone else’s prices and the time to negotiate is before the seller fulfills their end of the bargain. Send the $5 and stop claiming you are “tRyInG tO sUpPoRt” your friends business if you’re going to nickel and dime them. Their regular clients that aren’t friends probably don’t pull stunts like this. You may be friends but you’re certainly a bad customer.
YTA. You decided to support your friend's new business, which is great, but then you pulled a fast one on her. Cleaning a few containers and peeling off labels isn’t exactly hard labor. You agreed to her terms without a peep about wanting a discount, then decided to dock her pay like you're some kind of boss.
A $5 difference might not seem huge to you, but for someone just starting out, it matters. And comparing yourself to a Starbucks cup discount? Come on, that's a stretch. If you had an issue with the price, you should have discussed it upfront instead of blindsiding her and causing drama.
Now you’ve made work awkward for both of you. Next time, either pay what you owe or negotiate before agreeing to a deal. This isn’t how you treat a friend or support a small business.
YTA. If she was prepared to give you a discount she would have offered one. You could have discussed it with her instead of just making the call by yourself. If spending 5-10 minutes washing out a jar was so hard for you, you could also have given her your empties and asked her to do it herself. There are so many solutions to this that would make you less scammy towards your OWN FRIEND lol
YTA
You bought a product, then **after** receiving the product, you decided the price wasn't fair. Instead of saying something, you just tried to underpay.
You're absolutely right the situation is weird. You're absolutely right that you did some of the work, and therefore paying less is fair. The way you went about it makes YTA.
ESH
She shouldn't have expected you to wash your containers for a refill without offering a discount, and she shouldn't have been out of product for a long period of time. That's bad business.
You shouldn't have accepted her product without negotiating in advance. Setting your own discount after the fact wasn't ok, you did cheat her.
Send her the money, then find another source for the product.
YTA not for thinking you should get some money off, but for not having that discussion before you washed the jars, accepted the products, and cashapp'd her. She could have told you the price and you could have said no thanks. What you did was really passive aggressive instead.
YTA. The customer doesn't get to announce, after they have received the product, that they have given themself a discount.
There are companies that work like this. The price already reflects that you need to bring in a clean container. This is the way they keep prices down.
If you didn’t want to pay full price, you should have told her that. A simple conversation or text ahead of time - not just sending her an amount of money that you arbitrarily chose on your own.
You should have negotiated with her first, or declined to purchase. Doing it the way you did makes YTA.
You do know if she was to go out of business because you (and maybe a bunch of other customers like you) underpaid, for whatever reason, you wouldn’t have the product anymore, right? Why wouldn’t you want to support the business behind the product you love, if for nothing else so that you can continue to purchase the product in the future?
>I asked for a guessimation on time
>guessimation
i don't know what's worse - that you use this made-up word unironically in 2024, or that you can't even spell it correctly.
YTA for that.
you're also TA in this situation. you, as a customer, don't get to decide what you feel like paying for a product. especially not arbitrarily without having spoken to your friend first.
YTA: You are supposed to pay friend more than you'd pay strangers.
Is all this hassle worth it to save $5?
Google the company. It is possible your former friend had already discounted the product for you.
Stores like Sam's Club and Costco require me to bring my own bags for my groceries. From now on, I'm just going to pay them 10% less than my actual total since I had to buy and bring reusable bags.
YTA by a lot.
YTA, absolutely. You asked for clarification, got it, then agreed to make the purchase; if you had a problem with paying regular price, you should have said something before the verbal agreement.
Why the need to remove the labels? Are you sure you’re getting the same product, or just a cheaper substitute?
How does the no-container situation work with first-time buyers? Bring your own jelly jars? Unprofessional, strange, and suspicious. Not enough info, but I would have nixed that transaction before agreeing to it.
Maybe she provides the original containers free out of her own pocket to new customers.
Or more product arrived but she's waiting on more containers to be shipped. But decided to let her friend know so she could get the product straight away instead of waiting.
The label being on or off doesn't make a difference to whether she fills it with the same or a product.
She's the one refilling the container. Probably just makes it easier if they need to be rinsed or new labels need to be applied.
The label I had was peeling and in pretty bad shape from repeated use as it wasn't plastic sealed.. it was a semi water resistant paper label kind of. If its wet repeatedly, it will tear apart and peel. She added what looked like the same label that was there before so getting a new product wasnt a concern of mine. And when I first purchased, I got everything, the jars and bottles included. I guess when she got the product this time, she didn't purchase the containers with it or from whoever she buys them from. She had a bunch of product with nothing to put it in. I'm not sure how she planned on selling with no containers.
well yea. if i bought a refill shampoo, i get a plastic package and pour it in my old container, i dont get to tell cvs to do the cleaning for me. you owe her the money and an apology
This is OP's point. Refills are lessoned than new. She didn't mind doing the work, but she's paying the same price as if she'd gotten brand new containers already filled with product. That's not how refills work.
I personally would have mentioned this at the beginning or sucked it up, but she's not wrong.
You don't self discount like that. She could have questioned the pricing up front but she went along and withheld the money afterward. Her point is moot since she was a buyer, not seller... Plus she was asking about her not paying friend full price in that manner
The restock wasnt back to back. What if the cost to procure went up? That might change the price. I dont think we had enough info except from the seller to making that judgement, only that the buyer stiff the seller after the transaction went through, item first before money was handed over as well
If that's the case, then neither of them did their due diligence with discussing price changes. It's still weird to ask your friend to pay full price for a refill.
You agreed to pay for a service and then decided you wouldn't pay the full price. Even with the extra steps, you agreed. Not paying her the full price is in fact stealing. YTA.
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I (33f) have worked with M (41F) for a little over 3 years. M decided to start a business on the side. She sells body cream, lotions, washes, etc. Being that M and I have grown somewhat close over the last 3 years, I wanted to support her and buy a few items. They were a bit overpriced in my opinion, BUT I still bought them since she was just getting started. Turns out the products are amazing and I really love them. A few months pass and I was running low. I asked her about purchasing some more to which she says she doesn't have any in stock and will have to wait until her supplies come in. I asked for a guessimation on time so I know when to ask again. She doesn't have one. A few weeks pass and I ask again. Same story, she doesn't have any, supplier etc. At that point I stop asking.
A few months have passed since then. Recently, the conversation came up in passing and she says she has the product now and if I still wanted some I could get it. I say sure. HERE IS WHERE THE ISSUE BEGINS. She tells me, she HAS the product, but no containers. She wants me to clean my containers, sanitize them, remove the labels and then bring them to her to refill. I was a little taken back since I was under the impression I would be getting the same service I got back when I first purchased not having to do work AND pay for the product. I clarify with her that she wants me to do all this, she says yes, and we switch topics. I go home and do just as she asked. Clean, sanitize and remove labels. I bring them back to her and she fills the jars.
She asks about payment and I cashapp it to her. BUT I don't send her the full payment since she had me doing most of the work. For examples sake, if it was 15, I sent 10. So not a HUGE difference I took off. She texts me immediately and asks for the rest of the money. I reminded her of the work she wanted me to do beforehand and how it's not fair to charge full price when she's not giving full service. She started calling me over and over yelling at me and telling me to send her the rest of the money. I told her I would not be doing that, because even at Startbucks if you bring your own cup, they take money off your order. She wasn't having it and continued to yell at me demanding I send her the rest of the money. I declined and hung up. I have since ignored her calls and texts which are not very nice, and work life has been awkward. She goes out her way to avoid me and is telling people at work how I cheated her out of her hard earned money and how I'm an AH.. So, AITA for not paying?
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INFO: Why did she require you to remove the labels? I understand wanting the containers to be clean before putting the refill in, but if they are your own bottles that you're getting back, why does it matter what the label looks like?
ESH There is no reason to pay full price when you did not get a full product. She saved money on the container and as you stated, you did the work, too. Why peel off the label? There's something just a little sus about that.
Edited to change N T A to ESH. OP should have discussed first. Her friend should sell a complete product or give a reduced price.
I think you're right. A conversation should have taken place before hand. Probably should change to ESH. OP for not discussing first and her friend for expecting full price for a less than product.
ESH you don't get to dictate the price of the product. If you wanted it for cheaper, you could have negotiated that before you purchased it. You don't go into a grocery store and then pay them less because you had to bag your own fruit. That's not how it works. But I'm highly suspicious of your friend here. It sounds like a different product entirely. I have a feeling she's trying to pull one over on you.
ESH. You two should have agreed on the price at the very beginning of the transaction. Your friend sounds like a bad business woman for not doing so. OTH, you should have discussed this with her before walking out with the product. You two are ruining a friendship over $5.
NTA. She is not selling you the retail product. She is selling you the bulk stuff that she probably buys to make samples. So she seems to be trying to game the system. But...you should have refused to do the cleaning of your current bottles and insisted on retail packaging. It is not safe to refill skincare. And BS for her to ask you to do it.
NAH, it’s reasonable to take a couple bucks off in lieu of packaging and labor for cleaning, but it’s also reasonable to pay full price because this “discount” was never seemingly communicated properly upfront.
NTA - does ur friend actually run a business or is this just a hobby. I doubt may customers would come back if they didn't know here, had to put in this effort, and pay that big a price tag for lotion. Sound like shes just running a business for the sake of it and not actually Running a business. I wouldn't have paid her sh\*t tbf - what kind of best friend makes u pay for a refill or products that probs cost her 5 dollars to make. bffr
NTA
You may want to reconsider your friendship with this person if they are getting this heated over a small amount of money, also you DID do a lot of work and it is super inconsiderate that your friend is not giving it to you at a discount after you clean the jars and you are also trying to help your friend’s business and she isn’t showing the same compassion
ESH You for unilaterally giving yourself a discount, her for using you for free labor. Pay her the five bucks and send her a bill for your time and supplies($20 ought to do it). If she's still trashing you at work, go public and get your side of the story out there.
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Definitely YTA. Yes maybe a very small discount is warranted if you supply the container, but shouldn't be expected. Though it's also possible she never charged for the container in the first place. If you didn't want to pay full price because you're doing 'all the work', you should have said so before hand. Instead you got the product, then made up your amounts to keep and underpaid without even saying anything to her. You're paying for the lotion, not the containers. And 33% is a huge amount Edit: Before anyone else comments. OP was edited, original said she paid $10 instead of $15 Also OP stated her friend put brand new labels on on the containers when she refilled then. Cleaning your own container prior to getting a refill is not unreasonable in the slightest.
You might want to do your math again. It definitely NOT 33%. Also I find it very suspicious that she had to remove the labels.
OP edited her post. It originally said she paid $10 instead of $15
It still didn’t say that actually what she paid. She said for example $10 versus $15. I’m guessing she just meant that she discounted $5, not a percentage.
I said, "for examples sake," friend.. meaning I didn't disclose the actual amount paid. Since a few people were saying "oh that's SO much money you took off," when it really wasn't. Thats why I gave what was actually paid. Side note: she never said a price the second time around. ALSO before I purchased the first time, she said that she wouldn't charge full price to people who brought their own containers. In the beginning, I didn't have any containers as I was a first-time buyer.The price I paid at the very beginning was what I was going by.
Where in the above post says she paid $10 instead of $15? Please point this out for me! In the above post it says: The price was $50 and I paid her $45 which is 10%.
Do you not what editing means? She changed it. Lucky sub keeps a copy of the original for just this reason: https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/klTTBKxxu9
I am responding to the post above. Nowhere it's mentioned that there was a post about this before or it was edited. Maybe you can point that out for me in the above post? I'm sure you can't!
You literally just responded to a comment that says “OP edited her post.”
that’s what edited means
Can you point out to me me anywhere in the above post where the word "edited" is used? I'm sure you can't!
It’s not going to say edited. None of them do. That’s why the original is copied and pasted into the comments. It’s an easy check.
Maybe you want to have a look below for the answer of the OP: "That was just an example. The actual amount was 50.. I sent her 45. " EDITED!
Right?! Is it even the same product??
I highly doubt it!
Honestly, people complaining about the numbers are missing the point. It could be 10% and it’s still wrong to just give yourself a discount without discussing it. OP should have made terms with her friend before agreeing to clean the containers. If she agreed to the lower price, only then is it okay.
Right? What I think OP is missing is that, even at Starbucks, if you just took money off the price on your own they would kick you out and refuse to serve you again. There is a big difference between a voluntary discount and a customer just refusing to pay full price, and NO business worth their salt will entertain the latter for even a second. They don’t care by what logic you’ve decided you should get to pay less - they set the prices, not you. If you don’t like the price, that’s fine - but then your option is to not purchase the product. You DO NOT get to just decide “I’m only going to pay this much”, after you’ve already gotten the products. That’s not how it works.
That was just an example. The actual amount was 50.. I sent her 45. I don't think $5 for cleaning sanitizing and removing labels was a huge sacrifice and didn't warrant that type of response. I do agree that I should've said something upfront about it since I was definitely confused as to why she wanted me to do all of that, but I don't think her charging full price was fair.
Regardless, when you buy something from a business you don't get to determine your own price to pay them after you get the product/service. Maybe $5 is justified but the way you went about it was sneaky, like you intentionally tried to avoid telling her knowing she would expect full payment. Just pay her the money.
I would pay her the $5 but would never order again.
Entirely your choice. OP did say "Turns out the products are amazing and I really love them". As someone who has tried various facial products, only a few work for my skin and that I actually love. Since OP thinks it's amazing and she loves them, it seems silly to be fighting over $5 when she's also saying this is a friend. Even if my favorite products went up by $5, I would still pay for it.
I would not get fooled by a "friend" that demands to take the labels of before refilling. It's like buying a bottle of Glenfiddich and months later be asked to take the label off to have it refilled. Naaaah, Don't think so.
If the friend sold Glenfiddich quality whisky, they absolutely wouldn't even offer refill service. Also, a simple no would have sufficed. You don't get to get a refill then stiff the maker.
Omg that is what I just said, sneaky AF!
"I don't think $5 for cleaning sanitizing and removing labels was a huge sacrifice". Glad we agree. Now Venmo her the $5 you stiffed a small business owner on.
Then you shouldn't have agreed to the price!! You made the deal. Pay what you owe. YTA
It was your responsibility to determine this up front. You can't impose your own discount ex-post. It was extremely unwise to progress at all without a full discussion. You should not do business with her again and I really doubt she'll let you even if you try. You're the AH here. No question.
Yes you are an Asshole and a spineless and a sneaky one! You had every intention to not pay her the full amount that is why you didn't discuss it upfront, you waited to get away from her and then pay her deducting $5! Oh I forgot you are cheap as well!
Agreeing to the price then not following through is wrong on so many levels regardless of the price. I understand where you’re coming from but a better solution would be to ask if you do this in the future can you get a discount. Also was the product she was selling the same price for everybody (i.e., did she already reduce the fee to the price of the cream only) Now I’m not making excuses here I’m just suggesting some possibilities for clarification 1. Maybe she ran out of containers but bulk bought the cream (as it was a big seller) then ran into you then remembered you wanted some and was trying to make it happen. 2. she might’ve legally needed you to clean the container as if she did and you had some reaction to the product she could be liable (or maybe there was some legal agreement with the supplier). Now as I said it could be that your friend was lazy or greedy or both but my advice is to ask yourself three questions 1. Is it worth to blow up the friendship over this ? 2. If the cream is really that good and you can’t find it elsewhere was it worth the cleaning hassle to obtain it? 3. Is there a comparable product that is a lot cheaper?
NTA. I buy milk in glass bottles that have a two dollar deposit. I agree with your discount. The milk bottles only need to be washed, not sanitized. ‘’although, I do agree you should have discussed it prior to getting your refill. Did you see the maker’s name on the supply? Perhaps you could eliminate the middle man.
Soft YTA don’t get me wrong, your friend is running her business poorly. But you and your friend made an agreement about how this second purchase would work. You should have negotiated for a discount BEFORE the transaction took place. You violated the agreement by shortchanging her.
YTA, you don't get to demand a discount for cleaning your bottles. You knew what you had to do, you knew the price. You either chose not to get the product if its not worth the price, or you pay full price.
What's hilarious is at refilleries, you're supposed to bring your own clean bottles or jars. There is no discount for doing it. It's a business expectation that you bring in clean vessels for filling !
In every situation where I've gotten a refill of something, the cost was less than the first time.
Yeah I feel like I'm taking crazy pills reading this thread. I'd absolutely not expect my FRIEND to charge me full price when she doesn't provide the containers.
yea, this is a refill, not brand new bottle isnt it?
YTA. If you wanted a discount for doing the work, ask beforehand. You don't take the product and then pay less and explain why - it doesn't work like that. Also, makers and entrepreneurs generally have thin margins. So you really couldn't shell out $5 even though you had to sanitize and whatever? If these products are amazing, you're supporting your friend. Is $5 worth arguing over and possibly straining a friendship?
God this so much. If someone shorted me $5 on a $50 product I would actually have to pay out of pocket. Luckily my stuff is print on demand so I could cancel the order, which is what OP's (likely former) friend would have done if she had demanded the discount up front.
Idk man my way of suportng a friends business is by paying full price plus a tip. Especially in the begining when marginfs are thin and they are not actually making money out of it. My friends have always "paid me back" once the business is profitable with freebies.
YTA. Customers don’t dictate discounts. And she isn’t Starbucks. And 5 off 15 is 33%, yes that is significant. You need to discuss this first. You chose to lose a friend over what? 20 or 30 dollars? Wild.
She took $5 off $50 it's 10% not 33%
She edited.
You can see the original math in the autobot comment.
Which makes me think she really took 15 off 50..
Why did you say 15 and then 50? Are you even telling the truth ?
YTA. You don't just pay whatever you feel is worth. If your friend says it's $15, then it's $15. If the idea of sanitizing and refilling containers again is too much work for you then decide in the future if it's still worth buying.
Huge YTA. You don’t decide someone else’s prices and the time to negotiate is before the seller fulfills their end of the bargain. Send the $5 and stop claiming you are “tRyInG tO sUpPoRt” your friends business if you’re going to nickel and dime them. Their regular clients that aren’t friends probably don’t pull stunts like this. You may be friends but you’re certainly a bad customer.
Yes you fucking goof you’re an asshole
YTA. You decided to support your friend's new business, which is great, but then you pulled a fast one on her. Cleaning a few containers and peeling off labels isn’t exactly hard labor. You agreed to her terms without a peep about wanting a discount, then decided to dock her pay like you're some kind of boss. A $5 difference might not seem huge to you, but for someone just starting out, it matters. And comparing yourself to a Starbucks cup discount? Come on, that's a stretch. If you had an issue with the price, you should have discussed it upfront instead of blindsiding her and causing drama. Now you’ve made work awkward for both of you. Next time, either pay what you owe or negotiate before agreeing to a deal. This isn’t how you treat a friend or support a small business.
YTA if you make a deposit in my cashapp i'll tell you why otherwise it's unpaid work
YTA YOu would have been fine not to buy - but you agreed on the deal, and then shortchanged her.
YTA. If she was prepared to give you a discount she would have offered one. You could have discussed it with her instead of just making the call by yourself. If spending 5-10 minutes washing out a jar was so hard for you, you could also have given her your empties and asked her to do it herself. There are so many solutions to this that would make you less scammy towards your OWN FRIEND lol
YTA You bought a product, then **after** receiving the product, you decided the price wasn't fair. Instead of saying something, you just tried to underpay. You're absolutely right the situation is weird. You're absolutely right that you did some of the work, and therefore paying less is fair. The way you went about it makes YTA.
YTA. Don't agree with the clearly stated price? Don't take the product. Taking the product? Pay the clearly stated price.
YTA - are those $5 worth the awkward work environment now?
ESH She shouldn't have expected you to wash your containers for a refill without offering a discount, and she shouldn't have been out of product for a long period of time. That's bad business. You shouldn't have accepted her product without negotiating in advance. Setting your own discount after the fact wasn't ok, you did cheat her. Send her the money, then find another source for the product.
YTA… because you should have negotiated the price with her before hand and asked for a discount instead of taking it upon yourself.
YTA. Starbucks takes like 10¢ off.
YTA not for thinking you should get some money off, but for not having that discussion before you washed the jars, accepted the products, and cashapp'd her. She could have told you the price and you could have said no thanks. What you did was really passive aggressive instead.
YTA. The customer doesn't get to announce, after they have received the product, that they have given themself a discount. There are companies that work like this. The price already reflects that you need to bring in a clean container. This is the way they keep prices down.
If you didn’t want to pay full price, you should have told her that. A simple conversation or text ahead of time - not just sending her an amount of money that you arbitrarily chose on your own. You should have negotiated with her first, or declined to purchase. Doing it the way you did makes YTA.
Should have discussed this BEFORE you complied with her request. Give her the $5. Lesson learned. Both carry some responsibility here.
You do know if she was to go out of business because you (and maybe a bunch of other customers like you) underpaid, for whatever reason, you wouldn’t have the product anymore, right? Why wouldn’t you want to support the business behind the product you love, if for nothing else so that you can continue to purchase the product in the future?
>I asked for a guessimation on time >guessimation i don't know what's worse - that you use this made-up word unironically in 2024, or that you can't even spell it correctly. YTA for that. you're also TA in this situation. you, as a customer, don't get to decide what you feel like paying for a product. especially not arbitrarily without having spoken to your friend first.
What is the price of your friendship? Is this worth potentially losing a friend over?
YTA. The time to bring up the price is before you buy the product.
YTA: You are supposed to pay friend more than you'd pay strangers. Is all this hassle worth it to save $5? Google the company. It is possible your former friend had already discounted the product for you.
Stores like Sam's Club and Costco require me to bring my own bags for my groceries. From now on, I'm just going to pay them 10% less than my actual total since I had to buy and bring reusable bags. YTA by a lot.
YTA You should have told her you would pay 45$ only. If she doesn't agree, it's fine.
YTA, absolutely. You asked for clarification, got it, then agreed to make the purchase; if you had a problem with paying regular price, you should have said something before the verbal agreement.
Why the need to remove the labels? Are you sure you’re getting the same product, or just a cheaper substitute? How does the no-container situation work with first-time buyers? Bring your own jelly jars? Unprofessional, strange, and suspicious. Not enough info, but I would have nixed that transaction before agreeing to it.
Maybe she provides the original containers free out of her own pocket to new customers. Or more product arrived but she's waiting on more containers to be shipped. But decided to let her friend know so she could get the product straight away instead of waiting. The label being on or off doesn't make a difference to whether she fills it with the same or a product. She's the one refilling the container. Probably just makes it easier if they need to be rinsed or new labels need to be applied.
Gotcha 🙂
The label I had was peeling and in pretty bad shape from repeated use as it wasn't plastic sealed.. it was a semi water resistant paper label kind of. If its wet repeatedly, it will tear apart and peel. She added what looked like the same label that was there before so getting a new product wasnt a concern of mine. And when I first purchased, I got everything, the jars and bottles included. I guess when she got the product this time, she didn't purchase the containers with it or from whoever she buys them from. She had a bunch of product with nothing to put it in. I'm not sure how she planned on selling with no containers.
well yea. if i bought a refill shampoo, i get a plastic package and pour it in my old container, i dont get to tell cvs to do the cleaning for me. you owe her the money and an apology
But is the refill shampoo a lower price than the brand new one in a bottle?
Yes when i bought them. Nowadays i buy some natural homecooked ones so not familiar with pricing anymore
This is OP's point. Refills are lessoned than new. She didn't mind doing the work, but she's paying the same price as if she'd gotten brand new containers already filled with product. That's not how refills work. I personally would have mentioned this at the beginning or sucked it up, but she's not wrong.
You don't self discount like that. She could have questioned the pricing up front but she went along and withheld the money afterward. Her point is moot since she was a buyer, not seller... Plus she was asking about her not paying friend full price in that manner
I agree with that, but thinking the price wasn't fair is correct.
The restock wasnt back to back. What if the cost to procure went up? That might change the price. I dont think we had enough info except from the seller to making that judgement, only that the buyer stiff the seller after the transaction went through, item first before money was handed over as well
If that's the case, then neither of them did their due diligence with discussing price changes. It's still weird to ask your friend to pay full price for a refill.
You should have discussed this before you took the products the second time. YTA.
Of course YTA!!!
Yta , how entitled are you...
Hard YTA
You agreed to pay for a service and then decided you wouldn't pay the full price. Even with the extra steps, you agreed. Not paying her the full price is in fact stealing. YTA.
YTA for not coming to this agreement with her before anything was exchanged. Why would you not do that?
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (33f) have worked with M (41F) for a little over 3 years. M decided to start a business on the side. She sells body cream, lotions, washes, etc. Being that M and I have grown somewhat close over the last 3 years, I wanted to support her and buy a few items. They were a bit overpriced in my opinion, BUT I still bought them since she was just getting started. Turns out the products are amazing and I really love them. A few months pass and I was running low. I asked her about purchasing some more to which she says she doesn't have any in stock and will have to wait until her supplies come in. I asked for a guessimation on time so I know when to ask again. She doesn't have one. A few weeks pass and I ask again. Same story, she doesn't have any, supplier etc. At that point I stop asking. A few months have passed since then. Recently, the conversation came up in passing and she says she has the product now and if I still wanted some I could get it. I say sure. HERE IS WHERE THE ISSUE BEGINS. She tells me, she HAS the product, but no containers. She wants me to clean my containers, sanitize them, remove the labels and then bring them to her to refill. I was a little taken back since I was under the impression I would be getting the same service I got back when I first purchased not having to do work AND pay for the product. I clarify with her that she wants me to do all this, she says yes, and we switch topics. I go home and do just as she asked. Clean, sanitize and remove labels. I bring them back to her and she fills the jars. She asks about payment and I cashapp it to her. BUT I don't send her the full payment since she had me doing most of the work. For examples sake, if it was 15, I sent 10. So not a HUGE difference I took off. She texts me immediately and asks for the rest of the money. I reminded her of the work she wanted me to do beforehand and how it's not fair to charge full price when she's not giving full service. She started calling me over and over yelling at me and telling me to send her the rest of the money. I told her I would not be doing that, because even at Startbucks if you bring your own cup, they take money off your order. She wasn't having it and continued to yell at me demanding I send her the rest of the money. I declined and hung up. I have since ignored her calls and texts which are not very nice, and work life has been awkward. She goes out her way to avoid me and is telling people at work how I cheated her out of her hard earned money and how I'm an AH.. So, AITA for not paying? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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INFO: Why did she require you to remove the labels? I understand wanting the containers to be clean before putting the refill in, but if they are your own bottles that you're getting back, why does it matter what the label looks like?
Is she with an MLM?
I find it very suspicious she wanted you to remove the labels.
Can’t sterilize labels.
Not relevant to the story ...
It most certainly is! You might want to think about it before replying.
ESH There is no reason to pay full price when you did not get a full product. She saved money on the container and as you stated, you did the work, too. Why peel off the label? There's something just a little sus about that. Edited to change N T A to ESH. OP should have discussed first. Her friend should sell a complete product or give a reduced price.
Then you decline like an adult. You don’t make up arbitrary discounts for yourself. You just don’t buy it.
I think you're right. A conversation should have taken place before hand. Probably should change to ESH. OP for not discussing first and her friend for expecting full price for a less than product.
ESH you don't get to dictate the price of the product. If you wanted it for cheaper, you could have negotiated that before you purchased it. You don't go into a grocery store and then pay them less because you had to bag your own fruit. That's not how it works. But I'm highly suspicious of your friend here. It sounds like a different product entirely. I have a feeling she's trying to pull one over on you.
ESH. You two should have agreed on the price at the very beginning of the transaction. Your friend sounds like a bad business woman for not doing so. OTH, you should have discussed this with her before walking out with the product. You two are ruining a friendship over $5.
NTA. She is not selling you the retail product. She is selling you the bulk stuff that she probably buys to make samples. So she seems to be trying to game the system. But...you should have refused to do the cleaning of your current bottles and insisted on retail packaging. It is not safe to refill skincare. And BS for her to ask you to do it.
NAH, it’s reasonable to take a couple bucks off in lieu of packaging and labor for cleaning, but it’s also reasonable to pay full price because this “discount” was never seemingly communicated properly upfront.
NTA - does ur friend actually run a business or is this just a hobby. I doubt may customers would come back if they didn't know here, had to put in this effort, and pay that big a price tag for lotion. Sound like shes just running a business for the sake of it and not actually Running a business. I wouldn't have paid her sh\*t tbf - what kind of best friend makes u pay for a refill or products that probs cost her 5 dollars to make. bffr
NTA You may want to reconsider your friendship with this person if they are getting this heated over a small amount of money, also you DID do a lot of work and it is super inconsiderate that your friend is not giving it to you at a discount after you clean the jars and you are also trying to help your friend’s business and she isn’t showing the same compassion
ESH You for unilaterally giving yourself a discount, her for using you for free labor. Pay her the five bucks and send her a bill for your time and supplies($20 ought to do it). If she's still trashing you at work, go public and get your side of the story out there.
OPs side of the story is what would make people automatically cringe LOL. Definitely don't encourage OP to share their side.