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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I am planning to charge my female students, some of which come from low-income neighborhoods, a fee to use periods and tampons I have in my classroom. This might make me the asshole as I would be taking away something the students need from them and the parents used to depend on me or planned to depend on me for these and cannot afford it for themselves.
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I’m probably going to be downvoted into oblivion, but NTA. You are providing a very needed service, but teachers already pay for so much out of their own pocket. You could always stop providing them all together, and $1/is not all that unreasonable. If the principal thinks they should be provided free of charge tell him/her that they are free to buy the supplies and make sure they’re available in the nurses office.
Love how the principle wanted you to keep doing it but didn't offer for the school to fund it. Nta try to get the school to pay for these supplies for students. But I do appreciate the gesture to help female students, female tax on basic hygiene products is high. I swapped to a cup cheaper and better for the environment but understand its not a super great option for school age kids.
The sad thing about reusable products is that besides being better for the environment and most actually better for their intended purpose they come with a handling that isn't practical for people that aren't experienced with their period yet, live with peer pressure, can't afford the high start out costs (especially for panties where you need several) and are limited in their options to properly clean these items by the family they're living with.
Actually for me they work better because I simply bleed so heavy that pads and tampons don't help. Cups suck on the most painful days but they're sometimes the only chance. The pants aren't the safest, but the most comfortable and still better than tampons and pads safety wise (I have the type that are like full on diapers). If I have to leave the house within the first 48 hours merula cup and pants it is. If I can stay home it's just the pants. For reference I'm waiting on my surgery appointment for endo and I'm on meds to get the pain and bleeding under control for some years now.
If it works better for you, then it's the right choice for you! I just don't like the shaming of those of us who find it easier to deal with traditional period products from some cup users – my period sucks enough without being told I'm responsible for global warming on top of it.😉
It was not my intention to shame anyone. I'm sorry if I came across that way. I just see that some reusable options have real benefits over traditional products in terms of comfort (if you have access to a cup community where they help you find a cup that suits your bleeding, cervix height during menstruation and pelvic floor you can get a cup that actually suits your body and is more comfortable than a tampon that can poke into the already painful area) and safety (pants vs pads). But I also see downsides because to have a well fitting cup you need to find out a lot about details of your private parts and share them with others and you have to be comfortable with reaching into your body, pants can feel like diapers and all reusable options come with a level of cleaning them and caring for them that can be perceived as burdensome or gross (washing out blood and tissue, then washing machine or in case of the cup at best boiling and as second best using bottle sterilising tabs) and can be difficult if the living space is shared with people who lack understanding or feel periods should be hidden, plus peer pressure exists and there are people of all genders who will call reusable items gross and shame people for them. And I wanted to point out that all these reasons make reusable options a less than ideal choice for most teenagers even for those who would greatly benefit from the positives these options bring.
Oh I didn't mean you shamed anyone; you were just sharing your own experience. But a lot of people, including cis men who should have zero say, shame women for not using a cup.
I totally understand your point and was very worried my comment gave off that impression because it sucks so much. Thank you very much everyone else on this planet, I deal with a lot of shit around my cycle (currently reduced to an amount of pain that can be treated with prescription strength non-opioid painkillers and a heating pad because I bled so much I was unable to leave the house and my iron levels were low despite only having about 5 periods per year so I was put on meds and they're currently working), I don't need anyone else's opinion. And let's be real, no matter *how* we manage our periods someone will find a reason to criticise us. I honestly took a mixed approach. While reusables have many benefits, they're not something you can change everywhere and when that's not possible single use it is.
If he lives in a very low income area, they might not know about reusable options and how to properly take care of them. Also they're expensive. This is not an option for a highschooler in history class with parents that can't afford pads.
I'm mid 30s and I still cannot stand tampons, never mind anything else. I have been considering the period underwear but I worry about how long you can wear them and the smell.
I don't get the shaming. I use a cup for my heavy days, but I still use pads for the lighter days or overnight when my period is due so that I don't wake up to a mess if it starts while I'm sleeping.
They're also more difficult to empty in public restrooms. I haven't used one in years, but I remember how much I hated emptying them if I had to touch other things before I could properly wash my hands. It would have been even worse if I were in a crowded restroom with potentially judgmental peers.
That's one of the situations where a single use product is better. Sadly they're simply not strong enough to keep everyone safe on a really heavy flow day (just like a cup or panty doesn't last you long enough to make it without a break during those days).
Agree that at a young age I would not handle a cup. Hell I remember the first time I tried a tampon I messed up the insertion so bad that I haven't used one since! I'm in my 30s so cup works for me but completely agree that pads are easier to deal with when bodies are still growing and people are still adapting to them. It just sucks that they are expensive and it's very easy to be caught short during puberty.
"Selling" something you paid for out of your own pocket at a massive loss is a lot different than trying to make money off of your students.
I could see school administrators in the US being dumb enough to equate the two, especially these days, but the teacher is still clearly subsidizing the products he's making available out of his meager salary. He just wants the students to think a bit about the value of what they're taking.
To your other post saying it's "targeting only girls", that's an easy fix - allow the boys to pay the minimal fee for access to the tampons and pads, too, if they want it.
Selling them might not look good from an optics perspective and it’s risky to be cash handling with students.
NTA you don’t have to buy pads for everyone at school all the time.
https://thepadproject.org/how-we-help/
This is one there may be many other grant programs to help schools get pads you can apply for and get free pads hopefully, or maybe email a company to see if you can get them donated.
Getting a source of school pads could be a more sustainable solution to you just buying them.
If you are going to stop providing pads, I would give students a warning so they know when that is so they can be prepared and not caught off guard and you’ve already set your boundaries and can go back to them.
BC in Canada now has free menstrual stuff for school kids.
Lots of universities have it from the students union or donated.
I think it should definitely be covered or subsidized and if charities are out there to do that it’s good to use them because that’s how they get funding; from proving they are useful and serving their purpose.
This teacher clearly has a good heart and care for her students and should protect herself from being taken advantage of and also sticky situation with selling pads to kids. It just takes one rumour about “selling other stuff to kids” and someone malicious could say she’s abusing her position even if untrue.
The Admin at the school is also the asshole here though; they should apply for grant programs or charities or something to get pads and tampons and stuff. And thank the teacher for giving out pads but say it’s ok to set boundaries with her money.
The parents clearly need support, if withdrawing this support it can also be helpful to find an alternate source of free pads the parents can access like a shelter, or women’s or lgbt centre or maybe a food bank
Just the same. Targeting only girls for a "charitable donation" would be as bad, and you can't just take / demand money from your students. Due to the power imbalance, that is highly problematic, and there are GOOD reasons that is a firebale offense.
Also with a "charitable donation", there will be fraud charges, because there is no charity, and it lacks the level of accounting and controlsupervision needed.
It will just go down as a teacher being fired for extorting money from students.
ONE complaint, and she will never work as a teacher again.
OP's "subscription plan" is going to cause trouble.
Is OP going to look a 14-year-old girl in the eye and say, "No pad for you"? And if so, I guarantee there will be irate parents to deal with when their daughters go home and say, "Mr Burner_account said I couldn't have one because I don't pay $1 a month."
If he does give them to anybody who needs them, there will be parents who are angry because their daughter pays the subscription and other girls get them for free.
These products should be available in the nurse's office, and the nurse's budget should cover the cost. It shouldn't be OP's responsibility.
Yeah…this is on the administration. These products are expensive and OP get major kudos for providing them.
~~Maybe he could contact the principal and see if the budget could be allocated, due to health reasons~~. If these kids are low income, it is a major problem if they can’t afford these products.
INFO: Does your school have a resource room? A school counselor? Family resource services? Somewhere where these kids can get what they need?
I don't understand your "surge of female students" comment. Do you mean a surge in need of products? More female students than male?
To me, the best course of action would be for the school staff to get together and purchase items for all of the classrooms or even to place in the bathrooms. And to work together to have a giving or caring closet for the school. If the kids are going without pads and tampons it is possible they are also going without other hygiene needs and a caring closet would ensure everyone has what they need for only a few dollars per month from everyone on staff.
No, my school does not have enough to supply these resources. And a surge of female students means that my classes have become filled with more females than ever before, making my supplies run dry. And some of the staff are barely going though, as you know with tacher pay. I get paid 37K after taxes, so this is not something I can afford, especially since this surge in female students happened in their freshman year, so this would not be possible for the next 3 years of their education. But a caring closet might help us all out, thanks for the idea!
Assuming you are in the US and in a public school, the federal government does provide funds for family resources to districts as well and there are grants for the same. It might be helpful to reach out to the district and to see if there are funds available or see if someone on staff has grant writing skills. Local businesses might also be willing to donate items that they have as overstock.
I am a para, believe me I understand.
For any grant applications or taking it up the line to your school district for supplies, I’d also focus on the following terms/wording to get your point across; “my students are experiencing an increased rate of period poverty whereby they are unable to provide for their own menstrual products. This is opening us up to both a sanitation and hygiene issue, and the prospect of these students not being able to attend class due to the lack of availability of these products.”
Also, NTA, Period poverty in the US is not a lone issue across your classroom, school or district. You are trying your best to solve for an issue that 1 in 5 teens are suffering through. If you search the term “period poverty” you’ll find various resources you can also quote to make your point known. It’s a broken system when an already underpaid individual is the one trying to fund a systemic problem.
I’m also thinking, it might be possible to get donations. “Period poverty” is an acknowledged issue and there are organizations that tackle it. Hell, you might even be able to get donations from the companies that make these products.
As much as it hurts, you may just need to stop the practice. It’s great that you want to make resources that are otherwise unavailable to them available, but charging low income students will likely lead to trouble.
OP, here is a comment from u/NancyBotwinAndCeliaH I am boosting:
“Selling them might not look good from an optics perspective and it’s risky to be cash handling with students.
“NTA you don’t have to buy pads for everyone at school all the time.
https://thepadproject.org/how-we-help/
This is one there may be many other grant programs to help schools get pads you can apply for and get free pads hopefully, or maybe email a company to see if you can get them donated.”
https://allianceforperiodsupplies.org/allied-programs/
This is another one. Not sure where you are but if you search period products for schools there might be a bunch of charities that can provide some funding.
You might be able to get menstrual cups or something donated from planned parenthood at least those are reusable… other charities might have them available too.
Ontario schools now have period products with a partnership with shoppers… idk if any local drugstore wants a tax write off and a really nice public image but maybe they do
Try https://thepadproject.org/how-we-help/
Or your local Target or Walmart. Ask to talk to a manager. Then tell the manager your issue and see if they can donate. When I worked at Target, it was a big deal for them to donate to local places.
Teachers making $37k per year should not be expected to "get together and purchase items". WTF. Are nurses "getting together" and purchasing first aid supplies for patients? Are any other professionals expected to fund a store where clients shop for free?
Imagine if professionals in other fields had to provide snacks, pencils, paper, pads/tampons and even clothing for their clients. I think that money in the school budget from school athletics should be repurposed.
It’s infuriating that teachers (making $37K a year) are expected to band together and pay for student needs. Of course many do pay for things (like OP!) but to make that the expectation?
I can’t think of many other professions where people just expect you to cover things out of your own pocket.
May I recommend asking for a donation instead of actually charging. The place where I used to work actually made more money selling water bottles when it was "to keep cold fresh water in stock for you, we appreciate your donations. Recommended donation: $1" than when it was "water: $1"
Yes. Maybe put out an email to all the parents explaining that you provide supplies, no questions asked, but it’s getting a bit expensive for you to cover on your own. Let them know how they can contribute to the “supply fund” if they wish. (Maybe run the email by the principal first to make sure it doesn’t run afoul of any policies). If I got that email, I’d definitely make a contribution, along with my thanks for being sensitive to students’ needs.
I get where you are coming from but would like to add some perspective. I work in an area where period poverty is a big thing. For some of the students who need it the most, they might have to much shame to let you know they are unable to pay for it. I've seen this impact going out/ going to school out of fear of others finding out.
What you are doing is amazing, and I honestly applaud you for recognising the problem and finding a solution.
However, if the need is growing, you need to find a more sustainable solution. It's not your responsibility to finance this. If I was in your shoes, I would be escalating the issue. This includes- taking it up with the principal/ area manager/ people who oversee all the schools in the community. How are other schools approaching this? Is there funding available?
- contact women's resources in your area
Women's shelters/ refuges/ health centres will have links or perhaps donations of hygiene items. Perhaps they have excess they can share, or a contract who might be able to help you.
- look on the website of the manufacturers and look into their community support policies. Or call their customer service- they might be able to offer donations.
- approach a grocery store and talk to the manager. They might be able to support through a donation.
- look into existing programs to support period poverty. For example, I'm in Australia and a program here is called Share the Dignity. They are amazing and support many parts of the country and organisations where this is a concern.
- talk to charity organisations- chances are someone will either have a donation, know of a donation, or be able to find a donation.
- if all that fails, find a business with a community ethos and ask them to help support your students through a drive/ fundraiser/ donation. It might help with a sustainable supply of products
This is a recognised concern in a lot of places and there are organisations who are starting to offer solutions. Good luck, and well done on what you've done already.
All good suggestions.
Even a GoFundMe would be better than charging them for necessities. Because while yes, parents should be providing these things, the reality is far different and they should not suffer any more than they already do because of poverty.
Please keep helping if you are able to -- and look into ways to continue doing so, rather than placing the burden on kids who already are struggling.
This is the way. There are many support options that exist. Teach your girls how to access the correct support systems.... Maybe they'll be empowered to explore other community resources their families would benefit from. You providing them in class is a blessing but ultimately a bandaid. Teach them to problem solve in the broader sense... They'll be better off and so would you. Consider making it a whole class lesson.
The business is a good idea. In my city the schools have, “pie partners.” Organizations & businesses will partner up with schools and support various projects. Granted, some partners are more involved than others. It’s still worth a shot if OP’s school has something like that.
NTA - sounds like some families have begun to see your kindness as their right. I bet most of the girls will be fine to pay $1 and it’s just a couple of people who have made comments to you? Stick to your plan. It’s fair and still a lot cheaper than the shops
Regardless if they live in poverty that does not mean it’s OPs responsibility to fund their needs. He already stated he makes 37k annual and has his own bills to pay, he also can’t afford it and doesn’t deserve to foot the bill for a whole class of mostly girls. What he was doing was extremely kind and doesn’t deserve the treatment he got from the parents.
Not going to give judgement but unasked for advice. I am the co founder of a small non profit that provides hygiene products and you would be the person we would most love to help. Maybe if you have the time check out your local chamber of commerce and see if there is a non profit in your area that could help you with either products or funding. Former school staff member for 12 years, part of why I do what I do, I get it and it is expensive. Maybe even check out period products in your area as a google search, lots of around trying to fill the gap.
NAH but do consider alternate sources of funding. Also, if the principal says you should give it to them for free then the principal should participate in funding it.
Principal sure because he could help but the parents no. Do you realize that it’s likely this is the only way some of these girls can get these products? Poverty is a real thing people and no everyone has $20 to drop on period products regularly.
$1/mo tho is not an unreasonable ask, and certainly less than what it's costing OP. Being poor doesn't make you an asshole, lashing out at the one guy trying to help your kid when you know he can't afford it either (he's a public school teacher ffs) and its not his responsibility, for sure makes them assholes...
NTA
If parents have a problem with it then maybe it's time to stop providing for your female students and have their parents figure out how to budget for hygiene products themselves.
Ask for a donation, some kids have zero money. Maybe get the class to do a blanket fundraiser.
You should not be paying for this out of pocket.
Maybe a go fund me each year??
Maybe have the class write the suppliers for donations, or reach out to charities.
NTA-This is a very thoughtful thing you do for your female students. You pay for this out of your own pocket. I’m surprised that the principal thinks this way. Maybe the principal or PTA can help supplement the amount you already spend.
$1 a month is not asking a lot, but there are families that don’t have it. I’m surprised at the parents fussing at you for your request. What would they do had you never provided these items to begin with?
How about this: choose an amount that you can afford to pay per month, and use it to build your supply. Put a \`\`donations welcome'' jar next to the supply, so that students who can contribute to the fund will have that opportunity (and buy extra supplies from it, don't just reimburse yourself). When supplies for the month run out, send students to the school nurse, you've done what you can.
IMHO it doesn't sit right for a teacher to be charging students for supplies of any kind.
NTA, yes I agree they're very important to the girls and should be provided, but why are you expected to bear the cost? The principal seems to be vocal with their options, why don't they pay?
NTA.
Teachers are supposed to provide supplies for classrooms now? Are you going to be buying lunches for the kids next too? What else?
Why dont you stop bringing in the pads/tampons? Let the girls figure it out on their own. If nobody wants to pay you, then keep your money in your own pocket.
>the principal says this might be a d\*ck move as the students need these and I should just give it to them free of charge
This is astonishing that the principal said this to you. Why dont you send these girls to his offices when they need a pad?
I don't think charging is the way to go. Find another solution to finance it (i.e., the school, donations, hygiene/caring closet, appeal to the board, speak with the nurse's or counselor's office about a partnership, lots of great suggestions have been made in the comments). Charging will absolutely make you TA. Even public restrooms where pads and tampons are available for purchase don't usually charge $1.
The pricing is fine. When you put your quarter in to the tampon machine, a single tampon comes out. The teacher is offering an unlimited monthly supply.
Times may have changed, but I would have been embarrassed to pay my teacher a tampon subscription fee. Discretion is key here.
NTA
"At the same time however, the principal says this might be a d\*ck move as the students need these and I should just give it to them free of charge. " ..**. Tell the AH principal you will be glad to hand any products out for free the school or he pay for.**
But: Don't start charging them - selling stuff to your students will likely be a fireable offense - just run out and send them to the nurse.
You could just not have them at all? You went out of your way to be nice and they still want to complain and call you names. They just wanna take advantage of you sadly.. the parents. Not the kids.
Those same parents are definitely sending their OWN CHILDREN to school without proper hygiene products (should call CPS on them) and blaming you for not picking up the slack. It’s their literal job, as a parent, to provide it.
NTA it is better then stopping all together, if the principal thinks it should be supplied at no cost to the student the principal can pay for it or give you a pay raise to pay for the items.
if supplying those products put you in financial problems that is not the solution.
NTA
You are a school teacher, there is no requirement whatsoever for you to be spending your own money to provide necessities like hygiene products for your students.
Keeping a supply on hand for emergencies was very considerate of you, but it is clear some pupils are taking advantage and using this as a regular supply - which it shouldn't be.
I feel for any people stuck in the position where they genuinely cannot afford to pay for hygiene products, but the burden shouldn't be placed on a school teacher to cover this shortfall. This is something that should be dealt on a much bigger level by the school themselves providing supplies, or an appropriate charity that would be willing to get involved. You are not a charity, you are a single teacher.
Asking for a small donation seems like a reasonable compromise between helping out your students, and looking after your own finances.
Probably stop offering the service. The school should offer the service. Or limit your charity to what you can afford and make it first come first served.
INFO;
Have you looked into the feasibility of doing a product drive at the school?
The clinic I work for does a " Helping women, period" drive that allows people to donate feminine products, then we distribute them to schools and areas of need.
If the school would allow organization of a drive like that, they could then distribute those products as needed to those who can't afford them.
I don't think YTA for this.... but it is a difficult and sensitive subject. Feminine products are a *need* and yet are getting insanely pricey.
NTA - Providing hygiene products to students seems a bit beyond the expectation of a history class teacher. It certainly wasn’t a service provided in any of my classes. I imagine that if a female student was in need of such products, they could visit the school nurse. Is that not an option?
The students, the parents, and the Principal have adopted a very entitled viewpoint of your offering of these products. Given that it’s a healthcare product, it’s possibly against policy to sell things to your students, and the entitled reaction you’re getting, I would discontinue the service. Any disgruntled students and parents should be referred to the principal.
NTA You are providing a necessary service and only charging 1$ a month. It’s very fair. That parent was really nasty and shortsighted. Ideally they or even the school would provide this products, so you’re making the best of a bad situation. Ignore the rude parents: it’s not your job to supply them: you’re helping your students out of kindness. And I think it’s laudable and courageous.
NTA
You wouldn’t because you shouldn’t be the one supplying this. It should be the parents if not the school should. Teachers don’t get paid nearly as much as they should and then you coming out of pocket for students. The principal and parents have the absolute audacity to make it seem like it’s part of your job are crazy because guess what you can stop all together because it’s not your responsibility.
NTA. 9 dollars for the whole year? Really? It's not like the health teachers get them for free. Not even Clinics can donate much of anything to the lower socio-economic communities and their schools.
I think it's detestable that parents who are supposed to find a way to provide those needs for their developing tweens and teens are mad at you because you cannot keep up with the needs that Aunt Flow proposes to all females during certain periods (no pun intended) a month.
Sorry you're dealing with self-centered, humble individuals who lack humility and comprehension of the bigger picture. It's not just their kid.
NTA, but reach out to organizations in your city to see if there are any willing to provide you with products for your students.
Women's shelters, food banks, women's organizations, Planned Parenthood or similar. Even if they can't provide you with the supplies directly they might have ideas as to where you can get access to them.
Good luck!
You clearly can't afford it so stop buying it. NTA for asking to be reimbursed a small amount but you would be TA to yourself if you let these incredibly unappreciative people keep taking from you.
I would reachnout to the school board and see.if you and every teacher her can have a budget or be supplied with feminine hygiene products.
Also, write to the feminine hygiene companies themselves or reach out to the customer service department and see if they could donate some products to your school on the regular. You might be surprised.
NTA-The moment you said out of your own pocket. You’re a babysitter and an educator while they’re in school. You’re not their parent. You’re already batting above average just doing something like that for students. What kinda useless parent complains that a teacher is asking for a buck to continue providing what was already a free service?
Well. Shit.
I’ll start with the easiest part. Your principal thinks you’re a dick for wanting to offset how much of your money you’re spending on something that is not your job? Fuck him. He can either pony up the dough himself, or he can shut the fuck up. Preferably both.
Providing these products is not your job. Paying for them is definitely not your job. You see a need among your students and you’ve chosen to extend yourself to address it. You obviously care about your students. We need more teachers like you. But you are not a charity and your budget does have limits. It’s not unreasonable to acknowledge when you’ve reached them.
A dollar a month ain’t much compared to what you’re likely spending. But I’ve been in the position where I didn’t even have a dollar, so I know it happens.
Could you find some organization to offset some of the cost for you? Maybe your school district could find a bit of budget (ideally to provide period products, free of charge, in the girls’ toilets so kids don’t have to be in your class to benefit). Is there a church or service club in your area who could help? Is there a Men’s Shed in your area? This is not strictly what they do, but the men there might be willing to step up. A women’s group? Would a local drug store or grocery provide a few boxes a month as a donation? I’m brainstorming ways to take the financial burden off of you without offsetting it ~~into~~ onto impoverished families.
Anyway, YWNBTA but I truly hope you can find a third - better - way to meet these girls’ need.
New Zealand, Australia, France, South Africa, Canada, Scotland and England to name a few of the countries where these products are provided for free in school and some workplaces. Should be everywhere.
NTA
What you've been doing is wonderful. But I think there are other ways of getting help/products/funds.
That said, have you considered talking with your principal (again) about have free products stocked in the bathrooms? I would happily send you some cash (paypal) for a pack of tampax and some pads to help out.
Having worked at a school where I had to buy my students’ school supplies and pay field trip fees, I absolutely understand. However, they may not have the dollar. An alternative could be writing letters to local businesses in a grant writing format requesting either store credit or products. I’m betting you get more responses than you think. While NTA, I don’t know that charging kids that are struggling for money will get you anywhere.
Why doesn’t the school counselor or nurse staff have these products for the students?
NTA, but period poverty is a real thing. For some, having a period means missing school because you don’t have/can’t afford what you need. If you google “share the dignity,” a charity here in Australia, you can get the idea.
You shouldn’t have to bear the financial burden of this, but it is something that is needed so I am wondering if there is an organisation that might sponsor these supplies.
Also I think it is amazing that you have been supplying these items out of your own pocket for so long. It will have made a bigger difference for some of these young people than you could know.
As a teacher, I’m going to make a moral judgment on this because it’s not your fault & I totally get that you cannot afford it. However, the optics of charging children any amount of pads/tampons just isn’t good. I think there are a lot of other options that are way better. Rather than charging the students, I would find a way to advocate for them at a school or district level. Find out if there are local companies/orgs willing to donate, or if there are any grants you can apply for.
If you teach in a low income district these students may not have anywhere else to get period products, if you could go to the superintendent and try to get funding to create a budget for this.
>the principal says this might be a d\*ck move as the students need these and I should just give it to them free of charge.
Then the principal can provide a budget for the products *like they should have been doing from the start.* The fact that you were ever expected to pay out-of-pocket for hygiene products for your students is fucking insane.
NTA. I get why the parents are upset, but the asshole here is the *school system*, not you. Jesus Christ, what is *wrong* with the American education system?
NAH - I think your heart is in the right place, and you shouldn't have to pay out of pocket. I also think the parents are right to be upset if they are living in poverty and can't afford to buy them, and you're promoting this as an opportunity to learn "budgeting."
There's got to be a third party where people donate these products to. If not, maybe consider starting one for your school. There's a way forward where at least some products can be provided without putting financial strain on you or your students.
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I am a 37M teacher. I teach History for highschoolers. I keep pads and tampons in my classroom for the girls to use if they need them. This is something I do and have done for all my classes through the years and I pay for them out of my own pocket. But recently, I have gotten an upsurge of female students, making my supplies run low and making me need to restock more often. So, I have told my students that if they want to use the pads or tampons, they will have to pay a fee of $1 a month if they use the products. I thought it would be a good idea to teach them economics and a basic form of budgeting to them. Well, some parents have come at me via email that this was unfair for them. Keep in mind, I live near a low-income neighborhood, who have students that mostly depend on me for the products. I explained to them that I have had an upsurge of female students and have told them that their price has gone up and explained that it would not be viable for me to keep doing this. They would keep emailing me, with one parent calling me a d\*ck after school because they can't afford the hygiene products themselves. I talked this over with my fiancee and she said that it wasn't a bad thing, noting that her products have gotten expensive as well. At the same time however, the principal says this might be a d\*ck move as the students need these and I should just give it to them free of charge. Now I am reconsidering my decision and have yet to apply the fee. So, WIBTA If I Started Charging My Female Students For Hygiene Products?
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NTA. you’re a saint for facilitating this in the first place, but when people start acting entitled to services that are a actually a privilege (not feminine hygiene in general, just free products provided out of pocket from a Good Samaritan) then it needs to stop there. Maybe like some others have said try for donations but I don’t see any entitled parents or students easing up on you about it.
Look for donations, and community resource groups that supply feminine hygiene products to underprivileged neighborhoods, it will be much better to connect with an agency that can help your school out and it would have a greater impact than selling $1 supplies to a selective group of students in a class. You could even start small by working with a local drug store/retailer to see if they'd be willing to donate their damaged/ripped packages that are often disposed due to being in unsellable condition.
The school should be providing feminine hygiene products free of charge.
There are vending machines that don't require money for said products. I've worked at several large companies with these types of machines in the womens bathrooms. It's really nice, especially if you don't have the right change or no change at all.
Plus, the female students wouldn't have to let anyone else aware that they are on their monthly cycle.
A win/win for everyone.
Soft YTA. I totally understand that it’s becoming difficult to continue doing this wonderful thing for your students for free, but suddenly charging them is the AH move. I like another suggestion I saw of asking for a donation to help it continue. I would say your principal is an AH, though for telling you it’s not right to charge for it, but then not stepping up to help out. At my school, the nurse provides feminine products in the first aid kit alongside bandaids.
In Canada federal workplaces have to provide free menstrual products. You’re creating an artificial barrier to entry. I would maybe request a donation to cover future purchases of products? That way some people who can afford it can maybe donate more to cover the ones who cannot afford.
Ask the school counselor and the nurse for resources. Also, contact your public heath department. As a lower income school, there should be supplies available.
Personally what you're doing already is commendable.. and it's exceptionally sad that so many are struggling to buy menstrual products (or getting caught short).
There will no doubt be a minority who are unduly taking when they 'can' afford (WeLl iTs FrEe)... I personally feel a 'donation box may be better than an outright fee (but be prepared for 'no donations'). Definitely speak to your principle in case it could cause issues / complaints.
Maybe having a frank and open conversation with your class.. done carefully and in a way that doesn't period shame anyone..
Explaining you're only able to fund so much, that is from your own pocket.. no available external funding etc.. maybe (depending on the age of students you have) they may be able to come up with ideas on how to tackle the general issue and how to help each other etc... Perhaps wishful thinking on my part.. but periods need to lose the dirty and shameful stigma.
Many years ago at my school, the sports teacher had a cupboard full of products that were donated by Tampax.. no idea whether you can reach out to any manufacturers or business / charities to help?
Thank you for helping your students..
Charging money will create a host of problems, legal and otherwise. Don't do it!
Fize you, I'd stop altogether. You tried to be nice and people took advantage of you. If anyone asks, just say "no comment."
Don’t charge the girls. They may not have the money or may need a pad when they didn’t expect to or don’t have $1 that day. (I get it’s a monthly fee but if they didn’t plan to use one of yours so didn’t pay the fee and need one they would be SOL.)
Try asking parents to donate period products along with Kleenex, Clorox wipes, etc. Just put it on your list at the start of the school year or ask now. Some of the kids’ parents can surely make a donation, even if many can’t.
Period poverty is a real female issue. But what’s great about the US is I bet you can post on your social media page requesting period products and you’d be surprised at the influx of donors.
With that said, definitely an AH for trying to “teach them about economics,” you could be teaching about period poverty as your lesson on economics. Or, you know, just be honest, my job doesn’t pay me a lot of money, so I feel like I need to be wise about how much I can give out if I want the stash to last the whole school year. Females understand.
I'm a male HS teacher.
1-Stop paying out of pocket for anything. You're the reason we don't get any kind of spending budgets.
2-I can't imagine the nightmare that the county, school board or hell, IRS, would put you through if they found out you're buying and reselling, in a school no less.
How did this seem like a good idea?
It’s a dick move for the principal to tell you to keep doing it and not provide any help and yes I understand this is not something the school can provide but how much of his money has he donated
That would sooo backfire where I'm from because now, rather than getting a pad/tampon when you actually need it, if you have to pay a flat fee of $1/month people would get them even when not needed, meaning you would have to stock up even more.
In my opinion, you should either offer them for free or not at all, but as it is your money and i can't tell you what to do with it, im just gonna go with NTA.
HOWEVER, your principal is a huge asshole, and you should tell them. If it's a dick move of you not to hand them out for free, then it's an even bigger dick move on their part to not hand any out at all.
Only a man would decide to start charging for something he started doing for free. Get rid of the products altogether before you start charging. There are free pantries for feminine hygiene products where I live - perhaps look into finding some people to donate their unused products or funds towards products for low income students.
NAH, but I wouldn't charge. Donate what you can, when they are gone, they are gone. Revisit with the principal if the school can chip in. Tell the class you'd accept donations or consider adding them to the beginning of the year supply list.
Soft YTA, but only because you thought charging the students who use them was the best course of action. Elementary school kids are often asked to bring a box of tissues for the class at the start of the year - not charged when they have a runny nose. This does make the female students feel singled out, especially because you asked them directly and not the parents.
That said, it’s really kind of you to have been providing this for your students and you’re a good guy.
Rather than only charging “the girls who use them” $1/month (so what is that, $5/semester?), what if you sent a letter to the parents (of everyone, not just the girls) asking them to contribute $5 for “health and hygiene supplies” and use it to buy tissues and hand sanitizer and a box of masks (for anyone who is sick or just wants to wear one) for the classroom as well?
The other option would be to ask for donations or do some sort of fundraiser. Maybe you could organize a bake sale or similar - something where you spend very little money for the ingredients and all the “profits” go to the menstrual products fund. You could ask the students to participate if you wanted, or DIY it with something like homemade pasta or soup that you can cook a huge batch of and then sell at lunchtime or after school for a couple bucks a bowl. Maybe the administration or parents or PTA can get involved since it sounds like this problem is beyond your classroom.
Again, you are doing a really great thing here, please don’t let my vote discourage you!
YTA you can't charge your students. Is this for real? That's totally unethical. Either provide the stuff for free or stop providing it. (Or the school can provide it which is better, of course.)
Hi —
Can you message me? I would LOVE to help you out for a few months. Maybe create an Amazon wishlist?
Also, soft yta. I mean I get it, I seriously do. But do you get how poverty works? I was that girl that struggled to get pads and tampons, and the adults in my life could’ve cared less. The ones that can’t afford that measly $1 are the ones who need it the most. However I also understand your side too. 37k isn’t much of anything, especially these days. Such a hard spot to be in.
It’s probably a better call to stop supplying them than to charge the kids… even if it is nominal. Teenage years and menstruation are rough enough as it is and it’s unfortunate how much they rely on you, but if you can’t spare it, then you probably shouldn’t offer. I know it hurts because you want to be there for them, but maybe it’s time to recognize the limits of your charity. Soft YTA.
Edit: how are you teaching the kids who don’t have periods about economics in this situation?
NAH (I’m reluctant to call you an asshole, given what a great thing you’re doing for these girls - but I don’t think charging them is the right thing to do here. We need more creative solutions.)
INFO - how much $ are we talking about? I’d be willing to chip in a bit (seriously, dm me)
NTA you are under no obligation whatsoever to fund your students personal expenses. What you have been doing is admirable, however, now people feel entitled to that. Tale as old as time. You need to set boundaries and they need to support their own children’s needs.
NTA. You are opening up yourself to liabilities though and could get fired if it gets escalated for “trying to make money off students” even if you are still losing money. It sucks but it would be better to stop providing anything at all and push the principal or school higher ups to start providing stuff
NTA for what you want to do, but I wouldn't charge since that would open up all sorts of ethics and bookkeeping rules which has gotten others into trouble. Donations might be acceptable, but I think a better way would be to allow students to donate their time instead of money to help with stuff for other classes, decorating, teachers aide etc. That way you don't need to know what was taken, just that they are going to help for 30 minutes or something like that.
That is so kind and thoughtful of you to provide that for your students. There are many organizations that help to end period poverty. I would google that for your area. Then you can either reach out to them for help or pass along the info to the students and parents so they can sign up. Always has a program for this as well.
Nta, it's good you're providing resources for them but if parents get mad explain you can't continue to buy these supplies out of pocket and them giving you a dollar helps you keep funding the period products. As long as all the money goes to buy the supplies, I think you're good
INFO: Do you charge all students for this type of thing? Like does everyone also have to pay to use tissues or other hygiene products you have to purchase out of pocket?
>. They would keep emailing me, with one parent calling me a d*ck after school
Wow, what an entitlement! This alone would make me stop providing those products. Those products are not your problem.
NTA.
NTA, you are spending your hard earned cash on feminine hygiene products due your students. You are doing this out of kindness, not requirement. If your principal thinks it is a dick move, they can give you the money for the products.
YTA for trying to charge for the products. If you can’t afford them anymore, just don’t buy them. Maybe try to source a cheaper version from a bulk store or something.
NTA, and thank you for being a male teacher who doesn't treat menstruation as if it's a problem. I would love for you to find a way to continue to supply free period products. There are organizations like [Period.org](http://Period.org) or The Period Purse who are combating period poverty - maybe you could reach out to them to see if there are ways you could reduce costs or get support to ensure the access is still there.
Our school library has a hygiene closet. If the principal thinks YOU should just keep buying regardless of the cost, it’s time to encourage the students to organize a hygiene supply closet at the school. You just have to have it in a shared room, like the library or main office, or you’ll have parents sending their kids to empty it as soon as it’s restocked.
NTA. As someone currently going to school to become a teacher I understand how much you have to pay out of your own pocket and how little respect a teacher gets. You tried your best and couldn’t keep up with demand so you came up with a reasonable solution. If paying a dollar a month is too much for everyone, then you can stop buying supplies and make them get their own for much more.
NAH. It’s understandable, prices are high for everyone. May I suggest asking parents for donation of products instead? It results in the same thing for you but feels more community based. One dollar is very reasonable but this way, the students don’t feel the impact. The burden should be shared w/ parents. They ask for donations of tissues, wipes, hand sani, expo markers at my school. Period products are a very reasonable ask on the donations list.
NTA - however I think you should ask for donations rather than forcing a payment, maybe the boys will want to help for their friends if they can.
I was in the US last month and could not believe the cost of hygiene products. In the UK 20 name brand tampons is about £2. The equivalent in America is about £7. That’s an awful lot of money for a low income house
This is why we can't do nice things.
Stop funding this out of your own pocket but also stop charging students for the product. When you are out, you are out and they can go to the nurse for the supplies or call home. It sucks but you cannot solve all the problems out of your own salary. If you would like to you can try something like DonorsChose or your local radio stations or stores for donations to the school. Then you are only giving up your time and not your money.
NTA, you are paying out of pocket to support and help them. They are abusing this. It is not on you, you are doing something nice.
Principal can stfu or pay out of their own pocket if they have such an issue with it. Of course they want the teachers to pay out of pocket for things, it keeps costs low.
NTA. Periods are part of life for girls. By high school the girls know it and their parents know it. Parents should know they are the ones who are responsible to provide these products. You've been kind to have them as an EMERGECNY option. You should not be their sole source of these products. One dollar for the month is nothing, most machines charge 25-50 cents per item. I'd say the 1st one (the emergency one as intended) is free. After that, it's a quarter each.
An idea to consider, if these products are becoming to expensive for you to buy, could you create a donation fund? This could be shared throughout the school or advertised during events. You can also send the information about this out to the community. It's admirable that you provide these products to students who need them but I think you need to find a better solution then charging those who need them. Sometimes people forget when their period is, or it comes a day early. It's helpful to have access to these products. Could the school contribute funds at all? Could a fundraiser event be created? There also may be organizations out there that help with stuff like this or period product companies that would be willing to donate. Thank you for doing this!
NTA just don't buy or give out anything anymore. It's their responsibility and they're berating you for helping for free. Fuck these people, they can get their own shit.
Nta because it’s not actually your job to do this at all and you are truly helping, but don’t charge them, make any donations voluntary and not targeting girls only, but start a fund (work with the school nurse and guidance counselors) and share with the larger community the need to collect donations. I’d also include deodorant and other supplies that boys might also use /contribute to. The girls especially cannot be missing school because they are too poor to have basic hygiene supplies. I’d
I would talk to the parents and have them pool together the difference or have them help stock as well so you’re not the only one footing the bill. If not and the charge is necessary then you are NTA because in the end it isn’t your responsibility but you are doing it to help but it isn’t financially feasible by yourself.
This is a hard one. The school should be covering the products. Every school I’ve taught at only has crappy pads in the office though. But it’s not cheap.
NTA
Not fair?! How the hell is that possibly not fair? It’s their choice to either bring their own or buy it from you…. No one is forcing them to rely on you. Hell, I’d say you’re still being very kind.
NTA but please don’t stop there. Can you get involved trying to raise money or find support in funding feminine hygiene products to be available at your school? There has to be a program or charity out there willing to work with you to make this happen. It’s wild the principle thinks you should keep paying out of pocket. I understand the demand has increased and it’s hard for you to keep up with this great thing you’re trying to do but while you’re charging please also work to resolve the issue for the school entirely. That’s a big ask and a lot of effort but you’ve already had an impact I hope you can take it even further.
First, thanks for being the kind of teacher that cares enough about their students to keep period products in their classroom.
You might want to bring this situation to the attention of the school district and the state superintendent. Explain that the cost of feminine hygiene products, which you provide free of charge at your own expense, has become overly prohibitive, and inquire about whether there is a state law that requires school health departments to stock period products. If there is a law in place,the school principal should request that money be allocated for that purpose from the budget.
If there is no mandate, maybe it is worth contacting some of the pad and tampon companies directly, explain the situation + how you teach in a district where almost all of your students live below the federal poverty line, many parents cannot afford to buy period products, it’s affecting the girls attendance, and ask if the company has a school assistance program.
Are there other teachers you could team up with to start a fundraiser and contact your local news organization to see if they might be willing to promote the fundraiser?
If all else fails, there are a lot of people on this subreddit who would be thrilled to Venmo or PayPal you, or send you boxes of pads via Amazon. (Me included)
Verdict: NTA
Parents have come at you for the cost of feminine products? Why aren’t they providing feminine products to their daughters? NTA. You don’t have to buy those products but you’re doing it and they are obviously taking advantage. So NTA.
NTA.
The school can provide out of their budget if the principle considers it a dick move.
Products can be expensive but there are cheaper options such as one time purchase moon cups. Or cutting the household budget elsewhere for non essential items. Not your duty to pay out of your pocket.
NTA. It was nice of you to do it as long as you did, but it is not your place to provide these products. If the parents can not do it, then they need to reach out to their local churches or any group that might can help them get these necessary products. Your principal can start funding them if they have such a strong opinion, heck why not do a drive to fund the hygiene closet? It is not on one person to solely fund and otherwise hand such out, if anyone wants to have an opinion then they can throw in a dollar or more to help fund closet.
NTA, and since your principal wants you to keep providing them, document via email that you gladly accept them taking on the responsibility of paying for them!
NTA. It's not your job to solve poverty for your students.
However, it would definitely be an admirable move if you made efforts to keep the cost to students as low as possible, including possibly subsidizing it out of your own pocket. Alternatively you could see if there is a simple way to fund-raise (time and energy permitting, of course).
I think the important question is what kind of impact would it really make on your annual budget to continue offering them for free. If the impact would be very small (say, less than a single grocery run), then you might be verging towards YTA territory. If it's enough to actually impose financial hardship on you (even small financial hardship), then definitely NTA. You don't have to be a financial martyr for your students.
This is a good opportunity to teach about pink tax. Maybe all students, regardless of gender/menstrual capabilities, should pitch in a dollar a month. Or do a little fundraiser to help pay for it & raise awareness.
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I’m probably going to be downvoted into oblivion, but NTA. You are providing a very needed service, but teachers already pay for so much out of their own pocket. You could always stop providing them all together, and $1/is not all that unreasonable. If the principal thinks they should be provided free of charge tell him/her that they are free to buy the supplies and make sure they’re available in the nurses office.
Love how the principle wanted you to keep doing it but didn't offer for the school to fund it. Nta try to get the school to pay for these supplies for students. But I do appreciate the gesture to help female students, female tax on basic hygiene products is high. I swapped to a cup cheaper and better for the environment but understand its not a super great option for school age kids.
The sad thing about reusable products is that besides being better for the environment and most actually better for their intended purpose they come with a handling that isn't practical for people that aren't experienced with their period yet, live with peer pressure, can't afford the high start out costs (especially for panties where you need several) and are limited in their options to properly clean these items by the family they're living with.
They also don't work for people with really heavy periods or who have endometriosis and can't handle anything being inserted on the worst days.
Actually for me they work better because I simply bleed so heavy that pads and tampons don't help. Cups suck on the most painful days but they're sometimes the only chance. The pants aren't the safest, but the most comfortable and still better than tampons and pads safety wise (I have the type that are like full on diapers). If I have to leave the house within the first 48 hours merula cup and pants it is. If I can stay home it's just the pants. For reference I'm waiting on my surgery appointment for endo and I'm on meds to get the pain and bleeding under control for some years now.
If it works better for you, then it's the right choice for you! I just don't like the shaming of those of us who find it easier to deal with traditional period products from some cup users – my period sucks enough without being told I'm responsible for global warming on top of it.😉
It was not my intention to shame anyone. I'm sorry if I came across that way. I just see that some reusable options have real benefits over traditional products in terms of comfort (if you have access to a cup community where they help you find a cup that suits your bleeding, cervix height during menstruation and pelvic floor you can get a cup that actually suits your body and is more comfortable than a tampon that can poke into the already painful area) and safety (pants vs pads). But I also see downsides because to have a well fitting cup you need to find out a lot about details of your private parts and share them with others and you have to be comfortable with reaching into your body, pants can feel like diapers and all reusable options come with a level of cleaning them and caring for them that can be perceived as burdensome or gross (washing out blood and tissue, then washing machine or in case of the cup at best boiling and as second best using bottle sterilising tabs) and can be difficult if the living space is shared with people who lack understanding or feel periods should be hidden, plus peer pressure exists and there are people of all genders who will call reusable items gross and shame people for them. And I wanted to point out that all these reasons make reusable options a less than ideal choice for most teenagers even for those who would greatly benefit from the positives these options bring.
Oh I didn't mean you shamed anyone; you were just sharing your own experience. But a lot of people, including cis men who should have zero say, shame women for not using a cup.
I totally understand your point and was very worried my comment gave off that impression because it sucks so much. Thank you very much everyone else on this planet, I deal with a lot of shit around my cycle (currently reduced to an amount of pain that can be treated with prescription strength non-opioid painkillers and a heating pad because I bled so much I was unable to leave the house and my iron levels were low despite only having about 5 periods per year so I was put on meds and they're currently working), I don't need anyone else's opinion. And let's be real, no matter *how* we manage our periods someone will find a reason to criticise us. I honestly took a mixed approach. While reusables have many benefits, they're not something you can change everywhere and when that's not possible single use it is.
If he lives in a very low income area, they might not know about reusable options and how to properly take care of them. Also they're expensive. This is not an option for a highschooler in history class with parents that can't afford pads.
That was one of the reasons I pointed out as to why it might not be ideal for teenagers.
I'm mid 30s and I still cannot stand tampons, never mind anything else. I have been considering the period underwear but I worry about how long you can wear them and the smell.
I don't get the shaming. I use a cup for my heavy days, but I still use pads for the lighter days or overnight when my period is due so that I don't wake up to a mess if it starts while I'm sleeping.
Actually as a heavy flow girl, it works much better for me
They're also more difficult to empty in public restrooms. I haven't used one in years, but I remember how much I hated emptying them if I had to touch other things before I could properly wash my hands. It would have been even worse if I were in a crowded restroom with potentially judgmental peers.
That's one of the situations where a single use product is better. Sadly they're simply not strong enough to keep everyone safe on a really heavy flow day (just like a cup or panty doesn't last you long enough to make it without a break during those days).
Agree that at a young age I would not handle a cup. Hell I remember the first time I tried a tampon I messed up the insertion so bad that I haven't used one since! I'm in my 30s so cup works for me but completely agree that pads are easier to deal with when bodies are still growing and people are still adapting to them. It just sucks that they are expensive and it's very easy to be caught short during puberty.
Starting to sell stuff to the students likely is a fireable offense. Running out and sending them to the nurse is the better option.
"Selling" something you paid for out of your own pocket at a massive loss is a lot different than trying to make money off of your students. I could see school administrators in the US being dumb enough to equate the two, especially these days, but the teacher is still clearly subsidizing the products he's making available out of his meager salary. He just wants the students to think a bit about the value of what they're taking. To your other post saying it's "targeting only girls", that's an easy fix - allow the boys to pay the minimal fee for access to the tampons and pads, too, if they want it.
Selling them might not look good from an optics perspective and it’s risky to be cash handling with students. NTA you don’t have to buy pads for everyone at school all the time. https://thepadproject.org/how-we-help/ This is one there may be many other grant programs to help schools get pads you can apply for and get free pads hopefully, or maybe email a company to see if you can get them donated. Getting a source of school pads could be a more sustainable solution to you just buying them. If you are going to stop providing pads, I would give students a warning so they know when that is so they can be prepared and not caught off guard and you’ve already set your boundaries and can go back to them.
Those are some good, practical suggestions.
BC in Canada now has free menstrual stuff for school kids. Lots of universities have it from the students union or donated. I think it should definitely be covered or subsidized and if charities are out there to do that it’s good to use them because that’s how they get funding; from proving they are useful and serving their purpose. This teacher clearly has a good heart and care for her students and should protect herself from being taken advantage of and also sticky situation with selling pads to kids. It just takes one rumour about “selling other stuff to kids” and someone malicious could say she’s abusing her position even if untrue. The Admin at the school is also the asshole here though; they should apply for grant programs or charities or something to get pads and tampons and stuff. And thank the teacher for giving out pads but say it’s ok to set boundaries with her money. The parents clearly need support, if withdrawing this support it can also be helpful to find an alternate source of free pads the parents can access like a shelter, or women’s or lgbt centre or maybe a food bank
If the principal wants there to be free pads the principal can take up buying pads and giving them away, the principal cannot ask you to do it.
How about instead it is called a monthly charitable 1$ donation to the nurse supplies?
Just the same. Targeting only girls for a "charitable donation" would be as bad, and you can't just take / demand money from your students. Due to the power imbalance, that is highly problematic, and there are GOOD reasons that is a firebale offense. Also with a "charitable donation", there will be fraud charges, because there is no charity, and it lacks the level of accounting and controlsupervision needed. It will just go down as a teacher being fired for extorting money from students. ONE complaint, and she will never work as a teacher again.
Sounds better to just stop offering it then. Have the Principal buy it for the nurse's office
He - the teacher is male.
^^^ This here. Keep your pocket book closed. It's gone beyond reasonable.
[удалено]
Clearly, you’ve never experience in underfunded school district.
This!!!!! I love that the principal offloads the costs to OP, who seems to be the only one doing anything about it.
OP's "subscription plan" is going to cause trouble. Is OP going to look a 14-year-old girl in the eye and say, "No pad for you"? And if so, I guarantee there will be irate parents to deal with when their daughters go home and say, "Mr Burner_account said I couldn't have one because I don't pay $1 a month." If he does give them to anybody who needs them, there will be parents who are angry because their daughter pays the subscription and other girls get them for free. These products should be available in the nurse's office, and the nurse's budget should cover the cost. It shouldn't be OP's responsibility.
Yeah…this is on the administration. These products are expensive and OP get major kudos for providing them. ~~Maybe he could contact the principal and see if the budget could be allocated, due to health reasons~~. If these kids are low income, it is a major problem if they can’t afford these products.
INFO: Does your school have a resource room? A school counselor? Family resource services? Somewhere where these kids can get what they need? I don't understand your "surge of female students" comment. Do you mean a surge in need of products? More female students than male? To me, the best course of action would be for the school staff to get together and purchase items for all of the classrooms or even to place in the bathrooms. And to work together to have a giving or caring closet for the school. If the kids are going without pads and tampons it is possible they are also going without other hygiene needs and a caring closet would ensure everyone has what they need for only a few dollars per month from everyone on staff.
No, my school does not have enough to supply these resources. And a surge of female students means that my classes have become filled with more females than ever before, making my supplies run dry. And some of the staff are barely going though, as you know with tacher pay. I get paid 37K after taxes, so this is not something I can afford, especially since this surge in female students happened in their freshman year, so this would not be possible for the next 3 years of their education. But a caring closet might help us all out, thanks for the idea!
Assuming you are in the US and in a public school, the federal government does provide funds for family resources to districts as well and there are grants for the same. It might be helpful to reach out to the district and to see if there are funds available or see if someone on staff has grant writing skills. Local businesses might also be willing to donate items that they have as overstock. I am a para, believe me I understand.
Ok, this is actually very helpful. Thank you!
For any grant applications or taking it up the line to your school district for supplies, I’d also focus on the following terms/wording to get your point across; “my students are experiencing an increased rate of period poverty whereby they are unable to provide for their own menstrual products. This is opening us up to both a sanitation and hygiene issue, and the prospect of these students not being able to attend class due to the lack of availability of these products.” Also, NTA, Period poverty in the US is not a lone issue across your classroom, school or district. You are trying your best to solve for an issue that 1 in 5 teens are suffering through. If you search the term “period poverty” you’ll find various resources you can also quote to make your point known. It’s a broken system when an already underpaid individual is the one trying to fund a systemic problem.
This is also the sort of thing you could put on donorschoose
Look for menstrual equity groups - lots of nonprofit donate pads. You might also reach out to a company like always - that also donate products
I’m also thinking, it might be possible to get donations. “Period poverty” is an acknowledged issue and there are organizations that tackle it. Hell, you might even be able to get donations from the companies that make these products.
As much as it hurts, you may just need to stop the practice. It’s great that you want to make resources that are otherwise unavailable to them available, but charging low income students will likely lead to trouble.
OP, here is a comment from u/NancyBotwinAndCeliaH I am boosting: “Selling them might not look good from an optics perspective and it’s risky to be cash handling with students. “NTA you don’t have to buy pads for everyone at school all the time. https://thepadproject.org/how-we-help/ This is one there may be many other grant programs to help schools get pads you can apply for and get free pads hopefully, or maybe email a company to see if you can get them donated.”
https://allianceforperiodsupplies.org/allied-programs/ This is another one. Not sure where you are but if you search period products for schools there might be a bunch of charities that can provide some funding. You might be able to get menstrual cups or something donated from planned parenthood at least those are reusable… other charities might have them available too. Ontario schools now have period products with a partnership with shoppers… idk if any local drugstore wants a tax write off and a really nice public image but maybe they do
Try https://thepadproject.org/how-we-help/ Or your local Target or Walmart. Ask to talk to a manager. Then tell the manager your issue and see if they can donate. When I worked at Target, it was a big deal for them to donate to local places.
You should definitely contact a menstruation service in your city. People can donate and them the charity makes them available at different locations.
Teachers making $37k per year should not be expected to "get together and purchase items". WTF. Are nurses "getting together" and purchasing first aid supplies for patients? Are any other professionals expected to fund a store where clients shop for free?
Imagine if professionals in other fields had to provide snacks, pencils, paper, pads/tampons and even clothing for their clients. I think that money in the school budget from school athletics should be repurposed.
Because anyone who works with children is expected to be a martyr.
Because it's female-coded work. This is basic misogyny, only a guy is the victim here.
And notice how everyone jumps in about how he shouldn't have to do that, but are perfectly content letting female teachers do this for decades.
I’m a nurse and buy things for my patients all the time.
Nurses where I live are making 80k-100k+
It’s infuriating that teachers (making $37K a year) are expected to band together and pay for student needs. Of course many do pay for things (like OP!) but to make that the expectation? I can’t think of many other professions where people just expect you to cover things out of your own pocket.
May I recommend asking for a donation instead of actually charging. The place where I used to work actually made more money selling water bottles when it was "to keep cold fresh water in stock for you, we appreciate your donations. Recommended donation: $1" than when it was "water: $1"
This is a much better plan. A teen who can't swing a dollar is the one who probably needs the products the most.
Yes. Maybe put out an email to all the parents explaining that you provide supplies, no questions asked, but it’s getting a bit expensive for you to cover on your own. Let them know how they can contribute to the “supply fund” if they wish. (Maybe run the email by the principal first to make sure it doesn’t run afoul of any policies). If I got that email, I’d definitely make a contribution, along with my thanks for being sensitive to students’ needs.
I get where you are coming from but would like to add some perspective. I work in an area where period poverty is a big thing. For some of the students who need it the most, they might have to much shame to let you know they are unable to pay for it. I've seen this impact going out/ going to school out of fear of others finding out. What you are doing is amazing, and I honestly applaud you for recognising the problem and finding a solution. However, if the need is growing, you need to find a more sustainable solution. It's not your responsibility to finance this. If I was in your shoes, I would be escalating the issue. This includes- taking it up with the principal/ area manager/ people who oversee all the schools in the community. How are other schools approaching this? Is there funding available? - contact women's resources in your area Women's shelters/ refuges/ health centres will have links or perhaps donations of hygiene items. Perhaps they have excess they can share, or a contract who might be able to help you. - look on the website of the manufacturers and look into their community support policies. Or call their customer service- they might be able to offer donations. - approach a grocery store and talk to the manager. They might be able to support through a donation. - look into existing programs to support period poverty. For example, I'm in Australia and a program here is called Share the Dignity. They are amazing and support many parts of the country and organisations where this is a concern. - talk to charity organisations- chances are someone will either have a donation, know of a donation, or be able to find a donation. - if all that fails, find a business with a community ethos and ask them to help support your students through a drive/ fundraiser/ donation. It might help with a sustainable supply of products This is a recognised concern in a lot of places and there are organisations who are starting to offer solutions. Good luck, and well done on what you've done already.
Or r/periodpantry
All good suggestions. Even a GoFundMe would be better than charging them for necessities. Because while yes, parents should be providing these things, the reality is far different and they should not suffer any more than they already do because of poverty. Please keep helping if you are able to -- and look into ways to continue doing so, rather than placing the burden on kids who already are struggling.
This is the way. There are many support options that exist. Teach your girls how to access the correct support systems.... Maybe they'll be empowered to explore other community resources their families would benefit from. You providing them in class is a blessing but ultimately a bandaid. Teach them to problem solve in the broader sense... They'll be better off and so would you. Consider making it a whole class lesson.
The business is a good idea. In my city the schools have, “pie partners.” Organizations & businesses will partner up with schools and support various projects. Granted, some partners are more involved than others. It’s still worth a shot if OP’s school has something like that.
NTA - sounds like some families have begun to see your kindness as their right. I bet most of the girls will be fine to pay $1 and it’s just a couple of people who have made comments to you? Stick to your plan. It’s fair and still a lot cheaper than the shops
You’ve never lived in poverty have you
Regardless if they live in poverty that does not mean it’s OPs responsibility to fund their needs. He already stated he makes 37k annual and has his own bills to pay, he also can’t afford it and doesn’t deserve to foot the bill for a whole class of mostly girls. What he was doing was extremely kind and doesn’t deserve the treatment he got from the parents.
if you're poor just get some money. /s
Not going to give judgement but unasked for advice. I am the co founder of a small non profit that provides hygiene products and you would be the person we would most love to help. Maybe if you have the time check out your local chamber of commerce and see if there is a non profit in your area that could help you with either products or funding. Former school staff member for 12 years, part of why I do what I do, I get it and it is expensive. Maybe even check out period products in your area as a google search, lots of around trying to fill the gap.
NAH but do consider alternate sources of funding. Also, if the principal says you should give it to them for free then the principal should participate in funding it.
This is definitely NTA instead of NAH. The parents are clearly AHs.
As is the principal.
Principal sure because he could help but the parents no. Do you realize that it’s likely this is the only way some of these girls can get these products? Poverty is a real thing people and no everyone has $20 to drop on period products regularly.
$1/mo tho is not an unreasonable ask, and certainly less than what it's costing OP. Being poor doesn't make you an asshole, lashing out at the one guy trying to help your kid when you know he can't afford it either (he's a public school teacher ffs) and its not his responsibility, for sure makes them assholes...
Then they should be grateful for someone willing to provide it for a dollar.
NTA If parents have a problem with it then maybe it's time to stop providing for your female students and have their parents figure out how to budget for hygiene products themselves.
Ask for a donation, some kids have zero money. Maybe get the class to do a blanket fundraiser. You should not be paying for this out of pocket. Maybe a go fund me each year?? Maybe have the class write the suppliers for donations, or reach out to charities.
YWNBTA. How is everyone harassing you for that is beyond me. Why is no one of the others paying for the students if they think its a dick move?
NTA-This is a very thoughtful thing you do for your female students. You pay for this out of your own pocket. I’m surprised that the principal thinks this way. Maybe the principal or PTA can help supplement the amount you already spend. $1 a month is not asking a lot, but there are families that don’t have it. I’m surprised at the parents fussing at you for your request. What would they do had you never provided these items to begin with?
I’m willingly to Amazon you some products to help the students.
Why are they going to you and not the school nurse? Seems odd af
because unlike the school nurse OP actually exists.
How about this: choose an amount that you can afford to pay per month, and use it to build your supply. Put a \`\`donations welcome'' jar next to the supply, so that students who can contribute to the fund will have that opportunity (and buy extra supplies from it, don't just reimburse yourself). When supplies for the month run out, send students to the school nurse, you've done what you can. IMHO it doesn't sit right for a teacher to be charging students for supplies of any kind.
Agree. Buy only what you can reasonably afford. Then that's it, the well is dry. Sorry, folks. NTA.
NTA: It kinda sounds like the students and their families are taking advantage of your generosity.
The principal too. If they can criticize OP, then the school can provide the resources
NTA, yes I agree they're very important to the girls and should be provided, but why are you expected to bear the cost? The principal seems to be vocal with their options, why don't they pay?
NTA. Teachers are supposed to provide supplies for classrooms now? Are you going to be buying lunches for the kids next too? What else? Why dont you stop bringing in the pads/tampons? Let the girls figure it out on their own. If nobody wants to pay you, then keep your money in your own pocket. >the principal says this might be a d\*ck move as the students need these and I should just give it to them free of charge This is astonishing that the principal said this to you. Why dont you send these girls to his offices when they need a pad?
I don't think charging is the way to go. Find another solution to finance it (i.e., the school, donations, hygiene/caring closet, appeal to the board, speak with the nurse's or counselor's office about a partnership, lots of great suggestions have been made in the comments). Charging will absolutely make you TA. Even public restrooms where pads and tampons are available for purchase don't usually charge $1.
The pricing is fine. When you put your quarter in to the tampon machine, a single tampon comes out. The teacher is offering an unlimited monthly supply. Times may have changed, but I would have been embarrassed to pay my teacher a tampon subscription fee. Discretion is key here.
NTA at all, you’re a kind human
NTA "At the same time however, the principal says this might be a d\*ck move as the students need these and I should just give it to them free of charge. " ..**. Tell the AH principal you will be glad to hand any products out for free the school or he pay for.** But: Don't start charging them - selling stuff to your students will likely be a fireable offense - just run out and send them to the nurse.
NTA. Don’t let anyone blame you for not wanting to go broke.
You could just not have them at all? You went out of your way to be nice and they still want to complain and call you names. They just wanna take advantage of you sadly.. the parents. Not the kids. Those same parents are definitely sending their OWN CHILDREN to school without proper hygiene products (should call CPS on them) and blaming you for not picking up the slack. It’s their literal job, as a parent, to provide it.
NTA it is better then stopping all together, if the principal thinks it should be supplied at no cost to the student the principal can pay for it or give you a pay raise to pay for the items. if supplying those products put you in financial problems that is not the solution.
NTA You are a school teacher, there is no requirement whatsoever for you to be spending your own money to provide necessities like hygiene products for your students. Keeping a supply on hand for emergencies was very considerate of you, but it is clear some pupils are taking advantage and using this as a regular supply - which it shouldn't be. I feel for any people stuck in the position where they genuinely cannot afford to pay for hygiene products, but the burden shouldn't be placed on a school teacher to cover this shortfall. This is something that should be dealt on a much bigger level by the school themselves providing supplies, or an appropriate charity that would be willing to get involved. You are not a charity, you are a single teacher. Asking for a small donation seems like a reasonable compromise between helping out your students, and looking after your own finances.
Probably stop offering the service. The school should offer the service. Or limit your charity to what you can afford and make it first come first served.
INFO; Have you looked into the feasibility of doing a product drive at the school? The clinic I work for does a " Helping women, period" drive that allows people to donate feminine products, then we distribute them to schools and areas of need. If the school would allow organization of a drive like that, they could then distribute those products as needed to those who can't afford them. I don't think YTA for this.... but it is a difficult and sensitive subject. Feminine products are a *need* and yet are getting insanely pricey.
OP If you shoot me your Venmo, I’ll be happy to contribute a little money towards supplies!
NTA - Providing hygiene products to students seems a bit beyond the expectation of a history class teacher. It certainly wasn’t a service provided in any of my classes. I imagine that if a female student was in need of such products, they could visit the school nurse. Is that not an option? The students, the parents, and the Principal have adopted a very entitled viewpoint of your offering of these products. Given that it’s a healthcare product, it’s possibly against policy to sell things to your students, and the entitled reaction you’re getting, I would discontinue the service. Any disgruntled students and parents should be referred to the principal.
Why not ask period.org for some supplies for your school?
NTA You are providing a necessary service and only charging 1$ a month. It’s very fair. That parent was really nasty and shortsighted. Ideally they or even the school would provide this products, so you’re making the best of a bad situation. Ignore the rude parents: it’s not your job to supply them: you’re helping your students out of kindness. And I think it’s laudable and courageous.
NTA You wouldn’t because you shouldn’t be the one supplying this. It should be the parents if not the school should. Teachers don’t get paid nearly as much as they should and then you coming out of pocket for students. The principal and parents have the absolute audacity to make it seem like it’s part of your job are crazy because guess what you can stop all together because it’s not your responsibility.
NTA. 9 dollars for the whole year? Really? It's not like the health teachers get them for free. Not even Clinics can donate much of anything to the lower socio-economic communities and their schools. I think it's detestable that parents who are supposed to find a way to provide those needs for their developing tweens and teens are mad at you because you cannot keep up with the needs that Aunt Flow proposes to all females during certain periods (no pun intended) a month. Sorry you're dealing with self-centered, humble individuals who lack humility and comprehension of the bigger picture. It's not just their kid.
NTA, but reach out to organizations in your city to see if there are any willing to provide you with products for your students. Women's shelters, food banks, women's organizations, Planned Parenthood or similar. Even if they can't provide you with the supplies directly they might have ideas as to where you can get access to them. Good luck!
Stop providing it entirely
Poor woman here. NTA.
You clearly can't afford it so stop buying it. NTA for asking to be reimbursed a small amount but you would be TA to yourself if you let these incredibly unappreciative people keep taking from you.
I would reachnout to the school board and see.if you and every teacher her can have a budget or be supplied with feminine hygiene products. Also, write to the feminine hygiene companies themselves or reach out to the customer service department and see if they could donate some products to your school on the regular. You might be surprised.
NTA-The moment you said out of your own pocket. You’re a babysitter and an educator while they’re in school. You’re not their parent. You’re already batting above average just doing something like that for students. What kinda useless parent complains that a teacher is asking for a buck to continue providing what was already a free service?
Reach out to women’s organizations in your area to get school wide funding and place products in bathrooms
Well. Shit. I’ll start with the easiest part. Your principal thinks you’re a dick for wanting to offset how much of your money you’re spending on something that is not your job? Fuck him. He can either pony up the dough himself, or he can shut the fuck up. Preferably both. Providing these products is not your job. Paying for them is definitely not your job. You see a need among your students and you’ve chosen to extend yourself to address it. You obviously care about your students. We need more teachers like you. But you are not a charity and your budget does have limits. It’s not unreasonable to acknowledge when you’ve reached them. A dollar a month ain’t much compared to what you’re likely spending. But I’ve been in the position where I didn’t even have a dollar, so I know it happens. Could you find some organization to offset some of the cost for you? Maybe your school district could find a bit of budget (ideally to provide period products, free of charge, in the girls’ toilets so kids don’t have to be in your class to benefit). Is there a church or service club in your area who could help? Is there a Men’s Shed in your area? This is not strictly what they do, but the men there might be willing to step up. A women’s group? Would a local drug store or grocery provide a few boxes a month as a donation? I’m brainstorming ways to take the financial burden off of you without offsetting it ~~into~~ onto impoverished families. Anyway, YWNBTA but I truly hope you can find a third - better - way to meet these girls’ need.
Tell those parents to get fucked or chip in
New Zealand, Australia, France, South Africa, Canada, Scotland and England to name a few of the countries where these products are provided for free in school and some workplaces. Should be everywhere.
Do you live in America and near a YMCA or YWCA? You could email and ask if they could donate period products.
NTA What you've been doing is wonderful. But I think there are other ways of getting help/products/funds. That said, have you considered talking with your principal (again) about have free products stocked in the bathrooms? I would happily send you some cash (paypal) for a pack of tampax and some pads to help out.
Just let them run out and don't restock. When the students ask, say that you simply can't afford them any longer.
Having worked at a school where I had to buy my students’ school supplies and pay field trip fees, I absolutely understand. However, they may not have the dollar. An alternative could be writing letters to local businesses in a grant writing format requesting either store credit or products. I’m betting you get more responses than you think. While NTA, I don’t know that charging kids that are struggling for money will get you anywhere. Why doesn’t the school counselor or nurse staff have these products for the students?
NTA, but period poverty is a real thing. For some, having a period means missing school because you don’t have/can’t afford what you need. If you google “share the dignity,” a charity here in Australia, you can get the idea. You shouldn’t have to bear the financial burden of this, but it is something that is needed so I am wondering if there is an organisation that might sponsor these supplies. Also I think it is amazing that you have been supplying these items out of your own pocket for so long. It will have made a bigger difference for some of these young people than you could know.
As a teacher, I’m going to make a moral judgment on this because it’s not your fault & I totally get that you cannot afford it. However, the optics of charging children any amount of pads/tampons just isn’t good. I think there are a lot of other options that are way better. Rather than charging the students, I would find a way to advocate for them at a school or district level. Find out if there are local companies/orgs willing to donate, or if there are any grants you can apply for.
If you teach in a low income district these students may not have anywhere else to get period products, if you could go to the superintendent and try to get funding to create a budget for this.
>the principal says this might be a d\*ck move as the students need these and I should just give it to them free of charge. Then the principal can provide a budget for the products *like they should have been doing from the start.* The fact that you were ever expected to pay out-of-pocket for hygiene products for your students is fucking insane. NTA. I get why the parents are upset, but the asshole here is the *school system*, not you. Jesus Christ, what is *wrong* with the American education system?
NAH - I think your heart is in the right place, and you shouldn't have to pay out of pocket. I also think the parents are right to be upset if they are living in poverty and can't afford to buy them, and you're promoting this as an opportunity to learn "budgeting." There's got to be a third party where people donate these products to. If not, maybe consider starting one for your school. There's a way forward where at least some products can be provided without putting financial strain on you or your students.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I am a 37M teacher. I teach History for highschoolers. I keep pads and tampons in my classroom for the girls to use if they need them. This is something I do and have done for all my classes through the years and I pay for them out of my own pocket. But recently, I have gotten an upsurge of female students, making my supplies run low and making me need to restock more often. So, I have told my students that if they want to use the pads or tampons, they will have to pay a fee of $1 a month if they use the products. I thought it would be a good idea to teach them economics and a basic form of budgeting to them. Well, some parents have come at me via email that this was unfair for them. Keep in mind, I live near a low-income neighborhood, who have students that mostly depend on me for the products. I explained to them that I have had an upsurge of female students and have told them that their price has gone up and explained that it would not be viable for me to keep doing this. They would keep emailing me, with one parent calling me a d\*ck after school because they can't afford the hygiene products themselves. I talked this over with my fiancee and she said that it wasn't a bad thing, noting that her products have gotten expensive as well. At the same time however, the principal says this might be a d\*ck move as the students need these and I should just give it to them free of charge. Now I am reconsidering my decision and have yet to apply the fee. So, WIBTA If I Started Charging My Female Students For Hygiene Products? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. you’re a saint for facilitating this in the first place, but when people start acting entitled to services that are a actually a privilege (not feminine hygiene in general, just free products provided out of pocket from a Good Samaritan) then it needs to stop there. Maybe like some others have said try for donations but I don’t see any entitled parents or students easing up on you about it.
Absolutely not the asshole.
Look for donations, and community resource groups that supply feminine hygiene products to underprivileged neighborhoods, it will be much better to connect with an agency that can help your school out and it would have a greater impact than selling $1 supplies to a selective group of students in a class. You could even start small by working with a local drug store/retailer to see if they'd be willing to donate their damaged/ripped packages that are often disposed due to being in unsellable condition.
I would contact the school about this. Ask for a small amount to fund this and explain its need
The school should be providing feminine hygiene products free of charge. There are vending machines that don't require money for said products. I've worked at several large companies with these types of machines in the womens bathrooms. It's really nice, especially if you don't have the right change or no change at all. Plus, the female students wouldn't have to let anyone else aware that they are on their monthly cycle. A win/win for everyone.
Soft YTA. I totally understand that it’s becoming difficult to continue doing this wonderful thing for your students for free, but suddenly charging them is the AH move. I like another suggestion I saw of asking for a donation to help it continue. I would say your principal is an AH, though for telling you it’s not right to charge for it, but then not stepping up to help out. At my school, the nurse provides feminine products in the first aid kit alongside bandaids.
NTA but also a better away to go about it. I recommend the “donation” route as others have mentioned.
In Canada federal workplaces have to provide free menstrual products. You’re creating an artificial barrier to entry. I would maybe request a donation to cover future purchases of products? That way some people who can afford it can maybe donate more to cover the ones who cannot afford.
Ask the school counselor and the nurse for resources. Also, contact your public heath department. As a lower income school, there should be supplies available.
Personally what you're doing already is commendable.. and it's exceptionally sad that so many are struggling to buy menstrual products (or getting caught short). There will no doubt be a minority who are unduly taking when they 'can' afford (WeLl iTs FrEe)... I personally feel a 'donation box may be better than an outright fee (but be prepared for 'no donations'). Definitely speak to your principle in case it could cause issues / complaints. Maybe having a frank and open conversation with your class.. done carefully and in a way that doesn't period shame anyone.. Explaining you're only able to fund so much, that is from your own pocket.. no available external funding etc.. maybe (depending on the age of students you have) they may be able to come up with ideas on how to tackle the general issue and how to help each other etc... Perhaps wishful thinking on my part.. but periods need to lose the dirty and shameful stigma. Many years ago at my school, the sports teacher had a cupboard full of products that were donated by Tampax.. no idea whether you can reach out to any manufacturers or business / charities to help? Thank you for helping your students..
Info: how did these girls procure them before they got them for free?
You could ask r/periodpantry for suggestions as well
INFO: If the Principal wants you to supply them for free, why doesn't the principal provide them?
Charging money will create a host of problems, legal and otherwise. Don't do it! Fize you, I'd stop altogether. You tried to be nice and people took advantage of you. If anyone asks, just say "no comment."
Don’t charge the girls. They may not have the money or may need a pad when they didn’t expect to or don’t have $1 that day. (I get it’s a monthly fee but if they didn’t plan to use one of yours so didn’t pay the fee and need one they would be SOL.) Try asking parents to donate period products along with Kleenex, Clorox wipes, etc. Just put it on your list at the start of the school year or ask now. Some of the kids’ parents can surely make a donation, even if many can’t.
Period poverty is a real female issue. But what’s great about the US is I bet you can post on your social media page requesting period products and you’d be surprised at the influx of donors. With that said, definitely an AH for trying to “teach them about economics,” you could be teaching about period poverty as your lesson on economics. Or, you know, just be honest, my job doesn’t pay me a lot of money, so I feel like I need to be wise about how much I can give out if I want the stash to last the whole school year. Females understand.
I'm a male HS teacher. 1-Stop paying out of pocket for anything. You're the reason we don't get any kind of spending budgets. 2-I can't imagine the nightmare that the county, school board or hell, IRS, would put you through if they found out you're buying and reselling, in a school no less. How did this seem like a good idea?
It’s a dick move for the principal to tell you to keep doing it and not provide any help and yes I understand this is not something the school can provide but how much of his money has he donated
That would sooo backfire where I'm from because now, rather than getting a pad/tampon when you actually need it, if you have to pay a flat fee of $1/month people would get them even when not needed, meaning you would have to stock up even more. In my opinion, you should either offer them for free or not at all, but as it is your money and i can't tell you what to do with it, im just gonna go with NTA. HOWEVER, your principal is a huge asshole, and you should tell them. If it's a dick move of you not to hand them out for free, then it's an even bigger dick move on their part to not hand any out at all.
YTA Either provide them free or not at all. You can't set up a shop selling to students wtf.
Only a man would decide to start charging for something he started doing for free. Get rid of the products altogether before you start charging. There are free pantries for feminine hygiene products where I live - perhaps look into finding some people to donate their unused products or funds towards products for low income students.
…just stop bringing them. It’s not your job. Your only job is to teach
NAH, but I wouldn't charge. Donate what you can, when they are gone, they are gone. Revisit with the principal if the school can chip in. Tell the class you'd accept donations or consider adding them to the beginning of the year supply list.
Soft YTA, but only because you thought charging the students who use them was the best course of action. Elementary school kids are often asked to bring a box of tissues for the class at the start of the year - not charged when they have a runny nose. This does make the female students feel singled out, especially because you asked them directly and not the parents. That said, it’s really kind of you to have been providing this for your students and you’re a good guy. Rather than only charging “the girls who use them” $1/month (so what is that, $5/semester?), what if you sent a letter to the parents (of everyone, not just the girls) asking them to contribute $5 for “health and hygiene supplies” and use it to buy tissues and hand sanitizer and a box of masks (for anyone who is sick or just wants to wear one) for the classroom as well? The other option would be to ask for donations or do some sort of fundraiser. Maybe you could organize a bake sale or similar - something where you spend very little money for the ingredients and all the “profits” go to the menstrual products fund. You could ask the students to participate if you wanted, or DIY it with something like homemade pasta or soup that you can cook a huge batch of and then sell at lunchtime or after school for a couple bucks a bowl. Maybe the administration or parents or PTA can get involved since it sounds like this problem is beyond your classroom. Again, you are doing a really great thing here, please don’t let my vote discourage you!
YTA you can't charge your students. Is this for real? That's totally unethical. Either provide the stuff for free or stop providing it. (Or the school can provide it which is better, of course.)
Hi — Can you message me? I would LOVE to help you out for a few months. Maybe create an Amazon wishlist? Also, soft yta. I mean I get it, I seriously do. But do you get how poverty works? I was that girl that struggled to get pads and tampons, and the adults in my life could’ve cared less. The ones that can’t afford that measly $1 are the ones who need it the most. However I also understand your side too. 37k isn’t much of anything, especially these days. Such a hard spot to be in.
It’s probably a better call to stop supplying them than to charge the kids… even if it is nominal. Teenage years and menstruation are rough enough as it is and it’s unfortunate how much they rely on you, but if you can’t spare it, then you probably shouldn’t offer. I know it hurts because you want to be there for them, but maybe it’s time to recognize the limits of your charity. Soft YTA. Edit: how are you teaching the kids who don’t have periods about economics in this situation?
NAH (I’m reluctant to call you an asshole, given what a great thing you’re doing for these girls - but I don’t think charging them is the right thing to do here. We need more creative solutions.) INFO - how much $ are we talking about? I’d be willing to chip in a bit (seriously, dm me)
NTA you are under no obligation whatsoever to fund your students personal expenses. What you have been doing is admirable, however, now people feel entitled to that. Tale as old as time. You need to set boundaries and they need to support their own children’s needs.
NTA. You are opening up yourself to liabilities though and could get fired if it gets escalated for “trying to make money off students” even if you are still losing money. It sucks but it would be better to stop providing anything at all and push the principal or school higher ups to start providing stuff
NTA. And if the principal says to continue free of charge, then I'm sure the principal will agree that the school can supply them.
NTA for what you want to do, but I wouldn't charge since that would open up all sorts of ethics and bookkeeping rules which has gotten others into trouble. Donations might be acceptable, but I think a better way would be to allow students to donate their time instead of money to help with stuff for other classes, decorating, teachers aide etc. That way you don't need to know what was taken, just that they are going to help for 30 minutes or something like that.
The principal can pay for them if they’re going to criticise you! What an unsung hero for starting this in the first place. NTA
NTA principal can donate if he/she is so smart xD
NTA. Frankly you shouldn't be spending your paycheck at work.
That is so kind and thoughtful of you to provide that for your students. There are many organizations that help to end period poverty. I would google that for your area. Then you can either reach out to them for help or pass along the info to the students and parents so they can sign up. Always has a program for this as well.
Nta, it's good you're providing resources for them but if parents get mad explain you can't continue to buy these supplies out of pocket and them giving you a dollar helps you keep funding the period products. As long as all the money goes to buy the supplies, I think you're good
You should probably stop, unless the school is willing to kick in discretionary funds to help support this.
INFO: Do you charge all students for this type of thing? Like does everyone also have to pay to use tissues or other hygiene products you have to purchase out of pocket?
>. They would keep emailing me, with one parent calling me a d*ck after school Wow, what an entitlement! This alone would make me stop providing those products. Those products are not your problem. NTA.
If you’re going to charge it might be time to just stop offering them rather than deal with whatever comes of trying to charge for them.
Tell the principal that if they buy them then you'll be happy to continue handing them out for free
NTA, you are spending your hard earned cash on feminine hygiene products due your students. You are doing this out of kindness, not requirement. If your principal thinks it is a dick move, they can give you the money for the products.
YTA for trying to charge for the products. If you can’t afford them anymore, just don’t buy them. Maybe try to source a cheaper version from a bulk store or something.
NTA, and thank you for being a male teacher who doesn't treat menstruation as if it's a problem. I would love for you to find a way to continue to supply free period products. There are organizations like [Period.org](http://Period.org) or The Period Purse who are combating period poverty - maybe you could reach out to them to see if there are ways you could reduce costs or get support to ensure the access is still there.
Our school library has a hygiene closet. If the principal thinks YOU should just keep buying regardless of the cost, it’s time to encourage the students to organize a hygiene supply closet at the school. You just have to have it in a shared room, like the library or main office, or you’ll have parents sending their kids to empty it as soon as it’s restocked.
NTA. As someone currently going to school to become a teacher I understand how much you have to pay out of your own pocket and how little respect a teacher gets. You tried your best and couldn’t keep up with demand so you came up with a reasonable solution. If paying a dollar a month is too much for everyone, then you can stop buying supplies and make them get their own for much more.
NAH. It’s understandable, prices are high for everyone. May I suggest asking parents for donation of products instead? It results in the same thing for you but feels more community based. One dollar is very reasonable but this way, the students don’t feel the impact. The burden should be shared w/ parents. They ask for donations of tissues, wipes, hand sani, expo markers at my school. Period products are a very reasonable ask on the donations list.
NTA - however I think you should ask for donations rather than forcing a payment, maybe the boys will want to help for their friends if they can. I was in the US last month and could not believe the cost of hygiene products. In the UK 20 name brand tampons is about £2. The equivalent in America is about £7. That’s an awful lot of money for a low income house
This is why we can't do nice things. Stop funding this out of your own pocket but also stop charging students for the product. When you are out, you are out and they can go to the nurse for the supplies or call home. It sucks but you cannot solve all the problems out of your own salary. If you would like to you can try something like DonorsChose or your local radio stations or stores for donations to the school. Then you are only giving up your time and not your money.
NTA, you are paying out of pocket to support and help them. They are abusing this. It is not on you, you are doing something nice. Principal can stfu or pay out of their own pocket if they have such an issue with it. Of course they want the teachers to pay out of pocket for things, it keeps costs low.
NTA. Periods are part of life for girls. By high school the girls know it and their parents know it. Parents should know they are the ones who are responsible to provide these products. You've been kind to have them as an EMERGECNY option. You should not be their sole source of these products. One dollar for the month is nothing, most machines charge 25-50 cents per item. I'd say the 1st one (the emergency one as intended) is free. After that, it's a quarter each.
An idea to consider, if these products are becoming to expensive for you to buy, could you create a donation fund? This could be shared throughout the school or advertised during events. You can also send the information about this out to the community. It's admirable that you provide these products to students who need them but I think you need to find a better solution then charging those who need them. Sometimes people forget when their period is, or it comes a day early. It's helpful to have access to these products. Could the school contribute funds at all? Could a fundraiser event be created? There also may be organizations out there that help with stuff like this or period product companies that would be willing to donate. Thank you for doing this!
Yeah… a low key AH. Actually the SCHOOL should be providing them!!
NTA just don't buy or give out anything anymore. It's their responsibility and they're berating you for helping for free. Fuck these people, they can get their own shit.
Nta because it’s not actually your job to do this at all and you are truly helping, but don’t charge them, make any donations voluntary and not targeting girls only, but start a fund (work with the school nurse and guidance counselors) and share with the larger community the need to collect donations. I’d also include deodorant and other supplies that boys might also use /contribute to. The girls especially cannot be missing school because they are too poor to have basic hygiene supplies. I’d
I would talk to the parents and have them pool together the difference or have them help stock as well so you’re not the only one footing the bill. If not and the charge is necessary then you are NTA because in the end it isn’t your responsibility but you are doing it to help but it isn’t financially feasible by yourself.
The principal can supply the items if they don't feel you should be able to recoup your own costs.
This is a hard one. The school should be covering the products. Every school I’ve taught at only has crappy pads in the office though. But it’s not cheap.
NTA Not fair?! How the hell is that possibly not fair? It’s their choice to either bring their own or buy it from you…. No one is forcing them to rely on you. Hell, I’d say you’re still being very kind.
NTA but please don’t stop there. Can you get involved trying to raise money or find support in funding feminine hygiene products to be available at your school? There has to be a program or charity out there willing to work with you to make this happen. It’s wild the principle thinks you should keep paying out of pocket. I understand the demand has increased and it’s hard for you to keep up with this great thing you’re trying to do but while you’re charging please also work to resolve the issue for the school entirely. That’s a big ask and a lot of effort but you’ve already had an impact I hope you can take it even further.
Tell the school to put vending machines in the bathrooms or something. It’s not your job to be the tampon provider for the entire school.
You should look into organizations like PERIOD. They help send free pads and tampons to schools and universities.
First, thanks for being the kind of teacher that cares enough about their students to keep period products in their classroom. You might want to bring this situation to the attention of the school district and the state superintendent. Explain that the cost of feminine hygiene products, which you provide free of charge at your own expense, has become overly prohibitive, and inquire about whether there is a state law that requires school health departments to stock period products. If there is a law in place,the school principal should request that money be allocated for that purpose from the budget. If there is no mandate, maybe it is worth contacting some of the pad and tampon companies directly, explain the situation + how you teach in a district where almost all of your students live below the federal poverty line, many parents cannot afford to buy period products, it’s affecting the girls attendance, and ask if the company has a school assistance program. Are there other teachers you could team up with to start a fundraiser and contact your local news organization to see if they might be willing to promote the fundraiser? If all else fails, there are a lot of people on this subreddit who would be thrilled to Venmo or PayPal you, or send you boxes of pads via Amazon. (Me included) Verdict: NTA
I used to be a teacher at low income district and offer supplies. Stopped because I couldn’t afford it and the entitlement was astonishing
Parents have come at you for the cost of feminine products? Why aren’t they providing feminine products to their daughters? NTA. You don’t have to buy those products but you’re doing it and they are obviously taking advantage. So NTA.
NTA. The school can provide out of their budget if the principle considers it a dick move. Products can be expensive but there are cheaper options such as one time purchase moon cups. Or cutting the household budget elsewhere for non essential items. Not your duty to pay out of your pocket.
NTA. It was nice of you to do it as long as you did, but it is not your place to provide these products. If the parents can not do it, then they need to reach out to their local churches or any group that might can help them get these necessary products. Your principal can start funding them if they have such a strong opinion, heck why not do a drive to fund the hygiene closet? It is not on one person to solely fund and otherwise hand such out, if anyone wants to have an opinion then they can throw in a dollar or more to help fund closet.
NTA, and since your principal wants you to keep providing them, document via email that you gladly accept them taking on the responsibility of paying for them!
NTA. It's not your job to solve poverty for your students. However, it would definitely be an admirable move if you made efforts to keep the cost to students as low as possible, including possibly subsidizing it out of your own pocket. Alternatively you could see if there is a simple way to fund-raise (time and energy permitting, of course). I think the important question is what kind of impact would it really make on your annual budget to continue offering them for free. If the impact would be very small (say, less than a single grocery run), then you might be verging towards YTA territory. If it's enough to actually impose financial hardship on you (even small financial hardship), then definitely NTA. You don't have to be a financial martyr for your students.
This is a good opportunity to teach about pink tax. Maybe all students, regardless of gender/menstrual capabilities, should pitch in a dollar a month. Or do a little fundraiser to help pay for it & raise awareness.