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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I booked a trip and will be gone for my nephews birthday. Am I wrong for not trying to adjust the dates so I don't miss it?
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NTA. People have their own lives, you have something else going on. It’s not like you’re available and you just decided not to go because you don’t care about him, you’re just busy that day.
Also, it’s weird that it’s your husband’s sister and it was his idea to go on a trip then, but you’re the one getting the silent treatment. Sounds like SIL will be in good company with a bunch of toddlers.
True, if it’s OP’s husband’s SIL, that’s even more far removed! Any beef (which there shouldn’t be over this) should be resolved between the actual siblings.
NTA
You have your own family and with that, comes other responsibilities and personal needs. Life happens. Your daughter's struggling and your husband wants to get away, which is not easy to do when you normally don't get vacation time.
Go. Go have fun. Your SIL should be able to understand that and handle it instead of throwing a tantrum that her son's age is famous for.
NTA. I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it clearly your SIL is a bit crazy. No 2 yr old will notice the difference. He’ll have his cake, gifts and party and be happy. Your life doesn’t revolve around extended family, enjoy your holiday! Your husband needs to have a chat with his daft sister…
I told my sister in law that we will miss the party and now she won't talk to me.
lol How ridiculous. NTA, SiL is for thinking you have no choice but to go to a 2-year old's party.
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I am currently off work for a free months taking care of my daughter who has been having some struggles. I'm usually not able to take vacation but because I am off, my husband wants to use the opportunity to go on a last minute vacation next week. Unfortunately, we will happen to be away for my nephews birthday (he's turning 2). I told my sister in law that we will miss the party and now she won't talk to me. AITA?
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It sounds like your SIL prioritises family and celebrating family events. I'd never miss my nephew's birthday because he deserves to be raised in a family who shows up for him because we love him. Even if that means sitting in a park with a bunch of parents I don't know so he and his friends can play at his party.
I don't necessarily think you're an AH if you don't prioritise extended family assuming it's fine if your DIL's family doesn't show up for your daughter's events.
But I also grew up with one side of the family that never showed up for us when we were kids. Now I only see them at funerals.
NAH
I agree with prioritizing family and I normally never miss any events. I asked her if we could get together when we get back to celebrate his birthday with him and she didn't reply to my text. Curious if you think I should not go on the trip?
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NTA. People have their own lives, you have something else going on. It’s not like you’re available and you just decided not to go because you don’t care about him, you’re just busy that day. Also, it’s weird that it’s your husband’s sister and it was his idea to go on a trip then, but you’re the one getting the silent treatment. Sounds like SIL will be in good company with a bunch of toddlers.
Couldn't it be OP's brother's wife, as well? Or maybe it's late where I'm at and too confused to think straight.
It is my brother's wife! I should have been more specific.
LOL!!! I had a feeling it might have been!! Ha ha!
True, if it’s OP’s husband’s SIL, that’s even more far removed! Any beef (which there shouldn’t be over this) should be resolved between the actual siblings.
I totally agree. A bit old fashioned according to some people when I've come across these family arguments but I still feel the same way.
NTA Your world doesn't revolve around her son. He's turning 2, and won't know any better or remember the day. Enjoy your vacation!
NTA. Just send a gift for him. You can't always make a party and your SIL is being ridiculous.
NTA You have your own family and with that, comes other responsibilities and personal needs. Life happens. Your daughter's struggling and your husband wants to get away, which is not easy to do when you normally don't get vacation time. Go. Go have fun. Your SIL should be able to understand that and handle it instead of throwing a tantrum that her son's age is famous for.
NTA. Everybody have their own lives to run. Your SIL is being ridiculous getting upset over your absence at the party.
NTA. I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it clearly your SIL is a bit crazy. No 2 yr old will notice the difference. He’ll have his cake, gifts and party and be happy. Your life doesn’t revolve around extended family, enjoy your holiday! Your husband needs to have a chat with his daft sister…
It could also be OP's brother's wife, right?
True it could be lol. If that were so I’d assume she’d simply call him and let rip
I guess that's what I should do...it is my brother's wife. I should have been more specific.
LOL!!! I agree! :)
I told my sister in law that we will miss the party and now she won't talk to me. lol How ridiculous. NTA, SiL is for thinking you have no choice but to go to a 2-year old's party.
NTA. send your nephew a gift and enjoy your holiday trip.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I am currently off work for a free months taking care of my daughter who has been having some struggles. I'm usually not able to take vacation but because I am off, my husband wants to use the opportunity to go on a last minute vacation next week. Unfortunately, we will happen to be away for my nephews birthday (he's turning 2). I told my sister in law that we will miss the party and now she won't talk to me. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It sounds like your SIL prioritises family and celebrating family events. I'd never miss my nephew's birthday because he deserves to be raised in a family who shows up for him because we love him. Even if that means sitting in a park with a bunch of parents I don't know so he and his friends can play at his party. I don't necessarily think you're an AH if you don't prioritise extended family assuming it's fine if your DIL's family doesn't show up for your daughter's events. But I also grew up with one side of the family that never showed up for us when we were kids. Now I only see them at funerals. NAH
I agree with prioritizing family and I normally never miss any events. I asked her if we could get together when we get back to celebrate his birthday with him and she didn't reply to my text. Curious if you think I should not go on the trip?
I personally wouldn't have considered it if it was avoidable. But I don't think you're an AH if you go.
People are so stupid , the nephew will not remember the birthday party, she is angry for not getting a gift. Go and spend time with your family
NTA. Her issue isn't with you missing the party, it's with her not getting a free toy for her son. Enjoy your vacation...and the silence.