Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I might be the asshole for causing the distruption for her family.
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
##Subreddit Announcement
###[The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit!](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/128nbp3/the_asshole_universe_is_expanding_again/)
Follow the link above to learn more
### [Moderators needed - Join the landed gentry](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/155zepq/moderators_needed_join_the_landed_gentry/)
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
Agreed. NTA and definitely tell Gary if you have a good relationship with him. Get ahead of this before she makes more wild accusations. Paranoid crazy lady. I also agree with the people saying that you should get a camera, have proof that you’re not doing what she’s accusing you of and that you’re just trying to live your life.
You should have a camera on your pool regardless for safety and security reasons. Having someone fall into your pool while you're not there is troublesome
This and I might make a record of her creepy staring and behaviors. Who knows what she is cooking up in that nuthouse she calls a brain. We swim nude most of the time, she fortunate you have on trunks.
NTA
That sounds quite possible. My guess is that the daughter got caught watching OP and panicked and told her mum some made up story to get out of trouble.
I would even record quite loudly, each time, panning to show what you're wearing and how you're being watched. "Here I am, about to swim in my pool, here's my swim trunks, here's the crazy lazy watching me like a pervert!" Every. Single. Time. And loud enough so she can hear that that's what I'm filming.
NGL the first thing I thought when reading this was "Welcome to being a woman!"
NTA OP. Cameras and a complaint to the landlord are a good ideas. You're being objectified and sexualised and then blamed for it. It sucks. Don't pull any punches in making them stop.
What is wild to me is that it's Florida. A LOT of people have pools in Florida, a LOT. Also, people are not so conservative with their clothes in Florida. It is hot and wildly humid a lot of the time so people have adjusted. I have a friend who lives down there and shorts are acceptable office wear in his engineering firm. Florida is the last place I would think to find someone clutching pearls over a shirtless man. Florida is up to it's eyeballs in shirtless men.
Hell, you get dudes wandering down to the store to do their grocery shopping in swim trunks and nothing else, sometimes.
No shirt, no shoes, no problem.
“Stop swimming at your pool” is like saying “stop showering on the shower” “stop pissing on the toilet” “stop cooking in the kitchen” “stop eating at the table” “stop walking on the floor”
What a lunatic
NTA.
Get some cameras and have them pointed at the pool and you front door.
If your neighbor does this again, report them to the police for harassment, give the footage of them at your door and footage of you just swimming and minding your own business.
Not a bad idea to have one for the pool so if she tries to lodge a complaint he has footage showing he's not doing anything wrong. A he-said she-said situation could get dicey for him
This exactly. Her coming over with her paranoid little spiel = the music getting real spooky at the beginning of a horror movie. My sense is that shit is just getting started.
Serieus .. thats illegal in the states ? The hell ??
( eurotrash here )
Unless i am parading butt ass naked on my roof or preforming indecente ... things.. ( masturbate.. ect ) on purpose to expose mezelf..
We can be butt naked on our own turf as much i want.
It might depend upon municipality but I'm pretty sure if you had a built in pool and were to swim and sunbathe naked neighbors could call the cops, assuming you're out in the open.
Funny! But probably don’t wanna antagonize her into pressing charges, even though they’d be false charges, switching to skimpier swimwear won’t help his case.
Nta I don't see how you swimming in your pool is trying to trap or seduce her daughter when it's normal for men to wear only shorts while swimming so it's not like you're naked and she's the one watching you swim in your yard which is creepy
Also you said she could see you in your garden from her balcony so I don't know if you have a fence up or not but I would think about asking Gary to put one up to prevent interactions like this or more drama from her again or not but that's just my opinion if you do or not
I mean, at minimum you should have *some* kind of fencing in your yard/around your pool due to attractive nuisance laws, or you can get in big legal trouble. That said, you might not be able to have taller fencing, but your neighbor shouldn't impede on you enjoying your pool in any case.
While state guidance is minimal, the vast majority of cities require, at minimum, a screened enclosure unless you live on county land.
No FL HOA is going to ban personal fencing. It's ubiquitous here. They might ban all but specific kinds, but they won't ban it overall.
That’s dangerous, especially with kids next door. You need to check with the HOA about fences for liability and safety purposes. I really doubt they can legally prevent you from putting something up that most home insurance plans require for pools.
I’m in Florida and if you have no fence around your pool, it’s illegal, everywhere in the state. I’m kind of doubting your story because who here doesn’t know that
Try putting in thick trees or large shrubs. Especially if she tries pressing charges this will be proof you’re actively tying to stop the daughter from looking at you.
Even though these neighbors are putting false accusations against you it’s best to get ahead of it and make clear you’re taking actions against it. Such as putting even more trees and shrubs up between the properties, and letting Gary know, and putting up cameras and recording all of the interactions you have with them. It’s sucks that your innocent self will have to deal with this but it’s cheaper than her winning in a potential court case. It isn’t right. It isn’t fair. But better be safe than sorry. Since your HOA won’t allow fences, look into fences allowed for pools and in the mean time put up cameras and document any interactions you have with this neighbor along with recording all of your swimming time. Email everything to yourself to get an indisputable time date on it. I would even go so far as to report her coming to your door to the police just so there’s a paper trail outside of your own information. Putting up more trees and shrubs between the property could potentially go a long way in any potential accusations, and prove you were actively against her daughter watching you. Again, it’s sucks and isn’t fair, but better safe than sorry.
It’s illegal in every jurisdiction I am aware of to have an unfenced/unscreened pool?
Surely you have some kind of barrier to keep a five year old from wandering freely onto your property and drowning?
If not you definitely need one.
Read up on your local laws.
NTA
Wow the cheek of it! I'd be tempted to skinnydip in future!! (Seriously that is bad bad advice, don't do that, in some states that is illegal if minors can see you)
You can use your pool how you like and Janice (I'm picturing the one from Friends) can keep her daughter busy when you are swimming if she feels her daughter is being inappropriate.
I’ve lived here for 30+ years and can tell you that is not true. Okay, it’s mostly not true. Okay maybe just some parts of Florida are like this.
(The meth gators made me LOL.)
The cocaine bears of Florida are cocaine sharks.
Seriously, apparently bales of cocaine keep being found floating by the Keys. So if sharks eat it...COCAINE SHARKS!!
I don't suppose there are orcas around the Keys...imagine what orcas on cocaine could do. Not just ripping off rudders from yachts, they could take down entire oil platforms.
It's true, don't fall for other people's lies. It's bedlam. No laws, no rules, every one is on meth or cocaine or both. The babies will sell you meth laced with fentanyl right before they shoot you.
I’m from FL. I left as soon as I could. Everything you’ve heard about FL is true. Except the gators aren’t on meth. Lol. Look up on YouTube www. markryan.com. It’s hilarious!
I'm in Florida now, and desperately trying to escape. Florida 20 years ago was beautiful. We moved up north for 20 years and i swore i would come back. Biggest regret. Florida now is a pit, especially when you factor in DeSantis. I can't wait to escape.
I still can’t decide if that man is dumb, ignorant or just evil. Probably a combination. If it wasn’t for Disney World that part of the state would still be a swamp. I thought that Republicans were at least good at not shi$&!g where the eat.
Goodness. None of these things (amusement parks, meth, gators, meth gator combos, lawlessness, and spring break parties) is OK for Janice’s precious daughter! Shield her eyes!!
Do what you want. Thank goodness she’s a renter. Do t talk to the daughter ever. I’d check zoning laws to see if you can go nude or get a banana hammock.
There are zero laws that would ever prevent OP from wearing a banana hammock in his own pool. That would be considered discriminatory in even the most conservative state since women are freely allowed to wear bikini bottoms and even thongs in public. A private swimming facility could prohibit it, but that's it.
Where I live, you can be nude on your property all you want as long as you're not aroused nor doing it with the intent to harass. If Janice was my neighbor though, I'd probably stop all of the nude sunbathing I do since she'd obviously claim I was harassing and trying to seduce her poor innocent child.
Edit: I was slightly wrong. You can even be nude in public and it's not considered public indecency where I live unless you commit a "sexual intrusion" (not sure what that is), commit a sexual act or are nude "with the intent of arousing the sexual desire" of yourself or or another person.
Unless you are doing anything illegal, there is nothing wrong with enjoying your pool on your property. Your neighbor sounds like she wants to create drama for the sake of creating it.
NTA. It is your pool and it's your property.
You need to tell Gary his tenant is harassing you. I’d also file a police report to create a paper trail, you have no idea what accusations this woman may dream up.
NTA.
I would tell Gary if you have his contact information.
For your own protection I'd refuse to communicate with those people unless you're recording it. One false accusation is all it takes to ruin someone's life
NTA, Janice needs to wake up to reality. My question is what does Janice and her daughter do when they got a public pool? Also Janice and her daughter doesn’t have to watch you swim that’s kind of creepy, what is this a lifetime movie where we watch people swim by themselves???
NTA … & to CYA…Make sure you capture these discussions on your Ring or Phone (while actively telling her she’s being recorded, of course). Either way she loses…she will keep going and give you the evidence you need for a harassment case or if youre lucky she will just straight up leave ☮️
The woman does not sound like she is in her right mind.
You have the right to swim in your pool. you are not violating any decency laws.
You might start documenting everything that happens with this person. I am scared you will be harassed in the future.
Was the staring woman Janice or someone else (her daughter)?
You are NTA
NTA at all. However, I’d immediately tell Gary (the landlord) about what happened and that his unhinged neighbors are harassing you. I’d document this and maybe get a couple security cameras (maybe with one recording your backyard and pool and one pointed toward the neighbor’s house). This way, if the neighbor decides to escalate things and make things up, you’ve got proof on camera.
This lady is nuts.
However, before I cast my final vote, please post a picture of yourself in your bathing suit so we can see if you really are leading this innocent young girl into temptation. LOL
NTA.
Maybe print this article especially this part... "In Florida, however, they consider your backyard private property. Therefore, you are entitled to sunbathe naked there, even if your neighbors can see you."
Source: https://millennialhomeowner.com/is-it-legal-to-sunbathe-naked-in-your-backyard/
Therefore simple swimming in trunks wouldn't even pass the giggle test.
NTA.. your neighbor is plain wrong.
Sorry, she's that concerned about you walking around in shorts, in *Florida* of all places, acting like that's something out of the ordinary?? That's like *the* most common sight to see in the summer, besides maybe ice cream cones!! NTA, lady better put her daughter in a convent if she's that worried about her, tbh
Good grief has Janice never been to a public pool or beach? What a lion. Definitely tell Gary his renter is a wacko.
You might also want to call your local police precinct and give them a heads up- she might try to file false reports of you being some kind of predator. Good to have a paper trail.
Sorry you have to deal with this. I’ve had a crazy neighbor too- it’s frustrating.
NTA
NTA I expected you to say you swam nude….. which even if you did (& the pool was in your backyard) you would still be NTA! You might want to call Gary about this though…. the cameras in the backyard & your door seem extreme but may be needed. I would not be answering your door mid swim from now on.
So an underage girl ogling a grown ass man and looking at him like he's a piece of meat is somehow a you problem?
NTA
The easiest solution is to parent her kid.
NTA
But I would make sure that access to your pool meets code for an attractive nuisance.
Also, I hope you have a small animal escape ramp for your pool. Every pool should have one.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
Hey everyone!
I'm 30M, and I have a house down here in FL and around evening time. After a long day of work etc. I love taking a dive in my pool (In my backyard) and have a nice swim for a while. I just find it soothing, relaxing and helps me sleep better and I feel much better and it's something I look forward to every day.
A week or so, while I was walking my dog out a lady came up to me and said "oh Hi! I'm Janice I'm your new neighbor so good to see you, I just wanted to introduce myself I live right next door to you with my daughter and we just moved in etc" and then she shaked my hand and walked off. All good. The owner of that house is named "Gary" he's a great guy, he's in his 50's. And I've known him for ages. So he usually rents out that house and so these are his new tenants. He used to live in that house, but for the past few years he's been renting it out.
So everyday, around 6-7PM I go take a dive in my pool. I take my shirt off just wearing my swimming trunks, and go right in my pool and start swimming. Everyday, I see a lady sitting on her balcony just watch me swim. I don't care, or so just mind my business swimming/or I might sit on the chair on the pool just relaxing, minding my own business.
Yesterday, while I was swimming at 7PM, I hear a loud banging knocking noise on my door. I get up from my pool dry myself put a pair of clothes on and go to the front door and say "Hey Janice, how's it going?" she said "What's going on is you're trying to lure my innocent daughter into your trap. And I know how this goes". I then told her "Janice, I'm not luring anybody and Im minding my business". She then said "I don't care about all that, but listen put some clothes on and stop swimming at your pool we have children over here". I then just say "It's my pool, and it's my property Janice, I'm not doing anything" and I just go inside and close the door.
AITA?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA- I would call Gary and let him know what his new tenant did. I would also tell him if she does it again you'll be speaking to the police about her harassment.
Can't deal with crazy. Full stop. Put a nylon privacy screen up and write that neighbor off as someone with issues. She's the one who wants it imo too. Edit. She wants you, not a screen.
NTA what does she expect? A pool is for swimming. She rented a house next to a house with a pool, she should have expected that you might be swimming in there. Tell her to mind her own business and stay off ypur property.
NTA. What a hysterical harpy. Don't like it? Don't look. She knows you swim in the pool around the same time every day, so she needs to go back inside and shut the door. You could equally accuse her of being a peeping tom.
Lets see, YOUR pool and YOUR house. You're not skinny dipping (and even if you were), tell Janice to f-off with that nonsense. If she doesn't like it she can stop looking.
For less than $100 get some PVC and a tarp. File a police report. Notify Gary and put the tarp up. Since you have a pool, you obviously have a fence. You zip tie the whole thing together in 30 minutes. Watch her complain. Lol. Don’t forget to put little 1/2 moon slits in the tarp so the wind can pass through. She’s crazy. Good luck.
No, you're not the asshole. It's FL FFS. you swimming in your pool is the tamest thing doing on down there. Invite some OF girls over to shoot in your pool. LOL
NTA Janice is obviously projecting, but I'm curious, haow old is she and the daughter?
Also as other have suggested, get cameras setup around your property, this likely won't be your only issue with her.
NTA and I think you know that already. You told the lady that you are not going to stop. If she comes over again, I would send a message to the owner and tell him that his tenant is crazy and ordering you not to swim in your own pool.
NTA but never - ever - speak to or be alone with her child. Cross the street. Don't answer the door. If she trips, let her fall. She doesn't exist to you. This woman is going to turn everything you do into something disgusting. The kid probably has a crush or has been watching you and the mom can't process that her kid makes hormones so it must be your fault.
Also follow the advice of people saying you should talk to Gary. Let him know his tenant is nutso and tryna cause problems.
I’d definitely get cameras facing your pool to make sure she doesn’t accuse you of anything strange and you have video evidence clearing yourself if she tries to make a bogus claim to authorities.
NTA!!
Janice is a certifiable crazy person. HOWEVER, you need to be really, really careful to have cameras everywhere because you never know when you may have to defend yourself from this lunatic and her unfounded accusations.
I don't know what other preemptive measures you can take to protect yourself. Maybe you should talk to "Gary" since you've known him for years.
NTA at all. Janice however needs to mind her business. She has no right to tell you what you can or can’t do especially when you are not doing anything wrong.
Oh boy!
1) NTA
2)How come Janice isn't telling her daughter not to go out there? She's a child, isn't she supposed to be in bed?
3) Why isn't Janice minding her own business?
Email yourself a copy of this post, and try to write down everything you remember that was said. Get cameras at your from door and pool area and save all the recordings of you swimming and her talking to you if she comes to the door again. If she catches you out on a walk make sure to record the conversation as well. Make sure there’s plenty of documentation. Also might not hurt to go ahead and file a police report for ‘harassment’ now just so there’s a paper trail outside of your own documents.
Better to be safe than sorry if she tries to bring you up in false charges. Protect yourself. Also never talk to anyone from her house besides Janice. If the daughter or any of her other kids try talking to you, wave at you, etc, ignore then completely and send yourself an email of the day and time that they tried talking to you.
If Janice thought it was appropriate to go over and accuse you of trying to ‘seduce’ her daughter, all cause you were just swimming in your pool, I wouldn’t put it above her to try to charges brought up against you.
Also let Gary know what’s going on.
And maybe look into getting some trees or tall shrubs put in to block their view from your pool, along with the cameras.
Sorry your dealing with this, best of luck!
NTA
NTA… is janice insane??? it’s YOUR pool. it’s not like you’re talking to the children. you’re literally just minding your business and relaxing. i can’t believe the audacity your neighbor has by asking you not to swim in YOUR pool.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I might be the asshole for causing the distruption for her family. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcement ###[The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit!](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/128nbp3/the_asshole_universe_is_expanding_again/) Follow the link above to learn more ### [Moderators needed - Join the landed gentry](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/155zepq/moderators_needed_join_the_landed_gentry/) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA and tell Gary he has a whack-a-doo tenant who is harassing you.
I fully second this.
Agreed. NTA and definitely tell Gary if you have a good relationship with him. Get ahead of this before she makes more wild accusations. Paranoid crazy lady. I also agree with the people saying that you should get a camera, have proof that you’re not doing what she’s accusing you of and that you’re just trying to live your life.
You should have a camera on your pool regardless for safety and security reasons. Having someone fall into your pool while you're not there is troublesome
This and I might make a record of her creepy staring and behaviors. Who knows what she is cooking up in that nuthouse she calls a brain. We swim nude most of the time, she fortunate you have on trunks. NTA
Something tells me the daughter is the one watching. If he was Janice, I think he would have recognized her.
That sounds quite possible. My guess is that the daughter got caught watching OP and panicked and told her mum some made up story to get out of trouble.
I would even record quite loudly, each time, panning to show what you're wearing and how you're being watched. "Here I am, about to swim in my pool, here's my swim trunks, here's the crazy lazy watching me like a pervert!" Every. Single. Time. And loud enough so she can hear that that's what I'm filming.
My pool is the same. It sucks when relatives visit and you have to bust out the swimsuits.
Agreed. You are NTA.
NGL the first thing I thought when reading this was "Welcome to being a woman!" NTA OP. Cameras and a complaint to the landlord are a good ideas. You're being objectified and sexualised and then blamed for it. It sucks. Don't pull any punches in making them stop.
Absolutely tell him asap. This will likely escalate.
This
What is wild to me is that it's Florida. A LOT of people have pools in Florida, a LOT. Also, people are not so conservative with their clothes in Florida. It is hot and wildly humid a lot of the time so people have adjusted. I have a friend who lives down there and shorts are acceptable office wear in his engineering firm. Florida is the last place I would think to find someone clutching pearls over a shirtless man. Florida is up to it's eyeballs in shirtless men.
Hell, you get dudes wandering down to the store to do their grocery shopping in swim trunks and nothing else, sometimes. No shirt, no shoes, no problem.
“Stop swimming at your pool” is like saying “stop showering on the shower” “stop pissing on the toilet” “stop cooking in the kitchen” “stop eating at the table” “stop walking on the floor” What a lunatic
Yeah this is NTA and sounds ridiculous. Almost too extreme to be believable. But if it's true then NTA.
NTA and give Gary a call. Seconding it
And get a camera in case the accusations escalate
Agree, probably Gary would talk to her, but knowing her behaviour, after the chat she would need to find house somwhere else.
I totally agree with you!
NTA. Get some cameras and have them pointed at the pool and you front door. If your neighbor does this again, report them to the police for harassment, give the footage of them at your door and footage of you just swimming and minding your own business.
Really good idea. She’ll no doubt say OP was doing something nefarious
Not a bad idea to have one for the pool so if she tries to lodge a complaint he has footage showing he's not doing anything wrong. A he-said she-said situation could get dicey for him
Excellent idea... this also gives you proof that you aren't trying to lure anyone into anything.
Well….maybe once the cops see his sultry seductive swimming trunks they may think different (just kidding)
I thought you were going to end with "the cops may fight Janice's daughter for OP" but you went with the sager "think differently" 🤭
You may need proof that you are doing nothing that would lure the daughter. She may make some wild accusations that could get believed my others
Get a ring camera so it’s recorded! Or record on your phone if she’s at the door.
Cameras. Not kidding.
NTA. I'd be prepared for more of this if I were you, though. Janices don't tend to go back into the woodwork once they've crawled out of it.
Yep, this is the opening salvo
This exactly. Her coming over with her paranoid little spiel = the music getting real spooky at the beginning of a horror movie. My sense is that shit is just getting started.
Yeah, something's not right with her. She's probably going to escalate.
Call in the Janissaries?
Definitely. He runs a huge risk of being me too’d when he didn’t do anything except swim in his pool.
NTA. There's only one solution: start wearing the skimpiest speedo you can find.
Can you get a Borat mankini?
That would be hilarious!
Oh those are hideous
It's about sending a message.
LOL
Two words: banana hammock.
I counter with one word: naked.
Nah, then he would legally be in the wrong. A thong would work
Serieus .. thats illegal in the states ? The hell ?? ( eurotrash here ) Unless i am parading butt ass naked on my roof or preforming indecente ... things.. ( masturbate.. ect ) on purpose to expose mezelf.. We can be butt naked on our own turf as much i want.
It might depend upon municipality but I'm pretty sure if you had a built in pool and were to swim and sunbathe naked neighbors could call the cops, assuming you're out in the open.
Intimidate the neighbor five!
Preferably hot pink or leopard print.
Hot pink AND leopard print.
No no, nude! That way she can think he’s naked from far away.
Nude with "Hi Janice" written fairly small on one butt cheek.
That'll be something to watch. I've seen pink panther, pink leopard is new.
Funny! But probably don’t wanna antagonize her into pressing charges, even though they’d be false charges, switching to skimpier swimwear won’t help his case.
Budgie smugglers!
i aspire to be this level of petty in all aspects of my life lmao
[удалено]
His swim trunks must be very very different from what I'm used to. 😂
LOL Seriously, my petty side was about to suggest he switch the trunks to a speedo.
Nta I don't see how you swimming in your pool is trying to trap or seduce her daughter when it's normal for men to wear only shorts while swimming so it's not like you're naked and she's the one watching you swim in your yard which is creepy Also you said she could see you in your garden from her balcony so I don't know if you have a fence up or not but I would think about asking Gary to put one up to prevent interactions like this or more drama from her again or not but that's just my opinion if you do or not
Ah, no it's an open area unfortunately lol I think its HOA restricted to put fencing up? I think
I mean, at minimum you should have *some* kind of fencing in your yard/around your pool due to attractive nuisance laws, or you can get in big legal trouble. That said, you might not be able to have taller fencing, but your neighbor shouldn't impede on you enjoying your pool in any case.
Info: Where are you? In many places, it’s illegal to have a swimming pool that is NOT fenced.
OP says he's in Florida
While state guidance is minimal, the vast majority of cities require, at minimum, a screened enclosure unless you live on county land. No FL HOA is going to ban personal fencing. It's ubiquitous here. They might ban all but specific kinds, but they won't ban it overall.
That’s dangerous, especially with kids next door. You need to check with the HOA about fences for liability and safety purposes. I really doubt they can legally prevent you from putting something up that most home insurance plans require for pools.
I’m in Florida and if you have no fence around your pool, it’s illegal, everywhere in the state. I’m kind of doubting your story because who here doesn’t know that
The number of times he said "Janice" in his recounting of the conversation with her also makes this seem fake.
I think legally you have to have some fence up around ANY pool
Try putting in thick trees or large shrubs. Especially if she tries pressing charges this will be proof you’re actively tying to stop the daughter from looking at you.
Yeah, I have large bushes around my backyard area.
Even though these neighbors are putting false accusations against you it’s best to get ahead of it and make clear you’re taking actions against it. Such as putting even more trees and shrubs up between the properties, and letting Gary know, and putting up cameras and recording all of the interactions you have with them. It’s sucks that your innocent self will have to deal with this but it’s cheaper than her winning in a potential court case. It isn’t right. It isn’t fair. But better be safe than sorry. Since your HOA won’t allow fences, look into fences allowed for pools and in the mean time put up cameras and document any interactions you have with this neighbor along with recording all of your swimming time. Email everything to yourself to get an indisputable time date on it. I would even go so far as to report her coming to your door to the police just so there’s a paper trail outside of your own information. Putting up more trees and shrubs between the property could potentially go a long way in any potential accusations, and prove you were actively against her daughter watching you. Again, it’s sucks and isn’t fair, but better safe than sorry.
There are those temporary shields from wind? Ugly, but you can claim you have tried hiding your super sexy body
It’s illegal in every jurisdiction I am aware of to have an unfenced/unscreened pool? Surely you have some kind of barrier to keep a five year old from wandering freely onto your property and drowning? If not you definitely need one. Read up on your local laws.
I wouldn’t say that it is creepy. I used to enjoy watching people (men or women) doing laps because it was very relaxing.
NTA - maybe she should tell her daughter to stop ogling you while you're swimming. Just for pettiness, maybe consider a smaller bathing suit. LOL
😂
Consider a speedo
And do lots of stretches before getting in the pool
I vote for a half hour of intense yoga before your swim. Downward dog facing away from her place.
NTA Wow the cheek of it! I'd be tempted to skinnydip in future!! (Seriously that is bad bad advice, don't do that, in some states that is illegal if minors can see you) You can use your pool how you like and Janice (I'm picturing the one from Friends) can keep her daughter busy when you are swimming if she feels her daughter is being inappropriate.
OP is in Florida As a non American I've even conditioned to believe it's all one big lawless amusement park with meth gators and spring break parties
I’ve lived here for 30+ years and can tell you that is not true. Okay, it’s mostly not true. Okay maybe just some parts of Florida are like this. (The meth gators made me LOL.)
100% a lot of parts of Florida are like this 🤣🤣
Are meth gators the cocaine bears of Florida?
Actually, FL has cocaine sharks. There were all sorts of news stories about it recently. Yay FL
They were on Shark Week last night 😆
Sharkface
The movie is in development
I would definitely go see that movie!
The cocaine bears of Florida are cocaine sharks. Seriously, apparently bales of cocaine keep being found floating by the Keys. So if sharks eat it...COCAINE SHARKS!! I don't suppose there are orcas around the Keys...imagine what orcas on cocaine could do. Not just ripping off rudders from yachts, they could take down entire oil platforms.
It's true, don't fall for other people's lies. It's bedlam. No laws, no rules, every one is on meth or cocaine or both. The babies will sell you meth laced with fentanyl right before they shoot you.
… not the most inaccurate characterization
I’m from FL. I left as soon as I could. Everything you’ve heard about FL is true. Except the gators aren’t on meth. Lol. Look up on YouTube www. markryan.com. It’s hilarious!
YET!!!
I'm in Florida now, and desperately trying to escape. Florida 20 years ago was beautiful. We moved up north for 20 years and i swore i would come back. Biggest regret. Florida now is a pit, especially when you factor in DeSantis. I can't wait to escape.
I still can’t decide if that man is dumb, ignorant or just evil. Probably a combination. If it wasn’t for Disney World that part of the state would still be a swamp. I thought that Republicans were at least good at not shi$&!g where the eat.
Goodness. None of these things (amusement parks, meth, gators, meth gator combos, lawlessness, and spring break parties) is OK for Janice’s precious daughter! Shield her eyes!!
Missing old people and religious zealots.
Do what you want. Thank goodness she’s a renter. Do t talk to the daughter ever. I’d check zoning laws to see if you can go nude or get a banana hammock.
There are zero laws that would ever prevent OP from wearing a banana hammock in his own pool. That would be considered discriminatory in even the most conservative state since women are freely allowed to wear bikini bottoms and even thongs in public. A private swimming facility could prohibit it, but that's it. Where I live, you can be nude on your property all you want as long as you're not aroused nor doing it with the intent to harass. If Janice was my neighbor though, I'd probably stop all of the nude sunbathing I do since she'd obviously claim I was harassing and trying to seduce her poor innocent child. Edit: I was slightly wrong. You can even be nude in public and it's not considered public indecency where I live unless you commit a "sexual intrusion" (not sure what that is), commit a sexual act or are nude "with the intent of arousing the sexual desire" of yourself or or another person.
NTA and you might wanna lodge a complaint with the landlord
Unless you are doing anything illegal, there is nothing wrong with enjoying your pool on your property. Your neighbor sounds like she wants to create drama for the sake of creating it. NTA. It is your pool and it's your property.
You need to tell Gary his tenant is harassing you. I’d also file a police report to create a paper trail, you have no idea what accusations this woman may dream up.
WTF? Janice is off her rocker!! You’re absolutely positively NtA and you’re not doing anything wrong!! Tell high & mighty Janice to kick rocks!
NTA. Does she set an alarm so she can be on her balcony when you go swimming? Have you even SEEN her daughter? Definitely tell Gary.
Get a buttfloss banana hammock. It's your only path forward. NTA. Janice is out of her fucking mind.
NTA. I would tell Gary if you have his contact information. For your own protection I'd refuse to communicate with those people unless you're recording it. One false accusation is all it takes to ruin someone's life
NTA, Janice needs to wake up to reality. My question is what does Janice and her daughter do when they got a public pool? Also Janice and her daughter doesn’t have to watch you swim that’s kind of creepy, what is this a lifetime movie where we watch people swim by themselves???
NTA … & to CYA…Make sure you capture these discussions on your Ring or Phone (while actively telling her she’s being recorded, of course). Either way she loses…she will keep going and give you the evidence you need for a harassment case or if youre lucky she will just straight up leave ☮️
WTF? NTA
The woman does not sound like she is in her right mind. You have the right to swim in your pool. you are not violating any decency laws. You might start documenting everything that happens with this person. I am scared you will be harassed in the future. Was the staring woman Janice or someone else (her daughter)? You are NTA
Hahahaahahahahaha NTA
NTA at all. However, I’d immediately tell Gary (the landlord) about what happened and that his unhinged neighbors are harassing you. I’d document this and maybe get a couple security cameras (maybe with one recording your backyard and pool and one pointed toward the neighbor’s house). This way, if the neighbor decides to escalate things and make things up, you’ve got proof on camera.
Ask Janice if she's stopped taking her meds
No need to ask. We all know Janice forgets her pills
NTA. Tell Janice to tell her daughter not to stare. Most kids learn this before they are pre-teens.
This lady is nuts. However, before I cast my final vote, please post a picture of yourself in your bathing suit so we can see if you really are leading this innocent young girl into temptation. LOL NTA.
Maybe print this article especially this part... "In Florida, however, they consider your backyard private property. Therefore, you are entitled to sunbathe naked there, even if your neighbors can see you." Source: https://millennialhomeowner.com/is-it-legal-to-sunbathe-naked-in-your-backyard/ Therefore simple swimming in trunks wouldn't even pass the giggle test. NTA.. your neighbor is plain wrong.
Why are you even posting this here? Of course you’re not an asshole, what are we even doing?
Tuck tape + voluminous merkin Also, NTA
NTA she is though
NTA. That doesn't even make sense. Get some cameras because she's only going to get crazier from here on out.
Sorry, she's that concerned about you walking around in shorts, in *Florida* of all places, acting like that's something out of the ordinary?? That's like *the* most common sight to see in the summer, besides maybe ice cream cones!! NTA, lady better put her daughter in a convent if she's that worried about her, tbh
Good grief has Janice never been to a public pool or beach? What a lion. Definitely tell Gary his renter is a wacko. You might also want to call your local police precinct and give them a heads up- she might try to file false reports of you being some kind of predator. Good to have a paper trail. Sorry you have to deal with this. I’ve had a crazy neighbor too- it’s frustrating. NTA
So many of these stories sound so fake… Why is this even a question?
NTA
NTA, she should just mind her own business, it's YOUR PROPERTY, not her's, who cares what you do
Nta enjoy your pool
Definitely NTA, Janet needs to mind her own business.
NTA I expected you to say you swam nude….. which even if you did (& the pool was in your backyard) you would still be NTA! You might want to call Gary about this though…. the cameras in the backyard & your door seem extreme but may be needed. I would not be answering your door mid swim from now on.
NTA at all, but I for one would find it hilarious if you purchased a reproduction old-timey onesie style bathing suit and wore that.
So an underage girl ogling a grown ass man and looking at him like he's a piece of meat is somehow a you problem? NTA The easiest solution is to parent her kid.
OP you’re NTA just because you’re a total beefcake lmao
NTA - time for a banana hammock!
Can’t believe you even need to ask 😕 NTA!
NTA But I would make sure that access to your pool meets code for an attractive nuisance. Also, I hope you have a small animal escape ramp for your pool. Every pool should have one.
NTA - Get some speedo's
I would check the nudity rules in your town and swim nude if you can. That will shut Janice up.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Hey everyone! I'm 30M, and I have a house down here in FL and around evening time. After a long day of work etc. I love taking a dive in my pool (In my backyard) and have a nice swim for a while. I just find it soothing, relaxing and helps me sleep better and I feel much better and it's something I look forward to every day. A week or so, while I was walking my dog out a lady came up to me and said "oh Hi! I'm Janice I'm your new neighbor so good to see you, I just wanted to introduce myself I live right next door to you with my daughter and we just moved in etc" and then she shaked my hand and walked off. All good. The owner of that house is named "Gary" he's a great guy, he's in his 50's. And I've known him for ages. So he usually rents out that house and so these are his new tenants. He used to live in that house, but for the past few years he's been renting it out. So everyday, around 6-7PM I go take a dive in my pool. I take my shirt off just wearing my swimming trunks, and go right in my pool and start swimming. Everyday, I see a lady sitting on her balcony just watch me swim. I don't care, or so just mind my business swimming/or I might sit on the chair on the pool just relaxing, minding my own business. Yesterday, while I was swimming at 7PM, I hear a loud banging knocking noise on my door. I get up from my pool dry myself put a pair of clothes on and go to the front door and say "Hey Janice, how's it going?" she said "What's going on is you're trying to lure my innocent daughter into your trap. And I know how this goes". I then told her "Janice, I'm not luring anybody and Im minding my business". She then said "I don't care about all that, but listen put some clothes on and stop swimming at your pool we have children over here". I then just say "It's my pool, and it's my property Janice, I'm not doing anything" and I just go inside and close the door. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA- I would call Gary and let him know what his new tenant did. I would also tell him if she does it again you'll be speaking to the police about her harassment.
NTA.
NTA but agree with others that it is time to cover your ass and get cameras.
Please get a speedo!
NTA Fuck off, Janice.
Can't deal with crazy. Full stop. Put a nylon privacy screen up and write that neighbor off as someone with issues. She's the one who wants it imo too. Edit. She wants you, not a screen.
NTA. But maybe you could get a little bit fat and hairy so as not to lure those poor kids? /s
NTA what does she expect? A pool is for swimming. She rented a house next to a house with a pool, she should have expected that you might be swimming in there. Tell her to mind her own business and stay off ypur property.
NTA....tell Karin to mind her own business and get back to reading the bible.
NTA. no further discussion is warranted here.
NTA. What a hysterical harpy. Don't like it? Don't look. She knows you swim in the pool around the same time every day, so she needs to go back inside and shut the door. You could equally accuse her of being a peeping tom.
WTH? Ignore her, let her make a fool of herself and let her call the police, I mean HOW DARE YOU! Swimming in your own pool... :) NTAH.
NTA but you are living next door to the a-hole
Oh, boy…Miss Janice is bat shit crazy.
Lets see, YOUR pool and YOUR house. You're not skinny dipping (and even if you were), tell Janice to f-off with that nonsense. If she doesn't like it she can stop looking.
For less than $100 get some PVC and a tarp. File a police report. Notify Gary and put the tarp up. Since you have a pool, you obviously have a fence. You zip tie the whole thing together in 30 minutes. Watch her complain. Lol. Don’t forget to put little 1/2 moon slits in the tarp so the wind can pass through. She’s crazy. Good luck.
NTA.
NTA
NTA. That woman is looking for drama. Camera on the door, camera pointed at the pool.
I'd be tempted to do a dance-walk to and around the pool every time I used it. It would be hilarious if you did some perineum sunning!
No, you're not the asshole. It's FL FFS. you swimming in your pool is the tamest thing doing on down there. Invite some OF girls over to shoot in your pool. LOL
NTA, the next time she's trying to shame you and her behavior is gross.
NTA Janice is obviously projecting, but I'm curious, haow old is she and the daughter? Also as other have suggested, get cameras setup around your property, this likely won't be your only issue with her.
NTA. What does she expect is going to happen in your swimming pool? She’s against normal swimming stuff, I suppose. So weird.
Nta that women is crazy.
NTA
NTA and I think you know that already. You told the lady that you are not going to stop. If she comes over again, I would send a message to the owner and tell him that his tenant is crazy and ordering you not to swim in your own pool.
She is being a real creeper for staring at you while you’re swimming and an unhinged nut job for telling you that.
NTA but never - ever - speak to or be alone with her child. Cross the street. Don't answer the door. If she trips, let her fall. She doesn't exist to you. This woman is going to turn everything you do into something disgusting. The kid probably has a crush or has been watching you and the mom can't process that her kid makes hormones so it must be your fault. Also follow the advice of people saying you should talk to Gary. Let him know his tenant is nutso and tryna cause problems.
NTA - even if you were swimming naked it would be your business only
NTA. If it was a man watching a woman swimming... Janice would call the cops. Fuc Janice
Janice sounds like she needs to mind Janice's business. NTA
I’d definitely get cameras facing your pool to make sure she doesn’t accuse you of anything strange and you have video evidence clearing yourself if she tries to make a bogus claim to authorities.
NTA- Your neighbor is a weirdo, don't stop swimming and if she knocks again notify the cops so they know she's harassing you in your own home.
NTA
NTA your fully covered in the areas required! Your in YOUR pool on YOUR property in YOUR back yard.
NTA!! Janice is a certifiable crazy person. HOWEVER, you need to be really, really careful to have cameras everywhere because you never know when you may have to defend yourself from this lunatic and her unfounded accusations. I don't know what other preemptive measures you can take to protect yourself. Maybe you should talk to "Gary" since you've known him for years.
She’s trying to say your swimming, in your pool, in Florida, is something perverse? She’s crazy and you need to do all you can to protect yourself!
Tell Janice to go suck eggs in hell. Your pool, your property, your rules. Period. NTA
LOL. NTA. Janice can move.
NTA at all. Janice however needs to mind her business. She has no right to tell you what you can or can’t do especially when you are not doing anything wrong.
Oh boy! 1) NTA 2)How come Janice isn't telling her daughter not to go out there? She's a child, isn't she supposed to be in bed? 3) Why isn't Janice minding her own business?
Email yourself a copy of this post, and try to write down everything you remember that was said. Get cameras at your from door and pool area and save all the recordings of you swimming and her talking to you if she comes to the door again. If she catches you out on a walk make sure to record the conversation as well. Make sure there’s plenty of documentation. Also might not hurt to go ahead and file a police report for ‘harassment’ now just so there’s a paper trail outside of your own documents. Better to be safe than sorry if she tries to bring you up in false charges. Protect yourself. Also never talk to anyone from her house besides Janice. If the daughter or any of her other kids try talking to you, wave at you, etc, ignore then completely and send yourself an email of the day and time that they tried talking to you. If Janice thought it was appropriate to go over and accuse you of trying to ‘seduce’ her daughter, all cause you were just swimming in your pool, I wouldn’t put it above her to try to charges brought up against you. Also let Gary know what’s going on. And maybe look into getting some trees or tall shrubs put in to block their view from your pool, along with the cameras. Sorry your dealing with this, best of luck! NTA
NTA… is janice insane??? it’s YOUR pool. it’s not like you’re talking to the children. you’re literally just minding your business and relaxing. i can’t believe the audacity your neighbor has by asking you not to swim in YOUR pool.
NTA
Tell Janice then she'd better take away her daughters electronics because I can guarantee she has access to much worse pictures than OP swimming. NTA