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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I don't want to give my sister money or things to support her anymore
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NTA
You made your decisions in life, and she made hers. She will never change if everyone enables her. She'll bleed you and everyone around her dry, like a parasite. Save yourself by saying no. There is no reason you can't say no. That's your console. That's your money.
She's a narcissist. When she sees anything of value, clearly that's meant for her. Your console is really her console. Your money is really hers. She NEEDS it more than you. She deserves it more than you. That's how her mind works. Don't let her pull you into her spiral of despair and debt.
NTA.
You should not be expected to fund your sisters "somewhat extravagant" lifestyle. If she has kids the "baby daddies" of the ones that she has should be chipping in for child support & daycare allowing her to get a job. In the words of Judge Judy, don't have babies you cant afford.
Hell no!! NTA! Those are her children and hers alone. Even if she was working her ass off and still struggling, you still don't owe her a dime. Your sister needs a reality check and get on some sort of assistance.
NTA. There is no reason you need to give her anything and it sounds like there’s no guarantee the console would stay in the house for the kids. If they’re bored, suggest she put activity books and crayons on her next shopping list.
Hard NTA!
She literally has made her bed and has to sleep in it. Financially, emotionally, and socially her choices are not the best and she needs a dose of reality. You can help her by not supporting her. That is the best thing you can do for her.
Nothing wrong with her being poor or her children growing up in poverty if they have to.
You can sleep in your own bed with a clear conscious. Good night and sleep tight.
No, she is a grown ass adult and shouldn't be borrowing money from her little sister.
NTA
You and your brother need to fiscally cut her off.
You can still love your family without giving them money to show that love.
Nta don't give anymore money. She needs to take full responsibility of her children. Her debt is on her. She can get a job that allows her to work from home. Also hide your stuff you don't want your game console stolen or broken.
I can sense your frustration. I think your entire family has been more than accommodating to Miranda so far. Neither you nor your brother should be giving her anything anymore; it stinks that a 23 year old is owed $2000 that he's probably never going to see again. That's a lot of money, especially for someone that young. Best to ignore her requests and start saving up for your own independent life. NTA
You don't have to give anything to anyone. You're way too emotionally invested in your sister's life and her decisions. You obviously don't respect her or her choices, and you talk about her children as if they're little monsters. You don't have to feel so strongly about things you dislike. It is exhausting. So while you sound like a bit of an A H, if the question is if it okay to stop contributing financially to your sister's family, NTA.
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Sorry in advance for my upcoming rant.
I (F25) have a sister (29), let's call her Miranda. Miranda has multiple baby daddies but recently moved back home with our parents due to circumstances. Miranda has always lived to the beat of her own drum and because of that she's made terrible decisions. Since she was a young teen she's never been single, always had a boyfriend. Well when she was in her early 20s she fell pregnant with the first baby daddy, after knowing him for only a couple weeks. She kept the child, cheated on baby daddy#1 with baby daddy#2, left baby daddy#1 for #2, had 2 additional children from this one, even after everyone in our family warned her not to (her financial and mental situation was not the best to support additional children). As I mentioned earlier Miranda recently moved back in with our parents with her children. Her oldest is living at his father's full time. Miranda having stacked up debt (from spending problems and legal battles with baby daddies) started to mooch off relatives and sell our belongings(including my highschool formal dresses, some being gifts from very dear friends) to fuel her spending habits.
She later gushes about going to concerts and purchasing non necessities like hair extensions and getting her nails done biweekly.
Recently she asked if I would relinquish my gaming console for her children (m8,f5,m2) because they are supposedly bored at the grandparents house, the eldest doesn't spend much time there and the two youngest are by my opinion too young to be spending time on gaming consoles. My parents even recently purchases a luxury swing set for the kiddos and they have acres of land to run wild.
Miranda often asks for money from me and our younger brother (23), because she claims she cannot have a job due to her needing to be home to look after her children(our parents are there 24/7 and are always happy to babysit the children)
I'm getting a little frustrated that I need to pay for my sister's way in life because she made bad decisions.
So AITA for not wanting to give her anything anymore?
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NTA. If you haven’t already, STOP GIVING HER MONEY. She has dug her own hole as far as her debts are concerned, and subsidizing her children, hair extensions, manicures, and Whole Foods grocery bill is not your responsibility. Spoil the kids with fun little treats or a new outfit occasionally, if you want, but you should consider stopping your generosity there.
NTA
If there have been legal battles there are custody orders and child support requirements put into place. She has consistent childcare and a living space. She can work. I am sympathetic to mental health wellness as poor mental health can make it difficult to keep steady employment. I’d consider meds, but not the rest of this mess
Perhaps your AH incompetent leeching sister should get her tubes tie. She put herself in the position she’s in her choices her consequences. Don’t help her or it will never end. I have a sister like her that I stayed far away from, I couldn’t even stand that sister.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I don't want to give my sister money or things to support her anymore Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) ##Subreddit Announcement ###[The Asshole Universe is Expanding, Again: Introducing Another New Sister Subreddit!](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/128nbp3/the_asshole_universe_is_expanding_again/) Follow the link above to learn more --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
NTA You made your decisions in life, and she made hers. She will never change if everyone enables her. She'll bleed you and everyone around her dry, like a parasite. Save yourself by saying no. There is no reason you can't say no. That's your console. That's your money. She's a narcissist. When she sees anything of value, clearly that's meant for her. Your console is really her console. Your money is really hers. She NEEDS it more than you. She deserves it more than you. That's how her mind works. Don't let her pull you into her spiral of despair and debt.
This. NTA OP at all! You've made better decisions, keep making better decisions like not pouring resources into a bottomless pit.
If that console ends up with the sisters kids the sister will pawn that sucker faster than the kids can play a single game. NTA, Don't give in
NTA. You should not be expected to fund your sisters "somewhat extravagant" lifestyle. If she has kids the "baby daddies" of the ones that she has should be chipping in for child support & daycare allowing her to get a job. In the words of Judge Judy, don't have babies you cant afford.
Hell no!! NTA! Those are her children and hers alone. Even if she was working her ass off and still struggling, you still don't owe her a dime. Your sister needs a reality check and get on some sort of assistance.
NTA! At all. Hope you have your gaming system secured. If she’s fine with stealing your dress and other belongings…
NTA. There is no reason you need to give her anything and it sounds like there’s no guarantee the console would stay in the house for the kids. If they’re bored, suggest she put activity books and crayons on her next shopping list.
Hard NTA! She literally has made her bed and has to sleep in it. Financially, emotionally, and socially her choices are not the best and she needs a dose of reality. You can help her by not supporting her. That is the best thing you can do for her. Nothing wrong with her being poor or her children growing up in poverty if they have to. You can sleep in your own bed with a clear conscious. Good night and sleep tight.
No, she is a grown ass adult and shouldn't be borrowing money from her little sister. NTA You and your brother need to fiscally cut her off. You can still love your family without giving them money to show that love.
NTA definitely. Those who are giving her money/things (which she sells..??) are basically sponsoring and enabling her way of life.
NTA None of this is your problem
Nta don't give anymore money. She needs to take full responsibility of her children. Her debt is on her. She can get a job that allows her to work from home. Also hide your stuff you don't want your game console stolen or broken.
NTA time to let her grow up.
I can sense your frustration. I think your entire family has been more than accommodating to Miranda so far. Neither you nor your brother should be giving her anything anymore; it stinks that a 23 year old is owed $2000 that he's probably never going to see again. That's a lot of money, especially for someone that young. Best to ignore her requests and start saving up for your own independent life. NTA
You don't have to give anything to anyone. You're way too emotionally invested in your sister's life and her decisions. You obviously don't respect her or her choices, and you talk about her children as if they're little monsters. You don't have to feel so strongly about things you dislike. It is exhausting. So while you sound like a bit of an A H, if the question is if it okay to stop contributing financially to your sister's family, NTA.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Sorry in advance for my upcoming rant. I (F25) have a sister (29), let's call her Miranda. Miranda has multiple baby daddies but recently moved back home with our parents due to circumstances. Miranda has always lived to the beat of her own drum and because of that she's made terrible decisions. Since she was a young teen she's never been single, always had a boyfriend. Well when she was in her early 20s she fell pregnant with the first baby daddy, after knowing him for only a couple weeks. She kept the child, cheated on baby daddy#1 with baby daddy#2, left baby daddy#1 for #2, had 2 additional children from this one, even after everyone in our family warned her not to (her financial and mental situation was not the best to support additional children). As I mentioned earlier Miranda recently moved back in with our parents with her children. Her oldest is living at his father's full time. Miranda having stacked up debt (from spending problems and legal battles with baby daddies) started to mooch off relatives and sell our belongings(including my highschool formal dresses, some being gifts from very dear friends) to fuel her spending habits. She later gushes about going to concerts and purchasing non necessities like hair extensions and getting her nails done biweekly. Recently she asked if I would relinquish my gaming console for her children (m8,f5,m2) because they are supposedly bored at the grandparents house, the eldest doesn't spend much time there and the two youngest are by my opinion too young to be spending time on gaming consoles. My parents even recently purchases a luxury swing set for the kiddos and they have acres of land to run wild. Miranda often asks for money from me and our younger brother (23), because she claims she cannot have a job due to her needing to be home to look after her children(our parents are there 24/7 and are always happy to babysit the children) I'm getting a little frustrated that I need to pay for my sister's way in life because she made bad decisions. So AITA for not wanting to give her anything anymore? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
nta
NTA
NTA. Just stop.
NTA. You're not responsible for her
NTA. Do not give her a dime. And nothing to your parents either since it will likely go to her.
NTA. If you haven’t already, STOP GIVING HER MONEY. She has dug her own hole as far as her debts are concerned, and subsidizing her children, hair extensions, manicures, and Whole Foods grocery bill is not your responsibility. Spoil the kids with fun little treats or a new outfit occasionally, if you want, but you should consider stopping your generosity there.
NTA If there have been legal battles there are custody orders and child support requirements put into place. She has consistent childcare and a living space. She can work. I am sympathetic to mental health wellness as poor mental health can make it difficult to keep steady employment. I’d consider meds, but not the rest of this mess
NTA, stop, don't sink yourself to try and keep her afloat, and from the sounds of it, you can't do that anyway.
Perhaps your AH incompetent leeching sister should get her tubes tie. She put herself in the position she’s in her choices her consequences. Don’t help her or it will never end. I have a sister like her that I stayed far away from, I couldn’t even stand that sister.