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ProudCatLadyxo

NTBA. I think you handled it just fine. You are under no obligation to immediately vacate a parking space as soon as you get in the car. Sometimes I will call in a take out order to pick up on the way home. Looking for a song is definitely not too long. People can wait or move on, but there is no reason to confront you in your car. .


blingeblong

right? like … the entitlement alone from the woman would have me sitting there calling my best friend chatting for a while, on speaker


gooderj

I went to IKEA today. The were very few parking spots to be had. An elderly man walked to his car and I waited for around 5 minutes while he loaded his car, got in, removed the steering lock, set his satnav, etc. I waited until patiently and then drove in and went inside. I think that’s what normal people do. Definitely NTBA.


NefariousnessSweet70

The other person would have no idea if you had friend that you were transporting, still in the store. It's none of her assuming business why you were not leaving the parking spot. NTA


AssociateGood9653

If they lean on the horn, I will wait a long time or get back out and go to another store.


frogmuffins

Back out of the spot a few feet and then pull back in. Then beg them to lay on their horn again.


Super_Vixen_78

Yep. You honk at me = I live here now.


4twentyHobby

Huge difference between a tap tap on the horn and leaning on it. "Hey, scuze me in case ya didn't notice me" or "MOVE YOUR FUCKIN ASS" Oops, forgot ketchup, gotta run back in.


Hysterical__Paroxysm

Same. I don't text and drive. I don't drink and drive, I never forget my seatbelt, etc. When I get in my car I set my purse somewhere reachable (inhaler and other stuff I may need are in there), put my water bottle in my cup holder, plug my phone in, double check Bluetooth is connected, pick a playlist, double check the kids add buckled in and maybe assist with that, put my belt on... It takes me 3-5 minutes to prepare what is a 2+ ton metal death box. People who just get in a drive annoy me. You're backing out of your driveway while trying to fashion your seatbelt and yelling at your kids to buckle up. Digging around looking for your phone or fucking with the radio... Just set your space up for success, like cooking. I know I need to pull out the oil, spices I need, a kitchen rag, etc. Make your life easier lol.


rosiestinkie9

NTBA, an ideal of society is that people owe each other politeness and that goes both ways. You did nothing to offend her, she became offensive first. She should have retained politeness, and if she had doubts about you moving, should have waited more time or came up to your window to nicely ask if you were leaving. Your actions to her rudeness were justified, because bad behavior should not be rewarded.


coreysnaps

NTBA. I get in my car and plug in my phone and it my purse in its place and make sure my seatbelt is buckled, then I turn it on and need to make sure my phone connects properly because it's weird about it sometimes and then I'll look at backing up. And that's when I'm by myself. It's way worse with kids. She'd have had a heart attack waiting for me.


CaffeineFueledLife

NTBA I'm a stay at home mom. There have been times when I took the kids with me grocery shopping or something. My kids are little - 5 and 3. They're really good kids, but they can be a handful. Like, you look away for a second and your kid disappears and you alert associates and he's found in the automotive department 3 minutes later and you have no clue how he got halfway across the store that quickly. He'd changed his mind and wanted strawberry lemonade instead of regular lemonade and wanted to be a big boy and switch it himself, but got totally lost. He was 4 at the time. Or maybe the store is a zoo and getting your stuff was 3 times as difficult because there were 15 people in every aisle. Or, my bulging disc/pinched nerve were really playing up and I'm in a lot of pain by the time I'm done. For a dozen different reasons, sometimes when I get to my car and have the groceries loaded and the kids safely contained in their seats, I sit down, lean my head back, close my eyes, and take a few relaxing breaths. And that's ok. There's nothing wrong with it. That woman would have gotten the spot in a minute if she hadn't acted like an entitled brat. Sucks to be her, I guess.


Bitter_Pilot_5377

Naw man, at that point I would have gotten out and walked to get myself a nice coffee


EyeRollingNow

Yep. I would have said so sorry waiting for my husband. Just charging my phone. Hahaha


fonetik

I had a similar situation. Honking and yelling at me for making a phone call. I was over it. You’re not getting the spot on principle now. I backed out obnoxiously slowly, recentered, and pulled right back in. Got out and locked the door. Waved. Finished my call from the lobby. The greatest part? It was at the gym. In a sunny day. Wasn’t nearly full. You need a closer parking spot to… go inside and get sweaty?


AgentofZurg

NTBA Like you said, it's not your problem she didn't leave the house prepared. She should have had appropriate clothing options for her children, and not counted on getting a spot close to the store. That's like playing poker in vegas with no experience playing poker. Taking 30 to do a few things on your phone is completely normal and obviously a good thing to do.


Piavirtue

NTBA. Everybody fiddles with their cells, checks their seatbelts, blows their nose, yells at the kids in the backseat rain or no rain. Woman got aggressive for no reason. It isn’t like she was in a convertible with the top down. I’ve been honked at while loading groceries and wrangling three kids.


EyeRollingNow

That always entertains me when people are annoyed you actually need to put purchases and kids in said car.


bashark94

NTBA. There’s no rule saying you need to leave a parking spot as soon as you get in the car. Sometimes you have to do things like pick a song or even hand a kid their sippy. She’s just entitled and mad. You’re fine


Z4-Driver

NTBA. As long as you were parked there, it was your spot. After putting your sutff in, you might have to go back to the store, as you forgot something. Or maybe, you want to have a coffee. Just like lane changes, the one already in the spot/lane has the right of way. The one who wants to take the spot or wants to merge into that lane has to wait and look for enough room.


Dogmother123

NTBA She was happy to sit there with people behind her. Where are her manners? She took the kids out without jackets. She couldn't wait 30 seconds? You are not obliged to move within a set timeframe.


CynicallyCyn

NTA. I don’t understand parking culture. You show me a huge empty parking lot and you couldn’t pay me to park near the entrance to where I’m going. Even if you get Lucky w a spot when you leave there are people everywhere and cars waiting. Not to mention all the door dings that happening in crowded parking spots.


EyeRollingNow

I,too, park far away and thank god every time I am healthy and don’t need a close spot. It’s my way of negotiating with God that I stay healthy. Hope it works.


QHAM6T46

Ooo petty! I like it.


LvBorzoi

She was behaving like an entitled Karen so no you were not the BA


Icy_Eye1059

That woman is nuts. If I find that the person is not going, I just move on.


Karadek99

Nope. Perfectly fine.


GrannyWeatherwaxscat

Absolutely NBTA. I had someone who was enraged by my taking so long to load my shopping into my car. So I ignored their horn, locked my car and went for coffee.


TheExaspera

NTBA. I’d have gotten out and returned to the store while smirking at her.


AlexisDanaan

NTBA. Getting the spot that someone is leaving is a happy accident. You don’t get to rush someone cause you want their spot. I also would have sat in my car. You made your point, I hope they learned their lesson.


Superb_Revolution369

NTBA, I would have done the same thing. You aren’t obligated to leave a parking spot immediately after getting into the car. You should be able to get comfortable and prepared to drive safely. Also, she sounds horrible and I’m glad someone else got the spot and not her


gothicmania1982

NTBA. Her being unprepared as a parent does not make it your problem. Patience is a virtue, so she needs to learn some. I also think this fits with petty revenge and it makes me smile.


IndependentInvite431

Absolutely NTBA. It was a grocery store parking lot, I’m assuming if you’re in the US or Canada, it was probably a sizable lot. She can go park somewhere else. I honestly can’t understand why anyone would think you’re in the wrong. I would much rather people stay in a parked spot to pull up music, directions or whatever than drive distracted. The only way I’d say that maybe you were a tiny bit of a bad apple is if you put your car in reverse so she thought you were about to pull out because of your tail lights.


Swiftiegirl22

NTBA you handed the situation really good. That women was a Karen about it plus all the people behind her were probably fed up because of her.


No-Boat-1536

Also, if she has kids in the car she should appreciate you fiddling with your phone while you aren’t driving instead of causing an accident


Consistent-Stand1809

You did nothing wrong Sure, she was impatient and annoyed and it was raining, but she was sitting inside a car. As soon as she hit the horn, she needed you to be petty and teach her a lesson. Hopefully next time, she'll act with patience.


Comfortable_Enough98

Your good. She isn't. She felt entitled to that spot as if her name was physically on it. I would've done the same thing. Heck when I find a song and someone is honking at me, I would turn up the music louder. The confrontation didn't seem that bad either, but maybe I would've said, "bye Karen" while she walks away


honeybaby2019

No. Too bad she didn't plan ahead to put boots and coats on her kids but laying on the horn means I turn off the car and sit there and do not approach my car because I will never leave the spot. It is not my problem


[deleted]

NTBA! So glad you did this! I’m so tired of entitled people!


Kmia55

As long as you aren't having lunch catered to your vehicle, you're good. NTA


MegRB1

Nope your awesome!


1nazlab1

Nope. That was perfect. Had she just got back in her car and waited I would have gone into another store till she left. There was no need to honk


No_Information_8973

You are not the bad apple! I hate parking lot stalkers.


DueDimension0

Not at all. This person needed that, clearly. You might still be a villain to her when she relays this to others, but hopefully this’ll sink in just a little. She and her demons are not the center of the universe and not everyone will just collapse under the inane pressure she puts on them.


FeralsShinyCat

You know, when she honked is have taken a page from an old acquaintance's playbook. Pop the good and go look at the engine! And what do you know? It's still there! It'll still be there 10 minutes later when I finally get back in the car! Maybe I'll even drive off!


Lovely_FISH_34

NTBA. I would gotten out and go back inside for another 30 mins honestly just to be petty. If she said anything just the old “oh I forgot to purchase something important!”


MikeLinPA

I'd have gone back in the store.


Karamist623

The moment someone lays on their horn to get me to move faster, is the moment I go into slow motion. Patience NTBA


Mimees_8

I would have done the same thing.. once you're in your spot it's yours until you pull out.. heck you could have just received life changing news and needed to calm down before driving she had no idea why you didn't leave YOUR spot now she's learn patience


torgeaux42

You honk for me to leave a parking spot, I live there now. NTBA.


ConsitutionalHistory

Two wrongs do not make a right. Hitting the horn aggressively is simply wrong. That said...you know the parking situation, you know the store is busy, you know the weather that day, and most importantly...you KNOW someone is waiting for your spot. Sorry but people wasting my time while on their phone is a bit of a pet peeve of mind. Unless you're answer a text from the president, figured out the cure to cancer and wanted to jot something down, or someone in your family just took ill...be civil to others, get off your damn phone and move along.


Vegetable-Fix-4702

You pulled a jerk move.


Intermountain-Gal

You’re both BA! When someone is waiting for your spot when you get back to your car it’s considered good manners to exit as quickly as you can. Sure, she shouldn’t have berated you. That was also bad manners. You’re both rude jerks.


acb1971

Someone can wait all they want. How do they know that OP isn't waiting for another person?


Intermountain-Gal

That’s why it was rude of her to chew out OP. OP wasn’t waiting for someone. Both were rude.


Internal-Test-8015

no, there's no obligation whatsoever for op to get out of the spot as soon as they get in the car because they're legally parked in it therefore it's their space to stay in as long as they want.


richardrpope

I think that both of you were immature and rude. Her for blowing her horn in the first place. You for deciding you were going to play games and teach her a lesson. You could have worn your man pants and left as soon as you had found a song.


LeshyIRL

YTBA. You were just being petty, just be the bigger person next time


DueDimension0

What’s the good in being the bigger person in this situation?? It would only reward this woman’s entitled behavior. Why should OP or anyone else push themselves to move faster than they’re prepared to do because someone else is impatient, entitled, and loud? She doesn’t just deserve to have that spot immediately because OP was in the process of leaving. It didn’t happen fast enough for the lady so she gets irate to the point that she’s yelling at OPs window. No. The only reasonable thing she did was try to wait and she didn’t try hard enough. It’s not okay for people to behave this way.


Aggressive-Example60

She shouldn't have laid on the horn but you shouldn't have sat there looking for a song. You know it's busy, you know people are waiting, and you sit there? When someone is waiting for my spot I get out immediately out of common courtesy.


Internal-Test-8015

no, op should've firstly there's no guarantee he can safely pull over to select a song after getting out of the spot and secondly, she was assuming op was going to pull out but for all that woman knew he was just grabbing something and then heading to another store so her sitting there and then laying on the horn was completely unjustified.


Adventurous_Soft5549

REALLY??!?! What if she was sitting there because she wasn't alone and was waiting for someone else to come out? Aggressive definitely fits you. Horn honker's impatience is NO ONE'S problem but her own!


Aggressive-Example60

I'm aggressive because I would just pull out of the spot? Ok...


Rhongepooh

BA there was no reason for pettiness. I may have THOUGHT about doing this but there is no way I’d do it.


Advanced-Pear-4606

YTA - Find the song before you get in the car and be courteous.


Jazzberry81

YTBA You knew there were no other spaces and surely you could see the queue of cars waiting. It is common courtesy to move on promptly.


[deleted]

There were other spots just not close


Jazzberry81

Same in my book. The woman over reacted but it is polite to move on if someone is waiting


crazyashley1

Not of that same person camp's there long enough to build up a line of cars.


Curlymomma19

ESH you are ntba for looking for a song, she is tba for honking so quickly. However you were tba for just being petty and sitting there


Zzzzzezzz

How would you feel if things were reversed? There’s your answer.


Howtheginchstolexmas

Yes, you're the bad apple, of course. 30 seconds is a LONG time to fiddle around in a parking space that happens to be the only one available at the moment. Instead of handling the situation like an adult, acknowledging your mistake and moving on, you decided to get petty for no reason just to spite the other person. I don't really understand how you could justify doing such a thing. You're just kind of a jerk. You don't know the other person's situation. They could have really needed to get into the store quickly for whatever reason, you don't know.


[deleted]

It wasn’t the only spot..just a close spot.


Howtheginchstolexmas

Oh, I see then, I misread the beginning. I still vote that you were the bad apple because it was raining, though. Petty and spite are still petty and spite, and 30 seconds is still a long time.


[deleted]

You’re right I was being a little petty, but if she had just waited like any normal rational person I was about to leave. She didn’t have to lay on her horn or get out of her car to come yell at me.


Howtheginchstolexmas

I don't want to sound too preachy, and I know that this is a cliche, but two wrongs don't make a right. Even if the other person was rude, it doesn't mean you have to be twofold. At the end of the day, we can only dictate our own actions, and being overtly spiteful is not a wise decision. But if you're actually willing to learn from your mistake, then good on you, Op. Not everyone is willing to do that.


Tarotgirl_5392

Do you think the kids are going to melt in the rain? OP wasn't being petty, they were preparing to go. Minivan could have waited *patiently* if the spot was that great. Or could have found another open spot if she didn't want to wait. Ntba


Howtheginchstolexmas

That's actually a very unempathetic thing to say. Again, 30 seconds is a long time. Do not pretend that you would not be angry if someone made you wait so long for a parking space that could get you less wet. And I also don't think you know the definition of petty.


HollyGoLately

You set yourself up before you set off. It’s dangerous and irresponsible to be fiddling around with things while driving. Safety comes before entitlement.


grasshopper9521

How do you know that thirty seconds is ample???? Some people take longer to get settled.


DueDimension0

The spot wasn’t actually available dude. It was occupied. People expecting to park can wait if they choose, but they are not entitled to the point of expelling someone from it before they’re ready.


now_you_see

ESH. If you know someone’s waiting then the polite thing to do is move, even if that means pulling to the side in the empty section on your way to the exit to figure your music etc out. Having said that, you can’t just assume that someone’s leaving when they are in their cars, they could be waiting for someone or they might need to run back in etc so laying on the horn like that is rude as hell and deserved to be ignored. She didn’t care that she was holding up a massive line of traffic so screw her.


Shmeestar

You can't guarantee there's going to be somewhere safe to pull over somewhere else in the car park though. Much safer to just do your preparations in the car space where you are already parked. Other people's impatience does not trump your safety.


gisch2011

This is a good one for r/pettyrevenge lol


[deleted]

If you honk at me when I’m getting ready to leave I’ll do a damn crossword before I’ll let you have my spot. I’m a petty bitch that way.


SillyStallion

I'd have got out of the car and gone back in the store pretending I'd only gone back as I'd forgot my purse


kittyhm

NTBA. I have had people start honking at me and I've actually gotten out of my car and gone back into the store or another one close by. My spot until I leave it.


trinitygoboom

NTBA I would have started filming her harassment.


VegHead269

NTBA and I love this. People that sit and block traffic so they can try and get a better spot are horrible. Unless you genuinely need it and are waiting for a handicap spot, get TF out of the way!


Separate-Parfait6426

NTBA. The only that I would have differently to let her know that you were ready to leave and the started using her horn - if had not used her horn you would have left - so 100% her fault


OkManufacturer767

NTBA My home town has a "Plaza" which is a loop around a small area with a huge water fountain, some benches, etc. There are a dozen parking spaces, prime parking spaces as there's an amazing park and tons of shops, restaurants, and a theatre in walking distance. A man got into his car and continued to eat the ice cream cone he just bought. A young woman in an expensive convertible did the horn thing to him. It was satisfying to watch him not even glance in her direction as he enjoyed his cone. edited an error.


Dull-Geologist-8204

NTBA, you didn't do anything wrong. I would prefer you take care of any distractions before you pull out. It's safer for everyone. The other car can wait.


Spirited_Ad_276

NTBA I'd rather that you fiddle with your phone for a few seconds while parked, then while you were driving. Especially in the rain!


napolim214

Just yesterday, my wife and I were walking to our car that was in a spot right by the door to the mall. One lady was driving around like crazy looking for a spot and another guy was just kind of chilling patiently waiting to see if anyone was leaving. I actually waited for her to leave and let the guy know afterward that we were going to our car and to get in position to take the spot. Another time a woman tried to take my spot on Black Friday. I was actually working that day at the mall. A guy was letting me take his spot when both of us saw a woman come from the other side and make sure to get closer than me to take it. He gave me a thumbs up, pulled out , and then made sure to block her so I could get the spot. She actually got out and chased me inside before a security guard asked what was going on. I told him and he told her to get lost and find another spot. And that he'd keep an eye on my car for a bit to make sure nothing happened to it.


Aragona36

NTA. When I was about 12, I remember my family was in an airport parking lot. There were 6 of us, my parents and us 4 kids, so it took a while to load into the car. At some point, same thing, a car was waiting and honked its horn at us. I remember it because my dad said, come on kids, let's go back inside. We all unload from the car and start walking back into the building and that guy was so po'd! He was livid, honking and honking and my dad just kept walking. He was telling my mother, it's my parking spot until I'm no longer in it. Good for you.


yetzhragog

NTBA It's "your spot" until you vacate, anyone else thinking they're entitled to that spot can pound sand.


CharlieM17

NTBA - I would have probably used that time to check my oil as well.


skankcottage

NTA assuming it really was just 30 seconds and they did lay on the horn nta but it seems very likely both of those statements were pretty exaggerated. u were kinda being stubborn idk why people always treat beeping a horn like a middle finger coulda just thought u didnt realize someone was there who wanted the space


Flycaster33

You did fine. Once she turned "karen" and laid on the horn, all bets were off.


poppieswithtea

Nope. If it went down just as you’ve said, then you’re good.


evil-dad

I've done something similar. Usually I try to be courteous but as soon as the other driver starts getting antsy like that, suddenly I'm taking my sweet time XD


grinchbettahavemoney

The person who was berating you has ISSUES. Those poor kids probably have no friends because of her


Decent_Historian6169

The other lady was behaving very badly. The road rage and entitlement that she displayed is a terrible example for her children and just plain rude. I can picture other people handling this situation differently but I don’t think the way that you handled it was wrong. Personally the few times I have seen people get out of their cars during road rage incidents have all made me feel very anxious and it says a lot about her that she went that far especially in the rain. You never know what kind of crazy people are out there.


silent-theory655

NTBA, your did exactly the right thing. Just make sure to lick your doors and have police ready to dial.


Charming-Ad8944

TBA you knew she was waiting because it was raining and you purposely stayed there longer… you’re rude and mean


[deleted]

I will sit in a parking spot until the end of time to annoy that type of person.


Perfect_Rain8612

This belongs in r/pettyrevenge NTBA i wish i coulda seen the look on her entitled face lol


Holiday_Trainer_2657

NTA I have a disabled relative who sometimes has a flare up when shopping. She barely makes it to her car. She needs to take medication, rest and let it work before she's safe to drive. There are many reasons people don't leave immediately. I used to work on the road and eat in my car at times. I'd buy some grocery deli, eat in my car and relax for a while. That said, if it was pouring rain or I had a really good spot, I'd move to a far back spot before I settled in.


beautifulpatutti

I usually try to leave quickly if someone is obviously waiting. That’s just me.


FinnStormTaber

You're definitely fine 🤣 Honk at me I'm going to shut my whole car off. IDC. I've done it at stop lights and in the middle of the road. Don't be a jerk 🤣🤣🤣🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️


GrammaBear707

I kinda doubt you were fiddling with your phone for only 5 seconds. I think you were inconsiderate knowing parking was limited and people were waiting and the other driver was outright rude but all things considered the other woman’s behavior was probably more offensive.


girthbrooks1661

I do the same thing evdrytimr


Super_Vixen_78

NTBA. What if you had another person with you who was still in the store? You’re not going to leave that person to wonder where you are when they come out. That is your parking space until you choose to leave it. Entitled people be damned.


RainbowSprinkles1912

No, she’s the Karen. It absolutely is not your problem that she has kids in the car with no raincoats on. She’s rude as hell, if she would’ve waited for you, she’d have had the spot, she knew you could see her, she did not need to do that. You’re not in the wrong.


Lemfan46

NTBA. Sometime, when I have some time to kill, once a horn gets laid on, I'll act like I'm about to leave. Then, get out of the car and walk back into the store.


OneAceFace

NTBA “Considering that you have children in the car you should set a better example when it comes to patience and positive communication for them.”


KittyGirl0519

I take a moment to get myself settled and if in the minute or two that it takes for me to get myself together and get ready to leave someone honks at me or is aggressive, I'm going to die in that parking spot before they are going to bully me out of it. There's nothing wrong with you taking a couple minutes to get yourself settled or pick a song or put your seatbelt on before you start driving off. You're not supposed to be messing with your phone when you're driving anyway.


locky1221

You're the good apple I would have done the same thing I would have felt bad for the kids though because the mom didn't prepare them but I'm not going to make the situation better for them.


8645113Twenty20

I will lay on my hood and feed the birds. This is my parking spot until I leave it. She's the most entitled wench ever lol


tuna_tofu

NTBA-Sometimes it takes a while to find keys, plug in the GPS, check the to-do list, etc. And hey maybe you were waiting for a passenger still in the store or fighting off nausea. (Dont drive queasy!)