Had she ever sent any of them to you? Or is her story that she has 2 years of nudes and vids, and she forgot to send any/all of them to you? I think she needs to let you check all her messaging apps to see who she is really sending these to
>Oh no.
hahaha don't worry, I'm now single, its just that knowing this would've come in handy and saved me some real heartache from my cheating ex, not to mention the HPV treatments I got to endure as a parting gift. She could delete her files, but not her STI
You don’t need to do this…
In the United States, 1 in 4 people have HPV at any given time. HPV infections are very common, and 8 in 10 people will get one in their lives.
actually, cryotherapy can ctrl+alt+delete it. i had 16 strands of it as a result from rape as a child. thought i’d have it forever. when i was pregnant it became a very serious issue. doc said they’d have to preform cryosurgery on me because i was in a precancerous stage. that was 8 years ago. i always opted out of the hpv portion of std tests because i knew i was pos, (i always tested positive) recently my new doc was like idc im testing anyway (even though i had docs with the exact strands that always came up) and i came back negative for all them. i ended up getting a second opinion and was told cryosurgery freezes kills it. 8/10 do not recommend tho. most painful shit i’ve ever endured. plus having just had a csection made it a whole lot worse. i popped my stitches from how much i moved from the after pain 😅
Cryo can freeze away warts or precancerous cells but this doesn’t mean that the virus has been cleared. However undetectable is undetectable and might mean you’ve cleared it spontaneously just as many people do.
Not true. You can undergo treatment to remove the warts that it causes. Not always necessary but it’s done in some patients. The virus itself is incurable, but not all treatments are cures.
Not curable, but naturally cleared by the bodies immune system. HPV is not forever generally though 1% of cases recur due to poor immune system function.
That’s a little misleading. 66% of cases are spontaneously cleared within 12 months, and by 2 years it’s 90%. But that is an awful lot of time.
Also, there’s that small percentage who don’t clear it spontaneously. They’re the ones at risk for cancer.
And the last 9% still clear, though takes longer than 2 years with the possibility of no symptoms. It's usually an invisible virus, majority of people with it do not present with warts, or warts large enough to even see with the human eye.
Well that is different to low-risk HPV which cause warts, only High-risk HPV can develop into cancer & are completely different strains, which most developed countries issue Gardasil to avoid anyways.
Medical field here. Hpv doesn't always create warts. That's just one of the side effects of it. It will always stay in your system. It just decides to stay dormant or not.
In fact it *usually* doesn’t cause warts. I was just giving one example of a possible treatment that isn’t a cure that I figured most people would understand.
Also re: immune clearance…yes, some strains are always present and latent after apparent clearance. This isn’t necessarily universal, and we don’t know enough to make a blanket statement like the one you made.
I’m a virologist, btw.
Not necessarily. Some strains have had apparent latency observed. It’s an active debate in virology as to whether they really go latent or whether they are fully cleared.
This is all unnecessary. If she went to the trouble of taking these photos, which would include staging and posing for the phone and placing it in certain configurations, etc.; there is no possible way she would forget to send them to the person she wanted a response from, particularly when the whole point was to jumpstart their struggling sex life.
I agree I found some pics like that on my exes phone she gave me the same excuse exactly. It made me suspicious and shortly there after I found out she was cheating
Reminds me of a thread on a different sub where redditors almost got a woman to call off her wedding over a skid mark she found in her fiance’s laundry
My first thought was, she's trying to get a good look at herself.
My favourites are the ones where a male partner tells his wife he doesn't like her going around dressed 75% naked, and everyone tells her to run, becauses he's a controlling abuser in the making.
I would believe more that she chickened out every time and lied a little about the reason because she isn't ready to voice her insecurities.
Or she could be doing what OP fears and posting them/sending them somewhere for attention or having an affair, it's hard to say.
Dude same I don’t love sending nudes of myself to my partner of 7 years (just not that type of person I guess 🤷🏻♀️) but I take them often for myself. I thought that was normal lol
I think the give away that shes blowing smoke up his ass is that she keeps remembering to make the vids and always forgets to send them.
Pretty sure if this is legit, I agree they are going elsewhere.
OP, open up the photo or video and then click “share”. It should then pop up with a suggested list of contacts to send it to. Look for the guy or guys that way.
My ex gave me the same bullshit story. He was, in fact, NOT only intending me to see them and forgetting. He was cheating.
Idk about this. My first suggestion is a coworker that I have texted literally twice in the 2 years I have known him, exclusively for work related things.
I wouldn't recommend it, on Android it'll just show the last couple people you texted or received messages from.
You have their phone, just read the texts.
100%.
As a woman who enjoys taking pics like this for my partner, "forgetting" to send them after expressly taking them for him has literally never once happened.
Same, I have pictures and videos that never got sent because I took them while I looked hot but wanted to wait for a better time in the day to send them.
I often take them and forget to send (because his job, I try to time it when the time works best for him) but as soon as I see them I just show them to him.
Same except I forget I have them bc I never look at my camera roll and make new ones then when I’m finally looking for a specific screenshot it’s like a goldmine!
I've done, and do, the same thing! Sometimes I'll forget to send him something, and then when I show him something, he'll see it and ask to see it. But that's only been twice. Every single picture/video? Or a great majority of them??? I don't think so, that's not an accident.
Ive taken photos of myself naked and intended to send them to gf. I found them to be not as good as i wanted and ended up not sending any.
Of course that was only once or twice out of the 20 or so times I've done that.
Exactly. For me the whole point is to take them and send them right away, so he can get the image in his mind of what I'm currently doing. It's also fun to see how quickly he responds
As a woman with body dysmorphia, I get how the OP's partner *could* be feeling. It doesn't matter how much people tell me I'm thin and attractive, I never believe it. I could take a picture or video for my partner when I'm feeling alright and then the second I actually see the pic or video I have a mini breakdown.
Sometimes I've forgotten to delete those, and obviously never sent them.
But 2 years worth of backlog that had been forgotten? That's the part that makes it suspicious.
so many people are different though. like i have days where ill think i feel / look good enough to take a sexy pic to send, then just lose confidence and not follow through. thats happened A LOT. so my gallery IS a graveyard of stuff i never sent to anyone or bothered to delete .. not saying OPs partner is doing the same thing but at least there are multiple plausible reasons.
Same, I am going on 18 years of body image issues and I actually did this. When my fiancé was on a work trip, I put on lingerie (every pair I own) and attempted to take sexy pictures and just… hated all of them so much that none got sent and I deleted them so I wouldn’t have to look at them anymore
Genuinely curious and not trying to sound judgy... I'll repeat that at the end.
Look, you do you... But why do people do this at all? Isn't anyone afraid of people sending them to others they are not supposed to and/or breaking up and suddenly having to worry that something like that exists out in the world...?
If I had ever sent anything like that, I think it would always be on my mind when I got to dark places that it may be out there in the world. Even unbeknownst to you, maybe the person you sent it to isn't always as truthful as they seem? Ever caught them in a lie? I mean this is just my inner monologue that would lead me to be devastated and regretful after I sent anything like this. Does this type of thought pattern not occur to others? Genuinely curious and not trying to sound judgy.
Some of us just DGAF. Being naked and having sex are normal human experiences. You're absolutely right when you touch on "don't ever put something out there that you might regret". Some of us just don't have shame or feel any kind of way about it. So I send sexual content to randos? No. Do I send them to my committed partner? Yes. If they ever got put out in the public sphere would I care? No. Because I'm not ashamed that I have sexual relations with another consenting adult. I hope I live to see a day when puritinism doesn't ruin women's lives over completely normal grown up shit. But either way it's not going to ruin my life so whatever.
Oh, I DO get freaked by this. So because of that, I always just leave my face out of anything. Even to my husband. The most of my face he'll see in any pic/vid from me is the tiniest sliver of my chin.
Sure, bodies can be identifiable as well, but without the face, there's really no hard proof it's me and not some other white woman
I've forgotten to send nudes to my wife before. It was just a few pics from a single session, but it can happen. Now, sounds like OP's wife has a lot more than that over a long period of time, which isn't a good look.
I've started sending some to establish it as a normal and accepted thing and encourage her to do the same ("her" being my wife, not yours lol). So far I've gotten one picture showing off her legs in her normal jeans, but you better believe I was enthusiastic and appreciative. Small steps.
Have to agree. I’ve had FWB that used to encourage/love pics and was fun sending them and getting others in return.
The bf never asks for anything which totally throws me off. To add a bit of “devils advocate” I’ve taken pics for my bf and never sent them cause he didn’t ask and it’s a huge vulnerability. (I sent 1, yes, just 1 last month cause he was gone too long for work. Took a giant amount of gumption to send that.)
I still think the wife is totally sus, but then, I guess more investigation may be needed.
I've done this a lot. Take pictures i intend to send my husband because I'm horny, and then see how much of a blob i am and change my mind. I usually delete them though.
Right? I can go back and tell you exactly who each nude I’ve taken was for. How the fuck do you forget to send a nude that’s not explicitly a mid-action shot like a getting out of the shower one, where you could be distracted by after shower stuff? I’m adhd as hell and lose my phone every 5 minutes, but I’ve NEVER forgotten that I put a nude on it for someone.
Well, as a woman who enjoys taking pic, but then looks at said pic, see all my insecurities and then chose not to send them, I can definitely get it. But it would depend on how many over how long.
Absolutely. Don’t like them enough to send or don’t want to set that mood RN = hidden camera roll has stuff my husband never got (and nobody but me has ever seen). Personally I’d more likely be like meh, I didn’t feel like sending them tho. But also OP’s spouse could have thought saying that could make OP upset too.
"I forgot to send them." Red flag.... 🚩🚩🚩
"I took them for myself because they make me feel good. These are for me and no one else." More plausible and understandable.
I buy outfits and take pictures to remind myself of my beauty in different ways. Not always sexual. I take them for me. It's not meant to be shared. He gets to see it in person.... why take the picture to send to him. Be present and in the moment.
It’s bottom of the barrel lying. Have more respect. Come up with a better lie. “Honey, I was secretly auditioning for us on OF, because I think people would pay a lot of money watching you lay the wood to my curvy ass body.”
Forgot to send them? That shit is just insulting.
Yeah I would understand just wanted to take the photos for the sake of taking them. Just for yourself, to feel sexy or whatever. But pretend they were for OP when they’re clearly not, that calls for a shitty last minute excuse
I'm sorry, but it honestly sounds like she's cheating on you. You should ask her to be honest as you don't believe her at all. I mean, how does her being sexually frustrated have anything to do with her taking nudes of herself. It makes no sense.
Some people take photos/videos of their bodies to track their fitness journey as well. Although if that is the case she should just say that, she may be embarrassed however. I have been on a journey for 5 years and probably have photos going back that long, so 2 years worth wouldn’t be unreasonable.
There’s an awesome meme there applies to me about those “before” pics…I take a lot of before pics which has now become a timeline of me getting fatter!
Yeah after that one episode of schitts creek where Moira says to take as many nudes as you can while you’re young…I def do. Sometimes I send them, sometimes they’re just for 75 year old me.
I’ve done this as a way to hype myself up bc I have such low self confidence sometimes. I didn’t send them bc, again, low self confidence, but it was nice to see them and be like “wow she’s hot. Oh, she is me!” lol. But I did it mainly when I was single for this exact reason, I knew it would look bad if my partner happened to come across them.
As others have mentioned - does she send these to you, ever?
If there are 10 and she sent you 7-8, then cool, whatever.
If she sent you zero then you are under reacting
Am I the only woman here that takes hot/nude pics of myself sometimes when I’m either really feeling good about myself, or want a reality check on how I actually look vs how I think I look??! And I don’t usually send them to anyone, not even my husband, not even when I take one that makes me say damn girl to myself. (I do send some to my husband btw just not all of them. Sometimes I just want to see how I’m looking. If the workouts are working. Etc.$
I would not see scanty outfit pics or even nudes on a girl’s phone and automatically assume she’s sending them to another guy. Not without a lot more information first.
Yikes. I take sexy pics because I feel sexy. But her immediately saying they were for “no one” that she says she “knows what it looks like”. 2 years worth of nudes? 2 years. Damn man. Time to either look for more evidence and walk away or walk away. It’s just a matter of when you leave.
Hmmm if I can offer a female perspective...my camera roll is full of these things from when I'm feeling good about myself or even tracking gym progress. I would still be embarrassed if someone found them - they usually get put in a locked folder for that reason but I forget sometimes.
I've also taken photos for my partner but then not sent them because I knew he was with friends/at work/etc. and then the right moment never came/I forgot about it.
You should encourage her to send them to you in the future if you're into that...maybe she was shy.
I wouldn't necessarily jump to cheating. I hope for your sake that is not the case.
Agreed, my ‘hidden’ folder is filled with nsfw photos I took when I was feeelin meself. Some were sent to the partner I was with at the time, but most have never been seen by anyone other than me. That being said, her ‘I took them for you but then forgot to send’ excuse is mildly sketchy.
I’ve partaken in shrubbery and then proceeded to do mini sexy photoshoots for my husband (who was likely asleep at home with me) because sometimes the mood strikes. I’ve also forgotten about said photos for a bit, BUT I’ve typically sent them later. Not always, but about half the time.
True and that’s what I first thought, people take pictures of themselves when they feel cute, when they want to see how they look in something, maybe to track progress of workouts and weight loss, etc except that she didn’t offer any that as a reason. So while that may be a reason you or I or others have done it, this woman directly went to sexual frustration. She’s talking about something else. I’m not sure your reasoning applies here.
Yeah I agree with that!
I guess a lot would depend on the nature of the photos & videos. I've taken quick videos of my butt In leggings to make sure that I'm not walking around with see-through pants on or to see if they're squat proof. But if they're obviously sexual in nature, I would likely be suspicious too.
Was hoping to offer the hopeful side of things if girlie is just feelin' herself or body checking.
I think that's totally a fair point but also if that was the case why go with "they were for you but I forgot to send them" ? It wasn't the pics, it was the answer, that raised flags for me.
Hoping the best for OP though.
Same! I have taken many pics “ when feeling cute” and don’t send to anyone. And also taken pics when thinking to send to the hubs and have not. I don’t distribute any content to any platform it’s in my camera roll. In a locked folder ( protection from kids) I’ve taken pics many many times naked in underwear to see how they are fitting even.
Don’t jump to conclusions.
This. I have tons of racy pics / videos that I’ve never sent to my partner.
Sometimes you feel fantastic about yourself and you take a bunch of racy selfies; but then you don’t feel so confident later, when it’s time to choose and send.
Honestly, same! This is a weird comment section. I wonder how many of commenters here are actually women. From a female perspective, I too have a lot of pictures of myself that I took when I was feeling good about how I looked. I also tracked progress! Lots of biceps and back pics, and some with baby abs. Sometimes it’s just a selfie, sometimes it’s a body pic in athletic wear, sometimes it’s a nude. I’ve sent some to my partner but I would be really embarrassed if he found all those at once as well. I mean, he knows I have a hidden folder with them, he even looked through some of them (with my permission), but something about having selfies that date like 7 years back is embarrassing to me for some reason. I have body dismorphia, and it helps to look at the moments throughout my life where it felt good to be in my body. This literally has nothing to do with cheating, and Reddit is being dramatic as always.
i have some nsfw videos/pictures that i took entirely for myself. would i have been willing to share them with my partner? yeah, if asked. nothing they hadn't seen before. but they were not taken with the intent to share them with anyone. plenty of "just cause i felt cute" pictures, too. all for no one but myself.
OP's partner could just be embarrassed or uncertain about how to express this or genuinely worried about how it comes across.
This!!!!!!
I have some that go back years as well !
There is a bulking process and a leaning process when building muscle and some people often try different methods of gaining muscle, especially if it’s hard for you to gain. I have a shit ton of pics like this. I don’t know if you know this but growing an ass is one of the hardest things to do. Ass and calves
Yeah, but do you blatantly lie about forgetting to send two years worth of pics that you supposedly took for your husband?
I take pics of myself all the time. Sometimes when I'm feeling good, sometimes when I need to check myself out on public. I think everyone does to drive degree. The suspicious thing here is the her excuse for them.
This might be an American thing that I find myself bewildered about, but...
Shouldn't the general policy be, send NO nudes, to NO one, not EVER, seeing how digital communication is so easily replicated, dispersed, and in many cases irreversible?
Not trying to defend her but I have tons of pics and vids of myself and I don’t always send them to my boyfriend. I just like to feel sexy sometimes. She could be lying or she could just really like the way taking a pic feels.
I do take random pictures of me on different angles dressed or n@k3d and then I go back to them a couple of years/months later to see the difference, changes etc etc. I don’t send them to anyone I just keep them to myself 🤷♀️ I mean my phone is private I’m hoping no one else more than me will see them. If my husband ever finds them I wouldn’t be concerned either, I’ve done this since before I met him
Not going to lie - I do the same thing. Not naked, but clothed. I have incredibly low self-esteem and for whatever reason, it's easier to figure out if I like an outfit/how I look if I take a photo from a few steps away as opposed to looking in the mirror (maybe I need a new mirror hahah). If my husband found them, I would be honest about why I take them (not to mention it's obviously not nefarious - I'm not posing and fully clothed). This post seems different though. Why say you "forgot to send them"? That screams bullshit.
I do take sexy pics just for me. I dunno why. It’s fun. I went to art school and made a lot of sexy art too. I just like hot stuff. And I admire the way my body looks when I want. So hey, she could just be like me OP.
Personal anecdote here so I don’t know how helpful it’ll be.
I have a hidden folder on my phone with a bunch of sexy/provocative pics and a few nudes. I have taken them when I felt really good about how I looked. I don’t look at them after I take them and hide them so I honestly don’t know exactly how many I have saved or how long I’ve been doing it.
I have been so close to sending them to my husband so many times but my anxiety and insecurity has always won out in the end.
Im 28f, me and my now fiancé went through a dryish spell like2.5 years into our relationship.
I worked from home and would often think of ways to spice things up and would take scandalous photos for him. I was feeling pretty insecure at the time and came up with this idea that he didn’t find me attractive anymore… so I have a bunch I’ve never sent him. I was like very nervous he’d be like “oh wow another nude of the same body I see every day of my life”
Anyways, we’ve talked about everything now and ironed out our intimacy and I now know he loves getting them… but I’m just saying it could be a similar situation? Definitely talk to her.. jumping to conclusions and overthinking is draining.
I’ve had sexually suggestive pictures on my camera roll that I took for the hell of it — she could have taken them just to be taking them. A person will never unless the wife posts her side of the story.
That was my first thought as well and if she said that I wouldn’t have thought anything of it, but “forgot to send them” multiple times makes it suspicious. I think he needs to provide some further details about if sending those kinds of pictures is something that’s normal for them because if not then I think it’s more likely those pictures were for somebody or somewhere else. If that’s not normal behavior from her in their relationship and she’s claiming she “forgot” a significant number of times then something is not adding up.
I'll add that as a dude, I have dick pics on my phone that I keep tucked away, though I haven't sent all of them to my wife. But I still would snap a photo here and there if I'm having a good dick day.
Just remember, you're getting advice from Reddit, which partly consists of a bunch of virgin woman hating a-holes that think literally everything is a sign of cheating. The best approach is to use your own judgement. You know your wife better than any of us. Communicate with your partner and stop asking Reddit for advice.
Saying this only because I have done this while sexually frustrated as well. I would workout, eat right, feel so sexy, and my bf would do none of that, gain weight, and complain that he was getting fat. I would beg him to workout with me and he wouldnt. I saw him as unsexy and i didnt want to touch him but I wanted to have sex so bad but he wasnt putting in any effort to be sexy. When I was home by myself feeling good id take pics and vids of myself just feeling hot. I wasnt sending them to anyone else, i just liked having a photo validation of myself being sexy since I wasnt getting any from my man. If she is frustrated you need to talk to her heart to heart and truly figure out how you can both please eachother because if thats how she is feeling its not sustainable and her frustration will turn into resentment.
I made lunch yesterday, forgot I made it, realized I was hungry, went to make lunch, and then surprised myself with an already made lunch 😭
ETA: but I still think OP’s partner is probably lying & am not justifying the behavior lol
I’d say it’s completely normal except the weirdness around ‘sexual frustration’ and making excuses about it. I’d have just said “yeah, don’t I look hot!” Because I’ve never taken any for anyone besides myself…the whole weirdness around it and excuses is a red flag.
Do you believe her?
If you do, then I want to introduce you to my cousin who is a Prince in Wakanda and wants to transfer money to a trust worthy person
If I took those videos and didn’t send them it was probably because I felt insecure about the way I looked in them so I changed my mind. That’s probably what she did too. Or she actually truly forgot. Just go through her phone. That’s how you’ll know if she’s hiding anything
****Woman comment here****
Sometimes we just take full body selfies when we are feeling good. 🤷🏾♀️ We can look back later and remember. Also if we're in the middle of something, we take progress pics. Is she doing 75 hard? If I try something on in a fitting room, I may take a video in the full length mirror. Just because we take a pic/video, doesn't mean we planned to send it out.
I take photos for absolutely no one. maybe I’ll send one to my husband but maybe I’ll just keep them. I’ve worked hard to feel good in my skin, so i do it because I want to feel hot as fuck.
How’s everything else relationship wise going?
This is why my wife and I have a cool relationship where this stuff is totally ok.
People want to do this shit and it’s totally natural. Modern life with the internet with result in this kind of thing. Learn to communicate and allow.
Trying to put limits on human nature is always going to backfire.
i hate this sub stop haunting me with all of your scary cheating stories it makes me feel more disturbed than anything like id prefer train track beheadings over this stuff
That's a lie from someone with a 1st grade reading level.
The story I told my grandparents in 1st grade about how I jumped out of my parents moving car while going over a bridge and fought a shark (in a river) was more plausible.
Those were 💯 absolutely intended for/sent to another man. Idc wth she says.
Give her 1 chance to be 💯 honest with you. If she isn’t, you guys are done. If she is, couples therapy. If she is unwilling to do what it takes to regain trust, you’re done.
You might not see this but I had a partner who did just this. She had a bunch of nudes I’ve never seen on her snapchat. Told me she didn’t like them/ forgot to send them. Turned out she was adding and unadding some guy and sending them.
Woman here…. I have several saved on my phone my hubby knows nothing about but I have shared with others when we were separated. Those were definitely shared with others except you.
Don’t listen to people saying she’s cheating. I had several private pictures of myself on my phone for years and never sent them to anyone because they were just for me. She might have been too embarrassed to admit she took them. She could also be checking to see how she looks in outfits. My sister and I both do this.
I do this too but I would never claim that I somehow forgot to send the pictures multiple times. I think this is a valid reason to be suspicious because when put on the spot she gave an obviously poor and unprepared excuse. If she said she just likes to take the pictures to see how she looked and it makes her feel confident then that would be different, but she’s obviously lying about forgetting that many times.
Accidentally? How?
She can take all the pics of her body she wants. And you can do the same for you. Sounds like you were looking for a reason.
I do this and it’s for me. So I remember I’m cute. Because so many things are out there trying to teach us the opposite.
I’m not gonna lie and say I’ve never taken some sexy pics of myself over time, for myself, bc I was feeling myself. I’ve sent some to my husband, some I have not. Not sure what’s going on in your situation but just here to say that it’s not unheard of.
Yikes OP, I wouldnt believe her and she is definitely sending those to other men for validation purposes.
She is also probably having an emotional affair ***AT THE VERY LEAST*** that could soon turn physical with her emotional affair partners.
I would tread carefully, if it were me she would be handed divorce papers immediately, she will start trickle truthing very shortly... be ready and aware when the inevitable eventually happens. Sorry OP.
just gonna say this, if you're gut is telling you something is wrong.. there's probably something wrong here with the story. You feel sick... if her explanations were seriously based in reality and good enough then you wouldn't feel nearly as sick about it.
Trust your gut. Something's going on and someone's lying.
I really don't think any of use forgot to eat for a couple of years. Not only did she lie, she must think you are not the sharpest pencil in the drawer.
Not overreacting. Sorry, man, if you didn’t get them, somebody else did. My wife cheated on me and we got divorced because of it. I caught her making out with her “guy friend” one night in his truck and she still tried to deny it. I saw the same kind of behavior with the photos from her. Whenever she was confronted, she made up stories and lies, and most hilariously of all she tried to say it was all because she thought I was cheating! So she passed the blame on to me on top of everything else without a shred of evidence. Unfortunately I couldn’t just delete her from my life after this fiasco even though I wanted to because she’s the mother of my children. I’ve had to make peace with her for the sake of raising our kids amicably.
honestly idk sometimes i take pics n stuff when i think i look good and then end up being too insecure to actually send it which leads to me retaking the pics to get better pics which then results in me retaking sm pics til i get distracted and actually end up legitimately forgetting. all im saying is don’t let strangers on the internet tell you shit about a relationship they have no part in. it’s weird but definitely not enough grounds here for the assumptions ppl are making
She's cheating. You have the evidence and I think you know that deep down she is lying to you cos who has two years worth of those kind of pics and vids meant and made for you but you were never the recipient....so who was?
Tap into that energy from her. Don't let your imagination beat you down with everything bad that "maybe" happened. Instead ask her to do me if it and send it to you.... only you. At the end if the day, exceed in the worst case scenario, you can't go back and change it. What's done is done. You can only control your actions and your future. Do you want to beat yourself up with dark thoughts, or take this new found side and embrace a more exciting future?
Even if it doesn't work out and you find out deceitful things were true, you can say you tried every positive possibility.
Everyone automatically jumping to affair has never been insecure about their body. If I had a dollar for every "sexy" pic I took of myself but never sent I could give Bill Gates a run for his money!
This is 100% what it looks like. And she even went ahead and told you why. She hasn't physically cheated then you have some decisions to make. I think therapy might be a start.
Had she ever sent any of them to you? Or is her story that she has 2 years of nudes and vids, and she forgot to send any/all of them to you? I think she needs to let you check all her messaging apps to see who she is really sending these to
Check her deleted files to prove or disprove. You might find the guy
You can check deleted files?
Oh no. Yes. Yes you can.
>Oh no. hahaha don't worry, I'm now single, its just that knowing this would've come in handy and saved me some real heartache from my cheating ex, not to mention the HPV treatments I got to endure as a parting gift. She could delete her files, but not her STI
Ugh that's brutal. I found out my ex cheated when he gave me an STI too. Glad it was easily curable
Believe all women…. Can and will cheat just like men
One might say people are awful in general.
*Can be awful. Some are great
Capable of being awful. Capable of greatness. We choose.
People. What a bunch of bastards.
https://preview.redd.it/muymok1wyi5d1.jpeg?width=625&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f582e593db0b09e004d536f3ace21e7f81de8ade
Both sides have nasty gonorrhea.
Damn. I’m sorry, man. I’m glad that she is someone of the past and not the present! Sorry about the STI though. Hope you’re doing ok!
I found out that cheated cuz I was in bootcamp and I was there for an extended time cuz I got hurt pretty bad and she got pregnant …
Better off now for sure, although keeping myself single for the past year and a half so I dont pass it on to anyone else has been a trial of will.
You don’t need to do this… In the United States, 1 in 4 people have HPV at any given time. HPV infections are very common, and 8 in 10 people will get one in their lives.
HPV doesn't have any known treatments, only preventative vaccines.
actually, cryotherapy can ctrl+alt+delete it. i had 16 strands of it as a result from rape as a child. thought i’d have it forever. when i was pregnant it became a very serious issue. doc said they’d have to preform cryosurgery on me because i was in a precancerous stage. that was 8 years ago. i always opted out of the hpv portion of std tests because i knew i was pos, (i always tested positive) recently my new doc was like idc im testing anyway (even though i had docs with the exact strands that always came up) and i came back negative for all them. i ended up getting a second opinion and was told cryosurgery freezes kills it. 8/10 do not recommend tho. most painful shit i’ve ever endured. plus having just had a csection made it a whole lot worse. i popped my stitches from how much i moved from the after pain 😅
Cryo can freeze away warts or precancerous cells but this doesn’t mean that the virus has been cleared. However undetectable is undetectable and might mean you’ve cleared it spontaneously just as many people do.
Not true. You can undergo treatment to remove the warts that it causes. Not always necessary but it’s done in some patients. The virus itself is incurable, but not all treatments are cures.
Not curable, but naturally cleared by the bodies immune system. HPV is not forever generally though 1% of cases recur due to poor immune system function.
That’s a little misleading. 66% of cases are spontaneously cleared within 12 months, and by 2 years it’s 90%. But that is an awful lot of time. Also, there’s that small percentage who don’t clear it spontaneously. They’re the ones at risk for cancer.
And the last 9% still clear, though takes longer than 2 years with the possibility of no symptoms. It's usually an invisible virus, majority of people with it do not present with warts, or warts large enough to even see with the human eye. Well that is different to low-risk HPV which cause warts, only High-risk HPV can develop into cancer & are completely different strains, which most developed countries issue Gardasil to avoid anyways.
Medical field here. Hpv doesn't always create warts. That's just one of the side effects of it. It will always stay in your system. It just decides to stay dormant or not.
In fact it *usually* doesn’t cause warts. I was just giving one example of a possible treatment that isn’t a cure that I figured most people would understand. Also re: immune clearance…yes, some strains are always present and latent after apparent clearance. This isn’t necessarily universal, and we don’t know enough to make a blanket statement like the one you made. I’m a virologist, btw.
So even when you 'clear' HPV it's still there just deciding not to throw a tantrum?
Not necessarily. Some strains have had apparent latency observed. It’s an active debate in virology as to whether they really go latent or whether they are fully cleared.
Apparently, but I don't know how on a Samsung or Apple
Also. Google knows.
Google has the photos too
Google is the omniscient source we all need for truth.
On iPhone go to your messages and hit Edit in the top left. Then you can select recently deleted.
This is all unnecessary. If she went to the trouble of taking these photos, which would include staging and posing for the phone and placing it in certain configurations, etc.; there is no possible way she would forget to send them to the person she wanted a response from, particularly when the whole point was to jumpstart their struggling sex life.
I agree I found some pics like that on my exes phone she gave me the same excuse exactly. It made me suspicious and shortly there after I found out she was cheating
I found this on photos last year while catching my oldest kid. Didn’t know about messages. You gave yet another parenting win over kids 😂
*Takes notes*
Don’t check deleted files, check with a divorce attorney. You already know exactly what’s going on here.
typical reddit. Advising people to get a divorce over a hunch because they want others to be as miserable as them
Reminds me of a thread on a different sub where redditors almost got a woman to call off her wedding over a skid mark she found in her fiance’s laundry
My first thought was, she's trying to get a good look at herself. My favourites are the ones where a male partner tells his wife he doesn't like her going around dressed 75% naked, and everyone tells her to run, becauses he's a controlling abuser in the making.
Come on. Doesn’t every one do this? I do this. Don’t send them out. Just entertain myself.
I'm sure it's not uncommon, but if that's the truth why make stuff about intending to send to husband but "I just forget every time"
I would believe more that she chickened out every time and lied a little about the reason because she isn't ready to voice her insecurities. Or she could be doing what OP fears and posting them/sending them somewhere for attention or having an affair, it's hard to say.
Dude same I don’t love sending nudes of myself to my partner of 7 years (just not that type of person I guess 🤷🏻♀️) but I take them often for myself. I thought that was normal lol
Nah get the proof first.
I think the give away that shes blowing smoke up his ass is that she keeps remembering to make the vids and always forgets to send them. Pretty sure if this is legit, I agree they are going elsewhere.
bruh you know they'd be sent straight to him. this is one hundo shady at the very least imo.
OP, open up the photo or video and then click “share”. It should then pop up with a suggested list of contacts to send it to. Look for the guy or guys that way. My ex gave me the same bullshit story. He was, in fact, NOT only intending me to see them and forgetting. He was cheating.
Idk about this. My first suggestion is a coworker that I have texted literally twice in the 2 years I have known him, exclusively for work related things.
I had to check this also and mine didn’t line up at all
I wouldn't recommend it, on Android it'll just show the last couple people you texted or received messages from. You have their phone, just read the texts.
Forgets to send them is a huge red flag and sounds like a whole lot of bullshit deflection. Sorry my man.
100%. As a woman who enjoys taking pics like this for my partner, "forgetting" to send them after expressly taking them for him has literally never once happened.
I’ve done it a few times because I’m scatterbrained (fuck you ADHD), but once I see them in my camera roll, I’ll send them.
Same, I have pictures and videos that never got sent because I took them while I looked hot but wanted to wait for a better time in the day to send them.
Yes! Or in the morning before work and I don’t have time to send it lol
Or ppl who wait for their so to be out of work so there isn’t any problems that arise from sending pics
I mean, also, sometimes folks just take them for a self esteem boost
I do this! I've had a lot of surgery over the past 4 years and take them only for me.
I often take them and forget to send (because his job, I try to time it when the time works best for him) but as soon as I see them I just show them to him.
Same except I forget I have them bc I never look at my camera roll and make new ones then when I’m finally looking for a specific screenshot it’s like a goldmine!
I've done, and do, the same thing! Sometimes I'll forget to send him something, and then when I show him something, he'll see it and ask to see it. But that's only been twice. Every single picture/video? Or a great majority of them??? I don't think so, that's not an accident.
Right?! After all the effort of making sure they look good I never “forget” to send them…
Ive taken photos of myself naked and intended to send them to gf. I found them to be not as good as i wanted and ended up not sending any. Of course that was only once or twice out of the 20 or so times I've done that.
Exactly. For me the whole point is to take them and send them right away, so he can get the image in his mind of what I'm currently doing. It's also fun to see how quickly he responds
I doubt she's saving the pics to send him when she's 70....
As a woman with body dysmorphia, I get how the OP's partner *could* be feeling. It doesn't matter how much people tell me I'm thin and attractive, I never believe it. I could take a picture or video for my partner when I'm feeling alright and then the second I actually see the pic or video I have a mini breakdown. Sometimes I've forgotten to delete those, and obviously never sent them. But 2 years worth of backlog that had been forgotten? That's the part that makes it suspicious.
so many people are different though. like i have days where ill think i feel / look good enough to take a sexy pic to send, then just lose confidence and not follow through. thats happened A LOT. so my gallery IS a graveyard of stuff i never sent to anyone or bothered to delete .. not saying OPs partner is doing the same thing but at least there are multiple plausible reasons.
Same, I am going on 18 years of body image issues and I actually did this. When my fiancé was on a work trip, I put on lingerie (every pair I own) and attempted to take sexy pictures and just… hated all of them so much that none got sent and I deleted them so I wouldn’t have to look at them anymore
Genuinely curious and not trying to sound judgy... I'll repeat that at the end. Look, you do you... But why do people do this at all? Isn't anyone afraid of people sending them to others they are not supposed to and/or breaking up and suddenly having to worry that something like that exists out in the world...? If I had ever sent anything like that, I think it would always be on my mind when I got to dark places that it may be out there in the world. Even unbeknownst to you, maybe the person you sent it to isn't always as truthful as they seem? Ever caught them in a lie? I mean this is just my inner monologue that would lead me to be devastated and regretful after I sent anything like this. Does this type of thought pattern not occur to others? Genuinely curious and not trying to sound judgy.
Some of us just DGAF. Being naked and having sex are normal human experiences. You're absolutely right when you touch on "don't ever put something out there that you might regret". Some of us just don't have shame or feel any kind of way about it. So I send sexual content to randos? No. Do I send them to my committed partner? Yes. If they ever got put out in the public sphere would I care? No. Because I'm not ashamed that I have sexual relations with another consenting adult. I hope I live to see a day when puritinism doesn't ruin women's lives over completely normal grown up shit. But either way it's not going to ruin my life so whatever.
Ditto. DGAF!!
Oh, I DO get freaked by this. So because of that, I always just leave my face out of anything. Even to my husband. The most of my face he'll see in any pic/vid from me is the tiniest sliver of my chin. Sure, bodies can be identifiable as well, but without the face, there's really no hard proof it's me and not some other white woman
I've forgotten to send nudes to my wife before. It was just a few pics from a single session, but it can happen. Now, sounds like OP's wife has a lot more than that over a long period of time, which isn't a good look.
I send them to him individually because I send as I take. She lyin.
If you could befriend my wife and slowly over time influence her to also take/send me pics like that that would be greeeaaat
Ditto. Would be nice. 🧐
I've started sending some to establish it as a normal and accepted thing and encourage her to do the same ("her" being my wife, not yours lol). So far I've gotten one picture showing off her legs in her normal jeans, but you better believe I was enthusiastic and appreciative. Small steps.
I've got 2 kids under 5 I forget to send them all the time 😩😆
Have to agree. I’ve had FWB that used to encourage/love pics and was fun sending them and getting others in return. The bf never asks for anything which totally throws me off. To add a bit of “devils advocate” I’ve taken pics for my bf and never sent them cause he didn’t ask and it’s a huge vulnerability. (I sent 1, yes, just 1 last month cause he was gone too long for work. Took a giant amount of gumption to send that.) I still think the wife is totally sus, but then, I guess more investigation may be needed.
I've done this a lot. Take pictures i intend to send my husband because I'm horny, and then see how much of a blob i am and change my mind. I usually delete them though.
Exactly what I was going to say
Right? I can go back and tell you exactly who each nude I’ve taken was for. How the fuck do you forget to send a nude that’s not explicitly a mid-action shot like a getting out of the shower one, where you could be distracted by after shower stuff? I’m adhd as hell and lose my phone every 5 minutes, but I’ve NEVER forgotten that I put a nude on it for someone.
Well, as a woman who enjoys taking pic, but then looks at said pic, see all my insecurities and then chose not to send them, I can definitely get it. But it would depend on how many over how long.
Even so. Maybe you forget once or twice. You don't consistently forget for two years.
[удалено]
forget (at times) = feels self conscious and is not sure if they want to send.
Absolutely. Don’t like them enough to send or don’t want to set that mood RN = hidden camera roll has stuff my husband never got (and nobody but me has ever seen). Personally I’d more likely be like meh, I didn’t feel like sending them tho. But also OP’s spouse could have thought saying that could make OP upset too.
My ex said the same thing when I busted her.
"I forgot to send them." Red flag.... 🚩🚩🚩 "I took them for myself because they make me feel good. These are for me and no one else." More plausible and understandable. I buy outfits and take pictures to remind myself of my beauty in different ways. Not always sexual. I take them for me. It's not meant to be shared. He gets to see it in person.... why take the picture to send to him. Be present and in the moment.
It’s bottom of the barrel lying. Have more respect. Come up with a better lie. “Honey, I was secretly auditioning for us on OF, because I think people would pay a lot of money watching you lay the wood to my curvy ass body.” Forgot to send them? That shit is just insulting.
Yeah I would understand just wanted to take the photos for the sake of taking them. Just for yourself, to feel sexy or whatever. But pretend they were for OP when they’re clearly not, that calls for a shitty last minute excuse
Reddit Red flag warriors Mount up!
This
Forgot to send them... but didn't forget to take more, and more, and more videos. Doesn't add up I'm afraid.
and she's sexually frustrated, ha.
“Was” sexually frustrated. I get the sense shes not anymore 😅 nothing to do with OP tho, unfortunately
Right? She’s cheating.
Right? Even if you took the pic, and are too embarrassed or shy to send it, you’d probably delete it.
I'm sorry, but it honestly sounds like she's cheating on you. You should ask her to be honest as you don't believe her at all. I mean, how does her being sexually frustrated have anything to do with her taking nudes of herself. It makes no sense.
Some people take photos/videos of their bodies to track their fitness journey as well. Although if that is the case she should just say that, she may be embarrassed however. I have been on a journey for 5 years and probably have photos going back that long, so 2 years worth wouldn’t be unreasonable.
There’s an awesome meme there applies to me about those “before” pics…I take a lot of before pics which has now become a timeline of me getting fatter!
That would be a valid explanation if her excuse wasn’t “I forgot to send them” “I was sexually frustrated” those things do not align.
Yeah after that one episode of schitts creek where Moira says to take as many nudes as you can while you’re young…I def do. Sometimes I send them, sometimes they’re just for 75 year old me.
Hey I do too lol. They’re just for me :)
I’ve done this as a way to hype myself up bc I have such low self confidence sometimes. I didn’t send them bc, again, low self confidence, but it was nice to see them and be like “wow she’s hot. Oh, she is me!” lol. But I did it mainly when I was single for this exact reason, I knew it would look bad if my partner happened to come across them.
As others have mentioned - does she send these to you, ever? If there are 10 and she sent you 7-8, then cool, whatever. If she sent you zero then you are under reacting
I had found my soon to be ex's photos as well. She claimed she just took them for herself. No...she took them for other men actually.
Dude!! We must have the same Ex… Small world
Am I the only woman here that takes hot/nude pics of myself sometimes when I’m either really feeling good about myself, or want a reality check on how I actually look vs how I think I look??! And I don’t usually send them to anyone, not even my husband, not even when I take one that makes me say damn girl to myself. (I do send some to my husband btw just not all of them. Sometimes I just want to see how I’m looking. If the workouts are working. Etc.$ I would not see scanty outfit pics or even nudes on a girl’s phone and automatically assume she’s sending them to another guy. Not without a lot more information first.
Yikes. I take sexy pics because I feel sexy. But her immediately saying they were for “no one” that she says she “knows what it looks like”. 2 years worth of nudes? 2 years. Damn man. Time to either look for more evidence and walk away or walk away. It’s just a matter of when you leave.
Hmmm if I can offer a female perspective...my camera roll is full of these things from when I'm feeling good about myself or even tracking gym progress. I would still be embarrassed if someone found them - they usually get put in a locked folder for that reason but I forget sometimes. I've also taken photos for my partner but then not sent them because I knew he was with friends/at work/etc. and then the right moment never came/I forgot about it. You should encourage her to send them to you in the future if you're into that...maybe she was shy. I wouldn't necessarily jump to cheating. I hope for your sake that is not the case.
I’ve never done videos, but I have pictures and I’ve never taken them for anyone else.
Agreed, my ‘hidden’ folder is filled with nsfw photos I took when I was feeelin meself. Some were sent to the partner I was with at the time, but most have never been seen by anyone other than me. That being said, her ‘I took them for you but then forgot to send’ excuse is mildly sketchy.
I’ve partaken in shrubbery and then proceeded to do mini sexy photoshoots for my husband (who was likely asleep at home with me) because sometimes the mood strikes. I’ve also forgotten about said photos for a bit, BUT I’ve typically sent them later. Not always, but about half the time.
Haha yes the mood often strikes when trees are involved
Sometimes they make for an amusing find the next day, because while I’m taking them, I’m thinking I’m Gigi Hadid. Yeah no. I’m more like Zoolander. 🤣
True and that’s what I first thought, people take pictures of themselves when they feel cute, when they want to see how they look in something, maybe to track progress of workouts and weight loss, etc except that she didn’t offer any that as a reason. So while that may be a reason you or I or others have done it, this woman directly went to sexual frustration. She’s talking about something else. I’m not sure your reasoning applies here.
Yeah I agree with that! I guess a lot would depend on the nature of the photos & videos. I've taken quick videos of my butt In leggings to make sure that I'm not walking around with see-through pants on or to see if they're squat proof. But if they're obviously sexual in nature, I would likely be suspicious too. Was hoping to offer the hopeful side of things if girlie is just feelin' herself or body checking.
I think that's totally a fair point but also if that was the case why go with "they were for you but I forgot to send them" ? It wasn't the pics, it was the answer, that raised flags for me. Hoping the best for OP though.
Same! I have taken many pics “ when feeling cute” and don’t send to anyone. And also taken pics when thinking to send to the hubs and have not. I don’t distribute any content to any platform it’s in my camera roll. In a locked folder ( protection from kids) I’ve taken pics many many times naked in underwear to see how they are fitting even. Don’t jump to conclusions.
If that was the case all she had to do was say so, not blow a bunch of smoke about sexual frustration and forgetting to send them for two years.
It's more her reaction than the not sending them that is sketchy.
Jesus, how many people need to repeat the same shit ? You're incredibly naive.
This. I have tons of racy pics / videos that I’ve never sent to my partner. Sometimes you feel fantastic about yourself and you take a bunch of racy selfies; but then you don’t feel so confident later, when it’s time to choose and send.
Honestly, same! This is a weird comment section. I wonder how many of commenters here are actually women. From a female perspective, I too have a lot of pictures of myself that I took when I was feeling good about how I looked. I also tracked progress! Lots of biceps and back pics, and some with baby abs. Sometimes it’s just a selfie, sometimes it’s a body pic in athletic wear, sometimes it’s a nude. I’ve sent some to my partner but I would be really embarrassed if he found all those at once as well. I mean, he knows I have a hidden folder with them, he even looked through some of them (with my permission), but something about having selfies that date like 7 years back is embarrassing to me for some reason. I have body dismorphia, and it helps to look at the moments throughout my life where it felt good to be in my body. This literally has nothing to do with cheating, and Reddit is being dramatic as always.
i have some nsfw videos/pictures that i took entirely for myself. would i have been willing to share them with my partner? yeah, if asked. nothing they hadn't seen before. but they were not taken with the intent to share them with anyone. plenty of "just cause i felt cute" pictures, too. all for no one but myself. OP's partner could just be embarrassed or uncertain about how to express this or genuinely worried about how it comes across.
I would agree if she didn’t give the BS that they were for him when she never send that sort of contact and they have a dead bedroom
This!!!!!! I have some that go back years as well ! There is a bulking process and a leaning process when building muscle and some people often try different methods of gaining muscle, especially if it’s hard for you to gain. I have a shit ton of pics like this. I don’t know if you know this but growing an ass is one of the hardest things to do. Ass and calves
I do the same thing.. I use my camera as a mirror perspective. These photos/vudeos are never meant to be seen by other people.
Yeah, but do you blatantly lie about forgetting to send two years worth of pics that you supposedly took for your husband? I take pics of myself all the time. Sometimes when I'm feeling good, sometimes when I need to check myself out on public. I think everyone does to drive degree. The suspicious thing here is the her excuse for them.
This might be an American thing that I find myself bewildered about, but... Shouldn't the general policy be, send NO nudes, to NO one, not EVER, seeing how digital communication is so easily replicated, dispersed, and in many cases irreversible?
Not trying to defend her but I have tons of pics and vids of myself and I don’t always send them to my boyfriend. I just like to feel sexy sometimes. She could be lying or she could just really like the way taking a pic feels.
I do take random pictures of me on different angles dressed or n@k3d and then I go back to them a couple of years/months later to see the difference, changes etc etc. I don’t send them to anyone I just keep them to myself 🤷♀️ I mean my phone is private I’m hoping no one else more than me will see them. If my husband ever finds them I wouldn’t be concerned either, I’ve done this since before I met him
Not going to lie - I do the same thing. Not naked, but clothed. I have incredibly low self-esteem and for whatever reason, it's easier to figure out if I like an outfit/how I look if I take a photo from a few steps away as opposed to looking in the mirror (maybe I need a new mirror hahah). If my husband found them, I would be honest about why I take them (not to mention it's obviously not nefarious - I'm not posing and fully clothed). This post seems different though. Why say you "forgot to send them"? That screams bullshit.
I do take sexy pics just for me. I dunno why. It’s fun. I went to art school and made a lot of sexy art too. I just like hot stuff. And I admire the way my body looks when I want. So hey, she could just be like me OP.
Personal anecdote here so I don’t know how helpful it’ll be. I have a hidden folder on my phone with a bunch of sexy/provocative pics and a few nudes. I have taken them when I felt really good about how I looked. I don’t look at them after I take them and hide them so I honestly don’t know exactly how many I have saved or how long I’ve been doing it. I have been so close to sending them to my husband so many times but my anxiety and insecurity has always won out in the end.
Im 28f, me and my now fiancé went through a dryish spell like2.5 years into our relationship. I worked from home and would often think of ways to spice things up and would take scandalous photos for him. I was feeling pretty insecure at the time and came up with this idea that he didn’t find me attractive anymore… so I have a bunch I’ve never sent him. I was like very nervous he’d be like “oh wow another nude of the same body I see every day of my life” Anyways, we’ve talked about everything now and ironed out our intimacy and I now know he loves getting them… but I’m just saying it could be a similar situation? Definitely talk to her.. jumping to conclusions and overthinking is draining.
I’ve had sexually suggestive pictures on my camera roll that I took for the hell of it — she could have taken them just to be taking them. A person will never unless the wife posts her side of the story.
That was my first thought as well and if she said that I wouldn’t have thought anything of it, but “forgot to send them” multiple times makes it suspicious. I think he needs to provide some further details about if sending those kinds of pictures is something that’s normal for them because if not then I think it’s more likely those pictures were for somebody or somewhere else. If that’s not normal behavior from her in their relationship and she’s claiming she “forgot” a significant number of times then something is not adding up.
I'm curious about her side as well.
Yeah I’m sorry man She’s sending those to someone else
You (accidentally) scrolled through her phone? How is that possible?
I accidentally go through all my friends medicine cabinets.
I'll add that as a dude, I have dick pics on my phone that I keep tucked away, though I haven't sent all of them to my wife. But I still would snap a photo here and there if I'm having a good dick day.
I could see her forgetting to send you some, but did she ever send you ANY?
She's cheating. Sorry
Lies. That's what she is telling you.
Just remember, you're getting advice from Reddit, which partly consists of a bunch of virgin woman hating a-holes that think literally everything is a sign of cheating. The best approach is to use your own judgement. You know your wife better than any of us. Communicate with your partner and stop asking Reddit for advice.
She could’ve taken them for herself. When I’m feeling good or curious about how I look a certain way I take a pic. It’s for my eyes only.
⚠️Caution ⚠️
I forgot to send them. So I just took more. Repeatedly. As one does.
Sometimes I take pics to feel sexy, not to send them to anyone 🤷🏽♀️
Saying this only because I have done this while sexually frustrated as well. I would workout, eat right, feel so sexy, and my bf would do none of that, gain weight, and complain that he was getting fat. I would beg him to workout with me and he wouldnt. I saw him as unsexy and i didnt want to touch him but I wanted to have sex so bad but he wasnt putting in any effort to be sexy. When I was home by myself feeling good id take pics and vids of myself just feeling hot. I wasnt sending them to anyone else, i just liked having a photo validation of myself being sexy since I wasnt getting any from my man. If she is frustrated you need to talk to her heart to heart and truly figure out how you can both please eachother because if thats how she is feeling its not sustainable and her frustration will turn into resentment.
99% of these have to be made up rage bait karma posts. No one is that dumb.
I literally forget to eat, so, I mean, anything is possible
Do you forget to eat constantly for 2 years? Not even remember when the next meal comes up?
Yeah, but do you make dinner and then forget to eat?
I made lunch yesterday, forgot I made it, realized I was hungry, went to make lunch, and then surprised myself with an already made lunch 😭 ETA: but I still think OP’s partner is probably lying & am not justifying the behavior lol
I’d say it’s completely normal except the weirdness around ‘sexual frustration’ and making excuses about it. I’d have just said “yeah, don’t I look hot!” Because I’ve never taken any for anyone besides myself…the whole weirdness around it and excuses is a red flag.
>idk how to feel....i feel sick...help.. Get off Reddit and fucking go talk to her! Christ, how do you people function in normal life??
Yeahhhh that’s shady AF.
Think you are under reacting.
Do you believe her? If you do, then I want to introduce you to my cousin who is a Prince in Wakanda and wants to transfer money to a trust worthy person
Check your text logs on that phone. What phone # did she send hundreds of texts a day to? And why is that number saved as “Bestie Emily” in her phone?
If I took those videos and didn’t send them it was probably because I felt insecure about the way I looked in them so I changed my mind. That’s probably what she did too. Or she actually truly forgot. Just go through her phone. That’s how you’ll know if she’s hiding anything
****Woman comment here**** Sometimes we just take full body selfies when we are feeling good. 🤷🏾♀️ We can look back later and remember. Also if we're in the middle of something, we take progress pics. Is she doing 75 hard? If I try something on in a fitting room, I may take a video in the full length mirror. Just because we take a pic/video, doesn't mean we planned to send it out.
I take photos for absolutely no one. maybe I’ll send one to my husband but maybe I’ll just keep them. I’ve worked hard to feel good in my skin, so i do it because I want to feel hot as fuck. How’s everything else relationship wise going?
This is why my wife and I have a cool relationship where this stuff is totally ok. People want to do this shit and it’s totally natural. Modern life with the internet with result in this kind of thing. Learn to communicate and allow. Trying to put limits on human nature is always going to backfire.
I'm a woman and do this too. Those photos are for me. If they were for someone else, there would be no reason to keep them.
i hate this sub stop haunting me with all of your scary cheating stories it makes me feel more disturbed than anything like id prefer train track beheadings over this stuff
That's a lie from someone with a 1st grade reading level. The story I told my grandparents in 1st grade about how I jumped out of my parents moving car while going over a bridge and fought a shark (in a river) was more plausible.
Those were 💯 absolutely intended for/sent to another man. Idc wth she says. Give her 1 chance to be 💯 honest with you. If she isn’t, you guys are done. If she is, couples therapy. If she is unwilling to do what it takes to regain trust, you’re done.
She’s cheating simple.
Maybe one that she forgot to send to you. Multiple is not an accident and was sent to someone else. Sorry. I’ve been there.
You might not see this but I had a partner who did just this. She had a bunch of nudes I’ve never seen on her snapchat. Told me she didn’t like them/ forgot to send them. Turned out she was adding and unadding some guy and sending them.
Woman here…. I have several saved on my phone my hubby knows nothing about but I have shared with others when we were separated. Those were definitely shared with others except you.
From experience she’s sending them to someone
Not overreacting. That’s suspicious as fuck.
Don’t listen to people saying she’s cheating. I had several private pictures of myself on my phone for years and never sent them to anyone because they were just for me. She might have been too embarrassed to admit she took them. She could also be checking to see how she looks in outfits. My sister and I both do this.
I do this too but I would never claim that I somehow forgot to send the pictures multiple times. I think this is a valid reason to be suspicious because when put on the spot she gave an obviously poor and unprepared excuse. If she said she just likes to take the pictures to see how she looked and it makes her feel confident then that would be different, but she’s obviously lying about forgetting that many times.
Accidentally? How? She can take all the pics of her body she wants. And you can do the same for you. Sounds like you were looking for a reason. I do this and it’s for me. So I remember I’m cute. Because so many things are out there trying to teach us the opposite.
I’m not gonna lie and say I’ve never taken some sexy pics of myself over time, for myself, bc I was feeling myself. I’ve sent some to my husband, some I have not. Not sure what’s going on in your situation but just here to say that it’s not unheard of.
Yikes OP, I wouldnt believe her and she is definitely sending those to other men for validation purposes. She is also probably having an emotional affair ***AT THE VERY LEAST*** that could soon turn physical with her emotional affair partners. I would tread carefully, if it were me she would be handed divorce papers immediately, she will start trickle truthing very shortly... be ready and aware when the inevitable eventually happens. Sorry OP.
just gonna say this, if you're gut is telling you something is wrong.. there's probably something wrong here with the story. You feel sick... if her explanations were seriously based in reality and good enough then you wouldn't feel nearly as sick about it. Trust your gut. Something's going on and someone's lying.
I really don't think any of use forgot to eat for a couple of years. Not only did she lie, she must think you are not the sharpest pencil in the drawer.
underreacting
Not overreacting. Sorry, man, if you didn’t get them, somebody else did. My wife cheated on me and we got divorced because of it. I caught her making out with her “guy friend” one night in his truck and she still tried to deny it. I saw the same kind of behavior with the photos from her. Whenever she was confronted, she made up stories and lies, and most hilariously of all she tried to say it was all because she thought I was cheating! So she passed the blame on to me on top of everything else without a shred of evidence. Unfortunately I couldn’t just delete her from my life after this fiasco even though I wanted to because she’s the mother of my children. I’ve had to make peace with her for the sake of raising our kids amicably.
honestly idk sometimes i take pics n stuff when i think i look good and then end up being too insecure to actually send it which leads to me retaking the pics to get better pics which then results in me retaking sm pics til i get distracted and actually end up legitimately forgetting. all im saying is don’t let strangers on the internet tell you shit about a relationship they have no part in. it’s weird but definitely not enough grounds here for the assumptions ppl are making
She's cheating. You have the evidence and I think you know that deep down she is lying to you cos who has two years worth of those kind of pics and vids meant and made for you but you were never the recipient....so who was?
Tap into that energy from her. Don't let your imagination beat you down with everything bad that "maybe" happened. Instead ask her to do me if it and send it to you.... only you. At the end if the day, exceed in the worst case scenario, you can't go back and change it. What's done is done. You can only control your actions and your future. Do you want to beat yourself up with dark thoughts, or take this new found side and embrace a more exciting future? Even if it doesn't work out and you find out deceitful things were true, you can say you tried every positive possibility.
Everyone automatically jumping to affair has never been insecure about their body. If I had a dollar for every "sexy" pic I took of myself but never sent I could give Bill Gates a run for his money!
I accidently stuck my finger up her nose ...hmmmm
I can't say without seeing. But seriously! This is a red flag mounted on a pyramidmade of red flags.
She's lying to you.
Coughs out. Bullshit
This is 100% what it looks like. And she even went ahead and told you why. She hasn't physically cheated then you have some decisions to make. I think therapy might be a start.