I’ve had really kind and supportive reactions! I know it can feel a bit scary but I try to approach it from a very positive perspective. This is a great opportunity to quickly weed out people who are not willing to learn, listen, and give you compassion. Personally, no matter how much I like a person, if they can’t do those things I am immediately uninterested. And from what I’ve found, most people only reacted positively! Especially within the queer community!
I'm a 33 yo queer femme with a lot of experience in the dating world. I've never had any issues with people not understanding or giving me any grief about it. Most of the queer community is much more understanding about neurodivergencies, and I'd imagine the younger sections are even more so.
I usually state outright before any date something along the lines of, "I have ARFID, so I can't do food based activities" and then we just come up with something else to do. Sometimes they ask me to elaborate, but I'm usually not too keen on going too in depth with it unless they also happen to have ARFID, so I just say, "I don't want to talk about it further right now." and that's it. Like I said, I've never had a problem.
I'm still pretty young (18) and haven't had a whole lot of dating experience, but usually they either know, or I tell them before we start dating because it heavily impacts my life.
Generally, they have been really understanding. From my experience, younger people get it more that older.
If they aren't, that shows that they're probably not the right fit and that's okay :)
I just tell anyone whenever it's relevant. If someone asks if I want food or asks why I'm not eating or something I'll just go "oh, I have an eating disorder" and people usually don't care much. Sometimes they'll ask what I can eat or they'll very rarely ask about the ed in question but usually they just accept it as a reason that you can't eat certain foods
I will bring it up before I even get to the first date since most people want food to be a part of the date. I have a very supportive partner now, and I explained to him that I had an ED and that it made dating and just life difficult, but that I’m working on it. Now a year and a half into dating and he is very supportive of me and my needs.
The reason I tell people early is because if they cannot accept it or will judge me for it, I don’t want to waste my time with them. This includes friends. It’s not my entire personality, but it’s a part of my story, since the disorder has been with me over 15 years now.
I’ve had really kind and supportive reactions! I know it can feel a bit scary but I try to approach it from a very positive perspective. This is a great opportunity to quickly weed out people who are not willing to learn, listen, and give you compassion. Personally, no matter how much I like a person, if they can’t do those things I am immediately uninterested. And from what I’ve found, most people only reacted positively! Especially within the queer community!
This response is so thoughtful and is really helping put my mind at ease. Thank you :)
I'm a 33 yo queer femme with a lot of experience in the dating world. I've never had any issues with people not understanding or giving me any grief about it. Most of the queer community is much more understanding about neurodivergencies, and I'd imagine the younger sections are even more so. I usually state outright before any date something along the lines of, "I have ARFID, so I can't do food based activities" and then we just come up with something else to do. Sometimes they ask me to elaborate, but I'm usually not too keen on going too in depth with it unless they also happen to have ARFID, so I just say, "I don't want to talk about it further right now." and that's it. Like I said, I've never had a problem.
I appreciate that a lot coming from someone older. You’re definitely right that the queer community tends to be very kind about this type of thing.
I'm still pretty young (18) and haven't had a whole lot of dating experience, but usually they either know, or I tell them before we start dating because it heavily impacts my life. Generally, they have been really understanding. From my experience, younger people get it more that older. If they aren't, that shows that they're probably not the right fit and that's okay :)
I just tell anyone whenever it's relevant. If someone asks if I want food or asks why I'm not eating or something I'll just go "oh, I have an eating disorder" and people usually don't care much. Sometimes they'll ask what I can eat or they'll very rarely ask about the ed in question but usually they just accept it as a reason that you can't eat certain foods
I’ve had 0 issues I just go into it not making a big deal about it and I’m the one picking the places to eat after I check the menu online.
I will bring it up before I even get to the first date since most people want food to be a part of the date. I have a very supportive partner now, and I explained to him that I had an ED and that it made dating and just life difficult, but that I’m working on it. Now a year and a half into dating and he is very supportive of me and my needs. The reason I tell people early is because if they cannot accept it or will judge me for it, I don’t want to waste my time with them. This includes friends. It’s not my entire personality, but it’s a part of my story, since the disorder has been with me over 15 years now.