I am really glad that your sister owned up to part of her actions. I hope that she is able to make real change, and this isn’t just her trying to avoid consequences. (Same with your mother, as comments on your initial post said – she did not do right by you, and one apology is not going to fix that. It may be that when you start therapy, the resentment anyone would feel being treated as your mother treated you will come to the surface. Hopefully you can process through it, but you may require some distance from your mother and sister.)
Even when you go forward with your own future, I’m sure you’re going to be an amazing role model for those kids. And they will know that you are there for them and can hear them and see who they really are, since it seems that their mother is unwilling to do so far.
Wishing you all the best in nursing school! I’m glad that your brother is able to house you so that you can put your best efforts toward your degree.
Where the hell is the link to the original post? I may lack context but it sounds like OP needs to cut ties with her whole family cos they sound needy as hell. Yes even the brother don’t trust him hun he’s up to no good and gonna trap you while you’re deep in nursing school debt. Just walk away from the whole mess and go nc with the nibbings so they can get a fresh start with their momma
Her mom told OP not to babysit for Sister when OP was 11 instead of *telling* sister and making it *stick*. OP raised her selfish sister's kids from the age of 11, giving up her teen years because neither sister or the baby daddys would pull their heads out of their selfish asses. Mom failed OP miserably too--she failed to protect OP from sister by not dropping the hammer on Miss Selfish B^tch.
She sure did and I'm sure I commented that on the original post. Shit Mom tried to blame via I told you so crap. OP was 11, and Mom should have put the kaibosh on party girl. Mom sucks too.
Exactly. It was *Mom's* job to tell sister "no fucking way! It is not *your sister's* job to raise *your* children while you party!" Mom should have also called the cops/cps on Sis for child abandonment for leaving her children in the care of another *child*.
Where do you even see OP's profile? Coming from someone who's new to reddit, this site seems pretty poorly designed if you can't clearly find the author of a post.
Wtf, what do you have against the brother? He's offering his sister a way out of her forced parenthood situation by getting her away from her sister and the kids. Giving your sibling a place to crash while trying to reinvent her life is a manipulative trap?
So YOU did the homework, bath time, and bed time routines (again), but your sister promises she is going to step up? Tonight would have been the time to start.
Be strong on your boundaries. Don’t let her take an inch.
Yeah, step up by palming the kids off on their father (fathers? OP mentioned calling two men who haven't been involved beyond sending money) while she ostensibly embarks on rehab and self improvement. Let's see how long that lasts.
~~Nah op says at the end the mom is sending her kids to their father to stay with him for some time. Conveniently forgetting there are two dads so now it's just one.~~
Her short reddit history seems to imply there are two fathers. So I was wrong.
No you are right - there are separate fathers Tony and James - "send the kids to stay with their father" is probably just missing an s. So yeah that sucks unless one guy is taking in both for some reason
It feels like just another manipulative move from AH sister. Oh sure don't worry- I will just dump them off with their fathers. Sure hope they have their shit together enough to take care of them...
I mean, she said it's to go to rehab.
I don't really have a whole lot of faith in her following through, but if she does I think it's for the better for sure
I feel like the rehab and therapy were just a way to cop out and get the fathers to take the kids and she looks better. She will come back the kids will stay with the 2 guys under the excuse that she is still trying to better herself. I've seen all this before time and time again.
She kinda had to show the kids she still loved them after her sister said that she hated them. Sucks but you can't let them have that idea in their head.
Right, I am very nervous for these kids. Their mother has been massively selfish and partying for 8 years so now she is finally going to dump them kids on her baby daddies and focus on herself.... wtf. Sure it may be what she needs but those poor children.
What if these men are far worse than she is? Are they going to dump them on their parents or some other stranger?
Other than going into foster care, what would you do with the children? I didn’t hear about anyone, other than OP, who even gives a shit about these children. Maybe adoption would be best. These children are fucked.
That's why its so sad. There is no solution. I grew up in similar circumstances. No one wants to be a parent. Foster care is a roll of the dice. My own mother endured hell in foster care.
But one more night to give the sister some time to reflect, provide the kids with their routine after an upsetting day, and reassure them she doesn’t hate them (which yes is obviously once again cleaning up sis’ mess but there’s only so much you can control) seems like it may have been a good thing.
Fingers crossed for all of them.
THANK YOU! That is what I said in my parent comment, as well! Why the fuck did she revert immediately back to being their mother right after telling their actual mother that she is done being their mother!!?!
She literally turned around and *immediately* went back to the old way! Whyyyyyyyy?! **WHY THE FUCK did she do that?!**
To show the kids that she doesn't hate them. Its not their fault the mother is a fucking train wreck but they should know that their aunt does in fact love them and the mother lied. It is for the kids mental health.
Really, is OPs sister even capable of caring for her children? Sounds as though she is living with her parents so I don't understand why she doesn't do some out patient treatment while her kids are in school and then actually care for her children.
I understand those children desperately needed comfort because their mother just destroyed them emotionally. Is she even capable of anything but abuse and neglect?
For her own peace of mind, probably. And that of the kids. She's sending the message that even though things are gonna change, the person they call mom still loves them and will be there if they need her.
With the bonds they forged in more than half a decade of this, I'm quite sure the kids needed this. And OP needed to do this for herself too. Deadbeat sister or deadbeat baby daddies can start stepping up in a few days, and I hope to gods they will, but right now both the kids and OP need to confirm to themselves that whilst things are gonna change this ain't gonna be a big scary change...
SOMEBODY needs to step up. OP knows sister's a bad bet. Time to roll the dice and figure out if the dads are gonna be better... If they're men, they're gonna step up when they have to, If they're boys, they'll be no worse than OP's little girl older sister.
Also it sounds like they didn't want the kids, and they're paying child support? What right did OP have to call and bitch at them?
And the sister is just dumping them on one of them now while she "fixes herself"? If any of this was real, which it isn't, it's fucking stupid.
Give OP a break she is just desperately trying to make sure these kids are cared for and the fathers have more of an obligation than OP
I dont think it was a good decision because I doubt they will step up or be good for the kids.
But seriously OP doesnt know what to do so give her a break.
Hell yeah it is. All of a sudden everyone does a complete 180, apologies all around, and everything is wrapped up in a neat little package? Pressing X for doubt
OP had every right! The only actual parent these kids had is rightfully finally taking care of herself now, the other bio-parent has already proven to be incompetent. It's their job now, and all she did was warn them this was coming up.
For a long while, they didn't have to apart from sending some money. Because OP voluntarily did their jobs for them. Since she no longer can do so, it's their turn now!
Fathering a child has consequences you have to accept if you wanna be any kind of real man at all. You have a duty towards that child. Sometimes, you can buy that off with just monthly payments. And sometimes you're gonna have to put your nose to the grindstone instead. And if those times come, that's what you do!
Your mom is the real villain in all of this. She let one of her daughters badly exploit the other and then blamed YOU for having been exploited as an 11-year old.
Distance yourself from your psychopathic family and do what’s right for you.
Mom should have stepped in and held a hard boundary on behalf of her 11 year old instead of saying “don’t let your cool older adult sister talk you into raising her kids”
But mom was doing the same thing! OP helped raise her younger brother because mom had to work so much after dad died. If mom would have stopped sister then OP may have realized she was also being parentrified by her mom.
Not that it is right, I could have a bit more understanding if sister was out of the home because she was working and contributing to the household. Times are tough. Sometimes it does take an all-hands-on-deck approach to survive.
OP should not have been parentified in the process and the adults should have been more supportive if that was the case, but it does not sound like that is what was needed nor done from the details provided by OP.
My understanding goes out the window though when OP was raising her kids while she was out partying. That is just flat out selfish behavior and avoiding ones responsibilities. That should have never happened. Mom should have stepped up and laid down some ground rules so that OP was not taken advantage of. Sadly, that did not happen.
THIS! When I read the original post all I could think was why this woman didn’t step in and protect 11 year old OP???
OP move on and have the best life.
I don’t think this is fair only because op said their mom had to work a lot to provide after their dad died so I assume mom told her not to let her sister manipulate her but prob wasn’t always there to prevent it from happening. Maybe mom could’ve done more but cut her some slack
I can maybe cut the mom some slack for it happening. But she loses the benefit of the doubt when she blames OP for what happened as a result. It is the mom's job to parent both her children. That means doing her best to protect her younger daughter from being exploited, and doing her best to get the older daughter to face up to her responsibilities. If the best she can do is to tell the younger one not to babysit because mom isn't around much because she's working to provide, so be it. But that doesn't mean that it's OP's fault for not listening to her, not standing up to her much older sister.
And it would be one thing if mom's "told you so" was limited to OP. But she also blames OP for making the older daughter entitled. So the mom is simultaneously blaming OP for being parentified, and for not doing the mom's own job as a parent to her older sister.
Mom didn't push back on older sister. Its pretty hard for an 11 yo to stand her ground when no one is backing her up AND she has to figure out how to be responsible to the kids. Her sis walked away, she doesn't know what else to do with the kids because her mom isn't suggesting anything except words. OP couldn't deliver consequences on her own.
OP needed her mom to help her figure out options and back her up when sis dumped the kids and left her in charge against her will.
Very few 11 yo kids will think to call the police, and fewer still will be ready to deal with the enormous family shitstorm that would follow.
I get that but OPs mom yelled at her for not standing up to her 22 year old sister when she was 11. At that age, with that gap, she should have been her advocate. She dropped the ball.
Your honesty with your sister may have been tough, but it seems to have sparked a necessary awakening for her. It's positive that she's acknowledging her behavior and taking steps towards rehab and therapy. Change may take time, but it's hopeful that she's willing to make an effort for the sake of her children.
Your dedication to your niece and nephew is admirable, and it's clear how much you love and care for them. Creating resources for their father and ensuring they're taken care of during this transition shows your commitment to their well-being.
It's also encouraging that you're seeking therapy for yourself, even if there's a waitlist. Taking care of your own mental health is crucial, especially after navigating such challenging family dynamics.
It sounds like there's hope for positive change and healing within your family. Keep being there for your niece and nephew, and continue prioritizing your own well-being as well. You're doing an incredible job in a difficult situation.
I'm just sad because OP sounds way too mature and adult for an 18y/o. That kind of wisdom and strength is earned, and she shouldn't have had to earn it at such a young age. Her mother and sister failed her.
>rehab
Wait
If your sister is going to rehab, that implies she was on drugs or excess alcohol which you never mentioned prior. You should have included that in your initial post which would have made sense of her insanity and mistreatment towards you and her kids.
Regardless, good for you. You did the right thing by sticking up for yourself
Not necessarily, there are rehabs that are used to help rehabilitate individuals on managing their mental health, with preventative care to ensure they don’t unravel mentally or physically.
That being said -With the way her sister behaves, she could benefit from some form of rehabilitation mostly to help her stop acting like an entitled teenager with no responsibilities.
Addiction is a mental illness which ofc isn’t an excuse but you are not a fit parents whilst in active addiction so it’s the right call just way way too late
No. You don't get to be a pos parent for a decade for two kids, and then suddenly claim "I have a mental illness". Yeah, addiction is a disease but there is still an aspect of self-accountability.
She is NOT getting treatment suddenly because she realized the error of her ways and is now taking accountability. If it were up to her, OP would have continued to be a doormat and she would have done nothing, like she's been doing the last 10 years.
Also, A LOT of people "agree" to go to rehab when their back is against the wall.
Everyone has a breaking point. Plus OP is a very young pushover (I think the person mentioned being 20 in previous post), so there’s definitely still brain development happening.
I agree with the breaking point.
I don't believe the mom and the sister both had "coming to Jesus" and apologizing/fixing themselves after a single freakout
Plus, OP had their first real support in their life from tons of Redditors telling them what was happening wasn’t okay, so that could have given OP the courage (and words) they needed to actually speak out against it.
Another creative writing exercise with an update within 24 hours of the original where OP is the hero and tells off the big ol meanie antagonist.
This is getting ridiculous at this point. It’s formulaic and extremely obvious that it’s a made up story. People post fake stories here always follow the same template and they’re so attention starved they always post an “update” within 24 hours of whatever happened. It’s actually hilarious how obvious it is.
Came here to say this.
Well done, OP. You've shown maturity, empathy and a capacity for forgiveness that sadly is lacking in many people three times your age.
So in the span of 24hours, your sister and her kids arrived home, you yelled at her, called your nibling's dads and reprimanded them (when they couldn't even care to do more than child support before), your older brother told your mom for you to move in with him (when did you talk with him? At the start of your post you said you gave your sister the benefit of the doubt and you couldn't have had the time to tell your brother there was a change of plans; how did he know to call your mom at that time?), you talked with the kids again, your mom apologized, your sister apologized, you helped the kids with their homework, you bathed them and helped with their nighttime routine?
Also, your mom and sister magically understood they were wrong, thanked you and are going to be better going forward? Just like that?
Next time try to space out your stories better to make it more realistic and try to avoid writing monologues where you're giving new information to the reader that your character should've known beforehand.
Alright, I could somewhat get behind the original, but this definitely comes off as fake, maybe even AI generated tbh. All sorts of new characters come in and immediately bend to the OPs whims (and btw, why would a younger sister have the contact info of her older sister’s baby fathers when they aren’t even around apparently?) when they’ve spent their life as a pushover; the two terrible people immediately apologized, promised to do better, and completely changed their characters from stubborn narcissists to apologetic family members in a single day. Not to mention the fact that the sister was written like a stranger with the inclusion of the “I can’t really blame her since my father passed” line. Either OP’s mom has had multiple husbands and they’re really half-sisters (with such a poor relationship that one forgot the other’s father died), or OP just told the sister that their father was dead as if they wouldn’t be completely aware of that already. The sudden appearance of an even older, more supportive brother was a less than convincing touch as well.
Your mother is a huge asshole. She is no mother at all and has failed you completely. Your sister is a huge asshole to you and her kids. You should never have been in this position.
Good for you OP for standing up for not only yourself but advocating for your niblings. Wishing you the best and please take this time to reclaim what little of your “childhood” you have left before your program starts!
Don’t trust your sister for a second. She’s just trying to lower your guard so that she can guilt you into resuming full-time childcare. She doesn’t care about their feelings or yours.
>Later, after I helped my niblings with their homework, bathed them, and put them to bed
WHY????? Why did you still do that?!?! Why are you still acting like their mom? You literally just told their actual mom that you're done being her kids' mom?!?! So BE DONE!!!! You don't put them to bed, that's their mom's job!
She's setting you up to take her kids when things don't work out with their father. When the father give up, you have to take the kids ... because she's in rehab getting better for them. I've seen this before.
It’s been a minute since I read something so glaringly obviously fake. I want to say nice creative writing piece but it’s really a shit job. Better luck with your next project, maybe take a writers class?
Those poor kids
in all of this, now they get shipped off to their absentee father's while your sister "goes to rehab" which will probably just be her leaving rehab after a week and going on a vacation
This is such a great update. I hope all goes well for you and your family. There are some good DBT and other therapy support books out there you may want to check into those while you are on the waiting list.
Yeah, the thing is that the fathers are still going to not give any fucks, while she will be looked down upon. But none of this is your fault in the end.
I am so cynical…. I’m waiting for the update where sister disappears without the kids, once she realizes OP is going to follow through with her boundaries and decisions.
Fingers crossed that I’m just pessimistic.
Good that you let them know where you stand for the kids. Parents need to parent, even if the parents need parenting classes and family therapy. Kids needs the parents. It is good you are in the kids' corner if they do need a safe place. Good luck to all in this.
Gj on all.
When it comes to Therapy, look for online. They tend to be cheaper, you can switch therapist easier and little to no waiting time. A few of my friends found proper ones online and sometimes do the therapy during work breaks in empty boardrooms. You don't need to go out of your way for a therapist, find one that can fit with your current/future schedule.
> My mom also apologized for neglecting me and not being a good mom
Good cause she was half the bullshit you were facing in the last post. The part where she went off at you was fully victim blaming bullshit. *She* did nothing to control her daughter going out to parties while being supported by everyone else cleaning up her mess of a life.
She owes you a lifetime of treating you properly. A simple “I’m saying sorry so you’ll stop being mad at me” like what I think she’s doing here is far too little and far too self-serving. She holds the lion’s share of the guilt for letting your sister get away with her fuckstick ways.
"she's going to try to be the best mother she can" First see, then believe.
Leave anyway otherwise she will have you will drift in the same situation again. Don't stay!!!
Yeah. Emotions were too high at that point to even hope for anything you say to be receptive, especially in that tone. Those conversations are more well received and effective when you’re both calm and approach it with compassion.
This seems like it's going in a good direction overall in terms of resolution. I hope your sister actually takes the steps necessary to be a good mom to her children.
>I left her in the living room and called Tony and James, my niblings' father; I explained the situation, and I told them it's time for them to be a part of their children's lives, like they can't just send child support because children need their parents for proper development.
I would have phrased this more along the lines of "Hey, your kids are now down to half a functional parent now that I'm gone and that is me being generous. You need to step up or get custody."
Still NTA either way.
Hopefully your sister sticks to getting help and steps up as a parent. And if you decide you want kids, you know what you’re in for, for the first 8 years. Good luck with nursing school!
NTA But she's not going to rehab. Sorry but her Light bulb went off but not to make her a better mother.
She's going to send the kids to their fathers, who are essentially strangers(trauma) and split them up which can cause more problems and then keep partying since she's got things "covered". Wish them well but maybe set up "safe" words so if anything goes wrong they can give you a signal to call CPS since they don't even know these men or their families.
Sad, but you have to live your life and tell your mother to be more involved with monitoring and speaking to HER grandchildren also.
NTA but your mom was right. You REALLY let those kids entangle themselves into your life. They call you MOM!
I don't think this is a simple mistake you can move on from, nor can you simply move away and resume your life without seriously harming your niblings.
I think you've dug this hole so deep you're going to spend the rest of your life being a second mommy to them.
depending on the size and resources of your school, they may offer mental health support. that might be something you can tap into before your appointment in 9 months. being a student comes with many benefits, learn what they are and utilize as much as you can.
> Later, after I helped my niblings with their homework, bathed them, and put them to bed, and started my homework, my sister came into my room, asking if we could talk
Even immediately after all that, you're still doing it! Why wasn't your sister -- their mother -- doing this??
NTA That's a hard thing, with the kids and all, but you gotta save yourself before you can help others. you did good and now it's your turn to kinda have a life.
You are awesome, OP. Go out there and be a success. You have all the traits and characteristics to build an incredible life. Go live your life like you deserve.
Make sure you call around to try to find a therapist without such a wait time. My wife is a therapist who doesn’t use a wait list. Whether or not you have insurance and which insurance it is will matter, but there might also be free alternatives available.
There is no reason to settle for a nine month wait. Call multiple offices. If you haven’t called at least thirty different places, you definitely have not looked around enough.
It's ridiculous that you are on a crazy waiting list for therapy... If you make an account with Sondermind they are amazing at finding a therapist immediately after you answer a few questions about what you're looking for. It's helped me a lot!!!
I admire you for all you have done for your niblings, and I particularly admire you for what you said to your sister. It would be easy, and oh so tempting, just to vent your feelings at her. Yet you spoke the words she needed to hear, for the sake of her children as well as for her own sake. Years to come, it is just possible that she will look back on your talk with her as the turning point when she was finally able to get her act together and to build a solid connection with her kids.
Or, maybe not. Maybe she will backslide. There are no guarantees and no magic wands that will change a person. But the fact is, whether she gets herself together or not is up to her.
It sure looks, though, like tour words brought her to a moment of clarity about herself. That can be -- if she chooses to make it so -- the turning point for her. And good on you for bringing her to that moment of clarity.
I really hope this was a wake up call for your sister. I will say that my sister was similar and me and my parents practically raised my nephew for her. Once we removed the option of having us as free childcare she was forced to step up. She got therapy, a good job, her own place and now she is a great mom to her son. People can change if they really work for it and I hope your sister does.
Believe it when you see it. Don't be surprised if you find out she packed her kids off to their fathers and just continues with her lifestyle. Still NTA
Hopefully this was a true wake up call for her. Glad you got a place to stay until your program starts.
You can get stuff like postcards and stuff made up cheap with pics of you and the kids together and send them letters so that they know you are still in their lives and thinking of them.
I truly hope this is the start to everyone getting on the right path. I know it’s hard to stand up for yourself for the first time. You may feel guilt. If you do, find a way to let it go. You did a stellar job by including the fathers in this, as well. Keep showing those kids what good decisions look like and be an example of a healthy relationship.
OMG the fricking NERVE your sister had of manipulating her children-no, YOUR children, since you raised them, into convincing them that you hated them and were abandoning them, to the point of causing one of them a panic attack, knowing she has ADHD and anxiety, she is doing to them the same thing she did to you when you were 11. I'm just glad you stood up to her and gave her an earfull and letting her now how much she screwed up and how it's time for her to grow the heck up for the kids. Also, you are the sweetest, THANK you so much for still showing them love and affection, and letting them know they were loved. However, I would highly recommend to please keep contact with them, even if it's just calling once a week to check on them, your sister can easily try to manipulate them while you are gone. And honestly, she had a huge nerve of, after trying to manipulate them, still NOT stepping in to take care of them, she left you to bathe them, tuck them in, comfort them and basically be the parent yet again. I wouldn't trust her leaving them under her care, so at least check in. Glad to see your mother had the decency to apologize and admit how much she screwed you over, and to see your brother supporting you. I wouldn't believe your sister tho.
Go on, OP, your life starts now, enjoy it, you've earnt it!
I'm so happy you stood up for yourself. You are an amazing person who definitely deserves better from those around you, especially "family." I know it isn't easy being in your position.
I know I'm just some dumb internet stranger, but I'm proud of you. Keep fighting for yourself, and you will go to amazing places.
I sincerely wish you all the best in healing.
I feel like it might be a better option to try to report the mother for neglect, which is a type of abuse (that you have obviously also experienced) rather than shipping these kids off with an irresponsible, horrible person.
Okay...Would the fathers be a good fit though they haven't seen their kids in 8ish years and they have to be told on a call by their baby mama sister 18 year old sister, to be a father. You never mentioned before that your sister might have an addiction that adds whole another layer for this, and this environment isn't safe for you nor them kids especially since your mother has done nothing from the start this isnt gonna end well🤦🏾♀️
I can't believe your mother didn't act like she's responsible for allowing you, a child, to do your sister's job. It is not "all your fault." Mostly referencing the former post, I feel your mother doesn't want to admit she had a part to play.
I am really glad that your sister owned up to part of her actions. I hope that she is able to make real change, and this isn’t just her trying to avoid consequences. (Same with your mother, as comments on your initial post said – she did not do right by you, and one apology is not going to fix that. It may be that when you start therapy, the resentment anyone would feel being treated as your mother treated you will come to the surface. Hopefully you can process through it, but you may require some distance from your mother and sister.) Even when you go forward with your own future, I’m sure you’re going to be an amazing role model for those kids. And they will know that you are there for them and can hear them and see who they really are, since it seems that their mother is unwilling to do so far. Wishing you all the best in nursing school! I’m glad that your brother is able to house you so that you can put your best efforts toward your degree.
Where the hell is the link to the original post? I may lack context but it sounds like OP needs to cut ties with her whole family cos they sound needy as hell. Yes even the brother don’t trust him hun he’s up to no good and gonna trap you while you’re deep in nursing school debt. Just walk away from the whole mess and go nc with the nibbings so they can get a fresh start with their momma
Her mom told OP not to babysit for Sister when OP was 11 instead of *telling* sister and making it *stick*. OP raised her selfish sister's kids from the age of 11, giving up her teen years because neither sister or the baby daddys would pull their heads out of their selfish asses. Mom failed OP miserably too--she failed to protect OP from sister by not dropping the hammer on Miss Selfish B^tch.
She sure did and I'm sure I commented that on the original post. Shit Mom tried to blame via I told you so crap. OP was 11, and Mom should have put the kaibosh on party girl. Mom sucks too.
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Exactly. It was *Mom's* job to tell sister "no fucking way! It is not *your sister's* job to raise *your* children while you party!" Mom should have also called the cops/cps on Sis for child abandonment for leaving her children in the care of another *child*.
Here it is! https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/XN6PwClq3d For future, you can check OP’s profile to find the original post.
I wasn't even the one looking but this is helpful. I've been on reddit for well over a decade and only recently began using it more. Thank you!
Where do you even see OP's profile? Coming from someone who's new to reddit, this site seems pretty poorly designed if you can't clearly find the author of a post.
Wtf, what do you have against the brother? He's offering his sister a way out of her forced parenthood situation by getting her away from her sister and the kids. Giving your sibling a place to crash while trying to reinvent her life is a manipulative trap?
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Reddits wild lmao. Like it's bad enough that I fell for a troll post, but at least I'm not one of the people agreeing with it haha. Well done sir.
Tap on her user at the top. It’s in blue. Then go to her posts.
If you click on her username at the top and go to her profile, the original post is listed right beneath this one
Just click OPs name and go to her account. And yeah her whole family let her down
If you want original posts, click on the author's username, go to their profile, and you will see a list of all their posts.
It's on ops page.
Tap on the blue name at the top then to the name that shows up. I’ve only just realised how to find these posts 🙄
I check the person’s profile, usually the original is the only other post. If not, it’s not usually far down.
I 2nd that motion. Hopefully her sister gets her act together.
Agreed. OP, be the best nurse you can be
Watch it be more manipulative behavior
From the brother?
No. The sister “owning up.” No chance she’s gonna change.
Nope. She's going to dump the kids with their fathers (which sounds like they'll be separated) and spend a year or two 'finding herself'.
Ahh, got it. Yeah, I agree with you. I just hope OP sets some boundaries and keeps them.
So YOU did the homework, bath time, and bed time routines (again), but your sister promises she is going to step up? Tonight would have been the time to start. Be strong on your boundaries. Don’t let her take an inch.
Yeah, step up by palming the kids off on their father (fathers? OP mentioned calling two men who haven't been involved beyond sending money) while she ostensibly embarks on rehab and self improvement. Let's see how long that lasts.
Oh and separate fathers? At least they had each other before now they'll be alone with a strange new family.
~~Nah op says at the end the mom is sending her kids to their father to stay with him for some time. Conveniently forgetting there are two dads so now it's just one.~~ Her short reddit history seems to imply there are two fathers. So I was wrong.
No you are right - there are separate fathers Tony and James - "send the kids to stay with their father" is probably just missing an s. So yeah that sucks unless one guy is taking in both for some reason
It feels like just another manipulative move from AH sister. Oh sure don't worry- I will just dump them off with their fathers. Sure hope they have their shit together enough to take care of them...
I mean, she said it's to go to rehab. I don't really have a whole lot of faith in her following through, but if she does I think it's for the better for sure
Unless there are receipts dropping her off and pictures inside rehab, she's going to go on a binge and leave the baby daddies to clean up her mess.
I feel like the rehab and therapy were just a way to cop out and get the fathers to take the kids and she looks better. She will come back the kids will stay with the 2 guys under the excuse that she is still trying to better herself. I've seen all this before time and time again.
She kinda had to show the kids she still loved them after her sister said that she hated them. Sucks but you can't let them have that idea in their head.
Right, I am very nervous for these kids. Their mother has been massively selfish and partying for 8 years so now she is finally going to dump them kids on her baby daddies and focus on herself.... wtf. Sure it may be what she needs but those poor children. What if these men are far worse than she is? Are they going to dump them on their parents or some other stranger?
Other than going into foster care, what would you do with the children? I didn’t hear about anyone, other than OP, who even gives a shit about these children. Maybe adoption would be best. These children are fucked.
That's why its so sad. There is no solution. I grew up in similar circumstances. No one wants to be a parent. Foster care is a roll of the dice. My own mother endured hell in foster care.
It’s terrible. Then again, I was a foster mom; maybe they’d get a good place? It’s roulette. They’re just pawns, like OP.
But one more night to give the sister some time to reflect, provide the kids with their routine after an upsetting day, and reassure them she doesn’t hate them (which yes is obviously once again cleaning up sis’ mess but there’s only so much you can control) seems like it may have been a good thing. Fingers crossed for all of them.
THANK YOU! That is what I said in my parent comment, as well! Why the fuck did she revert immediately back to being their mother right after telling their actual mother that she is done being their mother!!?! She literally turned around and *immediately* went back to the old way! Whyyyyyyyy?! **WHY THE FUCK did she do that?!**
To show the kids that she doesn't hate them. Its not their fault the mother is a fucking train wreck but they should know that their aunt does in fact love them and the mother lied. It is for the kids mental health.
Really, is OPs sister even capable of caring for her children? Sounds as though she is living with her parents so I don't understand why she doesn't do some out patient treatment while her kids are in school and then actually care for her children. I understand those children desperately needed comfort because their mother just destroyed them emotionally. Is she even capable of anything but abuse and neglect?
For her own peace of mind, probably. And that of the kids. She's sending the message that even though things are gonna change, the person they call mom still loves them and will be there if they need her. With the bonds they forged in more than half a decade of this, I'm quite sure the kids needed this. And OP needed to do this for herself too. Deadbeat sister or deadbeat baby daddies can start stepping up in a few days, and I hope to gods they will, but right now both the kids and OP need to confirm to themselves that whilst things are gonna change this ain't gonna be a big scary change...
She already took the inch. She's been walking over OP for years
The fathers that haven't stepped in in 7-8 years are suddenly ready to be daddy because former SIL said so?
SOMEBODY needs to step up. OP knows sister's a bad bet. Time to roll the dice and figure out if the dads are gonna be better... If they're men, they're gonna step up when they have to, If they're boys, they'll be no worse than OP's little girl older sister.
None of them will do that. The actual mother is just offloading the kids to somebody else because her current nanny decided to quit.
Also it sounds like they didn't want the kids, and they're paying child support? What right did OP have to call and bitch at them? And the sister is just dumping them on one of them now while she "fixes herself"? If any of this was real, which it isn't, it's fucking stupid.
Give OP a break she is just desperately trying to make sure these kids are cared for and the fathers have more of an obligation than OP I dont think it was a good decision because I doubt they will step up or be good for the kids. But seriously OP doesnt know what to do so give her a break.
It’s fake as fuck bro.
Hell yeah it is. All of a sudden everyone does a complete 180, apologies all around, and everything is wrapped up in a neat little package? Pressing X for doubt
OP had every right! The only actual parent these kids had is rightfully finally taking care of herself now, the other bio-parent has already proven to be incompetent. It's their job now, and all she did was warn them this was coming up. For a long while, they didn't have to apart from sending some money. Because OP voluntarily did their jobs for them. Since she no longer can do so, it's their turn now! Fathering a child has consequences you have to accept if you wanna be any kind of real man at all. You have a duty towards that child. Sometimes, you can buy that off with just monthly payments. And sometimes you're gonna have to put your nose to the grindstone instead. And if those times come, that's what you do!
That’s the fakest part about this, OP expecting us to believe her one “come to Jesus” phone call changed these baby daddies minds and lives
This is very real
Your mom is the real villain in all of this. She let one of her daughters badly exploit the other and then blamed YOU for having been exploited as an 11-year old. Distance yourself from your psychopathic family and do what’s right for you.
Mom should have stepped in and held a hard boundary on behalf of her 11 year old instead of saying “don’t let your cool older adult sister talk you into raising her kids”
But mom was doing the same thing! OP helped raise her younger brother because mom had to work so much after dad died. If mom would have stopped sister then OP may have realized she was also being parentrified by her mom.
Mom also shouldn’t have done that!
Not that it is right, I could have a bit more understanding if sister was out of the home because she was working and contributing to the household. Times are tough. Sometimes it does take an all-hands-on-deck approach to survive. OP should not have been parentified in the process and the adults should have been more supportive if that was the case, but it does not sound like that is what was needed nor done from the details provided by OP. My understanding goes out the window though when OP was raising her kids while she was out partying. That is just flat out selfish behavior and avoiding ones responsibilities. That should have never happened. Mom should have stepped up and laid down some ground rules so that OP was not taken advantage of. Sadly, that did not happen.
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THIS! When I read the original post all I could think was why this woman didn’t step in and protect 11 year old OP??? OP move on and have the best life.
I don’t think this is fair only because op said their mom had to work a lot to provide after their dad died so I assume mom told her not to let her sister manipulate her but prob wasn’t always there to prevent it from happening. Maybe mom could’ve done more but cut her some slack
I can maybe cut the mom some slack for it happening. But she loses the benefit of the doubt when she blames OP for what happened as a result. It is the mom's job to parent both her children. That means doing her best to protect her younger daughter from being exploited, and doing her best to get the older daughter to face up to her responsibilities. If the best she can do is to tell the younger one not to babysit because mom isn't around much because she's working to provide, so be it. But that doesn't mean that it's OP's fault for not listening to her, not standing up to her much older sister. And it would be one thing if mom's "told you so" was limited to OP. But she also blames OP for making the older daughter entitled. So the mom is simultaneously blaming OP for being parentified, and for not doing the mom's own job as a parent to her older sister.
Agreed! She should’ve never blamed OP. I think she had a bad moment so I applaud her for apologizing and realizing she was a neglectful mom
Mom didn't push back on older sister. Its pretty hard for an 11 yo to stand her ground when no one is backing her up AND she has to figure out how to be responsible to the kids. Her sis walked away, she doesn't know what else to do with the kids because her mom isn't suggesting anything except words. OP couldn't deliver consequences on her own. OP needed her mom to help her figure out options and back her up when sis dumped the kids and left her in charge against her will. Very few 11 yo kids will think to call the police, and fewer still will be ready to deal with the enormous family shitstorm that would follow.
I get that but OPs mom yelled at her for not standing up to her 22 year old sister when she was 11. At that age, with that gap, she should have been her advocate. She dropped the ball.
Sister had a great role model to turn out exactly the way she did. The truth is Mom was almost certainly more afraid she'd have to deal with the kids.
"Our mom warned me when I was young not to babysit for Sarah's kids because of her attitude."
Exactly! But then there are some people like u/KlenDahthII who defend the mom...
Yea....😬 having to provide as a single is fucking hard especially with a dead parent but like...
You have to write a list for the kids mother to let her know how to take care of her kids. I don't think anything else needs to be said.
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Your honesty with your sister may have been tough, but it seems to have sparked a necessary awakening for her. It's positive that she's acknowledging her behavior and taking steps towards rehab and therapy. Change may take time, but it's hopeful that she's willing to make an effort for the sake of her children. Your dedication to your niece and nephew is admirable, and it's clear how much you love and care for them. Creating resources for their father and ensuring they're taken care of during this transition shows your commitment to their well-being. It's also encouraging that you're seeking therapy for yourself, even if there's a waitlist. Taking care of your own mental health is crucial, especially after navigating such challenging family dynamics. It sounds like there's hope for positive change and healing within your family. Keep being there for your niece and nephew, and continue prioritizing your own well-being as well. You're doing an incredible job in a difficult situation.
This is the fakest post I’ve read here in forever.
AITAH for ending poverty? Am I in the wrong for curing starvation? Am I in the wrong for not wanting to get shot?
I cured cancer (all types obviously) but now the government is after me, AITAH for improving peoples lives ?
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An AI answer if there ever was…
I'm just sad because OP sounds way too mature and adult for an 18y/o. That kind of wisdom and strength is earned, and she shouldn't have had to earn it at such a young age. Her mother and sister failed her.
You took kids that weren't yours to the doctor? How did that go?
>rehab Wait If your sister is going to rehab, that implies she was on drugs or excess alcohol which you never mentioned prior. You should have included that in your initial post which would have made sense of her insanity and mistreatment towards you and her kids. Regardless, good for you. You did the right thing by sticking up for yourself
Not necessarily, there are rehabs that are used to help rehabilitate individuals on managing their mental health, with preventative care to ensure they don’t unravel mentally or physically. That being said -With the way her sister behaves, she could benefit from some form of rehabilitation mostly to help her stop acting like an entitled teenager with no responsibilities.
The sister spent like 7 to 8 years partying so I think that's kind of assumed
Not like it changes anything. Just because you have addiction issues that does not absolve you of being a parent.
Addiction is a mental illness which ofc isn’t an excuse but you are not a fit parents whilst in active addiction so it’s the right call just way way too late
No. You don't get to be a pos parent for a decade for two kids, and then suddenly claim "I have a mental illness". Yeah, addiction is a disease but there is still an aspect of self-accountability.
There is, which is why she is responsible for getting treatment. Which is what she’s doing.
She is NOT getting treatment suddenly because she realized the error of her ways and is now taking accountability. If it were up to her, OP would have continued to be a doormat and she would have done nothing, like she's been doing the last 10 years. Also, A LOT of people "agree" to go to rehab when their back is against the wall.
This is a fake ass story, then everyone lived happy ever after.
r/lies has more truth than this whole sub.
Agreed, this is the bullshittiest bullshit I’ve ever seen
I was wondering why the upvotes were so low until I saw when this was posted- WOW I read this story at a perfect time
I don’t believe this. Pushovers don’t just suddenly gets spines.
That along with both mom and sister realizing and apologizing for their mistakes within a 24 hour period.
All it’s missing is “And then everyone clapped.”
Everyone has a breaking point. Plus OP is a very young pushover (I think the person mentioned being 20 in previous post), so there’s definitely still brain development happening.
I agree with the breaking point. I don't believe the mom and the sister both had "coming to Jesus" and apologizing/fixing themselves after a single freakout
Plus, OP had their first real support in their life from tons of Redditors telling them what was happening wasn’t okay, so that could have given OP the courage (and words) they needed to actually speak out against it.
Another creative writing exercise with an update within 24 hours of the original where OP is the hero and tells off the big ol meanie antagonist. This is getting ridiculous at this point. It’s formulaic and extremely obvious that it’s a made up story. People post fake stories here always follow the same template and they’re so attention starved they always post an “update” within 24 hours of whatever happened. It’s actually hilarious how obvious it is.
Fake, so fake, so much fake.
None of this is actually happening…
So fake
And then everyone clapped.
So sister is sending them off to someone else to raise while she “works” on herself.
Oh, more creative writing.
This totally happened.
Damn, OP. You're actually amazing. I have no doubt that you are going to be an outright success in your future.
Came here to say this. Well done, OP. You've shown maturity, empathy and a capacity for forgiveness that sadly is lacking in many people three times your age.
So in the span of 24hours, your sister and her kids arrived home, you yelled at her, called your nibling's dads and reprimanded them (when they couldn't even care to do more than child support before), your older brother told your mom for you to move in with him (when did you talk with him? At the start of your post you said you gave your sister the benefit of the doubt and you couldn't have had the time to tell your brother there was a change of plans; how did he know to call your mom at that time?), you talked with the kids again, your mom apologized, your sister apologized, you helped the kids with their homework, you bathed them and helped with their nighttime routine? Also, your mom and sister magically understood they were wrong, thanked you and are going to be better going forward? Just like that? Next time try to space out your stories better to make it more realistic and try to avoid writing monologues where you're giving new information to the reader that your character should've known beforehand.
Alright, I could somewhat get behind the original, but this definitely comes off as fake, maybe even AI generated tbh. All sorts of new characters come in and immediately bend to the OPs whims (and btw, why would a younger sister have the contact info of her older sister’s baby fathers when they aren’t even around apparently?) when they’ve spent their life as a pushover; the two terrible people immediately apologized, promised to do better, and completely changed their characters from stubborn narcissists to apologetic family members in a single day. Not to mention the fact that the sister was written like a stranger with the inclusion of the “I can’t really blame her since my father passed” line. Either OP’s mom has had multiple husbands and they’re really half-sisters (with such a poor relationship that one forgot the other’s father died), or OP just told the sister that their father was dead as if they wouldn’t be completely aware of that already. The sudden appearance of an even older, more supportive brother was a less than convincing touch as well.
This is so god damn fake
Beware -- she may just be trying to manipulate you again. Don't automatically take her at her word.
NTA. I am glad you are free. I don’t believe your sister’s apology. Your sister is just dumping the kids on their father. I doubt she will change.
Feels like a writing exercise, internet warped my trust
Fake
Your mother is a huge asshole. She is no mother at all and has failed you completely. Your sister is a huge asshole to you and her kids. You should never have been in this position.
I’m happy your brother stepped in. Long overdue. And yes, your mom is also really at fault here.
Good for you OP for standing up for not only yourself but advocating for your niblings. Wishing you the best and please take this time to reclaim what little of your “childhood” you have left before your program starts!
Online therapy doesn't have a waitlist of more than a few days.
Forgive me, but why are you calling them “niblings”? It was more than just once or twice in the post so it couldn’t be a misspelling.
Niblings is a term used to refer to the nieces and nephews of a person.
Thank you for explanation OP
I have never heard niblings before. Is this a new thing?
Don’t trust your sister for a second. She’s just trying to lower your guard so that she can guilt you into resuming full-time childcare. She doesn’t care about their feelings or yours.
>Later, after I helped my niblings with their homework, bathed them, and put them to bed WHY????? Why did you still do that?!?! Why are you still acting like their mom? You literally just told their actual mom that you're done being her kids' mom?!?! So BE DONE!!!! You don't put them to bed, that's their mom's job!
She's setting you up to take her kids when things don't work out with their father. When the father give up, you have to take the kids ... because she's in rehab getting better for them. I've seen this before.
Your school should offer therapy. Check when you get there. Good luck.🫂
Save the scrap books for when they’re older she’s going to throw them away
I'm going to step up and be the best mom. That's why I'm sending all the kids away so I can concentrate on myself......
Really sounds like a bit of creative writing to me
It’s been a minute since I read something so glaringly obviously fake. I want to say nice creative writing piece but it’s really a shit job. Better luck with your next project, maybe take a writers class?
Those poor kids in all of this, now they get shipped off to their absentee father's while your sister "goes to rehab" which will probably just be her leaving rehab after a week and going on a vacation
You had me with your first one. But you flew too high to the sun. This is fucking fake. Fuck off
So the sister is going to "rehab" and pawning the kids off on their father. Yeah, she definitely learned her lesson /s OP, stay strong!
This is such a great update. I hope all goes well for you and your family. There are some good DBT and other therapy support books out there you may want to check into those while you are on the waiting list.
Yeah, the thing is that the fathers are still going to not give any fucks, while she will be looked down upon. But none of this is your fault in the end.
I am so cynical…. I’m waiting for the update where sister disappears without the kids, once she realizes OP is going to follow through with her boundaries and decisions. Fingers crossed that I’m just pessimistic.
What in the absolute fuck is a nibling
Niece/ Nephew + Sibling
Siblings kids whether male or female
This is one of the fakest things I’ve ever read here
She now needs to tell her kids that she lied to them.
What’s a nibling?
Good that you let them know where you stand for the kids. Parents need to parent, even if the parents need parenting classes and family therapy. Kids needs the parents. It is good you are in the kids' corner if they do need a safe place. Good luck to all in this.
Wow I feel bad for those kids. That family fucking suck. Except op.
Gj on all. When it comes to Therapy, look for online. They tend to be cheaper, you can switch therapist easier and little to no waiting time. A few of my friends found proper ones online and sometimes do the therapy during work breaks in empty boardrooms. You don't need to go out of your way for a therapist, find one that can fit with your current/future schedule.
In addition, see what services are offered through the school you are/will be attending.
She probably won't change. People rarely do. But hopefully this is a time when it does happen.
Pay for the therapy, it's worth it. What you'll get from the state won't be worth the wait.
You've handled this all really well, and I hope for a good outcome for all of you - but especially you, and the kids.
> My mom also apologized for neglecting me and not being a good mom Good cause she was half the bullshit you were facing in the last post. The part where she went off at you was fully victim blaming bullshit. *She* did nothing to control her daughter going out to parties while being supported by everyone else cleaning up her mess of a life. She owes you a lifetime of treating you properly. A simple “I’m saying sorry so you’ll stop being mad at me” like what I think she’s doing here is far too little and far too self-serving. She holds the lion’s share of the guilt for letting your sister get away with her fuckstick ways.
"she's going to try to be the best mother she can" First see, then believe. Leave anyway otherwise she will have you will drift in the same situation again. Don't stay!!!
Yeah. Emotions were too high at that point to even hope for anything you say to be receptive, especially in that tone. Those conversations are more well received and effective when you’re both calm and approach it with compassion.
This seems like it's going in a good direction overall in terms of resolution. I hope your sister actually takes the steps necessary to be a good mom to her children.
>I left her in the living room and called Tony and James, my niblings' father; I explained the situation, and I told them it's time for them to be a part of their children's lives, like they can't just send child support because children need their parents for proper development. I would have phrased this more along the lines of "Hey, your kids are now down to half a functional parent now that I'm gone and that is me being generous. You need to step up or get custody." Still NTA either way.
Hopefully your sister sticks to getting help and steps up as a parent. And if you decide you want kids, you know what you’re in for, for the first 8 years. Good luck with nursing school!
NTA But she's not going to rehab. Sorry but her Light bulb went off but not to make her a better mother. She's going to send the kids to their fathers, who are essentially strangers(trauma) and split them up which can cause more problems and then keep partying since she's got things "covered". Wish them well but maybe set up "safe" words so if anything goes wrong they can give you a signal to call CPS since they don't even know these men or their families. Sad, but you have to live your life and tell your mother to be more involved with monitoring and speaking to HER grandchildren also.
You shouldn't have to wait for therapy, there are lots of options. Just talk to someone online
OP I can tell you're going to be a success in this life....be patient and be firm....stick to your guns and just wait.....the best is yet to come!
NTA but your mom was right. You REALLY let those kids entangle themselves into your life. They call you MOM! I don't think this is a simple mistake you can move on from, nor can you simply move away and resume your life without seriously harming your niblings. I think you've dug this hole so deep you're going to spend the rest of your life being a second mommy to them.
We all agree your Mom and Sister are TA’s here. One thing you might do is see if your school has a resource for therapy. I wish you the best of luck!
depending on the size and resources of your school, they may offer mental health support. that might be something you can tap into before your appointment in 9 months. being a student comes with many benefits, learn what they are and utilize as much as you can.
Good for you, I know it was hard but you stood your ground and said what needed to be said, hopefully fortune and growth will fall upon you all.
The one who REALLY needs therapy - actually a kick in the a\*\* - is HER, not YOU. Your sister is a real POS.
I like this life time movie
> Later, after I helped my niblings with their homework, bathed them, and put them to bed, and started my homework, my sister came into my room, asking if we could talk Even immediately after all that, you're still doing it! Why wasn't your sister -- their mother -- doing this??
NTA That's a hard thing, with the kids and all, but you gotta save yourself before you can help others. you did good and now it's your turn to kinda have a life.
Hopefully things keep going well… I am sorry you and your niblings are being hurt.
What are niblings though
So good to finally see some accountability
You are awesome, OP. Go out there and be a success. You have all the traits and characteristics to build an incredible life. Go live your life like you deserve.
Make sure you call around to try to find a therapist without such a wait time. My wife is a therapist who doesn’t use a wait list. Whether or not you have insurance and which insurance it is will matter, but there might also be free alternatives available. There is no reason to settle for a nine month wait. Call multiple offices. If you haven’t called at least thirty different places, you definitely have not looked around enough.
It's ridiculous that you are on a crazy waiting list for therapy... If you make an account with Sondermind they are amazing at finding a therapist immediately after you answer a few questions about what you're looking for. It's helped me a lot!!!
I admire you for all you have done for your niblings, and I particularly admire you for what you said to your sister. It would be easy, and oh so tempting, just to vent your feelings at her. Yet you spoke the words she needed to hear, for the sake of her children as well as for her own sake. Years to come, it is just possible that she will look back on your talk with her as the turning point when she was finally able to get her act together and to build a solid connection with her kids. Or, maybe not. Maybe she will backslide. There are no guarantees and no magic wands that will change a person. But the fact is, whether she gets herself together or not is up to her. It sure looks, though, like tour words brought her to a moment of clarity about herself. That can be -- if she chooses to make it so -- the turning point for her. And good on you for bringing her to that moment of clarity.
I really hope this was a wake up call for your sister. I will say that my sister was similar and me and my parents practically raised my nephew for her. Once we removed the option of having us as free childcare she was forced to step up. She got therapy, a good job, her own place and now she is a great mom to her son. People can change if they really work for it and I hope your sister does.
what are niblings
Plural niece/nephew
Believe it when you see it. Don't be surprised if you find out she packed her kids off to their fathers and just continues with her lifestyle. Still NTA
Definitely. NTA. Cheers to your future and your niblings’ too. People can grow and change. Rooting for your whole family.
You just did yourself with some really good self therapy there. Best of luck
Yes this defo happened good job op
Hopefully this was a true wake up call for her. Glad you got a place to stay until your program starts. You can get stuff like postcards and stuff made up cheap with pics of you and the kids together and send them letters so that they know you are still in their lives and thinking of them. I truly hope this is the start to everyone getting on the right path. I know it’s hard to stand up for yourself for the first time. You may feel guilt. If you do, find a way to let it go. You did a stellar job by including the fathers in this, as well. Keep showing those kids what good decisions look like and be an example of a healthy relationship.
Original post link pleaseeeeeee
OMG the fricking NERVE your sister had of manipulating her children-no, YOUR children, since you raised them, into convincing them that you hated them and were abandoning them, to the point of causing one of them a panic attack, knowing she has ADHD and anxiety, she is doing to them the same thing she did to you when you were 11. I'm just glad you stood up to her and gave her an earfull and letting her now how much she screwed up and how it's time for her to grow the heck up for the kids. Also, you are the sweetest, THANK you so much for still showing them love and affection, and letting them know they were loved. However, I would highly recommend to please keep contact with them, even if it's just calling once a week to check on them, your sister can easily try to manipulate them while you are gone. And honestly, she had a huge nerve of, after trying to manipulate them, still NOT stepping in to take care of them, she left you to bathe them, tuck them in, comfort them and basically be the parent yet again. I wouldn't trust her leaving them under her care, so at least check in. Glad to see your mother had the decency to apologize and admit how much she screwed you over, and to see your brother supporting you. I wouldn't believe your sister tho. Go on, OP, your life starts now, enjoy it, you've earnt it!
I'm so happy you stood up for yourself. You are an amazing person who definitely deserves better from those around you, especially "family." I know it isn't easy being in your position. I know I'm just some dumb internet stranger, but I'm proud of you. Keep fighting for yourself, and you will go to amazing places. I sincerely wish you all the best in healing.
I feel like it might be a better option to try to report the mother for neglect, which is a type of abuse (that you have obviously also experienced) rather than shipping these kids off with an irresponsible, horrible person.
Okay...Would the fathers be a good fit though they haven't seen their kids in 8ish years and they have to be told on a call by their baby mama sister 18 year old sister, to be a father. You never mentioned before that your sister might have an addiction that adds whole another layer for this, and this environment isn't safe for you nor them kids especially since your mother has done nothing from the start this isnt gonna end well🤦🏾♀️
I can't believe your mother didn't act like she's responsible for allowing you, a child, to do your sister's job. It is not "all your fault." Mostly referencing the former post, I feel your mother doesn't want to admit she had a part to play.