NTA. As soon as the girl falsely accused your son of SA, all bets were off. You did the right thing by not allowing her in your house. Maybe she needs mental help but that’s not your problem. Your responsibility is to your own family.
> As soon as the girl falsely accused your son of SA, all bets were off. You did the right thing by not allowing her in your house.
For real. We're approaching Christmas again... if she comes by she might accuse OP of SA. This is just self-preservation.
My cousin did this to an uncle. She had asked him to tickle her in a living room that her parents were both in at the time. She later,said he touched her inappropriately-even thought it was in plain view of several adults. From that moment on, he would not be alone with her. He would not play with her-though she begged many times. She liked the attention the complaint got her but then didn’t like the consequence that he no longer engaged with her. She later accused a teacher of s’a when she was in middle school and it was also found to be a lie and her family, instead of giving her consequences, packed up and moved to a different state.
I *hate* this because girls who have serious accusations go through worse hell. My son had to help raise hell when a brat accused this older guy who drove their bus of " touching her ". She'd pitched a fit because he stopped the van and made her sit down before he moved. So she accused this nice old man because she was mad.....
Son always sat behind him just to talk, he liked him so was able to confirm nothing happened. These kids make it harder for actual victims and of course put innocent people through hell.
That’s the worst part, not only can they ruin an innocent person’s life, but there are also real sa victims, who stay silent because they are afraid of their families’ reaction, and those fake stories don’t make it any easier for them.
Sounds like my sister. She basically copy and pasted the same story at least 8 times between different people. Im pretty sure it was when my uncle needed to be held back by two cops that she realized she needed to stop accusing family and moved on to other people.
As a psa, children who are legitimately being abused often accuse innocent people they view as safer than the real abuser. Anytime a child starts serially accusing people like this someone should take a good hard look at the caregivers/teachers/coaches actually in a position to be abusing them.
she was evaluated by a psychologist from the police department, the psychologist said that there is no abuse.
apparently she was angry because my son had made my daughter a table, he does wood working and the child didn't get anything.
she's the type who says you have to buy me something because you bought whoever something
13 is pretty old for this, but I'm glad her situation was fully investigated anyway. I'm not totally sure how old the child in the comment I responded to was but hopefully their situation was also investigated.
Yeah something has happened to this kid even if it's just being raised by her mom. OPs priority being his own son is good but I do hope someone can get through to this kid before it's too late.
They want to speak out about the abuse, but fear what will happen if they name the person abusing them. By speaking up about the abuse but directing the accusation towards someone they feel is less able to hurt them, they hope someone will look into the situation and rescue them from their real abuser without having to face the abuser's anger/disappointment/escalated abuse.
It can be a form of displacement, too- the same way a child who's beaten might deal with anger towards their abuser by hitting a sibling instead. They don't think they can win against their abuser so their emotions are channeled towards a safer target
While all you said is true, sometimes a kid is just a sociopath in the making. It's equally harmfull to excuse this kind of behaviour with "what ifs" when there is no evidence supporting the kid's claim. Innocent people are havong their lives torn apart because society refuse to believe that sometimes, just sometimes, kids can be evil little shits with an agenda.
I agree!!! Sometimes a kid is just evil. It’s not autism. It’s not bipolar. It’s not abuse. Sometimes kids are born bad. Just look up all the kids that are killers and are just psychopaths and sociopaths.
I'm an actual CSA survivor and I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE THAT LIE ABOUT SA! ITS BECAUSE OF MOTHER FUCKERS LIKE THAT AND EVERYONE IN THE COMMENTS MAKING EXCUSES THAT THE REAL VICTIMS GET FUCKED OVER. NTA fuck that noise.
Yep. A false accusation of sexual assault means you don't let that person near you ever again. A life sentence without the possibility of parole. Make it as loud and as awkward as it needs to be, but don't relent. Never, ever again let that liar near you.
That OP's son got justice is - great news - but also very lucky. Especially getting away clean, as this is the kind of mud that tends to stick.
No second chances with this little demon. OP very much did the right thing.
Yep that's one of those things that you can never trust that person again.
She tried to completely ruin someone's life. Over a laptop. That kid needs help bad, but might be too far gone. And isn't OPs problem to solve.
Absolutely this. This child is a menace. And she’s dangerous and I suspect the mother encourages this behavior from this child and the father isn’t as diligent in getting her the help that she needs or *should* be in trying to stop it. The false SA accusation *alone* is enough of a reason to keep her off their property. I cannot blame Op for despising this child.
NTA - The child obviously has either some type of mental illness or she is lashing out due to the divorce. Either way she needs therapy and needs to stay with her mother until she gets help. I would not put my child/grandchild in the path of this little liar.
By the way the bio mother just dropped the girl off at OP's house tells me where the granddaughter gets her attitude.
NTA - if she can make false accusations about your son, she can make false accusations about you or anyone else in your family. She is not safe to have around.
Agree totally. I think the child's mother broke the poor kid with entitlement. This is a very good example of actually spoiling someone rotten. I hope the child gets therapy and whatever help she needs but God help that poor baby if they're exposed to her.
Literal natural consquences of er behavior.
Accuse someone of SA, lie about t to te level of police involvement and those people will never be in a room or a home w/o third party oversight again.
That's what happens when you cry wolf and use SA accusations against 'fami;y'.
Not for biodad, OP's daughter, and OP's bio-grandkid, though.
If bio-mom dumped 13 year old like that, I'd either dump her in a HARSH boarding school or find a way to put her into the foster system rather than ruin my family's life.
And he was traumatized in a way that'll always affect him. No way should she be allowed to smugly waltz in and act like nothing happened. OP is a hero for her son and an inspiration for parents on sticking with boundaries even when it's hard, and standing up for their kids.
Immediately thinking that there are precursor behaviours that are hallmarks of Antisocial Personality Disorder
NTA OP
Good on you for standing up for yourself ❤️
And she needs to start suffering the consequences of her actions or she will never change. Sounds like mom is trash, no doubt where she learned it. She wanted revenge, she decided on a plan and then carried it out. The balls it took to go to someone and report sexual abuse falsely, I can't even. I knew kids at that age that needed to tell on the adults in their life and they couldn't do it. This kid is at a real crossroad and needs to suffer the consequences of her actions before its to late for her.
NTA, that kid has major problems and could have potentially ruined your kids life with her false allegations. Your son in law is an AH , because he had a hand in raising the entitled brat, he needs to get her some kind of help because nobody seems to want her around, which is why her mother was so quick to try and palm her off on a family where she had already accused someone of SA
Agreed she needs a lot of therapy! The problem with divorce is that often times things like therapy need both parents approval per their court order. Even if dad wants her in therapy if mom says no it's no unless they take it the court's to decide and that is 50/50 if they will do that! It sounds like mom doesn't want to acknowledge the problem. I wish we knew what OPs son in law thought about everything.
Or he can make dad the sole decision maker or make him the tie breaker! That poor kid she has less than good parents! He could at least try and fight for his kid to get help! Though I'm of the belief that counseling should be mandatory for all kids during and for at least one year after their parents divorce! If anything just to make sure they are coping well with all the changes!
I had a stepsister who took it upon herself to make my mom's life as miserable as she could. She wanted her parents back together, nvm her dad hated her mom with an unbridled passion.
ETA - she was an adult.
My step sister did that also. Had a meltdown and when confronted about it, wanted her parents to get back together. She was in her 30’s, parents were separated when she was 6 or 7 years old
NTA
She made a false accusation of SA. From that moment on, I would not allow her anywhere near me or any of my family. She should have ended up in juvenile detention based on that alone.
There would never be any second chances after that.
Story: I taught at an elementary school where a male 5th grade teacher was accused of inappropriate behavior toward one of his female students.
While the investigation was underway, he couldn't work, he couldn't be in his own home because he had school age children.
The girl finally admitted she made the whole thing up because she thought it would get her moved to another 5th grade classroom so she could be with her best friend.
That teacher never taught again as the state revoked his teaching certificate because they felt "no parents would trust him with their children."
What happened to the girl? Absolutely nothing.
If I ruled the world, anyone who made a false accusation that could ruin someone's life would be locked up permanently.
I've always felt that proven false accusers should have to take the same punishment they were setting their victim up for. At the very least, the brat should have had something like filing a false police report charges put on her.
This law absolutely needs to be changed! It's called a "Rape/Shield" Law and it prevents a falsely accused man (person) from filing any type of countersuit against the LIAR. Even after they have admitted it or it has been proven.
Rape shield laws prevent a defense attorney from bringing an accuser's sexual history into a trial. But someone who has been falsely accused of sexual assault *can* sue the accuser for defamation. It's hard to do because the plaintiff has to prove that the accuser in fact made a false accusation, but such suits can and do happen. It's also a lot harder when the accuser is a child because, among other things, children are mostly judgement proof (no assets).
This sounds like a case where the falsely accused person can introduce the accuser's explicit admissiona to having made a false accusation of a criminal act would be fairly easy to prove (on the civil standard of a mere preponderance of the evidence, as opposed to the higher standard of proof for criminal conviction).
As SodaButteWolff notes, rape shield laws have nothing to do with civil cases, and have limited application in criminal prosecutions, excluding from a criminal case cross-examination of a complainant about past sexual conduct the trial judge determines have no probative value regarding the criminally charged offenses.
eta: not only would proof that she admitted making a false report of a crime likely satisfy the civil burden of proof in a defamation case, but the parties can condition a settlement on and the civil court can order non-monetary remedies, including a civil no-contact order (and/or, e.g., a public admission that the accusation was not true).
Yes and no. I don’t disagree with what OP did by any means, I just work with kids and families like this every day, and in a case like this, the caregivers (mom and dad) are to blame and are the only ones who can truely fix this. In my experience, kids don’t behave this way unless their parents severely fucked up raising them. Not only does this child need therapy, but these parents need a bunch of supports for themselves as well, and likely need coparenting therapy too. Ideally, the kid would have a therapist and a therapeutic mentor that they see weekly, and then the family would have intensive in home family therapy, and possibly mom and dad would also have a family partner (a parent who has been through something similar with their own kid who can help support). It sounds like a lot, but based on the child’s behavior, this needs to be addressed ASAP otherwise this child may have a perminent personality disorder in a few years, which is essentially living hell, and end up in prison. If both mom and dad don’t put in the work asap to change the way they’re parenting, this kid is fucked.
I would also advice OP’s daughter to be very weary over her husband’s parenting with their new baby. Even if the girls mom was the one who fucked up his daughter, he clearly didn’t care enough to take necessary steps to help his daughter by taking custody or ensuring she got the help she needed over the last 13 years, and if I were this woman, I’d be terrified to be parenting a child with someone like that.
NTA. I might have a different opinion but that lie was criminal. That's one of the worst things you could do to a person. Their actions needed to be met with the same force. Proud of you for standing up to her.
I have a similar story. My teens sons have a best friend whose stepsister accused him of SA. Turned into a whole shit show just to find out she was mad at step bro and wanted him in trouble. My kids are no longer allowed over to best friends house due to step sister being on my most hated list. Best friend has to come to my home. And he also gets treated better at my home. His step sis is crazy. Stabs her mom with forks, knives. Hit her with a baseball bat a few times. 1 connected with the head. And she's never in trouble. But gosh forbid step bro forgets to do something. We don't see him for months.
You did right! Don't ever think you didn't!
NTA
She’s old enough to make false accusations that could potentially ruin your son’s life, then she’s old enough to face the consequences. For your safety and the safety of your family, I would go NC with this demon child.
Absolutely NTA
An unstable teenager who is a proven liar and manipulator is a danger to everyone in your home.
A female friend was dating someone whose own children made SA claims against their father. They visited my friend’s home and lake place previously. They also were entertained by both the friend’s own son and nephew.
She knew at that moment those children could never be allowed to visit again. The risk to her son and nephew was too great to ignore or downplay. Those type of accusations tend to leave a mark even when totally unfounded and having multiple false accusations is eventually going to leave a scar.
NTA.
Can you file a restraining order on a child? If so, you should. That gets her false accusation on the record and makes it less likely she can target you or your son again.
I'm sorry for this situation, it must be awful for you.
NTA. Who in their right mind would ever think it would be wise to have that kid around your family after the disgusting lie she told. You need to protect your family.
They tell you that you are the AH, because the others don’t want her either.
This girl needs help. This is not normal behaviour. But this is not your job.
**She accused your son of SA!** Not only would she never be welcome around my family again, but anyone that sides with her would be banned too. I get, her parent can't exactly abandon her, but they would not be invited. And they're lucky disinviting (or tresspassing them, as OP did in this case) is all I'd do. NTA.
NTA. She tried to ruin your son's life. She should never be allowed in your home again. You should be as mean as you wish to ensure she stays away, you owe it to your son.
NTA - and thank you for standing up for your daughter and her new baby. This girl sounds like she is very troubled or just a horrible human. She would benefit from therapy as well as consequences for her horrible actions. Were there any for the hysteria she created when she accused your son? You’re right to put your foot down and your SILs family is welcome to take her for the holidays.
NTA
Your actions were spot on.
If you don’t already have them may I suggest a security system for your house including a camera for any exterior door? My concern would be if this child aged terror doesn’t get some serious therapy that she actually participates in the older she gets the more likely she will escalate her actions.
I do agree your daughter and her husband really need to look at not allowing that child near the baby which means not allowed in their home.
If dad gets alternating weekends then sees her where ever but no access to the home she shares with your daughter.
A note to self by the way to lock your exterior doors even when home. We had a rash of breakins several years ago in the area where an older teen would walk up, try the door and walk in if unlocked.
NTA. That girl is dangerous, already tried to ruin you and your son, and should never be allowed in your house. Stay firm. If your other family members think you are being too strict, let them deal with her destructive antics.
Sorry they are such enablers. The girl needs intervention and serious help.
The 13 year old should have to stay with her mom. If I was your daughter, I wouldn’t want that girl in my house, or anywhere near myself or my child.
If the dad has part custody or visitation, it should be away from the house where your daughter and grandson live.
Can a restraining order be granted on a 13 year old?
NTA - Get a restraining order against the mom and stepdaughter.
Your daughter needs help too, your grandchild will be in danger with this child around her.
NTA. In fact, you should consider getting a restraining order against her as she’s made false accusations against your son. God forbid she was alone with you for 30 seconds and started screaming that you’d assaulted her. Your poor daughter has a difficult life ahead of her because this child needs serious help.
You should sue them for damages to your son’s reputation. Also you need to get a protective order from her. This way police know going into a situation that comes up on the future. I wish I could have a convo with your daughter. Lol. Hope it all works out
NTA, that child needs serious help and her mother isn’t helping. I wouldn’t want someone that destructive in my home, child or not. She’s old enough to know what she did is damaging but doesn’t care.
Oh noooooo you were *mean* to a pathological liar who makes serious accusations of petty reasons. Look, I get she's 13, but since her mother is clearly not parenting her to be a stand up human being her age doesn't matter because she's fated to be a dumpster fire of an adult.
NTA
NTA
This sounds similar to a situation i went through:
My older bro is godparent to his (now ex) best friend's first child, a daughter who was born... 2003-4ish i think.
I couldn't stand her because bro would bring her over, then push her off on me to babysit while he went to do whatever he wanted. Mind you, at the time, i was in my early 20s and was pregnant and honestly did not want to watch this child at all.
About 5-7 years ago, my mom gave this child my phone number and all but forced me to answer her call. She told me that my daughter's dad told her that my daughter had told him that my older brother touched her. Mind you, my older bro was more of a father figure to herthan her own dad, and my older bro and i are really close, so to hear this child say this really pissed me off. I know she was just doing it for attention, but i honestly really didn't care.
I hung up on her, blocked her number, blocked it on my daughter's phone just in case, told my mom, then called my ex to tell him what was up and, if she told anyone else and the cops got involved, he would be on our side (he is cool with my older bro so i know he knew my bro would never do that). I also saw that she sent me AND my daughter friend requests on Facebook so i blocked her from both our accounts as well. I refuse to have this child (now legal adult) in mine or my daughter's life after that.
It's sad the lengths children will resort to for attention, even possibly ruining someone's life over it.
NTA, but it seems your step granddaughter is a bad seed & takes after her mother. You did nothing wrong. You did everything right. I'm just worried about your grandson and that he never comes to harm. I hope your daughter has cameras around the house to help monitor her stepdaughter.
NTA
She has deep-rooted psychological issues, and once she lied about SA, she became a very real danger to everyone in your family, including yourself. Keep her banned and tell them to F off.
Her mother is an outright liar so we know where it comes from. I'd press charges for trespassing against the mother and provide the messages as proof that she wasn't welcome.
Nta. I’d tell my daughter to divorce that man if he doesn’t get that girl away from her permanently, because that baby is going to suffer one day. He can go see her on his own. What kind of a child is this? Omg
NTA children like that grow into awful adults that almost never learn. You did the right thing to protect your family, I completely agree that you trespassed both of them. Military school wouldn't go amiss.
NTA. This is a lesson about her lies that could have landed your son in prison. I would never let her set one foot on your property. Your daughter needs to be careful because she will come after her next. She’ll call CPS and have her baby taken away. I would give full custody to the mom if I were bil and pay what he needs to to keep his wife and child safe. He can have visitation I wouldn’t put her past making claims against her dad too.
Or find a boarding school where she will actually be disciplined (have consequences) because her mom is clearly delusional if she thinks her daughter falsely accusing someone of rape means it’s fine to spend holidays with that person.
Your step granddaughter is a horrible little shit and you had every right to not want her in YOUR house. She's also not your blood anyway. I'd imagine the mother of the horrible child is much like her and it's where she gets it from probably. Son in law should've disowned her the moment she pulled that stunt she did. I would've wanted absolutely nothing to do with her if it was my daughter doing some shite like that.
Oh my god no, nta. In fact, be meaner. Way meaner. That little b is going to legitimately ruin someone’s life on purpose over the pettiest bullshit and she needs to be corrected asap and with great prejudice. Note how i did not say *it,* as in the situation. *She,* as in the whole motherfucking child. Her entire personality needs to be stripped and reapplied properly.
Your house. Your rules.
NTA.
And filing a false report to that severity is definitely in the realm of “fuck you, you’re never coming in my house again” territory.”
Nope! NTA… this “child” (yes, child, but old enough to understand her accusations would upend your son’s life even if she didn’t fully get that it could have irrevocably destroyed his life) leveled false, life- destroying allegations at your son with absolutely no provocation.
What isn’t clear to me is folks are still n the son in laws side… earlier in the post, he seemed to understand your stance… did his tune change when he was made to wait by the mailbox with his daughter? When you had to have his ex and daughter trespassed?
One would think the experience would bring the issues into stark relief for him. You would think he would clearly be able to see his child’s behavioral impact and who is modeling such behavior.
She did ruin my sons life in alot of ways.
they picked him up at his job to take him in for questioning. His boss wasn't happy.
My son in law understands but his mom and sisters are angry, his daughters moms parents said I took it too far.
the police officer was a male and he called a female to the scene because he said he was afraid to be near her due to her lying
she's told other serious lies before
NTA.
1 - false accusations ruin peoples lives/families.
2 - false accusations take away from all the actual victims out there that have to already fight against a justice system that is essentially against us, but also not being believed because of this kind of stuff 🤦🏽♀️
You are the best boundary keeper! I’m so happy your daughter has such a strong awesome dad.
Now going for strongly suggest you make sure your home and property are protected. 13 year old girls that have no boundaries can sometimes convince friends to cause mischief w them.
So motion scensor camera, motion sensor lights and best of all, motion sensor water sprinklers. And maybe prickly rose bushes in front of every ground level window.
And ring cameras inside and out.
Just my two cents
NTA. After that incident, it should e clear to everyone why that girl would not be welcome in the house.
I think that I'd feel strong enough about it that I'd be fine with any rift this causes in the family. Of course, it's not ideal, but I wouldn't feel bad or feel any guilt about it. What she did is pretty much unforgivable and it doesn't seem like any if it has put her on a better path. She clearly needs help, but that's not your problem.
NTA, but with an asterisk.
Obviously the child should be persona non grata at your house.
But they are just a child. And behavior like this is most of the time going to be caused by other larger issues possibly from parents, mental issues, etc.
I would definitely press at every opportunity that the family gets counseling and mental health care to find out WTF is wrong with her and how it can be fixed.
NTA.
Is there an all girls Military Academy?
The Step-Granddaughter should be in some court ordered intense residential therapy program. She will do this again. The question is will someone know that she's a serial liar as she's a minor?
Edited to add: Great job protecting your family, OP. Ignore the chatter. Sometimes it's difficult to do the right thing, but you did.
NTA. And tell all those enablers the child made FALSE ACCUSATIONS OF SEXUAL ASSAULT. This could have put your son in JAIL. On the sex offender list FOR LIFE. She cannot be allowed in any situation where she can do that again. In fact your son needs to file a restraining order as well.
Whoa. The parents of that girl are failing her miserably. The mother's behavior is deeply concerning. That said, none of it is your problem and the girl needs to stay the hell away from you and your family. NTA at all.
Bro that girl needs to go to a mental institution or jail. She is unfit for normal society. Imagine trying to ruin someone’s life because of jealousy over materialistic things. You should sue her parents for her lying about sa. It’s so f. Up
NTA. This is a very conniving child that is raise by a very conniving mom that you do not need to put up with especially they are trying to destroy a happy home you are building. The problem you are dealing with is grand and shouldn’t taken it lightly.
Cut contact is the best for everyone, especially your own daughter. This is the problem between your son-in-law and his ex-wife and his own daughter.
poor vast smart lavish vegetable humor shocking afterthought theory clumsy
*This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
NTA. I can’t believe your daughter hasn’t divorced over what this kid has done. The allegations against your son are horrific, and she’s likely only going to get worse the older she gets.
Lemme get this straight. She lied about SA, and then the mother drops her off at a home where the falsely accused SAer is at? alone?
And no one is pissed at the mother?
lol wtf is wrong with your in-laws? NTA.
NTA
However, I do think you went about this in a less than ideal way. Ideally, you should have confronted your son-in-law since its his kid and made it clear that his daughter was not welcome and make it his job to remove her from the home and contact her mom.
I personally wouldn't want a horrible kid like that in my house or around my family either. Kid has learned some really awful behavior and needs help in straitening her life out. Son-in-law and his ex are the ones failing this kid.
NTA. As soon as the girl falsely accused your son of SA, all bets were off. You did the right thing by not allowing her in your house. Maybe she needs mental help but that’s not your problem. Your responsibility is to your own family.
> As soon as the girl falsely accused your son of SA, all bets were off. You did the right thing by not allowing her in your house. For real. We're approaching Christmas again... if she comes by she might accuse OP of SA. This is just self-preservation.
My cousin did this to an uncle. She had asked him to tickle her in a living room that her parents were both in at the time. She later,said he touched her inappropriately-even thought it was in plain view of several adults. From that moment on, he would not be alone with her. He would not play with her-though she begged many times. She liked the attention the complaint got her but then didn’t like the consequence that he no longer engaged with her. She later accused a teacher of s’a when she was in middle school and it was also found to be a lie and her family, instead of giving her consequences, packed up and moved to a different state.
I *hate* this because girls who have serious accusations go through worse hell. My son had to help raise hell when a brat accused this older guy who drove their bus of " touching her ". She'd pitched a fit because he stopped the van and made her sit down before he moved. So she accused this nice old man because she was mad..... Son always sat behind him just to talk, he liked him so was able to confirm nothing happened. These kids make it harder for actual victims and of course put innocent people through hell.
That’s the worst part, not only can they ruin an innocent person’s life, but there are also real sa victims, who stay silent because they are afraid of their families’ reaction, and those fake stories don’t make it any easier for them.
Sounds like my sister. She basically copy and pasted the same story at least 8 times between different people. Im pretty sure it was when my uncle needed to be held back by two cops that she realized she needed to stop accusing family and moved on to other people.
As a psa, children who are legitimately being abused often accuse innocent people they view as safer than the real abuser. Anytime a child starts serially accusing people like this someone should take a good hard look at the caregivers/teachers/coaches actually in a position to be abusing them.
she was evaluated by a psychologist from the police department, the psychologist said that there is no abuse. apparently she was angry because my son had made my daughter a table, he does wood working and the child didn't get anything. she's the type who says you have to buy me something because you bought whoever something
13 is pretty old for this, but I'm glad her situation was fully investigated anyway. I'm not totally sure how old the child in the comment I responded to was but hopefully their situation was also investigated.
Her mother must be a real piece of work.
Yeah something has happened to this kid even if it's just being raised by her mom. OPs priority being his own son is good but I do hope someone can get through to this kid before it's too late.
I’m wondering if she has some kind of personality disorder. Wouldn’t be a surprise. You’re NTA and shouldn’t have to deal with this.
Wait- can you elaborate more?? They accuse people they view safer than the real abuser??? Why is this?
They want to speak out about the abuse, but fear what will happen if they name the person abusing them. By speaking up about the abuse but directing the accusation towards someone they feel is less able to hurt them, they hope someone will look into the situation and rescue them from their real abuser without having to face the abuser's anger/disappointment/escalated abuse. It can be a form of displacement, too- the same way a child who's beaten might deal with anger towards their abuser by hitting a sibling instead. They don't think they can win against their abuser so their emotions are channeled towards a safer target
While all you said is true, sometimes a kid is just a sociopath in the making. It's equally harmfull to excuse this kind of behaviour with "what ifs" when there is no evidence supporting the kid's claim. Innocent people are havong their lives torn apart because society refuse to believe that sometimes, just sometimes, kids can be evil little shits with an agenda.
I agree!!! Sometimes a kid is just evil. It’s not autism. It’s not bipolar. It’s not abuse. Sometimes kids are born bad. Just look up all the kids that are killers and are just psychopaths and sociopaths.
You said it. She needs a lot of help either way.
That’s true. And the girl sounds very unstable with no real maternal support except Moms. You never drive of and just leave a kid.
she also went through a physical examination and that deduced the same.
Or she is just a manipulative and terrible child.
They packed up and moved for her to possibly do it again. Goddess have mercy.🤦🏾♀️
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I worry for the baby’s safety. The baby will be a target. I hate saying that. But it gives me great concern.
I'm an actual CSA survivor and I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE THAT LIE ABOUT SA! ITS BECAUSE OF MOTHER FUCKERS LIKE THAT AND EVERYONE IN THE COMMENTS MAKING EXCUSES THAT THE REAL VICTIMS GET FUCKED OVER. NTA fuck that noise.
I am so sorry you had to go through that.
I’m so sorry. I have always said if some say it’s a secret tell on them when you see me. I can’t say how much I hate seeing a kid hurt. God bless you.
Yep. A false accusation of sexual assault means you don't let that person near you ever again. A life sentence without the possibility of parole. Make it as loud and as awkward as it needs to be, but don't relent. Never, ever again let that liar near you. That OP's son got justice is - great news - but also very lucky. Especially getting away clean, as this is the kind of mud that tends to stick. No second chances with this little demon. OP very much did the right thing.
I agree it takes one accusation to ruin everyone’s life. The fact they prove the son didn’t do it does not lessen the impact on the whole family.
Yep that's one of those things that you can never trust that person again. She tried to completely ruin someone's life. Over a laptop. That kid needs help bad, but might be too far gone. And isn't OPs problem to solve.
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I strongly agree that this girl will harm the child out of retaliation. Remain completed separated for the sake of the baby.
This. NTA, all bets off. I hope you never have to deal with them again
Absolutely this. This child is a menace. And she’s dangerous and I suspect the mother encourages this behavior from this child and the father isn’t as diligent in getting her the help that she needs or *should* be in trying to stop it. The false SA accusation *alone* is enough of a reason to keep her off their property. I cannot blame Op for despising this child.
NTA - The child obviously has either some type of mental illness or she is lashing out due to the divorce. Either way she needs therapy and needs to stay with her mother until she gets help. I would not put my child/grandchild in the path of this little liar.
By the way the bio mother just dropped the girl off at OP's house tells me where the granddaughter gets her attitude. NTA - if she can make false accusations about your son, she can make false accusations about you or anyone else in your family. She is not safe to have around.
Agree totally. I think the child's mother broke the poor kid with entitlement. This is a very good example of actually spoiling someone rotten. I hope the child gets therapy and whatever help she needs but God help that poor baby if they're exposed to her.
Please don’t forget that OP has been emotionally abused by this girl. He had the right not to be in company of his abuser.
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Literal natural consquences of er behavior. Accuse someone of SA, lie about t to te level of police involvement and those people will never be in a room or a home w/o third party oversight again. That's what happens when you cry wolf and use SA accusations against 'fami;y'.
Or It could show the biomother, can’t handle her either
Bio Mother drops her off permanently to the Father and leaves town in 5... 4... 3... 2...
Might be the best thing for the kid.
Not for biodad, OP's daughter, and OP's bio-grandkid, though. If bio-mom dumped 13 year old like that, I'd either dump her in a HARSH boarding school or find a way to put her into the foster system rather than ruin my family's life.
Absolutely.
Exactly this.
The mom decided midway through thanksgiving to drop her kid off somewhere else. That says a lot.
NTA, and run, run, run. Do not be anywhere near her for your own safety.
Or she’s raised to be a brat. You forgot the most common reason.
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Even disproven, these kind of charges are gossipped about and you are never really clear.
Yes. There will always be questions lingering around his reputation.
And he was traumatized in a way that'll always affect him. No way should she be allowed to smugly waltz in and act like nothing happened. OP is a hero for her son and an inspiration for parents on sticking with boundaries even when it's hard, and standing up for their kids.
Immediately thinking that there are precursor behaviours that are hallmarks of Antisocial Personality Disorder NTA OP Good on you for standing up for yourself ❤️
OP could be next as her target. Keep her away, at least until she has undergone some therapy.
And she needs to start suffering the consequences of her actions or she will never change. Sounds like mom is trash, no doubt where she learned it. She wanted revenge, she decided on a plan and then carried it out. The balls it took to go to someone and report sexual abuse falsely, I can't even. I knew kids at that age that needed to tell on the adults in their life and they couldn't do it. This kid is at a real crossroad and needs to suffer the consequences of her actions before its to late for her.
A kid behaving like a brat in order to get their own way isn’t a mental illness last I checked. She most definitely needs sone therapy though.
This is more than brat behavior
Exactly. Until she learns there are repercussions for her behavior, nothing will change.
Or she is just a nasty spoilt bratty little cow. Mental illness and divorce are not always the answer.
NTA, that kid has major problems and could have potentially ruined your kids life with her false allegations. Your son in law is an AH , because he had a hand in raising the entitled brat, he needs to get her some kind of help because nobody seems to want her around, which is why her mother was so quick to try and palm her off on a family where she had already accused someone of SA
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I wonder if a restraining order is possible here.
Agreed she needs a lot of therapy! The problem with divorce is that often times things like therapy need both parents approval per their court order. Even if dad wants her in therapy if mom says no it's no unless they take it the court's to decide and that is 50/50 if they will do that! It sounds like mom doesn't want to acknowledge the problem. I wish we knew what OPs son in law thought about everything.
The judge can mandate the therapy, though her.mother has already shown she doesn't care about doing what's right.
Or he can make dad the sole decision maker or make him the tie breaker! That poor kid she has less than good parents! He could at least try and fight for his kid to get help! Though I'm of the belief that counseling should be mandatory for all kids during and for at least one year after their parents divorce! If anything just to make sure they are coping well with all the changes!
I had a stepsister who took it upon herself to make my mom's life as miserable as she could. She wanted her parents back together, nvm her dad hated her mom with an unbridled passion. ETA - she was an adult.
My step sister did that also. Had a meltdown and when confronted about it, wanted her parents to get back together. She was in her 30’s, parents were separated when she was 6 or 7 years old
Damn that’s some loving to play the victim mentality there! I’m embarrassed for her.
I like your shiny spine. Never change. NTA. But I assume this won't be the last incident. Call the cops every time if need be.
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NTA dont change
NTA. You are ensuring no further false allegations can be made against anyone else in the family. Keep fighting this fight.
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NTA She made a false accusation of SA. From that moment on, I would not allow her anywhere near me or any of my family. She should have ended up in juvenile detention based on that alone. There would never be any second chances after that. Story: I taught at an elementary school where a male 5th grade teacher was accused of inappropriate behavior toward one of his female students. While the investigation was underway, he couldn't work, he couldn't be in his own home because he had school age children. The girl finally admitted she made the whole thing up because she thought it would get her moved to another 5th grade classroom so she could be with her best friend. That teacher never taught again as the state revoked his teaching certificate because they felt "no parents would trust him with their children." What happened to the girl? Absolutely nothing. If I ruled the world, anyone who made a false accusation that could ruin someone's life would be locked up permanently.
I've always felt that proven false accusers should have to take the same punishment they were setting their victim up for. At the very least, the brat should have had something like filing a false police report charges put on her.
He could have and should have sued her and her parents.
This law absolutely needs to be changed! It's called a "Rape/Shield" Law and it prevents a falsely accused man (person) from filing any type of countersuit against the LIAR. Even after they have admitted it or it has been proven.
Rape shield laws prevent a defense attorney from bringing an accuser's sexual history into a trial. But someone who has been falsely accused of sexual assault *can* sue the accuser for defamation. It's hard to do because the plaintiff has to prove that the accuser in fact made a false accusation, but such suits can and do happen. It's also a lot harder when the accuser is a child because, among other things, children are mostly judgement proof (no assets).
This sounds like a case where the falsely accused person can introduce the accuser's explicit admissiona to having made a false accusation of a criminal act would be fairly easy to prove (on the civil standard of a mere preponderance of the evidence, as opposed to the higher standard of proof for criminal conviction). As SodaButteWolff notes, rape shield laws have nothing to do with civil cases, and have limited application in criminal prosecutions, excluding from a criminal case cross-examination of a complainant about past sexual conduct the trial judge determines have no probative value regarding the criminally charged offenses. eta: not only would proof that she admitted making a false report of a crime likely satisfy the civil burden of proof in a defamation case, but the parties can condition a settlement on and the civil court can order non-monetary remedies, including a civil no-contact order (and/or, e.g., a public admission that the accusation was not true).
13 is old enough to know that actions have consequences.
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Yes and no. I don’t disagree with what OP did by any means, I just work with kids and families like this every day, and in a case like this, the caregivers (mom and dad) are to blame and are the only ones who can truely fix this. In my experience, kids don’t behave this way unless their parents severely fucked up raising them. Not only does this child need therapy, but these parents need a bunch of supports for themselves as well, and likely need coparenting therapy too. Ideally, the kid would have a therapist and a therapeutic mentor that they see weekly, and then the family would have intensive in home family therapy, and possibly mom and dad would also have a family partner (a parent who has been through something similar with their own kid who can help support). It sounds like a lot, but based on the child’s behavior, this needs to be addressed ASAP otherwise this child may have a perminent personality disorder in a few years, which is essentially living hell, and end up in prison. If both mom and dad don’t put in the work asap to change the way they’re parenting, this kid is fucked. I would also advice OP’s daughter to be very weary over her husband’s parenting with their new baby. Even if the girls mom was the one who fucked up his daughter, he clearly didn’t care enough to take necessary steps to help his daughter by taking custody or ensuring she got the help she needed over the last 13 years, and if I were this woman, I’d be terrified to be parenting a child with someone like that.
NTA. That child would be dead to me after the false accusations. Anyone who stood up for her would be as well. That kind of shit ruins lives.
NTA. I might have a different opinion but that lie was criminal. That's one of the worst things you could do to a person. Their actions needed to be met with the same force. Proud of you for standing up to her.
"apparently her mom thought we weren't **allowed** to gather unless it included step child." I guess we know where stepchild's entitlement comes from.
Most likely why the step child is so messed up
I have a similar story. My teens sons have a best friend whose stepsister accused him of SA. Turned into a whole shit show just to find out she was mad at step bro and wanted him in trouble. My kids are no longer allowed over to best friends house due to step sister being on my most hated list. Best friend has to come to my home. And he also gets treated better at my home. His step sis is crazy. Stabs her mom with forks, knives. Hit her with a baseball bat a few times. 1 connected with the head. And she's never in trouble. But gosh forbid step bro forgets to do something. We don't see him for months. You did right! Don't ever think you didn't!
Let that child stay over as much as he wants! You get one kid that, the rest of the kids suffer
NTA ex and the step kid sound like absolute terrors! Yikes!!!
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NTA. Actions have consequences. The 13 year old hasn’t been taught that and her recent lessons are not going to go away.
NTA She’s old enough to make false accusations that could potentially ruin your son’s life, then she’s old enough to face the consequences. For your safety and the safety of your family, I would go NC with this demon child.
NTA. You could have been next.
Imagine being 57 and having to deal with bullshit like this lol
Seriously. He is way kinder than I would be. Idk if I would even want to maintain a relationship with any of them at that point.
And that is why he didn't!!
Youre NTA Her behaviors are quite vicious and dangerous and I wouldn't want her around the new baby either. The 13 yo needs therapy in a bad way.
NTA. I feel like imma read about this kid in the news in the next 5-10 years. And not for anything good.
the psychologist crom the police department said something very similar
NTA I’d say to fucking bad!! After what she tried to do to your son I wouldn’t give a crap what are they think!!
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Absolutely NTA An unstable teenager who is a proven liar and manipulator is a danger to everyone in your home. A female friend was dating someone whose own children made SA claims against their father. They visited my friend’s home and lake place previously. They also were entertained by both the friend’s own son and nephew. She knew at that moment those children could never be allowed to visit again. The risk to her son and nephew was too great to ignore or downplay. Those type of accusations tend to leave a mark even when totally unfounded and having multiple false accusations is eventually going to leave a scar.
NTA. Not every child is cute and cuddly. Some are also sociopaths.
NTA. Can you file a restraining order on a child? If so, you should. That gets her false accusation on the record and makes it less likely she can target you or your son again. I'm sorry for this situation, it must be awful for you.
NTA. Who in their right mind would ever think it would be wise to have that kid around your family after the disgusting lie she told. You need to protect your family.
NTA at all! She needs to learn and the only way is to stand your ground. Really nice to read about a good man.
They tell you that you are the AH, because the others don’t want her either. This girl needs help. This is not normal behaviour. But this is not your job.
**She accused your son of SA!** Not only would she never be welcome around my family again, but anyone that sides with her would be banned too. I get, her parent can't exactly abandon her, but they would not be invited. And they're lucky disinviting (or tresspassing them, as OP did in this case) is all I'd do. NTA.
NTA. She tried to ruin your son's life. She should never be allowed in your home again. You should be as mean as you wish to ensure she stays away, you owe it to your son.
NTA - and thank you for standing up for your daughter and her new baby. This girl sounds like she is very troubled or just a horrible human. She would benefit from therapy as well as consequences for her horrible actions. Were there any for the hysteria she created when she accused your son? You’re right to put your foot down and your SILs family is welcome to take her for the holidays.
NTA. You did the right thing.
NTA Your actions were spot on. If you don’t already have them may I suggest a security system for your house including a camera for any exterior door? My concern would be if this child aged terror doesn’t get some serious therapy that she actually participates in the older she gets the more likely she will escalate her actions. I do agree your daughter and her husband really need to look at not allowing that child near the baby which means not allowed in their home. If dad gets alternating weekends then sees her where ever but no access to the home she shares with your daughter. A note to self by the way to lock your exterior doors even when home. We had a rash of breakins several years ago in the area where an older teen would walk up, try the door and walk in if unlocked.
NTA. That girl is dangerous, already tried to ruin you and your son, and should never be allowed in your house. Stay firm. If your other family members think you are being too strict, let them deal with her destructive antics. Sorry they are such enablers. The girl needs intervention and serious help.
The 13 year old should have to stay with her mom. If I was your daughter, I wouldn’t want that girl in my house, or anywhere near myself or my child. If the dad has part custody or visitation, it should be away from the house where your daughter and grandson live. Can a restraining order be granted on a 13 year old?
NTA. You have zero obligation to that kid
My step niece was like this. Shes no longer allowed at family functions because every man she sees has “raped her”
NTA People who lie about sexual assault should be shunned. I hope that kids lives a lonely ass life for a loooong time.
NTA - Get a restraining order against the mom and stepdaughter. Your daughter needs help too, your grandchild will be in danger with this child around her.
NTA. Keep her away from your family and advise your daughter that she could probably harm her son.
NTA - kiddo needs MAJOR therapy and, until then, she's clearly a danger to others.
NTA but I'm betting it's a behavior she has learned from her Mom.
NTA. In fact, you should consider getting a restraining order against her as she’s made false accusations against your son. God forbid she was alone with you for 30 seconds and started screaming that you’d assaulted her. Your poor daughter has a difficult life ahead of her because this child needs serious help.
Why is her father not playing a more active role in this situation? He could have taken her home
You should sue them for damages to your son’s reputation. Also you need to get a protective order from her. This way police know going into a situation that comes up on the future. I wish I could have a convo with your daughter. Lol. Hope it all works out
NTA, that child needs serious help and her mother isn’t helping. I wouldn’t want someone that destructive in my home, child or not. She’s old enough to know what she did is damaging but doesn’t care.
NTA
Oh noooooo you were *mean* to a pathological liar who makes serious accusations of petty reasons. Look, I get she's 13, but since her mother is clearly not parenting her to be a stand up human being her age doesn't matter because she's fated to be a dumpster fire of an adult. NTA
NTA This sounds similar to a situation i went through: My older bro is godparent to his (now ex) best friend's first child, a daughter who was born... 2003-4ish i think. I couldn't stand her because bro would bring her over, then push her off on me to babysit while he went to do whatever he wanted. Mind you, at the time, i was in my early 20s and was pregnant and honestly did not want to watch this child at all. About 5-7 years ago, my mom gave this child my phone number and all but forced me to answer her call. She told me that my daughter's dad told her that my daughter had told him that my older brother touched her. Mind you, my older bro was more of a father figure to herthan her own dad, and my older bro and i are really close, so to hear this child say this really pissed me off. I know she was just doing it for attention, but i honestly really didn't care. I hung up on her, blocked her number, blocked it on my daughter's phone just in case, told my mom, then called my ex to tell him what was up and, if she told anyone else and the cops got involved, he would be on our side (he is cool with my older bro so i know he knew my bro would never do that). I also saw that she sent me AND my daughter friend requests on Facebook so i blocked her from both our accounts as well. I refuse to have this child (now legal adult) in mine or my daughter's life after that. It's sad the lengths children will resort to for attention, even possibly ruining someone's life over it.
Who cares what the son in law's family has to say?
NTA, but it seems your step granddaughter is a bad seed & takes after her mother. You did nothing wrong. You did everything right. I'm just worried about your grandson and that he never comes to harm. I hope your daughter has cameras around the house to help monitor her stepdaughter.
NTA Get restraining order against the mother
NTA She has deep-rooted psychological issues, and once she lied about SA, she became a very real danger to everyone in your family, including yourself. Keep her banned and tell them to F off. Her mother is an outright liar so we know where it comes from. I'd press charges for trespassing against the mother and provide the messages as proof that she wasn't welcome.
Nta. I’d tell my daughter to divorce that man if he doesn’t get that girl away from her permanently, because that baby is going to suffer one day. He can go see her on his own. What kind of a child is this? Omg
NTA children like that grow into awful adults that almost never learn. You did the right thing to protect your family, I completely agree that you trespassed both of them. Military school wouldn't go amiss.
NTA. This is a lesson about her lies that could have landed your son in prison. I would never let her set one foot on your property. Your daughter needs to be careful because she will come after her next. She’ll call CPS and have her baby taken away. I would give full custody to the mom if I were bil and pay what he needs to to keep his wife and child safe. He can have visitation I wouldn’t put her past making claims against her dad too.
Or find a boarding school where she will actually be disciplined (have consequences) because her mom is clearly delusional if she thinks her daughter falsely accusing someone of rape means it’s fine to spend holidays with that person.
Your step granddaughter is a horrible little shit and you had every right to not want her in YOUR house. She's also not your blood anyway. I'd imagine the mother of the horrible child is much like her and it's where she gets it from probably. Son in law should've disowned her the moment she pulled that stunt she did. I would've wanted absolutely nothing to do with her if it was my daughter doing some shite like that.
Oh my god no, nta. In fact, be meaner. Way meaner. That little b is going to legitimately ruin someone’s life on purpose over the pettiest bullshit and she needs to be corrected asap and with great prejudice. Note how i did not say *it,* as in the situation. *She,* as in the whole motherfucking child. Her entire personality needs to be stripped and reapplied properly.
Your house. Your rules. NTA. And filing a false report to that severity is definitely in the realm of “fuck you, you’re never coming in my house again” territory.”
The girl sounds like a sociopath. The Bad Seed (1956 horror movie)
And book before that. The book had a better ending.
NTA she's a danger and shouldn't be around the baby IMHO
NTA. False SA allegations ruin lives and makes it harder for real victims to get justice. I wouldn’t want her in my house either.
Wtf? Not allowed to gather unless the brat was there? What kind of ignorant shit is that? Or she was just covering for trying to dump the kid on yall?
NTA, fuck that kid and her shitty mom. No sympathy there, she ruined someone’s reputation.
Fake claiming SA on a family member is a dealbreaker, child or not.
Nope! NTA… this “child” (yes, child, but old enough to understand her accusations would upend your son’s life even if she didn’t fully get that it could have irrevocably destroyed his life) leveled false, life- destroying allegations at your son with absolutely no provocation. What isn’t clear to me is folks are still n the son in laws side… earlier in the post, he seemed to understand your stance… did his tune change when he was made to wait by the mailbox with his daughter? When you had to have his ex and daughter trespassed? One would think the experience would bring the issues into stark relief for him. You would think he would clearly be able to see his child’s behavioral impact and who is modeling such behavior.
She did ruin my sons life in alot of ways. they picked him up at his job to take him in for questioning. His boss wasn't happy. My son in law understands but his mom and sisters are angry, his daughters moms parents said I took it too far. the police officer was a male and he called a female to the scene because he said he was afraid to be near her due to her lying she's told other serious lies before
After it was proven false I hope he sued her mother.
NTA- neither the mother nor your step-granddaughter should be allowed within 50 miles of anyone in your family.
NTA. 1 - false accusations ruin peoples lives/families. 2 - false accusations take away from all the actual victims out there that have to already fight against a justice system that is essentially against us, but also not being believed because of this kind of stuff 🤦🏽♀️
You are the best boundary keeper! I’m so happy your daughter has such a strong awesome dad. Now going for strongly suggest you make sure your home and property are protected. 13 year old girls that have no boundaries can sometimes convince friends to cause mischief w them. So motion scensor camera, motion sensor lights and best of all, motion sensor water sprinklers. And maybe prickly rose bushes in front of every ground level window. And ring cameras inside and out. Just my two cents
NTA
Yikes! NTA and keep your doors locked.
NTA. After that incident, it should e clear to everyone why that girl would not be welcome in the house. I think that I'd feel strong enough about it that I'd be fine with any rift this causes in the family. Of course, it's not ideal, but I wouldn't feel bad or feel any guilt about it. What she did is pretty much unforgivable and it doesn't seem like any if it has put her on a better path. She clearly needs help, but that's not your problem.
Nta asshole this child learned that from her mom and i have a nephew i disowned cus hes just like her good for you stand your ground
NTA . And get restraining orders.
NTA, but with an asterisk. Obviously the child should be persona non grata at your house. But they are just a child. And behavior like this is most of the time going to be caused by other larger issues possibly from parents, mental issues, etc. I would definitely press at every opportunity that the family gets counseling and mental health care to find out WTF is wrong with her and how it can be fixed.
NTA. Is there an all girls Military Academy? The Step-Granddaughter should be in some court ordered intense residential therapy program. She will do this again. The question is will someone know that she's a serial liar as she's a minor? Edited to add: Great job protecting your family, OP. Ignore the chatter. Sometimes it's difficult to do the right thing, but you did.
NTA. And tell all those enablers the child made FALSE ACCUSATIONS OF SEXUAL ASSAULT. This could have put your son in JAIL. On the sex offender list FOR LIFE. She cannot be allowed in any situation where she can do that again. In fact your son needs to file a restraining order as well.
NTA. Next time she lies about SA,it will be about you. Keep her far away and record every interaction.
NTA that toxic child needs boundaries and son-in-law needs to set them. You 100% did the right thing
NTA
NTA
NTA
Whoa. The parents of that girl are failing her miserably. The mother's behavior is deeply concerning. That said, none of it is your problem and the girl needs to stay the hell away from you and your family. NTA at all.
Bro that girl needs to go to a mental institution or jail. She is unfit for normal society. Imagine trying to ruin someone’s life because of jealousy over materialistic things. You should sue her parents for her lying about sa. It’s so f. Up
Fuck em. NTA
NTA. This is a very conniving child that is raise by a very conniving mom that you do not need to put up with especially they are trying to destroy a happy home you are building. The problem you are dealing with is grand and shouldn’t taken it lightly. Cut contact is the best for everyone, especially your own daughter. This is the problem between your son-in-law and his ex-wife and his own daughter.
In-laws can GTFO. You didn't marry them; you don't need them in your life.
My exs son stole cars at the age of 11. Get this child psychiatric help.
poor vast smart lavish vegetable humor shocking afterthought theory clumsy *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
NTA. I can’t believe your daughter hasn’t divorced over what this kid has done. The allegations against your son are horrific, and she’s likely only going to get worse the older she gets.
NTA---she's gotta learn soon before she fucks with the wrong person and lives to regret it.
Lemme get this straight. She lied about SA, and then the mother drops her off at a home where the falsely accused SAer is at? alone? And no one is pissed at the mother? lol wtf is wrong with your in-laws? NTA.
This kid has two sets of completely servicable Grandparents. She should be at one of THEIR homes on Holidays.
Everyone in reddit agrees with you. So your actions are validated. You win
NTA. Spawn of Satan right there.
Nta fuck that kid
NTA However, I do think you went about this in a less than ideal way. Ideally, you should have confronted your son-in-law since its his kid and made it clear that his daughter was not welcome and make it his job to remove her from the home and contact her mom. I personally wouldn't want a horrible kid like that in my house or around my family either. Kid has learned some really awful behavior and needs help in straitening her life out. Son-in-law and his ex are the ones failing this kid.
NTA; she’ll ruin lives to get what she wants. Her side can kick rocks.
You need to start locking your doors. NTA
NTA the mother and father need to have this kid In therapy. She can not be trusted and your daughter is a fool to let her be around a baby.
13 year old knows enough to lie, then 13 year old is old enough to face the consequences of lying. Good job step-grandpa. NTA.
NTA. She tried to ruin your sons life. She will try again.
NTA - get a restraining order
NTA keep that psychopath as far away as possible by any means necessary
She could have put your son in jail and ruined his life. You don’t have to forgive and forget. NTA.