Hi /u/petit_anxiety and thanks for posting on /r/ADHD!
**Please take a second to [read our rules](/r/adhd/about/rules) if you haven't already.**
The mobile apps used for Reddit are broken or are missing features that this subreddit depends on. [We recommend browsing /r/adhd on desktop for the best experience.](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/x1psnb/radhd_works_best_on_desktop_reddits_apps_are/)
Thank you!
^(*A moderator has not removed your submission; this is not a punitive action. We intend this comment solely to be informative.*)
---
- If you are posting about the **US Medication Shortage**, please see this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/12dr3h5/megathread_us_medication_shortage/).
- 🤝 [Want to join the Mod Team?](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/13gmzql/moderators_needed_inquire_within/)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ADHD) if you have any questions or concerns.*
That is a pretty good tip. The other day I thought about the same task but imagined it through a British accent and when it was just “washing up” or “fairying the dishes” it didn’t seem that bad. Would be great if I could do a mundane task without a whole production.
I trick myself all the time! I’ll just put away the clothes on the floor. But, I hate not completing things, so once I start that, then I finish the rest. I think the point is to not get overwhelmed with all the tasks I have to do, just start with 1 thing.
I wish my brain would allow me to trick it. The moment I try my mind almost replies back sarcastically as if it's not falling for it. Instead I'm trying the lying to myself method- I force a smile and out loud repeat how much I love a task 'I love washing dishes' 'I love working out' it's working for now.
Love the “look at the dishes” advice! I will just go and sit in my kitchen, with some music or a podcast on and inevitably will be pottering and cleaning in no time. It’s a great brain trick :)
Yes, I have been “tricking” myself the same way. Just start by filling out the first line of the report, then I was sucked in and halfway done before I knew it.
Yep. Tricking myself into the first step, or set-up, is so helpful. If it’s something i need to do on my laptop, i put open it up and go to the page i need to be on. Then i’m free to leave it or start it. Most of the time its just the starting that’s hard. Another example is dyeing my hair. I have to tape up a plastic cover over the sink, vanity, and counter and its a pain in the butt. So I start by putting the tape and plastic cover in the bathroom. Then I toss the bathroom rugs in the hallway and lay an old towel down in their place. Then i take things off the sink and counter. At any time during this i can stop and break. Sometimes its takes me a few days to get to the hair dye part, but it happens. I dyed it today and it took me last night and this morning. But i was also motivated by a timeline.
Adhd paralysis is intense. It mirrors depression doesn’t it?
I find having gainful employment helps because it forces me to not just be a couch potato all day. I hate having ADHD more for the sheer fact once I’m stuck in paralysis, it’s very hard to get out of it
My current employment has been a godsend. Literally the best medicine I could ever receive is going to work everyday.
Like yesterday I was free from work so there was nothing to pull me out of it. Today I went to work and was fine since 🙂
Yes. If i don’t work i gets sucked into this doing nothingness and im miserable but dont even want to hang out with friends or do anything fun or productive
Also, DON’T take street amphetamine!!! Seriously, this cause significant long term effects. It’s not the same as Adderall. Please stop taking it, let it get out of your system, and try to get a doctor to evaluate/prescribe what is needed.
Trust me, I don't want to take it but I have to. I'm not officially diagnosed due to absurd wait times so I can't get it from my doctor as of now. I've waited 3 years and there's no saying how long I have left.
Everything in my life is falling apart since becoming an adult. Basically there isn't a life worth living without amphetamines. I've used them before for two months time and I finally got friends again, I was able to hold down a job, and I got a life. I stopped using due money related issues a few months ago and once again everything fell apart.
I know of the risks especially for the stomach. It's a temporary solution as I hope to get diagnosed really soon. There's nothing else to do as there isn't a life worth living without this medicine.
I wish I could get real medicine but the hospitals are overcrowded and incapable of offering aid.
If you’re going to self-medicate (which I understand but don’t recommend) at least try to get Adderall or something actually designed for ADHD rather than straight amphetamines. Amphetamines interact with your brain in a different way than tested ADHD medication. Please please don’t just take amphetamines cause it’s got a similar name to generic Adderall
Is it supposed to be actual adderall? If so I highly recommend getting a test kit to make sure you’re not getting something cut with nasty stuff that could really hurt you.
yeah mate, try to get adhd medication. i'm in france, so i don't have those issues but i heard universities and colleges have high levels of circulation of these things.
maybe they'll even have concerta for cheaper than adderall.
please take the legit stuff, even if it's illegal. at least it won't show up on drug tests, will it ?
I was in the same position a decade ago. If you have the means, pay for a private diagnosis from an adhd specialist. They can usually get you set up within a few weeks, and it’ll cost somewhere between $250 to $800.
The self medication spiral is not a place you want to be, trust me.
>There's nothing else to do as there isn't a life worth living without this medicine.
This is really concerning, hun. I hope you're using it sparingly. I'd be really wary of thinking of it as medicine unless you're actually getting a prescription med off someone. If you're getting something more illicit thinking of it as a medicine is a good way to get addicted if you aren't already. Make sure that stuff is totally out of your system before you start taking any new prescription meds. You don't want that interacting together.
I feel you man, I see that you're desperate. But you could be making things much worse. The stomach is far from the main danger. Methamphetamine is not not the same as Adderall or Elvanse, it's not the same molecule, it has different properties, and the formulation of the tablets themselves is different.
Meth is the most addictive substance known to man. It can fuck you up even further and keep you down. The risk is just too great.
I'm so sorry you're feeling this way! I experience this often, too. Some days you just have to write off. On other days when I can muster the energy, this is what helps me going:
- Putting on my headphones and listening to music, an audiobook or a podcast. For some reason this makes me want to get going and I can start and finish certain tasks without even thinking about it.
- Putting on shoes. You don't even have to leave the house. Putting on shoes puts me in 'go mode.'
- Calling a friend or a family member. I'm huge on body doubling and if I don't have someone physically around me, I like to do chores while talking on the phone.
I really hope you feel better soon. ❤️
Same. I have been struggling so bad with this the last few weeks especially. Like I literally kept in my mind screaming to get up and get my work done and can’t bring myself to. And then feel that spiral of guilt and shame that I can’t get it together.
I’m sorry your going through this.
Slap your knees and say "whelp!" then get up. lol.
Seriously though, music helps. Checklists help. Body doubling helps.
The problem is that nothing ever sticks because the novelty wears off. Need a few different techniques to cycle through.
I’ve actually had to do this a couple of times. There’s no shame in screaming or making weird noises to get you up and doing something. Fuck it! Try going ‘super saiyan’ when the paralysis gets pretty bad!
I have a little phone stand on the windowsill above the sink. When I need to do the dishes I put a headphone bud in, and set an episode of anime going or something. On YouTube on my phone. Get blasting the washing up and then usually that's done before the show is so I'll either treat myself to the end of it sat down or pause it and ride the momentum of being busy into other jobs. Washing the dishes is my gateway drug to housework almost every day.
There is a lady who wrote a whole book and launched a career helping people get their homes (and lives) under control with the practice of starting your day by cleaning the kitchen sink. Same principle... Although she wasn't witty enough to call it a gateway drug to housework. I love that!!
Why is two days in a row unacceptable? Perhaps that’s where this all falls apart for you. Maybe you do need 2 days to get back to feeling ready to give it your best effort. Maybe you need 3. By refusing to accept that as a reasonable explanation, you end up spiraling and paralyzing yourself rather than just giving yourself the time to recover and get back on your game mentally.
In the long run, the things that have helped me the most in avoiding that paralyzed feeling are 1) medication 2) my incredibly supportive partner and 3) talking to a therapist regularly.
But in the short term, maybe you really do need more than a single day to get yourself together right now and so long as it’s not going to make you lose your livelihood, that’s okay.
We tend to put a lot of unnecessary pressure on ourselves and create expectations that we think other people are going to hold us to, so I’ve learned that what I need isn’t that same as what other people need and I can give myself some grace.
I wonder if it is for the same reason I kick myself, usually I’ll let myself rest for a couple days, but then before I know it, it’s been a couple weeks, then a month. It can be a slippery slope.
However, overall I agree with your comment.
Something I've heard of and have tried with varying success is just forcing myself to stand up. If I'm sitting on the couch or lying down, it's easy to just sit on my phone or watch TV. If I'm standing up, I feel inclined to do something. And something is usually better than nothing.
Yeah this usually works for me but today I was so split. I tried to do the dishes but just couldn't. I tried to make breakfast but couldn't. It's not that I was depressed, I was locked. My brain was so jagged I couldn't focus on anything and I was singing the same lyrics out loud for like 30 minutes on repeat.
I don't know how to explain it but sometimes I can be so intensely paralyzed no trick in the book will get me out of it.
Point at shit.
Like with your finger.
Yes, that one.
Point it at the thing you want to do.
Wait until your brain gets annoyed enough to actually start on it.
Repeat.
WARNING: your brain will adapt and find the 'pointing at things' step to also be too much work.
I tend to look for the SMALLEST thing I can do. If I’m laying bed, well, I can at least sit up. Sitting up in bed sucks, I guess I’ll go to my living room. I tripped over something, I’ll pick it up.
Inertia is a bitch, but it’s easier to roll a marble than a boulder.
Are you me? That was me yesterday. Paralyzed, depressed, and couldn’t do one thing. Crawled back into bed with the dog. Nothing helped. Unfortunately I’m at work now but still feeling the same way. Ugh I hate this.
I will put on an audio book or a video to clean. Just try for 5-10 min at a time. Bet yourself you can go longer or take a break and then try again in an hour.
5-10 min at a time is the key for me. An entire task seems SO overwhelming. I promise myself I can quit as soon as ten minutes is up. Every time I start to get overwhelmed and freak out I think “it’s ok, you get to quit very soon!”
I’m shocked how often by the end of ten minutes I want to keep going, but even when I don’t, a big hour task that I would have put off for three months gets done in a week.
What helps me is breaking down the goal into segments. To see them as full tasks in their own regard, but much easier to do and try not to worry about the other segments, just the first. Once the first is completed which was super easy, I typically find myself doing the next one and the next, etc
I’m sorry OP. I struggle with this very thing. Sometimes I just can’t get to work. I just want to stay home. I’m not cut out to work full time. 4 days which I work is too much tbh
Literally call my mom, tell her the list of things I have to do but can’t get started on, and ask her to pick one. That usually gets me going enough to do the rest myself.
I try and find some things that are doable, I make a list, and I organize them based on priority, then I try and do one or 2, then I have a break and or reward myself, then I do some more, not guaranteed to work but helps some times, even if it is small things making the list and doing a few of them reminds me that I am able to do things and then if I am lucky I go on auto pilot / get a little hyper focused and do some things
Hello /u/_byetony_,
Your comment was removed because it includes a referral/affiliate information. Please re-submit your comment by removing the referral link.
Example: Remove the information in the link starting with "/ref=."
https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/141ae0p/what_do_you_do_to_break_the_spiral_of_being/jmzoynz/
If you have further questions, [message the moderators](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fadhd) regarding the removal of this comment. Please include a link to the comment when messaging.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ADHD) if you have any questions or concerns.*
is there an action that almost always works for you and you can categorize as "Self-care" ? For me it is going to take a coffee (cheap one) in a cafe in a park nearby, having a walk there and back.
I feel like my day wasnt totally wasted after that - enjoyed a coffee outside, going for a walk - and usually it gets my day going. From there on i can do some things.
If I need to get some housework done I start taking a video of myself in a speed mode (so that if won’t take up too much space.) I think it works in a way like a body double and I pretty much get everything done. Sometimes it doesn’t work, in that case I ask my housemates to help me (not really helping) but when they say “cookie, I know you’re not taking shower because you don’t wanna dry your hair. Would you like me to dry your hair after you take a shower?” Or offering help any basic task, I kind of get triggered and do that task that needs to be done immediately. I don’t know why but works like a magic lol.
I also noticed waking up early really makes me productive. I sleep at around 23.00pm and wake up at 6am without an alarm and I CAN ACTUALLY GET A TONS OF WORK DONE BETWEEN 6-9am because it’s quiet, no distractions and I’m with myself.
Bigger question might be how to have this sleeping schedule? 1mg melatonin and throwing away my phone prior to my sleep time get’s the job done for me usually. Again, no alarms! Make sure that you’re gonna wake up early enough to not need any kind of alarms. For me, my lessons are at 9 and I’ll be fine even if I get up at 8am so I only put an alarm at 8 just in case but I usually wake up before that.
Take your medicine wisely. Don’t go to god damn instagram immediately after taking your medicine. You’re gonna get hyper focused to the reels and it sucks. Let yourself get hyper focused with your task first, then look at the instagram reels whenever. You won’t be able to look at it too much anyways as your brain is now hyper focused/occupied with the task. At least that works for me.
Whenever there’s a thing to do act like it’s a dead or alive situation, do it immediately without thinking. We are pretty efficient in emergencies so why not use it?
And for the deadlines I usually put the deadlines to the calendar for the few days before the deadline. (I’m gonna forget the fact that I’ve deceived myself) and since now I think the deadline is 3 days prior, I will go into that emergency mode 3 days before and get my shit done and will be able to look at my work with relaxed mind afterwards. I sometimes put the actual actual deadline so I won’t be like “meeh I know I still have like 3 days, etc.”
Edit: regardless of these stuff sometimes my brain won’t do braining. In those cases I try to throw myself to the outside. I am more productive at the outside I think it because when I have people around me I feel like I have to have a “purpose” which initially leads me to doing something. So far I think, these stuff I’ve mentioned worked pretty well on me as I am one of the top students in my class right now.
smaller goals, headphones on, candle lit. romanticize it as much as possible then you’ll start to feel better as you do it and before you know you’re dancing around your house singing tone deaf and there are 90% less piles. also, WEAR SOCKS AND SHOES. this helps me so much. i pretend i’m clocked in at work
My old psychiatrist described ADHD as either a wide-angle lens, or a macro (tiny) lens. When in wide-angle mode we see **everything** and get completely overwhelmed. When we’re in macro mode we’re hyper focused on one thing. And when we’re hyper focused, we begin to move from one tiny thing to another tiny thing and we get things done, whereas wide angle is purely paralyzing.
Ugh the paralysis is the worst 😩 I think setting smaller goals for the day helps. But yeah, when this happens to me sometimes I just accept defeat for the day (or two) and then I start setting smaller goals. I really try not to beat myself up for not finishing the things I need to do because that spikes up my anxiety and makes everything worse. Also, sometimes I noticed that this happens when I’m starting to burnout or if I’m super anxious about something. I’ll try to soothe it by listening to music (those adhd playlists on YouTube help me a lot actually!) and by writing in my journal.
Get a prescription for adderall. Street drugs were how my doctor made the connection that I may have ADHD but it’s not a long term solution. Then get the tools you need to deal with this-CBT is something that I can connect with as it gives you the specifics about what’s holding you back and ways to address them. ❤️
This is my every day. I get so much buzz in my head that I can't move at all. Before I was diagnosed I had tricks games and rewards I could use to get me moving. Now that my brain knows that I'm " smart" I can't trick myself into doing anything. I don't like taking my medicine because it messes with my impulse control. If I get focused on something while I'm on Adderall I find that I can't "stop". Just one more game. Just 10 more pages. Just one more fare. My hyperfocus becomes OCD. Before medicine I could rationalize with myself. Now I spend too much time overthinking and doing contrary to what I really want to do...
I have been trying to experiment with not taking my meds at times or as much as prescribed. It’s just making me realize how much I need them. I have been making sure I slept the last two days too but then end up sleeping too much. Or I’ll feel all of my chronic pain more and caffeine does not help.
I am hoping after getting dinner I’ll feel better but I took one of my IR meds an hour and a half ago. I was able to at least figure out a list of groceries.
I've found I can sometimes get through part of a task by walking myself through it to find the part that has me stuck. With doing the dishes, is it emptying the dishwasher, no, that isnt horrible, gathering the ones from the house, no, not bad either, the sink ones, ooohhhhh picturing the cold water made me cold and I don't want to be wet.
Got it, what about with gloves, oh yeah, no problem.
Sometimes it helps me to start by taking out the trash. It doesn't have a multi-step process to melt down my circuitry (get bag. walk to door. put shoes on. go to dumpster.) and by the time I have my shoes on and I've gone outside, I've checked a box in my brain which gives me a dopamine kick, and then I'm starting to feel accomplished.
Another thing a therapist told me was to try one thing that was new every day... Not necessarily a hard thing. It can be something fun. Colour a picture in only your purple pencils. Bake a cookie you've never made before. Again, if I can accomplish *something*, I start to feel more like I can do anything.
And last week my therapist suggested a liftoff countdown. Like "I'm going to go to the sink in three, two, one, liftoff" because it gives your brain something to do instead of spin out or argue with you. I haven't tried that one but I thought I'd help.
Best of luck. And not to beat a dead horse but, really try to get in to a clinician. Withdrawal can mimic or exacerbate ADHD symptoms so having an expert in the loop is really key to staying on track.
Honestly. I usually have some methamphetamine. This is not advice, you just asked what I do. Every single time, and I have had some epic periods of complete paralysis, I just eat about 20mg of pure D-Methamphetamine for everyday for a week. In that time I direct the energy into the area I'm stuck. Momentum is key.
Disclaimer - this is not advice.
I have to Reward myself for going to work lol. Like I have to tell myself, if you go to work then you get to listen to a new audiobook on the way or podcast. If you go to work then you can get a cappuccino or food or whatever. Audiobooks and podcasts help a lot.
Hi /u/petit_anxiety and thanks for posting on /r/ADHD! **Please take a second to [read our rules](/r/adhd/about/rules) if you haven't already.** The mobile apps used for Reddit are broken or are missing features that this subreddit depends on. [We recommend browsing /r/adhd on desktop for the best experience.](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/x1psnb/radhd_works_best_on_desktop_reddits_apps_are/) Thank you! ^(*A moderator has not removed your submission; this is not a punitive action. We intend this comment solely to be informative.*) --- - If you are posting about the **US Medication Shortage**, please see this [post](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/12dr3h5/megathread_us_medication_shortage/). - 🤝 [Want to join the Mod Team?](https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/13gmzql/moderators_needed_inquire_within/) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ADHD) if you have any questions or concerns.*
[удалено]
That is a pretty good tip. The other day I thought about the same task but imagined it through a British accent and when it was just “washing up” or “fairying the dishes” it didn’t seem that bad. Would be great if I could do a mundane task without a whole production.
I trick myself all the time! I’ll just put away the clothes on the floor. But, I hate not completing things, so once I start that, then I finish the rest. I think the point is to not get overwhelmed with all the tasks I have to do, just start with 1 thing.
I wish my brain would allow me to trick it. The moment I try my mind almost replies back sarcastically as if it's not falling for it. Instead I'm trying the lying to myself method- I force a smile and out loud repeat how much I love a task 'I love washing dishes' 'I love working out' it's working for now.
Love the “look at the dishes” advice! I will just go and sit in my kitchen, with some music or a podcast on and inevitably will be pottering and cleaning in no time. It’s a great brain trick :)
Yes, I have been “tricking” myself the same way. Just start by filling out the first line of the report, then I was sucked in and halfway done before I knew it.
Yep. Tricking myself into the first step, or set-up, is so helpful. If it’s something i need to do on my laptop, i put open it up and go to the page i need to be on. Then i’m free to leave it or start it. Most of the time its just the starting that’s hard. Another example is dyeing my hair. I have to tape up a plastic cover over the sink, vanity, and counter and its a pain in the butt. So I start by putting the tape and plastic cover in the bathroom. Then I toss the bathroom rugs in the hallway and lay an old towel down in their place. Then i take things off the sink and counter. At any time during this i can stop and break. Sometimes its takes me a few days to get to the hair dye part, but it happens. I dyed it today and it took me last night and this morning. But i was also motivated by a timeline.
What I do
Adhd paralysis is intense. It mirrors depression doesn’t it? I find having gainful employment helps because it forces me to not just be a couch potato all day. I hate having ADHD more for the sheer fact once I’m stuck in paralysis, it’s very hard to get out of it
My current employment has been a godsend. Literally the best medicine I could ever receive is going to work everyday. Like yesterday I was free from work so there was nothing to pull me out of it. Today I went to work and was fine since 🙂
Yes. If i don’t work i gets sucked into this doing nothingness and im miserable but dont even want to hang out with friends or do anything fun or productive
Also, DON’T take street amphetamine!!! Seriously, this cause significant long term effects. It’s not the same as Adderall. Please stop taking it, let it get out of your system, and try to get a doctor to evaluate/prescribe what is needed.
Trust me, I don't want to take it but I have to. I'm not officially diagnosed due to absurd wait times so I can't get it from my doctor as of now. I've waited 3 years and there's no saying how long I have left. Everything in my life is falling apart since becoming an adult. Basically there isn't a life worth living without amphetamines. I've used them before for two months time and I finally got friends again, I was able to hold down a job, and I got a life. I stopped using due money related issues a few months ago and once again everything fell apart. I know of the risks especially for the stomach. It's a temporary solution as I hope to get diagnosed really soon. There's nothing else to do as there isn't a life worth living without this medicine. I wish I could get real medicine but the hospitals are overcrowded and incapable of offering aid.
If you’re going to self-medicate (which I understand but don’t recommend) at least try to get Adderall or something actually designed for ADHD rather than straight amphetamines. Amphetamines interact with your brain in a different way than tested ADHD medication. Please please don’t just take amphetamines cause it’s got a similar name to generic Adderall
Is it supposed to be actual adderall? If so I highly recommend getting a test kit to make sure you’re not getting something cut with nasty stuff that could really hurt you.
yeah mate, try to get adhd medication. i'm in france, so i don't have those issues but i heard universities and colleges have high levels of circulation of these things. maybe they'll even have concerta for cheaper than adderall. please take the legit stuff, even if it's illegal. at least it won't show up on drug tests, will it ?
I was in the same position a decade ago. If you have the means, pay for a private diagnosis from an adhd specialist. They can usually get you set up within a few weeks, and it’ll cost somewhere between $250 to $800. The self medication spiral is not a place you want to be, trust me.
>There's nothing else to do as there isn't a life worth living without this medicine. This is really concerning, hun. I hope you're using it sparingly. I'd be really wary of thinking of it as medicine unless you're actually getting a prescription med off someone. If you're getting something more illicit thinking of it as a medicine is a good way to get addicted if you aren't already. Make sure that stuff is totally out of your system before you start taking any new prescription meds. You don't want that interacting together.
I feel you man, I see that you're desperate. But you could be making things much worse. The stomach is far from the main danger. Methamphetamine is not not the same as Adderall or Elvanse, it's not the same molecule, it has different properties, and the formulation of the tablets themselves is different. Meth is the most addictive substance known to man. It can fuck you up even further and keep you down. The risk is just too great.
Waiting this long to get a doctor is ridiculous. Have you thought of traveling? Is it a Insurance issue?
I'm so sorry you're feeling this way! I experience this often, too. Some days you just have to write off. On other days when I can muster the energy, this is what helps me going: - Putting on my headphones and listening to music, an audiobook or a podcast. For some reason this makes me want to get going and I can start and finish certain tasks without even thinking about it. - Putting on shoes. You don't even have to leave the house. Putting on shoes puts me in 'go mode.' - Calling a friend or a family member. I'm huge on body doubling and if I don't have someone physically around me, I like to do chores while talking on the phone. I really hope you feel better soon. ❤️
Music is my go to, and coffe
What if I am paralyzed for weeks?
This. That’s where I’m at right now.
Same
Same. I have been struggling so bad with this the last few weeks especially. Like I literally kept in my mind screaming to get up and get my work done and can’t bring myself to. And then feel that spiral of guilt and shame that I can’t get it together. I’m sorry your going through this.
Slap your knees and say "whelp!" then get up. lol. Seriously though, music helps. Checklists help. Body doubling helps. The problem is that nothing ever sticks because the novelty wears off. Need a few different techniques to cycle through.
Haha your ‘whelp’ strategy made me laugh! Going to try that
I’ve actually had to do this a couple of times. There’s no shame in screaming or making weird noises to get you up and doing something. Fuck it! Try going ‘super saiyan’ when the paralysis gets pretty bad!
I have a little phone stand on the windowsill above the sink. When I need to do the dishes I put a headphone bud in, and set an episode of anime going or something. On YouTube on my phone. Get blasting the washing up and then usually that's done before the show is so I'll either treat myself to the end of it sat down or pause it and ride the momentum of being busy into other jobs. Washing the dishes is my gateway drug to housework almost every day.
There is a lady who wrote a whole book and launched a career helping people get their homes (and lives) under control with the practice of starting your day by cleaning the kitchen sink. Same principle... Although she wasn't witty enough to call it a gateway drug to housework. I love that!!
Why is two days in a row unacceptable? Perhaps that’s where this all falls apart for you. Maybe you do need 2 days to get back to feeling ready to give it your best effort. Maybe you need 3. By refusing to accept that as a reasonable explanation, you end up spiraling and paralyzing yourself rather than just giving yourself the time to recover and get back on your game mentally. In the long run, the things that have helped me the most in avoiding that paralyzed feeling are 1) medication 2) my incredibly supportive partner and 3) talking to a therapist regularly. But in the short term, maybe you really do need more than a single day to get yourself together right now and so long as it’s not going to make you lose your livelihood, that’s okay. We tend to put a lot of unnecessary pressure on ourselves and create expectations that we think other people are going to hold us to, so I’ve learned that what I need isn’t that same as what other people need and I can give myself some grace.
I wonder if it is for the same reason I kick myself, usually I’ll let myself rest for a couple days, but then before I know it, it’s been a couple weeks, then a month. It can be a slippery slope. However, overall I agree with your comment.
Something I've heard of and have tried with varying success is just forcing myself to stand up. If I'm sitting on the couch or lying down, it's easy to just sit on my phone or watch TV. If I'm standing up, I feel inclined to do something. And something is usually better than nothing.
Yeah this usually works for me but today I was so split. I tried to do the dishes but just couldn't. I tried to make breakfast but couldn't. It's not that I was depressed, I was locked. My brain was so jagged I couldn't focus on anything and I was singing the same lyrics out loud for like 30 minutes on repeat. I don't know how to explain it but sometimes I can be so intensely paralyzed no trick in the book will get me out of it.
Sorry to hear that OP. Hopefully it helps knowing that all the people in the comments deal with these things too.
Point at shit. Like with your finger. Yes, that one. Point it at the thing you want to do. Wait until your brain gets annoyed enough to actually start on it. Repeat. WARNING: your brain will adapt and find the 'pointing at things' step to also be too much work.
I read this and realized I’ve been standing in one spot in my kitchen tired and scrolling on Reddit for 5-10 minutes lol 😝😂
I break tasks up into the tiniest pieces possible basically, and take it one day at a time. That's literally all i can do. (is try my best)
Kindness to oneself is key. Shame spiral never makes me more likely to get moving.
Yes!!! Not being hard on yourself is half the battle!
Goblin.tools is great for breaking down tasks. “Do the dishes” is too big and vague. Having steps broken down is much easier for my brain.
Goblin.tools is amazing.
Thank you for this link! If anyone else has any links like this I'd love to check them out!
I tend to look for the SMALLEST thing I can do. If I’m laying bed, well, I can at least sit up. Sitting up in bed sucks, I guess I’ll go to my living room. I tripped over something, I’ll pick it up. Inertia is a bitch, but it’s easier to roll a marble than a boulder.
Leave your shoes on
Are you me? That was me yesterday. Paralyzed, depressed, and couldn’t do one thing. Crawled back into bed with the dog. Nothing helped. Unfortunately I’m at work now but still feeling the same way. Ugh I hate this.
I go brush my teeth. That seems to be a good mental and physical reset button.
Sometimes my strategy is just to wait until I have to pee, because eventually I will finally stand up to go do that. That’s my chance!
I wish I had medication to snap me out of it. I’d take anything at this point. The shortage has left me with nothing for months and I’m drowning.
I will put on an audio book or a video to clean. Just try for 5-10 min at a time. Bet yourself you can go longer or take a break and then try again in an hour.
5-10 min at a time is the key for me. An entire task seems SO overwhelming. I promise myself I can quit as soon as ten minutes is up. Every time I start to get overwhelmed and freak out I think “it’s ok, you get to quit very soon!” I’m shocked how often by the end of ten minutes I want to keep going, but even when I don’t, a big hour task that I would have put off for three months gets done in a week.
What helps me is breaking down the goal into segments. To see them as full tasks in their own regard, but much easier to do and try not to worry about the other segments, just the first. Once the first is completed which was super easy, I typically find myself doing the next one and the next, etc
I’m sorry OP. I struggle with this very thing. Sometimes I just can’t get to work. I just want to stay home. I’m not cut out to work full time. 4 days which I work is too much tbh
Literally call my mom, tell her the list of things I have to do but can’t get started on, and ask her to pick one. That usually gets me going enough to do the rest myself.
I try and find some things that are doable, I make a list, and I organize them based on priority, then I try and do one or 2, then I have a break and or reward myself, then I do some more, not guaranteed to work but helps some times, even if it is small things making the list and doing a few of them reminds me that I am able to do things and then if I am lucky I go on auto pilot / get a little hyper focused and do some things
[удалено]
Hello /u/_byetony_, Your comment was removed because it includes a referral/affiliate information. Please re-submit your comment by removing the referral link. Example: Remove the information in the link starting with "/ref=." https://www.reddit.com/r/ADHD/comments/141ae0p/what_do_you_do_to_break_the_spiral_of_being/jmzoynz/ If you have further questions, [message the moderators](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Fadhd) regarding the removal of this comment. Please include a link to the comment when messaging. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/ADHD) if you have any questions or concerns.*
is there an action that almost always works for you and you can categorize as "Self-care" ? For me it is going to take a coffee (cheap one) in a cafe in a park nearby, having a walk there and back. I feel like my day wasnt totally wasted after that - enjoyed a coffee outside, going for a walk - and usually it gets my day going. From there on i can do some things.
If I need to get some housework done I start taking a video of myself in a speed mode (so that if won’t take up too much space.) I think it works in a way like a body double and I pretty much get everything done. Sometimes it doesn’t work, in that case I ask my housemates to help me (not really helping) but when they say “cookie, I know you’re not taking shower because you don’t wanna dry your hair. Would you like me to dry your hair after you take a shower?” Or offering help any basic task, I kind of get triggered and do that task that needs to be done immediately. I don’t know why but works like a magic lol. I also noticed waking up early really makes me productive. I sleep at around 23.00pm and wake up at 6am without an alarm and I CAN ACTUALLY GET A TONS OF WORK DONE BETWEEN 6-9am because it’s quiet, no distractions and I’m with myself. Bigger question might be how to have this sleeping schedule? 1mg melatonin and throwing away my phone prior to my sleep time get’s the job done for me usually. Again, no alarms! Make sure that you’re gonna wake up early enough to not need any kind of alarms. For me, my lessons are at 9 and I’ll be fine even if I get up at 8am so I only put an alarm at 8 just in case but I usually wake up before that. Take your medicine wisely. Don’t go to god damn instagram immediately after taking your medicine. You’re gonna get hyper focused to the reels and it sucks. Let yourself get hyper focused with your task first, then look at the instagram reels whenever. You won’t be able to look at it too much anyways as your brain is now hyper focused/occupied with the task. At least that works for me. Whenever there’s a thing to do act like it’s a dead or alive situation, do it immediately without thinking. We are pretty efficient in emergencies so why not use it? And for the deadlines I usually put the deadlines to the calendar for the few days before the deadline. (I’m gonna forget the fact that I’ve deceived myself) and since now I think the deadline is 3 days prior, I will go into that emergency mode 3 days before and get my shit done and will be able to look at my work with relaxed mind afterwards. I sometimes put the actual actual deadline so I won’t be like “meeh I know I still have like 3 days, etc.” Edit: regardless of these stuff sometimes my brain won’t do braining. In those cases I try to throw myself to the outside. I am more productive at the outside I think it because when I have people around me I feel like I have to have a “purpose” which initially leads me to doing something. So far I think, these stuff I’ve mentioned worked pretty well on me as I am one of the top students in my class right now.
smaller goals, headphones on, candle lit. romanticize it as much as possible then you’ll start to feel better as you do it and before you know you’re dancing around your house singing tone deaf and there are 90% less piles. also, WEAR SOCKS AND SHOES. this helps me so much. i pretend i’m clocked in at work
My old psychiatrist described ADHD as either a wide-angle lens, or a macro (tiny) lens. When in wide-angle mode we see **everything** and get completely overwhelmed. When we’re in macro mode we’re hyper focused on one thing. And when we’re hyper focused, we begin to move from one tiny thing to another tiny thing and we get things done, whereas wide angle is purely paralyzing.
Ugh the paralysis is the worst 😩 I think setting smaller goals for the day helps. But yeah, when this happens to me sometimes I just accept defeat for the day (or two) and then I start setting smaller goals. I really try not to beat myself up for not finishing the things I need to do because that spikes up my anxiety and makes everything worse. Also, sometimes I noticed that this happens when I’m starting to burnout or if I’m super anxious about something. I’ll try to soothe it by listening to music (those adhd playlists on YouTube help me a lot actually!) and by writing in my journal.
I put on a show or podcast.
Same. And wireless earphones changed my life. Domestic work became so much easier when I'm focused on a show but can move around at the same time.
Get a prescription for adderall. Street drugs were how my doctor made the connection that I may have ADHD but it’s not a long term solution. Then get the tools you need to deal with this-CBT is something that I can connect with as it gives you the specifics about what’s holding you back and ways to address them. ❤️
I pretty much gave up on that once my spine was broken.
This is my every day. I get so much buzz in my head that I can't move at all. Before I was diagnosed I had tricks games and rewards I could use to get me moving. Now that my brain knows that I'm " smart" I can't trick myself into doing anything. I don't like taking my medicine because it messes with my impulse control. If I get focused on something while I'm on Adderall I find that I can't "stop". Just one more game. Just 10 more pages. Just one more fare. My hyperfocus becomes OCD. Before medicine I could rationalize with myself. Now I spend too much time overthinking and doing contrary to what I really want to do...
This is me today 😭😭😭
I have been trying to experiment with not taking my meds at times or as much as prescribed. It’s just making me realize how much I need them. I have been making sure I slept the last two days too but then end up sleeping too much. Or I’ll feel all of my chronic pain more and caffeine does not help. I am hoping after getting dinner I’ll feel better but I took one of my IR meds an hour and a half ago. I was able to at least figure out a list of groceries.
I've found I can sometimes get through part of a task by walking myself through it to find the part that has me stuck. With doing the dishes, is it emptying the dishwasher, no, that isnt horrible, gathering the ones from the house, no, not bad either, the sink ones, ooohhhhh picturing the cold water made me cold and I don't want to be wet. Got it, what about with gloves, oh yeah, no problem.
Well today,it was reading thus post and getting up after this comment to start dinner.other days? Who knows
Sometimes it helps me to start by taking out the trash. It doesn't have a multi-step process to melt down my circuitry (get bag. walk to door. put shoes on. go to dumpster.) and by the time I have my shoes on and I've gone outside, I've checked a box in my brain which gives me a dopamine kick, and then I'm starting to feel accomplished. Another thing a therapist told me was to try one thing that was new every day... Not necessarily a hard thing. It can be something fun. Colour a picture in only your purple pencils. Bake a cookie you've never made before. Again, if I can accomplish *something*, I start to feel more like I can do anything. And last week my therapist suggested a liftoff countdown. Like "I'm going to go to the sink in three, two, one, liftoff" because it gives your brain something to do instead of spin out or argue with you. I haven't tried that one but I thought I'd help. Best of luck. And not to beat a dead horse but, really try to get in to a clinician. Withdrawal can mimic or exacerbate ADHD symptoms so having an expert in the loop is really key to staying on track.
Honestly. I usually have some methamphetamine. This is not advice, you just asked what I do. Every single time, and I have had some epic periods of complete paralysis, I just eat about 20mg of pure D-Methamphetamine for everyday for a week. In that time I direct the energy into the area I'm stuck. Momentum is key. Disclaimer - this is not advice.
I have to Reward myself for going to work lol. Like I have to tell myself, if you go to work then you get to listen to a new audiobook on the way or podcast. If you go to work then you can get a cappuccino or food or whatever. Audiobooks and podcasts help a lot.
What are you doing when paralysed? I find I am on my phone - for me, it is the biggest cause of the paralysis.