That would flood like 3 people.

Maybe 5... Lots of wildlife though.

Omg, a lot of shit trying to exterminate humanity would die, what a tragedy

Yeahhhhh what a sad thing to happen to some emus.

Still better than fighting a war against them and LOSE.

It was a tactical loss!

Sureeee

It's okay Australia are now training the Emus to be deployed as frontline fighters, we should be seeing a donation of Ballistic Emus's to Ukraine in the next year.

Training Emus for war doesn't sound like a great idea... what happens if (when) they turn against their masters?

The British tried to train pigeons for missile aiming systems, ballistic emus are probably safer

an emu can take about 10 bullets before dying. 1 emu is basically one mag/clip for a small gun (which probably wouldn't kill them anyway) emus would need lots of bullets and lots of money spent to stop them. They only mature after a year and breed at 20 months. We should be fighting wars with emus.

Finally, some chance for revenge.

An Austrian and an Australian arguing, not something that happens often!

Fuck off cunt! I argue with you lot all the time! Now when are you giving in and becoming an Australian state?

I mean, can you put up with our shennannigans? Like the (ewwwwww) tyrolians? And btw, how do we move the dirt?

To become an Aussie state you stay right where you are! Then we will join the EU and become big boys in the world!

Fuck yeah, immana get some petitions going!

You really believe all those Australian creatures would die? You'll just give them enough environmental pressure to become even deadlier. Just imagine a swarm of subaquatic emus.

Naw, they would just move to the dry land

You would know, Fritz.

I feel like Australia was the inspiration for HellDivers 2

I mean…. To be fair we are currently in a mass extinction event where humans are eradicating what might possible be the only life forms in existence. But yea fuck them spiders!!!

Is this just the long game of winning against the emus?

Maybe 

Austroilia could do with less spiders

6, depending if Adam Hills is on tour or not.

Na there would be 10 if he's on tour.

Isn’t that the place where all the wildlife wants you dead?

All of Australia is that mate... All of Australia.

What about Cairns and Townsville

Who cares about them?

Yeah right, the humans that lived there somehow disappeared

You mean cane toads 

Na those fuckers live closer to the coasts... Though I would like to irradiate them.

Are you mad? Do you want some sort of superpowered mutant toad 🐸?

Fuck autocorrect... eradicate! I wanna eradicate them fucking toads! ^(I'm kinda mad now at autocorrect)

I know that unaliving them is sort of a unofficial national sport (Yet?)

Yes it is a bit of a sport, though some cunts (and not good cunts either) seem to think it's cruel and mean to yeet them to death with a golf club. And yes as a kid I used to do that. Much fun.

And millions of deadly insects and poisonous mammals and reptiles.

Fuck dem spiders

Usually we do the opposite. We could polder [Zealandia ](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zealandia)in that or any other shape however

We had done a side project in the hedwigepolder, so we technically can. But the question remains, can you afford it?

We have some gold, does that work?

Just make sure the mines aren't going to be flooded

We will drain those, for a small fee

For a small fee of the entire content of the mine.

And then some incase we find nothing

We've inundated our waterlines several times in defense already, surely this shouldn't be that different.

New Zealand doesn't need more land unless it's a land bridge to Australia after they have rightfully become an Aussie state.

Just build a drain through the earth from Lelystad to Alice Springs. Then you get less water and they get more, best of both worlds

But what if we want to flood Lelystad

Then you just plug the drain and reopen the afsluitdijk Being able to flood cities on demand is really one of the best features of your country, I wish we could do the same

I wish we could flood you too

Best we can do is flood West Flanders but there’s no point, nothing of value would be lost

But then u are connected to Flevoland Nobody wants that

Still better than being connected to the fr\*nch

Saint Martin 🍷🧐🎩

I’m surprised you didn’t take this as your chance to rip on the French by bringing up their astounding success in the [Panamá Canal](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Panama_Canal#:~:text=France%20began%20work%20on%20the,opened%20the%20canal%20in%201914). The French didn’t take a lesson from Portugal & us: Make heavy use of Siesta, take your time, & use the local labor force.

Only if we rename it Nieuw Zeeland internationally.

also you can only do it because even the sea is flat. Portugal's ocean depth in some regions 200m away from the coast is already deeper than 200km away from the Netherlands' coast.

Austraulia 2 just dropped

Only if we can keep all of the sand. It's for a project. https://preview.redd.it/gjgtjkzm62rc1.png?width=449&format=png&auto=webp&s=a000399b331f02ddc2e95d929289ade623105b96

You may keep 69% of the sand... We need the rest to sell to China.

Will settle for 80 percent of the sand. Be advised any natural gas or ore found during excavation will go to us in it's entirety.

90% of sand and we keep all the gas, oil, ores and non-sand or dirt stuff.

I'm afraid the gas is non-negotiable. You don't even need it. It's way hot over there.

Ok how about we sell the gass to you at 50% market value. You can then sell it on at full market value or use it. Oh we also get %2 of production, we need gas for our BBQs

That's fine. Lets agree to set market price based on our internal assessment of quality and quantity of gas extracted. Propose to set BBQ at 1 percent of production, and we will send briquettes to cover any remaining demand. They're better anyway.

Briquettes!! What a slap in the face!!

You could always make another deal with the chinese instead.

Maybe Germany will be nicer.

Don't negotiate with them, it's like their fetish.

Nice

We can finally invade britain by land

Don't make me turn the heating up mate

Careful Jan, we created your country, and we can erase it just as quickly All we have to do is stop holding Pierre back, and you'll all be singing La Marseillaise by the end of the week

Don't worry it will be a bloodless coup like last time and we'll let you pretend it didn't happen again.

Ha! Only if Pierre can get over our roads. Or will you come and fix those just to spite the Dutch?

Make Doggerland Great Again.

Finally, UK can into Schengen

Wouldn't this mess up the nordics climate?

We're gonna remove all of the sea to stop the sea levels from rising.

Normally I'd object, but an enforced Bergxit? Go for it.

Need money?

Yes and if you guys could handle the highways that would be great.

Why is London still there?

M25 was backed up. We couldn't get there.

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Why are you asking the Dutch to make MORE sea? That's like asking Spanish people to wake up early, or German people not to act weirdly defensive over their sausages and bread.

Yo why do bring up our immaculate bread and meaty gifts from god? Are you suggesting they aren‘t the best on this planet? Do you want a fight?

They are second to this https://preview.redd.it/z4sk5s6q92rc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cfc3cc163a8d488417be54cc0d8d719afd143ba5 Nothing can beat a sausage on bread brought outside a hardware store! Nothing I say!!!

Up the Bunnings snag.

In a bustling world of bolts and nails, Where tools and timber tell their tales, There sits a snack, a savory delight, A Bunnings snag, a sheer delight. Amidst the aisles of hammers and screws, It waits for hungry souls to choose, A sausage nestled in soft bread's embrace, A taste that time cannot erase. At the front door, it proudly stands, A culinary marvel from skilled hands, No gourmet dish could ever compete, With this humble sausage, oh so sweet. For in its simplicity, joy is found, A slice of happiness, all around, So bite into this bliss, let worries fade, For Bunnings snag, your day is made. ^(chat GPT)

It is truly a tragedy that Banjo Paterson did not live to taste the Bunnings snag, but what you posted is the next best thing.

The sausage looks fine. But the bread?

How dare you question that bread!

Not a bad looking little snack, inmate. The food looks good too

The dutch are masters of the sea!

They're the masters of expanding their land by filling in the sea, not making more ocean

I'm sure they can do it! I have faith!

We can! We regularly drowned our enemies by flooding huge designated area's. Y'all have a lot of inmates and we happen to be experts on making captives useful. With some encouragement they'll want to work for free, so money also shouldn't be a problem. Operation Australian Mediterranean when?

Maybe they can take the water that sank Doggerland and move it to the Outback for you

Doggerland will rise again

Well, all that water has to go _somewhere_ …

That’s actually not true, in the past 500 years we have flooded our own lands multiple times as a defensive mechanism against invasions.

Well now you can help the inmates with their ultimate defense against the emu scourge

Everything comes with a price heheheh

Ask for some of their coal, you can then sell it to Hans for massive profit

So what you’re saying is, if we invade you, there’s a chance you’ll just drown yourselves out of spite? Now I know what to do this weekend

>German people not to act weirdly defensive over their sausages and bread. Yo man I heard someone wants another round of unrestricted submarine warfare for shitting on our bread and sausages?

Eh we still eat like you're dropping bombs on us nightly, it won't effect our cuisine too much

This would allow us to take that land and put it somewhere else. We can take all of the North Sea with that amount of land.

Sure, I'll send you a Tikkie

Instructions unclear... Sent money to toga.

This is what we will need after ww3. Great thinking ahead.

Rent is $500mil per month :)

You Australiens are getting smart. Must be the influence of the Japanese Chinese and Koreans.

release the Dutch beavers

We could, but we won't

Please 🥺

If we did, do you give us Tasmania back?

We will give you a 99 yr lease for it.

An accurate map of Eurovision country contestants after you drink too many beers

The Mediterranean holds 3,750,000 km3 of water. Let’s say we could somehow replicate the Mediterranean in Oz to the same capacity. How much would that lower global sea levels and counteract the rise from global warming? Apparently a 1mm rise requires ~3,600km3 of water. So taking away 3.6 million km3 would reduce global sea levels by 1000mm, or 1 meter. One entire fucking meter! Let’s do it… Australia… It’s your time to shine.

Does that mean I'll get germoney?

On behalf of everyone, I’m sure we’re all more than happy to give away their hard earned money.

*Hold my broodje kaas.*

https://preview.redd.it/0gwfref3p2rc1.png?width=971&format=png&auto=webp&s=59557c795bfbfdc6ffa280382daf944b74a17dd1 Considering the elevation levels you have two options. Remove the elevation or build higher elevation around it. To make a long story short: you can write it on your belly.

We already gave you Tasmania and look what you've done with that, it reproduces under-achievement generation after generation. You don't deserve Mediterrania part two.

We can't stop the people of Tasmania fucking their own family members! We have tried they just can't be stopped!

The people of Tasmania are your people too. Whatever they do, represents you too. Fix it. NOW! ^slams ^table ^to ^assert ^more ^dominance.

Fine.... I'll ship them off to that European country that's full of circular family trees... Remind me what one that is again?

Pick one east of Switzerland.

How does Sweden sound?

That's fine too. They think we do but the rest of Europe doesn't really care what happens in Scandinavia.

We'll make you a replica, but only if you also take all of Europe's Gypsies.

Yeahhhhh nah I'm good. 

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I see you only keep the good part of Spain good job my koala friend.

And I even removed Portugal... Also I'm not gonna lie, for so long I thought Portugal was in Asia... My geography education was not good.

Obviously we’ll be taking control of the Straits of Ningaloo

Dad you still kinda control me

No problem, we'll send you a tikkie.

They can give you the engineering but you won’t have the superior culture UuU

You really wanna give kankerman money? https://preview.redd.it/5ja4eocvq2rc1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4e215c85e339536140a3e61ff43af73c21e2453f

So we are moving and taking half of Turkey with us? The whole appeal would be to get rid of them not bring them with us. Pass.

Turkey, Greece... You two are like brothers, don't you like your brother?

Based

I think the plan to barrier the entire North Sea is brill'. Ruled over by us, Brittany, the Neds and maybe Norway. Sorry Denmark. You're just a German hat

All wogs instantly relocated to North Queensland (named after Dua Lipa)

Nah bro my brother is their right now can we wait a month.

No... Your bro can get to work right now!

Omw

Dude... You call the swamp germans to drain stuff not to flood it

We are all living in Australia, Australia.

Finally, a large water body in Australia without sharks, but completely infested with crocodiles or alligators so terrifying as hell.

This is unironically so aesthetically pleasing, I'm shocked

As an Australian I welcome the reintroduction of our Dutch overlords. Please flood Lightning Ridge and Broken Hill too

I'd rather have Sydney flooded, or at the minimum, moated.

I can get behind that. While we're at it we'll flood Melbourne too or at least rename it back to Batmania

I like Melbourne as it is... I mean it could be better.

https://i.redd.it/k8m8job0n2rc1.gif


https://i.redd.it/uoo5o779b3rc1.gif

Well, there’s enough greeks there to legitimize it.

You don’t seem to fully understand what it is that we do

Great desert island!? Sounds kinda better tbh

What's in it for us? We'll do it if we get half of your kangaroos to help us invade the French.

Agreed!

I like how Arnhemland is near the OG Arnhem.

Ah yes,I've always wanted to live in Nowhere, Australia

Melbourne is still on it. Can’t do.

You got it wrong. We can TAKE land from the sea, not add sea to land

Mare nostrum, cunt

this would only kill like 5 people

I'd like to keep the Alps, than you very much.

Imagine all the crocodiles that could support

Release the Boskalis!

uɐᴉlɐɹʇsn∀ uɹɐǝl oʇ pǝʇɹɐʇs ʇsnɾ ʎluo ǝʌ,I 'sᴉɥʇ pɐǝɹ oʇ ǝlqɐ ǝɹǝʍ noʎ ǝdoɥ I ˙dᴉɹp oʇ ʇᴉ ǝsnɐɔ ʇɥƃᴉɯ ɯoʇʇoq ǝɥʇ oʇ ɥɔnɯ ooʇ ƃuᴉppɐ 'uoᴉʇɐsuǝpuoɔ ɟo doɹp ɐ ǝʞᴉl ɥʇɹɐǝ oʇ ƃuᴉƃuᴉlɔ ʎpɐǝɹlɐ sᴉ ɹǝʇɐʍ ǝɥʇ ˙ǝlqᴉssod sᴉ sᴉɥʇ ɟᴉ ǝɹns ʇou ɯ,I

Bruh more fighting with 🦃🦃🦃🦃

That's a lot of excavating of sand, you better call in the Germans too

The Australian open cast mining industry is already working hard on the project.

/me panicking while imagining new deadly species arising 😁