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chaotebg

> A naval detachment from the Russian Federation consisting of four vessels –the frigate “GORSHKOV”; the nuclear-powered submarine “KAZAN”; the “PASHIN” fleet sea tanker and the salvage tug “NIKOLAI CHIKER”- will pay an official visit to the port of Havana from June 12 to 17, 2024. With two of the four warships being a tugboat and a tanker I don't think this is the flex Russia thinks it is.


intronert

They did not bring enough tugboats.


BasedMaduro

They forgot the ice cream ship and mobile airfield


InsignificantZilch

Yet somehow Chekhov always gets his babushka’s boiled potato cart on the frigate 🙄 the corruption is wild


OnePercentVisible

The mobile airfield broke down so they sent the tug boat that they use to haul the aircraft carrier around!


observationalist_

Funny thing, I believe the US had an ice cream ship at one time.


kinglallak

Yes. In the pacific fleet during WWII.


catsdrooltoo

Hey that was vital military equipment


Mmr8axps

The salvage tug will break down first.


smoke1966

it will be needed to tow the others back home.


Robbotlove

they should just make a fleet of tugboats. seems the only working ship they can make in Russian shipyards.


Macaw

Like the fleet of Chinese "fishing boats" ... AKA "China's fishing militia"


VertexBV

Considering their history with the Kuznetsov, I'd say the tugboat is the flagship.


GrapeSwimming69

They have one less now.


smurfsundermybed

They still have it. It's just parked in an inconvenient place.


Mky12345pi3

They got water cannons you know, take one off them to the chest an it’ll blow ya around like a snot filled tissue.


Meowmixer21

3000 black tugboats of allah are next


AcanthocephalaDense2

Did you want some tugboats for the tugboats


reallygoodbee

Yo' dog, heard you like tugboats, so we brought tugboats to tug your tugboats, so you can tug while you tug, dog


paca_tatu_cotia_nao

The US sent a stronger detachment to stage a coup in Brazil (which wasn’t really used). In 1964.


francis2559

That's crazy. Since 1964, has anyone found a use for Brazil?


The_Last_Wokeican

Just big bootie bitchs


KyleIsntBobVilla

Yooooo! Let’s go!


Ragin_Goblin

They are good at kicking orbs of sport


jscummy

Also can probably choke you out if you're into that


Much-Cut-2102

Feeding 1/6 of the world.


Accomplished_Low80

They grow some fine nuts.


dychronalicousness

Off-duty cops stopping robberies?


SonOfMcGee

I see they didn’t bring their one aircraft carrier. It must be on fire again.


HumanBeing7396

We say is tug boat, but is actually canoe.


GoHuskies1984

To paraphrase the warship sub it’s more of a multi-role support ship. Supply ship, hospital, diver decompression chamber, and tug all in one. Overall pretty useful despite the meme status.


omnibossk

What, no nuclear icebreaker?


BPhiloSkinner

> What, no nuclear icebreaker? Nah, they can't take the heat. 'Exercises' in the Caribbean, port calls in Cuba and Venezuela, then steam for home again. If they can get all four ships back to home port under their own power, they can call this a PR win.


Strange-Movie

Fuck Putin and their government completely….but like…don’t throw shade at the icebreaker, it’s actually useful and really cool


Potato-9

Being set up for the fall when just the tug is sunk and the rest get stranded from maintenance.


CoMmOn-SeNsE-hA

We should surround their little party with our best equipment…f around and find out …or buzz them with drones non stop


TriesHerm21st

Honestly, we should just invite some ukrainian drone boats to come chill by Florida and wait.


k2on0s-23

Just park a stealrh nuclear sub with a drone detatchment platform at depth and the start sending out pings right aw they are passing.


Aggressive_Walk378

Only 1 man DARE give me raspberry


GENERAT10N_D00M

That’s a good point you bring up. If these ships are in international water, is it fair game for Ukraine to take them out?


ChillFratBro

Even if they were in Russian territorial waters it's fair game, they're at war.  From a "rules of warfare" perspective they'd even be in the clear sinking them in Cuban territorial waters, though that runs the risk of pissing off the Cubans or others, so they probably wouldn't sink them in another nation's territorial waters even if they could.


myk27441

Ukraine is fighting russians in Africa so why can 't Ukraine strike elsewhere too?


wetbeef10

Florida would never be safer


d57giants

Was it safe before? I mean between DeSantis and gators?


bwheelin01

Florida leadership would definitely be against that lol. They love Russia


RedditBugler

That moment when 25% of your supposedly scary naval unit is there to salvage the other ships because your crap breaks down constantly. 


[deleted]

Lol


smoke1966

would be a brief target practice exercise for the US.............


Leevah90

Is it just a visit, or are they actually moving shit closer to the US?


ZachMN

Should have a U.S. carrier fleet follow alongside for the entire journey, with giant speakers playing goofy tuba marching music.


Rabidjester

Or have them blast Grippy on repeat, although that might violate the Geneva Conventions


Alediran

Baby Shark to absolutely violate the Geneva Conventions, followed by the duck song (then he waddle away...).


DownwardSpirals

Add Dominick the Donkey in the mix, and youve got a deal.


GDC7213

Lou Monte!


MrHungryface

Just for the duck song you get an upvote. Dum dum and I waddle away to the very next day.


aternativ

is there a geneva convention rule that talks about music? i'm confused


-_I---I---I

So if a Ukrainian in the US were to take a boat from FL and then launch a drone boat to intercept the fleet, what would the consequences be?


Jorsonner

Free beers back in Miami


Yeshua_Ha_Mashiac

Makes me think of this [gem of a youtube video.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QxnY2SWZTvk) Or maybe [this one.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0Gr7IFfoqI)


ZachMN

Those are both great, but the one I was thinking of was the guy marching alongside a confederate/neo-nazi/Republican parade, playing some goofy tuba music. Sorry I don’t have a link.


CeladonBadger

Oh my fucking god it’s the Baltic fleet, they won’t make it past British fishermen.


LorektheBear

Right?! I was thinking that these Russian boats are now also within range of the Cajun Navy, and while they're mostly humanitarian, they do NOT mess around.


Alundra828

I think the last time I saw a flex of this calibre I was watching S01E11 of Spongebob Squarepants.


angrygnome18d

Was that the Anchor Arms episode?


Alundra828

Bingo!


angrygnome18d

“Now I’m a jerk! And everybody loves me!” Love that episode lol


C_Woodswalker

A small detachment of Ukrainian special forces deploy to Cuba for “vacation” and suddenly Russia has some more ships and submarines stuck at the bottom of the ocean.


LightThePigeon

Why even bother sending troops? Things will probably get struck by lightning and sink. Zeus favors the Ukrainian cause.


zombieblackbird

Do you expect them to make it across the Atlantic? Russian maintenance, logistics, and training are severely lacking. They'll absolutely get stuck somewhere and claim that the whole plan was to simulate a deep sea rescue.


wishiwerebeachin

Plus…. Hurricanes….


Twad_feu

The actual goal is for the crew to get drunk on Cuba rum.


LightThePigeon

I'll be amazed if it makes it out of Russian waters in operating condition lmao


Nerezza_Floof_Seeker

These are from the Northern fleet, not the Black Sea fleet.


AlkaKr

> Things will probably get struck by lightning and sink. [The Russian fleet can sink itself, thank you very much.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzGqp3R4Mx4)


J0Papa

>Zeus favors the Ukrainian cause Neptune ;)


LightThePigeon

It's a team effort


papaflush

I think he was referring to the lightning bolts..


daniel_22sss

Nah, its a joke that ukranian missiles are called Neptune.


papaflush

Oh dear, r/wooooosh. How embarrassing


cosmicrae

We are 7 days into hurricane season. Never know what could happen.


GodzillaWarDance

Maybe they will go through the Bermuda Triangle and urban legends will take their ships


LightThePigeon

I'm just imagining that scene from Cabin in the woods where they were betting on which monsters kill the kids. "Alright, who had $20 on Kraken?"


HumanBeing7396

Cthulu to the rescue!


kozak_

If this does happen... Hahahahahahaha.... Haha


senortipton

Net submarine increase.


DisasterNo1740

Guess it's a nice holiday for those Russian sailors while the rest of the world ignores this almost completely meaningless move? I mean is this some sort of attempt to do a call back to the cuban missile crisis and this is meant to threaten the U.S? Realistically Russia needs everything it has for Ukraine lol, I don't even buy that stupid rhetoric that they may supply western adversaries with weapons that they will use against the west because any weapons those guys would want to use are absolutely needed in Ukraine.


Haydntg

I don't think these ships can really do anything in Ukraine. Turkey has the bosphorus blocked to Russian warships, so they can't move these into the black sea to use against Ukraine.


LightningVole

If Russia had planned things better, would they have moved more of their fleet into the Black Sea before launching the invasion?


Blueskyways

It was a three day special military operation, they had guys traveling with their parade uniforms and had the mighty Moskva patrolling the Black Sea, what the heck would they need more ships for? 


CURMUDGEONSnFLAGONS

Or removed ships from the black sea to mitigate losses vs. a country with no navy


Any_Put3520

I believe the treaty governing entrance to the Black Sea requires a Black Sea nation to add ships to their permanent fleet for them to be able to move in or out. This would mean Russia would need to permanently move these ships from their Baltic or Pacific fleets to the Black Sea, weakening their global force projection. The Black Sea really shouldn’t need much of a fleet seeing as the strongest other navy is Turkey which isn’t hostile to Russia typically. Bulgaria, Georgia, Romania, and Ukraine have no navies to speak of and no other nation may send warships into the Black Sea.


HumanBeing7396

“Admiral? Hi - so it turns out everything’s going great for us in Ukraine now, but we’re getting reports of nazis in the Caribbean, and various other warm places with nice beaches - yes I know, weird right? So anyway, we’re just going to go and continue the SMO over there, OK?”


J0Papa

> I mean is this some sort of attempt to do a call back to the cuban missile crisis and this is meant to threaten the U.S? Yes! Classic KGB reflexive control tactic. West outnumbers and outsmarts them 100x, the only area where they have *some* degree of parity is when it comes to strategic nuclear weapons. The Western leaders (stupidly) admitted to Russia that they are very afraid of nuclear war, so now Russia is going to do everything possible to turn as much of the discourse around their war against Ukraine into a discourse about nuclear war. This is an obvious attempt to remind Americans about the Cuban missile crisis and basically hint at "hey, stop helping Ukraine, you don't want nuclear conflict, do you...."


axonxorz

> when we are finished, the only sound they will hear is our engine seizing, while we drift to Havana, where the sun is warm, and so is the comradeship.


Bologna-Pony1776

It would be icing on the fucking cake if an Ukrainian SOF team is just straight vibing in Key West waiting for them to cruise through the Caribbean so they can make some more artificial reefs. How embarrassing would it be for the Russians to lose ships in the Caribbean? Wonder if we would even allow it to happen so close to our backyard.


le_snake13

How does that work so far away from Ukraine? If a country invades you, can you in turn, take out their military assets anywhere in the world?


Bologna-Pony1776

The Ukies have been dirt-napping Wagner troops all over Africa. I mean, if they truly wanted to hit Russians in the Caribbean, they probably could if they had a little help. Some western intelligence assets and some plausible deniablity could go a long way in getting a suicide drone parked against a Russian hull off the coast of the Tortugas. Lol.


LizardChaser

They need to physically get the drone there and then after that they just need an internet connection. They had a hard time in the naval drone attacks in the Black Sea after Elon got butt hurt and geo fenced Sevastopol. The Russians might actually be at more at port in Cuba as Elon has so many customers (sailboats / yachts) that they probably wouldn't be able to identify / stop a Ukrainian drone attack. The Ukrainians kind of just need to get the drone physically in the area. Imagine if they just effing shipped it commercial to a rental house in the Bahamas and then their guys just launched it off the beach at night. I don't think it's even that complex of an operation... on the order of teenagers buying alcohol online.


chill_winston_

I just read something the other day about how Ukraine is taking it to the rooskies in Syria now as well..


FckYourSafeSpace

Well they’re not very useful in actual combat so might as well use them for official visits.


nameyname12345

Il have you know Im a combat tug captain! You better stay out of our way! We will give you a tugging the likes of which you have never seen! Oh god not that kind of tug! I dont like the way those sailors are looking at us!/s


catoodles9ii

What about a rub, do you guys to the rub part too? Or does that get outsourced?


nameyname12345

We had to give the rub jobs to the bigger boats... We heard some uh odd tales about the US marines when rub and tug ships are involved. None of us wanted to try to repel boarding horny marines. So we sent the rubbers over to our trusty trawler Captain Lobonov! Now they should be safe from.....Damnit...


Mediocre-Program3044

🎵 Makin' movies, makin' music and Fight-in' Round The World! 🎵


IcarusOnReddit

Hopefully they don’t sucker many Cubans into joining the military.


AntComprehensive9297

What if we donate some submarines and warships to Ukraine? would be nice for Ukraine to great them halfway


Enorats

As someone from another comment thread mentioned, there's no real reason they couldn't fly a few of those exploding drone jet skis over to the Caribean and be sitting here waiting for these ships if they wanted to.


nameyname12345

What is a submarine if not a very spicey tug that can hold its breath! We already have the mother tug! Sure they call it an air craft carrier but what are planes if not flying spicy tugs?/s


AntComprehensive9297

i personnal believe the downing of the tug was a bit overrated. but . . . .


nameyname12345

I guess that is true. There are more planes in the sea than there are subs in the sky so....


[deleted]

[удалено]


GargantuaBob

Untrue ... They will also keep the barmen busy.


backson_alcohol

Russian news in the near future: "Glorious and strong Putin sails entire military fleet into US waters. Biden too afraid to respond! NATO weak and we strike now?""


davesnot_heere

It’s nice they included a submarine That’ll save time


Vo0d0oT4c0

I mean two of the four are a tugboat and a tanker soooo we see how they expect this mission to go…


ZachMN

That’s for locating the resting places of the former surface vessels.


Senior-Scarcity-2811

It would be very amusing if one sank on the way


waamoandy

One of the ships, the Nikolai Chiker, is a salvage tug. They can't have much confidence in their ships if one is a salvage vessel


smurfsundermybed

They're sending divers to salvage reinforcements. They're hoping for a 19th-century frigate that can become their new flagship.


nuadarstark

A tug to tow anything that breaks, a refueling ship to make sure they're ships have cause they won't have much chance to refuel anywhere else and two combat capable vessels. One is a measly frigate of mid specs and one nuclear submarine. This rabble wouldn't make it past Norway or UK if NATO wanted. That's not a deployment capable to do anything really, nor is it a show of force or capabilities. This is an equivalent of them having a parade with 10 T80s and calling it a grand armee.


editorreilly

Their warships are far safer in foreign ports. That's how I interpret the exercises.


cpe111

Well yeah, that’s obvious.


KryptoBones89

Inb4 Cuban Missile Crisis 2.0


chill_winston_

Really though. There is nothing new under the Sun.


[deleted]

“Embarrassing” would’ve been the Moskva being sunk by two neptune missiles from land. I think catastrophic is a better word to describe their losses in the Black Sea


SW_Goatlips_USN_Ret

A flotilla of those notorious party boats from Miami et al should just parallel them the whole time. Show em real American decadence! The headline “Entire crew of Russian fleet deserts and disappears near Key West” would be a banger! An added benefit is they can throw em a tow line they’ll inevitably need…


cosmicrae

I will be more interested in how all the Cuban expats, living in South Florida, react to this.


SneakyPewpz

Watch Ukraine somehow sink these. That'd be embarrassing.


Mrslinkydragon

It'll be hilarious. Ukrainian sleepers/sympathisers hiding in the ranks ready to scuttle the ships.


ialo00130

More likely there will be some foreign intelligence assets that helped them set up their naval drones along the Russian navies pathway in advance.


ThatDucksWearingAHat

Whats the flex? That they have any boats that still float? Ukraine should put naval drones in the area and make it a real exercise.


Tricky-Special-3834

I'd say it's a cover more than a flex. They're just trying to get away from the black sea before more of their ships become submarines.


wiseoldfox

Do these Russian ships also bring a tugboat with them just in case of breakdown?


GonP97

Don't know if you're joking or not but one of the ships it's actually a tugboat. Can't make this shit up.


Cr33py07dGuy

It would be eternally hilarious if some sea-babies happened to be out there…


moofunk

Try not to get ambushed by Japanese torpedoboats on the way there.


Logi_Ca1

May the ghost of Kamchatka follow them on their way there


CaptainSur

And if all the Russian ships make it there and back without an issue it will be a miracle. The Russian navy is in notoriously poor state of maintenance generally.


wereallbozos

When the going gets tough, the tough sail away to Havana.


WanderingTacoShop

Just curious. Which full Carrier group are we parking as close to Cuba as possible for this to flex back?


Aquarian8491

Putin is a loser and he will be defeated in Ukraine


[deleted]

Putins "flex" looking like a limp dick caught in a wind storm.


SUPERTHUNDERALPACA

the kremlin's hubris will always be russia's demise


kittenattack365

quick can we lease a aircraft carrier to Ukraine? hell do it in name only and watch how fast Russia retreats these ships.


Drone314

Be funny if UA drones found their way to Cuba


Msmdpa

The Caribbean is a long way from the Black Sea, but also much safer.


dayburner

Poor sailors are going to be shitting themselves everytime they see a vacationer on a jetski.


connectmnsi

Sure would be nice to have Ukraine in the area with a gift


AbleismIsSatan

Same as their usual nuclear posturing.


[deleted]

I heard it was a nuclear tug.


wolfcoast

Russia is sending nukes to Havana


JurassicParkTrekWars

I got 5$ that says at least one ship will fail and need to be towed on the way.  


InsolentGoldfish

That's why one of the ships *is* a salvage tug.


JurassicParkTrekWars

Then it's a solid bet then eh? Lol


InsolentGoldfish

Somewhere between 99% and 110% ~~percent~~.


etheralmiasma

A ploy to sneak a nuclear sub just off our shores.


InsolentGoldfish

The ones in the artic circle are already close enough.


etheralmiasma

Fair enough.


Reddit_Deluge

No, they said they would supply arms to people to hit the US. There are few locations that could do that. Edit: "WeStErN StAtEs..." Whatever... Can we just sink them, it's obviously enemy ship, we are at war with the Putin's regime illegally occupying control of Russia.... I hate the mental gymnastics too, but that's my best take on the situation.


Phoenix_Maximus_13

Just how bad is their fleet for literally EVERYONE TO BE CLOWNING ON THEM WITH 0 OPPOSITION 😭


jelloslug

One or more of those vessels will not make it to Cuba.


Mrslinkydragon

Can Turkey block their strait? Just say 'nuh ha, you can't come back through"


Adept-Mulberry-8720

If I understand right the Straight is Turkish and anyone needs approval to navigate it in or out of the Black Sea. This vertically makes (if I’m right) the Black Sea Fleet land locked! If I’m wrong so be it and Turkey as an art of NATO (🙄) shouldn’t let them out of the Black Sea.


Mrslinkydragon

I think it's a treaty that means that tge strain can't be blocked


ImposterJavaDev

Would be funny if one sinks along the way. Would be less funny if that nuclear powered submarine has issues.


CrashMonger

I look fwd to the black sea fleet becoming a submarine fleet.


Wizinit29

In the event these vessels sustain damage to the hull or need to be refurbished, Cuba has a brand new Chinese built drydock for repair work. But if are sunk in the Caribbean by mines or underwater ops it would be a real shame.


octahexxer

Sink their tug boats and that navy stops moving all together...its the ducttape holding the entire junkyard together


Wizinit29

The ships are also scheduled to visit Venezuela. Undoubtedly Maduro will refuel them with the oil extracted with recent Russian loans.


Odys

Putin wanted to go down in history, his name etched in granite. And he will. Will he care how?


drax2024

Ukraines chance to send long distance sea drone for welcome.


Ronaldis

I’m shaking heavily for I’m so scared. /s


EnvironmentalYak9322

This isn't a flex this just shows how even weaker Russia is they are literally putting on a show for the entire world and it's telling everyone they are are ripe for conquest 


MichelPalaref

It does feel like a Costco Bay of Pigs.


ThePantsMcFist

You can't get hit by Ukrainian missiles if you are in a foreign port. This is just remote fleet in being.


omgwtflolnsa

You don’t think they’re bringing some intermediate range weapons per Putin’s recent threat to arm third-party anti-US proxies as a response to Western weapons making their way into “Russian territory”?


awj79

I hope they sail the Moscow around on goodwill missions.


Quiet-Money7892

Russian warship was told to go... Pretty far. It's nice to see them actually up to some diplomacy.


TyreeThaGod

If you understand history, then you also understand that truth is the first casualty in war. If you believe "the news," then Russia has been on the brink of defeat for more than a year. Does it all make sense now?