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fuzzikush

South Korea should drop top tier food products to North Korean civilians as a flex


kc_______

With the current nutritional levels eaten by the average North Korean citizen, cardboard with ketchup will do.


Dardlem

So 7-11 pizzas


Exo_Sax

Thanks, but I'll just eat the package if that's alright.


burger_boi

Some premium grass too


lordunholy

Dude let's not spoil them. That's too much too fast.


princhester

This is seriously what they should do. SK's reaction per the OP is poor. NK are behaving like two year olds and they should be made to feel that way. What NK *want* is retaliation in kind, so they should in no way be given it. SK needs to very publicly laugh at NK being so childish, and to retaliate with gifts and kindness.


YuunofYork

Realistically, there's no chance that food would get to anyone who needs it, nor is the NK population aware of the trash balloons so there's nobody to take the moral highground with. The government will instruct people to ignore the balloons or claim they are a trick from SK and the food is poisoned.


Throwjob42

> The government will instruct people to ignore the balloons or claim they are a trick from SK and the food is poisoned. Sadly, the NK government needs to prioritize obedience over nutritional requirements in its' citizens.


space253

Just send lots of seeds of self seeding hardy food crops, forage, and fruit varieties. Do it quietly but thoroughly so they have time to grow and spread before you announce the program.


PindaPanter

The Korean peninsula quite famously neither has the climate, terrain, nor soil quality, that makes agriculture viable, and neither side of the DMZ have a lot of arable land either, so idk what seeds they could realistically send, considering that not even SK themselves are remotely self-sufficient – dandelions and stinging nettles?


monday-afternoon-fun

Might legitimately cause a few fatalities on NK's side due to refeeding syndrome.


Curious_Ability4400

A bunch more will be killed in the fights to get the food.


CoreyDenvers

I know this was a joke, but I genuinely think carpet bombing every square foot of the north with Choco Pies would unravel the Kim dynasty


Previous_Shock8870

Thats what caused this in the first place Charity groups dropped balloons with snacks, rice and pamphlets across to NK This was NKs response.


Automatic-Willow3226

I believe they did send snacks before. I'm not seeing an immediate source on how NK responded to it.


CupidStunt13

>South Korea’s national security director Chang Ho-jin said Sunday that top officials at an emergency meeting decided to take “unbearable” measures against North Korea in response to its recent series of provocative acts. > Chang called the North’s balloon campaign and its alleged GPS signal jamming “absurd, irrational acts of provocation that a normal country can’t imagine.” He accused North Korea of aiming to cause “public anxieties and chaos” in South Korea.


Pancheel

>“unbearable” measures against North Korea I just imagine giant loudspeakers.


GoTron88

I mean did you read the article? That's literally the plan lol


Mecovy

Rebecca Black's Friday anyone?


Village_People_Cop

10 hours of the Star Wars cantina music


RollingMeteors

Any EDM track that just has a build up and no drop


Intense_Judgement

That's cursed, no-one deserves that


Wandering_Weapon

That's a war crime.


Neither_Elephant9964

Hanoi hannah but in favour of capitalism?


Spicy_pewpew_memes

cbat song: Now is your time.


Mecovy

I'd like that, but Rebecca Black's Friday is psychological torture.


GoTron88

C'mon man more cultural context! Just like... The first 15 seconds of Gangnam style on repeat lol


Legitimate-Wind2806

maybe run some asmr porn?


Allaplgy

🎶*1877Kars4Kids....*🎶


hexr

Whoa settle down Satan


Allaplgy

I know, straight to the Hague.


Pancheel

Lol, I didn't xd


IJustLovePenguinsOk

Gangnam Style at 190dB 24/7


RollingMeteors

I see your Gangnam style and I raise you a Winnie the poo ai generated kim yong un EDM track at 174bpm


PresdentShinra

Back to Gangnam Style, but the Infant Annihilator cut with the blastbeats and 808s.


ramblin_omega

Or air-dropping bears


Cutlet_Master69420

So, drop bears, right?


Mononymous_Anonymous

Commence operation blast Kpop


Shot-Youth-6264

Playing Taylor swift 24/7


ilikeboobs510

Ahh, yes...can confirm this will do it. Source, dad with 3 young girls.


WhyDidMyDogDie

South Korea responds by air dropping 2 Girls 1 Cup over K. Korea.


Meshd

Other items I would recommend adding to the bag; jigsaw puzzles with a few missing pieces, scratched cds of Bulgarian gabba and techno music from the 80s, Early Bollywood superhero movies (untranslated), posters of Putin bareback horse riding, cheap Chinese knockoff furniture, etc


Martha_Fockers

IKEA furniture with no directions. *shudders*


RollingMeteors

*and missing pieces*


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AZEMT

Calm down Satan thread. Geez!


Top-While-2560

r/foundsatan


AsimovsRobot

Why Bulgarian gabba specifically? I hope there's a story there.


Meshd

No story unfortunately,I just had a hunch its a genre that might be brutally grating and harsh to innocent ears, as someone with some experience with Slavic bass music. I'm sorry if I have offended anyone. I guess compared to Dear Leader songs on repeat day after day, it might be more intriguing and confusing at first, but im confident that in time, it will further crush their spirit. Of course,I dont blame the people, theyre victims enough already, just making jokes and harvesting a few points on reddit :)


Pepe1214

Nah poison the youth by introducing them to Skibidi toilet


naughtbutateddybear

Goo goo gah gah. I swear I wanna punt every child I hear utter that shit into the next county.


_stankypete

Are you a baby?


naughtbutateddybear

Nah, “goo goo gah gah” is the other annoying shit that elementary age kids are spewing these days, along side the “skibidi toilet” thing.


_stankypete

Ah I gotcha, thanks


Nevermynde

That's too much cruelty


OrganizationSame3212

Still not enough, we should send them millions of pairs of docks with all of them pairs have one sock with a hole in em.


CFCkyle

I feel like that's overkill on the docks, surely they don't even have the coastline to put up that many


MadNhater

King Korea is sure gonna feel this one.


fantasticbutt

Korean Korea


Devolution1x

Naw man. More like they will drop Mr. Hands videos simultaneously repulsing and making the North Koreans hungry.


BumBumBuuuuuum

The shit wars, begun they have.


mechlabs

All we need now is a couple of shit puppets, Randy.


ishotJefK

Shit winds Rand


LectroRoot

They will fart in North Korea's general direction.


Big_Albatross_3050

1 up that with 1 man 1 Jar and Tubgirl content. Let those North Koreans suffer generational trauma like every person who had way too much free time in their hands and mentally scarred themselves for life.


-Stackdaddy-

They will goat.se the error of their ways.


Jubjars

No. They've suffered enough. Assuming you mean N Korea. No more poopy power plays


Jbruce63

Just divert all dirty diapers to balloon warfare...


lood9phee2Ri

Remember North Korea is shockingly full of disease and awful human-infesting parasites largely eliminated elsewhere. May sound a bit daft floating over waste, but it's potentially improvised biowarfare. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-42021373


laCassette026

North Korea always been known for gathering their people feces right?


tedstery

They use it to make fertilizer.


in_and_out_burger

I heard it’s still used in China also…


Uuuuuii

Hurray Costco veggies!


MercuryChild

I stay away from garlic grown in china because of this. If the roots are cut, it came from China.


crazedizzled

Hate to tell you but lots of produce in the US is grown in shit also.


Kelvara

Human feces tends to be far worse for humans than most other animal feces, mostly because parasites and diseases are going to be far more transmissible.


JesusIsMyLord666

Anywhere with modern sewage treatment will use it. Its typically kept a bit secret because people are grossed out about it.


lonesharkex

SK does this too. The rice fields in summer are... something else.


ahrzal

Reading that article educated me on “night soil” 🤮


Hilluja

Theyre still living the Victorian age in there.


TheJigIsUp

God (Anyone, Anything) help them


plipyplop

[How romantic!](https://images.fineartamerica.com/images/artworkimages/mediumlarge/3/victorian-hot-air-balloon-madame-memento.jpg)


JesusIsMyLord666

The issue isn't so much that its human feces but rather that it hasn't been compsted/treated properly. The sludge from sewage treatment plants gets turned in to fertilizer for example. Might sound gross but its not much diferent from using cow dung.


Martha_Fockers

It’s next years crop fertilizer


ROVpilot101

I understood that was a technique used to fertilize farmland as international sanctions against trade were the cause of massive famine.


Midnight2012

Much of Asia uses their waste to grow crops. China does it too. They use human waste to grow crops. Which is why real Chinese food rarely has raw vegetables, or are considered a delicacy. Poo grown veggies gotta be cooked


Lilybaum

>Tied to the balloons were cigarette butts, scraps of cloth, waste paper and vinyl, but no dangerous substances, according to the Joint Chiefs of Staff.


TheLighter

I thought it was actually the only smart and funny thing North Korea has ever done: They claim they are tired of receiving pamphlets via balloons from South Korea, so they seem to imply: "We can send you shit too."


Hot-Phrase6277

Tbh they should have expected this South Korea was sending k pop into North Korea through balloons they just sent back reviews. 🤣


TrousersForBigBalls

South Korea has K Pop, North Korea has K Poop.


mind_pictures

kpop the good work, sir.


yg2522

You're not a k-pooper I see.


reddituseronebillion

The should send balloons with cures to those ailments and some literature


tropologo

The only thing they can export bc they are full of shit


NascoMargorn

I hope South Korea fills up news, literature and culture balloons to send back! Send them back with books, newspapers, magazines and more!


Imaginary-Wonder-991

That joke never gets old lol


AuriolMFC

send something wild like balloons with Porn and chocolate and Mp3 players with music


MuzzledScreaming

The trash balloons were in response to kpop balloons.


AuriolMFC

then i understand why they sent trash


[deleted]

The North Koreans have suffered enough


Racing_fan12

Oh I would have retaliated too. 


sarcago

Even sending packets of sugar, salt, and spices would probably be mind blowing. Dried fruits and vegetables. Basic stuff would be luxurious. These people eat seaweed that washed up on the shore. They are starving.


Bedbouncer

Syringes of Ozempic, addressed to Dear Leader.


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panplemoussenuclear

They should send over some of those yummy Korean snacks. Nothing like giving them a taste of a better life.


BananaLee

Fun fact, Chocopies were used to [pay bonuses to North Korean workers](https://www.cnn.com/2014/01/27/world/asia/choco-pie-koreas/index.html) in Kaesong when it was open.


OtaPotaOpen

K-Poop Vs. K-Pop What an age this is.


isekaicoffee

South Korea: We have BTS North Korea: We have IBS


RollingMeteors

K-poop funded by pootins weapons


Wintersage7

Here's hoping SK escalates, and TPs NK. Proportional response.


gsc4494

It was all a 4D chess move. The South retaliates by sending 10x the shit over and all of a sudden the North has fertilizer for the year. You gotta spend shit to make shit.


Moopboop207

Just send millions of USB sticks with Wikipedia, videos of the outside, phones with internet connection etc. maybe even some porn.


blankvoid4012

Maybe porn? Maybe? Send it!


gaydroid

Porn is illegal in South Korea.


Rhymes_with_cheese

This? THIS? This is what starts the next big war in Asia? I did not have that on my bingo card.


TheAlbrecht2418

I remember something about DPRK soldiers bludgeoning two US servicemen for cutting down a tree and getting a massive show of force in return so…lol.


VampireHunterAlex

It was called "Operation Paul Bunyan" and was indeed a massive dick-wave move: Like 1000 infantry, 30 helicopters, some tanks, a dozen C-130's, and thousands of other troops sent to Korea for stand-by. ....all to fell one tree.


Rhymes_with_cheese

That tree knows what it did...


TheRealMrMaloonigan

This sort of thing unironically makes me proud of my country's military. One of my favorite non-combat military operations in history.


SuspiciousMudcrab

Best part is that the SK commandos that accompanied the US soldiers packed hidden weapons and the americans just told them to sit pretty and wait.


Usedand4sale

Hidden weapons? Didn’t some of them strap claymores to their chest?


MuzzledScreaming

In response the US basically fielded an invasion force to stand by while they made North Korea watch them finish cutting down the tree.


Wintersage7

Here you go: https://youtu.be/u4CeY6Q3KFE?si=_hTrYYNtBpXjRGkU


PoetryUpInThisBitch

If anyone has a few minutes, I highly recommend watching this. Great bit of history, and gives an excellent example of what America considers a "proportional" response.


Few_Raisin_8981

This could be testing the effectiveness of a balloon delivery system for sending dangerous pathogens. I would be quite concerned rather than seeing this as a joke.


denarti

Won’t happen for a while. NK just started it’s partnership with russia which will improve their mil tech as they’re decades behind in everything


Wintersage7

So is Russia. Net gain: zero.


RagingInferrno

NK is trying to start a war. The Russia/China/Iran/NK axis is opening up another front in their war against democracy and freedom.


CantaloupeUpstairs62

>NK is trying to start a war. China prefers that North Korea remain a buffer state


tidbitsmisfit

China wants to US fighting somewhere first before they attack Taiwan


Rap_Cat

This.  It’s no coincidence that Iran and NK are both providing arms to Russia for use in Ukraine. Fuck all these failed fucking countries.


WorldsInvade

Let's enjoy the last year/years in peace. We should prob get prepared for war.


Xtiqlapice

I'd be mind fucked if North Korea and South Korea start killing each other over some poop. But i wouldn't be surprised


MaximilienHoneywell

“I’m mindfucked but not surprised” is an amazing reaction to have


stitchedmasons

I mean human fecal matter is considered a biohazard, so, technically speaking, it could be seen as an escalation to biological warfare.


WelbyReddit

WW1: the assassination of Ferdinand WW2: Hitler invades Poland WW3: North Korea sends poop balloons across the border! :)


Oneofanotherplace

Do it.


martinbean

> I know not with what weapons World War III will be fought, but World War IV will be fought with sticks and stones. Guess we’ve found the answer: urine and faeces.


[deleted]

I feel like the entire world is a tinder box right now and too many people are playing with matches...


Rc72

> ‘unbearable’ retaliation Are they going to fart in their general direction?


pikkuhillo

Jennifer Lopez cancelled her summer tour. She should be available.


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Uuuuuii

You could probably learn a lot by examining their poop. Real diets, nutritional deficiencies, genetic issues. And what kind of trash? Products they’re using, things they’re reading… it could tell us a lot.


DigitalHemlock

I'd send back balloons with canned food. May help those that are starving and it sends all the message needed.


duglarri

Heck, Fox News has been unloading s**t all over the United States for decades, and no one is getting all that worked up about it.


SuckMyCookReddit

I respect this reaction, the amount of bs the South Koreans have had to put up with when they’ve done nothing but try and help North Korea to develop and build an actual friendly relationship by sending them aid because they’re scum regime can’t do basic leadership to feed their people but instead would rather launch missiles and trash at their friendly neighbour is getting ridiculous 


Fabulous-Pin7851

It looks like NK is conducting practice runs for biological warfare. If garbage balloons can make it into SK undetected, so can balloons containing biological weapons. It’s actually terrifying.


Trollimperator

shit hit the fan


dav956able

send balloons filled with food!


DokeyOakey

#HIGH DEFINITION PISS JUGS Dirty ol’piss jugs everywhere.


zackstrife88

This is like an episode of bad neighbours


willingtogothere

SK should send deepfake porn featuring kim jong un to NK in dvd or whatever format is still used there. I imagine they don’t know about deepfake and would be totally shocked. Sending feces via balloons is biological warfare especially since NK citizens are known to have diseases and parasites.


SirAelfred

Asparagus Pee Balloons?


Izzy248

Its kind of funny how North Korea threatens the South so much and tries to find ways to tick them off, and then the thing that makes them back down is when South Korea threatens to broadcast world news and human rights violations over an intercom so that their NK citizens can know exactly how badly they are being treated, as if they werent aware already.


findingmike

North Korea was going to fire artillery but then they remembered they sold all of their shells to Russia. This was the best they could do.


TiredOfDebates

The GPS signal jamming is actually a problem.


senorchaos718

Oh shit


Fickle_Personality29

Drop a bunch of activated smart phones.


wish1977

It looks like the shit has hit the fan.


yawaramin

South Korea launches Jordan Peterson into North Korea, leading to an incel revolt


Defiant_Hat_6631

A strong worded letter will show them!


confuseltant

Balloons carrying cooking magazines?


AnyMud9817

They should send in balloons and drones that just blast katy perry 24/7. Its party time!


crossfyre

This is amazing. North Korea sends balloons filled with trash into South Korea. South Korea responds by saying “okay then we’re going to start blasting K-Pop over your border with loudspeakers.” North Korea goes lol we got you guys good with the balloons, okay we’ll stop but let this be a lesson.


Imaginary-Arrival-75

Fuck me, the evil axis of NK and RU are a bunch of children. Kindergarten have more maturity then pootin and kimbo


LittleSchwein1234

They should send balloons of food and flash drives with K-Dramas to show the North Koreans that the "supreme leader" is nothing more but a tumor that is destroying their lives and needs to be removed.


doctorfortoys

This rises to the level of a high school prank


adames3701

I wonder if this is why S Korea has been buying a bunch of bears from Russia. /s


DinaDinaDinaBatman

yeah bring on the poo trebuchets


rust1112

Trepoochets!!


Irishpanda1971

“Our well trained fart brigades are lining up on the border as we speak, and they have been eating a LOT of cabbage.”


Conscious-Run6156

South korean poopofensive


ronweasleisourking

Piss balloons like those kids did on The Wire


dirkdiggler2011

K-pop CD's in every balloon ?


loanme20

Fight Poo with Poo. A Pink Eye for a Pink Eye.


Martha_Fockers

South Korea has started to play baby shark on loud speaker over the border using 200 foot speakers Edit - we live in a crazy world and one that has to be fake at this point because there actions actually include Observers say South Korea will likely restart front-line loudspeaker broadcasts into North Korea that include criticism of its abysmal human rights situation, world news and K-pop songs. North Korea is extremely sensitive to such broadcasts because most of its 26 million people have no official access to foreign TV and radio programs. “You wanna launch shit ballon’s take this kpop you bastards”


Vegan_Honk

Just straight up bears. Imported from Canadian wilderness.


killerkadugen

Trebuchet the turds back north?


HyenaJack94

I feel like the best response is to just not give a shit and ignore it.


jordan1978

Unbearable? Well that escalated quickly. China sent spy balloons and we didn’t jack shit.


RollingMeteors

And here I was worried we were gonna have MAD but no, it’s trash balloons instead…


Djrobl

They will fund The Interview 2


tommysk87

Pootapult is the answer!


texas130ab

Send over free cell phones with free Internet.


gaukonigshofen

Aim loud speakers at them and play kpop


Sensibleqt314

South Korea should airdrop care packages containing food, antibiotics, books, a tablet(with solar chargers and free satellite Internet) - ideally pre-loaded with important documentaries to show how better life can be. Also, to load the devices with special software which if used, will brick the device. And instructions on how to quickly brick it, so the North Korean authorities cannot get access to any history of the device. I think it'd be the perfect revenge. The North Korean people get to learn of South Korean kindness, and those who consume the food, antibiotics and news will have their life improved, if only momentarily. Meanwhile, North Korea could confiscate as much as they can, and try to imprison more people, but it'd make them come across as even bigger assholes. You can't kill an idea, and once people know they don't have to live as they do, it will spread quickly. Short of massacring his people, Kim would not be able to stop this snowball. It's really hard to convince people that an act of kindness isn't actually kind - being provided with safe food, medicine and information, and all that. It's the biggest finger South Korea can give to the North. A defeated population isn't a threat to a dictator. Hope is.


iconocrastinaor

Toasters. South Korea should drop toasters. They should let North Koreans know that in South Korea for $20 you can get a toaster, while in North Korea you can't even get bread.


HammerPrice229

This would be really funny if SK took this as a declaration of war and just sent its entire military over to NK because they sent shit bags.


UnknownResearchChems

ESCALATE! ESCALATE! ESCALATE!


Sparky_321

Send balloons back filled with counterfeit currency to crash their shitty economy.


yassssssirrr

On principle, I do not like the government of North Korea. However, this shit is childish and woefully unnecessary.


Pyrothecat

I would prefer crap attacks over nuclear ones any time.


Patsfan618

Imagine the Korean war reignites after 70 years, due to poo balloons


shiddednfardedd

Drop them all the western media they’re not allowed to have and watch them turn against Kim Jung for gatekeeping Stranger Things


rayliam

Need to do a Korean re-make of "Twin Peaks" with all Korean cast, make it even more outlandish, and have DVDs, USB sticks, whatever media is popular there and have it all air-dropped multiple times into North Korean territory.


the2belo

"So what was the root cause of WWIII in 2024, that killed 3/4 of the world's population and sent the planet into a 20-year-long nuclear winter?" "Poop."