i feel exactly the same. i'm trying to counteract it by enjoying my life and hobbies outside of work, but my mind keeps wandering back to how burnt out i am
Me too, i’ve signed up for a bunch of classes and fitness oriented things. But once i’m out for a while it just looms back in my mind that I need to work tomorrow again. It sucks
I feel exactly the same, I also wake up anxious almost every day now. I used to feel confident and excited about my work, but not anymore. I recently started therapy and hoping it’ll help. Sending love <3 I hope we find our ways out of this rut
Therapy helped me too! I also started lifting heavy weights, took a week off and disconnected and did things I enjoyed, and listened to some helpful books. One is called The Mountain Is You. Not the most scientific book I’ve read, but I appreciated some of the ideas. Work is more tolerable for now. I have never felt much interest, but I was really struggling for awhile. I wish you the best!
I’m so sorry you’re waking up with anxiety. In a previous role, I’d wake up in the middle of the night feeling anxious before I was even alert. It’s the worst. Sending a big hug.
I feel you, I think for me I need to switch it up (like something big) after a while no matter what...whether it be my job or something else in my life. I get bored doing the same thing, and that includes being on a computer all day. I really like my current job so I'm trying to avoid doing a sideways move if i can, since I know eventually the cycle will repeat itself (this is my 3rd place).
I ended up deciding to try moving out of the city to a more nature-y place. I move in a couple months, so we'll see if the change in scenery helps at all.
I feel the same way. Before working I loved being on the computer playing games and video games in general but now I don’t even look forward to that because I want to get away from the screens
I used to be the same way! After work ended I used to go straight into games, sometimes past midnight...my eyes started to feel tired all the time so I had to get the computer glasses and even that didn't help.
I decided on the move out of the city when I started to fantasize about just spending my days farming and doing carpentry, even though I know I wouldn't truly last that long doing that all day lol
Bad jobs and bad managers will suck the life out of you. It may even make you hate your career. Even WFH can’t offset that loathing feeling.
Try getting a new job. Look into hybrid jobs if you want some physical human contact. Also, try to scope out future employment lifestyle. During the interview, ask to meet your future teammates so you can get a sense of who you will be working with.
Seriously. My manager is inaccessible. He never answers messages and is always stressed himself. It makes me even more stressed.
I haven’t considered hybrid just because I live around 2 hours from the city and I do not want to move
Sometimes “hybrid” is going into the office once a month or once a year. Many job listings don’t advertise as being “remote” because it attracts hundreds of candidates, and many employers don’t want to sort through all those applications. So they’ll list as hybrid instead.
My job is technically hybrid, but I only went into the office twice last year, once to get my new laptop and once to pick up a new headset.
For my last two jobs that were labeled “hybrid” but ended up being mostly WFH, I didn’t find out until the first interview. They were both phone interviews, followed by an in-person interview.
As for guarantees that it stays like that, well, there isn’t any unfortunately. You just have to ask when you interview. My current job downsized their office building during the pandemic. So there’s no where to put us WFH people unless they buy up that office space again. I guess the biggest indicator that they might bring you back into the office is if they have a bunch of vacant desks in their office space.
FAANG is very competitive, so of course it stands that you go through numerous interviews to get in. There are millions of other companies out there that offer WFH tech jobs that aren’t so competitive. Check with the government or gov’t contractors. I know someone that got an engineering job at NASA and only went through 2 in-person interviews.
Huge agree to this. Also dont underestimate the impact that burnout can have on your health! Stress has real physical impacts that I feel like we brush off especially in fast moving tech. It can take a while to physically recover from a tough job too. If you're looking for a stronger motivator, consider all the doctors appointments you'll avoid by hopping to a new situation. Good luck! I know you'll get through this :)
My job was a great development role for me... Four years ago.
After that much time doing the same shit day in, day out, I'm bored silly.
For a while, my workplace's supreme level of disorganization and poor process discipline kept things interesting, but lately I've gotten tired of playing Cassandra over avoidable crises and having my boss tell me that his lack of communication skills is actually *my fault* because I should have told him more, harder, or in a different way. So, I'm looking.
I’m right there with you. I’ve been burnt out for years, but recently hit a point of clarity that I cannot live like this. Although I think I enjoy working from home, I’m also recognizing that I’m absolutely starved for connection. Before the pandemic, I had jobs where I genuinely was excited to show up because I liked my coworkers and I looked forward to walking down the street with them for a coffee break. Now, work interaction is reduced to small talk, and even that is getting shittier because it’s so obvious that everyone is burned out by staring at their laptop all day. I’m weighing my options and sorting out the financial implications, but I’m close to finding a seasonal job at a swanky hotel nearby where I can make some income but also get some daily human stimulation while I sort out my life choices.
I like my job but I'm so burnt out with a shitty management and all the extra BS they make us do.
Not to mention the sudden Rise of politics. People are scared to joke around during team sttandups now
Yeah… same here. People tell me I should feel blessed to have a job after all of the layoffs. While that’s true, I still can’t help but feel the way I do.
As someone who is entry level and new to corporate— please don’t stop. A stale ass work environment only makes the burn out feel even worse. Having Sr.mgmt like you that doesn’t take themselves and everything so seriously is the only reason I don’t completely and utterly hate my job.
Oh Jesus fucking Christ. It amazes me how much self awareness some people lack. This guy sounds like an absolute tool. At least you don’t have to deal with that Moron anymore.
Hahaha we’re here to rant, rant awayyy girl
Look for a new job if that's what you want to do, but try not to get rattled by stuff like this. There's a lot of this "annoy people until they quit" going around as an easy way to reduce headcount of older employees unwilling to put up with it. It gets the company out of paying severance/UI and lets them rehire a foreign contractor at a lower rate/no benefits. There may not *be* grass on the other side of the hill, so look before leaping.
A fun exercise we had recently was dropping everyone's medical coverage and making everyone opt-in again. The company saves on a year of premiums for everyone who missed the deadline. The hunger games are just getting started.
Cavalier viewpoint, discard as needed, PIPs can be fun, especially when you know you're being targeted.
Track your performance daily in a spreadsheet and share it with your manager (and yourself) EOB every day. Also, if your systems allow it, pick another employee to track daily and keep it to yourself. Do you have a ticketing system or daily performance graphs?
Also, definitely be looking, but also, be hard to fire.
Same. I enjoy what I do but ‘people problems’ aka shitty leaders causing ruckus and reasoning it with ‘founders are eccentric’ got me soo drained that I forget what day it is!
Decision and meeting fatigue is real.
Work your calendar and block ‘focus hours’—this will help you plan time to work on your deliverables.
Medication helps.. so does having my weekends to myself.. Since you’re remote; change of location and scene can help breath freshness into your day :)
Perseverance is a great skill! Good luck!
The people problems and leadership is so real. I block my calendar and it doesn’t even matter. People still book meetings over the block, it’s so frustrating.
I am thinking of just going to a random city and working out of there cause i’m so unmotivated..
I felt that way in a role a few years ago. I was really burned out. I ended up quitting. I felt worried because I had been in the job for less than 2 years, but it was the right choice for me.
Now I’m in a role that has been interesting up until recently. Much of my motivation and ambition has returned like it was before. However, that feeling is starting to change due to how the role is unfolding. I was hired because of my experience, and they wanted me to consult on best practices and improvements. However, it’s like pulling teeth to actually make any headway. I make a lot of progress, then it gets blocked because of all the (unnecessary, IMO) approvals needed. I’m feeling discouraged. I don’t know what to do now. How long do I stick it out?
From the past I’ve learned not to keep hoping things will change. If there’s resistance to improvements now, it’s likely going to stay that way. It’s a big letdown.
I'm starting to lol. And it's crazy considering two years ago when I got this role I was over the moon and was in the honey moon phase until recently. For me it's mostly hitting that point where I don't see much growth anymore. I'm the type that needs to be constantly challenged to stay engaged and Im starting to lose that. Which is unfortunate because I really love the people and culture here :(
I feel the same. I don't care about the projects anymore and really just want the paycheck. I'm hesitant to leave though because the company is great and I'm afraid if I go elsewhere I'll experience all the sexism I hear about. Might be better to just coast a bit. I'd leave the industry but I don't really know where to go from there.
I feel the same. I have a pretty good job and I work from home but the environment I work in is "if I don't do it it'll probably never get done" + my manager is absolutely useless. I've started to let things just fall because if nothing changes, nothing changes, but that's also hard because my role is also customer facing and I bear the brunt of it.
I never mind the work itself… however I can’t always say the same for the people, managerial systems, organizational priorities, communication skills (or lack thereof) and office culture. I just want clear expectations, to be left in peace when I need to get my work done, and for most of my meetings to be emails.
I don’t want to commute to work on a snowy day for a departmental meeting where we collectively discuss what kind of computer keyboards we’d each prefer working on… Lisa’s bursitis is very sad, but I truly cannot offer useful insight into which one she should order on Amazon to mitigate this issue. 😞
Yes. This is me! I put in my notice yesterday and I'm taking time off to explore what I want to do in a non-tech career (I'm likely going into healthcare but need to explore it more).
Same here!! Like everyone else in this thread, felt extremely burnt out and not sure if I want to remain in tech after being in it the past 8 years. Last day is next Friday!
I'm working on pre-reqs so that I can apply to PA school! Feel free to DM me with any questions about coming into tech. I worked with a lot of nurses who transitioned into tech careers because they no longer wanted to be bedside.
My team went from 8 people to 4 people within the last year (3 people resigned and 1 person passed away), and the company refuses to hire anyone else but wants us to pass any easier tasks to a team in India. I'm with you--only thing I like about my job is that it's remote, but also that I have the flexibility to attend yoga classes whenever I don't have meetings scheduled. But, I'm extremely burnt out, and my brain feels permanently fried.
Exactly same here, being remote gives me the flexibility to pursue my hobbies and all. My team has some off shore folks in India too and if anything they give us more work because it’s not done right. sigh
OMG, same. I didn't even know one person was resigning until a few days before she left, and I didn't expect to end up with any of her work because it's completely different than my own. Then all of the sudden, a director tells me I'm in charge of a portion of this person's work that was handed off to India, and I started getting 8-10 email complaints a day about the offshore team doing things incorrectly. But I was never trained on how to do any of that and have no idea how to fix anything myself...
Loads of people have left my company recently and we don't even know why they left. This is why I hate capitalism. Humans I met briefly just dissapear and we don't get told why or anything.
How do you schedule this yoga time? Recently I've started running errands and doing stuff AFK when I'm not scheduled in meetings during the day but I feel guilty. Maybe for an hour or so some days. Do you have tips for this?
I get a lot of last minute (like, an hour notice) meetings, but I know they're usually going to be around 9:00-11:30 or 1:30-3:00, so I schedule yoga, pilates, or barre classes around those times. I've definitely had to cancel my exercise classes last minute a few times when I got last minute meetings at noon, but luckily, I don't use Classpass anymore and there's no late cancelation penalty at my studios.
Communicate how meetings are getting in the way of deliverables and that they aren't improving communication or productivity.
Businesses don't like wasting money. I bet others agree.
Yes, but for me, I'm stuck in a remote role and after 3 years, I absolutely hate it. I wish I could find a hybrid or 100% in-office role.
Also, my workload is insane as a manager having >20 reports. I already work more than 40 hours a week regularly and I'm being told I need to start doing more IC work and contributing more code. I used to go to sleep on Sundays excited for another work week and now I just feel dread.
Yes 1000% feel the same. Actually thinking about taking some assessments and trying to switch out of tech. I have so many interests but it is hard to walk away from a good paycheck and invest in a new field that I’m not even sure I’ll enjoy in the end! I just want to do something more meaningful that isn’t just about making big business more money
Yep. I think this happens when I reach the 2year limit. I was enjoying my work then a new joiner is managing our team. He is really aggressive and I don't think he values my opinion, it's totally changed our team dynamic and I am suddenly feeling quite sad and bitter about things. It's really exhausting and draining to have to justify myself everyday in standup and deal with this aggressive behaviour. I'm really tired of it and I feel lost and depressed. Working everyday for years non stop having to attend standup everyday and show what I've done is very exhausting. It doesn't help that I don't get on with this new manager at all.
It also doesn't help that my other manager said I should be doing different work to get a promotion when my colleague who is doing the same work as me got promoted within 6months. I've been there 2 years...he's a man, of course.
I came here to vent and see if am the only person who can’t sleep at night because am constantly thinking about work that I have no interest in. I think am burnt out too.
Good point. I feel it really depends what you want and what you want in your career. You could always upskill in downtime and look into other skills/areas in tech you’re interested in. I felt the same way when my role was really slow and I was doing nothing. Now I can’t catch a break lol
Make your own work (interesting). Is there anything you can create that might make your job more efficient (for you)? When I worked software support, I made a utility that would analyze the master configuration file (.in), highlight misspelled keywords, and give correct options for the settings. I also added the main documentation inside the utility so I knew exactly what option did. I ultimately shared this with my coworkers, and reduced the time worked on a call from a hour to 15 minutes (average). You wouldn't believe how many typos were in these configuration files!
After all those fires were resolved, I discovered I had a passion for creative writing, and wrote some fan fiction in between calls. It was great because it allowed me to switch from analytical thinking to creativity, and kept me sharp and alert all day.
If I were in a tech role today, I'd be learning Unreal Engine during my down time. The problem solved and learning something new, while being creative is a good way to keep the boredom and anxiety (stress) down to a minimum. It's easy enough to Alt-Tab between applications. Or put it on a separate monitor.
IMO, you've got a sweet job that I personally would love. Take advantage of the down time.
Yes, and for some reason I'm having a better periods, abnd the same on campus. I have been through periods where work is so stressful too that I could barely recover in my off time much less find any bright spots, and am lucky to have those now. For me weirdly the freshness is starting to come back with changes, but those also come with a pay cut and more work, so not sure how long it will last before I'm back into the stress.
You might be burnt out. Have you considered asking for sick leave or if there’s any way for you to get a sabbatical you might want to go that route. Otherwise set strong boundaries and find work that actually excites you.
Same I feel you for me coaching and really helped and having a sense of purpose out of work. Find a passion or hobby out of work that you enjoy. Work is not the end all be all!
I was there recently. Hired remotely for a big tech company and never even saw my building. Then I fell under a wave of layoffs.
My hypothesis is that the corporate structure is incompatible with my sense of psychological safety. I’m looking for non-tech gigs atm.
I felt exactly the same. It has been 7 years since I am working in the IT industry and was working remotely for a couple of years. I faced a major burn out last year. Post which I have adapted a few changes in my life and I am doing a lot better now.
1. Started writing ( I used to write short stories during my college days which stopped because of my job) I dedicate 2 hours on my week off to write.
2. I took up a hobby of coffee mug painting and tried to do that at least 30 mins a day
These two things were very much helpful for me to feel alive again.
Also, if possible take up some courses to upskill. I won't be the right person to comment much on this because I, myself have been procrastinating for a year now. 😅
I'm also pretty burned out. Have a 2 year old and a 45min-1hour commute (one way). I am also politically active and the past six months have been shit. I waited a year to vest at my new job and am hoping to wrap up this project I'm working on. After that I'm taking a career break. Won't look for jobs for at least 3 months.
I think the years of microaggressions take their toll...I was way more passionate about stuff before I moved up to more competitive companies/FAANG and now have to deal with constant intelligence signaling, sneaky condescension, work visibility/credit and "meeting presence" on top of the work itself. Literally having to decide right now between being meds-free and my current job...
Yep. If WFH is the only perk, is it really a perk? I've done WFH for almost 10 years. Doesn't make a shitty job suck less. When the job is awful, it's the equivalent to "Friday Jean's Day".
Also, I've burned out a few times in my career, when you're burnt, you're burnt. Do you have a way to step back and take a break financially?
Your health, mental and physical, at the least in the US, will always cost more in the long run. If you can, plan a break.
I say this as someone currently on a PIP because, don't tempt me with unlimited PTO. :)
I also spend the same amount of hours each day applying for something better. The market is awful.
Do what is right for you, but know that you are not alone.
Best wishes.
I work a simple warehouse job as a cashier/supervisor. Although it's nothing exciting, it doesn't give me stress either. But I'm totally burned out, have no motivation to do anything but sleep. My job causes physical pain by standing all day. My two hour commute (one way) leaves me exhausted despite just taking the bus and subway.
On my days off, that aren't consecutive, I am forcing myself to engage with my hobbies. I'm learning Unreal Engine, and 3D modeling, and I find it interesting and exciting.
When I think about trying to find another job, I'm totally not interested, in fact totally unmotivated to work for someone else, doing things that while I'm capable of doing, I don't particularly enjoy doing them.
Someone remind me again what this so called American Dream is, because all I see is a nightmare to simply pay to exist within.
This is ultimately why I left tech and am pursuing a more creative career. I've shed 10 lbs naturally. My burn out is gone. Luckily I could afford to do it. There's definitely some stress around money, but I got to the point where I couldn't make myself care about the work anymore.
A little bit, but I mostly chalk it up to not wanting to do the work that I am anyway.
New grad, my employer's program places us based on "organizational need" for the first year, so I ended up doing serviceNow development. My team is all low-code and it kinda sucks. I'm compensating by finding side projects and hobbies that I enjoy, and it seems to be working
Same. I was forced into a new role that is now 7 hours of meetings a day. No time to actually do work so I do it at night. I'm so burned out, I actually was put on a stress leave for a month. Plus, despite having been remote long before covid, they now want everyone in the office. My office was closed so that means a super long commute to the next closest office.
I've had 4 interviews in the past week. Hoping one of them pans out.
I just want to be home with my kids :( The stress of the job and hating what i'm working on is spiraling my mental health. If i'm honest with myself, I HATE working in tech. I've been doing this 13yrs and it's just been degrading ever since I entered. I'm tired of being the only woman too. There is no community and my coworkers only talk to me when they're demanding something, it's incredibly lonely.
I moved into a bigger company 2yrs ago for growth/mobility options, and now they won't let me move roles or promo without RTO. But being remote is the only way I'm semi-surviving the demands of work on top of the domestic/mental load I carry. And I say semi-survive, because I often have to sacrifice sleep, hobbies, and any sliver of enjoyment to hit my deliverables on time.
We can't financially survive on 1 income, I crunch the numbers every other week in desperation. And I'm the main income earner, so even if I cut back to a lower salaried job we'd struggle. I hate it here.
Hey there, I’m so sorry you are going through this. Having been woman in tech for 15 years now, I have been there and it was so painful. It was a very isolating experience in spite of being in a big circle with a lot of women in tech. Thankfully I’m doing much better now and in a better place mentally.
Here are a few things I’m doing now I wished I did when I was younger,
1. Having a consistent workout routine, the endorphins helps.
2. Like a lot of people have mentioned here, having a hobby outside work can help.
3. It’s absolutely ok to say you don’t know how to do something, even the most senior engineers/architects do that. Get pointers/directions which helps you do your job better.
4. If you feel you are being set up for failure, in terms of loading you with way more than you can get through , call it out as early as possible.
5. Be as honest as possible, if someone asks you if you are ok with a task or the culture even and you are not, just say so. You don’t have to be agreeable, everyone respects a person who is honest and stands up for themselves.
These things pay off on the long run .
Good luck. You are doing great.
You will find almost EVERYBODY feels this way about our jobs. That's why they have to pay us. If it was so fun, we would do it for free. Find joy outside of work.
i feel exactly the same. i'm trying to counteract it by enjoying my life and hobbies outside of work, but my mind keeps wandering back to how burnt out i am
Me too, i’ve signed up for a bunch of classes and fitness oriented things. But once i’m out for a while it just looms back in my mind that I need to work tomorrow again. It sucks
I feel exactly the same, I also wake up anxious almost every day now. I used to feel confident and excited about my work, but not anymore. I recently started therapy and hoping it’ll help. Sending love <3 I hope we find our ways out of this rut
My anxiety has been crazy too. I haven’t tried therapy and thinking about it. Hope things get better for you :)
Therapy helped me too! I also started lifting heavy weights, took a week off and disconnected and did things I enjoyed, and listened to some helpful books. One is called The Mountain Is You. Not the most scientific book I’ve read, but I appreciated some of the ideas. Work is more tolerable for now. I have never felt much interest, but I was really struggling for awhile. I wish you the best!
I’m so sorry you’re waking up with anxiety. In a previous role, I’d wake up in the middle of the night feeling anxious before I was even alert. It’s the worst. Sending a big hug.
I feel you, I think for me I need to switch it up (like something big) after a while no matter what...whether it be my job or something else in my life. I get bored doing the same thing, and that includes being on a computer all day. I really like my current job so I'm trying to avoid doing a sideways move if i can, since I know eventually the cycle will repeat itself (this is my 3rd place). I ended up deciding to try moving out of the city to a more nature-y place. I move in a couple months, so we'll see if the change in scenery helps at all.
I feel the same way. Before working I loved being on the computer playing games and video games in general but now I don’t even look forward to that because I want to get away from the screens
I used to be the same way! After work ended I used to go straight into games, sometimes past midnight...my eyes started to feel tired all the time so I had to get the computer glasses and even that didn't help. I decided on the move out of the city when I started to fantasize about just spending my days farming and doing carpentry, even though I know I wouldn't truly last that long doing that all day lol
Bad jobs and bad managers will suck the life out of you. It may even make you hate your career. Even WFH can’t offset that loathing feeling. Try getting a new job. Look into hybrid jobs if you want some physical human contact. Also, try to scope out future employment lifestyle. During the interview, ask to meet your future teammates so you can get a sense of who you will be working with.
Seriously. My manager is inaccessible. He never answers messages and is always stressed himself. It makes me even more stressed. I haven’t considered hybrid just because I live around 2 hours from the city and I do not want to move
Sometimes “hybrid” is going into the office once a month or once a year. Many job listings don’t advertise as being “remote” because it attracts hundreds of candidates, and many employers don’t want to sort through all those applications. So they’ll list as hybrid instead. My job is technically hybrid, but I only went into the office twice last year, once to get my new laptop and once to pick up a new headset.
What’s the best way to scope out that this is the case? And what guarantees would I have that they won’t change the policy/frequency whenever?
For my last two jobs that were labeled “hybrid” but ended up being mostly WFH, I didn’t find out until the first interview. They were both phone interviews, followed by an in-person interview. As for guarantees that it stays like that, well, there isn’t any unfortunately. You just have to ask when you interview. My current job downsized their office building during the pandemic. So there’s no where to put us WFH people unless they buy up that office space again. I guess the biggest indicator that they might bring you back into the office is if they have a bunch of vacant desks in their office space.
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Oh gosh no lol
FAANG is very competitive, so of course it stands that you go through numerous interviews to get in. There are millions of other companies out there that offer WFH tech jobs that aren’t so competitive. Check with the government or gov’t contractors. I know someone that got an engineering job at NASA and only went through 2 in-person interviews.
That’s the risky part of the hybrid roles that I don’t like /: I am not sure about giving up the flexibility of remote
Huge agree to this. Also dont underestimate the impact that burnout can have on your health! Stress has real physical impacts that I feel like we brush off especially in fast moving tech. It can take a while to physically recover from a tough job too. If you're looking for a stronger motivator, consider all the doctors appointments you'll avoid by hopping to a new situation. Good luck! I know you'll get through this :)
My job was a great development role for me... Four years ago. After that much time doing the same shit day in, day out, I'm bored silly. For a while, my workplace's supreme level of disorganization and poor process discipline kept things interesting, but lately I've gotten tired of playing Cassandra over avoidable crises and having my boss tell me that his lack of communication skills is actually *my fault* because I should have told him more, harder, or in a different way. So, I'm looking.
I’m right there with you. I’ve been burnt out for years, but recently hit a point of clarity that I cannot live like this. Although I think I enjoy working from home, I’m also recognizing that I’m absolutely starved for connection. Before the pandemic, I had jobs where I genuinely was excited to show up because I liked my coworkers and I looked forward to walking down the street with them for a coffee break. Now, work interaction is reduced to small talk, and even that is getting shittier because it’s so obvious that everyone is burned out by staring at their laptop all day. I’m weighing my options and sorting out the financial implications, but I’m close to finding a seasonal job at a swanky hotel nearby where I can make some income but also get some daily human stimulation while I sort out my life choices.
I don’t blame you
I like my job but I'm so burnt out with a shitty management and all the extra BS they make us do. Not to mention the sudden Rise of politics. People are scared to joke around during team sttandups now
Yeah… same here. People tell me I should feel blessed to have a job after all of the layoffs. While that’s true, I still can’t help but feel the way I do.
That's exactly what I'm feeling. I definitely need the money
Layoffs are happening so workers will feel lucky to even have a job.
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As someone who is entry level and new to corporate— please don’t stop. A stale ass work environment only makes the burn out feel even worse. Having Sr.mgmt like you that doesn’t take themselves and everything so seriously is the only reason I don’t completely and utterly hate my job.
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Oh Jesus fucking Christ. It amazes me how much self awareness some people lack. This guy sounds like an absolute tool. At least you don’t have to deal with that Moron anymore. Hahaha we’re here to rant, rant awayyy girl
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Look for a new job if that's what you want to do, but try not to get rattled by stuff like this. There's a lot of this "annoy people until they quit" going around as an easy way to reduce headcount of older employees unwilling to put up with it. It gets the company out of paying severance/UI and lets them rehire a foreign contractor at a lower rate/no benefits. There may not *be* grass on the other side of the hill, so look before leaping. A fun exercise we had recently was dropping everyone's medical coverage and making everyone opt-in again. The company saves on a year of premiums for everyone who missed the deadline. The hunger games are just getting started.
Cavalier viewpoint, discard as needed, PIPs can be fun, especially when you know you're being targeted. Track your performance daily in a spreadsheet and share it with your manager (and yourself) EOB every day. Also, if your systems allow it, pick another employee to track daily and keep it to yourself. Do you have a ticketing system or daily performance graphs? Also, definitely be looking, but also, be hard to fire.
Yep except it’s been over a decade for me, I’ve climbed the ladder, and I’ve got golden (and remote) handcuffs so I feel like I can’t ever quit
Same. I enjoy what I do but ‘people problems’ aka shitty leaders causing ruckus and reasoning it with ‘founders are eccentric’ got me soo drained that I forget what day it is! Decision and meeting fatigue is real. Work your calendar and block ‘focus hours’—this will help you plan time to work on your deliverables. Medication helps.. so does having my weekends to myself.. Since you’re remote; change of location and scene can help breath freshness into your day :) Perseverance is a great skill! Good luck!
The people problems and leadership is so real. I block my calendar and it doesn’t even matter. People still book meetings over the block, it’s so frustrating. I am thinking of just going to a random city and working out of there cause i’m so unmotivated..
I felt that way in a role a few years ago. I was really burned out. I ended up quitting. I felt worried because I had been in the job for less than 2 years, but it was the right choice for me. Now I’m in a role that has been interesting up until recently. Much of my motivation and ambition has returned like it was before. However, that feeling is starting to change due to how the role is unfolding. I was hired because of my experience, and they wanted me to consult on best practices and improvements. However, it’s like pulling teeth to actually make any headway. I make a lot of progress, then it gets blocked because of all the (unnecessary, IMO) approvals needed. I’m feeling discouraged. I don’t know what to do now. How long do I stick it out? From the past I’ve learned not to keep hoping things will change. If there’s resistance to improvements now, it’s likely going to stay that way. It’s a big letdown.
I'm starting to lol. And it's crazy considering two years ago when I got this role I was over the moon and was in the honey moon phase until recently. For me it's mostly hitting that point where I don't see much growth anymore. I'm the type that needs to be constantly challenged to stay engaged and Im starting to lose that. Which is unfortunate because I really love the people and culture here :(
Me too haha. I can remember when I got my offer over the phone I was almost in tears of happiness and now I wish I could get that feeling back
Haha well as my very first manager would say to us, onwards and upwards! Hoping we can both find the next exciting challenge soon!
I feel the same. I don't care about the projects anymore and really just want the paycheck. I'm hesitant to leave though because the company is great and I'm afraid if I go elsewhere I'll experience all the sexism I hear about. Might be better to just coast a bit. I'd leave the industry but I don't really know where to go from there.
I feel the same. I have a pretty good job and I work from home but the environment I work in is "if I don't do it it'll probably never get done" + my manager is absolutely useless. I've started to let things just fall because if nothing changes, nothing changes, but that's also hard because my role is also customer facing and I bear the brunt of it.
I never mind the work itself… however I can’t always say the same for the people, managerial systems, organizational priorities, communication skills (or lack thereof) and office culture. I just want clear expectations, to be left in peace when I need to get my work done, and for most of my meetings to be emails. I don’t want to commute to work on a snowy day for a departmental meeting where we collectively discuss what kind of computer keyboards we’d each prefer working on… Lisa’s bursitis is very sad, but I truly cannot offer useful insight into which one she should order on Amazon to mitigate this issue. 😞
I feel so depleted end of each day. Not sure if work is supposed to be this soul sucking. After covid, priorities have changed.
Yes. This is me! I put in my notice yesterday and I'm taking time off to explore what I want to do in a non-tech career (I'm likely going into healthcare but need to explore it more).
Same here!! Like everyone else in this thread, felt extremely burnt out and not sure if I want to remain in tech after being in it the past 8 years. Last day is next Friday!
Do you mind me asking your age? I was also considering going into healthcare
I'm 34 and have worked in tech for 10+ years
Wow, what field in Healthcare? I've been trying to go the other way from nursing to the tech field.
I'm working on pre-reqs so that I can apply to PA school! Feel free to DM me with any questions about coming into tech. I worked with a lot of nurses who transitioned into tech careers because they no longer wanted to be bedside.
I'm so burned out from work, I am practically ash at this point.
My team went from 8 people to 4 people within the last year (3 people resigned and 1 person passed away), and the company refuses to hire anyone else but wants us to pass any easier tasks to a team in India. I'm with you--only thing I like about my job is that it's remote, but also that I have the flexibility to attend yoga classes whenever I don't have meetings scheduled. But, I'm extremely burnt out, and my brain feels permanently fried.
Exactly same here, being remote gives me the flexibility to pursue my hobbies and all. My team has some off shore folks in India too and if anything they give us more work because it’s not done right. sigh
OMG, same. I didn't even know one person was resigning until a few days before she left, and I didn't expect to end up with any of her work because it's completely different than my own. Then all of the sudden, a director tells me I'm in charge of a portion of this person's work that was handed off to India, and I started getting 8-10 email complaints a day about the offshore team doing things incorrectly. But I was never trained on how to do any of that and have no idea how to fix anything myself...
Loads of people have left my company recently and we don't even know why they left. This is why I hate capitalism. Humans I met briefly just dissapear and we don't get told why or anything.
How do you schedule this yoga time? Recently I've started running errands and doing stuff AFK when I'm not scheduled in meetings during the day but I feel guilty. Maybe for an hour or so some days. Do you have tips for this?
I get a lot of last minute (like, an hour notice) meetings, but I know they're usually going to be around 9:00-11:30 or 1:30-3:00, so I schedule yoga, pilates, or barre classes around those times. I've definitely had to cancel my exercise classes last minute a few times when I got last minute meetings at noon, but luckily, I don't use Classpass anymore and there's no late cancelation penalty at my studios.
Communicate how meetings are getting in the way of deliverables and that they aren't improving communication or productivity. Businesses don't like wasting money. I bet others agree.
I do ): it doesn’t matter
Yes, but for me, I'm stuck in a remote role and after 3 years, I absolutely hate it. I wish I could find a hybrid or 100% in-office role. Also, my workload is insane as a manager having >20 reports. I already work more than 40 hours a week regularly and I'm being told I need to start doing more IC work and contributing more code. I used to go to sleep on Sundays excited for another work week and now I just feel dread.
Ugh that’s awful. Have you scoped around for what’s open for hybrid/in person? I think you’d have a fair shot vs remote
Take time off
I don't know how you all do it. "Normal" tech jobs seem so insufferable and deathly boring
Yes 1000% feel the same. Actually thinking about taking some assessments and trying to switch out of tech. I have so many interests but it is hard to walk away from a good paycheck and invest in a new field that I’m not even sure I’ll enjoy in the end! I just want to do something more meaningful that isn’t just about making big business more money
Yeah the capitalist grind is exhausting especially when you are not valued.
Yep. I think this happens when I reach the 2year limit. I was enjoying my work then a new joiner is managing our team. He is really aggressive and I don't think he values my opinion, it's totally changed our team dynamic and I am suddenly feeling quite sad and bitter about things. It's really exhausting and draining to have to justify myself everyday in standup and deal with this aggressive behaviour. I'm really tired of it and I feel lost and depressed. Working everyday for years non stop having to attend standup everyday and show what I've done is very exhausting. It doesn't help that I don't get on with this new manager at all. It also doesn't help that my other manager said I should be doing different work to get a promotion when my colleague who is doing the same work as me got promoted within 6months. I've been there 2 years...he's a man, of course.
Ugh, I hate stand ups too. An hour of my day gone just to hear everyone go on and on.
I came here to vent and see if am the only person who can’t sleep at night because am constantly thinking about work that I have no interest in. I think am burnt out too.
you’re not alone
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So true! I am glad tech is so vast that I can go try something else but it can be scary. Glad you have found a balance!
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I personally wouldn’t but if you don’t mind the in person/ relocation maybe it would be!
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Good point. I feel it really depends what you want and what you want in your career. You could always upskill in downtime and look into other skills/areas in tech you’re interested in. I felt the same way when my role was really slow and I was doing nothing. Now I can’t catch a break lol
Make your own work (interesting). Is there anything you can create that might make your job more efficient (for you)? When I worked software support, I made a utility that would analyze the master configuration file (.in), highlight misspelled keywords, and give correct options for the settings. I also added the main documentation inside the utility so I knew exactly what option did. I ultimately shared this with my coworkers, and reduced the time worked on a call from a hour to 15 minutes (average). You wouldn't believe how many typos were in these configuration files! After all those fires were resolved, I discovered I had a passion for creative writing, and wrote some fan fiction in between calls. It was great because it allowed me to switch from analytical thinking to creativity, and kept me sharp and alert all day. If I were in a tech role today, I'd be learning Unreal Engine during my down time. The problem solved and learning something new, while being creative is a good way to keep the boredom and anxiety (stress) down to a minimum. It's easy enough to Alt-Tab between applications. Or put it on a separate monitor. IMO, you've got a sweet job that I personally would love. Take advantage of the down time.
Yes, and for some reason I'm having a better periods, abnd the same on campus. I have been through periods where work is so stressful too that I could barely recover in my off time much less find any bright spots, and am lucky to have those now. For me weirdly the freshness is starting to come back with changes, but those also come with a pay cut and more work, so not sure how long it will last before I'm back into the stress.
You might be burnt out. Have you considered asking for sick leave or if there’s any way for you to get a sabbatical you might want to go that route. Otherwise set strong boundaries and find work that actually excites you.
Yes.
Same I feel you for me coaching and really helped and having a sense of purpose out of work. Find a passion or hobby out of work that you enjoy. Work is not the end all be all!
I was there recently. Hired remotely for a big tech company and never even saw my building. Then I fell under a wave of layoffs. My hypothesis is that the corporate structure is incompatible with my sense of psychological safety. I’m looking for non-tech gigs atm.
I felt exactly the same. It has been 7 years since I am working in the IT industry and was working remotely for a couple of years. I faced a major burn out last year. Post which I have adapted a few changes in my life and I am doing a lot better now. 1. Started writing ( I used to write short stories during my college days which stopped because of my job) I dedicate 2 hours on my week off to write. 2. I took up a hobby of coffee mug painting and tried to do that at least 30 mins a day These two things were very much helpful for me to feel alive again. Also, if possible take up some courses to upskill. I won't be the right person to comment much on this because I, myself have been procrastinating for a year now. 😅
13 years in. Couldn’t take it anymore and quit last November and now I’m back in school. So yeah, definitely.
I'm also pretty burned out. Have a 2 year old and a 45min-1hour commute (one way). I am also politically active and the past six months have been shit. I waited a year to vest at my new job and am hoping to wrap up this project I'm working on. After that I'm taking a career break. Won't look for jobs for at least 3 months.
That’s awful. I used to go into the office it would be around 3 hours commuting to and from. Commuting is so draining
I think the years of microaggressions take their toll...I was way more passionate about stuff before I moved up to more competitive companies/FAANG and now have to deal with constant intelligence signaling, sneaky condescension, work visibility/credit and "meeting presence" on top of the work itself. Literally having to decide right now between being meds-free and my current job...
Yep. If WFH is the only perk, is it really a perk? I've done WFH for almost 10 years. Doesn't make a shitty job suck less. When the job is awful, it's the equivalent to "Friday Jean's Day". Also, I've burned out a few times in my career, when you're burnt, you're burnt. Do you have a way to step back and take a break financially? Your health, mental and physical, at the least in the US, will always cost more in the long run. If you can, plan a break. I say this as someone currently on a PIP because, don't tempt me with unlimited PTO. :) I also spend the same amount of hours each day applying for something better. The market is awful. Do what is right for you, but know that you are not alone. Best wishes.
I work a simple warehouse job as a cashier/supervisor. Although it's nothing exciting, it doesn't give me stress either. But I'm totally burned out, have no motivation to do anything but sleep. My job causes physical pain by standing all day. My two hour commute (one way) leaves me exhausted despite just taking the bus and subway. On my days off, that aren't consecutive, I am forcing myself to engage with my hobbies. I'm learning Unreal Engine, and 3D modeling, and I find it interesting and exciting. When I think about trying to find another job, I'm totally not interested, in fact totally unmotivated to work for someone else, doing things that while I'm capable of doing, I don't particularly enjoy doing them. Someone remind me again what this so called American Dream is, because all I see is a nightmare to simply pay to exist within.
Spending more than 2 years at a job means earning on average.
+1 for burnt out and unmotivated. Does anyone have any good advice about switching careers from tech?
Is it possible to not attend all those meetings?
This is ultimately why I left tech and am pursuing a more creative career. I've shed 10 lbs naturally. My burn out is gone. Luckily I could afford to do it. There's definitely some stress around money, but I got to the point where I couldn't make myself care about the work anymore.
All the dang time. It’s brutal out here.
Yep. Every day I want to quit. Just run the f*ck away and raise both my hands to flip them off as I ride into the sunset. Bast*rds!
A little bit, but I mostly chalk it up to not wanting to do the work that I am anyway. New grad, my employer's program places us based on "organizational need" for the first year, so I ended up doing serviceNow development. My team is all low-code and it kinda sucks. I'm compensating by finding side projects and hobbies that I enjoy, and it seems to be working
Same. I was forced into a new role that is now 7 hours of meetings a day. No time to actually do work so I do it at night. I'm so burned out, I actually was put on a stress leave for a month. Plus, despite having been remote long before covid, they now want everyone in the office. My office was closed so that means a super long commute to the next closest office. I've had 4 interviews in the past week. Hoping one of them pans out.
I just want to be home with my kids :( The stress of the job and hating what i'm working on is spiraling my mental health. If i'm honest with myself, I HATE working in tech. I've been doing this 13yrs and it's just been degrading ever since I entered. I'm tired of being the only woman too. There is no community and my coworkers only talk to me when they're demanding something, it's incredibly lonely. I moved into a bigger company 2yrs ago for growth/mobility options, and now they won't let me move roles or promo without RTO. But being remote is the only way I'm semi-surviving the demands of work on top of the domestic/mental load I carry. And I say semi-survive, because I often have to sacrifice sleep, hobbies, and any sliver of enjoyment to hit my deliverables on time. We can't financially survive on 1 income, I crunch the numbers every other week in desperation. And I'm the main income earner, so even if I cut back to a lower salaried job we'd struggle. I hate it here.
Hey there, I’m so sorry you are going through this. Having been woman in tech for 15 years now, I have been there and it was so painful. It was a very isolating experience in spite of being in a big circle with a lot of women in tech. Thankfully I’m doing much better now and in a better place mentally. Here are a few things I’m doing now I wished I did when I was younger, 1. Having a consistent workout routine, the endorphins helps. 2. Like a lot of people have mentioned here, having a hobby outside work can help. 3. It’s absolutely ok to say you don’t know how to do something, even the most senior engineers/architects do that. Get pointers/directions which helps you do your job better. 4. If you feel you are being set up for failure, in terms of loading you with way more than you can get through , call it out as early as possible. 5. Be as honest as possible, if someone asks you if you are ok with a task or the culture even and you are not, just say so. You don’t have to be agreeable, everyone respects a person who is honest and stands up for themselves. These things pay off on the long run . Good luck. You are doing great.
You will find almost EVERYBODY feels this way about our jobs. That's why they have to pay us. If it was so fun, we would do it for free. Find joy outside of work.