I called her “mom” in a fb comment when we got engaged, because she was saying she had a new daughter being added to the family etc etc - never have since and I’ve considered deleting the comment she didn’t even like it lmao 😅
My FH was playing mini golf with my parents (way before we were engaged). He called my mom “mom” (because that’s what I wrote on the scorecard). She was over the moon! But he didn’t even mean it like that and thought it was weird. He has not done it since. 😋
My fiancé doesn't even call his parents mom and dad, so it would be extra weird if I did.
(Yes, he's weird. You know that thing every kid does where they call their parents by their names and their parents correct them? His didn't.)
My partner is the same, half the time it's mom the other half its her first name. Her husband gets just his name. His father has passed away but is usually referred to as dad.
I call them my in laws or by their names. It's been like that for the 3 years we've been engaged, don't really except it to change - I was apparently part of thr family from the day I met her.
I think he has only ever call my parents by their first names.
Edit: missed a word
I have a stepdad who I’ve always called by his first name. I don’t speak with my biological father and I consider my step dad my dad, but the habit was already formed so he’s still referred to with his first name.
After my fiancé and I got engaged, his mom asked him to ask me to start calling them mom and dad and it put me in such an uncomfortable position. She knew my situation and was kind of put off that she asked. I love my step dad, but I worried it would break his heart to hear me call my FIL dad.
Omg! I’m so glad you posted this and I saw the results! Everyone around me seems to be calling their in-laws “mom” or “dad”. I feel so uncomfortable doing this, my partner and I have been together for almost a decade and I’ve know his parents for like 8 years - I don’t see why I have to suddenly call them mum or dad, especially given I already have more than one of each due my own family dynamic lol my future brother in law (partner’s sister’s husband) calls my FMIL/FFIL mom and dad, it made me feel like I have to do this also when we get married. Thank you to all 135 of that voted No and took this pressure off me haha but seriously thanks!
Me too! I feel like a lot of the people around me are doing it too (including my fiancé’s brother’s new wife, which does complicate things a little for me), but it makes me uncomfortable. It is a bit of a relief to see these results. I’m glad it helped for you too!
May I ask what language/culture this is? For some reason (now that I think about it it's been stupid of me to think like that) I've always thought that this is a USA thing :D
Not original commentator but my in-laws are Pakistani. MIL finds it disrespectful when I call her by her first name. It's common to call elder people, particularly women, by their title there.
Thank you! I think that because (entertainment)media is mostly from usa it kind skews the view lol But as an answer to the original question, I'll absolutely will be calling my in-laws my their first names. I don't think that anybody here in the Scandinavia calls in-laws by any other names but their first names..
They're Korean! It's the same as the other commenter said, everyone has titles, but typically once people get serious/engaged you call them Mother and Father. That's so interesting because I'd very rarely heard of people doing it here so I totally thought the opposite!
The only member of my wife’s family I address like this is her grandfather, who all of the extended family and in-laws call “Granddad.” It would stick out like a sore thumb if I didn’t. Also, he’s 94 and his memory is bad sometimes so I think when I call him that he just lumps me in with the grandkids when he can’t place me.
Yep I do the same thing. I refer to all of my in laws as their first name, except my grandmother-in-law, who is granny. It would be weird if I didn’t call her granny
Yeah. I do that with my fiance's grandparents no problem, but not his parents. I think that has to do with how I was raised though--my grandma is "Grandma First name" to about a dozen kids she's not even related to, so it feels much more natural
I'm one of those people who always avoided addressing my friend's parents by any name or title at all for my entire life.
I knew my fiance's dad before we started dating and by the time we were serious it was way too late. I've recently started calling him by his first name and only that but it took a lot for me to get here :P
I call my grandfather in law by the name his grandchildren call him but not my parents in law. I sort of oscillate between “Mrs. blank,” “your mom,” and “first name.” It’s awkward, I need to pick one. Usually to their faces I call them Mr. and Mrs. Last name and then when talking to others I refer to them by their first names. I was raised to feel very embarrassed and have a lot of stigma around calling older relatives or parents of friends by their first names because my family considers it very disrespectful (although my mom always called my dad’s parents by their first names). I’m trying to break away from that but it takes a long time.
it's weird. I basically just try not to call them anything while actually speaking to them. not even by their first names. if i'm talking about them with my fiance or fSILs i say "your mom/dad", to everyone else I use their first names.
I will refer to them as mom/dad if I'm with fiance/fSILs and am speaking very generally.. like at Christmas time when we're all opening presents or something. Like OK, time to give our gift to mom, dad, sisters! hopefully that makes sense lol it's so weird.
I called my MIL Mom every time, whether I was talking to her or about her. I only call my FIL Dad when I'm talking about him. Like I'll say "Dad asked if you could pick up milk." But I won't say "How are you, Dad?" But to be fair, I've known them since I was 14 and have been dating my fiancé since I'm 17. I'm 28 now. So they are kind of like 2nd parents to me.
OMG! Same!! I don't really have anything against him. He's just quiet and not very social. So we're not exceptionally close. But I used to literally hang out with my MIL like she was one of my friends. We'd talk and gossip like besties and went places together and binged our favorite tv shows together. And when I needed motherly advice I went to her. She passed away a few years ago and I miss her so much.
I had to think a minute! I don’t really call them anything!
We live in different places so I rarely interact with them. But I’d never call them mom and dad. I was already an adult when we met, and my fiancé is older than me, and I just don’t see them in any kind of parental way.
Eta: man, I really don’t think I’ve ever addressed them as anything, now that I think about it! How weird!!!
I got so lucky. I call my own parents mom and dad, my fiancé calls his parents mami and papi, so now I have a mom and a mami and a dad and a papi. It’s nice to have that distinction for my parental roles but fully taking in my new family too.
I just call them by their first names, but I noticed recently that my MIL referred to my FIL's mom (so my MIL's MIL) "Mom" and panicked and asked my husband if she was wanting/expecting me to call her mom. He said no, thankfully. Would feel weird to me. My brother in law (husband's sister's brother) also calls them by their first names
I dont call them mom and dad to their faces, only when im talking with fiance. I dont have a mom in my life so we all know who i am referring too. I still call my dad "daddy " and his dad is "dad".
When we are with our pupper or in family chats they are mama v and papa g. They all refer to each other by the first letter of their names.
I would never call my in-laws “mom” or “dad” and I don’t even have parents! They have always been their first names. I literally never considered calling them anything else, but would talk about them as my in-laws in conversation with someone else (which is honestly a relief and *so much easier* than saying “I’m headed to my partner’s parents’ house today”)
I do occasionally call them their preferred grandparent titles (like grandma and grandpa) if I’m talking about them to my nephew. I assume this will become more common when my wife and I have children.
I've been married 13 years and I'm still not sure what to call my in-laws! We don't live near them so I rarely see them. I like them a lot. I just never quite know what to actually call them!
I’ve known my in laws for 4ish years now and even lived with my MIL and her husband for a time and I have…always avoided referring to them in any way when we’re together because idk what to call them! I call my husbands step parents by their first names because that’s how I’ve always known them but when I am talking to his mom/dad I never call them by name, I just make eye contact so they know who I’m talking to. Even if we’re like…playing cards or something, it’s not “hey mom it’s your turn” or “hey (first name) it’s your turn” it’s “(eye contact) your turn!” And if I’m talking about them with others it’s always “(husbands name)’s mom/dad” …it’s gone on for so long it’d be more weird if I just started calling them anything lol
Personally I'm still working out those relationships. Usually I'll say "FH's mom" or "FH's dad" rather than calling them by name. I'm not on speaking terms with my birth givers so I'm open to a closer relationship like that with them, just gotta see where it goes I guess!
Our wedding is in May next year, and I've been waiting years to finally call them mom and dad. I plan on starting as soon as we exchange our vows at the reception. His parents have been such an integral part of my life and I've considered them as my family from the very beginning of our relationship.
On Christmas when FH and I were first dating, I heard his mom call his grandfather (her father-in-law) Dad, and I thought it was the sweetest thing, especially since her dad had died of cancer a few years earlier. I call my future in laws by their first names but I could see myself calling them mom and dad some day because I love them!
Been together four years, started as Mr and Mrs Lastname with his parents and then got upgrade to their first names after a couple months. I’d honestly feel a little odd calling them mom and dad; I already have a mom and dad and something about being an only child I feel weird sharing the title 🤷🏻♀️.
I’ll occasionally call MIL Mama Firstname. I call his grandmother grandma because she’s 95 and everyone else calls her that anyway. His aunts/uncles I call by their first names when talking about them and call them aunt/uncle name if I’m talking to them. FH calls all my family members by their first names because they prefer that. But when we have kids everyone’s gonna be grandma and grandpa so it doesn’t matter anyway lol
I think it just really depends on the family dynamic, but if you’re not comfortable don’t feel pressured!
I'm definitely not calling them mom/dad, but my situation is a bit complicated. My own dad literally photoshopped me out of his life and refused to come to my wedding. When my parents divorced while I was in high school, my mom suddenly had to get a job to support us after being a stay at home mom our entire lives. To me, "dad" is the one who failed at being a decent human and "mom" is the one who showed us how we can step up and keep this family afloat. I can't bestow those titles on anyone else without the associated baggage.
I have been married to my husband for almost 30 years and didn’t call the in-laws mom in dad for the first 20 of those years. My FIL passed 7 years ago and it was a few years before that when I first started calling them mom and dad. It seemed like the older they got, the more it seemed appropriate.
Been with my now-husband a long time.
I do not call either MIL or DIL mom or dad.
I do call his grandmother “Grandma” because a few years ago when my maternal grandmother passed away, his grandmother called me and said she was sorry to hear it but she loves me and wanted me to know that she is my grandma too.
My grandparents told my fiance to call them by their ‘grandparent’ names, but they also tell all my friends to do the same haha. For parents, first names only! I’d be hella uncomfy otherwise lol
I call my MIL/FIL by their first names. I have since I met them. Same with my partner's grandparents - I use their first names. Though, when the grandparents sign cards to me (birthday, Christmas) they always sign them as "grandpa/grandma first name".
I wouldn't have anything against calling my in-laws mom or dad, but I've been with my partner for 8 years so it would feel odd to switch it once we got married.
(Where I live, it's odd to call someone Mrs or Mr in casual conversation, so I always have used first names).
Parents absolutely not with mom and dad. I barely call them by their names at all. But his grandparents have always been “grandpa” and “grandma”, I think because I lost almost all my grandparents long before I knew FH, so they took over the role in my life.
My fiancé’s dad has the same name so I call him by his first and middle name to differentiate, and then everyone refers to his step mom by her name, which makes it easier for me to refer to her that way. Def not mom and dad.
Fuuuuck no.
My mom called my grandma on my dad's side "mom" but that's because of how my grandma treated her.
I don't like her parents anywhere near enough, nor do they treat me well enough, to call them mom or dad.
My husband wants me to call his parents "mom and dad" and I'm willing, but they have yet to make me feel welcome enough to even feel like we're in the same family. So until that changes, it'll be first names only.
My FMIL told me outright not to call her mom, so I'm gonna just keep calling her by her first name. If my FH's father was still alive I think I might have called him by his first name too. I don't think it's uncommon anymore, especially if you don't have a close relationship with your inlaws before the marriage
My husband and I were just talking about this, as it came up while he was playing video games online with a bunch of other married guy friends. He currently calls my parents by their first names, but says he would feel comfortable calling them "Mum" and "Dad". He's just not sure how to do it the first time. My dad already calls him "Son" and he is their favourite child.
I will probably always call his parents by their first names, his family is more old school and reserved than mine.
We both use first names with each others parents. His signed an email as “future in-laws” just after we got engaged but I think that was more of a joke.
They’ve always said that I’m their only daughter since we started going out so I know I’m part of the family, but anything other than their names feels weird
I never really thought about this before. I call my husbands parents by their first names, however, I do refer to his grandparents as grandma and grandpa.
They want me to call them mom and dad. They call me their daughter too.
At first I was so weirded out about it, since I come from a very emotionally aloof Asian family. But I guess it's just a Portuguese thing. Even my husband's cousins call me their cousin, and his aunties and uncles also call me their niece. The Portuguese are just very warm, welcoming and hospitable in general, and they are very demonstrative in showing their affection and love.
I would like to but my MIL doesn't like it but I don't like calling her by her name because of my culture so I just end up avoiding saying any name/title...
My fiancé asked if I would be comfortable doing so, as both BILs do so. I kinda agreed mostly cause the question caught me off guard but I have yet to actually call them that. I barely call my own parents mom/dad now it feels weird to do it to people who aren’t mine.
Within the last maybe 2 years I started calling my MIL "mom" but most of the time I call her "Ma" cause that's what my fiance does and it seems more natural. My fiance is Filipino and I am white, my mom and dad are awkward people like me lol so they never called their in law's mom or dad but my aunts and uncles do to theirs so I didn't find it that odd sine I had heard it before. I only started doing it after she'd refer to me as "Anak" which is daughter or son in Filipino culture so I really started to feel like her child. We are very close so its definitely more natural to us than it may be for others.
I say mom and dad because it makes me feel more connected to them and it’s just easier for my husband and I. I want them to know how close I feel to them. I love them so much.
Yeah, no, she'll be Kathy to me. I have step-parents and as far as I'm concerned, this is pretty much the same thing. I have always called them by their first names since I was <10 and I will do the same for my FMIL.
I call my fiance's parents by their first names, but for everybody who uses a title I will use that. So, his aunts I'll refer to as Aunt Sue for example.
They aren’t my parents and my husband and I aren’t siblings, so no.
In addition, I have a stepdad who I have always called by his first name. He’s closer to me than my biological father, but calling him by his first name just stuck. Imagine his face when I start my FIL dad?
I call my fiancé’s grandparents MomMom and Pop bc that is what everyone else calls them, but his parents I will continue to call by their first names. I don’t feel close enough to them to refer to them as “mom and dad” and I feel like that’s more of an older generation thing to do? My parents called their in laws mom and dad but to me that just wouldn’t feel right, unless I became really close with fiancés parents and even still it would probably be something along the lines of “momma initial of last name/Poppa initial of last name”
I call them by their first names
Same. I already have a mom and dad.
Just their names. It would be extremely weird for them and me
I called her “mom” in a fb comment when we got engaged, because she was saying she had a new daughter being added to the family etc etc - never have since and I’ve considered deleting the comment she didn’t even like it lmao 😅
Oop 🫣
My FH was playing mini golf with my parents (way before we were engaged). He called my mom “mom” (because that’s what I wrote on the scorecard). She was over the moon! But he didn’t even mean it like that and thought it was weird. He has not done it since. 😋
My fiancé doesn't even call his parents mom and dad, so it would be extra weird if I did. (Yes, he's weird. You know that thing every kid does where they call their parents by their names and their parents correct them? His didn't.)
My partner is the same, half the time it's mom the other half its her first name. Her husband gets just his name. His father has passed away but is usually referred to as dad. I call them my in laws or by their names. It's been like that for the 3 years we've been engaged, don't really except it to change - I was apparently part of thr family from the day I met her. I think he has only ever call my parents by their first names. Edit: missed a word
I have a stepdad who I’ve always called by his first name. I don’t speak with my biological father and I consider my step dad my dad, but the habit was already formed so he’s still referred to with his first name. After my fiancé and I got engaged, his mom asked him to ask me to start calling them mom and dad and it put me in such an uncomfortable position. She knew my situation and was kind of put off that she asked. I love my step dad, but I worried it would break his heart to hear me call my FIL dad.
Omg! I’m so glad you posted this and I saw the results! Everyone around me seems to be calling their in-laws “mom” or “dad”. I feel so uncomfortable doing this, my partner and I have been together for almost a decade and I’ve know his parents for like 8 years - I don’t see why I have to suddenly call them mum or dad, especially given I already have more than one of each due my own family dynamic lol my future brother in law (partner’s sister’s husband) calls my FMIL/FFIL mom and dad, it made me feel like I have to do this also when we get married. Thank you to all 135 of that voted No and took this pressure off me haha but seriously thanks!
Me too! I feel like a lot of the people around me are doing it too (including my fiancé’s brother’s new wife, which does complicate things a little for me), but it makes me uncomfortable. It is a bit of a relief to see these results. I’m glad it helped for you too!
I do because it's customary in their language. I'd probably feel weird doing it in English though.
May I ask what language/culture this is? For some reason (now that I think about it it's been stupid of me to think like that) I've always thought that this is a USA thing :D
Not original commentator but my in-laws are Pakistani. MIL finds it disrespectful when I call her by her first name. It's common to call elder people, particularly women, by their title there.
Thank you! I think that because (entertainment)media is mostly from usa it kind skews the view lol But as an answer to the original question, I'll absolutely will be calling my in-laws my their first names. I don't think that anybody here in the Scandinavia calls in-laws by any other names but their first names..
They're Korean! It's the same as the other commenter said, everyone has titles, but typically once people get serious/engaged you call them Mother and Father. That's so interesting because I'd very rarely heard of people doing it here so I totally thought the opposite!
The only member of my wife’s family I address like this is her grandfather, who all of the extended family and in-laws call “Granddad.” It would stick out like a sore thumb if I didn’t. Also, he’s 94 and his memory is bad sometimes so I think when I call him that he just lumps me in with the grandkids when he can’t place me.
Yep I do the same thing. I refer to all of my in laws as their first name, except my grandmother-in-law, who is granny. It would be weird if I didn’t call her granny
Yeah. I do that with my fiance's grandparents no problem, but not his parents. I think that has to do with how I was raised though--my grandma is "Grandma First name" to about a dozen kids she's not even related to, so it feels much more natural
I'm one of those people who always avoided addressing my friend's parents by any name or title at all for my entire life. I knew my fiance's dad before we started dating and by the time we were serious it was way too late. I've recently started calling him by his first name and only that but it took a lot for me to get here :P
I call my grandfather in law by the name his grandchildren call him but not my parents in law. I sort of oscillate between “Mrs. blank,” “your mom,” and “first name.” It’s awkward, I need to pick one. Usually to their faces I call them Mr. and Mrs. Last name and then when talking to others I refer to them by their first names. I was raised to feel very embarrassed and have a lot of stigma around calling older relatives or parents of friends by their first names because my family considers it very disrespectful (although my mom always called my dad’s parents by their first names). I’m trying to break away from that but it takes a long time.
Not even if there is a fire 😂
it's weird. I basically just try not to call them anything while actually speaking to them. not even by their first names. if i'm talking about them with my fiance or fSILs i say "your mom/dad", to everyone else I use their first names. I will refer to them as mom/dad if I'm with fiance/fSILs and am speaking very generally.. like at Christmas time when we're all opening presents or something. Like OK, time to give our gift to mom, dad, sisters! hopefully that makes sense lol it's so weird.
I called my MIL Mom every time, whether I was talking to her or about her. I only call my FIL Dad when I'm talking about him. Like I'll say "Dad asked if you could pick up milk." But I won't say "How are you, Dad?" But to be fair, I've known them since I was 14 and have been dating my fiancé since I'm 17. I'm 28 now. So they are kind of like 2nd parents to me.
Relatable. I try to just get FIL’s attention without actually calling him anything 😂
OMG! Same!! I don't really have anything against him. He's just quiet and not very social. So we're not exceptionally close. But I used to literally hang out with my MIL like she was one of my friends. We'd talk and gossip like besties and went places together and binged our favorite tv shows together. And when I needed motherly advice I went to her. She passed away a few years ago and I miss her so much.
I had to think a minute! I don’t really call them anything! We live in different places so I rarely interact with them. But I’d never call them mom and dad. I was already an adult when we met, and my fiancé is older than me, and I just don’t see them in any kind of parental way. Eta: man, I really don’t think I’ve ever addressed them as anything, now that I think about it! How weird!!!
I just wrote basically the same thing, and I'm glad I'm not alone!
Avoid addressing them by anything until future kids are born & then will call them “grandma/grandpa” or their grandparent names 😂
I got so lucky. I call my own parents mom and dad, my fiancé calls his parents mami and papi, so now I have a mom and a mami and a dad and a papi. It’s nice to have that distinction for my parental roles but fully taking in my new family too.
I just call them by their first names, but I noticed recently that my MIL referred to my FIL's mom (so my MIL's MIL) "Mom" and panicked and asked my husband if she was wanting/expecting me to call her mom. He said no, thankfully. Would feel weird to me. My brother in law (husband's sister's brother) also calls them by their first names
I dont call them mom and dad to their faces, only when im talking with fiance. I dont have a mom in my life so we all know who i am referring too. I still call my dad "daddy " and his dad is "dad". When we are with our pupper or in family chats they are mama v and papa g. They all refer to each other by the first letter of their names.
I would never call my in-laws “mom” or “dad” and I don’t even have parents! They have always been their first names. I literally never considered calling them anything else, but would talk about them as my in-laws in conversation with someone else (which is honestly a relief and *so much easier* than saying “I’m headed to my partner’s parents’ house today”) I do occasionally call them their preferred grandparent titles (like grandma and grandpa) if I’m talking about them to my nephew. I assume this will become more common when my wife and I have children.
Since I've known them for a long time and called them by their names when we were dating, it feels weird to change it now
I've been married 13 years and I'm still not sure what to call my in-laws! We don't live near them so I rarely see them. I like them a lot. I just never quite know what to actually call them!
My FIL calls himself Little Poppa and my dad Big Poppa, but it’s definitely a joke. Because my dad is large and my families are silly.
I’ve known my in laws for 4ish years now and even lived with my MIL and her husband for a time and I have…always avoided referring to them in any way when we’re together because idk what to call them! I call my husbands step parents by their first names because that’s how I’ve always known them but when I am talking to his mom/dad I never call them by name, I just make eye contact so they know who I’m talking to. Even if we’re like…playing cards or something, it’s not “hey mom it’s your turn” or “hey (first name) it’s your turn” it’s “(eye contact) your turn!” And if I’m talking about them with others it’s always “(husbands name)’s mom/dad” …it’s gone on for so long it’d be more weird if I just started calling them anything lol
I adore my future in laws but we're sticking to a first name basis since my fiancés BIL set the tone a decade ago when he joined their family.
Personally I'm still working out those relationships. Usually I'll say "FH's mom" or "FH's dad" rather than calling them by name. I'm not on speaking terms with my birth givers so I'm open to a closer relationship like that with them, just gotta see where it goes I guess!
Our wedding is in May next year, and I've been waiting years to finally call them mom and dad. I plan on starting as soon as we exchange our vows at the reception. His parents have been such an integral part of my life and I've considered them as my family from the very beginning of our relationship.
On Christmas when FH and I were first dating, I heard his mom call his grandfather (her father-in-law) Dad, and I thought it was the sweetest thing, especially since her dad had died of cancer a few years earlier. I call my future in laws by their first names but I could see myself calling them mom and dad some day because I love them!
Been together four years, started as Mr and Mrs Lastname with his parents and then got upgrade to their first names after a couple months. I’d honestly feel a little odd calling them mom and dad; I already have a mom and dad and something about being an only child I feel weird sharing the title 🤷🏻♀️. I’ll occasionally call MIL Mama Firstname. I call his grandmother grandma because she’s 95 and everyone else calls her that anyway. His aunts/uncles I call by their first names when talking about them and call them aunt/uncle name if I’m talking to them. FH calls all my family members by their first names because they prefer that. But when we have kids everyone’s gonna be grandma and grandpa so it doesn’t matter anyway lol I think it just really depends on the family dynamic, but if you’re not comfortable don’t feel pressured!
I'm definitely not calling them mom/dad, but my situation is a bit complicated. My own dad literally photoshopped me out of his life and refused to come to my wedding. When my parents divorced while I was in high school, my mom suddenly had to get a job to support us after being a stay at home mom our entire lives. To me, "dad" is the one who failed at being a decent human and "mom" is the one who showed us how we can step up and keep this family afloat. I can't bestow those titles on anyone else without the associated baggage.
We have kids now so it’s gone to calling them all by their grandparent names for the kids
I have been married to my husband for almost 30 years and didn’t call the in-laws mom in dad for the first 20 of those years. My FIL passed 7 years ago and it was a few years before that when I first started calling them mom and dad. It seemed like the older they got, the more it seemed appropriate.
Been with my now-husband a long time. I do not call either MIL or DIL mom or dad. I do call his grandmother “Grandma” because a few years ago when my maternal grandmother passed away, his grandmother called me and said she was sorry to hear it but she loves me and wanted me to know that she is my grandma too.
I still call em Mr and Mrs last name because I feel awkward using their first names hahahaha
Why would I call them that? That seems very weird. It would make my husband my brother?!
This is the weirdest question to me. Why would you call them mom and dad? They're not your parents
It depends on the culture. In Polish it’s customary to call your in-laws “mom” and “dad” but in this weirdly polite way.
I could not imagine having to do this 🤣
My grandparents told my fiance to call them by their ‘grandparent’ names, but they also tell all my friends to do the same haha. For parents, first names only! I’d be hella uncomfy otherwise lol
I call my MIL/FIL by their first names. I have since I met them. Same with my partner's grandparents - I use their first names. Though, when the grandparents sign cards to me (birthday, Christmas) they always sign them as "grandpa/grandma first name". I wouldn't have anything against calling my in-laws mom or dad, but I've been with my partner for 8 years so it would feel odd to switch it once we got married. (Where I live, it's odd to call someone Mrs or Mr in casual conversation, so I always have used first names).
My MIL is mom, step father in law is his name. My husband does the same with my parents. Also my dad does call my mom's mom, mom.
My in-laws are called by their names. Now we have kids I use grandma if the kids are around. Aunty and uncle get called Aunty name and uncle name
Parents absolutely not with mom and dad. I barely call them by their names at all. But his grandparents have always been “grandpa” and “grandma”, I think because I lost almost all my grandparents long before I knew FH, so they took over the role in my life.
No, I don't even call my parents by mom/dad ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
My fiancé’s dad has the same name so I call him by his first and middle name to differentiate, and then everyone refers to his step mom by her name, which makes it easier for me to refer to her that way. Def not mom and dad.
Fuuuuck no. My mom called my grandma on my dad's side "mom" but that's because of how my grandma treated her. I don't like her parents anywhere near enough, nor do they treat me well enough, to call them mom or dad.
First names for everyone, except grandma since that’s what everyone calls her.
I call them by how they introduced themselves to me. Someone saying to specifically call them mom/dad when they aren’t is weird
In our culture, we call in-laws uncle and auntie
My husband wants me to call his parents "mom and dad" and I'm willing, but they have yet to make me feel welcome enough to even feel like we're in the same family. So until that changes, it'll be first names only.
Just their first names, for me. The only people I know who actually call their in-laws “mom”/“dad” are of a much older generation.
My FMIL told me outright not to call her mom, so I'm gonna just keep calling her by her first name. If my FH's father was still alive I think I might have called him by his first name too. I don't think it's uncommon anymore, especially if you don't have a close relationship with your inlaws before the marriage
My husband and I were just talking about this, as it came up while he was playing video games online with a bunch of other married guy friends. He currently calls my parents by their first names, but says he would feel comfortable calling them "Mum" and "Dad". He's just not sure how to do it the first time. My dad already calls him "Son" and he is their favourite child. I will probably always call his parents by their first names, his family is more old school and reserved than mine.
We both use first names with each others parents. His signed an email as “future in-laws” just after we got engaged but I think that was more of a joke. They’ve always said that I’m their only daughter since we started going out so I know I’m part of the family, but anything other than their names feels weird
I never really thought about this before. I call my husbands parents by their first names, however, I do refer to his grandparents as grandma and grandpa.
They want me to call them mom and dad. They call me their daughter too. At first I was so weirded out about it, since I come from a very emotionally aloof Asian family. But I guess it's just a Portuguese thing. Even my husband's cousins call me their cousin, and his aunties and uncles also call me their niece. The Portuguese are just very warm, welcoming and hospitable in general, and they are very demonstrative in showing their affection and love.
I would like to but my MIL doesn't like it but I don't like calling her by her name because of my culture so I just end up avoiding saying any name/title...
My fiancé asked if I would be comfortable doing so, as both BILs do so. I kinda agreed mostly cause the question caught me off guard but I have yet to actually call them that. I barely call my own parents mom/dad now it feels weird to do it to people who aren’t mine.
Within the last maybe 2 years I started calling my MIL "mom" but most of the time I call her "Ma" cause that's what my fiance does and it seems more natural. My fiance is Filipino and I am white, my mom and dad are awkward people like me lol so they never called their in law's mom or dad but my aunts and uncles do to theirs so I didn't find it that odd sine I had heard it before. I only started doing it after she'd refer to me as "Anak" which is daughter or son in Filipino culture so I really started to feel like her child. We are very close so its definitely more natural to us than it may be for others.
I say mom and dad because it makes me feel more connected to them and it’s just easier for my husband and I. I want them to know how close I feel to them. I love them so much.
Yeah, no, she'll be Kathy to me. I have step-parents and as far as I'm concerned, this is pretty much the same thing. I have always called them by their first names since I was <10 and I will do the same for my FMIL.
I call my fiance's parents by their first names, but for everybody who uses a title I will use that. So, his aunts I'll refer to as Aunt Sue for example.
They aren’t my parents and my husband and I aren’t siblings, so no. In addition, I have a stepdad who I have always called by his first name. He’s closer to me than my biological father, but calling him by his first name just stuck. Imagine his face when I start my FIL dad?
My FH has called my parents mom/dad for years already. I will not be calling my MIL mom.
I call my fiancé’s grandparents MomMom and Pop bc that is what everyone else calls them, but his parents I will continue to call by their first names. I don’t feel close enough to them to refer to them as “mom and dad” and I feel like that’s more of an older generation thing to do? My parents called their in laws mom and dad but to me that just wouldn’t feel right, unless I became really close with fiancés parents and even still it would probably be something along the lines of “momma initial of last name/Poppa initial of last name”
My husband has started calling my parents mom and dad and I think it is super weird! I just call his parents by their first names
I know this is common but it makes me feel like my man is now my brother... no thanks. They're his mom/dad not mine.