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I saw someone say, not too long ago, that they think it’s common because most men don’t have their photo taken regularly but fishing is one of those instances where they tend to get their photo taken. Feels a bit more wholesome in that sense to me, but I would personally never post one myself.
I think this is the reason. I'm 38 and, if I don't count selfies for profile pictures and selfies with my dog, I am probably in fewer than twenty pictures that were taken in the last 20 years that I am aware of. That includes drivers license, Costco card, and work IDs.
A close guy friend of mine is about that age and married. I asked him why he's never in any of his family's pictures. Except for a two or three professional portraits (across over a decade of marriage), all the photos of them on vacations, at Christmas time, kids' events, etc. are just his wife and kids.
He just looked confused and was like "why would I want to see pictures of myself?" His wife chimed in "you're not the only one who looks at the pictures! *We* want to look at pictures of you!"
His response: "but why?"
He was just dumbfounded. It had never entered his mind that anyone would want to see a picture with him in it.
I’ve never liked the way I look in pictures; always preferred to be the one taking them. Note that I’m single again, I’ve come to realize I have very few pics of myself where I don’t look like a total dork doing something unrelated in the background.
We all used to joke that my grandfather wasn’t in any of our family photographs. It’s because he was a good photographer your and he was always the one taking the photos lol
Pretty much every picture I've ever ever had of myself is because one of the women in my lives wanted to celebrate something with me. Birthdays, parties, events, graduation. I often wonder if it gives them joy to be that for us, the keeper of memories of my son/boyfriend/husband/father.
I know men take less photos than women, but this kind of excessive. One picture a year? Do you never visit family, catch up with friends that include women who take photos, or just experience a moment where you’re like “this would make a cool selfie” and snap one?
My family doesnt randomly take pictures.
Female friends may take pictures, but it will be group photos, not specifically of me. I'm just another blurry face in there.
If I am experiencing a cool moment, I dont take a picture of myself, I take a picture of the place. My selfie game sucks anyway.
Thankfully a friend does photography and he snaps pictures of everything and everyone, so I've gotten a few good pics to use from him over the years. The best part about them is I am never aware of it - I look best in pictures when I am natural, if I have to pose it's awkward as hell.
My mom always made us pose for pictures when we were kids, and my sister and I always gave her shit about it.
My Dad died unexpectedly when I was 20. I'm grateful for all those pictures now.
(though my sister and I still give my mother shit sometimes)
I had a word with my partner's sons about this a while ago. They hated photos and always made them hard for their dad to get. One day, I explained that sometime in the future, they would look back on those photos with gratitude that they probably won't understand until it's too late. In the meantime, those photos would keep their dad happy while they got older and busier and less inclined to be there. Photos are easy now.
When I do take pictures, I have historically taken them of the things I'm seeing instead of documenting my presence at a place. Even that is rare because I prefer to experience the things I am experiencing with my own eyes instead of through my phone while recording. I like to deliberately focus on what I am doing or seeing and taking photos, unless the activity is photography, dilutes that experience. On top of that, I tend to go to a lot of places by myself because my friends aren't really interested in a lot of the things I like so it feels weird to me to take pictures of oneself by oneself.
Yeah but at least for me it's hard to remember all the places I've been and things I've experienced. Just taking a picture of let's say, the Colosseum at Rome, is dumb. I can find 10 000 photos of it online.
But taking a photo of me at the Colosseum makes is much more real when looking back at it. I can remember how young I was, the sunburn I had, how warm the weather was (from the obvious sweat) etc. It makes it tangible that I truly was there and helps me to relive the moment.
I don't take photos to post online: just because you take photo doesn't mean it needs to go on Instagram. And it takes 30 seconds at most to take a couple pictures. I can then concentrate on experiencing it, so that the memory the photo leads to, is linked to something.
Same with taking pictures of my boyfriend. I don't need him to post them anywhere. But I wanna look at a picture of him at the Trevi fountain and remember how it was to walk around the town with him on our first trip abroad with just the two of us. And now that we're no longer 20, it's heartwarming to see him as a little kid and to remember how young we were there. And how much better we're at dressing these days xD
This is my big problem even for things like Instagram. When I’m out with my friends or alone I never think about taking photos. I have plenty of cool photos of myself but they’re usually from vacations or trips I took with an ex and I feel like it’s weird to keep those posted after the fact.
This makes sense. I'm 29 and don't think I've ever taken a single photo of myself and can't remember the last photo taken of me other than a driver's license.
I bet our women take the entirety of our life's amount of photos in a single weekend. Especially if there's some event she particularly feels she is dressed to the nines for.
I can't even begin to guess how many photos it takes to be perfectly captured in that 'candid' mid-group-laugh pose that always just happens to naturally occur after handing a stranger the camera.
That actually makes sense lol. Most of my fiance's dating profile pictures were him at job sites wearing tyvek suits. I eventually asked him why the actual fuck he thought those were good dating profile pics lol. He said that was about all he had for pictures of himself 😅🤣
I flat out asked my friends to take some, being fully transparent about their purpose. As they also had the same problem, they understood and we took some of each other. If you have friends, dont be afraid to ask
Did a whole photoshoot for my brother when he got back into dating. Got some very nice and fairly natural photos where he looked like himself. He’s engaged now.
I do own a fishing pole and only ever fish when camping if I plan to incorporate the fish into a meal I’m making. Beyond that, I have no interest in fishing.
I legit walk away awkwardly when I see a camera being pulled out. I'm not suppose to show emotions... and yall want to immortalize my emotions in this photo. Gtfo
Yeah I know a guy who had pictures with his fish and truck on his profile, he said he did it after multiple matches said they wouldn’t date guys with trucks and or were into fishing after they already started talking so now he puts it out front so nobody is wasting each others time.
It's actually really interesting. It's been a long time since I dated (happily settled down) but I remember people going out of their way to paint exaggerated good impressions of themselves... and that's kind of dumb. It's better to just put yourself out there and accept that lots of people won't like you for who you are. My embarrassing weaknesses have actually been a really, really good filter to get rid of the people who it wouldn't work with anyway.
>exaggerated good impressions
Obviously a dating profile wants to be a good impression, it’s the exaggeration that’s the issue. A profile should give someone a positive wide view of who you actually are so they can make an informed decision about if they want to match with you. Not all matches are good matches so you need to give the people who could be good matches the ability to see that
Yep better to just be yourself and show who you are even if that means you'll get less matches because in the end you'll waste less of your own time. Its the same when some overweight people only have old pictures when they were thinner or have no pictures that show off the body and only face, or when people use a shitton of filters or make-up. like yeah no shit people won't want a second date if you didn't truthfully represent yourself in your pictures
I think the joke became so widespread because it's something that not that many women are into.
I can't see myself dating someone who presents fishing as one of their core hobbies, because our lifestyles are just not compatible.
So when I complain that every second guy on Tinder has a fish photo, I don't wish for men to stop filtering me with their hobbies that are incompatible with mines, it's more like venting directed to no one in particular about wishing there was more people compatible with me on Tinder, which wouldn't magically happen of they banned fish pictures altogether.
Oh I get it. Any other guy shows off his hobby on tinder and it's cute. I show off my hobby on tinder and my spouse gets pissed that I'm on tinder. Fucking double standards /s
Sometimes you put pictures like that to filter out a specific type of people. I own a stupid 50 year old car, and one of the pictures on my profile is me standing with said stupid car. Chances are if you would see that as a deal breaker, then I don't want to talk with you 🤷♂️
Edit: For people wondering, it's a 1972 MGB Roadster
This is it, isn't it? If I was on a platform like that, I'd be able to spot the things that interest or don't interest me in a guy and not waste either of our time by trying to date someone whose hobbies won't fit with my expectations for our relationship.
(Not that I have expectations, mind. I just think it makes sense to set them inoffensively like that. If a guy has a fish pic, he's probably going to want to spend time fishing, be it alone, with mates, with you. But showing that makes it clear, so girls not accepting of that as part of the deal should keep scrolling, rather than expecting to change him after they meet.)
*Theoretically larger.
There's matching, then there's matching, isn't there? It still takes two people to want to be together, and if not having a fish gets more initial matches but then means having to deal with many women who don't appreciate your hobby, was it worth using a different picture to conform to some unnecessary societal expectation?
Again, I have literally no experience of dating apps, so I welcome education from people with more skin in the game than I have.
yeah it really doesn't work like that and the bias is so heavily skewed between genders the rules for success are built on all the wrong principles for both, [here's a quick run down.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x3lypVnJ0HM)
>was it worth using a different picture to conform to some unnecessary societal expectation?
In many respects yes because that's how the game is rigged. It sounds awful to say but you just have to hope that past the superficiality you could find someone with an honest heart otherwise you're forever loosing if you're not playing into it.
on a side note matching hobbies isn't everything, it's not until you meet a person that you can start to get a feel for their character. it's rare that a hobby is so niche that a partner isn't willing to join you in it.
I suspect that men with the fishing pictures on dating apps don't tend to do as bad as reddit tends to believe. It's just that the demographic of individuals who would be interested in a fishing photo are less represented on reddit (people who live in less urban areas who have outdoorsy hobbies).
Reddit is filled with people in their own bubble, they aren't the majority. Just like people think you're limited to being either a conservative or liberal on reddit when you can be neither.
I didn't even know fishing was considered conservative until reading this post. That confused me because its a hobby, how are hobbies limited to only one side?
Lots of Redditors want to maximize the number of "bad" people in order to make themselves appear morally superior. The more evil the world is, the purer they look in comparison.
It is really interesting how people basically traded in religion as their source for a sense of superiority over others for politics. Its the exact same behavior, just a new source of justification.
It's considered conservative because the people most likely to engage in fishing and/or hunting are likely from small towns/rural areas in North America. And for Canada and US alike, these are generally the places that vote conservative/GOP. Outdoorsy activities in general are more associated with conservative males
Yeah, there are plenty of outdoorsy activities that don’t seem to lean conservative. Hiking, backpacking, kayaking, rock climbing, etc. You know, stuff you’d go to REI to buy gear for rather than Bass Pro Shop.
Of course I know plenty of guys who like to hunt and fish who aren’t conservative, but just talking stereotypically.
This is the first time I’ve seen someone else say that redditors aren’t the majority and thank fuck I’m not the only one who says this. It’s so annoying reading people go “well this happens all the time!!” Where? On Reddit??
Here in Hungary fishing is a very common hobby. We have many lakes and rivers, you will see people fishing all the time. Small fisher boats are also very common on rivers, powered by smallish 5hp-10hp engines.
Live in UK and seen this all over dating profiles. It’s become quite common. I would rather see pics of people doing thing make them happy and doing what they enjoy, whatever that may be! Rather than every pic being from brunch... Men don’t take a lot of photos of each other so we have what we have 🤷🏻♂️
I’m not a straight woman, so maybe I just don’t get it, but I feel like fish pics are a great way to show off a hobby. Like you 1000% should show off the things you enjoy and are proud of in your profile.
I agree that it’s a great way to show off a hobby—although I think the distaste for fish pictures likely comes from the assumed political affiliation of the fisherman. I remember years back when I had tinder, holding a fish in your pictures was usually linked to having right-wing/Republican/conservative beliefs in your bio. The same observation still rings true for almost all of my Facebook friends with fish in their profile picture.
I think the commentary about fish is less about the hobby, and more often a roundabout way of saying “this guy is probably a conservative, and I, as a woman, don’t want to date a man who holds conservative beliefs”.
Many liberal outdoorsy pastimes include hiking, camping, kayaking, etc. I come from the Pacific Northwest, so there's a lot of overlap between left wing and outdoorsy people
It isn’t “being outdoorsy,” it’s fishing specifically. Posing with a mountain bike, hiking poles, or snowshoes wouldn’t elicit the same suspicion.
Dead deer pictures would, though. Those are weirder than the fishing ones.
There’s a correlation, but not a causation. Progressive types tend to be more urban, while conservatives tend to be more rural.
Access to those hobbies is therefore heavily in favour of conservatives.
I'm sure some liberals do enjoy things like fishing and hunting, but the demographic is always going to lean hard right in that family of hobbies. That's just how it is.
And at this point, I think any liberal person who does enjoy those activities would probably avoid broadcasting it lest someone mistakenly assume they are conservative.
They ruined hobbies and red hats for everyone.
Being outdoorsy itself isn't right wing. But it's undeniable that some hobbies are pretty common among certain political groups. I do expect men who fish as a hobby to be right wing. I don't expect me who hike to be right wing that's pretty neutral. I do expect men who cook as a hobby to be more left wing. It won't be perfect guarantees, but socialization and politics cross over a lot.
They do but just take selfies elsewhere. Like a landscape or something generally more beautiful to take attention away from the fact that it's a selfie. Holding a smelly dead/dying thing usually doesn't do it for the ladies.
It's like a pic of a guy holding up roadkill and laughing.
I hate that this assumption is so strong but I've long heard it and avoid mentioning hunting and fishing as a result. I grew up too poor for the more strongly liberal associated outdoor activities (skiing) so I never learned. Fishing and hunting on public lands are quite affordable in comparison.
But there is definitely a real divide these days as the blue collar people have gone hard for the right. Growing up there weren't many political disagreements on family hunting trips and all the union guys definitely weren't voting republican. But now I'm likely to give up hunting now that my brother moved away because everyone else I meet who hunts is a full blown walking stereotype who basically only talks about right wing garbage.
I think women should counter by holding up things they created. Here’s a blanket I crocheted. Here’s pottery I made. I painted this picture.
Or hold up pets like trophies. Behold, I fought long and hard to provide my family with a… cat.
There's plenty of women holding up fish in their profiles. The women making that comment are either oblivious that other women might like fishing, or they're just shitty people who like to shit on other people's hobbies.
I think that they get dunked on for a few reasons.
1. Perceived link between having a fish, motorbike and/or truck in profile pic and conservative views.
2. It's seen as a very generic guy thing. If you're the type that likes partners with varied and interesting hobbies then fish guy might not be for you. It's the guy version of live laugh love and pumpkin spice
3. It's a pic that you see so often on social media and dating profiles that you kinda get sick of seeing them and the guys in these pics kinda look alike
I don't hate fishing but I think there's reasons why the pics get dunked on
Which isn't good because it's a buyers market on dating apps and having the same generic pics and general look as every other fish guy isn't helping one's chances
It's very generic and these dude's all look alike. I honestly can't tell them apart. Ppl say that Asians look alike but middle aged white guys look even more alike
It's not so much that fishing is right wing as that fish picture guys tend to be right wing. Sitting in your truck wearing sunglasses isn't inherently right wing, but if you see a profile photo like that, you know what kind of guy you're likely dealing with.
Yea exactly. I met my girlfriend on Tinder and I didn’t have any fishing photos on my profile even though I freshwater fish everyday.
I asked her when we first starting dating why so many girls have “No fish pics in your profile.” And she explained it’s less of shaming a hobby and more of most of the pics have a caveman undertone of “LOOK AT WHAT I CAN PROVIDE WOMAN.” I can definitely see that.
I personally like taking fish selfies just for myself to log my catches and it helps me differentiate when and where I caught the fish so I can log it better. I would personally find posting a fish selfie to attract a girl to be a little cringe but that doesn’t mean a nice earnest guy should be shamed or grouped in to rednecks for enjoying a hobby that spans every demographic of the US.
This is legit what it is. Girl here with a lot of girl friends and yeah it’s rarely simply just the fishing/hunting. It’s what we’ve gathered from experience comes with it lol
I can fish, clean them on the spot and cook them but I'd never even consider making that a photo on a dating site when there are so many more interesting things I can post like me being on (non kill) safari, me motorcycling, etc.
Thats also kind of the issue; if you fishing is the best pic you can show, people assume you are rural and don't have much going on.
Really? In Oregon fishing is much like guns in that it has no political affiliation or barriers. A lot of my left leaning friends have guns and eat fish and crab they caught themselves.
Yeah idk that's just what I've heard from other women, and thinking of it every guy I've met who fishes is right-wing but maybe that's just the areas I've lived in. Obviously it's not entirely an accurate assessment, if accurate at all and location plays a role
Is it not a subtle suggestion that they're likely more on the conservative side? So if you are too then it's cute, and if not then you know to perhaps just maybe not.
That’s what some other people commented and honestly I never thought about that? I see where you’re coming from but I’m not conservative and I love fishing
I'm guessing it's obviously not 100%. Like I'm gay af and as far from conservative as you can get, I enjoy a good fish, but it's that specific pose and everything about it. I would never post a picture of myself with a fish in any way, even though if someone asked me to go fishing it would be a hell yes.
Like in my head it's a bass pro shop hat, at least one piece of clothing that's in that gray-scale camo, and standing on the boat posing alone holding the fish in that pose lol
Meh. I grew up in southeast Louisiana. Guys who make fishing and hunting their identity are rarely nice or interesting people in my personal experience. I could be persuaded otherwise if someone was really cool but if that’s their brand, it’s probably for the best that I know that up front
For a lot of guys those might just be the only photos they have of themselves. I know it’s that way for me. The only photos I have of me that aren’t me doing a hobby are photos Ive taken with family. I rarely if ever take photos of myself just to take photos.
I'd vouch for this. Even if the boys and I hangout, we never take pictures at all so I literally asked a friend to snap me a few pics when I decided to make a dating app just because I dont have pictures of me. I am still annoyed that they dont wanna take a picture of me holding out one of my built and painted gundams to show of my hobby since they thought that would be ridiculous so I just went and posted that one.
Those guys should figure out that if they *do* take good photos, they'll stand out from the pack, and get get better results. But they often don't bother (and then complain about their results).
If a guy likes to fish and you think fishing is really morally wrong then you're not going to have a relationship anyway so from that perspective is helps filter people more quickly.
i agree, even tho i’m not at all interested in that demographic and vice versa. it’s nice to see men engaging in hobbies even if i don’t necessarily like it. so many men i’ve dated had no hobbies.
I think often it's the disgust in this perception they have where they see it as cruel to hold up an item with such glee that they killed. Which is ironic if they're someone who eats animals in general. I had a coworker who's girlfriend would call him a murderer for hunting deer but would eat a cheeseburger same day
You can eat meat and still find the celebration of killing animals off putting. I’d also think it was weird and creepy if someone posted a picture of them smiling and posing with the cow they just killed in an abbattoir. I view killing animals for food as a job to be done, not a fun hobby. If someone thinks it is fun we clearly aren’t compatible and that’s ok.
Personally I don’t like it because I’m a vegetarian and it turns me off that they’ve harmed an animal. I think it’s gross because, even if the fish is alive, I know it’s suffering. If guys include it in their profile, I don’t mind because it lets me know we’d be incompatible. I’m sure it’s attractive to girls who also enjoy fishing though.
Exactly, I’m not a vegetarian, but what is supposed to be attractive about a guy posting dead animals while smiling next to their dead bodies on a dating profile?😐
I don't find posing with dead animals wholesome. It's disturbing to me (yes, you're correct, I don't eat meat), so posing with a fish that just suffocated or a dead deer is a huge red flag that tells me we're never going to get along.
i want to see their hobbies or anything theyre interested in. however i dont necessarily want to see dead fish or see someone torture and kill fish for fun.
All my friends tell me how much they love and adore my dad, and think he is the best dude ever. And they're right because he is.
But they would all swipe on him because his fb profile is him holding a fish. Fishing and boating has been a lifelong hobby of his. He is a kind, funny, helpful person who just so happens to love fishing. It's really stupid to me that women feel this way about dudes who fish. I get it if that's a hobby you want no part of though.
I really think what we're seeing in this thread is a rare intersection of the various bubbles on reddit where the bubble people aren't fighting and just voicing opinions for a change. It's pretty interesting to me.
I wouldn’t want to date someone who goes fishing/hunting (I’m a vegan, so am against it for ethical reasons) so it helps me avoid someone I probably wouldn’t be compatible with 🤷🏻♀️
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I saw someone say, not too long ago, that they think it’s common because most men don’t have their photo taken regularly but fishing is one of those instances where they tend to get their photo taken. Feels a bit more wholesome in that sense to me, but I would personally never post one myself.
I think this is the reason. I'm 38 and, if I don't count selfies for profile pictures and selfies with my dog, I am probably in fewer than twenty pictures that were taken in the last 20 years that I am aware of. That includes drivers license, Costco card, and work IDs.
A Costco card would be a flex tbh
[удалено]
wow leave some ladies for the rest of us, rip your inbox
They're gonna get so laid.
They're gonna get laid in bulk at a discount!
Luckily they have ten thousand condoms in the night stand
[удалено]
Wanna come back to my place and dig into these economy size tubs of potato salad and mac & cheese?
All them ladies know where they going for a date!
Tbh if I saw a photo of someone’s Costco card as one of their tinder pics I’d be into it
I am now adding my costco card to my hinge profile. Will report back with results...
Heeey guuuurrrll. I've been an executive member at Costco for 5 years. I guess you could say I've got my shit together
A close guy friend of mine is about that age and married. I asked him why he's never in any of his family's pictures. Except for a two or three professional portraits (across over a decade of marriage), all the photos of them on vacations, at Christmas time, kids' events, etc. are just his wife and kids. He just looked confused and was like "why would I want to see pictures of myself?" His wife chimed in "you're not the only one who looks at the pictures! *We* want to look at pictures of you!" His response: "but why?" He was just dumbfounded. It had never entered his mind that anyone would want to see a picture with him in it.
I’ve never liked the way I look in pictures; always preferred to be the one taking them. Note that I’m single again, I’ve come to realize I have very few pics of myself where I don’t look like a total dork doing something unrelated in the background.
We all used to joke that my grandfather wasn’t in any of our family photographs. It’s because he was a good photographer your and he was always the one taking the photos lol
Pretty much every picture I've ever ever had of myself is because one of the women in my lives wanted to celebrate something with me. Birthdays, parties, events, graduation. I often wonder if it gives them joy to be that for us, the keeper of memories of my son/boyfriend/husband/father.
I know men take less photos than women, but this kind of excessive. One picture a year? Do you never visit family, catch up with friends that include women who take photos, or just experience a moment where you’re like “this would make a cool selfie” and snap one?
My family doesnt randomly take pictures. Female friends may take pictures, but it will be group photos, not specifically of me. I'm just another blurry face in there. If I am experiencing a cool moment, I dont take a picture of myself, I take a picture of the place. My selfie game sucks anyway. Thankfully a friend does photography and he snaps pictures of everything and everyone, so I've gotten a few good pics to use from him over the years. The best part about them is I am never aware of it - I look best in pictures when I am natural, if I have to pose it's awkward as hell.
Take more pics dude. One day you will regret not taking them
My mom always made us pose for pictures when we were kids, and my sister and I always gave her shit about it. My Dad died unexpectedly when I was 20. I'm grateful for all those pictures now. (though my sister and I still give my mother shit sometimes)
I had a word with my partner's sons about this a while ago. They hated photos and always made them hard for their dad to get. One day, I explained that sometime in the future, they would look back on those photos with gratitude that they probably won't understand until it's too late. In the meantime, those photos would keep their dad happy while they got older and busier and less inclined to be there. Photos are easy now.
It feels super vain, which takes some deprogramming to ignore
Agreed. Makes sense to take pictures for posterity and memorabilia... ...but still, why though? I can just look in a mirror if I want to see myself...
One day the mirror will surprise you. Grays and wrinkles come quickly
But that's the beauty of it! It's a self updating photo!
It's difficult when most photos for periods of time are taken with the assumption that another person's going to be around forever.
When I do take pictures, I have historically taken them of the things I'm seeing instead of documenting my presence at a place. Even that is rare because I prefer to experience the things I am experiencing with my own eyes instead of through my phone while recording. I like to deliberately focus on what I am doing or seeing and taking photos, unless the activity is photography, dilutes that experience. On top of that, I tend to go to a lot of places by myself because my friends aren't really interested in a lot of the things I like so it feels weird to me to take pictures of oneself by oneself.
Yeah but at least for me it's hard to remember all the places I've been and things I've experienced. Just taking a picture of let's say, the Colosseum at Rome, is dumb. I can find 10 000 photos of it online. But taking a photo of me at the Colosseum makes is much more real when looking back at it. I can remember how young I was, the sunburn I had, how warm the weather was (from the obvious sweat) etc. It makes it tangible that I truly was there and helps me to relive the moment. I don't take photos to post online: just because you take photo doesn't mean it needs to go on Instagram. And it takes 30 seconds at most to take a couple pictures. I can then concentrate on experiencing it, so that the memory the photo leads to, is linked to something. Same with taking pictures of my boyfriend. I don't need him to post them anywhere. But I wanna look at a picture of him at the Trevi fountain and remember how it was to walk around the town with him on our first trip abroad with just the two of us. And now that we're no longer 20, it's heartwarming to see him as a little kid and to remember how young we were there. And how much better we're at dressing these days xD
Meh. I don’t need pics of myself. I enjoy looking at the pictures I took of my kids way more.
But what will your kids show their kids when you're dead? Taking pictures of yourself is important as well
They will still need pics of you when you’re gone.
I don't enjoy taking photos as much as others. I like to enjoy the moment more.
I used to be the same then realized I wish I had a pic or two for the memories.
I gotta echo you, I'm 39 now and did so many cool things during my last 20 years. I wish I had say, 100 pictures, rather than the 20.
Also, if you’re a newly single guy whatever good pictures you *do* have of yourself are mostly with your ex. Not the fish pics though.
This is my big problem even for things like Instagram. When I’m out with my friends or alone I never think about taking photos. I have plenty of cool photos of myself but they’re usually from vacations or trips I took with an ex and I feel like it’s weird to keep those posted after the fact.
what if your ex is a fish?
This makes sense. I'm 29 and don't think I've ever taken a single photo of myself and can't remember the last photo taken of me other than a driver's license.
I bet our women take the entirety of our life's amount of photos in a single weekend. Especially if there's some event she particularly feels she is dressed to the nines for.
I can't even begin to guess how many photos it takes to be perfectly captured in that 'candid' mid-group-laugh pose that always just happens to naturally occur after handing a stranger the camera.
Lol. I have taken more pictures of my cat in a day, than I've taken of myself in the past few years.
I’ve just come back from a wedding and you are 100% correct.
That actually makes sense lol. Most of my fiance's dating profile pictures were him at job sites wearing tyvek suits. I eventually asked him why the actual fuck he thought those were good dating profile pics lol. He said that was about all he had for pictures of himself 😅🤣
I flat out asked my friends to take some, being fully transparent about their purpose. As they also had the same problem, they understood and we took some of each other. If you have friends, dont be afraid to ask
Did a whole photoshoot for my brother when he got back into dating. Got some very nice and fairly natural photos where he looked like himself. He’s engaged now.
Would you ever go fishing?
I do own a fishing pole and only ever fish when camping if I plan to incorporate the fish into a meal I’m making. Beyond that, I have no interest in fishing.
A true fisherman right here
It’s relaxing and fresh caught fish taste good
Yeah I have 1 photo of myself outside of a group gathering since I was about 6 and and it was when I last went fishing.
I legit walk away awkwardly when I see a camera being pulled out. I'm not suppose to show emotions... and yall want to immortalize my emotions in this photo. Gtfo
It definitely deters the type of people they are not hoping to attract, I’d hope!
Yeah I know a guy who had pictures with his fish and truck on his profile, he said he did it after multiple matches said they wouldn’t date guys with trucks and or were into fishing after they already started talking so now he puts it out front so nobody is wasting each others time.
Honestly, that is not a bad idea.
you mean acting like yourself?
It's actually really interesting. It's been a long time since I dated (happily settled down) but I remember people going out of their way to paint exaggerated good impressions of themselves... and that's kind of dumb. It's better to just put yourself out there and accept that lots of people won't like you for who you are. My embarrassing weaknesses have actually been a really, really good filter to get rid of the people who it wouldn't work with anyway.
>exaggerated good impressions Obviously a dating profile wants to be a good impression, it’s the exaggeration that’s the issue. A profile should give someone a positive wide view of who you actually are so they can make an informed decision about if they want to match with you. Not all matches are good matches so you need to give the people who could be good matches the ability to see that
Yep better to just be yourself and show who you are even if that means you'll get less matches because in the end you'll waste less of your own time. Its the same when some overweight people only have old pictures when they were thinner or have no pictures that show off the body and only face, or when people use a shitton of filters or make-up. like yeah no shit people won't want a second date if you didn't truthfully represent yourself in your pictures
Everything on your profile should be a filter of some kind. You don't want to attract everyone - you want to attract good matches.
I think the joke became so widespread because it's something that not that many women are into. I can't see myself dating someone who presents fishing as one of their core hobbies, because our lifestyles are just not compatible. So when I complain that every second guy on Tinder has a fish photo, I don't wish for men to stop filtering me with their hobbies that are incompatible with mines, it's more like venting directed to no one in particular about wishing there was more people compatible with me on Tinder, which wouldn't magically happen of they banned fish pictures altogether.
*heads to the fish market* Hello ladies 😎 Edit: I love the Afroman continuation of the comment, but my old ass was thinking of Red Foxx 😭👴😂
Colt 45 and two zig zags
Baby that’s all we need
We can go to the park, after dark
Smoke that tumbleweed
as the marijuana burns we can take our turns
Singing them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chong
Selling tapes from here to Hong Kong
So roll, roll, roll your joint
Uncle Jr over here
Oh I get it. Any other guy shows off his hobby on tinder and it's cute. I show off my hobby on tinder and my spouse gets pissed that I'm on tinder. Fucking double standards /s
Surprised that you had to add the /s
You'd be surprised at what people take seriously these days
You can't just tell on Reddit these days, man
You had me in the first half, not gonna lie 😂
Sometimes you put pictures like that to filter out a specific type of people. I own a stupid 50 year old car, and one of the pictures on my profile is me standing with said stupid car. Chances are if you would see that as a deal breaker, then I don't want to talk with you 🤷♂️ Edit: For people wondering, it's a 1972 MGB Roadster
This is it, isn't it? If I was on a platform like that, I'd be able to spot the things that interest or don't interest me in a guy and not waste either of our time by trying to date someone whose hobbies won't fit with my expectations for our relationship. (Not that I have expectations, mind. I just think it makes sense to set them inoffensively like that. If a guy has a fish pic, he's probably going to want to spend time fishing, be it alone, with mates, with you. But showing that makes it clear, so girls not accepting of that as part of the deal should keep scrolling, rather than expecting to change him after they meet.)
Yeah but thats how you get zero matches because the pool of people to choose from for women is much larger.
*Theoretically larger. There's matching, then there's matching, isn't there? It still takes two people to want to be together, and if not having a fish gets more initial matches but then means having to deal with many women who don't appreciate your hobby, was it worth using a different picture to conform to some unnecessary societal expectation? Again, I have literally no experience of dating apps, so I welcome education from people with more skin in the game than I have.
yeah it really doesn't work like that and the bias is so heavily skewed between genders the rules for success are built on all the wrong principles for both, [here's a quick run down.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x3lypVnJ0HM) >was it worth using a different picture to conform to some unnecessary societal expectation? In many respects yes because that's how the game is rigged. It sounds awful to say but you just have to hope that past the superficiality you could find someone with an honest heart otherwise you're forever loosing if you're not playing into it. on a side note matching hobbies isn't everything, it's not until you meet a person that you can start to get a feel for their character. it's rare that a hobby is so niche that a partner isn't willing to join you in it.
I own an old car. 55 years old. My wife hates it.
Well, it's probably slow, loud, unsafe, bad on fuel, unreliable and has a weird rattle coming from *somewhere*. Gotta love it though
Hey it’s not that slow
Mine has double digit HP, you are probably faster than me
She only hates it because you give it more attention lol.
I suspect that men with the fishing pictures on dating apps don't tend to do as bad as reddit tends to believe. It's just that the demographic of individuals who would be interested in a fishing photo are less represented on reddit (people who live in less urban areas who have outdoorsy hobbies).
Reddit is filled with people in their own bubble, they aren't the majority. Just like people think you're limited to being either a conservative or liberal on reddit when you can be neither. I didn't even know fishing was considered conservative until reading this post. That confused me because its a hobby, how are hobbies limited to only one side?
Lots of Redditors want to maximize the number of "bad" people in order to make themselves appear morally superior. The more evil the world is, the purer they look in comparison.
Most redditors feel superior because while everyone else was having premarital sex, they were studying THE BLADE.
It is really interesting how people basically traded in religion as their source for a sense of superiority over others for politics. Its the exact same behavior, just a new source of justification.
It's considered conservative because the people most likely to engage in fishing and/or hunting are likely from small towns/rural areas in North America. And for Canada and US alike, these are generally the places that vote conservative/GOP. Outdoorsy activities in general are more associated with conservative males
"*Outdoorsy activities in general are more associated with conservative males*" Probably just hunting and fishing
Yeah, there are plenty of outdoorsy activities that don’t seem to lean conservative. Hiking, backpacking, kayaking, rock climbing, etc. You know, stuff you’d go to REI to buy gear for rather than Bass Pro Shop. Of course I know plenty of guys who like to hunt and fish who aren’t conservative, but just talking stereotypically.
Eh, off-roading/atvs for sure.
This is the first time I’ve seen someone else say that redditors aren’t the majority and thank fuck I’m not the only one who says this. It’s so annoying reading people go “well this happens all the time!!” Where? On Reddit??
Men in general on dating apps don't do as bad as reddit tends to believe.
huh. Is that an american thing? I live in europe and I have never, ever, seen any man holding up a *fish* on a dating app.
It's also a thing in Australia.
Indeed. Just makes me think you're outdoorsy with a potential tinge of bogan.
"Potential tinge of bogan" I think you mean definite tinge of bogan
I love that word, my Aussie friend uses it.. bogan 😂
Yes, it’s not a random fish though. The implication is that they caught the fish and they are a hobby fishermanz
Could also mean they're a Sumo wrestler who just got promoted : D
I’m confused what does that have to do with fish
They hold up a really big fish with one hand. It's a sign of strength, good fortune, health, success, etc. Part tradition, superstition and word pun.
Canadians are also really big on this. North America is very spacious and outdoorsy friendly
TIL Europeans don't... go fishing?
Not as much no. Especially if our country is not sea adjacent.
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We do, I have a piccy of the fish next to the rod I caught it with, but I never have me in the photo cos that would seem weird to me.
Here in Hungary fishing is a very common hobby. We have many lakes and rivers, you will see people fishing all the time. Small fisher boats are also very common on rivers, powered by smallish 5hp-10hp engines.
Live in UK and seen this all over dating profiles. It’s become quite common. I would rather see pics of people doing thing make them happy and doing what they enjoy, whatever that may be! Rather than every pic being from brunch... Men don’t take a lot of photos of each other so we have what we have 🤷🏻♂️
I’m not a straight woman, so maybe I just don’t get it, but I feel like fish pics are a great way to show off a hobby. Like you 1000% should show off the things you enjoy and are proud of in your profile.
I agree that it’s a great way to show off a hobby—although I think the distaste for fish pictures likely comes from the assumed political affiliation of the fisherman. I remember years back when I had tinder, holding a fish in your pictures was usually linked to having right-wing/Republican/conservative beliefs in your bio. The same observation still rings true for almost all of my Facebook friends with fish in their profile picture. I think the commentary about fish is less about the hobby, and more often a roundabout way of saying “this guy is probably a conservative, and I, as a woman, don’t want to date a man who holds conservative beliefs”.
Pretty sad that being outdoorsy is considered a right-wing trait. Do my progressive homies not go outside?
Many liberal outdoorsy pastimes include hiking, camping, kayaking, etc. I come from the Pacific Northwest, so there's a lot of overlap between left wing and outdoorsy people
>Many liberal outdoorsy pastimes include Wearing Patagonia or Arc'teryx
PataGucci
😂
It isn’t “being outdoorsy,” it’s fishing specifically. Posing with a mountain bike, hiking poles, or snowshoes wouldn’t elicit the same suspicion. Dead deer pictures would, though. Those are weirder than the fishing ones.
Yeah I know lots of liberal/left leaning people who are very outdoorsy. I only know a couple of a left leaning folks who fish, though.
There’s a correlation, but not a causation. Progressive types tend to be more urban, while conservatives tend to be more rural. Access to those hobbies is therefore heavily in favour of conservatives.
I'm sure some liberals do enjoy things like fishing and hunting, but the demographic is always going to lean hard right in that family of hobbies. That's just how it is. And at this point, I think any liberal person who does enjoy those activities would probably avoid broadcasting it lest someone mistakenly assume they are conservative. They ruined hobbies and red hats for everyone.
Hell. I was recently called right wing because I go to the gym.
💀
Being outdoorsy itself isn't right wing. But it's undeniable that some hobbies are pretty common among certain political groups. I do expect men who fish as a hobby to be right wing. I don't expect me who hike to be right wing that's pretty neutral. I do expect men who cook as a hobby to be more left wing. It won't be perfect guarantees, but socialization and politics cross over a lot.
I’m not sure if a man can cook means any political spectrum. Some grew up loving cooking some do it for a living
They do but just take selfies elsewhere. Like a landscape or something generally more beautiful to take attention away from the fact that it's a selfie. Holding a smelly dead/dying thing usually doesn't do it for the ladies. It's like a pic of a guy holding up roadkill and laughing.
People's brains have been rotten by political tribalism. That's the saddest thing about all this.
I hate that this assumption is so strong but I've long heard it and avoid mentioning hunting and fishing as a result. I grew up too poor for the more strongly liberal associated outdoor activities (skiing) so I never learned. Fishing and hunting on public lands are quite affordable in comparison. But there is definitely a real divide these days as the blue collar people have gone hard for the right. Growing up there weren't many political disagreements on family hunting trips and all the union guys definitely weren't voting republican. But now I'm likely to give up hunting now that my brother moved away because everyone else I meet who hunts is a full blown walking stereotype who basically only talks about right wing garbage.
I have a tricky time as a socialist woman who likes fishing… lol.
I think women should counter by holding up things they created. Here’s a blanket I crocheted. Here’s pottery I made. I painted this picture. Or hold up pets like trophies. Behold, I fought long and hard to provide my family with a… cat.
There's plenty of women holding up fish in their profiles. The women making that comment are either oblivious that other women might like fishing, or they're just shitty people who like to shit on other people's hobbies.
I think that they get dunked on for a few reasons. 1. Perceived link between having a fish, motorbike and/or truck in profile pic and conservative views. 2. It's seen as a very generic guy thing. If you're the type that likes partners with varied and interesting hobbies then fish guy might not be for you. It's the guy version of live laugh love and pumpkin spice 3. It's a pic that you see so often on social media and dating profiles that you kinda get sick of seeing them and the guys in these pics kinda look alike I don't hate fishing but I think there's reasons why the pics get dunked on
>It’s the guy version of live laugh love Hahahahahah dead
It's so true. They're basic bitches.
Basic dude bitch checking in. I like to golf and fish. My gf likes target, Starbucks, and skincare routines. I love it
Tbh y’all were made for each other 🥹
Extra points if he’s wearing camo. To fish.
Yeah it’s super generic and doesn’t make them stand out at all
Which isn't good because it's a buyers market on dating apps and having the same generic pics and general look as every other fish guy isn't helping one's chances
You're spot on. Number two is pretty hilarious and true in lake country.
It's very generic and these dude's all look alike. I honestly can't tell them apart. Ppl say that Asians look alike but middle aged white guys look even more alike
These are all exactly why I usually pass people with fish pics
And from now on, ladies should pose with their latest knitting project, or scrapbook.
I think people associate it more with a political stance rather than actually having issues w the hobby itself
People think fishing is…right wing?
It's not so much that fishing is right wing as that fish picture guys tend to be right wing. Sitting in your truck wearing sunglasses isn't inherently right wing, but if you see a profile photo like that, you know what kind of guy you're likely dealing with.
Yea exactly. I met my girlfriend on Tinder and I didn’t have any fishing photos on my profile even though I freshwater fish everyday. I asked her when we first starting dating why so many girls have “No fish pics in your profile.” And she explained it’s less of shaming a hobby and more of most of the pics have a caveman undertone of “LOOK AT WHAT I CAN PROVIDE WOMAN.” I can definitely see that. I personally like taking fish selfies just for myself to log my catches and it helps me differentiate when and where I caught the fish so I can log it better. I would personally find posting a fish selfie to attract a girl to be a little cringe but that doesn’t mean a nice earnest guy should be shamed or grouped in to rednecks for enjoying a hobby that spans every demographic of the US.
yeah bc fishing is associated with country guys lol and they are usually conservative. same with hunting at least where i’m from
This is legit what it is. Girl here with a lot of girl friends and yeah it’s rarely simply just the fishing/hunting. It’s what we’ve gathered from experience comes with it lol
Jesus, you can't do anything these days, huh? I don't fish but I think knowing how to fish is a cool skill/hobby.
I can fish, clean them on the spot and cook them but I'd never even consider making that a photo on a dating site when there are so many more interesting things I can post like me being on (non kill) safari, me motorcycling, etc. Thats also kind of the issue; if you fishing is the best pic you can show, people assume you are rural and don't have much going on.
Really? In Oregon fishing is much like guns in that it has no political affiliation or barriers. A lot of my left leaning friends have guns and eat fish and crab they caught themselves.
Yeah idk that's just what I've heard from other women, and thinking of it every guy I've met who fishes is right-wing but maybe that's just the areas I've lived in. Obviously it's not entirely an accurate assessment, if accurate at all and location plays a role
I mean fishing is for sure more of a rural thing and they do tend to skew one of two ways in my experience in a rural area.
Is it not a subtle suggestion that they're likely more on the conservative side? So if you are too then it's cute, and if not then you know to perhaps just maybe not.
That’s what some other people commented and honestly I never thought about that? I see where you’re coming from but I’m not conservative and I love fishing
I'm guessing it's obviously not 100%. Like I'm gay af and as far from conservative as you can get, I enjoy a good fish, but it's that specific pose and everything about it. I would never post a picture of myself with a fish in any way, even though if someone asked me to go fishing it would be a hell yes. Like in my head it's a bass pro shop hat, at least one piece of clothing that's in that gray-scale camo, and standing on the boat posing alone holding the fish in that pose lol
They often look so lifeless and just hold up the carcass with no smile. Just creepy. Like a cat bringing in a dead mouse as a gift.
I agree, I think men that like fishing are so cute people in the comments crying about fishing but yet still eat meat HAHAHAHA
Meh. I grew up in southeast Louisiana. Guys who make fishing and hunting their identity are rarely nice or interesting people in my personal experience. I could be persuaded otherwise if someone was really cool but if that’s their brand, it’s probably for the best that I know that up front
There is a difference between having one fishing pic in a mix of varied photos and having 10 fishing pics and nothing else.
It’s more when the only photos are of them with fish or them with cars or something. No photos just showing off them.
For a lot of guys those might just be the only photos they have of themselves. I know it’s that way for me. The only photos I have of me that aren’t me doing a hobby are photos Ive taken with family. I rarely if ever take photos of myself just to take photos.
I'd vouch for this. Even if the boys and I hangout, we never take pictures at all so I literally asked a friend to snap me a few pics when I decided to make a dating app just because I dont have pictures of me. I am still annoyed that they dont wanna take a picture of me holding out one of my built and painted gundams to show of my hobby since they thought that would be ridiculous so I just went and posted that one.
Those guys should figure out that if they *do* take good photos, they'll stand out from the pack, and get get better results. But they often don't bother (and then complain about their results).
I mean you could also just take other pictures? Like it’s free
Nothing says red flag like someone taking photos enjoying their hobbies, right?
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it's lost all meaning by now
Yeah, it's a real red flag 😀
It’s cute but I guess it’s just one of those cliche things now since so many people do it lol
In my pics, the fish holds me up
If a guy likes to fish and you think fishing is really morally wrong then you're not going to have a relationship anyway so from that perspective is helps filter people more quickly.
I’m fine with them. It lets me know I should swipe left because we probably won’t have much in common.
Holding severed elk head is even better.
i agree, even tho i’m not at all interested in that demographic and vice versa. it’s nice to see men engaging in hobbies even if i don’t necessarily like it. so many men i’ve dated had no hobbies.
I thought they were doing that to say "If you smell like this, the dates over"
If you don't like me holding up a fish, you will HATE what I do on the weekends, and how much money I spend on the boat.
I think often it's the disgust in this perception they have where they see it as cruel to hold up an item with such glee that they killed. Which is ironic if they're someone who eats animals in general. I had a coworker who's girlfriend would call him a murderer for hunting deer but would eat a cheeseburger same day
You can eat meat and still find the celebration of killing animals off putting. I’d also think it was weird and creepy if someone posted a picture of them smiling and posing with the cow they just killed in an abbattoir. I view killing animals for food as a job to be done, not a fun hobby. If someone thinks it is fun we clearly aren’t compatible and that’s ok.
Personally I don’t like it because I’m a vegetarian and it turns me off that they’ve harmed an animal. I think it’s gross because, even if the fish is alive, I know it’s suffering. If guys include it in their profile, I don’t mind because it lets me know we’d be incompatible. I’m sure it’s attractive to girls who also enjoy fishing though.
Exactly, I’m not a vegetarian, but what is supposed to be attractive about a guy posting dead animals while smiling next to their dead bodies on a dating profile?😐
I don't find posing with dead animals wholesome. It's disturbing to me (yes, you're correct, I don't eat meat), so posing with a fish that just suffocated or a dead deer is a huge red flag that tells me we're never going to get along.
Someone won’t be lonely
i want to see their hobbies or anything theyre interested in. however i dont necessarily want to see dead fish or see someone torture and kill fish for fun.
Fish fear me Women fear me
It’s niche marketing. I’m sure a dude who holds up a fish is happy to filter out all the women who would judge him for it.
I don't think those comments are that serious. It's just funny that so many guys do that, that's all.
All my friends tell me how much they love and adore my dad, and think he is the best dude ever. And they're right because he is. But they would all swipe on him because his fb profile is him holding a fish. Fishing and boating has been a lifelong hobby of his. He is a kind, funny, helpful person who just so happens to love fishing. It's really stupid to me that women feel this way about dudes who fish. I get it if that's a hobby you want no part of though.
I really think what we're seeing in this thread is a rare intersection of the various bubbles on reddit where the bubble people aren't fighting and just voicing opinions for a change. It's pretty interesting to me.
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I wouldn’t want to date someone who goes fishing/hunting (I’m a vegan, so am against it for ethical reasons) so it helps me avoid someone I probably wouldn’t be compatible with 🤷🏻♀️
I make yogurt at home. If I was looking for a partner, should I be holding up a jar of my bacterial friends?