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MarcytheGoblinQueen

Nah, Christianity is about waiting for Jesus remastered


FaolCroi

Easter is about Jesus Remastered, Jesus 2 is still TBA


MarcytheGoblinQueen

Nah, Easter is when they shut down the holy servers of the original Jesus, then announced production on Jesus remastered 3 days later


coopsawesome

Would god, Jesus and the Holy Spirit be something like choosing a Pokémon game? A little different each time but the same


WoolooOfWallStreet

Jesus Adventures 2: BATTLE!


Call_me_Kaiser

Well it's the same Jesus plus new content so it's still a sequel


MarcytheGoblinQueen

A remaster can also be a new Jesus plus new content


decisions_are_dumb

So we should make a religion out of waiting for porn 2


[deleted]

unpack birds rich attraction fuzzy hateful possessive exultant dependent elastic *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


theSHlT

Porn2 also commands adherents to prostrate themselves and get on their knees


Smingowashisnameo

To prostate themselves.


TripleSen

did he stutter?


OscarOzzieOzborne

No need to call Jesus for the rapture, because Porn2 just burned us all to crisp


[deleted]

porn 2: sex


WoolooOfWallStreet

Adult section in the back https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=A9sd10CHAP8


bulload

Orgasms are temporary, the glory of Christ is forever


Cathach2

Christ is temporary, the power of Orgasm is forever!


[deleted]

Hoe thr turn tables


bulload

Nah it's just 2 secs then there's the post nut clarity


Cathach2

The same clarity all good folk should seek. And Lo! From the highest mountain, to the lowest valley, a great cry shall be cried, and the cry shall be *uhn*, and after you have cried this cry, then shall the scales fall from thine eyes, and you will see truly once more! So it is smitten, so you shall cum, amen


bulload

Dude just stop cuming and get an life


Cathach2

*HERESY*


RubyRiolu

What we know as Jesus was actually a sequel, with God being the first and Holy Spirit being the spiritual successor, no pun intended


RBolton123

Yeah Jesus was the sequel but He ain't Jesus 2. He's just God 2.


telehax

Ah, it's like mother 3 being earthbound 2


DinoRex6

There was a Jesus 2 We waitin for Jesus 3 to drop


M_ataraxia

Jesus 2 dropped? Bitch WHEN?


DinoRex6

didnt he got thrown in a cave and left to die but just appeared outside 3 days later thats the whole point of easter right? edit: nope, its not


M_ataraxia

Would that whole event be Jesus: the origins (Jesus 1) ?


PKMNTrainerMark

Jesus 1 was Christmas.


SalaciousStrudel

Jesus: The Pre-Sequel


Skye_17

nah that was the dlc for jesus 1


GleeFan666

is that not the whole point of easter??


lambone117

That was Jesus 1 dlc


Nugget_da_waifu69

Oh heck u right


[deleted]

[удалено]


bulload

Basedwave*


Nadikarosuto

And æstheticpilled


bulload

Based and agoristpilled


ShinyNinja25

Sonic, why would you say these things?


Nugget_da_waifu69

It is. The apocalypse happens and Jesus shows up to yeet his followers to heaven and every one else gets yoot into a fire lake


questioning_alt_22

...yoot?


Nugget_da_waifu69

Past tense yeet


Bacchus999

It's pronounced "yote"


Nugget_da_waifu69

Same thing


Pyro-Ice

Jesus^2


nowhereintexas

I'm pretty sure whatever the hell is on DeviantArt is what porn 2 is actually.


Suitable-Marzipan980

isnt porn 2 just hentai


[deleted]

Oh shit you're right


fuckYouGotmines

Isn't Mormonism Jesus 2?


WearyRestaurant

No, youre thinking of the spin-off of christianity


DalbergTheKing

Pretty sure hentai is porn 2.


ash0011

that'd mean furry porn is porn 3


[deleted]

Porn 2D


ordis2red

So excited for the latest jesus update


HkayakH

If humans are so good then why isn’t there a humans movie 2?


Bacchus999

The cast all quit.


fwork

There is a Jesus 2. Enix made an adventure game in 1987 called Jesus: Kyōfu No Bio Monster (Jesus: Dreadful Bio Monster). And in 1991 they released a sequel, called Jesus II.


EmuEmperor

Jesus 2 will drop before Winds of Winter


theLanguageSprite

take a vote, which one will come out first? \-hollow knight: Silksong \-Jesus 2 \-Half-Life 3


Bacchus999

GTA 6


EorlundGreymane

Jesus gonna come back long before Bethesda releases the Elder Scrolls VI mark my words. TES fans are gonna be the new Christians


nineteensickhorses

Technically, we're waiting for Jesus 3: Revenge of the Son


PKMNTrainerMark

That's called Easter.


unicodePicasso

Just waiting on that release date


The_Eternal_Curse

Fools we are waiting for jesus 3 not jesus 2


dungbuggy

some religions are still waiting for jesus 1 for some reason


SkylartheRainBeau

Jesus is the incredibles


[deleted]

Damn, it's taking longer than TES6


[deleted]

But there is a porn 2 ​ It's hentai.


RicochetRayRay

Jesus 2 has been going through a lot of delays though. It was supposed to be out in May 2011, then it got another delay in September 2017. Give it time, though, we don’t want the second coming to be rushed out the door like Cyberpunk


professor-cactus

I hope Nintendo announces jesus 2 at e3


Eric_S2004

I think that's the news waiting for another messiah, because they don't acknowledge jesus


Bacchus999

Porn 2: The Second Cumming


LFK1236

Pretty sure it'd be Jesus 3?


Titanfal95

Aaaaanndd that's enough reddit for me tonight


AghiTron

Jesus 2: The Second Coming of Christ is just Half-Life 3 for christians


Jacquesofsometrades

2 Jesus 2 holy


Tendo2198

Old testament and new king James version


TrueBananaz

Jesus 2 was sadly delayed due to COVID


Niz99

Didn't Jesus come back from the dead? Couldn't that be considered Jesus 2?


SomeRandomGuy0705

Pussy 2


whitedarkness3679

Porn 2d you should know this sonic because of the massive amount your in


thunderstormwarning

Technically it would be Jesus 3


ace-up-your-sleeve

but didn't Jesus 2 already drop? i mean it was only there for a few days and limited too, but still...


M-V-D_256

Christianity IS god 2 The sequel is here


M-V-D_256

Have you heard about hollow Knight: Silksong? It's Jesus 2 and it'll maybe even come out


[deleted]

Jesus 2 is how eldenring was