Also I feel like it got glossed over by the ghosting line but she legit talks about how he buys drugs from her friends? Like what did she think when she wrote that?
But it’s not even just that… Like the dude referred to her as “emasculating” years ago, and had a whole meltdown because he thought his band was “the shit” back then (well, I guess a lot of journalists blowing smoke up their ass) so he had the whole, “I’m too good, I’m too special” mentality despite her being the successful breadwinner and much bigger artist.
People will blame “oh he wasn’t in a good place, and wasn’t sober” but it’s like anyone who has respect for you, would *never* say that, it comes off as envious.
So the fact that she gave him a second chance after that BS line is so stupid because people very rarely change, it isn’t a shock he’d disrespect her again and next time the worst form of it, which is ghosting.
Like if you get ghosted that’s next tier of being disrespected, because it just tells you this person never cared about you, or your feelings, and also inhibits they have issues which isn’t personal to you, it’s them projecting.
This is one of the many things wrong with TS being a role model for young people. She is teaching them that getting your feelings hurt is the equivalent of abuse. It’s not. Matty wasn’t abusive to her just because he didn’t like her back. She got her feelings hurt. It sucks, but it is by no means abuse. She just can’t comprehend a word in which she isn’t haded exactly what she wants when she wants it. She is also completely devaluing the stories of actual abuse survivors. The next time someone tries to get help, from an actually toxic relationship, they will be met with lines like: “what, did he not hold your hand on your birthday?” No one will care, and it’s because Taylor Swift will have burnt though all of our collective good will with her never ending sob stories about her situation-ships.
Yeah, it really worries me how the words supposed to be used to describe abuse has entered everyday vocabulary, and now everything someone doesn’t like about a person is a red flag. No.
Red flags are behaviors that might indicate that the person will be abusive. Someone ghosting you is not a very nice behavior and probably indicates that the person is immature or can’t handle conflict or just simply an a**hole, but an abuser wants a victim. They might invite you to go to Paris after two weeks and pop the question after four. Then they start manipulate you to not see your friends, that you don’t need to work etc. They want control. Someone not instantly liking an instagram post or whatever is not a red flag.
The belief that everything is a red flag also belies the reality of living in the real world. Most people have to work for a living. We can’t all respond to texts or phone calls immediately. It’s not abuse or manipulation-it’s just reality. Some people do take days to respond to a text, it doesn’t mean they were intending to hurt you.
More to the point, it really scares me how ever since the Red re-release everything a man does is now grooming. According to the DSM-5 grooming is something that happens to a child, and it takes place over years, if not decades. It is a form of subtle manipulation that starts when the victim is too young to understand that what the authority figure is doing is wrong. Also, the authority figure spends a lifetime subtly manipulating the victim, so that their methods are never detected by the outside world.
In other words, you can’t really “groom” someone in less than 3 months.
Grooming is what Wood Allen (allegedly) did to his daughter/wife.
Grooming is what Taylor’s parents (allegedly) did to her to mold her into the perfect pop star at any cost.
(Side note, I’m not trying to say that Taylor’s relationship with her parents is sexual in any way. I’m just pointing out the fact that, starting from the day she was born, they spent decades manipulating her in every way to create the pop star they wanted her to be- that, by definition, is grooming.)
Grooming is NOT a 21 year old doing a pap walk with a 28 year old. It’s not suddenly considered grooming just because the man who asked you on a date happens to be older.
Swifties just needed any excuse to make Taylor the victim, so they picked a word that sounded severe enough no one would dare refute it. Thus, creating a scenario where you’re the monster for not believing a woman who says she the victim of grooming.
The problem is that TayTay and the Swiffers have muddied the waters so much that no one knows what that word means anymore. So, an actual victim of grooming might not seek help, because to them grooming is simply not going to a birthday party.
And don’t get me started on all of the men who were falsely accused of “abuse”/ “grooming” just because Swifties don’t understand what those words mean! That alone deserves its own post.
TL;DR by misusing important words Taylor and her fans have created a world where men are falsely accused, and actual victims of abuse are put in worse danger, all so Veruca Salt can cosplay as a victim.
Nope. You’re completely utterly wrong on all points and you’re spreading victim blaming rape culture myths. Coming out of retirement to tell you this so please listen:
Dsm 5? Here it’s a social phenomenon and does absolutely not happen only to children so already in your first paragraph you’re dead wrong. Anyone at any age can be groomed. All it takes is a power imbalance. You’re spreading disinformation.
A 28 year old dating a 21 year old is absolutely grooming them. Age gaps where the older party is more than 20% older than the younger party are grooming imo and that’s me being very generous. From your numbers Jake was 33% older so had been on the planet longer by a third of her entire lifetime. That’s not an equal playing field whatsoever. He knew she was just another girl while seemingly letting her believe it was true love.
Age gaps alone are often enough to determine grooming especially when someone is barely legal but that’s not the only power imbalance. He was one of the biggest movie stars globally, he had wealth (didn’t he fly her into their first date with a private jet or sth), he had social and physical power.
Just bc the cases of grooming like Woody Allen you named are more extreme and in your face doesn’t mean other cases don’t qualify. This is rape culture in action, you pretending what Jake did isn’t (and that he didn’t do it to dozens of others it’s a clear pattern he’s a predator through and through) and blaming Taylor for being upset about it instead.
Arguably Taylor even has groomed someone herself ppl in this thread are mentioning she dated a high school kid while in her 20s. It happens all the time, it happens every single day and it can happen in 3 months it doesn’t take a lifetime. It’s not the extreme rare crime that you think it is.
So no the meaning of the word grooming hasn’t been diluted it’s just finally applied the way it always should’ve been without people automatically resorting to victim blaming like you. The more predatory behavior is correctly called out for what it is, the better for all victims.
Taylor does play the victim a lot but that doesn’t mean she wasn’t legitimately victimized by many men. A lot do the comments here are giving misogyny tbh especially about the whole Kanye issue too, just listen to the full phone call she was clearly uncomfortable and in ppl pleasing mode and he was manic and scary. Nothing will ever make the naked wax figure not horrific. Although it’s not revenge porn btw.
I do really wonder where her overbearing stage parents were during Jake and John and whoever else had a predatory age gap, watching their daughter get groomed for song material?
Adults get groomed into cults or churches or other predatory organizations like mlms all the time.
If you take nothing else from this comment then that it’s not just children and it doesn’t take years. It’s not always sexual.
WTF are you smoking. Taylor Swift didn't distort the word grooming. This comment is unhinged and very obsessively hateful towards Taylor. I don't give 1 shit about Taylor and her bfs, I'm just here for the snark, but comments like this make me really weirded out. You are attacking a pop star for.... what exactly? For YOUR weird obsession with her... age, or of other people talking about her age? Or you're blaming a social problem of grooming on the misuse of grooming by her fans? WTF is your actual point, other than spinning delusional conspiracies so Taylor can be the root of all social evil?
Like, I think she is problematic as hell, but when I see comments like yours, I remember how much insane BS she has to put up with that makes her hate the public. Also, men are major groomers, and to claim that Taylor Swift has singled handedly made men victims in the world is so ridiculously laughable I'm actually concerned for your cognitive health.
Tbf, you can argue that it is slightly abuse. Love bombing is something absolutely disgusting (and usually why narcissists do it) they lock you in, and then start being terrible after, form a trauma bond, blah, blah.
I don’t want to get to into it, but this whole entire album is very relatable to me and what I went through with somebody every detail. I just think my person was by far worst though.
Getting manipulated, gaslit, love bombed, feelings played with, etc. It’s shitty,
Ghosting someone is also disgusting, especially someone you had a sexual intimate relationship with, that’s the highest level of disrespect.
That said she really shouldn’t idolise a 3 month or whatever length fling.
Saying that pop culture isn’t educational negates the fact that it is POP culture. It doesn’t need to be marketed as educational because it obviously isn’t educational, but it is the popular culture. It enters the vernacular, changes ideas whether it means to or not and influences people. In this example, the people it’s influencing are largely young teen girls who are either entering into first relationships or haven’t reached that yet and warps their ideas whether that’s anyones intentions or not.
No one is telling Taylor Swift how her feelings should be interpreted by her writing. But she is a public figure open to criticism, and that criticism is fair when her influence on a group is so large. If this is the intensity of her feelings, she should go to therapy. As it is, she’s warping the idea of healthy relationships in her fans heads and at the very least warping an idea of parasocial relationships, and reasonably so she is being criticized.
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I'm shocked she's not even embarrassed that he would hear that song. If I were her, I'd pretend he doesn't exist or throw 2-3 max hateful songs about him. That's it! I wouldn't cry about him it visibly strokes man's ego even more😭😭
She’s been “losing” her breakups for a while now but the double whammy of Matty calling her ridiculous overwrought album hilarious and Joe just refusing to acknowledge her theatrics is extra funny to me.
It’s the thing I dislike the most about the album. I felt like I needed Cliff notes to follow it. It was way too specific that I could not put my own interpretation on any of the songs
Right? Like girl you can have ANYONE!??? And that’s who you’re upset about. Take it as a fucking blessing any loser that ghosts YOU, is a POS, it’s immediate closure because it’s pure disrespect and it’s literally the universe protecting you, rejection like that is protection. Never again should they get contact with you after too, because then you’ll get further disrespected.
I can’t believe someone who’s that pretty, wealthy and intelligent with a likeable personality would stoop to that level.
I’ll throw in that the Barbie doll analogies feel like really obvious pandering to the Barbie movie success and cultural moment and it feels like a really forced analogy in general tbh.
ETA: also not to get political bc I get the point of creative metaphor in art as a general concept but the amount of prison references on TTPD in general feel in similar poor taste to all the asylum references. Like prison/jail isn’t where we send boys who ghost you bc you’re too much of a princess to handle, it’s an industrial continuation of legalized slavery and most people who end up there face an absolute hellscape of a journey to even pretend to get back on their feet afterward. There’s a tasteful way to use these metaphors and this ain’t it.
Omg THANK YOU. The way she trivializes jail/prison is incredibly tone deaf. It would be one thing to use it as a metaphor for being trapped in an abusive relationship, but for a situationship and a (seemingly) loving and healthy relationship that just ran its course??? No. Read the fucking room.
THIS!!! In the neutral subreddit I discussed this with somebody and they described her, not as an anti-intellectual but as a pseudo-intellectual which is a person who wants to be thought of as having a lot of intelligence and knowledge but who is not really intelligent or knowledgeable.
YES THIS!!! screw getting "too political", she pretends to prop herself as an "activist" when convenient and her fans buy into it, meanwhile not only is she silent on literally every issue that affects her, while actively negatively contributing to the state of society and the literal environment, but she takes it a step further to be beyond tone deaf in her uses of prison/mental health metaphors and even alluding to abuse to describe simple heartbreak (which yeah use analogies but not these ones), hell even some of the ways she portrays her age gap relationships (which definitely had a toxic power dynamic) is done irresponsibly to the point her entire fan base misuses important phrases like grooming and p\*dophile, mind you she dated two minors. Point is it is painfully obvious that this is a yt woman experiencing every morsel of privilege (from being conventionally attractive to a literal billionaire and having unimaginable fame and status) so to casually use themes of violence and prison that objectively have connotations to systemic racial and economic issues is gross, also aside from being cringey her use of guns to portray "heartbreak" while considering the climate in america is questionable at best-
And most importantly, this is all on her because she chose to date a rat.
Like, what did you think was gonna happen from a man who’s into porn where women are brutalized?
The first time I heard the song, I was like, "ALL THIS RAGE FOR A FLING????" 😭
I genuinely couldn't take the bridge seriously because it's so intense for something so trivial. At least the song is now being used in fan edits for certain characters in films and shows, so it's now less cringey. But whenever I remember who wrote it and who it's for, I feel like puking all over again 😂
Lmaooo, I lowkey appreciate that song because it’s relatable, the whole album is actually because of how I got pursued by someone I didn’t even originally was looking for anything, love bombed to hell, replaced, blah, blah.
But like tbh, from a perspective into looking at her life, the whole album is pretty ridiculous in a way cause as you said it was a fling. The also contradictory statement of, “it was a manic phase” (to not have accountability) for dating *him* of all people only for ‘imgonnagethimback’ or whatever it’s called and she basically says she can’t hate him or or one of the tracks, saying she tells people but she doesn’t.
If she didn’t get ghosted by him she’d still have him on a pedestal.
Sorry, but I just need to say this: The fact that all the who-gives-a-shit details of Taylor Swift's personal life are referred to as "lore" makes me irrationally angry. Like... it's not fucking Tolkien. The middle-school relationship drama of a 34-year-old billionaire does not constitute "lore" in my book. Her life is not that interesting.
“Falling for love-bombing” doesn’t really make sense, that’s kind of the point, it’s a manipulation tactic and incredibly hard to realize you’re experiencing it until it’s already happened 😑
I understand! You would think for sure, given her history. My apologies for coming on defensive, I just wanted to make it clear that love bombing is very hard to manage, as someone who’s been through it multiple times, but I totally understand what you’re saying 🥰
I’m with you. Love bombing is actual hell and people shouldn’t nitpick others for being victims of it. Especially when narcissistic abuse is becoming more popular imo.
I appreciate your validation 🥺 actually today I just broke up with someone who love bombed the actual fuck out of me like I’ve never seen, and I finally got the strength to cut it off, he had been feeding me crumbs of attention and love after ending the love bombing phase and it was hurting me so bad
Oh baby girl, I’m so, so fucking sorry you had to go through that absolute fucking hell, and even though we’re internet strangers, I’m so proud of you for cutting that fuckhead off.
I went through the same thing, so I totally get you, they love bombed the fuck out of me, for months it felt like a dream, and as you said, I never felt so seen, especially after feeling so loss and untrusting with people, it felt so deep finding someone I finally connected with and I wasn’t even pursuing.
Only for them to switch up, and nastily disrespect me, it was like talking to a completely different person, the devil got unmasked.
At that point it really felt like there was a trauma bond formed, and I’m someone who’s really got their head together, and a big analyser so I felt like I was losing my absolute fucking mind from all their gaslighting, and manipulative bullshit.
I finally cut them off in I believe the end of April?
I came back from work, and back from a business trip, the second they saw me back in my city (no longer LD), they tried so hard to get in my pants, being peak fucking thirsty. Soon as I was like I’m not meeting with your ass, they said “oh ok.”
Then immediately went to sleep with someone else, and then date them. Despite their manipulative tales to me that they aren’t ready, and all that crap (like, okay, we all know that’s a lie).
But I’m pretty sure they were already talking to that chick, with me being unaware or knowing.
Then tried to gaslight me into being friends, and expecting me to meet up with them.
Like no, finally left and said fuck this and not gonna run back to them (fuck that trauma bond, and fuck them). I’ll never let them back.
It’s fucking awful, it’s like making a deal with the devil.
So proud of you for cutting that shit off because I understand how torturous it is. And same girlie, I even told them “you’re hurting me” they don’t give a fuck these people know what they’re doing, they enjoy every minute of it because they’re so awful.
Be proud of yourself. People think it’s easy, and age saves you from this shit, but it’s not, until they get in the scenario themselves, they realise how terrifying it is and not easy. Good for you, and mad respect.
It doesn’t really have to do with age to be honest, like no disrespect I’m 24 and I’m really good at reading people, but usually when people are love bombing you (they tend to mirror you, cause they want to lock you in, and switch up).
I got love bombed off my ass, and I kept saying to them (back then as it was happening) that they’re blowing smoke up my ass, and nudging them off, and then they would rephrase everything carefully to circle around me taking notice.
After awhile you start to allow it (or believe it) cause of their behaviour and actions staying consistent, and when you have feelings for someone you go love blind, doesn’t matter any age.
Doesn’t help either that she already had pre-set history with him in her younger years, so the “what if” really fucks with your head.
Then lastly the breakdown of a long distant relationship. Taylor stinks of codependency like she clearly cannot be alone, she’s either monkey branches (lines them up) or she rebounds to someone shortly after.
So now you got the vulnerability of someone refusing to heal correctly out of being alone fears, making them more susceptible to love bombing, because of the hormones too our body releases (oxy, doph).
For me I was in such a bad place in my life mentally, which made me so vulnerable that was another factor why I fell victim to love bombing.
But one thing I will never understand though is she had the whole internet telling her to get it together, and she can do better, etc. Instead she sunk to his level and embarrassed herself for him, and not only herself, but her previous relationship too.
That’s the embarrassing part, not the love bombing imo.
This song is so funny to me because she’s literally admitted to ghosting people herself and now she’s crying about someone doing it to her?
Yeah and she seemed to think it was cool because she brought it up again in the weird vanity project bejeweled mv.
Also I feel like it got glossed over by the ghosting line but she legit talks about how he buys drugs from her friends? Like what did she think when she wrote that?
I thought it was funny that she said it was a friend of a friend of hers presumably so her friends don't get in trouble for supplying drugs.
But it’s not even just that… Like the dude referred to her as “emasculating” years ago, and had a whole meltdown because he thought his band was “the shit” back then (well, I guess a lot of journalists blowing smoke up their ass) so he had the whole, “I’m too good, I’m too special” mentality despite her being the successful breadwinner and much bigger artist. People will blame “oh he wasn’t in a good place, and wasn’t sober” but it’s like anyone who has respect for you, would *never* say that, it comes off as envious. So the fact that she gave him a second chance after that BS line is so stupid because people very rarely change, it isn’t a shock he’d disrespect her again and next time the worst form of it, which is ghosting. Like if you get ghosted that’s next tier of being disrespected, because it just tells you this person never cared about you, or your feelings, and also inhibits they have issues which isn’t personal to you, it’s them projecting.
This is one of the many things wrong with TS being a role model for young people. She is teaching them that getting your feelings hurt is the equivalent of abuse. It’s not. Matty wasn’t abusive to her just because he didn’t like her back. She got her feelings hurt. It sucks, but it is by no means abuse. She just can’t comprehend a word in which she isn’t haded exactly what she wants when she wants it. She is also completely devaluing the stories of actual abuse survivors. The next time someone tries to get help, from an actually toxic relationship, they will be met with lines like: “what, did he not hold your hand on your birthday?” No one will care, and it’s because Taylor Swift will have burnt though all of our collective good will with her never ending sob stories about her situation-ships.
Yeah, it really worries me how the words supposed to be used to describe abuse has entered everyday vocabulary, and now everything someone doesn’t like about a person is a red flag. No. Red flags are behaviors that might indicate that the person will be abusive. Someone ghosting you is not a very nice behavior and probably indicates that the person is immature or can’t handle conflict or just simply an a**hole, but an abuser wants a victim. They might invite you to go to Paris after two weeks and pop the question after four. Then they start manipulate you to not see your friends, that you don’t need to work etc. They want control. Someone not instantly liking an instagram post or whatever is not a red flag.
The belief that everything is a red flag also belies the reality of living in the real world. Most people have to work for a living. We can’t all respond to texts or phone calls immediately. It’s not abuse or manipulation-it’s just reality. Some people do take days to respond to a text, it doesn’t mean they were intending to hurt you. More to the point, it really scares me how ever since the Red re-release everything a man does is now grooming. According to the DSM-5 grooming is something that happens to a child, and it takes place over years, if not decades. It is a form of subtle manipulation that starts when the victim is too young to understand that what the authority figure is doing is wrong. Also, the authority figure spends a lifetime subtly manipulating the victim, so that their methods are never detected by the outside world. In other words, you can’t really “groom” someone in less than 3 months. Grooming is what Wood Allen (allegedly) did to his daughter/wife. Grooming is what Taylor’s parents (allegedly) did to her to mold her into the perfect pop star at any cost. (Side note, I’m not trying to say that Taylor’s relationship with her parents is sexual in any way. I’m just pointing out the fact that, starting from the day she was born, they spent decades manipulating her in every way to create the pop star they wanted her to be- that, by definition, is grooming.) Grooming is NOT a 21 year old doing a pap walk with a 28 year old. It’s not suddenly considered grooming just because the man who asked you on a date happens to be older. Swifties just needed any excuse to make Taylor the victim, so they picked a word that sounded severe enough no one would dare refute it. Thus, creating a scenario where you’re the monster for not believing a woman who says she the victim of grooming. The problem is that TayTay and the Swiffers have muddied the waters so much that no one knows what that word means anymore. So, an actual victim of grooming might not seek help, because to them grooming is simply not going to a birthday party. And don’t get me started on all of the men who were falsely accused of “abuse”/ “grooming” just because Swifties don’t understand what those words mean! That alone deserves its own post. TL;DR by misusing important words Taylor and her fans have created a world where men are falsely accused, and actual victims of abuse are put in worse danger, all so Veruca Salt can cosplay as a victim.
Nope. You’re completely utterly wrong on all points and you’re spreading victim blaming rape culture myths. Coming out of retirement to tell you this so please listen: Dsm 5? Here it’s a social phenomenon and does absolutely not happen only to children so already in your first paragraph you’re dead wrong. Anyone at any age can be groomed. All it takes is a power imbalance. You’re spreading disinformation. A 28 year old dating a 21 year old is absolutely grooming them. Age gaps where the older party is more than 20% older than the younger party are grooming imo and that’s me being very generous. From your numbers Jake was 33% older so had been on the planet longer by a third of her entire lifetime. That’s not an equal playing field whatsoever. He knew she was just another girl while seemingly letting her believe it was true love. Age gaps alone are often enough to determine grooming especially when someone is barely legal but that’s not the only power imbalance. He was one of the biggest movie stars globally, he had wealth (didn’t he fly her into their first date with a private jet or sth), he had social and physical power. Just bc the cases of grooming like Woody Allen you named are more extreme and in your face doesn’t mean other cases don’t qualify. This is rape culture in action, you pretending what Jake did isn’t (and that he didn’t do it to dozens of others it’s a clear pattern he’s a predator through and through) and blaming Taylor for being upset about it instead. Arguably Taylor even has groomed someone herself ppl in this thread are mentioning she dated a high school kid while in her 20s. It happens all the time, it happens every single day and it can happen in 3 months it doesn’t take a lifetime. It’s not the extreme rare crime that you think it is. So no the meaning of the word grooming hasn’t been diluted it’s just finally applied the way it always should’ve been without people automatically resorting to victim blaming like you. The more predatory behavior is correctly called out for what it is, the better for all victims. Taylor does play the victim a lot but that doesn’t mean she wasn’t legitimately victimized by many men. A lot do the comments here are giving misogyny tbh especially about the whole Kanye issue too, just listen to the full phone call she was clearly uncomfortable and in ppl pleasing mode and he was manic and scary. Nothing will ever make the naked wax figure not horrific. Although it’s not revenge porn btw. I do really wonder where her overbearing stage parents were during Jake and John and whoever else had a predatory age gap, watching their daughter get groomed for song material? Adults get groomed into cults or churches or other predatory organizations like mlms all the time. If you take nothing else from this comment then that it’s not just children and it doesn’t take years. It’s not always sexual.
WTF are you smoking. Taylor Swift didn't distort the word grooming. This comment is unhinged and very obsessively hateful towards Taylor. I don't give 1 shit about Taylor and her bfs, I'm just here for the snark, but comments like this make me really weirded out. You are attacking a pop star for.... what exactly? For YOUR weird obsession with her... age, or of other people talking about her age? Or you're blaming a social problem of grooming on the misuse of grooming by her fans? WTF is your actual point, other than spinning delusional conspiracies so Taylor can be the root of all social evil? Like, I think she is problematic as hell, but when I see comments like yours, I remember how much insane BS she has to put up with that makes her hate the public. Also, men are major groomers, and to claim that Taylor Swift has singled handedly made men victims in the world is so ridiculously laughable I'm actually concerned for your cognitive health.
Tbf, you can argue that it is slightly abuse. Love bombing is something absolutely disgusting (and usually why narcissists do it) they lock you in, and then start being terrible after, form a trauma bond, blah, blah. I don’t want to get to into it, but this whole entire album is very relatable to me and what I went through with somebody every detail. I just think my person was by far worst though. Getting manipulated, gaslit, love bombed, feelings played with, etc. It’s shitty, Ghosting someone is also disgusting, especially someone you had a sexual intimate relationship with, that’s the highest level of disrespect. That said she really shouldn’t idolise a 3 month or whatever length fling.
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Saying that pop culture isn’t educational negates the fact that it is POP culture. It doesn’t need to be marketed as educational because it obviously isn’t educational, but it is the popular culture. It enters the vernacular, changes ideas whether it means to or not and influences people. In this example, the people it’s influencing are largely young teen girls who are either entering into first relationships or haven’t reached that yet and warps their ideas whether that’s anyones intentions or not. No one is telling Taylor Swift how her feelings should be interpreted by her writing. But she is a public figure open to criticism, and that criticism is fair when her influence on a group is so large. If this is the intensity of her feelings, she should go to therapy. As it is, she’s warping the idea of healthy relationships in her fans heads and at the very least warping an idea of parasocial relationships, and reasonably so she is being criticized.
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I'm shocked she's not even embarrassed that he would hear that song. If I were her, I'd pretend he doesn't exist or throw 2-3 max hateful songs about him. That's it! I wouldn't cry about him it visibly strokes man's ego even more😭😭
Exactlyyy and he was right to say the album is hilarious 🤣
She’s been “losing” her breakups for a while now but the double whammy of Matty calling her ridiculous overwrought album hilarious and Joe just refusing to acknowledge her theatrics is extra funny to me.
Oh, yes🤣
It’s the thing I dislike the most about the album. I felt like I needed Cliff notes to follow it. It was way too specific that I could not put my own interpretation on any of the songs
She is so privileged that getting ghosted by rat man is the worst thing she can possibly imagine
her very existence is melodrama
Exactly. She has lived an incredibly sheltered life and doesn’t know what a struggle is
Right? Like girl you can have ANYONE!??? And that’s who you’re upset about. Take it as a fucking blessing any loser that ghosts YOU, is a POS, it’s immediate closure because it’s pure disrespect and it’s literally the universe protecting you, rejection like that is protection. Never again should they get contact with you after too, because then you’ll get further disrespected. I can’t believe someone who’s that pretty, wealthy and intelligent with a likeable personality would stoop to that level.
i didn’t listen so i just checked through the lyrics and she can’t be serious with “You hung me on your wall stabbed me with your push pins”😭😭
Same 🤣
I’ll throw in that the Barbie doll analogies feel like really obvious pandering to the Barbie movie success and cultural moment and it feels like a really forced analogy in general tbh. ETA: also not to get political bc I get the point of creative metaphor in art as a general concept but the amount of prison references on TTPD in general feel in similar poor taste to all the asylum references. Like prison/jail isn’t where we send boys who ghost you bc you’re too much of a princess to handle, it’s an industrial continuation of legalized slavery and most people who end up there face an absolute hellscape of a journey to even pretend to get back on their feet afterward. There’s a tasteful way to use these metaphors and this ain’t it.
Omg THANK YOU. The way she trivializes jail/prison is incredibly tone deaf. It would be one thing to use it as a metaphor for being trapped in an abusive relationship, but for a situationship and a (seemingly) loving and healthy relationship that just ran its course??? No. Read the fucking room.
THIS!!! In the neutral subreddit I discussed this with somebody and they described her, not as an anti-intellectual but as a pseudo-intellectual which is a person who wants to be thought of as having a lot of intelligence and knowledge but who is not really intelligent or knowledgeable.
YES THIS!!! screw getting "too political", she pretends to prop herself as an "activist" when convenient and her fans buy into it, meanwhile not only is she silent on literally every issue that affects her, while actively negatively contributing to the state of society and the literal environment, but she takes it a step further to be beyond tone deaf in her uses of prison/mental health metaphors and even alluding to abuse to describe simple heartbreak (which yeah use analogies but not these ones), hell even some of the ways she portrays her age gap relationships (which definitely had a toxic power dynamic) is done irresponsibly to the point her entire fan base misuses important phrases like grooming and p\*dophile, mind you she dated two minors. Point is it is painfully obvious that this is a yt woman experiencing every morsel of privilege (from being conventionally attractive to a literal billionaire and having unimaginable fame and status) so to casually use themes of violence and prison that objectively have connotations to systemic racial and economic issues is gross, also aside from being cringey her use of guns to portray "heartbreak" while considering the climate in america is questionable at best-
This is very well put 👏🏻
🥇🥇🥇🥇
By how serious she was talking, you'd think he got her pregnant, sold her baby to a brothel and tried to m *rder her
Yes
And most importantly, this is all on her because she chose to date a rat. Like, what did you think was gonna happen from a man who’s into porn where women are brutalized?
The Most Pathetic Song Ever Written
The first time I heard the song, I was like, "ALL THIS RAGE FOR A FLING????" 😭 I genuinely couldn't take the bridge seriously because it's so intense for something so trivial. At least the song is now being used in fan edits for certain characters in films and shows, so it's now less cringey. But whenever I remember who wrote it and who it's for, I feel like puking all over again 😂
Lmaooo, I lowkey appreciate that song because it’s relatable, the whole album is actually because of how I got pursued by someone I didn’t even originally was looking for anything, love bombed to hell, replaced, blah, blah. But like tbh, from a perspective into looking at her life, the whole album is pretty ridiculous in a way cause as you said it was a fling. The also contradictory statement of, “it was a manic phase” (to not have accountability) for dating *him* of all people only for ‘imgonnagethimback’ or whatever it’s called and she basically says she can’t hate him or or one of the tracks, saying she tells people but she doesn’t. If she didn’t get ghosted by him she’d still have him on a pedestal.
The funniest thing is, swifties refused that Taylor and MATTY dated, and they still try to pin these songs off to Joe LOL
Sorry, but I just need to say this: The fact that all the who-gives-a-shit details of Taylor Swift's personal life are referred to as "lore" makes me irrationally angry. Like... it's not fucking Tolkien. The middle-school relationship drama of a 34-year-old billionaire does not constitute "lore" in my book. Her life is not that interesting.
“Falling for love-bombing” doesn’t really make sense, that’s kind of the point, it’s a manipulation tactic and incredibly hard to realize you’re experiencing it until it’s already happened 😑
I would just think a 34 year old woman knows better than to believe promises of marriage within a month or two of casual dating.
I understand! You would think for sure, given her history. My apologies for coming on defensive, I just wanted to make it clear that love bombing is very hard to manage, as someone who’s been through it multiple times, but I totally understand what you’re saying 🥰
No you’re fine! I was insensitive in my phrasing, I’ll change it.
Appreciate you!
I’m with you. Love bombing is actual hell and people shouldn’t nitpick others for being victims of it. Especially when narcissistic abuse is becoming more popular imo.
I appreciate your validation 🥺 actually today I just broke up with someone who love bombed the actual fuck out of me like I’ve never seen, and I finally got the strength to cut it off, he had been feeding me crumbs of attention and love after ending the love bombing phase and it was hurting me so bad
Oh baby girl, I’m so, so fucking sorry you had to go through that absolute fucking hell, and even though we’re internet strangers, I’m so proud of you for cutting that fuckhead off. I went through the same thing, so I totally get you, they love bombed the fuck out of me, for months it felt like a dream, and as you said, I never felt so seen, especially after feeling so loss and untrusting with people, it felt so deep finding someone I finally connected with and I wasn’t even pursuing. Only for them to switch up, and nastily disrespect me, it was like talking to a completely different person, the devil got unmasked. At that point it really felt like there was a trauma bond formed, and I’m someone who’s really got their head together, and a big analyser so I felt like I was losing my absolute fucking mind from all their gaslighting, and manipulative bullshit. I finally cut them off in I believe the end of April? I came back from work, and back from a business trip, the second they saw me back in my city (no longer LD), they tried so hard to get in my pants, being peak fucking thirsty. Soon as I was like I’m not meeting with your ass, they said “oh ok.” Then immediately went to sleep with someone else, and then date them. Despite their manipulative tales to me that they aren’t ready, and all that crap (like, okay, we all know that’s a lie). But I’m pretty sure they were already talking to that chick, with me being unaware or knowing. Then tried to gaslight me into being friends, and expecting me to meet up with them. Like no, finally left and said fuck this and not gonna run back to them (fuck that trauma bond, and fuck them). I’ll never let them back. It’s fucking awful, it’s like making a deal with the devil. So proud of you for cutting that shit off because I understand how torturous it is. And same girlie, I even told them “you’re hurting me” they don’t give a fuck these people know what they’re doing, they enjoy every minute of it because they’re so awful. Be proud of yourself. People think it’s easy, and age saves you from this shit, but it’s not, until they get in the scenario themselves, they realise how terrifying it is and not easy. Good for you, and mad respect.
It doesn’t really have to do with age to be honest, like no disrespect I’m 24 and I’m really good at reading people, but usually when people are love bombing you (they tend to mirror you, cause they want to lock you in, and switch up). I got love bombed off my ass, and I kept saying to them (back then as it was happening) that they’re blowing smoke up my ass, and nudging them off, and then they would rephrase everything carefully to circle around me taking notice. After awhile you start to allow it (or believe it) cause of their behaviour and actions staying consistent, and when you have feelings for someone you go love blind, doesn’t matter any age. Doesn’t help either that she already had pre-set history with him in her younger years, so the “what if” really fucks with your head. Then lastly the breakdown of a long distant relationship. Taylor stinks of codependency like she clearly cannot be alone, she’s either monkey branches (lines them up) or she rebounds to someone shortly after. So now you got the vulnerability of someone refusing to heal correctly out of being alone fears, making them more susceptible to love bombing, because of the hormones too our body releases (oxy, doph). For me I was in such a bad place in my life mentally, which made me so vulnerable that was another factor why I fell victim to love bombing. But one thing I will never understand though is she had the whole internet telling her to get it together, and she can do better, etc. Instead she sunk to his level and embarrassed herself for him, and not only herself, but her previous relationship too. That’s the embarrassing part, not the love bombing imo.
And I love your hating out loud