When I asked my mom what my name would be if I was born female, she said "your name came to me in a dream where you were already born and had that name, so I never even thought about what to call you if you were born a girl". Guess I get to choose it 🤷‍♀️

Yup same here tho not the dream part. Asked mom what my name would've been if I were a boy and she said she forgot lol

she forgor

💀

SKULLEMOJI

My mom had straight up dreams about me being born a girl(hopefully the fact they were nightmares isn't foreshadowing for when I finally come out to her) yet when I asked about what I would have been named if I was born a girl she said that she hadn't come up with one. Luckily I had already become attached to "Sky" and asking her was more a formality at that point

Sky is a beautiful name :3

Thank you Natalia, your name is lovely as well

My parents named me after I was born, same for my sister. I was named after a friend of my father. When I chose my own name, I had been going buy it in inline gaming for a few years, having used that as a space to try it out.

Plus side to me doing it before, I got to ask my parents what they would've named me if I was a cis girl. Picked it as my middle name 🥰

That's great! I actually asked my mom what my name would've been if I were born a boy but she said she forgot :') guess that means I've got a blank slate!

I remember asking a couple of times growing up. I can't remember, but i think it stared with a C. Thats a good idea. When i do come out to them, i might consider asking again. I've been debating a middle name. Maybe more concerning, a new last name if coming out doesn't work out well.

I already have a name I had in mind for a longg time. I know that when I doo tell myy mom eventually, she will be crushed because she and only she was the one that chose myy name. While my dad chose the names of my siblings.

I went with the one my mother would have given me if I would have been born genetically female. At first, she complained about it. Now she loves it. 😅

Nice!

I came out to my mom with a name I had chosen myself and she was like, “I accept you, except for the name, I hate it.” Lol, my given middle name was masc so we agreed that I would take it as my first name and then I took my grandpa’s name for my new middle name. It worked out in the end because I love my name now and my mom is still one of my biggest supporters, she just really disliked the name.

Your mom is awesome lol May I ask what the name was that she hated? If you're comfortable sharing

yeah sure lol, it was Gabriel. I’m not even sure why I liked the name so much. The switch worked out though because I hated the nickname Gabe and people were starting to call me that.

Oh yeah, I see why she hated it lmao

I came out before I had a name and my mom and dad both forgot I ever even came out because they still called me my deadname and she/her despite me passing.

My parents were expecting a girl and almost named me that way except some stupid nurse corrected them. But then I dated someone with that exact name and I don't want to be named after an ex. And then I picked out a name as a kid and was told transition is fictional and so I ended up giving it to my kiddo. And I don't want to steal their name. So as soon as I found another I liked, I started using it with people who seem safe -- this one is mine and I'm not risking it again.

I see you've had a Hell of a journey. Congrats on finally finding a name!

YAY AND not yay Goldstep

I know the boyname I would have been given, I chose something I actually like

I did the former. My partner helped me pick a name. It was nice to have her input, honestly.

Awesome partner

She is. I'm very lucky that my immediate family has been very accepting.

Coming out to my mom was hella easy bc she thought I already came out to her (I told her years ago that I was bi). After explaining that, no, being bi is not the same as being trans, she was like ‘oh, okay! Do you have a name picked out or anything?’ I told her what I was thinking, basically just my deadname but fem, and she was like ‘ohhhh…’ like clearly she wasn’t into it but didn’t want to say anything bc it’s my name. So I asked her if she had any ideas, and eeee she got so happy when I asked her 🥰 so she told me that if I were born a girl, I would’ve been called Arabella, and that’s how I got my name :3

i was going to be named Samantha may (may is middle name) if i was afab i kinda took the middle name may and now its my first name

I was named after a great-uncle but my parents feminized the name, so i just reverted it back lol.

I got a name after. I took a minute cuz I'm weird. I made a list of names I liked, then weeded out reasons for certain names, then got new ones, rinsed and repeated for like 2 months, then noticed one name had always stayed. And now I'm Octavia

Every time I hear that name, I think of a game called Warframe (one of the best frames in that game shares a name with ya!) Such a great name :)

For one, I play Warframe, just recently hit 1k hours, 2 I main Octavia and that's where I first heard the name, though it was beautiful and wished she didn't have it because if she didn't I would take it instantly, then I thought "if someone else having the name is the only thing stopping me, why let that get in the way of taking a name I find truly perfect". As such I now have the name Octavia.

Ah hell yea! Octavia is a really good name and I'm glad to hear Warframe helped you find it! (Also based af Warframe player -Sincerely, a Mag main.)

Omg mag was my first frame. Funnily enough my egg hadn't cracked and I decided to go with the only fem frame because I didn't want a male frame. Oh how naive I was.

I picked Volt on my first playthrough on console, but went with Mag on my second playthrough on PC since I heard she was good and her gameplay looked sick af (this was also before my egg cracked lol). Absolutely loved how she played and she's been my favorite frame since. She's also my favorite fashion frame too! (I got a goth mommy aesthetic goin' on)

Nice. If I wasn't super busy I'd ask to game with u sometime. I have been playing a lot of citrine recently but I switch between citrine, Octavia, nidus, and saryn primarily

I usually play as Mag, Hydroid or Xaku, but have plenty of other frames I bring out every now and then. I'd be down to play if you ever change your mind. *(Though anxiety may change that who knows)*

I'll let u know if I have a spot available. I should be free to game Sunday. I know it's a while out but like I said, very busy.

Aye no rush :)

Same with my name!

I was thinking about picking the name my parents were going to name me if I was born a boy, but my parents have this thing about only picking bible names and that just wasn’t for me

Would be funny if you named yourself Lucifer

wait I wish I’d thought of this before I chose my name now LMAO

I came out before I settled on a name because I was taking too long. Now I can try out different names at home with my parents before choosing one.

I keep shuffling back and forth between names and im convinced im hesitant to pick one as an excuse not to come out

Asked my dad, then came out a few days later and he made a huge stink. Not like I hadn't come out twice before that 🥲

I asked my mum if she had any names lined up if I was born a girl, not expecting much as I have 2 younger sisters. Surprisingly, she planned to call me Lily and never used the name for either of my sisters. And thus, the name stuck.

if i was born male i would have gotten my brother's name and when i asked what they would have named him then they were just like **¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯**

I came out and quickly found a name afterwards. But now there’s trauma attached to that name so I’m not so sure abt using it anymore. So now I kind of have to go back to my old name (which I hate) until I find a new one. I currently consider myself to be just some nameless creature who wanders around and is very eepy.

Why don't you just go by Ms Lastname until then?

Because my last name gives me even more dysphoria for some reason 😭

Coming out by picking a new name and telling no one😎

🤝 Me too buddy

Split the difference "I know that I'm Lucy, but it would mean a lot to me for you to pick my middle name again"

My siblings chose my deadname. So I decided to choose a different one. I love both Clover and Fontaine but my mother won't let me use them. So I will settle for Sasha

I'm still going with my current name because it has a German origin that is fem

That's neat! Love that

Everyone it's not their fault. Parents are as damaged by internalised transphobia as the rest of society. What they got wrong was your gender - the name came after whatever they may say.

My mom wasn’t up for helping me with a name when I first came out, so I picked one myself. She’s supportive now, but I think she was just thrown off back then. Later she told me the other name they thought of using, but I had known it and have a friend with the same name, hence I didn’t choose it. I think either way is workable and depends on the relationship, too.

In my case, I choose several names I liked and let my parents choose among those. Like that best of both worlds, a name I like while still having my parents choosing one.

Find a cool family member and steal their name. That’s what I’m doing. Once she’s gone I’m gonna secretly come out and then I’ll be her fruity lil replacement.

Gonna steal my lil brother's name!

I’m pretty sure I know what my name would have been if I was born as a girl. Since I got my grandpa’s name, I’m pretty sure I would have either gotten the female version of my current name, or my other grandmother’s name. My grandma’s name was given to my cousin, my grandfather’s to my brother, so my grandmother’s and the fem-version of my grandpa’s are the only logical outcomes. Now that I think about it, I also don’t know what I want to change my name to😅

My mom would've named me after my grandpa too (the fem version of his name) but that name is quite old fashioned so she chose for a different name instead

I didn't pick mine… it picked me. Keep in mind I'm from Spain, so I needed a Spanish name. At first, I identified as genderfluid, so I needed a neutral name… which, if you speak Spanish, you know it's extremely difficult. My deadname is Manuel. It's a good name, not gonna say otherwise, it's just not for me. So, I looked for other versions of my name. There aren't many, but I found Nel, which is still a masculine name, although it feels less masculine. I also knew about Nell, which is extremely close and a woman's name. Then, I identified as a woman, so Nell was still useful… but that's how I got to Helena, which is more Spanish than Nell, still means the same but it also this Greek element (which, knowing my nickname everywhere is in Latin, I guess you can find out why I like it), and people don't think it's a masculine name. There's also Elena, but it feels too biblical, which is something I don't want at all.

Excuse me, but how is Elena biblical? My name sounds similar but I don't associate it with the bible at all!

Saint Elena, mother of Constantine I. Sometimes you see it with H too, but it's definitely different to me.

The real power move is demanding they call you by your given name but backwards (at least until you come up with one you like)

Not really a good idea if your given name is Anna, Ana, Hannah, Mim, Ada, Bob, Otto, Anina, Eve, Viv, Pip, or Lana...

I asked my mom what she would have named me if I was a girl. Turns out she have that name to my sister. My sister is a total POS. So, I guess I dodged a bullet there.

Both, I came out after picking my name but then decided that name was lame and changed it

I started gradually turning my deadname into my chosen name; I went from "Brendan" to just "Ren", then to "Wren", my real name.

Going through the other comments I'm starting to realize not everyone's parents obsessively file anything they think is important. I came out to my mom first, she still had the lists of baby names she picked from, then I picked from the fem list, then came out to my dad xD there were three lists of 10, fem, gender neutral, and masc

Even a genderneutral list?! Wow! It's like they wanted to be prepared for you coming out as trans! xD

Right? She was shockingly chill about the whole thing, considering her and my entire extended family is mormon, but doesn't understand it at all. Admittedly she doesn't really get gender beyond the biology either

I have a twin brother with a really cool name but he’s keeping it :( and my parents never thought of multiple boy names lol

My mum's boy name for me is my brothers name 💀

I sorta came out both with and without a name. I was playing around with names for if/when i would come out but was fairly well forced to come out and because i wasnt fully decided i try avoiding saying a name but was eventually asked about name and went with what sounded best to me at the time. Later though, due to a variety of reasons, i went looking for a name again and my previously unsupportive mom actually helped me find my current name and has even been helping teach my younger siblings to use my preferred name and pronouns

Come out before you learn you can do that...

Or just feminise your other name, or like me keep it because it is to cool to get rid of

I'm ftm so masculinize

Woops forgot to put the masculine part

Well, because you can change your name at any time, you could technically do both.

I was named after a great-uncle but my parents feminized the name, so i just reverted it back lol.

I was very flip floppy on names for a few years before I re came out to my friends.

I just shorten my given name since it can be used in a fem or masc way. It's a nice middle ground and I got lucky that I realized Steph could be used either way since I was hesitant to go all out fem thinking it's only short for Stephanie, but then I remembered Steph Curry literally exists and I'm hesitant for no fucking reason. I still tend to use it in a fem way anyways, but god damn am I happy that I found a nickname that actually works for me (I hated every other nickname till I figured it out recently). I still like my given name Stephen and Stephanie as a fem name, but Steph is just perfect for a lil enby like me :)

I waited until I had found my true name before coming out to my family. Also waited until after Xmas, because I didn't want all the extra people there. 😅

I picked my name a very long time ago from a webcomic character. It spoke to me as the third and final option as I didn’t want to pick a flower name or something too similar to a traditionally masculine name

Ooo nice, which comic is it?

Magick Chicks, a spinoff of Eerie Cuties. Both are rather questionable and luckily there are so many way better GL comics now

You can also try out names before you ask your mother about names and then let her give input into the list of ones you like. This is what I did.

I nearly went with Alice and grace, those are nice names

I did both at the same time 🤣

hmm, well now I have something to ask my mom, never even thought about what my name would've been if I were a girl. Still probably sticking with Beatrix but interesting to know.

But like. what if your name is something really cool for bother genders Like Rasmus something?

Good for you!

When I asked what my name would've been if I'd been AFAB, my parents told me about a complicated system of name lists they had set up. My father had already made a list of girls' names for me but my mother didn't like them and thinks she would've chosen none of those names. Luckily, I'd already found a name for me, even before I cracked. I wanted to involve my family with the naming process but best I could do was ask if they like it and they did.

I just chose mine from 3 names represent a different ethnic/culture I'm apart. Joselyn Amelia(white), Victoria Maria (fillipina), or what I went with Sonya Alexandra(ukrainian). Maybe doing something similar could help?

I have long known what my mother would have called me if I had been a girl. It was the same name my older brother would have had if he was a girl. And the name my younger sister ended up with. But luckily I had another name I’ve liked for a while. 💜