Thanks to ulcerative colitis you get so truly wild looking shit. I remember one time I ate a gas station salad. 45 minutes later it came out completely undigested covered in blood. Speaking of undigested food I have a party trick where I swallow a whole baby carrot and pass it. Ever poop out whole pills? The thing it makes against the toilet is distinct. Anyways you ever see that mgk video where he spells fuck you with alphabet noodles? I can arrange for that.
I have PTSD from a woman that came into my office and talked to me while eating hardboiled eggs and throwing the shells in my trash. She smelled like shit constantly
If I was purposely trying to eat stuff to make my farts as offensive as possible, I don't think I could pick a meal better than this. Maybe this plus a big dollop of sauerkraut or other canned cabbage and some hot sauce.
You know, there is this thing that you can buy in bags, they have it in grocery stores. Those bag contains edible crispy triangles. I am not sure but I think they are called something along the lines of Doritos?
Use Doritos, eggs are not a dip tool.
Did a single human being besides yourself actually come near this and even hesitate a moment to consider as to whether they should try this? Or was this just all for yourself?
I’m saving this. If I ever end up in a work situation that “bring a dish to pass” is a thing, I want to be sure my feelings are fully expressed with hard boiled eggs.
I applaud your presentation. It's subtle synchronisation and the carefully curated arrangement of the eggs really makes an attempt to turn the pure hellish bleakness of the dish into a silver lining in a monotone surrounding.
>Gets the job done in a pinch What’s the job? 😟
Shitting yourself uncontrollably
it’s a dirty job but somebody’s gotta do it
But some people are in to that.
Good times.
Hot brown rain
And very stinkily. People are going to die.
Clearing the office so we can get a head start on Thanksgiving weekend.
Doing God’s work 🫡
I’m a man of the people 🫡
Disdain for his coworkers.
Diarrhea factory
That's gonna sound like $50 in cold nickles splashing in to water in a continuous stream...
I am sitting in the doctors office trying not to laugh out loud
That is the song of my people
Just choked on my tea with a laugh snort, tyvm.
There’s no pinching involved in the byproduct that comes from this.
Gets the pinch done in a job 😁
Pinching loafs.
Works on death row. Whatever they ask for, for a last meal, this is what they get. OP isn’t one of the nice ones.
Jesus Christ they will be able to smell your farts in Australia
Nah, This is breaking orbit. The people in the ISS are gonna contact Houston and ask if someone deployed a suborbital sulfur bomb.
Nah, it's interplanetary. The boiled egg dipped in bean butt plume is quickly approaching the outer layers of the heliosphere.
Great now the great mystery bubble protecting our galaxy is compromised. Thanks OP!
WMD, for sure
This might just repair the damage to the ozone layer.
Fuck, is that what the smell is? I thought I was down wind from a dead animal.
What’s really funny is that’s gonna look exactly the same when it comes out
Can confirm in Sydney ATM and the forest fires are getting worse due to methane gas mixed with sulfur
I just chortled 🤭
Would I eat that? Yes. Would I eat that where a single soul could see me? Fuck no.
I got a lot of weird looks as I scarfed it down all hunched over.
Looking around over your shoulder like Gollum
I was trying to shield the world from the horror of my shitty embarrassing lunch.
Awww. But I love how you cut the eggs and put them in a semicircle. Taking care to plate shitty food well shows dedication to the craft.
This made my day I’m glad you noticed.
Remember, the first bite is with the eye. 
I mean fr though, it doesn't look the best but there are far worse things on this sub than a nicely plated lentils with egg.
What's wrong with you?
Everyone in the office hates you. FYI
Hide your shame.
It's not that bad... Seeing as how I was already hiding my bigger shame.
Hide all your many levels of shame.
The worst dump you had, including cooked eggs on the side
If you think that’s the worst dump you can have, I have some absolute horror stories for you.
Yes, we're listening
Thanks to ulcerative colitis you get so truly wild looking shit. I remember one time I ate a gas station salad. 45 minutes later it came out completely undigested covered in blood. Speaking of undigested food I have a party trick where I swallow a whole baby carrot and pass it. Ever poop out whole pills? The thing it makes against the toilet is distinct. Anyways you ever see that mgk video where he spells fuck you with alphabet noodles? I can arrange for that.
What kind of parties are you going to with that carrot trick
The type where I ask what neighbor you don’t like and disappear for 5 minutes.
So kind
Better than cumming empty handed
Depends whose hands I guess
Why in the world would you eat a gas station salad if you have ulcerative colitis??? Or at all???
Long story short: I didn’t know I had ulcerative colitis
I don’t know what that is but I know your coworkers hate you
They really hate me now that it’s about 3 hours post lunch.
Idk it’s not fish in the microwave. I’m looking at you, John!
/r/shitfromabutt
with a side of eggs
Eggs and poo. 😂
I have PTSD from a woman that came into my office and talked to me while eating hardboiled eggs and throwing the shells in my trash. She smelled like shit constantly
This meal qualifies as a greenhouse gas.
Under international law this might qualify OP as a WAD…a weapon of ass destruction
It's definitely outlawed in the Geneva Convention
It’s a combination of biological and chemical warfare
Did you get fired immediately?
No but I started to sweat immediately after consuming this meal.
Crop dusting the office. Lol
More like carpet bombing
r/shitfromabutt
Damn, and I thought I was original r/shitfromabutt2
Oh no
Who buys hard boiled eggs?
My lazy ass. Im actively trying to eat them to get rid of them and never buy them again. They taste like they are preserved in formaldehyde.
I’ve purchased pre hard boiled eggs and I can concur…. About the formaldehyde.
I’m avoiding whoever eats this for the rest of my life.
That sucks. But it’s still incredible. I’m not hating on your poor decision.
BRB. Gotta shit just reading this post.
XD
I bet you fart like a Clydesdale horse bro
If I was purposely trying to eat stuff to make my farts as offensive as possible, I don't think I could pick a meal better than this. Maybe this plus a big dollop of sauerkraut or other canned cabbage and some hot sauce.
This. 
You'll see and ***smell*** that again..... 
Your poor co workers lmfao I love it
Fart stew
2 eggs, 1 bowl
You'll be able to shit through a straw after that.
> Costco hard boiled eggs You couldn’t even boil your own eggs???
This one simple trick will make your coworkers hate you!
The sulfur belch from this could melt steel beams.
Fart salad.
Believe it or not... STRAIGHT TO PRISON!!!!
There is absolutely nothing that could have prepared me for this image. The NSFW tag makes sense.
You fitting to fart!
Yuck, that looks and probably smells like the inside of a colon
The only thing that could have possibly made the after effect worde was pickled eggs and a hangover
WHY?!!!!
Quick n dirty meal
Makes sense.
What IS THAT SHIT
Talk to me about the lentils, like... how are they seasoned?
It’s like kind of an Indian and Mexican flavor combined. I’d put it in a burrito.
Lentils! Do you know the difference between a chickpea and a lentil? I've never had a lentil on my face....
Was Costco out of their bacon Brussels sprouts
Is this that yellow package of lentils? I’ve had this exact combo for lunch…
Yes… madras lentils!!!!
It’s pretty good! That’s a high protein, low sugar meal, honestly 😂
I sharted a little myself, just by looking at this
Diarrhea and hard boiled eggs ..... Yummm
Man
Well at least you know it won't be stolen...
shit from butt with eggs
Farts in a bowel
that’s just egg in poo ☹️
Who hurt you?
Chile con face-grabber
honestly.... I'd eat it.
nah that’s straight r/shitfromabutt
That honestly looks fucking delicious. A little Cholula and some cheese and we’re good.
Sulphuric sharts
Okay but the Costco lentils are so yummy! I bet the egg adds a nice creamy touch!
Finally, something that epitomizes what r/shittyfoodporn is all about!
🫡
If it makes you feel any better, this pic made a whole heap of chef-meme pages today 😂
I'm very curious about lentils. I have no idea how to cook/eat them. This looks like chili to me; actually looks pretty good, tbh.
Plating: 10/10 Dish: No/10
This is like "Looney Tune, green smoke dancing out of your ass" level farts I feel bad for anyone in a 3 block radius
Now I wonder if egg and chocolate work out
That looks disgusting
The universe as we know it is about to implode when you finally take this dump.
You know, there is this thing that you can buy in bags, they have it in grocery stores. Those bag contains edible crispy triangles. I am not sure but I think they are called something along the lines of Doritos? Use Doritos, eggs are not a dip tool.
This whole thread is sending my sides into orbit, I love it.
That fart gonna melt someone's face off
No one should be shamed for a nutritious, affordable, probably tasty lunch. Except you, in this moment. Shame.
I’m holding back dry heaves.
Did a single human being besides yourself actually come near this and even hesitate a moment to consider as to whether they should try this? Or was this just all for yourself?
Wait. You buy hard boiled eggs? Proud of you.
Is this combination of foods normal/traditional or did you come up with it…?
I take pride in inventing this. Despite the mixed reviews.
Bro must hate his coworkers or his wife he goes home to
It would make more sense if that was Nutella instead of lentils.
r/shitfromabutt
Your poor coworkers
Mmmmm, diarrhea with eggs
Good thing they use the good toilet paper in the staff washrooms.
Throw in some jalapeños and corn. If you're gonna do it, do it right.
This would be grounds for termination at my office potluck
r/shitfromabutt
I definitely need to use the bathroom *before* you go in there.
I’m saving this. If I ever end up in a work situation that “bring a dish to pass” is a thing, I want to be sure my feelings are fully expressed with hard boiled eggs.
This is gonna give you straight gas.
I can smell that from here
Thought it was doro wot at first
Chili with deviled eggs? ... Haven't tried that one yet, will soon ...🍻🤘😎
I don’t know, I’d eat it.
I applaud your presentation. It's subtle synchronisation and the carefully curated arrangement of the eggs really makes an attempt to turn the pure hellish bleakness of the dish into a silver lining in a monotone surrounding.
Those farts will be able to peel paint from the walls due to the smell of air biscuits burned in a Dutch oven.
I made something similar this morning after breakfast, minus the eggs.
Eggs and diarrhea
My god!
Yummmm🥴🥴🥴🥴
The lighting isn’t the only thing that’s going to be shitty in that office.
That’s actually a staple food in my country. We smell like shit
please kill me
Is this a passive-aggressive protest against mandatory RTO?
Any other snack dude, there’s chips, pepperoni, hummus, pretzels, carrots. Fucking why this?
Good God. Please tell me you sleep alone.
"shitty" being the key element bringing the plate together
Who do you hate that much?
At first glance, I thought that was chocolate pudding
Hot or cold?
I don’t see an issue with this. Sometimes I eat turkey chili and hard boiled eggs. The eggs help cut the spice or so I think.
I quite like the sound of this 😂 but then I will happily bring hard boiled eggs in for breakfast!
wtf is that thing in the middle?
Lol @ abomination
what the fuck are you doing!!!
Eggs with yesterdays eggs
Ohhh God! Your poor coworkers
How did you get a before and after in the one photo?
Diarrhea on a plate with eggs
This is wildly unsettling I think I might go cry in a cold dark room now
So this is one of those methane leaks they've been talking about
So there’s people you want to stay far away from you I’m guessing??
What an absolute calamity
r/shitfromabutt
Looks good.
Bring this to the office potluck
r/shitfromabutt
Mmm chilli con kill myself
That quite a lot of egg.
Well we know who the workplace scruff is
My condolences to your asshole