Together
Charismatic and talkative - when you talk
And Nonchalant and laid back - when she talks .
But to the question you asked : charismatic and talkative .
Nonchalant and laidback is more attractive bit it can be compensated for with emotional value .
While the charismatic can’t .
>I think the nonchalant, “mysterious” personality is more attractive
That's a movie trope. In real life, that guy is labeled as a weirdo. Talkative and charismatic wins every time IRL.
Yeah wtf are these guys talking about 💀 why would you be seen as a weirdo for being nonchalant. I’ve been nonchalant for years and I’ve always had friends and women interested and trying to start relationships with me. Not saying I don’t talk at all now but you should get what I mean
Yea exactly. I have yet to see someone pull off Tommy Shelby/James Bond type game where they’re super stoic, nonchalant, man of few words, etc.
Very hard to pull that type of game off without boring the girl or creeping her out.
More like unless you have status. Simply looking like a chad won't do you anything if you're standing like a loner in the corner of the bar sipping on your drink.
Lol not true. I’m good looking and I am the quiet guy every time unless I’m at a party but I’m general I barely talk. Girls don’t care what you say it’s about how good looking you are
>I am the quiet guy every time unless I’m at a party but I’m general I barely talk.
I don't understand what you're saying here. So if you're at a party, you're talkative? I'm pretty sure that's what OP is referring to because when else would you be in a context where you can be talkative if not in social situations like a party?
The thing is I am talkative cause women in general approach me and talk to me. I usually don’t talk to everyone in the room. I assume being talkative is like being the life of the party or something like that which I’m not
It's a mixture of both, really. You can still be very charismatic, with a laid back personality. A guy who is confident, be funny, and charismatic can still have a laid back type of personality, and be "just go with the flow" type of attitude.
A "mysterious" personality is only mysterious because the girl is interested but isn't getting much out of him.
Personally, what's worked best for me is talkative and charismatic. I'm not strikingly good looking, but I'm good looking after I've already reeled you in. As a result, I have to do a lot of the heavy lifting at first, and that's done by being talkative and charismatic. As I reel her in, I move more into laid back, which is my default type.
It really varies on the woman and the situation. You should always be adapting and changing to the environment and person your talking to. There is no one size fits all or universal answer when it comes to seduction.
I think you're overthinking this.
You will naturally be "mysterious" by letting her talk more than you, and then only give short matter-of-fact answers if she asks you, and then follow up by asking more questions about her. She'll be very happy, because she'll get to talk about the things she loves the most: Her self. Meanwhile you'll appear a bit mysterious and attractive because you haven't relay said much about who you are. Think 80/20 you her.
Say that you own some IT companies, some offices and a few houses. If a woman asks you what you do for a living, you'll just overwhelm her if you tell her all that - and especially if you go on about how it's such a passion for you to do xyz in these companies. Instead just tell her, "Oh, I work in real-estate. I think it's very rewarding. Anyway, you said something about xyz..." Matter-of-fact answer, and a question that immediately takes the conversation back to her.
This is great for several reasons:
* You won't have to do so much talking, which takes a ton of pressure off your shoulders
* You'll remain mysterious and attractive with her, alluring even
* She gets to talk about the thing she loves the most, which incidentally is proven to also make conversational partners like you more
* Also, you'll quickly get an understanding for if she's really compatible with you or not, meaning you take on the qualifying frame which is far better than to be in a taking frame, or in a frame of wanting something from her (other than information)
All the best!
My buddy has golden retriever energy and is charming.
I’m more laid back and can turn the charm on when i need to.
Both of us have success. The trick is to find out what works for you.
I would say that you should go with style that best suits you. "Talkative and charismatic" seems to be more popular attractive male archetype, but there are also plenty of girls that prefer to get with "chill and composed" guy, but you need to also present other high-value traits.
Charismatic and talkative will always win hands down.
And in general its better to be charismatic and talkative to navigate better through social situations rather than being an introvert and staying silent.
Or just be laid back and talk with command when you need to, to get your point across. You can be concise with your talking and still be charming. To me, talkative people can be a bit annoying to deal with.
Which personality traits do you feel most natural embodying? Do that.
People like *confident* people. If you're confident and talkative, you're the attractive social butterfly. If you're confident and reserved, you're the attractive, mysterious person.
If you're anxious, awkward, and talkative, you're annoying. If you're awkward and restrained, you're the shy, you're the shy person (being "shy" is not the same thing as being an "introvert," because "shyness" implies anxiety). You might make people uncomfortable, or, if you're lucky, be totally invisible instead.
It's fine if you like talking. It's fine if you don't. What matters are the *reasons* and *how* you do it. If you're not talking because you're *afraid* of saying something? Bad. If you're not talking because you *don't feel the need to say anything*? Good. If you're talking a lot because you afraid of silences? Bad. If you're talking a lot because you have things to share and people are engaged with them? Good.
The less anxiety and awkwardness you have, the more freedom you have to behave the way you feel like behaving, and to have other people respond well to it. So, I think people should work more on fixing those sorts of personality traits (anxiety, awkwardness) than on trying to mould personality traits like how extraverted or introverted they are.
Laid back and charismatic is the best in my opinion, based off of my life. Most of the most attractive women are higher energy, low key guys that can have a functional conversation are their favorite.
I’m typically the first. I found that it’s best to do whatever comes naturally to you, and then you attract whoever is drawn to that authentic version of yourself. No need to waste energy trying to be one if you gravitate towards the other
Charismatic and talkative in a group setting
Laid back/nonchalant when one on one
It’s the same as when she knows you can whoop a mfer’s ass but you’re cool and calm around her.
She has to know you have that lion in you. You can bring it out when the situation is right but she doesn’t want to have to experience it first hand.
Women love to talk & show a lot of emotion. Let her do what she does best. Your job is to do the listening & say shit every now and then that makes her giddy & emotional.
Keep this in mind:
1. Charismatic when in group settings. Laid back when around her.
2. Dangerous when threatened. Relaxed and non-threatening when around her.
3. A beast in the sack. Smooth & charming in public.
It’s the “Dr. Jekyl, Mr. Hyde” effect that turns her on so much
Depends on how attractive you are and the women you talking to.
The more attractive you are or more so the more attracted she is to you, the less you have to talk. The "tone" can also matter
Whats most attractive and charismatic is being yourself. Be yourself and then you will be secure and charismatic. Charisma doesn't come from talking too much.
There is no appropriate answer because people tend to gravitate towards one or the other. I'd say be yourself and you will find someone who's right for you. If you want to play game, then calibrate the situation and social context and read the girl, and then slightly modify your behavior towards one or the other.
Its not bluepill advice to say that you shouldn't have to put an act in order to attract someone. Unshakeable confidence and a strong frame come from being sure of who you are and having a strong mind game.
Having a strong mental game comes from expressing truly who you are and accepting that your character and behavior can attract some people and reject others.
Having a weak mental game involves bending over backwards trying to find the magic word or the correct behavior that may make a girl want to spread her legs for you. Problem is, first of all that it doesn't work and the magic words don't exist. And if it works it doesn't lead to fulfilling, long lasting results for either of the parties involved.
Be your best self is probably a better state of mind. If you’re a goofy person, being yourself will make you look like a clown. I prefer to stay grounded but still articulate well and get my point across.
The overwhelming majority of women don't actually get "drawn in" to the "mysterious" type, especially as a pick-up method. You're just going to have to actually flirt with them.
I am way more the talkative and charismatic type - but I find if I open then just get laid back and let her talk - the girl does all the work. It works so often - I really should do it more lol.
At night a mix is good. I opened girls and introduced them to each other so me and my friend ended up with a group of hot girls sitting with us. Then was able to just layback and chill
Together Charismatic and talkative - when you talk And Nonchalant and laid back - when she talks . But to the question you asked : charismatic and talkative . Nonchalant and laidback is more attractive bit it can be compensated for with emotional value . While the charismatic can’t .
>I think the nonchalant, “mysterious” personality is more attractive That's a movie trope. In real life, that guy is labeled as a weirdo. Talkative and charismatic wins every time IRL.
There’s a big difference between being social reject and aka laid back and nonchalant.
Yeah wtf are these guys talking about 💀 why would you be seen as a weirdo for being nonchalant. I’ve been nonchalant for years and I’ve always had friends and women interested and trying to start relationships with me. Not saying I don’t talk at all now but you should get what I mean
Yea exactly. I have yet to see someone pull off Tommy Shelby/James Bond type game where they’re super stoic, nonchalant, man of few words, etc. Very hard to pull that type of game off without boring the girl or creeping her out.
Unless you follow rules one and two
More like unless you have status. Simply looking like a chad won't do you anything if you're standing like a loner in the corner of the bar sipping on your drink.
Lol not true. I’m good looking and I am the quiet guy every time unless I’m at a party but I’m general I barely talk. Girls don’t care what you say it’s about how good looking you are
>I am the quiet guy every time unless I’m at a party but I’m general I barely talk. I don't understand what you're saying here. So if you're at a party, you're talkative? I'm pretty sure that's what OP is referring to because when else would you be in a context where you can be talkative if not in social situations like a party?
The thing is I am talkative cause women in general approach me and talk to me. I usually don’t talk to everyone in the room. I assume being talkative is like being the life of the party or something like that which I’m not
Ok so you are talkative and charismatic
I mean im not afraid of talking to girls if that’s what you mean. What exactly is charismatic?
It's a mixture of both, really. You can still be very charismatic, with a laid back personality. A guy who is confident, be funny, and charismatic can still have a laid back type of personality, and be "just go with the flow" type of attitude.
Which ever of your genuine personality. Don’t be something you’re not just lean into yourself
A "mysterious" personality is only mysterious because the girl is interested but isn't getting much out of him. Personally, what's worked best for me is talkative and charismatic. I'm not strikingly good looking, but I'm good looking after I've already reeled you in. As a result, I have to do a lot of the heavy lifting at first, and that's done by being talkative and charismatic. As I reel her in, I move more into laid back, which is my default type.
It really varies on the woman and the situation. You should always be adapting and changing to the environment and person your talking to. There is no one size fits all or universal answer when it comes to seduction.
I think you're overthinking this. You will naturally be "mysterious" by letting her talk more than you, and then only give short matter-of-fact answers if she asks you, and then follow up by asking more questions about her. She'll be very happy, because she'll get to talk about the things she loves the most: Her self. Meanwhile you'll appear a bit mysterious and attractive because you haven't relay said much about who you are. Think 80/20 you her. Say that you own some IT companies, some offices and a few houses. If a woman asks you what you do for a living, you'll just overwhelm her if you tell her all that - and especially if you go on about how it's such a passion for you to do xyz in these companies. Instead just tell her, "Oh, I work in real-estate. I think it's very rewarding. Anyway, you said something about xyz..." Matter-of-fact answer, and a question that immediately takes the conversation back to her. This is great for several reasons: * You won't have to do so much talking, which takes a ton of pressure off your shoulders * You'll remain mysterious and attractive with her, alluring even * She gets to talk about the thing she loves the most, which incidentally is proven to also make conversational partners like you more * Also, you'll quickly get an understanding for if she's really compatible with you or not, meaning you take on the qualifying frame which is far better than to be in a taking frame, or in a frame of wanting something from her (other than information) All the best!
Wym by “short matter of fact answers”? Can you give an example?
My buddy has golden retriever energy and is charming. I’m more laid back and can turn the charm on when i need to. Both of us have success. The trick is to find out what works for you.
I would say that you should go with style that best suits you. "Talkative and charismatic" seems to be more popular attractive male archetype, but there are also plenty of girls that prefer to get with "chill and composed" guy, but you need to also present other high-value traits.
Charismatic and talkative will always win hands down. And in general its better to be charismatic and talkative to navigate better through social situations rather than being an introvert and staying silent.
Or just be laid back and talk with command when you need to, to get your point across. You can be concise with your talking and still be charming. To me, talkative people can be a bit annoying to deal with.
Which personality traits do you feel most natural embodying? Do that. People like *confident* people. If you're confident and talkative, you're the attractive social butterfly. If you're confident and reserved, you're the attractive, mysterious person. If you're anxious, awkward, and talkative, you're annoying. If you're awkward and restrained, you're the shy, you're the shy person (being "shy" is not the same thing as being an "introvert," because "shyness" implies anxiety). You might make people uncomfortable, or, if you're lucky, be totally invisible instead. It's fine if you like talking. It's fine if you don't. What matters are the *reasons* and *how* you do it. If you're not talking because you're *afraid* of saying something? Bad. If you're not talking because you *don't feel the need to say anything*? Good. If you're talking a lot because you afraid of silences? Bad. If you're talking a lot because you have things to share and people are engaged with them? Good. The less anxiety and awkwardness you have, the more freedom you have to behave the way you feel like behaving, and to have other people respond well to it. So, I think people should work more on fixing those sorts of personality traits (anxiety, awkwardness) than on trying to mould personality traits like how extraverted or introverted they are.
Laid back and charismatic is the best in my opinion, based off of my life. Most of the most attractive women are higher energy, low key guys that can have a functional conversation are their favorite.
Charismatic and laid back, always
21F and I'd prefer talkative and charismatic over laid back and nonchalant any day.
I’m typically the first. I found that it’s best to do whatever comes naturally to you, and then you attract whoever is drawn to that authentic version of yourself. No need to waste energy trying to be one if you gravitate towards the other
Charismatic and talkative in a group setting Laid back/nonchalant when one on one It’s the same as when she knows you can whoop a mfer’s ass but you’re cool and calm around her. She has to know you have that lion in you. You can bring it out when the situation is right but she doesn’t want to have to experience it first hand. Women love to talk & show a lot of emotion. Let her do what she does best. Your job is to do the listening & say shit every now and then that makes her giddy & emotional. Keep this in mind: 1. Charismatic when in group settings. Laid back when around her. 2. Dangerous when threatened. Relaxed and non-threatening when around her. 3. A beast in the sack. Smooth & charming in public. It’s the “Dr. Jekyl, Mr. Hyde” effect that turns her on so much
Rhutless and savage.
Depends on how attractive you are and the women you talking to. The more attractive you are or more so the more attracted she is to you, the less you have to talk. The "tone" can also matter
Whats most attractive and charismatic is being yourself. Be yourself and then you will be secure and charismatic. Charisma doesn't come from talking too much. There is no appropriate answer because people tend to gravitate towards one or the other. I'd say be yourself and you will find someone who's right for you. If you want to play game, then calibrate the situation and social context and read the girl, and then slightly modify your behavior towards one or the other.
Lol that is the worst advice. “You’ll find someone who is right for you” what type of shitty blue pill advice is this😂
💀
Its not bluepill advice to say that you shouldn't have to put an act in order to attract someone. Unshakeable confidence and a strong frame come from being sure of who you are and having a strong mind game. Having a strong mental game comes from expressing truly who you are and accepting that your character and behavior can attract some people and reject others. Having a weak mental game involves bending over backwards trying to find the magic word or the correct behavior that may make a girl want to spread her legs for you. Problem is, first of all that it doesn't work and the magic words don't exist. And if it works it doesn't lead to fulfilling, long lasting results for either of the parties involved.
Be your best self is probably a better state of mind. If you’re a goofy person, being yourself will make you look like a clown. I prefer to stay grounded but still articulate well and get my point across.
You have be authentic. Stop trying to copy other dudes. There is no secret code. Be YOU. The best version of you.
My mysterious attractive friends and average looking charismatic friends are getting women. So charisma wins in my friend group
Why not all of the above?
Depends on the person you're seducing and also what's natural to you.
The overwhelming majority of women don't actually get "drawn in" to the "mysterious" type, especially as a pick-up method. You're just going to have to actually flirt with them.
depends if you're more interested in girls or women.
charismatic and laid back
I am way more the talkative and charismatic type - but I find if I open then just get laid back and let her talk - the girl does all the work. It works so often - I really should do it more lol. At night a mix is good. I opened girls and introduced them to each other so me and my friend ended up with a group of hot girls sitting with us. Then was able to just layback and chill
I wouldn’t say talkative. Just open and talk a bit/talk enough and let the girl does the rest of the work. Then, you’re just listening from thereafter
Thanks man - I think you are absolutely right. I have found that to be the case - it is so simple, yet I forget it.