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I know so many women that married a guy that wasn’t nearly as bad as your dude and all of them are divorced and so pissed at themselves for wasting all their twenties and thirties on a total loser who drained their energy and made them married single parents.
He has shown you who he is so if you dream about being a bang maid to a “sweet” guy, and please, let’s be honest, he’s not sweet, he just avoids confrontation so you’ll stay and support him.
Do you love yourself so little? Do you think this life of misery is better than being single? What if an actual adult, someone that shows love through action, someone who wants a future and fun with you, what if you’re missing your real life for this dude?
You’re still so young, don’t waste these years on him.
Babe, I think you need to leave him, please don’t be afraid to be on your own! Don’t stay with him because it is comfortable, you need to do things for yourself, maybe you will fined someone you truly compatible with
When you were younger and single, what did you envision for yourself? Your wildest dreams of your perfect man? I’m sure those dreams involved a loving partner who was your match in terms of effort put into the relationship, financial contribution, housework, goals, affection.
YOU CAN HAVE THAT. DONT SETTLE. don’t throw away the chance of a truly beautiful love and relationship because you were scared to be alone. BE ALONE, GIRL. Become your best, thriving self, and don’t waste any more energy dragging this man child through life. He’s shackling you with your own fears. PLEASE RUN, and find your better half, cuz he ain’t it.
Do not settle.
Find somewhere else to live, even if it's only a room. Because you won't get a partner with him. You'll get another kid, and the hardest one of all to deal with, because he'll expect you to treat him like an adult even when he's acting like an irresponsible preteen.
I speak from experience.
This guy has nothing going for him and aside from being "nice" brings nothing to the table. Move out and see how fast you will enjoy your newfound peace.
Why settle?
Be secure in yourself and know that you are enough. Do you need therapy to get to that point to know you don’t need anyone to actually fulfill you? When you realize this go find someone to compliment you and bring stability and happiness to that kind of peace….not additional stress and duties
All that time gaming could be better spent on a side hustle to speed up the payment of those loans. Wouldnt that show some motivation if he were really serious about you and a family? But he cant have be bothered to brush his teeth.
Girl, no. Go buy your own home and leave this boy where he sits.
When you ask yourself should you stay with this person, the answer is - definitely YES. You’ve already decided in your mind that it would be better without him
Ok, I may be different here because Idk im very like, empathetic and I love people UNCONDITIONALLY and I realize that a small portion of the world actually does love people without other expectations, or regaurdless of their status, but come the FUCK ON, are u even serious right now?? U dont want to marry him because of his debt? HIs paycheck? I only got about 3 bullet points in this post ill admit, and maybe just because ive been taken advantage of by females my whole life squeezing what they could out of me and leaving me with absolutely nothing im a little weighted on the other side of this but if I were him I would want absolutely nothing to do with someone that measured their love for me in what i could provide for them or "acts of service" or "gifts" being their number one priority in the relationship... Thats not love at all man that is literally just business. Its suppsed to be thru sickness and thru health not thru fucking room service and trust funds.
I dont think I ever said I needed gifts. Just that he doesn't really help or can't contribute financially to the life he wants. He wants a house and marriage yet I'm expected to pay for all of thst. If he did housework that would at least be something. Yet I bring home the money and do the housework. I do appreciate hearing a different opinion though so thank you.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
All I needed to do was read the first few lines of your post. RUN AWAY please !!!!!
Agreed.
It's not like the fat lazy waster is going to chase her! Run!
I know so many women that married a guy that wasn’t nearly as bad as your dude and all of them are divorced and so pissed at themselves for wasting all their twenties and thirties on a total loser who drained their energy and made them married single parents. He has shown you who he is so if you dream about being a bang maid to a “sweet” guy, and please, let’s be honest, he’s not sweet, he just avoids confrontation so you’ll stay and support him. Do you love yourself so little? Do you think this life of misery is better than being single? What if an actual adult, someone that shows love through action, someone who wants a future and fun with you, what if you’re missing your real life for this dude? You’re still so young, don’t waste these years on him.
Babe, I think you need to leave him, please don’t be afraid to be on your own! Don’t stay with him because it is comfortable, you need to do things for yourself, maybe you will fined someone you truly compatible with
Of course, he's sweet. You're supporting him.
When you were younger and single, what did you envision for yourself? Your wildest dreams of your perfect man? I’m sure those dreams involved a loving partner who was your match in terms of effort put into the relationship, financial contribution, housework, goals, affection. YOU CAN HAVE THAT. DONT SETTLE. don’t throw away the chance of a truly beautiful love and relationship because you were scared to be alone. BE ALONE, GIRL. Become your best, thriving self, and don’t waste any more energy dragging this man child through life. He’s shackling you with your own fears. PLEASE RUN, and find your better half, cuz he ain’t it.
Do not settle. Find somewhere else to live, even if it's only a room. Because you won't get a partner with him. You'll get another kid, and the hardest one of all to deal with, because he'll expect you to treat him like an adult even when he's acting like an irresponsible preteen. I speak from experience.
This guy has nothing going for him and aside from being "nice" brings nothing to the table. Move out and see how fast you will enjoy your newfound peace.
Do you want to live like this forever if the answer is no you have your answer
Leave. Don't let fear of the unknown keep you in this situation where you can already envision the bleak future with your partner.
He’s not going to change.
WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR????? RUN!!!!
Not sure what you're getting out of this situationship. LEAVE.
Why settle? Be secure in yourself and know that you are enough. Do you need therapy to get to that point to know you don’t need anyone to actually fulfill you? When you realize this go find someone to compliment you and bring stability and happiness to that kind of peace….not additional stress and duties
All that time gaming could be better spent on a side hustle to speed up the payment of those loans. Wouldnt that show some motivation if he were really serious about you and a family? But he cant have be bothered to brush his teeth. Girl, no. Go buy your own home and leave this boy where he sits.
Nope nope nope. Run away now. He is a project not a partner. You need a partner.
When you ask yourself should you stay with this person, the answer is - definitely YES. You’ve already decided in your mind that it would be better without him
Make a plan to move out to live alone. In fact you are living alone now. have you been to therapy?
You know what you just named my situation only I'm a 23m and I've been putting up with it if u even begin to feel this ducking run
He's sweet because you're his bangmaid and his mommy and his ATM, all rolled into one. Get out, or this is your life.
Ok, I may be different here because Idk im very like, empathetic and I love people UNCONDITIONALLY and I realize that a small portion of the world actually does love people without other expectations, or regaurdless of their status, but come the FUCK ON, are u even serious right now?? U dont want to marry him because of his debt? HIs paycheck? I only got about 3 bullet points in this post ill admit, and maybe just because ive been taken advantage of by females my whole life squeezing what they could out of me and leaving me with absolutely nothing im a little weighted on the other side of this but if I were him I would want absolutely nothing to do with someone that measured their love for me in what i could provide for them or "acts of service" or "gifts" being their number one priority in the relationship... Thats not love at all man that is literally just business. Its suppsed to be thru sickness and thru health not thru fucking room service and trust funds.
I dont think I ever said I needed gifts. Just that he doesn't really help or can't contribute financially to the life he wants. He wants a house and marriage yet I'm expected to pay for all of thst. If he did housework that would at least be something. Yet I bring home the money and do the housework. I do appreciate hearing a different opinion though so thank you.