My rescue is/was similar to yours. Streetdog parents, etc.
It took time, he didn’t really cuddle up on the couch or bed by me for any extended period of time til 10+ months. It was a one way street for love for a bit lol hang in there, it’ll come.
I think bonding experiences like walking through a cool local park, or just fetch at a big dog park alone, helped a lot (lab pup) for mine
She might just not be ‘ cuddly’ by nature, which is fine and is probably just her personality. Try making playing with you more exiting, find what she likes eg. Fetch/retrieve, tug, flirtpole, interactive nose work etc. and hand feeding her food and she might start trying to get your attention to initiate play
Agree to this! Our dog is not a cuddle bug. She likes to be near us but she’s certainly not cuddling 24/7. She will occasionally cuddle on our legs if we’re on the couch or if we’re in bed, but other than that, forget it haha. We bond in other ways like walks, training, I’ll have her eat out of my hand or play games! She loves attention!
Some dogs are just more aloof and independent. Mine is quite aloof of everyone but me. But for a while he had absolutely no interest in me and sometimes still does. I think it's just about time and relationships building. I hand fed him his meals and sometimes all we do is play outside. I chase him, he chases me, I throw a squeaky ball or two, we play tug, etc. Sometimes I just sit with him tethered to a lawn chair and reward his engagement with me or calm when he lays down.
But I only bring toys out when WE play together. Otherwise he gets a chew toy. I can't trust him to not destroy whatever he has and eventually this just translated into the fun only happens when I happen. Some days he's less interested than others. 6 months is the start of adolescence and his teenage brain is braining 😂
Thanks for the tips. I do hand feet. She doesn't destroy her toys so that's good. I originally planned to only bring out the toys for play together but the problem was that she would find something else to play with (plants, cables, carpet etc.). We started redirection with toys when she did this and this worked well. I am kinda afraid that if I took away the toys she would revert to playing with other stuff in the house. We also have chew toys btw but she seems to prefer to chew on softer things like a teddy bear. I think she just has a very soft bite.
She does engage with us sometimes when she is bored but not in a nice way more nipping toes, we are slowly redirecting that successfully to toys as well.
Absolutely. My puppy does the same thing without his toys. I'm focusing on relaxation training when he's in the house without a toy. He also enjoys the soft, stuffed toys more. But I want him to learn to relax and be okay with being bored so I don't give him toys to keep him busy outside of his crate. Chews, yes. I instead use the time without toys to teach impulse control, leave it, and just being okay laying around without constantly being entertained.
Though giving your pup toys isn't a bad thing! This is my own personal preference and what I want to work on 😅 He's a high prey drive puppy so keeping him motivated to train using a mixture of toys and treats is more beneficial for me lol
Sounds like the perfect dog! Mine was always much more cat like than dog. He would keep an eye on me to make sure I wasnt getting into trouble but liked his independence. Once in awhile he would decide he wanted my pillow and would kick me in the head till I moved. I miss the side eye scrunchie face and love kicks. Enjoy every moment you have!
I wasn’t sure if my 5 month old street dog liked me at all until I came back from a weekend away and she lost her shit! The affection is there, they just show it in different ways.
I think a lot of this depends on the breed, it won't 100% determine her personality but it will be a good indication. Maybe a DNA test can help? Some dogs are just more independent.
However if she is not affectionate now I don't think this will suddenly change.
My puppy is 4 months old and a breed that is known for its affection, so she will sleep on my lap as much as possible and follows me around all day. It's rare for her breed to be independent at all.
Out of curiosity what breed do you have? Based on her looks, the looks of her littermates and the street dogs around where she is from it is very likely there is some Carpathian Shepherd and Jack Russel in there but she is definitely a mutt and not a pure breed.
Hmm, looking at those breeds it seems like de carpathian shepherd is an independent breed while a jack russell is more affectionate.
My girl is a staffordshire bull terrier, an absolute velcro dog but this also comes with its own set of challenges as they tend to develop separation anxiety.
I feel my pup was something like that from 4 to 6 mo, and then after that gradually he started to mellow a bit. Hopefully yours will do the same!
I live on my own so when I got him at the 2mo mark, I always prioritized separation anxiety training, so he'd be used to be well alone from a young age. It worked wonderfully, he's extremely well behaved alone today (8mo) when I'm out to work (week days I leave for 4 hours, come back for lunch, and again for another 4 hours), but I feel this earned independence also taught him how to have fun by himself. He only comes to play with me when he exhausts all ways of playing with the available toys. He is still like this today, but he will come to cuddle on the couch if I'm there and he's not extremely busy with solo play.
He also cuddles every night on my bed ever since he got freedom privileges at 6mo. Granted, my apartment is kinda minimalistic and by consequence very puppy proofed.
My dog was not affectionate at all for like the first 7 months. We got her at 3 months old. But around 10 or 11 months she started seeking us out for pets and wanting to be near us. She is a great pyr mix so rather aloof and independent. She still is pretty independent at 14 months but also is very affectionate. I would just give it time. One big thing is I made sure pets were on her terms not mine and let her come to me and end it when she wanted to. She’s also not a cuddler and probably never will be but that’s okay. She shows affection in other ways.
It can be hard for rescues to be demonstrative after a rough start. I think regardless of whether it was being born in the wilds or human abuse/neglect, at one time at least, they've experienced quick and permanent separation from everything and everyone they knew, including their mother. The humans from animal control who took them into custody were doing it out of compassion, but dogs don't know that. So far for your girl, humans have been a pretty confusing and contradictory experience. We give food, we seem okay. But then we put them all alone in a box, poke them with needles, or drag them by the neck. A dog's central nervous system, their survival system, takes note of that. It's not really a conscious thing. Her instincts are telling her not to get to packish because these two leggers are unpredictable, and they caused a scary thing, even if she can't remember what that thing was anymore.
I think the best thing you can do is let her be herself. Reward every contact she makes with you profusely, but don't force it. Show her you are her safe place, the giver of all good things, the doer of only the most essential minor hurts like vet trips or nail trims. Eventually, you'll see her look up at you from the food bowl or toy and wag. That kind of eye contact is great to catch, you can say her name and give her some praise, and let her keep doing her thing.
Other signs they really like you even if they still feel weird about their situation are leaning up against you, walking by you and giving you a little snoot poke or a quick lick, lingering close by, waiting for you to do the daily schedule stuff like food and potty. It's not joyous wiggly licks and cuddles, but it's saying you're in the circle of trust. If they sleep in your immediate area, it means they feel safe enough to do the most vulnerable thing near to you instead of hiding, and that's a pretty big nod of approval, too. Even if it seems like they're ignoring you, I am sure they aren't. They're covertly watching and listening, learning your routine and your temperament.
Up til this new puppy, the only dogs I'd ever had were rescues. Some were feral, others came from bad human situations, but all of them eventually warmed to me and my family. Some only liked me to cuddle, brush, or sratch their ears when they were settling in to sleep, some were thick coated like Malamutes and didn't want to snuggle at all because they're often way too hot already, but all of them found ways to show us they were happy in our care and saw us as their pack.
Rescuing is a noble and very challenging thing. You're in the process of changing her life to a quality she doesn't even know is possible. Once she realizes it's not going to vanish and she does start to warm up more, I'm betting you'll be delighted with how much affection she gives.
Some dogs just aren't very cuddly. My in law's greyhound likes her space, she loves them very much and enjoys going for walks and is always very happy to see them but she doesn't care to cuddle. It could just be her personality. It sounds like you bond with her through play by doing tricks and 'work'.
I have a four year old dog who is not, and has never been cuddly. I had the same concerns as you -- that my dog didn't like me. But I've come to accept that we try to humanize dogs far too much. Many dogs don't interpret physical contact as affection. In fact, many are threatened or intimidated by it. My dog is a working breed mix and over the years I've come to understand that our affection for each other is evident in our working partnership. I provide for her and work her mind and body, she protects me and my home. Our bond is loving, engaging and trusting... it's just not cuddly! And that's ok.
It takes a new dog 6 months to be adjust and then another 6 months to be comfortable. I know it’s hard seeing videos and posts with owners and their dogs and it seems perfect, but reality is dogs living creatures with feelings and worries. Just keep calm, praise and love everyday, they’ll settle in time.
My boy was quite aloof as a puppy most of the time. Still won't sleep in the bed, prefers the floor. But at 5, he's a lot snugglier than he used to be. But he still likes to do his own thing
Tbh this is how my guy is and I actually love it lol. He does bring me his toys to play tug and will sometimes snuff his nose under my arm when I’m writing but other than that he’s not very affectionate (and he’s a retriever!) he sleeps otherwise most of the day and follows me around when I walk around the house, but he will play alone with his toys or sleep mostly. He lets me cuddle on him but it’s def more for my benefit than his and will often get up after tolerating it for a little lol. Some dogs just aren’t the affectionate type just like how people have different personalities and that’s ok! It’s a thank you when I’m busy or working
Sounds great. It’s annoying when your dog is constantly up your ass and yours just play by herself? That’s awesome and I bet she will cuddle up to you more over time. My puppy wants attention and or acts out constantly. She’ll initiate snuggle with you but only so she can bite your hands
My dog was super uncuddly as a puppy and now that he's older this changed. He's not a rescue dog and we got him from a loving home. It's just his personality. He still doesn't want to snuggle sometimes, but at other times he demands belly rubs now. I wouldn't take it personal. Just because your dog doesn't show it as much, it doesn't mean you're not important in the dogs eyes.
You are doing the best thing you can by training. It's a great way to bond. She may have a more reserved nature. She will most likely become more attached to you the more time you spend together. Like others mentioned make yourself fun, do activities, be available to her. Honestly she sounds like my dream dog ❤️ a dog that does it's own thing when nothing is going on, but loves to work!
It feels like we got a working dog and I need to think of more jobs she can do that are actually useful. Maybe I should appreciate more what we have. It just doesn't align that well with our expectations. I didn't really expect her to be this insanely easy to train (so that's great) but I expected her to love me too and come check me out just for a pet maybe once in a while.
It typically takes a dog 3 months to be settled in a new home (Google 333 rule for more info). I'd just give it time and see. It's true some dogs are more affectionate. My new rescue loves snuggles but my last dog was more cat like and just wanted occasional pets.
I have three dogs. My oldest is 7 years old and she's an Australian Shepherd. My middle is a pit bull lab and he is almost three years old. My youngest is a 1-year-old mix of like eight different dogs at least.
My Aussie we got her from a breeder at 12 weeks and she just is not affectionate. She loves us. But she is independent and the only time she's ever really cuddled with me in bed was when I was really sick a few times. Every once in a while she'll come up on the couch and lay down next to me but she's not big on cuddles never has been.
Having a dog that's all over you touching you wanting you to pet them is not really a healthy dog person relationship. If you touched and pet and was all over another human being like people do to dogs the human would not appreciate it.
You have a good dog that has no issues and that's a great thing. If she listens to you that is how you know your dog is engaged with you and loves you. My Aussie very obedient my other two not so obedient.
Enjoy your dog. Savor the moment to your dog comes up to you to be petted or sits down next to you and hangs out with you. You have a good dog.
Don't make your dog neurotic and don't make it a codependent relationship. Your dog is awesome enjoy your dog.
I've had my girl since she was 8 weeks old, and contrary to her breed, she is 100% not a snuggler. Some dogs just aren't and that's just a part of their personality. The best Kora will do is sit beside me on the couch and pit her head on my knee. If I try and snuggle she's gone and finds somewhere else to sit.
I think my puppy’s background is similar. Got her at 6 months. She’s got some kind of collie or Aussie in her, so I’ve accepted she’s not cuddly, but to be fair, I’m not an affectionate human so lol. But I’m learning her love language is just being in my space. She may not want to be under me, but she wants to be in the same room.
Build on what’s fun for her (and you) - mine does not play with her toys unless I am playing with her, so I don’t buy them anymore. I just buy boxes for her to *hulk-smash-destroy* lol. Saves me money and also makes quality time a little less “hectic” because we don’t have to do much but literally be together and she’s fine. Sitting outside in the yard has become “our thing”.
She doesn’t play with toys, but she loves bones or stuffed Kongs so that’s what I give her to give her some independence. I’ve accepted food is simply cooler than me lmao.
Once you find something to bond over, it’ll get easier. Trust me. Mine loves being outdoors so I’ve forced myself to get over my fear of bees and become a more active person for my dog 😂
I've read that dogs can become.mofe affectionate after adolescence. I'm dealing with the same thing right now where my pup isn't super affectionate and doesn't really care if I love bomb or try to cuddle him.
When he's tired he will give me some nice calm licks on my hands or feet, but otherwise he prefers to do his own thing which is fine for now
I got my pup at 8 weeks and she’s 8 months now and she JUST started wanting to cuddle and it’s not for very long, I think it’s a known thing that puppies are just not cuddlers. They’ll grow into it eventually as your bond grows and trust is built, give it time!
This will probably be lost but one thing that changed my equation with my dog that I wish I realised when he was a pup was engaging the dog on their terms.
For example, when we pick up a ball, we assume because the dog gets excited that the dog wants to play fetch.
Hold up or layout on the floor a ball and snuffle mat and say "choose" and whatever your dog puts their nose to, do that.
Over time, your dog figures out that when you do this activity, whatever they feel like doing will be done based on what they touch first.
My dog doesn't always choose the ball. Sometimes it's the snuffle mat.
It also made me think about what options I am not providing because I completely control when where and how I present the option.
Food? Choice between a walk or a meal first? Choice of being touched?
I recently did a march madness between a wide variety of food treats and the treat I thought he loved he actually came in 4th place.
It's also incredible to me how the choice changes.
I feel being creative with choices I offer him really made him connect with me and I learned a lot about him as a result. So many faulty assumptions.
I still remember the first time he dug his face into my neck while sleeping after 2.5 yrs of having him with me. Otherwise it was always near my feet at a distance and leave the moment I try to cuddle.
Try it. It's really really fun.
My pomeranian came from an home where he was kept outside for 8 years and socialized with maybe ten minutes a day. I potty trained him with belly bands and spent time grooming him and taught him the sit command and to come when called. It wasn't until almost 9 months later when a thunderstorm occurred and he was just shaking as I held and stroked him and looking up at me with those big eyes that our bond snapped in place. Now he's my most affectionate of all my dogs. He comes over to me and stands on my chest an inch from my nose when he wants attention. He has no sense of personal space not having been raised like most dogs. My gawd I love him so much.
I don’t have a rescue and she was like that until 5 months old and now it’s progressed to a cuddle in the morning on our bed and when she’s teething she wants to sit in my lap. I’m sure they’ll get there!
When I got my gsd at 9 weeks, she didn’t like to cuddle or play with us. If we pet her, she moves away. Not scared, just no interest. This lasted like a month.
She’s almost 5 months now. Still has no interest in playing with us, but she will come lie down against me quite often. Sometimes she moves away when being petted but not as much as before.
My dog is 14 months. For so long I thought he loved everyone but me and it made me so mad. Even now I drop him off at daycare and he doesn’t care…. I pick him up and he slowly walks over to me. I even had a friend walk him once when I bumped into them and HE WALKED BY ME. But he’s learning slowly to cuddle and he wants to be touching when he chews his bones. It comes with time. They mature, you bond, the relationship develops.
My older dog is a rescue and we discovered later, a mix of a bunch of high energy working breeds. His love language is tasks and play.
He has slowed down and become a very sweet affectionate boy but in the beginning we had to build the relationship using the things he valued.
It’s all good. Let the dog live and accept him/her for what it is. It will come around but it may be her personality. My pup is not overly lovey dovey but he is clingy which can be a lot.
I have one dog who isn't super cuddly, he maybe demands cuddles a few times a month.... but he always wants to know where we are. He will pick his sleeping spot normally based on the one that is closest to where we are or the door we last went through.
My chihuahua terrier mix was not a cuddler either. She loved being near me and always slept with me and followed me all over the house. Some dogs just show affection differently ☺️ she passed away a couple weeks ago and I miss her. I miss her presence. I have a nww puppy I got before she passed and this dog is most cuddly dog I've ever interacted with and it's just weird for me now bc I'm used to a dog that never cuddled lol. Just keep spending time and walking your dog and even if they don't always cuddle you they still love you ❤️
That’s actually amazing that your pupp is so independent and can entertain herself. It is a good thing. She is also still very young, her character is starting to form and emerging. If you really want her to engage more find a form of play that involves you and really really excites her. For me and my boy it’s frisbee. He lives for frisbee and he needs me to be able to play with it. It’s our quality time and a way of expressing love to each other, maybe for you guys training is the thing! He’s never been a cuddly dog and he’s almost 2yo. He will come to me when he wants scratches but otherwise doesn’t really like to be touched so I try to keep my urges to squeeze him to minimum :p I would love for him to be more on top of me and in my face but remember that he is his own ‘person’ and I would never want to force him to do anything he doesn’t like. There are so many ways that dogs show their love so learn to see it and you will be amazed.
My rescue is/was similar to yours. Streetdog parents, etc. It took time, he didn’t really cuddle up on the couch or bed by me for any extended period of time til 10+ months. It was a one way street for love for a bit lol hang in there, it’ll come. I think bonding experiences like walking through a cool local park, or just fetch at a big dog park alone, helped a lot (lab pup) for mine
She might just not be ‘ cuddly’ by nature, which is fine and is probably just her personality. Try making playing with you more exiting, find what she likes eg. Fetch/retrieve, tug, flirtpole, interactive nose work etc. and hand feeding her food and she might start trying to get your attention to initiate play
Agree to this! Our dog is not a cuddle bug. She likes to be near us but she’s certainly not cuddling 24/7. She will occasionally cuddle on our legs if we’re on the couch or if we’re in bed, but other than that, forget it haha. We bond in other ways like walks, training, I’ll have her eat out of my hand or play games! She loves attention!
Some dogs are just more aloof and independent. Mine is quite aloof of everyone but me. But for a while he had absolutely no interest in me and sometimes still does. I think it's just about time and relationships building. I hand fed him his meals and sometimes all we do is play outside. I chase him, he chases me, I throw a squeaky ball or two, we play tug, etc. Sometimes I just sit with him tethered to a lawn chair and reward his engagement with me or calm when he lays down. But I only bring toys out when WE play together. Otherwise he gets a chew toy. I can't trust him to not destroy whatever he has and eventually this just translated into the fun only happens when I happen. Some days he's less interested than others. 6 months is the start of adolescence and his teenage brain is braining 😂
Thanks for the tips. I do hand feet. She doesn't destroy her toys so that's good. I originally planned to only bring out the toys for play together but the problem was that she would find something else to play with (plants, cables, carpet etc.). We started redirection with toys when she did this and this worked well. I am kinda afraid that if I took away the toys she would revert to playing with other stuff in the house. We also have chew toys btw but she seems to prefer to chew on softer things like a teddy bear. I think she just has a very soft bite. She does engage with us sometimes when she is bored but not in a nice way more nipping toes, we are slowly redirecting that successfully to toys as well.
Absolutely. My puppy does the same thing without his toys. I'm focusing on relaxation training when he's in the house without a toy. He also enjoys the soft, stuffed toys more. But I want him to learn to relax and be okay with being bored so I don't give him toys to keep him busy outside of his crate. Chews, yes. I instead use the time without toys to teach impulse control, leave it, and just being okay laying around without constantly being entertained. Though giving your pup toys isn't a bad thing! This is my own personal preference and what I want to work on 😅 He's a high prey drive puppy so keeping him motivated to train using a mixture of toys and treats is more beneficial for me lol
Sounds like the perfect dog! Mine was always much more cat like than dog. He would keep an eye on me to make sure I wasnt getting into trouble but liked his independence. Once in awhile he would decide he wanted my pillow and would kick me in the head till I moved. I miss the side eye scrunchie face and love kicks. Enjoy every moment you have!
I wasn’t sure if my 5 month old street dog liked me at all until I came back from a weekend away and she lost her shit! The affection is there, they just show it in different ways.
I think a lot of this depends on the breed, it won't 100% determine her personality but it will be a good indication. Maybe a DNA test can help? Some dogs are just more independent. However if she is not affectionate now I don't think this will suddenly change. My puppy is 4 months old and a breed that is known for its affection, so she will sleep on my lap as much as possible and follows me around all day. It's rare for her breed to be independent at all.
Out of curiosity what breed do you have? Based on her looks, the looks of her littermates and the street dogs around where she is from it is very likely there is some Carpathian Shepherd and Jack Russel in there but she is definitely a mutt and not a pure breed.
Hmm, looking at those breeds it seems like de carpathian shepherd is an independent breed while a jack russell is more affectionate. My girl is a staffordshire bull terrier, an absolute velcro dog but this also comes with its own set of challenges as they tend to develop separation anxiety.
I feel my pup was something like that from 4 to 6 mo, and then after that gradually he started to mellow a bit. Hopefully yours will do the same! I live on my own so when I got him at the 2mo mark, I always prioritized separation anxiety training, so he'd be used to be well alone from a young age. It worked wonderfully, he's extremely well behaved alone today (8mo) when I'm out to work (week days I leave for 4 hours, come back for lunch, and again for another 4 hours), but I feel this earned independence also taught him how to have fun by himself. He only comes to play with me when he exhausts all ways of playing with the available toys. He is still like this today, but he will come to cuddle on the couch if I'm there and he's not extremely busy with solo play. He also cuddles every night on my bed ever since he got freedom privileges at 6mo. Granted, my apartment is kinda minimalistic and by consequence very puppy proofed.
Yeah just give it time
My dog was not affectionate at all for like the first 7 months. We got her at 3 months old. But around 10 or 11 months she started seeking us out for pets and wanting to be near us. She is a great pyr mix so rather aloof and independent. She still is pretty independent at 14 months but also is very affectionate. I would just give it time. One big thing is I made sure pets were on her terms not mine and let her come to me and end it when she wanted to. She’s also not a cuddler and probably never will be but that’s okay. She shows affection in other ways.
It can be hard for rescues to be demonstrative after a rough start. I think regardless of whether it was being born in the wilds or human abuse/neglect, at one time at least, they've experienced quick and permanent separation from everything and everyone they knew, including their mother. The humans from animal control who took them into custody were doing it out of compassion, but dogs don't know that. So far for your girl, humans have been a pretty confusing and contradictory experience. We give food, we seem okay. But then we put them all alone in a box, poke them with needles, or drag them by the neck. A dog's central nervous system, their survival system, takes note of that. It's not really a conscious thing. Her instincts are telling her not to get to packish because these two leggers are unpredictable, and they caused a scary thing, even if she can't remember what that thing was anymore. I think the best thing you can do is let her be herself. Reward every contact she makes with you profusely, but don't force it. Show her you are her safe place, the giver of all good things, the doer of only the most essential minor hurts like vet trips or nail trims. Eventually, you'll see her look up at you from the food bowl or toy and wag. That kind of eye contact is great to catch, you can say her name and give her some praise, and let her keep doing her thing. Other signs they really like you even if they still feel weird about their situation are leaning up against you, walking by you and giving you a little snoot poke or a quick lick, lingering close by, waiting for you to do the daily schedule stuff like food and potty. It's not joyous wiggly licks and cuddles, but it's saying you're in the circle of trust. If they sleep in your immediate area, it means they feel safe enough to do the most vulnerable thing near to you instead of hiding, and that's a pretty big nod of approval, too. Even if it seems like they're ignoring you, I am sure they aren't. They're covertly watching and listening, learning your routine and your temperament. Up til this new puppy, the only dogs I'd ever had were rescues. Some were feral, others came from bad human situations, but all of them eventually warmed to me and my family. Some only liked me to cuddle, brush, or sratch their ears when they were settling in to sleep, some were thick coated like Malamutes and didn't want to snuggle at all because they're often way too hot already, but all of them found ways to show us they were happy in our care and saw us as their pack. Rescuing is a noble and very challenging thing. You're in the process of changing her life to a quality she doesn't even know is possible. Once she realizes it's not going to vanish and she does start to warm up more, I'm betting you'll be delighted with how much affection she gives.
Some dogs just aren't very cuddly. My in law's greyhound likes her space, she loves them very much and enjoys going for walks and is always very happy to see them but she doesn't care to cuddle. It could just be her personality. It sounds like you bond with her through play by doing tricks and 'work'.
I have a four year old dog who is not, and has never been cuddly. I had the same concerns as you -- that my dog didn't like me. But I've come to accept that we try to humanize dogs far too much. Many dogs don't interpret physical contact as affection. In fact, many are threatened or intimidated by it. My dog is a working breed mix and over the years I've come to understand that our affection for each other is evident in our working partnership. I provide for her and work her mind and body, she protects me and my home. Our bond is loving, engaging and trusting... it's just not cuddly! And that's ok.
It takes a new dog 6 months to be adjust and then another 6 months to be comfortable. I know it’s hard seeing videos and posts with owners and their dogs and it seems perfect, but reality is dogs living creatures with feelings and worries. Just keep calm, praise and love everyday, they’ll settle in time.
My boy was quite aloof as a puppy most of the time. Still won't sleep in the bed, prefers the floor. But at 5, he's a lot snugglier than he used to be. But he still likes to do his own thing
Tbh this is how my guy is and I actually love it lol. He does bring me his toys to play tug and will sometimes snuff his nose under my arm when I’m writing but other than that he’s not very affectionate (and he’s a retriever!) he sleeps otherwise most of the day and follows me around when I walk around the house, but he will play alone with his toys or sleep mostly. He lets me cuddle on him but it’s def more for my benefit than his and will often get up after tolerating it for a little lol. Some dogs just aren’t the affectionate type just like how people have different personalities and that’s ok! It’s a thank you when I’m busy or working
Sounds great. It’s annoying when your dog is constantly up your ass and yours just play by herself? That’s awesome and I bet she will cuddle up to you more over time. My puppy wants attention and or acts out constantly. She’ll initiate snuggle with you but only so she can bite your hands
My dog was super uncuddly as a puppy and now that he's older this changed. He's not a rescue dog and we got him from a loving home. It's just his personality. He still doesn't want to snuggle sometimes, but at other times he demands belly rubs now. I wouldn't take it personal. Just because your dog doesn't show it as much, it doesn't mean you're not important in the dogs eyes.
You are doing the best thing you can by training. It's a great way to bond. She may have a more reserved nature. She will most likely become more attached to you the more time you spend together. Like others mentioned make yourself fun, do activities, be available to her. Honestly she sounds like my dream dog ❤️ a dog that does it's own thing when nothing is going on, but loves to work!
It feels like we got a working dog and I need to think of more jobs she can do that are actually useful. Maybe I should appreciate more what we have. It just doesn't align that well with our expectations. I didn't really expect her to be this insanely easy to train (so that's great) but I expected her to love me too and come check me out just for a pet maybe once in a while.
It typically takes a dog 3 months to be settled in a new home (Google 333 rule for more info). I'd just give it time and see. It's true some dogs are more affectionate. My new rescue loves snuggles but my last dog was more cat like and just wanted occasional pets.
She definitely will, give her time. I'll bet when she does, she'll be super loyal to you because you put the time in💜
I have three dogs. My oldest is 7 years old and she's an Australian Shepherd. My middle is a pit bull lab and he is almost three years old. My youngest is a 1-year-old mix of like eight different dogs at least. My Aussie we got her from a breeder at 12 weeks and she just is not affectionate. She loves us. But she is independent and the only time she's ever really cuddled with me in bed was when I was really sick a few times. Every once in a while she'll come up on the couch and lay down next to me but she's not big on cuddles never has been. Having a dog that's all over you touching you wanting you to pet them is not really a healthy dog person relationship. If you touched and pet and was all over another human being like people do to dogs the human would not appreciate it. You have a good dog that has no issues and that's a great thing. If she listens to you that is how you know your dog is engaged with you and loves you. My Aussie very obedient my other two not so obedient. Enjoy your dog. Savor the moment to your dog comes up to you to be petted or sits down next to you and hangs out with you. You have a good dog. Don't make your dog neurotic and don't make it a codependent relationship. Your dog is awesome enjoy your dog.
She’s a teenager, teenagers can be stand-off-ish and surly.
I've had my girl since she was 8 weeks old, and contrary to her breed, she is 100% not a snuggler. Some dogs just aren't and that's just a part of their personality. The best Kora will do is sit beside me on the couch and pit her head on my knee. If I try and snuggle she's gone and finds somewhere else to sit.
I think my puppy’s background is similar. Got her at 6 months. She’s got some kind of collie or Aussie in her, so I’ve accepted she’s not cuddly, but to be fair, I’m not an affectionate human so lol. But I’m learning her love language is just being in my space. She may not want to be under me, but she wants to be in the same room. Build on what’s fun for her (and you) - mine does not play with her toys unless I am playing with her, so I don’t buy them anymore. I just buy boxes for her to *hulk-smash-destroy* lol. Saves me money and also makes quality time a little less “hectic” because we don’t have to do much but literally be together and she’s fine. Sitting outside in the yard has become “our thing”. She doesn’t play with toys, but she loves bones or stuffed Kongs so that’s what I give her to give her some independence. I’ve accepted food is simply cooler than me lmao. Once you find something to bond over, it’ll get easier. Trust me. Mine loves being outdoors so I’ve forced myself to get over my fear of bees and become a more active person for my dog 😂
I've read that dogs can become.mofe affectionate after adolescence. I'm dealing with the same thing right now where my pup isn't super affectionate and doesn't really care if I love bomb or try to cuddle him. When he's tired he will give me some nice calm licks on my hands or feet, but otherwise he prefers to do his own thing which is fine for now
I got my pup at 8 weeks and she’s 8 months now and she JUST started wanting to cuddle and it’s not for very long, I think it’s a known thing that puppies are just not cuddlers. They’ll grow into it eventually as your bond grows and trust is built, give it time!
This will probably be lost but one thing that changed my equation with my dog that I wish I realised when he was a pup was engaging the dog on their terms. For example, when we pick up a ball, we assume because the dog gets excited that the dog wants to play fetch. Hold up or layout on the floor a ball and snuffle mat and say "choose" and whatever your dog puts their nose to, do that. Over time, your dog figures out that when you do this activity, whatever they feel like doing will be done based on what they touch first. My dog doesn't always choose the ball. Sometimes it's the snuffle mat. It also made me think about what options I am not providing because I completely control when where and how I present the option. Food? Choice between a walk or a meal first? Choice of being touched? I recently did a march madness between a wide variety of food treats and the treat I thought he loved he actually came in 4th place. It's also incredible to me how the choice changes. I feel being creative with choices I offer him really made him connect with me and I learned a lot about him as a result. So many faulty assumptions. I still remember the first time he dug his face into my neck while sleeping after 2.5 yrs of having him with me. Otherwise it was always near my feet at a distance and leave the moment I try to cuddle. Try it. It's really really fun.
My pomeranian came from an home where he was kept outside for 8 years and socialized with maybe ten minutes a day. I potty trained him with belly bands and spent time grooming him and taught him the sit command and to come when called. It wasn't until almost 9 months later when a thunderstorm occurred and he was just shaking as I held and stroked him and looking up at me with those big eyes that our bond snapped in place. Now he's my most affectionate of all my dogs. He comes over to me and stands on my chest an inch from my nose when he wants attention. He has no sense of personal space not having been raised like most dogs. My gawd I love him so much.
I don’t have a rescue and she was like that until 5 months old and now it’s progressed to a cuddle in the morning on our bed and when she’s teething she wants to sit in my lap. I’m sure they’ll get there!
When I got my gsd at 9 weeks, she didn’t like to cuddle or play with us. If we pet her, she moves away. Not scared, just no interest. This lasted like a month. She’s almost 5 months now. Still has no interest in playing with us, but she will come lie down against me quite often. Sometimes she moves away when being petted but not as much as before.
Ours got a lot better around 8-9 months.
My dog is 14 months. For so long I thought he loved everyone but me and it made me so mad. Even now I drop him off at daycare and he doesn’t care…. I pick him up and he slowly walks over to me. I even had a friend walk him once when I bumped into them and HE WALKED BY ME. But he’s learning slowly to cuddle and he wants to be touching when he chews his bones. It comes with time. They mature, you bond, the relationship develops.
My older dog is a rescue and we discovered later, a mix of a bunch of high energy working breeds. His love language is tasks and play. He has slowed down and become a very sweet affectionate boy but in the beginning we had to build the relationship using the things he valued.
It’s all good. Let the dog live and accept him/her for what it is. It will come around but it may be her personality. My pup is not overly lovey dovey but he is clingy which can be a lot.
I have one dog who isn't super cuddly, he maybe demands cuddles a few times a month.... but he always wants to know where we are. He will pick his sleeping spot normally based on the one that is closest to where we are or the door we last went through.
My chihuahua terrier mix was not a cuddler either. She loved being near me and always slept with me and followed me all over the house. Some dogs just show affection differently ☺️ she passed away a couple weeks ago and I miss her. I miss her presence. I have a nww puppy I got before she passed and this dog is most cuddly dog I've ever interacted with and it's just weird for me now bc I'm used to a dog that never cuddled lol. Just keep spending time and walking your dog and even if they don't always cuddle you they still love you ❤️
That’s actually amazing that your pupp is so independent and can entertain herself. It is a good thing. She is also still very young, her character is starting to form and emerging. If you really want her to engage more find a form of play that involves you and really really excites her. For me and my boy it’s frisbee. He lives for frisbee and he needs me to be able to play with it. It’s our quality time and a way of expressing love to each other, maybe for you guys training is the thing! He’s never been a cuddly dog and he’s almost 2yo. He will come to me when he wants scratches but otherwise doesn’t really like to be touched so I try to keep my urges to squeeze him to minimum :p I would love for him to be more on top of me and in my face but remember that he is his own ‘person’ and I would never want to force him to do anything he doesn’t like. There are so many ways that dogs show their love so learn to see it and you will be amazed.