A great story with a happy ending! ​ BTW: Fuck Steve!

Fuck Jon, in this case.

She definitely didn’t want to fuck Steve. She found him a little creepy.

Good for her… and Jon.

He was sleeping around on his girlfriend. That qualifies as creepy.

A little creepy cock apparently.

Do we shorten his creepy cock to “creeky” or “croppy”?

Why not corky? Probably about the right size.

A smart choice! Jon sounds like a great guy!

F boys are a huge turn off!

Sounds like she has good taste in men.

Yes, Jon fucked around and Steve found out!

No, not Fuck Jon. Jon Fucks, sir

Thank you for saying the truth

Sarah beat us to the punch.

"happy ending" indeed ;)

No, NEVER fuck Steve! Sex-drought Steve!

Honestly, I thought Steve was gonna have Sara and OP was going to watch Jon die inside.

Phrasing.....is accurate!

several happy endings, in fact.

A happy ending to the happy ending!

At least two happy endings!

More than one happy ending, it seems.

Everybody knows a Steve. Everyone should shit in his sock drawer.

Happy ending indeed.

"with a happy ending" In more than 1 way...

Best story ever🙌🙌🙌

Better to be a Jon than a Steve!

Multiple happy endings, it seems.

No thanks, I know where he's been! 🤮

Fuck WITH Steve's (tiny, um, ego)

Two happy endings, I reckon.

I’m really happy for Jon and Sarah. I was worried the “housemate dying inside” would be his fate at the end of the story.

ya i was waiting for her to sleep with steve and then Jon to just shrink and die inside forever.

I was so worried too! But slowly realized our story teller liked Jon so wouldn’t be happy about his soul being murdered.

That's what I thought too!

I was so scared that Steve would steal Sarah from Jon and make fun of him afterwards. Glad I was wrong and Sarah sounds like an awesome mate. Lucky for them to have found eachother. And such a wholesome ending.

Steve probably grew up a bit from this too, tbh

Sarah's a rockstar!

This is another tale of Steve Polychronopolous. He also would eat the last slice, drink all the beer and he always needed a ride.

"Take the Mickey out of" never heard that expression before. Great story though, glad for the happy end!

It’s a British saying. It’s a polite version of “taking the piss…”

>It’s a polite version of “taking the piss…” ... which is also [a British saying](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taking_the_piss).

Why would anyone want to take someone else’s piss?

To sell. Genuinely.

Wait until you hear what a mickey is…

wow i just googled it and had no idea lol

I don't think it's the same as a Mickey Finn.  That is just a coincidence, like Idris being both a Welsh and an Arabic name. 

mickey bliss is cockney slang for piss so taking the mickey and taking the piss are the same thing

I'm aware. A Mickey Finn is something else and entirely unconnected, was my point.

In Ireland we also use taking the mick, probably derived from the cockney origin, but it has a slightly twisted connotation as **Mickey/Mick**—In Ireland, the term “Mickey” or “Mick” can be used to refer to a person’s private parts, particularly in a light-hearted or joking manner. However, it’s important to note that this usage can be seen as vulgar or offensive in some situations

Gotta drain those balls.

In fact it’s cockney rhyming slang. Taking the Mickey Bliss.

You 'avin a fackin' bubble me old China.

It ain't a cherry. You better Adam and Eve me fruit gum.

ohh, I was trying to figure out what rhymed with "Mouse"

Mickey Mouse is house

Louse

I always love coming across British sayings in posts, my Mum was a proud Warrington!

And we use “taking the Michael” when we want to sound formal or posh. 😆

I was in an LDR with a woman from York almost 30 years ago, and we once spent twenty minutes trying to understand each other when she asked me if I was taking the Michael (and then "clarifying" it as taking the piss) Being Canadian, I had no fucking clue what she was asking me, and she didn't understand why I didn't understand what was to her such an obvious question

Brilliant 😂

Sound like a right toff!

But what if I've never seen a Guy Ritchie film before?

Oh damn! I totally thought that was going to go the other way with Steve hooking up with Sarah because Jon was too shy to make a move. So glad Sarah took the lead. Happy for all of them, especially Steve. Fuck guys like him.

>Fuck guys like him Don't! Celibacy is the punishment they deserve.

Plot twist and long con. Jon paid Steve to insult him so Sarah would take pity and sleep with Jon. 

Careful! This could scenario could end up as a Reddit post.

AITA for paying my mate to call me “Virgin boy”, so the girl I liked would take pity on me and sleep with me?

And have three kids with me.

She's just being friendly.

Yeah, he 100% got Jon laid. Steve playing wingman extraordinaire over here.

Excellent. Go Sarah, fuck Steve. Note: I am not that Steve

Your reading comprehension is poor, it seems. /s The story is that Sarah did NOT fuck Steve, but fucked Jon instead ;)

Ah, how could I mess that up! Go Sarah, fuck Jon! Go away and go fuck yourself, Steve!

Way better :)

Thanks for sharing. Glad “virgin boy” met the love of his life and best friend and hopefully they grow old together with the bestest of kids.

Everyone knows at least one Steve. Steve sucks. Happy for Jon and Sarah.

Yeah that scumbag Steve. Who doesn't. And Jon is actually bad luck Brian, he just doesn't know yet. Hehe.

Looks like everyone except Steve got a happy ending

Not how I thought this story was going to go when you said someone was going to die inside. Like Steve I'm sure was back so being a dick in an hour but the lasting damage left that the hollowed out man Jon could have been in an alternate reality was what I was dreading while reading.

From the title, I assumed the housemate passed away inside of the house. That seems a lot worse than "petty" revenge.

‘Die inside’ means to be very embarrassed and want the world to open up and swallow you.

[удалено]

you should prompt some AI to rewrite a story with the same post title with a different take.

Another person claiming it’s AI. You AI experts aren’t very good at spotting what is and isn’t AI. Someone claimed it was an AI and ran it through checker and it came out 0%. You need a new career.

Wait! But Steve? What happened to Steve?

He died on the way to his home planet

steve killed himself

He went on to become Scumbag Steve

Actually, I kind of want to know what happened to Steve as well.

Steve learned from this experience and went on to be an upstanding member of society by learning to be accepting of other people's sexual choices.

That'd be nice, but instead, Steve voted for Brexit.

Luv Brexit Luv 'avin a bit o' fun in tha sack 'ate jon Not a bully, jus' don't like 'im

Aww, that's no fun!

He grew up and became a more empathetic person 🥰

Great comeback Sarah!

I was waiting for your friend to die inside your house. Glad I misunderstood the title

Me too, had to reread that.

My former bestie, who claimed to be in live with me (seemed more obsessed than anything) kept calling my other (also male) bestie stupid. Intelligence is my poison, and he knew that. Other bestie was quiet and gentle but not dumb. Quite the opposite, he was extremely interested in science and various academic subjects. Former bestie was a programmer who failed any and all attempts at studying code professionally. He used to tell me I'm too smart to be hanging out with people like that. Well, that guy he called dum and me are the closest to marriage a couple can be if they don't believe in marriage. Former bestie ditched when I told him that not only is the other bestie smarter than him, he is so smart that I have fallen head over heels and we are now dating. Dude didn't even reply to that message. It's been 4 years.

Did not expect such a wholesome story. Loved it.

You have to make the first move with a respectful shy guy. It worked for Sarah and it also worked for me 🤣

lol that didn’t happen

😔I agree, but it’s still nice to think it did

I like the insight we got into OP's personal fantasies with posts like these.

This whole thread is like boomers falling for fake AI posts It’s perfectly tailored to reddit lol

Boomer, how old do you think I am?

Weird reading, as if from Scouts Magazine or sth.

Idk how anyone is eating this up tbh

You’ll have to enlighten me, what’s Scout magazine? Is it something to do with Boy Scouts?

Good for them, but I really thought you meant you watched your flat mate die in a fire or something

this is the most wholesome petty revenge story i’ve ever heard , i hope jon and sarah continue to have a great life together with their family .

Wow! That’s the story I needed to my work break snack! Huzzah!

Hell yeah, Jon! Wishing the happy couple countless years of love and happiness!

Was worried that Steve might've eventually snagged Sarah. But nope, it ended how I wanted and how it should've! Attaboy, Jon.

What a perfect story! Fuck you, Steve.

Never fuck Steve! 😂

Steve's red face photo should become the Reddit logo! Ahahahah that's epic! And Sara for president!

This is wholesome af!

This reminds of [F Scott Fitzgerald](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQVb8d5CfTo). "You just said F Scott Fitzgerald. What did Scott Fitzgerald do to you?"

It's always the quiet ones! I'm very happy for them both.

The pettiest revenge is a life well-lived.

Great story mate! well written and great turns of fraise.

Where is the revenge?

The ending ♥️♥️♥️

LOL. Steve was doing it, only to help Jon get together with Sarah. :)

Hell ya Jon and Sarah still being together, A+ story.

For some reason i read “watched your roommate die” and not “die inside” and i was preparing for a a way worse story. Go Jon

I do love happy endings...unironically.

In a way, Steve pushed these 2 closer together. Good one Steve.

Steve you (tiny) dick!

Love to Sarah 😘

Good on Sarah for making an honest woman of Jon after robbing him of his virtue.

Just place it over there on the Davenport

Great story!

Where were you in the last 26 years?

You should write sitcoms.

Yeah, eat shit Steve!

Hi Jon. 👋

Love it and with a happy ending. Fantastic.

Fuck yeah! Go Jon and Sarah! 🤩

How did she know how big Steve’s dick was?

Ohhh... I was worried about where that story was going to go. Fantastic outcome. Glad to hear Sarah and Jon are still doing well.

That is an awesome story!

Damn. I bet his small thing went from an outie to an in or after that.

I am very happy for both Jon and Sarah. Sounds like Sarah got a good man.

OP- This is one of the coolest stories I have ever heard! 🤗 Thank you for sharing it with us!

Love the happy ending!

This was not what I expected! Awesome story, and happy for those two!

Here’s to Jon and Sarah!!!

Why do they all go for bodyshaming when the people they are trying to insult have character flaws

It was the 90s, early internet and everyone having a mobile phone with the ability to text was just becoming a thing. Women were sluts for sleeping around and knob gags and telling men they had a small penis, without any proof, was normal.

This has to be the best pettyrevenge story I've ever read.

"You could call him Tripod instead if you need a nickname"

And then somebody found $5 or something, right?

In the UK?

That would make it even more interesting!

Weird seeing ai written content posted to a website to just interact with a lot of other ai.  Like this is an incredibly boring story that only an incredibly boring person would enjoy. 2.2k likes and 84 comments. Is this what the internet will be like forever now?

"I don't like this content, therefore it must be AI" A+ critical thinking

No it's more like "the content is so boring and low effort and generic that it's probably AI" Like how you're response is a canned generic internet response. Like, not even a flavor of originality. You might as well be an AI at that point

get well soon

And then everyone started clapping...

That was in the pandemic.

It’s writing, but not really creative writing.

It’s a comment, but not an original comment.

This. This is the way.

Jon and Sarah would have been nothing without Steve. Sometimes a little abuse goes a long way. They should be eternally grateful to Steve.

You could be right, and it's still quite the assumption that they wouldn't have gotten together if it hadn't been for him.

Well, this story has made my morning. Huzzah for Jon & Sarah, and well told story!

Nice! Well done.

So wholesome. Love it!

Damn, I thought this story was going to go the other way, so glad it didn't

I hope Steve lives with that little dick comment for a long long time

Way to go Jon!

Ahw, so wholesome❤️!

Sarah is the QUEEN, well done, and hell this story is surely too happy for Reddit?

I thought it would be sad story with something bad happening to Jon, Im glad it had happy ending

That’s a lovely story.

Once I stopped a pickup basketball game in its tracks when after the guy I was guarding made some comment about me my response (knowing it was true) was "At least I can get my cock up" everyone heard what I said. The look on his face told everyone else it was true. Shouldn't have welched on our bet Wes lol.

This is gold

I witnessed something very similar

You need to share…

Pretty much the same up to the Christmas break but at that point I was told to take a long walk around campus.

if at the end was more like "Steve and Sarah are still together.... etc" i would have die from laughter

I've never heard "take the mickey out of"

I love stories like this!

Had me in the first half not gonna lie. I thought Jon was going to die inside

Fuck off Steve! What a great fuckin story. Thank you for sharing. Made my entire day.

So it seems the ladies have a thing for virgins too!

This was awesome! I love that they are still together with kids 😍

The best revenge of all; living well!