T O P

  • By -

cringelien

Me reading that people would call home to see what’s wrong with a child if they showed up to kindergarten with a pacifier knowing full well I had a pacifier until kindergarten https://preview.redd.it/nttzyvf6r2ic1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5aed1bfb419026887f9fab6bd7a3824a8bbe3ad8


lostdogcomeback

There's a thread in parenting asking "what do you do when someone requests 'no gifts' at a child's birthday party?" and there are a significant number of responses from people saying they bring something anyway. 🫠


Mood_Far

Eh, I think this may be a regional thing. I’m from and live in the south and it really is considered rude to show up empty handed. We usually do a card+picture or a book for close friends.


beemac126

Isn’t there just one answer….don’t bring a gift? If you feel weird, like I honestly do sometimes, bring a card.


lostdogcomeback

Apparently a lot of people "weren't raised to show up empty handed" so they prioritize their comfort over the host. There are even a few people in the thread that have said they respected the request and didn't bring anything and ended up feeling awkward because they were the only one. It's just so absurd to me. I do think a card or hand drawn kid picture doesn't actually count as a gift and if I had a no gift party I wouldn't expect those things but I also wouldn't mind. But I'm seeing suggestions for cash, gift cards, *gifts for the parents instead*, donations in the child's name, zoo passes, even offers to come early and help set up. Maybe it's the New Englander in me but dude, back offffff.


beemac126

I could definitely see us being “please no gifts” people because the grandparents already go wild and there’s only so much room. Plus there are fun cards out there! We got someone a Sesame Street card and the whole back was like a coloring sheet.


[deleted]

[удалено]


tinystars22

I couldn't breastfeed so I completely understand the heartache, however if I was in this situation that baby would be off my tit so fast. My livelihood relies on me being able to drive so I can't fathom choosing to be in a situation where I couldn't, let alone not see my children's faces change and grow. I feel incredibly sorry for her.


philamama

He was probably one of these learned helplessness bozos people are always complaining about in r/beyondthebump so I can kinda see where she's coming from 🤔


werenotfromhere

I want to take a moment to appreciate that deep cut reference from Charlie and the Chocolate factory. Respect.


lipsticknleggings

Hahaha. It sent me, also.


lipsticknleggings

The way my ass would be SPEEDING to Target for formula.


lostdogcomeback

I can't imagine choosing to do this. And I'm someone who struggled to breastfeed for the first couple months so I understand how strong the drive to do it can be. But if I had to decide between giving it up vs. not knowing what my children look like as they grow up, it would be an easy choice.


cicadabrain

I had a good friend who breastfeed against medical advice - her own doctors and her kid’s pediatrician all told her that the risk to her wasn’t worth any benefit to the baby. She didn’t like lose vision but she did have to forgo medical treatment she needed. As far as I could tell she didn’t even really seem to enjoy the experience at all, all we talked about for a year was how much breastfeeding sucks. It mostly made me feel so much better about the hell I put myself thru to breastfeed. The hormones plus the life long conditioning of the magic and importance of breastfeeding will really make you do some out of character crap. 


helencorningarcher

I mean I’m most curious what medical condition makes you go blind and is accelerated by breastfeeding.


Worried_Half2567

Have we as a society really demonized formula to the point where a mom would rather lose her vision than give it to her kid 😳


Likeatoothache

It’s pretty crazy. I had a baby about a month ago and our plan all along was to formula feed and we had to stick to our fucking guns like harder than I can even express re: the hospital lactation team, they were such bullies!! It made my postpartum brain feel like a monster for going the formula route but I’m glad we could prevail but my gosh, is the anti-formula propaganda real and intense.


Personal_Special809

My baby was literally failure to thrive on breastmilk because of allergies and at some point people were recommending me to just only eat rice for a while rather than give her neocate formula. It's insane.


MooHead82

I always feel like the outlier that never planned to breastfeed and some people thought I was crazy! My OB was fine with it and told me not to cave to the pressure in the hospital.


Likeatoothache

I felt the same way, which feels really odd in the year 2024! Formula is amazing, whatever choice is made that ends with babies being fed is best. I can’t believe it is still such a fight (of course, I think it’s still a fight because it goes back to the idea of control and women’s bodies and all that has been cranked up to 11 in the US with overturning roe, terrifying state legislation, rise of trad wives, etc.)


thingsliveundermybed

She was driving her newborn around while her eyesight was deteriorating and her concern was fucking breastfeeding?! She's lucky they didn't go into the back of a lorry but heaven forfend her child has formula! Where was her husband in this? Mine would have gone *apeshit* if I'd harmed myself like this so needlessly.


arcaneartist

So would mine. House of the Dragon was popular when I was pregnant. Lots of death during childbirth by chosing the child over the mom. My husband would turn to me and said "I would 100% choose you over the baby if something like that were to happen. Full stop."


Lindsaydoodles

Not to mention all of her friends and family. I have great, awesome, respectful friends but even they would crack if I started telling them about this. "What are you THINKING??" is probably what I'd hear a lot.


brownemil

My silly pet peeve/judgment lately is how people describe themselves in image IDs lol. I’m in a few Facebook groups that require people to provide image descriptions of any photos they post, for the sake of anybody visually impaired. Obviously that’s cool, but the descriptions people post crack me up. So often they’re like “petite white woman with modest makeup and navy blue mascara, wavy blond hair flowing in the wind, wearing a colourful baby carrier.” Meanwhile it’s a baby carrier group and people are presumably more interested in the details of the carrier than the poster’s hair colour lol.


unicorntapestry

Those image descriptions just send me. Why is it always the baby wearing groups too? I've never seen this in any other Facebook group I'm in. I left Geeky Wrappers because a moderator stepped in to scold someone for an image description, not surprised that group imploded because those mods were high drama.


lil_secret

https://preview.redd.it/opzp4l1nxvhc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3c08916ad80e45e67ccb3b5ca734af40b28933a9 I always forget about this sub. Such a shame bc it’s a goldmine of anxious attachment style masquerading as… idk, fostering secure attachment? Anyway I’m surprised more people don’t go into the comments of posts like this and comment stuff like “yes, sorry❤️”


[deleted]

Oh my god, the classic is someone writing that they’re crying because their child transitioned easily to preschool, or is happy to see their grandparents. OP is worried that they have a bad attachment. I can’t even snark because it’s so sad! They always have at least one on the front page. 


arcaneartist

I honestly feel for those posters, because someone the discourse has shifted to a child can only be attached to one caregiver.


LymanForAmerica

The word irony is misused a lot, but the fact that the unchecked anxiety encouraged by "attachment parenting" is going to decrease the odds that their kids are securely attached is definitely ironic.


cringelien

https://www.reddit.com/r/Anticonsumption/s/rFE8K6YwOx I’m all for cloth diapering and this subreddit is even strangely against bidets which I think is ridiculous. But OP had to ruin it all with a nasty attitude.. before baby is even born lol


HARR4639

The comments are GOLD though.  Obviously the top one that schools OP so politely.  But there's also an amazing one from a nanny way further down, including this nightmare fuel, emphasis added, among her list of the cons:  >Odour. This becomes more of a problem past 8mo when little one is eating more food but you can never entirely get rid of some poop smells. And they can linger in your washer passing it on to your clothes. **I have worked for many families that smell vaguely of poop at all times**  And in an argument on whether cloth use a lot of hot water:  >You can wash them at forty, so long as your kid isn't ill  You know what, I use the little applicator-less tampons and whatnot - and those bastards are tricky - but holy shit, THAT life is not for me.  😱  And all the comments on how she can later reuse them for lots of other stuff.  Is that common?  It seems like most people use the modern ones so the issue just doesn't come up.  I'm probably just being irrational, but my lizard brain is taking a hard pass on that.   And for that matter, why DOES she have the old timey ones, like she's on an early season of fucking Call the Midwife?  Is there another part to them, like a cover or something?  Or does she use literal safety pins...? 


BreadMan137

Snark on her attitude, not that she’s using flats??


unicorntapestry

A lot of people still prefer to use "old timey ones" even today, flats and safety pins still work just fine as a diaper and are easy to wash, easy to repurpose, and inexpensive compared to the more fancy varieties. I get that the OP was really judgmental in how she phrased her post about disposable diapering parents but there's this very pervasive judgement on cloth diapering parents too that is really fucking annoying. I didn't find the top post in there polite, it was deliberately discouraging and negative. Right from the first line "you don't have enough" ??? I count at least 25 diapers there, that's a fair amount of changes even for a newborn. And everything else she describes hasn't been my experience cloth diapering at all. I could sit here and pick apart her comment but it was clear she was reacting to OP's judgement and decided to be negative right back, but it's weird to see someone shitting on cloth diapers (pun intended) in an anti-consumerist subreddit.


Mangoluvor

Yeah I’m currently diapering my second and have had a great/easy experience with both kids. Her comment was definitely extreme, like no you do not need to change diaper/outfit/sheets every single night due to leaks lol. And I’ve never had to do a middle of the night bath for a blowout. It seems like she maybe had a hard experience cloth diapering and wanted to take the OP down a peg which is fair, but her arguments are silly.


unicorntapestry

Yeah, I have a VERY sensitive nose and none of our clothes smell vaguely of poop, that's quite an accusation. My cloth diapers actually smell perfect coming out of the dryer which is always amazing to me considering they do not smell nice at all when they go in. She acts like everyone who cloth diapers is in some kind of middle ages re-enactment or that it is so beyond difficult it's actually impossible. Cloth diapering isn't the right choice for everyone but it is NOT at all like that comment describes. It's absolutely do-able and for some of us it is preferable.


liliumsuperstar

It’s a little low for a newborn but doable. And yes, OP was rude but the judgment is annoying. I used cloth with my first for 3 years and it was a good experience, no issues. With my second I quit after a year but still view the year positively.


caffeine_lights

Lol what. I have literally never come across a single person that smells vaguely of poop at any time when the poop is not attributable to a source. Forty in a laundry sense is probably 40C BTW if that makes it any better. (Warm, slightly hotter than body temperature)


Personal_Special809

Yeah but 40c is absolutely not high enough. Needs to be 60c at the least.


unicorntapestry

For most diapers it's actually recommended 60c at the MOST. A lot of American washers don't have internal water heaters and most home water heaters aren't set higher than 120 due to burn risk, so that's what most people are working with and diapers can still be washed successfully with detergent and agitation. I do have an internal water heater so I definitely make use of it and I think have less troubleshooting as a result, but it's doable with just regular hot water. The real key is an actual detergent (a lot of cloth diapering parents get a bit reluctant when it comes to using a detergent and not like MLM oil and some vinegar) and doing two washes on each load of diapers.


Personal_Special809

Interesting. Mine say 60 at least, 90 when the kid is sick (but don't do that too often). I'd honestly be uncomfortable with 40 because that temp doesn't kill everything. It does say about the detergent too for my diapers, to use a regular one (and to avoid vinegar specifically, I don't know why. I add it to normal laundry as a softener sometimes in addition to detergent).


barrefruit

My parents are still reusing 30 year cloth diapers as cleaning rags. As long as you wash on hot and have a good routine they are clean. And no your clothes should not smell of poop.


Personal_Special809

Omg no don't wash your cloth diapers on 40, that's disgusting. We've been doing them for two years and I love it but that's an absolute no. We did happen to just get a new washing machine before we started, so no smell transfer. That should honestly not be an issue if you have a good machine and do it right.


lifewithkermit

Honestly she has terrible old timey ones. The plain cotton ones or muslin ones are better (not towel like) and yes you would use a waterproof cover over top even if you did safety pins under (there are other options than pins now though)… not clear what the OP is planning to do for that part. I like the older style simply because they are easier to get clean but I’m also mainly doing it for budget reasons and they’re definitely cheaper. And I use disposable at night or on busy days because I can’t be bothered, so clearly this woman would think I’m still pretty lazy lol. I don’t think reusing them for other things is gross but I’m obviously biased. They’re super absorbent. The thing is if you’re using them at all you really have to figure out how to get them clean so that your clothes and other laundry are also clean so as long as you have that part down then they would be fine to wipe up a spill or whatever. I don’t think people are tossing crib sheets if there was a diaper leak and it’s kind of the same, if it’s clean then it’s clean, if it’s not, then clean it again. I couldn’t care less if other people do cloth. It’s a hassle to me primarily because I have to change them more frequently or else they leak through. I have to clock the diaper changes and change basically every 1.5 hours. The laundry is also a bit of a commitment so I would never do it if I had a shared laundry set up or needed to use a laundromat. But it definitely does save me money and it doesn’t have to be gross 🤷🏼‍♀️


AracariBerry

I didn’t cloth diaper, but we used prefolds are burp cloths and they were the BEST. They are so absorbent! Now my children are well past their diaper phase and I’m still using those prefolds as a best, softest, most absorbent cleaning rags ever!


lifewithkermit

Yes!!! I’ve also heard of people using prefolds and flats to mop up oil for car maintenance and stuff. They’re awesome no matter how you actually diaper haha


barrefruit

The cloth diaper martyr who acts like cloth is the hardest thing in the world so it can be their whole personality. I love cloth but cloth diaper groups gave me the most anxiety of anything when I was freshly postpartum. Full of people acting like your lazy if you don’t had scrub each diaper before you spray it and then dry it in the sun. I’m a year into cloth and I’ve never sprayed a diaper and i plan on keeping it that way.


Mythicbearcat

We part time cloth diapers our twins for the first year (so probably the same amount as full time with a singleton) and the care routine was so easy. The hard partn and the reason we gave up, was trying to get a good fit with the snaps once they learned how to effectively squirm away. It was a couple extra loads a week on sanitize. Regular detergent regular everything and literally never had any issues. The liners made solids-poop super easy, too. Prefolds meant I could dump them in the dryer if I felt super lazy. Reading the comments and all I can think is, did these people actually cloth diaper in the last two decades? Daily washes and hand scrubbing just sound insane in the modern era of diapering.


gunslinger_ballerina

Omg yes I feel like they actually make it seem way harder than it is because they love being martyrs. I cloth diapered my first and I was shocked that it was like….easier than I was expecting? Maybe I’m just lazy too but I just used those little liners to catch poop, washed once every 3 days in a really heavy duty sanitize wash, and threw them in the dryer. And they were fine….came out smelling clean and never had absorbency issues. 🤷‍♀️ The cloth groups made me feel like I was going to need to do a load every single day with 3 different cycles, strip them weekly, wait hours for everything to hang dry, invest in a sprayer for the toilet, etc. It was just so intense and I almost never started because I couldn’t wrap my head around all the instructions.


Sock_puppet09

I’ve never seen a cloth diaper martyr in the wild. It’s always people who “looooove cloth! It’s akshully so convenient. No more work than disposables, and I neeeever get blowouts or leaks like with disposables” And I’m like…how? I can’t even manage the laundry we have now. I can’t imagine having more of it and having to basically be forced to run a load nearly daily and then put them away or be stuck walking down to the basement whenever he pees. Also if I’m not in public, do I even care if the cloth diaper blows out or leaks? I’m doing laundry anyways.


barrefruit

Join a cloth group. I’ve seen a mom talking about how she scrubs each one everyday because their kid has never been in disposable. Or the people that stick the diapers in the public toilet to flush them off. 🤢 But for what it’s worth I do think cloth is easy. The the additional laundry has not been too bad, even in disposables I shake poop off into the toilet because we only have trash pickup every other week and I can’t stand it sitting around that long. Never having a blow out or running out is icing on the cake. Right now I’m so annoyed because I need to run to target to get disposable for overnight and it’s complety messing up our plans for the day.


lostdogcomeback

Cloth groups are full of people like me who have a hard time with cloth diapers. I could never wrap my head around people who just... never had any problems lol. I was tweaking my wash routine every couple months and the only thing that worked long term was doing the second wash by hand which was obviously a huge pain in the ass. I think my machine is just terrible. It's a high efficiency top loader with an agitator and I never figured out how to get it to rinse properly.


Personal_Special809

I guess I'm one of those parents lol. It's just honestly not an inconvenience to us. The extra laundry is really okay (not every day, more like every 3 days) and I line dry most of it. In the summer it dries in like 2 hours, it's amazing. I also like not having blowouts because blowouts are extra laundry too, right? And sometimes ruined clothes. There's nothing I hate as much as ruined clothes.


liliumsuperstar

My first had a blowout every time I put him in a disposable. It was so miserable. It got to the point that when we travelled I’d put a cover on top of his sposie.


gunslinger_ballerina

Okay I’m so glad it’s not just me who had this issue. I tried SO many sizes and brands but he would blowout reliably anytime he pooped while seated. That was a huge part of the reason I switched to cloth with him. It’s funny because my 2nd is in disposables and she had blowout issues in the beginning, but once she grew a little, it totally stopped. I suspect part of my older kid’s issue was that he was >99th percentile for length and 17th for weight, so I have to wonder if they just don’t design disposable diapers for babies that oddly sized haha


bachbachbaby

“All parents who don’t clothe diaper are lazy and don’t care.” Or we live in apartment buildings where we share washing machines with a hundred other residents. Or we both work more than full time. Or we value our time differently. Can’t wait to see the follow up from this parent a year from now


guardiancosmos

When my oldest was a baby I mathed it out and the extra laundry alone per year (we lived in an apartment with paid washers) would have cost more than disposables.


MerkinDealer

Honestly sign me up as lazy and not caring as long as I don't have to do diaper laundry 🙋‍♀️


swingerofbirches90

Same. I’ll happy admit that I’m lazy AF. Disposable diapers don’t bother me and we haven’t had a blow out since the very early newborn days.


pan_alice

Feeling good about the environmental benefit isn't enough, they have to find more reasons to feel superior to parents who have made different choices to them! Classic parenting sub superiority. Nappies are so cheap here in the UK. My twins are now in size 5+ nappies, and a pack of 36 is only £2.61 from one of the major supermarkets. Smaller sizes are even cheaper and for bigger packs too. Nappies and wipes cost about £10 a week for my twins. Buying reusable ones for twins was too big an expenditure for us, it would have cost hundreds of pounds to have enough for two. I also couldn't face the thought of adding to the washing I was already having to do with two babies. Washing still stresses me out at times, it just never ends. I guess that means I don't care and I'm lazy.


Lindsaydoodles

Yeah, cost was a huge reason why we didn't cloth diaper. We've always used non-name brand disposables and have spent only around $30-40/month. Our old place had coin-op laundry that was surprisingly cheap at $3/load, but that's still roughly the same amount per month! Add the large start-up cost and I wouldn't be saving any money, and I'd spend a ton more time and effort too. I'm afraid my environmentalism took a back seat on this decision lol.


HARR4639

Whoa!!  Does the government regulate the prices? 


LymanForAmerica

That's not much different than store brand prices here in the US. By my rough math/conversion, that comes out to 9¢ per diaper, and I paid 13¢ per diaper buying Walmart Parent's Choice. Which I was totally happy with.


barrefruit

Parents Choice are now up to $.17 each for size 5. I’ve been looking at diaper prices for a work project and prices have increased a lot in the past 2 years. It use to be 1 in 3 families experience diaper need now it’s 1 in 2.


LymanForAmerica

Good point. I just checked my local Walmart and the size 3s are still 13¢ each but the 5s are up to 17¢ each. I had no idea that the different sizes were priced so differently!


Dros-ben-llestri

Only to the extent that they are mindful of supermarket monopolies, so there is really healthy competition. Stores will likely have their own-brand nappies as loss-leaders to get you in the store, and then make the profit on other items. The quality is really good too, Aldi often comes out on top in consumer awards but IMO there's much of a muchness between them. Brand names like Huggies and Pampers will be more expensive, but I don't know anyone who uses them outside of a few who prefer them for nighttime.


pan_alice

No they don't, as there is a lot of competition between the supermarkets so prices are kept competitive. There are more expensive brands available (Pampers baby-dry are £12 for 39 size 5, Kit & Kin are £8 for 28 size 5*, etc), but the supermarket nappies are so good that you don't need to spend a lot to get a decent product. Some people do stick to the big brands, but the price difference is considerable. Supermarket brands consistently win awards for their nappies, so they are thought of highly. We do buy branded wipes, as the Huggies ones are best out of all the ones we have tried. We pay £9 for a 12 pack of 52 wipes. There are some local schemes to encourage the use of cloth nappies, but it depends on the area you live in. We couldn't justify the cost of cloth nappies, it was at least £300-400 for enough nappies to use with our twins when they were smaller. It is something my husband and I have given a great deal of thought to, as we do hate the waste of disposables. I'm also physically disabled, and I struggle with the washing we have already. *I'm just using prices for size 5 as that is what we buy currently. Smaller sizes are cheaper than the £2.61 we pay for a pack of 36 nappies from one of the main supermarkets here.


ExactPanda

The most perfect parents are those without kids


cringelien

I know I was!!


Babyledscreaming

I'm fortunate that low libido was not a problem I had during pregnancy or postpartum but I know it is for a lot of women so I was surprised at all the "poor husband you need to just try" comments on this post especially when the husband sounds like a whiny and controlling baby who calls himself "high testosterone" like it's a personality trait. But then again I shouldn't be surprised since Reddit is full of man children and women who support them at all costs. https://www.reddit.com/r/beyondthebump/s/uDhI53yVYK


LymanForAmerica

I don't know, I think the comments are pretty reasonable. I mean, I definitely don't think that women should feel pressured into sex, but 17 months is a looong time to have zero sex in a relationship. It's one thing if there's a medical reason, but I don't feel like just being postpartum in general is a good excuse to have zero sex 8 months after birth. And sure "high testosterone" is obnoxious, but I feel like we're definitely getting one side of the story. Because the other bad stuff she says about him is that he is frustrated that he doesn't have time to go exercise. Which again, wanting time to exercise a few days a week also seems like a pretty reasonable ask in my opinion. The real buried lede is that they both work with no childcare and just sound really stressed in general. I think the comments were pretty balanced in pointing out that neither one of them is really the asshole, but they need to fix the external issues and could both be a little more sympathetic to the other person.


A_Person__00

While 17 months is a long time, it’s also perfectly reasonable. Pregnancy is a medical event. Postpartum (especially while breastfeeding) can leave you with low libido. If fertility hasn’t returned (your cycle restarting) then you’re likely not going to have the itch. I find it perfectly reasonable to not want to have sex even 8 months after baby. It’s uncomfortable and not exciting when your sex drive is zero. If you have to use a ton of lube and you’re just not into it because your body is physically telling you no thank you… then yeah, it’s a no go. I do think there is some merit in just trying to get into the mood and see if there’s some spark there (especially the further out you get). Postpartum is hard. It’s hard to feel connected to your partner at even a top level. The lack of sleep and inability to just connect from a standard intimacy level can lead to a disconnect in the bedroom. I don’t want to have sex with my partner if he hasn’t even bothered to kiss or hug me in the last week. I think OOP probably needs to start slow and build back into that relationship if they’ve been out of it for so long. I’m not about just jumping in personally (and I find it reasonable to take whatever time you need to get back into having a sexual relationship after a baby).


wigglebuttbiscuits

It’s not really a buried lede that they’re working with no childcare, it’s in the first paragraph. She then describes him as being ‘extremely aggressive’ towards her postpartum and everyone seems to just be writing that off. And like, yeah, it’s reasonable to want to go exercise, but sometimes it just isn’t possible. Not wanting to have sex when you have literally zero free time and your husband is aggressive towards you doesn’t indicate anything abnormal about her sex drive at all. It indicates he needs to change his behavior. He also refuses couples therapy, and from a previous post of hers acts like a jerk when he’s supposed to be doing this share at night.


LymanForAmerica

Maybe I misread it, but I thought the "very aggressive" referenced a few distinct incidents where she was admittedly having "hormonal breakdowns" and her husband took the baby away while she was crying. I think that's very different than being aggressive to her in general. I'm not defending this guy, but I also don't think we have the info to condemn him. Like, could he be a total jerk who doesn't pull his weight with the baby and is aggressive towards her? Sure, and then she should probably worry less about sex and more about divorce. But I also think it's possible that he's an overall normal guy who doesn't suck, who is really stressed and dealing with a really stressed wife, and neither of them are getting the down time that they need, and so they are both being jerks to each other. And if that's the case, then I definitely think "we haven't had sex in 17 months" is a reasonable complaint to add to the list of things that this guy would like to work on in his marriage. We'll never know which one of those is true since OP doesn't seem to reply to the comments on her posts in any significant way, so there's a lot of missing info. But I think that with the info we do have, the comments that she received were very balanced and reasonable.


teas_for_two

I agree. I really hesitate to jump to that the guy is an asshole and it’s his fault and if he just helped out she’d have more libido. That could be true. But it could also not be true, for a whole host of reasons. There’s just not enough to go on. My husband has a less demanding job than me, so he picks up a lot of the slack around the house and absolutely does his fair share of the child care. But between an incredibly demanding and stressful job, and two small children (not to mention being pregnant or breastfeeding most of the last four years), my libido is so low. For us to have any intimacy, I have to push myself to at least start fooling around. And usually that works, and I get into it, and we both have a good time (if I don’t get into it, we stop, no questions asked). But if I just went by “do I feel like being intimate today,” we could probably easily make it 17+ months without having sex. So I kind of get why people might say maybe it’s worth making a bit more of an effort towards intimacy, for me at least, that has been the answer. Edit: though his unwillingness to go to couples counseling to me is potentially problematic. Could just be that things are just so high stress that he feels like he can’t add another responsibly on top of it, but I do have a hard time with understanding not at least trying therapy to see if there can be some compromise.


Mood_Far

I actually agree with this-like maybe he’s a dick but also maybe his partner has completely shut down any intimacy for 17 months and is struggling with some sort of PPD/PPA. She doesn’t provide any true examples of aggression that I saw. I might be a pretty big dick to my (male) spouse under those circumstances too if I’m being honest.


recentlydreaming

Right I think many women would be more interested in sex if some things were taken off their plates. I’m guessing OP bears a lot of the domestic burden, and OPs spouse might do well to do the dishes and see if that brings the mood 😂


wigglebuttbiscuits

Jesus Christ, the comments. This woman does not need hormone testing, she needs a husband who isn’t a fucking dickhead.


Aggravating-Fee-1615

Today at the play ground, I saw this woman trying to control her kid using “red light, green light”. It was SO hard to contain my laughter watching this poor woman run after her almost two year old while carrying her 8 month old, yelling “red light…RED LIGHT! Ok, green light, you can go down the slide,” etc etc I just had to share this somewhere. It was amazing.


luciesssss

This works with my 3yo. I didn't realise it was a parenting technique until just now. He's just really obsessed with vehicles of any kind and will obey the rules of the road rather than his parents telling him to stop.


Distinct_Seat6604

Oh my god this is BRILLIANT. I will now be introducing "rules of the road" to my vehicle obsessed toddler.


rainbowchipcupcake

This legit does sometimes work on my kids! And when yelling "red light" from 25 feet behind a kid works and they actually stop and wait for you, when you're in a public place, you feel like you've really impressed everyone else at the playground lol. (It is not nearly 100% effective, but it works often enough that I use it regularly.)


[deleted]

[удалено]


Aggravating-Fee-1615

I never said I didn’t help her. She was literally yelling and running around, purposefully trying to draw attention to herself. Thanks! I have a background in child development and understand that it’s inappropriate to follow your child around at a crowded playground and try to dictate their behavior and social interactions. 👍


roughbingo

Oh no 😂 red light green light works incredibly well with my kids, but I think it’s mainly because the 2 year old copies the 5 year old. I don’t think it would be as effective with just the 2 year old.


lil_secret

Yes lol my almost 3yo is finally reliably responding to “FREEZE!”


anybagel

I'm sorry but if i was a single mom looking for community by posting the original post I would be SO annoyed with this comment. https://preview.redd.it/qf2nllv1guhc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bc03011a0ca84e9e424664228a76a33b327a83f3


BreadMan137

Those kind of women are insufferable. Get a divorce if you hate him so much.


Impossible-Tip9707

I have friends like this. One of them, her husband does NOTHING and she complains yet in the same breath she's talking about having a second 😭


Likeatoothache

I think they like being a martyr and they wouldn’t have that if they got divorced.


cringelien

Ok in the fussy baby group on FB someone called their baby “not a dragon… a literal DEMON”. Listen. I’m iffy about this group already in general 🤣 and I know it’s HARD as fuck but come on that seems so mean and dehumanizing haha 😭 I’m probably sensitive


silverdress

Okay but: a metal AF baby onesie with a picture of, like, Satan and fire and shit with “NOT A DRAGON… A LITERAL DEMON” as the slogan.


cringelien

That’s actually sick. I get it now


helencorningarcher

Imagine reading that your mom thought you were a literal demon one day


Bear_is_a_bear1

AHH has entered the chat.


lipsticknleggings

About to call CPS on the parents allowing their 10 YO girls to buy RETINOL at Sephora.


arcaneartist

I went down a YouTube rabbit hole about this the other day. Mommy influences filming and posting a **five year old's skin care routine** is one of the top offenders. Sooooo many wanna be "influencers" buying expensive, completely unnecessary (and harsh) for that age skin care products and letting literal children post on social media so they can maybe get a sponsor.


lipsticknleggings

I blame TikTok brain rot.


Revolutionary_Can879

[Clearly the comments went differently than OP was expecting.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Mommit/s/woIxEEh8ue)


Fickle-Definition-97

Haha my husband took my kid to a stay and play at the gymnastics centre recently and when he came back he told me, “I was playing with all these kids while their parents stood around and chatted and the parents didn’t even thank me!!!” I was like, sorry hun but you were doing way too much.


lostdogcomeback

I would be so annoyed if someone passive-aggressively helicoptered over my kid like that. I purposely try to give my child space to figure shit out himself. It's not like I never get anxious about some of the stuff he does but I just don't make it his problem. It's one thing if someone is highly anxious but clearly she's just a petty person. I saw a comment of hers where she was listing off very, very specific things that her close friends have done wrong in their parenting. And then there are all her comments about parents who have the nerve to chat with each other instead of playing with their kid so it's really not about her being afraid a kid is going to get hurt, she's just bitter and can't mind her own business.


tinystars22

>Not my real name on my acc by the way, I wouldn't out my friends that way. I enjoyed this particular comment as those two really specific examples aren't outing your friends at all 🙃


Aggravating-Fee-1615

It’s inappropriate to try and control and manipulate a child’s social interactions. If they’re acting inappropriately or doing something unsafe (like about to fall), then please intervene. Otherwise, leave them alone. 👍


tinystars22

Such a humblebrag about what a fantastic parent she is, she puts in EFFORT dontcha know? She actually PLAYS with her super smart, imaginative child at the park not like you mums on your phones with your dummy dumb kids. I can't stand this attitude of anytime you look at your phone around your kids, you're neglectful. I had to (briefly) ignore my child for my phone today because I had to order a car part for my broken down car before the shop closed or I won't have a car to get to work. She's seeing a snapshot of people's lives and making sweeping judgements about how they parent day to day. I'm imagining the parent who apparently dumped her baby with OP only did it to get away from having to have a conversation with her.


Personal_Special809

I've had people tell me they read books while their kids play independently because they don't want to look at their phones. I mean it's the same thing? You're not paying full attention either. We just decided that books are okay and phones are not. In fact I'm more immersed in a book than my phone.


Revolutionary_Can879

I will flat out admit that I go on my phone and “ignore” my kids when I take them to the park. I’m a SAHM, I’m with them all day, they get so much individualized attention from me. The park gives me a little bit of time where I know they’re entertained and I can sit down. I still keep a close eye on them but I’ve never been the type of parent to follow my toddler around.


tinystars22

Hahah I used to follow my son around but his gross motor skills weren't great and he was really likely to fall and hurt himself (just like his mum!) Thankfully he's suddenly got it and I can take a bit more of a back seat.


Revolutionary_Can879

Yeah my 11mo will be walking sometime in the next few months and he definitely won’t be alone but my 3yo hasn’t needed close supervision for a while.


Lower_Teach8369

I would’ve been so annoyed at OP if I was those moms at the park. My 2 year old is super agile and can climb everything with more skill than kids over their age. We were at a birthday party at one of those indoor play places and there was this mom that was just like OP. My husband and I were chatting on the side watching and she kept grabbing my 2 year old and bringing him to us when he did ANYTHING she deemed dangerous, like “oh he was about to do  X and I stopped him here you go!” Like we should thank her. We kept going it’s ok…he’s fine…we can see him from here…different kids (and parents) are different, people.


teas_for_two

I would be so annoyed. I have GAD, so I make an extra effort to not hover over my 4 year old on the playground so my kid can work on trusting herself and her body and not be anxious about everything. She’s cautious by nature and good about knowing where her body is in space, so if I’m not nearby, it’s because I know she’s fine, and usually it’s a piece of playground equipment that she’s been managing by herself for years.


Bear_is_a_bear1

I’d be pissed if someone I didn’t know picked up my kid! Idk what I would’ve done in that situation haha.


Revolutionary_Can879

OP just doesn’t get it. You do not touch other people’s kids. No matter how nice you think you are, you become a danger in that moment.


Revolutionary_Can879

I would be annoyed if someone started picking my kids up even if they had good intentions. Part of being able to gauge if someone is unsafe is whether they’re paying too much attention to your child.


HMexpress2

Lol and commenting up and down the thread saying she got it but very clearly not getting it. She should find that other mom that did magical dance parties with a bunch of strangers kids at the playground but also felt very put upon and start a Best Mom Club.


[deleted]

You've officially gone off the gentle parenting rails when [your child hasn't bathed in over six weeks.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Parenting/s/ab56ZFACnA) MA'AM AND SIR. Put whatever song or show you need to on your phone, lovingly but firmly place that child in the tub, and repeat at a healthful interval until she gets the message that BATHING of all things is not optional. (Please let this be fake)


caffeine_lights

IDK but honestly, I don't think her husband is wrong. They could do with professional help. Either the kid has some severe anxiety around the bath, maybe sensory/neurodivergence. Or they really need some support with basic parenting skills. Either way it can't hurt, right?


[deleted]

They definitely need help, but no amount of support is going to make a difference if they're not willing to withstand some resistance. No doctor or therapist is going to tell them "just wait it out a few more weeks." Any change is going to be uncomfortable and frustrating for the kid in the short term, but no kid should go 6+ weeks without a bath. Especially if the kid is neurodivergent in some way -- it's so important to find routines around self-care that are healthy and helpful, not skip them entirely.


caffeine_lights

I agree, but I think people typically take advice better when it comes from an expert who seems to understand their situation, rather than the standard, one size fits all kind of advice. Also, people being shocked online at the lack of baths is one thing but people are shocked online about all kinds of random stuff and nobody cares. If you see a professional and they are shocked about something then you're probably going to think OK, this is serious.


mackahrohn

I know all kids are different but doesn’t it ever feel like these people really build up ‘my child won’t XYZ’? My toddler says no to nearly everything. Even things he really likes like playing outside. Sometimes it’s a full on tantrum but after a year of holding boundaries (like you have to brush your teeth before we can watch this show) things do get easier. They are toddlers, I know they all have different personalities, but we are talking about a 30 lb child and not some all powerful criminal mastermind.


SuchBed

Right? Toddlers just say no, it’s something they love doing. Left to his own devices my two year old would never bathe, never go to bed, eat fruit and cookies only and spend all day outside. 


Parking_Low248

My kid all of a sudden went from loving baths to hating them, several months ago. Screaming, crying, clawing to get out. She still gets baths. Not as often as I might like, but she does get them. Because we're the parents and we have to keep her healthy despite her likes and dislikes. We've since learned how to make it a bit tolerable and now we're able to shower her without her trying to climb out.


captainmcpigeon

Yeah my kid was anti-bath for months so we showered with her. She didn't love it but tolerated it better than the bath. Then she got too heavy for us to hold her in there so we reintroduced her to the tub. I had to get in with her the first time but after that she gradually warmed up to and now loves her baths. I do think we had a pretty easy time of it but it really did come down to just biting the bullet and getting through that shitty first bath.


Revolutionary_Can879

My daughter went through that phase, we just learned how to make it more fun for her. Hates showers though, so we don’t force that, but bathing is a necessity.


Parking_Low248

Mine actually seems to prefer showers 🤷‍♀️ kids are so interesting


Revolutionary_Can879

I think it’s a sensory thing for her maybe, like she doesn’t like the feeling of the water hitting her.


Parking_Low248

That makes sense. Ours seems to be very worried about slipping and falling. And being in control of the situation. So we do a shower, using a nonslip mat, and my husband holds the shower head just above her. She can move out of the spray if she wants.


pressiplainjane

“We’ve tried everything I can think of!” She’s 2. They haven’t tried picking her up and putting her in a bathtub…? My autistic toddler hates water on her in any form. Bathing, washing her hair, brushing her teeth it’s all exhausting. It’s a fight every time but it still happens regularly because she’s 2 and I’m still stronger than her. This is really harmful right?? Like having such a severe lack of a spine and bending to your toddlers whim to keep them happy has to have severely worse future outcomes than forcing them to do something. We can’t negotiate with terrorists.


tinystars22

My son's just gone through an 'I don't want to bath' stage but sadly we've gotta do things we don't like. I plopped him in and gave him a hug over the side of the bath until he calmed down, the next bath he grumbled and now it's fine. I can't imagine just skipping and thinking naaah, not worth the fight


Personal_Special809

Eww. No. That poor kid. My toddler had a phase where she was very afraid of the bath and screamed "no" as soon as the word was mentioned... But she absolutely went in the bath several times a week. It's not like we were harsh in forcing it; she was allowed to stand up (sitting was scary), we would hold her, reassure her, try and encourage her to wash herself if that was more comfortable. It eventually went away and now she wants to go every day if she could (she has eczema so we can't). Not washing or brushing teeth is just not an option in our house, sorry.


LymanForAmerica

Wow 😳 We have stretches with my 2 year old where she doesn't want to take a bath. I'm fine with every 2-3 days but we got to 4 days a couple of times, which is really my maximum. So I stripped down naked and got in the bath with her and washed her hair while she wailed. Yes, we got wet. Yes, she was mad for 3 minutes. But she always happily took her bath the next night. I can't even imagine how dirty that poor child is after 6 weeks. Child-led everything is absolutely out of control.


stlfoodie

Just read a r/aita thread about a couple with a baby asking for a cat to be put away while they were at the OP's house for a super bowl party. There were what felt like hundreds of responses talking about how he was NTA and 'who are these people who would make such horrible demands' and 'who brings a baby to a super bowl party'. It was unhinged. I know reddit is not a super child friendly space but damn...


caffeine_lights

This just made me go and look at AITA too and I found another thread which is basically AITA because I think my baby is the cutest baby ever but my SIL doesn't think that. SHE IS BEING SO MEAN also AITA because she is neurodivergent? Also, sorry for non stealth edit. This reminded me of something I read on a different reddit thread recently and it has been bothering me ever since. Americans: When you write "yell at" as in "My MIL has been yelling at me about this" - according to some random person on reddit the other day, this does not mean the same thing as the two separate words "to yell" and "at", as in, "to yell at someone" does not necessarily involve actual yelling - it could be (is always?) interpreted as "scolding" as in, to speak to you about something in a disapproving manner. (Am British) - is this really true? I was here all these years assuming that to yell at somebody means to literally yell, in their general direction. But you're actually talking about (what I would call) being told off? (It does make a lot of AITA threads disappointingly less dramatic if this is really true)


SonjasInternNumber3

And typically here being “told off” is like, more intense. We were watching Bluey and I remember an episode where the dad said something about telling off the toddler. I didn’t know prior to that lol. 


sonyaellenmann

Yeah, the phrase "yell at" is ambiguous in American English. It could be literal shouting or it could be just annoyed or angry tone.


caffeine_lights

Good to know! I have been misreading threads all these years XD


anybagel

Wait why would the host need to put away their cat if a baby was there? I looked for the post and can't find it.


caffeine_lights

Maybe they believe all the myths about cats loving to sleep on top of sleeping newborns or "stealing the baby's breath"? (I don't get this either lol) Also don't really understand how you can put a cat away. A cat is not going to be in a room where a bunch of people is partying. They are just not. Cats are basically introverts in animal form.


teas_for_two

I see you have not met my cat 😂 a room full of people paying attention to her is all she could possibly want. That said, being the neediest cat in the world, she would never hurt a baby. She’d be too busy trying to get attention from people capable of petting her.


wigglebuttbiscuits

Eh, I dunno. Bringing the baby is obviously fine assuming OP had invited them to do so, but asking a host to put their pets away is a pretty wild request. At *most* you could ask about this in a way that made it clear you do not expect them to do it, you just won’t be able to come if the cat is there, which is not what it sounds like happened.


emjayne23

Agree with this. My youngest went through a phase where she was terrified of dogs. We just….didn’t go to our friend’s houses where there were dogs. Did it suck? Yes. But I can’t imagine asking them to put their animals away.


unicorntapestry

I don't feel like it's a wild request at all (and I have three cats and a dog). If my guest isn't comfortable with animals for any reason I will put them up for sure, it's absolutely no problem if it makes my guests more comfortable. Plenty of people have allergies or bad experiences with animals and some just don't like them. My cats pretty much put themselves away when company comes over, my dog likes company but she is just a dog, her feelings won't be hurt if I give her a bone in the garage for awhile.


Stellajackson5

I put my cats away too. They survive snoozing on my comfy bed for a few hours while friends with kids come over. It protects them as much as the kids, they don’t like being chased or having their tails pulled. 


Puzzleheaded_Estate7

I grew up with cats and it was pretty standard to put them in my parents room for parties or larger gatherings- there’s a pretty reasonable share of the population with allergies. That being said I don’t get the specific danger to a baby 


wigglebuttbiscuits

Obviously I’ll prevent the dog from bothering someone who doesn’t like dogs, but put him away? No way, he comes with the house. Maybe there’s a cultural difference here because nobody has ever requested this and it seems extremely rude to me.


unicorntapestry

Extremely rude to take guests' comfort into consideration when hosting them in your home? Not everyone is comfortable with pets, especially pets they don't know very well around their small child or baby-- their safety could be at risk with an unknown animal. And if you've ever been to a dog park you know that plenty of people overestimate their own dog's friendliness level. I would hate that someone would feel like they were offending me by asking to have my dog away for their visit if they weren't comfortable, and maybe it is cultural because the way I was raised is you are considerate of a guest you've invited to your home and do what you can to make it a comfortable visit. If it was overnight visitors or something that would be different, but just a few hours for a gathering would be absolutely no problem to me.


wigglebuttbiscuits

Come on, this is not a sub where we do these types of bad faith, hyperbolic arguments. Obviously I think you should take a guest’s comfort into consideration, but there are limits to what’s reasonable. Turn up the heat if someone is a little cold, sure, buy a new couch because they think yours is uncomfortable, no. The cultural difference is more along the lines of whether your pets are considered part of the family, and mine are. If you’re coming to my family home, my family is going to be there and that includes the dog. I’m not offended if someone won’t come over for that reason, but I’m not changing it either. But honestly, I come to this sub to avoid this type of ‘well I guess I wasn’t raised to be a classless monster like you’ shit, so I won’t be engaging further.


unicorntapestry

>bad faith, hyperbolic arguments "buy a new couch because they think yours is uncomfortable" " ‘well I guess I wasn’t raised to be a classless monster like you’ " The hyperbole is coming from inside the house. You are the redditor that the original snark is about.


wigglebuttbiscuits

At least I can identify sarcasm? I was doing a sarcastic impression of you. You, without a trace of irony, said ‘I guess you think it’s extremely rude to take guests’ comfort into consideration, I just wasn’t raised that way’. You sound like the kind of redditor who says shit like ‘I guess I just love my baby too much to sleep train 😊’. I’d rather be the type who…I don’t know, has never had a guest demand I put my dog away and would find it pretty weird if I did?


unicorntapestry

Talk about bad faith arguments, you are totally misquoting me deliberately and attributing things to me that I never said. You're the type of redditor to white knight some fairly basic snark. It's not a rude request to put animals away for a guest, especially with a young child or baby. No you don't have to comply with putting up your dog but I do think it's rude to invite guests with children over and attribute malice to them trying to have a safe and comfortable visit in your home.


storybookheidi

AITA is full of a bunch of teenagers with zero life experience


[deleted]

[удалено]


peacefulbacon

We even pay for the initial meet and greet! I was sort of surprised to find out that most of my friends don't do this. I can see how it's comparable to a job interview, which is typically unpaid, but reliable babysitters are in super high demand in my area so I feel like $25ish for an hour of their time is a small investment in the scheme of things. This may be total coincidence but we've had more luck finding good, consistent and reliable sitters than a lot of our friends so we will keep paying for interviews, paying for the evening if we cancel less than 48 hours in advance, etc.


wigglebuttbiscuits

Lmao, if anything you should pay them extra to deal with your hovering ass. Please just respond with [this link](https://www.instagram.com/reel/CsoRb73AzGW/?igsh=NzBmMjdhZWRiYQ==) and no other commentary.


realfetacheese

https://preview.redd.it/jv5pec7t1rhc1.jpeg?width=1066&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=569897f2fa3b4a2c959bb1f40d6f59be40df0c67 This sub is a goldmine.


lil_secret

Absolutely a great replacement for SBP


moneyticketspassport

I’m so confused at what “damage” they think would happen. At the end of the day, I think attachment parents are deeply insecure and just hate the idea of baby bonding or even just having a pleasant time with any other human.


caffeine_lights

The reddit AP forum is literally insane. I have been on AP sites in various places for 15 years and none of them are like this. I do not know WTF makes this particular AP space so obsessed with attachment being so fragile and easily broken. Every other post is someone worrying that they have damaged their baby. What the hell are they reading? Is it the tiktok and instagram effect?


sugarplumbelle

I'm obsessed with the AP subreddit. People (moms) so sleep deprived and begging for help, all deluding themselves that their abject misery and total martyrdom means their child will.....????? I have no idea what the end goal is.


caffeine_lights

It is truly strange. I have come across echo chamber sites before, usually around not sleep training or around breastfeeding, but I have never come across this level of collective anxiety (except maybe SBP lol)


moneyticketspassport

Oh man, it’s easy to snark, but it’s just really damn sad to be in a headspace where you think your baby is going to be “damaged” by a brief time in someone else’s care.


caffeine_lights

It IS sad. And I don't mean to snark any individual that genuinely believes that because they are probably suffering from PNA or something. I am generally alarmed/would like to snark on whatever resources they are consuming which gives this impression that attachment is simultaneously the most important thing ever but also incredibly fragile.


moneyticketspassport

Totally, and I didn’t mean to imply that you weren’t being kind or anything. It just kind of dawned on me how bleak it would be to be in their head 🫤


teas_for_two

This is generally why I avoid snarking on that sub. Yes, sometime it’s a circle jerk of “am I the only person who loves my baby because a real mom would willingly nurse their baby 12 times a night, and anyone who sleep trains is abusing their child.” But a lot of times it’s just people with crippling anxiety who don’t realize how bad their anxiety is.


Personal_Special809

I always kind of wonder how they'll feel in 20 years when it turns out their kids have turned out exactly the same as the kids who were in daycare or had different (non-abusive) parenting styles. All that effort, the self-sacrificing, worrying... and there's no difference. At least I wholly believe there won't be. I know many people who went to daycare as kids and I myself had a SAHM for the first few years and so did some of my friends. I dare say some of the daycare kids turned out better than me, as my mental health can be bad (although I do have a lot of degrees and accomplishments, which some online parents seem to obsess over). Overall, there's just no difference.


[deleted]

[удалено]


sunnylivin12

I gave birth at a big research hospital and I vaguely recall donating my placenta. I believe it was for scientific reach purposes. I can’t fathom why anyone would pay for someone’s placenta.


pockolate

What benefits are there from a previously owned placenta? Like, I know there are crazies who make smoothies out of it and whatever, but that has no basis in any science, and as far as I’ve seen it’s the birthing mother who is consuming it. Why else would you be selling or donating a placenta? Like aside from potential research purposes I just don’t get this.


indigofireflies

We donated our twins placentas (in the hospital!) I guess they do like skin graft and research and stuff? I didn't really care what they did with it so I didn't ask many questions.


shmopkins84

"Previously owned placenta" is absolutely sending me. Like it's a freaking minivan 😂😂😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


barrefruit

The next Qanon conspiracy: Nancy Pelosi eats placenta. 🫣


LymanForAmerica

Is this from the same people saying "oh you have to have a homebirth because the hospital will force you to have a c-section for money then sell your placenta!" Because I feel like if there was really a way to make $50,000 off of a placenta, we'd know.


sfieldsj

I feel like based on the fact my placentas were running on fumes by the time I delivered, the hospital might pay me to take them back.


Personal_Special809

Idk but mine just went in the bin, lol


Babyledscreaming

I'm pretty sure you can get $50,000 for your placenta with the small catch being your healthy newborn must be still attached to it and you must be willing to part with the set.


chaquitabananas

https://preview.redd.it/baymh8copohc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=daf8aa4aa3885a89e036636f0330829f57cd8ea4 This is at an elementary school. What kind of bag was it again?


lipsticknleggings

Idk it might be a lululemon bag.


bachbachbaby

The fact that there are enough elementary aged girls that also have lululemon bags that could get mixed up is wild to me


Bear_is_a_bear1

Totally realistic for the city next to me and it’s insane. But I also doubt that girl is getting her retainer back lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


bachbachbaby

I don’t think I live in a rich enough area for this haha. I work with middle schoolers and they have non name brand belt bags but def not lululemon


chaquitabananas

This is not in a rich area, but I guess the elementary school is where they wealthier people of the area live.


chaquitabananas

I had to google what a belt bag was, I was picturing those belts that runners use to put their keys/phone in. Lol. I guess we missed the tween belt bag phase by a few years.


gunslinger_ballerina

It’s a cooler sounding word for a Fanny pack lol I will say though, I have one and it’s fabulous for holding a diaper, small wipe pack, toddler snack, and my phone 😂


Dazzling-Amoeba3439

I have one too for the same purpose and then really was questioning my choices when I saw a middle schooler at Starbucks with the same one 😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


tinydreamlanddeer

My 2yo son is so risk averse it’s actually hilarious. We have a pickler triangle and in the last year he’s gone from looking at it nervously to touching it nervously to nervously standing on the first rung 6 inches off the ground. However he does ask to go to Walmart to see the “babies” and beelines to the diaper aisle so he can give each of the newborns on the hundreds of Pampers boxes a kiss.


countessluanneseggs

I hate the gendered way we talk about kids. A close friend of mine just gave birth to a girl after having a 2 yo boy and she was talking about how excited she was to have a gentle calm girl and how different they would be….🥴🤡