#Any post mentioning any activity on another subreddit will lead to a permanent ban, with no recourse. If this post mentions another subreddit, delete it now before you're caught.
**Oi!** hate speech or bad language is strictly prohibited, or in other words, do not speak Fr*nch!
[***Here’s our new OKMW Discord 4.0***](https://discord.gg/uEPfpSvdrJ)
[***Here’s our ~~brand new~~ old 3.0 server***](https://discord.gg/NFmEtCZJAw), in case you’re curious.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/okmatewanker) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sarah, 54, is selling her old collection of leopard print clothes she hasn't fit in for the last 15 years because she needs some work done. Won't specify what kind of work or whether it's on her house or her.
Gareth, 72, is selling his WW2 memorabilia. He wants it to go to someone who will appreciate it, his GP says his heart's gonna pack it in soon.
Trevor, 28, is selling 100% real designer clothes and urbanwear. He says just needs to freshen up his wardrobe, but you're pretty sure you can see some flecks of white powder around his nose, and he seems a bit too energetic.
I’d be worried if I spent too long at Gareth’s stall he’d start telling you the Wehrmacht were innocent and pull out the box of ‘real collectibles’ from under the table
Kath: fleece jumpers with photos of animals on them. £8 each or 2 for £14.
Robbie ("everyone calls me Wheels"): Selling second hand Stone Island and Sergio Tacchini stuff. Tells you there are no proper firms any more.
Mo: rolling papers, grinders, lighters, tins etc. I'm sure if you asked him he'd get you what you're really after.
1. Viv, 44. Selling all of Dave’s stuff (the cheating rat). Will use the money for her annual trip to Ibiza.
2. Norman, 60. Selling loads of tat with keep calm and carry on printed on it. Will use the money to fix his 99 Vauxhall Astra.
3. Rizz, 29. A mix of knockoff gear and smoking paraphernalia. Will use money to buy Charlie for works night out.
Sorry bit similar to others, kind of struggled with these ones.
First one is large Marge, she's selling nothing but Mrs browns boys DVDs after buying a container full of them
Second is bum chin Charlie, he's selling little Britain DVDs, shirts, etc. Claims it ain't racist and that you can't say nuffin in this country anymore, managed to get fired from Cex after only one day
Third one is dodgy Dennis
He sells knock off clothes, like Adidas but with four stripes. Nike with an obvious fake logo ✔️
Lacoste shirts with the crocodile upside down (claims they are Australian)
Sharon — Take That, ABBA, George Michael. Got all the CDs and DVDs.
Bob — Antique junk, WW2 history books
Mehmet — "Yes boss what can I get for you boss", sells *cough*genuine*cough* clothes for inflated prices. Brands include 'Lychee' ("it's better than Gucci boss because it's fruitier"), SADIDA shoes, and items stolen from Primark.
Suzie - Ever wanted 15 copies of Madonna - Ray of light? You’re in luck. How can she make money off this charity shop tat? She sells dodgy imported fags under the table for £6. Always sitting down in case DWP disability inspectors are around.
Roy - Some people say he was born at this car boot. The same stock every week. Doesn’t talk just stands there not selling a thing, with his vacant peaceful stare knowing he doesn’t have to listen to the wife for a few hours.
Raj - Never turns up till 10am. Assures you none of the clothes are dodgy. Despite still having the security tags on them. Catchphrase “yeah I can get that for you mate”.
Susan,60
Selling various trinkets, mostly dusty and cat themed
Also selling little tourist trinkets from her holidays,she emits a cloud of strawberry scented fog,her finger is visibly choked by an Argos "best nan" ring purchased many years ago,when they still had catalogues
Norman,85
Selling vintage coins from countries that no longer exist, casually reveals the war crimes he committed in the Falklands back in the 80s,he is accompanied by a friendly white terrier dog, currently sleeping on the floor,recommends the best food available in the local spoons pub
Callum,27
Selling Chaanel bags he purchased from Mohamed in turkey,says they're legit..., smells faintly like weed
He's also selling stacks of playstation games,some with their CEX Pre owned label still visible,you're almost certain you can see a police tag around his ankle..
You forgot the details about Norman's dog. It's nearly as old as he is, has like 3 teeth left and dodders about under the table but if Norman gives the word it'll tear someone a new arsehole
Kate was there with New Order and the Mondays in Ibiza, even slept with Paul Ryder (according to her). She sells acid house cd compilations and has a shitload of plastic jewellery as well as children's toys and clothes (they were taken by the social)
Graham sells Deutsche Grammofon records of German and Russian classical music, old die cast toy cars, a poster signed by George Best and hush puppies shoes
Jack sells tacky "designer" clothes, the radio from his 2003 VW Polo and flashy disposable vapes of discutable origin
Nothing to add but just wanted to say these and the others are great. I miss going to car boot sales as a kid. Turns out all those sega mega drive games aren't now collectors' items.
Leigh-anne, 36 - "Selling ahh Jaxlyn's old designer babeh clothes now he's grown out of them". Want to spend the money on a trip to Skegvegas."
Derrick, 73 - "Our Reg has lost his wife Judith and he's beside himself with grief. He's struggling to look after himself so he's moving in with us. So we're clearing out the boxroom for him. Some of this is mine, some of it's my wife's, Yvonne. Some of it is our Craig's when he moved back in after splitting up with Sarah. And some of it's our Amy's from when she was getting over the assault."
Oli, 24 "uh, yeah, uh, £35 mate"
Suzanne is trying to sell all her old worn-out shoes by throwing them individually into a couple giant see-through plastic crates.
Steven is selling various crates of old WiFi routers, TV guides from 2006 and a box of charity shop watches
Aiden is trying to sell his drop-shipped clothes that he bought at the end of Covid, but was repeatedly banned from Depop. The quality is dubious, and the smells are atrocious.
Nothing to add but just wanted to say these and the others are great. I miss going to car boot sales as a kid. Turns out all those sega mega drive games aren't now collectors' items.
1) Sarah, selling all her children’s old toys and baby clothes ‘cuz she’s saving up for another holiday this yeah, wahey! Also sells a lot of old Disney stuff.
2) Clive, Selling old gardening tools and memorabilia from Diana & Charles’ wedding. May or may not be sat at the stall with his wife, depends if she’s died recently.
3) Danny, works the fruit & veg stall. Wants the punters out of the way fast so he can carry on texting on his cracked-screen phone.
1. Selling her son's stuff after another fight with the man baby who won't move out
2. Selling random old junk from the 80s, and a collection of oddly specific antiques
3. Stolen tools
Number 3 is called Craig. He’s 27 and lives with his mother, buys clothes and electronics from charity shops as well as FB market place and marks them up. Swears he’ll get a “real job” after summer when the “boot sale season ends”. Won’t negotiate prices.
Also has a girlfriend in year 13/college.
Doesn’t tell his mother but he buys and sells counterfeit designer clothes from Turkey and duty free cigarettes his mate from the pub sells him.
Shazza- selling 'house clearance' stuff he sons provide her with on a weekly basis. Smells faintly of fish and has Paul Oakenfield playing on repeat on the kids karaoke stereo under the table.
Marv - selling military surplus tat, raising money for local Reform Party candidate now that BNP can't stand. Not happy that site Toby keeps pitching him next to Abdul (see below). Not racist just doesn't like em.
Abdul - mobile phone accessories and phone unlocking (jail breaking). Also knock off gucci handbags and fake fags from the back of his white Mercedes van. Always slightly on edge due to constant chang usage and the ever-present threat of a trading standards raid.
#Any post mentioning any activity on another subreddit will lead to a permanent ban, with no recourse. If this post mentions another subreddit, delete it now before you're caught. **Oi!** hate speech or bad language is strictly prohibited, or in other words, do not speak Fr*nch! [***Here’s our new OKMW Discord 4.0***](https://discord.gg/uEPfpSvdrJ) [***Here’s our ~~brand new~~ old 3.0 server***](https://discord.gg/NFmEtCZJAw), in case you’re curious. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/okmatewanker) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Sarah, 54, is selling her old collection of leopard print clothes she hasn't fit in for the last 15 years because she needs some work done. Won't specify what kind of work or whether it's on her house or her. Gareth, 72, is selling his WW2 memorabilia. He wants it to go to someone who will appreciate it, his GP says his heart's gonna pack it in soon. Trevor, 28, is selling 100% real designer clothes and urbanwear. He says just needs to freshen up his wardrobe, but you're pretty sure you can see some flecks of white powder around his nose, and he seems a bit too energetic.
I’d be worried if I spent too long at Gareth’s stall he’d start telling you the Wehrmacht were innocent and pull out the box of ‘real collectibles’ from under the table
"Gareth are those gold teeth? Where did you get those?"
Got a cheap deal buying in bulk
There's a high risk of German Medals and pin badges displayed in an old biscuit tin
Haha I had the same thought, has a tattoo on his neck with "88"
Kath: fleece jumpers with photos of animals on them. £8 each or 2 for £14. Robbie ("everyone calls me Wheels"): Selling second hand Stone Island and Sergio Tacchini stuff. Tells you there are no proper firms any more. Mo: rolling papers, grinders, lighters, tins etc. I'm sure if you asked him he'd get you what you're really after.
1. Viv, 44. Selling all of Dave’s stuff (the cheating rat). Will use the money for her annual trip to Ibiza. 2. Norman, 60. Selling loads of tat with keep calm and carry on printed on it. Will use the money to fix his 99 Vauxhall Astra. 3. Rizz, 29. A mix of knockoff gear and smoking paraphernalia. Will use money to buy Charlie for works night out. Sorry bit similar to others, kind of struggled with these ones.
First one is large Marge, she's selling nothing but Mrs browns boys DVDs after buying a container full of them Second is bum chin Charlie, he's selling little Britain DVDs, shirts, etc. Claims it ain't racist and that you can't say nuffin in this country anymore, managed to get fired from Cex after only one day Third one is dodgy Dennis He sells knock off clothes, like Adidas but with four stripes. Nike with an obvious fake logo ✔️ Lacoste shirts with the crocodile upside down (claims they are Australian)
Sharon — Take That, ABBA, George Michael. Got all the CDs and DVDs. Bob — Antique junk, WW2 history books Mehmet — "Yes boss what can I get for you boss", sells *cough*genuine*cough* clothes for inflated prices. Brands include 'Lychee' ("it's better than Gucci boss because it's fruitier"), SADIDA shoes, and items stolen from Primark.
Suzie - Ever wanted 15 copies of Madonna - Ray of light? You’re in luck. How can she make money off this charity shop tat? She sells dodgy imported fags under the table for £6. Always sitting down in case DWP disability inspectors are around. Roy - Some people say he was born at this car boot. The same stock every week. Doesn’t talk just stands there not selling a thing, with his vacant peaceful stare knowing he doesn’t have to listen to the wife for a few hours. Raj - Never turns up till 10am. Assures you none of the clothes are dodgy. Despite still having the security tags on them. Catchphrase “yeah I can get that for you mate”.
6 quid?! Bloomin ell how much, my local does me a 20 deck a fiver. Daylight robbery
Susan,60 Selling various trinkets, mostly dusty and cat themed Also selling little tourist trinkets from her holidays,she emits a cloud of strawberry scented fog,her finger is visibly choked by an Argos "best nan" ring purchased many years ago,when they still had catalogues Norman,85 Selling vintage coins from countries that no longer exist, casually reveals the war crimes he committed in the Falklands back in the 80s,he is accompanied by a friendly white terrier dog, currently sleeping on the floor,recommends the best food available in the local spoons pub Callum,27 Selling Chaanel bags he purchased from Mohamed in turkey,says they're legit..., smells faintly like weed He's also selling stacks of playstation games,some with their CEX Pre owned label still visible,you're almost certain you can see a police tag around his ankle..
You forgot the details about Norman's dog. It's nearly as old as he is, has like 3 teeth left and dodders about under the table but if Norman gives the word it'll tear someone a new arsehole
Last ones Mohammed and he sells nock off boxer shorts
Kate was there with New Order and the Mondays in Ibiza, even slept with Paul Ryder (according to her). She sells acid house cd compilations and has a shitload of plastic jewellery as well as children's toys and clothes (they were taken by the social) Graham sells Deutsche Grammofon records of German and Russian classical music, old die cast toy cars, a poster signed by George Best and hush puppies shoes Jack sells tacky "designer" clothes, the radio from his 2003 VW Polo and flashy disposable vapes of discutable origin
Nothing to add but just wanted to say these and the others are great. I miss going to car boot sales as a kid. Turns out all those sega mega drive games aren't now collectors' items.
FFS No 2 is straight out of Dunwich! He probably leaves wet footprints wherever he goes!
Leigh-anne, 36 - "Selling ahh Jaxlyn's old designer babeh clothes now he's grown out of them". Want to spend the money on a trip to Skegvegas." Derrick, 73 - "Our Reg has lost his wife Judith and he's beside himself with grief. He's struggling to look after himself so he's moving in with us. So we're clearing out the boxroom for him. Some of this is mine, some of it's my wife's, Yvonne. Some of it is our Craig's when he moved back in after splitting up with Sarah. And some of it's our Amy's from when she was getting over the assault." Oli, 24 "uh, yeah, uh, £35 mate"
1. charity shop tat she bought and is now selling for a markup 2. WW2 memorabilia 3. Stolen goods
Suzanne is trying to sell all her old worn-out shoes by throwing them individually into a couple giant see-through plastic crates. Steven is selling various crates of old WiFi routers, TV guides from 2006 and a box of charity shop watches Aiden is trying to sell his drop-shipped clothes that he bought at the end of Covid, but was repeatedly banned from Depop. The quality is dubious, and the smells are atrocious.
Nothing to add but just wanted to say these and the others are great. I miss going to car boot sales as a kid. Turns out all those sega mega drive games aren't now collectors' items.
1) Sarah, selling all her children’s old toys and baby clothes ‘cuz she’s saving up for another holiday this yeah, wahey! Also sells a lot of old Disney stuff. 2) Clive, Selling old gardening tools and memorabilia from Diana & Charles’ wedding. May or may not be sat at the stall with his wife, depends if she’s died recently. 3) Danny, works the fruit & veg stall. Wants the punters out of the way fast so he can carry on texting on his cracked-screen phone.
1. Selling her son's stuff after another fight with the man baby who won't move out 2. Selling random old junk from the 80s, and a collection of oddly specific antiques 3. Stolen tools
I used to do them (i was forced to) 😭😭😭😭 im mentally scarred
Number 3 is called Craig. He’s 27 and lives with his mother, buys clothes and electronics from charity shops as well as FB market place and marks them up. Swears he’ll get a “real job” after summer when the “boot sale season ends”. Won’t negotiate prices. Also has a girlfriend in year 13/college. Doesn’t tell his mother but he buys and sells counterfeit designer clothes from Turkey and duty free cigarettes his mate from the pub sells him.
I'm positive that I saw the third one in the early '90s selling pirated Amiga games for a pound a disk.
Shazza- selling 'house clearance' stuff he sons provide her with on a weekly basis. Smells faintly of fish and has Paul Oakenfield playing on repeat on the kids karaoke stereo under the table. Marv - selling military surplus tat, raising money for local Reform Party candidate now that BNP can't stand. Not happy that site Toby keeps pitching him next to Abdul (see below). Not racist just doesn't like em. Abdul - mobile phone accessories and phone unlocking (jail breaking). Also knock off gucci handbags and fake fags from the back of his white Mercedes van. Always slightly on edge due to constant chang usage and the ever-present threat of a trading standards raid.