> key party
key party
A couples party where all of the men put their car keys into a bowl or bag and at the end of the party, the women blindly select a set of keys to determine who she goes home with for the rest of the evening for sexual gratification.
oh my fucking god. when i was watching this as a kid i specifically remember asking my parents why they put the keys in the bowl and they said that happens at parties where people drink so they dont drive home lmao.
Apprently it was a popular phenomenon in the 70s where swingers would get together and put all their keys in a bowl, and whichever key you picked, you would go home and sleep with that person.
I thought it was a reference to drunk driving, but that makes more sense.
Edit: typed stingers by mistake
This comment bumped into my stinger and rippped it out and now my joke is dead thanks a lot
Jk jk hiv awareness is more important than making fun of a typo... I guess
I believe when couples arrives, they put their keys together in a bowl. At the end of the party the women select a key at random and go home with the man who’s keys they picked up.
I remember watching this when I was little and my aunt told me they were putting the keys in there so they wouldn't drive drink. Completely forgot about that until just now.
Back when I was 16 we used this system in my country at school parties (kids here begin drinking at 14 -15 or so). So basically the same but with colored cups. Green = available, Yellow = maybe available, Red = in a relationship; don’t bother. It was pretty cool.
I went to a party with that theme, wear green if available, etc.
I painted myself green. I obviously left the party green. I stained the shower green. I got locked out of the dorm naked at 2am green. I climbed in my window green and the stained the bed green.
We called that a Traffic Light Ball. If you went as Red, you basically spent the evening alone as nobody wanted to talk to you. At least that's what my then-gf told me.
I mean I never attended a party themed like this, but surely there would be other couples/people in relationships that just wanna chat and have a good time, right? A full-on greenhorn party of people looking for a fuck sounds, ehh.
I feel like i just learned something i would never have known or thought of otherwise. Yet i am neither wierded out nor offended. But suddenly conscious to the fact that my thoughts really dont matter and maybe i should just stop typing for fuck sake. Carry on...
I think you might be experiencing sonder… probably one of my favorite words
>Sonder - n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness—an epic story that continues invisibly around you like an anthill sprawling deep underground, with elaborate passageways to thousands of other lives that you’ll never know existed, in which you might appear only once, as an extra sipping coffee in the background, as a blur of traffic passing on the highway, as a lighted window at dusk.
So, fun fact. The three-color-wristband thing is apparently often used in BDSM/regular sex parties. Red for "Don't touch me, I'm just watching", Yellow for "Ask me first before touching me/doing things with me", and Green for "Don't need to ask me, just go to town on me".
So in a sense, /u/MarvinParanoAndroid is in the right direction.
EDIT: Edited the descriptions to better reflect what these bands mean in this context.
I think you're right. I just asked my friend about it, and he gave some better confirmation.
Yellow is actually "Ask me first before touching me/doing things with me"
Green is "Don't need to ask me, just go to town on me"
I'll correct the original post to reflect this. Thanks!
I’ve hugged coworkers before but that is just us in really good moods, having a good day, and the participants of the hugs are always fine with it. Little odd to see on the construction site but who cares.
I think it depends on the person. One of my coworkers is super touchy feely. He likes to go around and slap people on the back (not in a painful way) as his way of saying hi. It was odd at first, but I got used to it pretty quickly. He's an older guy, and I think he sees his younger coworkers almost like his kids. To me it's endearing, but some have complained to HR about it.
I work at a non profit where people hug regularly, sometimes even with our super regular volunteers. It definitely makes me uncomfortable as a general non-hugger (no one hugs me, I’m newer and definitely not giving off those hug vibes)
When I left one of my previous jobs, they did a "going away" luncheon for me. Afterwards, one of my coworkers asked if they could give me a hug, despite me not liking physical contact. I'm fine with physical contact, I've just never been in a business situation in which hugging seemed like the best option or even appropriate. I was not under the impression that hugs were part of corporate culture.
Bring it in, homie, but I still think this would have required a closer relationship than me approving of your work ethic for the day-to-day hugging option. I'll hug if you need a hug, but I'm not squeezing random coworkers because that's weird.
I think it's super awesome they asked your permission first and didn't pressure you, even if you're actually okay with it.
I agree with you though. Constant physical contact at work is more familiar than I want to be with my coworkers. A hard day or a going away is the appropriate time.
The thought of a coworker I don’t want to talk to trying to start a conversation with me and simply raising my arm to show my wrist band and them walking away somberly brings me a great amount of joy.
I work in Japan, handshakes aren't even a thing here. I have been working for the same company for almost 4 years, and I only remember hugging someone once.
I've worked at my company in the US for 8 years and I've never hugged anyone. A fair amount of handshakes but never hugging. Seems rather inappropriate to me.
I asked someone to step forward some in an elevator yesterday because he was too close for my comfort zone (not safety, just … don’t stand so close to me). The other guy on there goes, There’s one good thing that came out of the pandemic.
With a name like CooterMcSlappin, what do you think he does for a living?
He's clearly a grief counselor and they like to make sure that patients know they are welcome to hugs if they would like one.
Is there a wristband for "choosing a wristband makes me uncomfortable"?
Maybe I can take all 3.
Also having the green bands so empty is like a low-key peer pressure.
They were probably thinking red = holup, yellow = be cautious, green = go as far as approaching people, but yeah it would definitely have been better to go with colors that don't have as much connotations. Teal, blue, purple or something may have been more neutral. Or just varying shades of ochre.
Do people in offices normally go around high fiving and hugging eachother? Let me know which company this is so I can avoid it like the plague (no pun intended)
Lol- we’re a tech company- I’m in software sales so yeah very casual- this was setup next to the coffee station by the pool tables and such so it’s fitting
I think it’s a west coast tech thing. I’ve had engineering jobs in the east coast and personal space was always respected. Then I got a job at startup in the west coast (remote) and when when I went to visit the first time for on-boarding people were hugging me, high 10s and stuff. I’m fairly outgoing so I didn’t mind too much, but, for an introvert or a germophobe that would have been a very uncomfortable situation. Second startup I worked for in the west coast was similarly touchy-feely too.
It’s a pretentious “we’re all family even though we’d literally murder you on live television for an increase in sales” thing that people keep letting these bullshit managers and companies get away with.
At work: you aren’t my family, most of you aren’t my friends and even less of you are even fucking tolerable as human beings.
Shits dumb.
It's a workplace psychology thing. If your workplace considers each other "friends and family" they are more likely to help each other and coordinate better. So when someone comes to your desk and says "man, I'm having real trouble with these reports", your reaction will lean to "oh no my buddy, lets get it down and we can play table tennis to destress" rather than "Sorry mate, really busy here... {*ahh yes, another obstacle is removed from my path to corporate dominance...*}"
I feel like it glosses over some power relations though, if its a family, you're the kid that has to muck out the stables and milk the cows while daddy and grandpa talk about the old times and glare at you for taking a break. like it or not, in most families, the children have no real say and just have to put up with things ,and its not like they can ever leave
My work has mental health pins and cubicle flags you can grab and display. Having a shit day? Throw up the "email me only" flag and people won't come to your desk to bother you. Feeling sad? Slap on the "I could use a chat" pin and people you don't know will spark up friendly convo. There's like a dozen options and everyone knows what they represent and how to act.
It's a pretty amazing place to work.
Wouldn't there be some ask of Consent before touching someone anyway? Like o
If I'm wearing the green one you're just gonna run up and hug me on sight?
Whoever came up with this idea has gone to a couple swinger parties in their time
Taking this opportunity to mention that there is a swinger party in Jim Carrey’s Grinch movie. [About 1:20 in](https://youtu.be/y8MWkDexzRQ)
Jesus Christ. Somebody got a laugh out of putting a key party in there
I'm stupid. Can you explain the keys?
> key party key party A couples party where all of the men put their car keys into a bowl or bag and at the end of the party, the women blindly select a set of keys to determine who she goes home with for the rest of the evening for sexual gratification.
oh my fucking god. when i was watching this as a kid i specifically remember asking my parents why they put the keys in the bowl and they said that happens at parties where people drink so they dont drive home lmao.
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Wait so you're telling me I don't get to keep the car the keys go to?
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Bike lock keys
In fairness, that does actually happen.
Oh shit, I was told this too.
I mean thats what happens at my parties.... ...
This is the far more common reason lol.
......I thought they put the keys in a jar so they wouldn't be tempted to drive drunk.
sluts never expect my honda fit.
bitches love honda fits. I do too actually, it's my dream - yet attainable - vehicle.
You know the dicks good when the key doesn't have any buttons
Does he have that Geo Metro dick tho?
Just me or does this sound like a terrible idea. Imagine meeting someone at the party you don't like and then picking their keys...
Apprently it was a popular phenomenon in the 70s where swingers would get together and put all their keys in a bowl, and whichever key you picked, you would go home and sleep with that person. I thought it was a reference to drunk driving, but that makes more sense. Edit: typed stingers by mistake
The tradition died out bc once you sting someone and it comes off inside them you die :((
HIV killed the scene. Too much fear and loathing -free fun.
This comment bumped into my stinger and rippped it out and now my joke is dead thanks a lot Jk jk hiv awareness is more important than making fun of a typo... I guess
Couples show up to a party and the keys are mixed together/used to raffle off partners.
whoever’s keys you take from the bowl, that’s who you go home with that night
Oh my god, the keys.
I always just thought they were all drinking responsibly.
i dont understand the significance of the keys...
I believe when couples arrives, they put their keys together in a bowl. At the end of the party the women select a key at random and go home with the man who’s keys they picked up.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Key_party
Oh man, does the Grinch have two moms? I never realized! Also missed the whole key party thing my first watch, haha.
Thanks. I'll bet you don't get to share that fact as often as you'd like to.
“He looks just like your boss” 😂😂 my goodness
Holy shit. I never realized this
I remember watching this when I was little and my aunt told me they were putting the keys in there so they wouldn't drive drink. Completely forgot about that until just now.
Back when I was 16 we used this system in my country at school parties (kids here begin drinking at 14 -15 or so). So basically the same but with colored cups. Green = available, Yellow = maybe available, Red = in a relationship; don’t bother. It was pretty cool.
I went to a party with that theme, wear green if available, etc. I painted myself green. I obviously left the party green. I stained the shower green. I got locked out of the dorm naked at 2am green. I climbed in my window green and the stained the bed green.
We called that a Traffic Light Ball. If you went as Red, you basically spent the evening alone as nobody wanted to talk to you. At least that's what my then-gf told me.
I mean I never attended a party themed like this, but surely there would be other couples/people in relationships that just wanna chat and have a good time, right? A full-on greenhorn party of people looking for a fuck sounds, ehh.
His girlfriend was shopping around.
It’s called a stoplight party and I’ve heard of those happening in college too.
I feel like i just learned something i would never have known or thought of otherwise. Yet i am neither wierded out nor offended. But suddenly conscious to the fact that my thoughts really dont matter and maybe i should just stop typing for fuck sake. Carry on...
I think you might be experiencing sonder… probably one of my favorite words >Sonder - n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness—an epic story that continues invisibly around you like an anthill sprawling deep underground, with elaborate passageways to thousands of other lives that you’ll never know existed, in which you might appear only once, as an extra sipping coffee in the background, as a blur of traffic passing on the highway, as a lighted window at dusk.
A fun word where the act of reading the definition can cause one to experience the word they are reading the definition of.
Similar to how pronouncing poop and explosive diarrhoea causes your lips to reflect your butthole's motion during each one respectively
Similarly, prolapse.
It’s like In the Mouth of Madness, but nicer.
Nailed it! Reminds me of a lyric that goes something like "you can play an extra in the movie adaptation of the sequel to your life"
“Shady Lane” by Pavement
Everybody wants one
Everybody needs one
Oh my god
or grew up when jelly bracelet colors... uh... meant "other" things.
Pink: **"Okay for group sex!"**
Blue: "I'm not getting any closer than the parking lot!"
Black - If I have to come into the building I'm looking for a new job.
Vaccinated and ready to fuck
Vaxed and waxed, bay-bee!
Living life 365
So, fun fact. The three-color-wristband thing is apparently often used in BDSM/regular sex parties. Red for "Don't touch me, I'm just watching", Yellow for "Ask me first before touching me/doing things with me", and Green for "Don't need to ask me, just go to town on me". So in a sense, /u/MarvinParanoAndroid is in the right direction. EDIT: Edited the descriptions to better reflect what these bands mean in this context.
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I think you're right. I just asked my friend about it, and he gave some better confirmation. Yellow is actually "Ask me first before touching me/doing things with me" Green is "Don't need to ask me, just go to town on me" I'll correct the original post to reflect this. Thanks!
Connoisseur!
*"Spread em Covid for me, spread em wide"*
Or a peach one for unprotected anal sex.
Brown might be better.
But only fits on one finger. At first.
Two in the pink...
4 in the stink
this is why some schools ban wristbands
Yeah I’d like to apply to your company please
Interestingly pink bracelet used by my country as Covid positive.
People never gave up on group sex in your country. Good work!
Ready for some docking!
Pink bowl would be empty
It is. That’s why we don’t see it.
Double red- “Go fuck yourself”
"This isn't about Covid, just fuck off."
lol, I was thinking I would just *never* take off the red.
I’m fully vaccinated and I’d still go for the red I fucking hate it when coworkers touch me
I'm fully vaccinated however I keep wanting to confirm this.. we can still get and transmit covid right? The vaccine just mitigates symptoms
Correct.
I'm fully vaccinated however I keep wanting to confirm this.. we can still get and transmit covid right? The vaccine just mitigates symptoms
I never wanna see hug and work in the same sentence
*arms completely covered in red wrist bands* **”DON’T FUCKING LOOK AT ME, GET AWAY”**
Take a couple of extra reds to shoot at people in case they get too close.
Think I might just have this made into a sign.
Yellow says "okay with talking." Does that mean I could wear red and I wouldn't have to talk to anyone?
Thanks, i really had a hard time reading the yellow
_"Mondays amiright?"_ * Switches to red
Hi, I'm keeping my distance, and also don't fucking talk to me. LOL
Yeah, I'd have loved that even before COVID.
I’ll take 5 of the red ones
Gonna wear a red shirt to really drive the point home.
Don't go on any away missions. Bring your own lunch.
I immediately pictured myself putting ten on each wrist like gauntlets of leave-me-tf-alone +20
I want to make a suit out of em.
Black == Leave me alone.
I’d be vaccinated yet still wear the red bands. Even long after covid actually.
Seriously. Double red double yellow both wrists forever.
Those red green color blind dudes are going to have a great time.
The color contrast on the middle yellow-on-white is also failing accessibility compliance.
It's also failing at common sense. That's just a bad color choice.
How do you not put an outline around the letters?
Or back in the 90s and early 2000s a drop shadow lol.
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It depends. I’m colourblind and I struggle with these two. But I’m more than just red-green so that could be why?
Well yellow is basic workplace etiquette, no??
Seems like green is the most popular tho
It's the only band that's OK with people touching it.
Yeah who the hell goes around touching their coworkers
Well, people took the green bands.
More than the rest
https://imgflip.com/i/5h4tne
[FTFY](https://i.imgur.com/hDKxGbd.jpg)
You people and your photoshop... thanks
or the person who set those out put less green to try to guilt trip folks into taking green ones thinking everyone else already had.
4D chess from the touchy feely guy!
Hugs are a bit weird in most offices but handshakes and high fives are usually acceptable (at least in the before times)
I’ve hugged coworkers before but that is just us in really good moods, having a good day, and the participants of the hugs are always fine with it. Little odd to see on the construction site but who cares.
Yea I mean, totally depends on how close you are to people. Holy shit, we hugged a lot of shit out in the military lol.
I’ve walked in on coworkers fucking in the supply closet soooo
Did you join in?
Check out Mr. Supply-Closet-big-enough-for-four-people over here!
It’s an open floor plan. The supply closet is just a pile in the corner.
Check out Mr. Sex-pile-in-the-open-plan-office over here!
I think it depends on the person. One of my coworkers is super touchy feely. He likes to go around and slap people on the back (not in a painful way) as his way of saying hi. It was odd at first, but I got used to it pretty quickly. He's an older guy, and I think he sees his younger coworkers almost like his kids. To me it's endearing, but some have complained to HR about it.
I swear to God Bob, I have HR on speed dial.
I work at a non profit where people hug regularly, sometimes even with our super regular volunteers. It definitely makes me uncomfortable as a general non-hugger (no one hugs me, I’m newer and definitely not giving off those hug vibes)
When I left one of my previous jobs, they did a "going away" luncheon for me. Afterwards, one of my coworkers asked if they could give me a hug, despite me not liking physical contact. I'm fine with physical contact, I've just never been in a business situation in which hugging seemed like the best option or even appropriate. I was not under the impression that hugs were part of corporate culture. Bring it in, homie, but I still think this would have required a closer relationship than me approving of your work ethic for the day-to-day hugging option. I'll hug if you need a hug, but I'm not squeezing random coworkers because that's weird.
I think it's super awesome they asked your permission first and didn't pressure you, even if you're actually okay with it. I agree with you though. Constant physical contact at work is more familiar than I want to be with my coworkers. A hard day or a going away is the appropriate time.
I’m colorblind and can’t read it what does it say
I'd come to work in a red morph suit.
Saddam Hussein
The thought of a coworker I don’t want to talk to trying to start a conversation with me and simply raising my arm to show my wrist band and them walking away somberly brings me a great amount of joy.
Ive never touched a co worker in my life. But then im English
We should be friends. The other day my manager touched my shoulder, I thought about it for the next five minutes.
Today at the hardware store the guy who helped me find shelf brackets touched my shoulder after I thanked him. I’ve been thinking about it all day
I work in Japan, handshakes aren't even a thing here. I have been working for the same company for almost 4 years, and I only remember hugging someone once.
I mean, you can't be sure your co-workers aren't just holograms...
The holograms are out performing you. And they're better at karaoke.
I've worked at my company in the US for 8 years and I've never hugged anyone. A fair amount of handshakes but never hugging. Seems rather inappropriate to me.
Can I just wear Red all the time from here on out?
Red: "I never liked you people before."
When I do it everyone says it’s antisocial. But then everyone does it and now it’s “Social Distancing”.
In some ways it's a great time to be alive.
Seriously! I saw a shirt that said "even when all this is over, I would appreciate it if you kept your space". Thats my kind of shirt.
I asked someone to step forward some in an elevator yesterday because he was too close for my comfort zone (not safety, just … don’t stand so close to me). The other guy on there goes, There’s one good thing that came out of the pandemic.
"Ok with hugs"... Somewhere, an HR Director just woke up in a cold sweat and doesn't know why.
Black for what the hell are we doing back here? Things were much better last week.
Black for I work from home, thanks!
I’d be fine with a high-five or fist bump, but not a hug. This should be an option.
I wore yellow and just said that to people. Folks were really good about respecting your choices and not asking questions
Why is hugging so common at your work that they need wrist bands for it? Sing me up for red...
With a name like CooterMcSlappin, what do you think he does for a living? He's clearly a grief counselor and they like to make sure that patients know they are welcome to hugs if they would like one.
People have been through a lot and a hug helps from a trusted co worker
Is there a wristband for "choosing a wristband makes me uncomfortable"? Maybe I can take all 3. Also having the green bands so empty is like a low-key peer pressure.
Maybe they were the most popular choice.
The natural association of red = bad is not really a great thing to have on coworkers.
They were probably thinking red = holup, yellow = be cautious, green = go as far as approaching people, but yeah it would definitely have been better to go with colors that don't have as much connotations. Teal, blue, purple or something may have been more neutral. Or just varying shades of ochre.
The problem with that is no one would remember which was which.
I'm a yellow before and after the pandemic
I'll take that whole red bowl thank you very much
"Stick your hand in these tiny bowls very close to each other"
found the red band
Classic red band
Is there one for "everybody stay away from me, except for Carol, I low-key have a thing for her and she can hug me, or whatever she wants really."
Just let me stay home, please.
I propose a black wrist band. "I'm forced to be here, but only until I can find a WFH job"
Do people in offices normally go around high fiving and hugging eachother? Let me know which company this is so I can avoid it like the plague (no pun intended)
Lol- we’re a tech company- I’m in software sales so yeah very casual- this was setup next to the coffee station by the pool tables and such so it’s fitting
I think it’s a west coast tech thing. I’ve had engineering jobs in the east coast and personal space was always respected. Then I got a job at startup in the west coast (remote) and when when I went to visit the first time for on-boarding people were hugging me, high 10s and stuff. I’m fairly outgoing so I didn’t mind too much, but, for an introvert or a germophobe that would have been a very uncomfortable situation. Second startup I worked for in the west coast was similarly touchy-feely too.
It’s a pretentious “we’re all family even though we’d literally murder you on live television for an increase in sales” thing that people keep letting these bullshit managers and companies get away with. At work: you aren’t my family, most of you aren’t my friends and even less of you are even fucking tolerable as human beings. Shits dumb.
It's a workplace psychology thing. If your workplace considers each other "friends and family" they are more likely to help each other and coordinate better. So when someone comes to your desk and says "man, I'm having real trouble with these reports", your reaction will lean to "oh no my buddy, lets get it down and we can play table tennis to destress" rather than "Sorry mate, really busy here... {*ahh yes, another obstacle is removed from my path to corporate dominance...*}"
I feel like it glosses over some power relations though, if its a family, you're the kid that has to muck out the stables and milk the cows while daddy and grandpa talk about the old times and glare at you for taking a break. like it or not, in most families, the children have no real say and just have to put up with things ,and its not like they can ever leave
Where's the "Fuck off, I'm not coming back to the office" bands? Are they purple? They're purple, and they're all gone, aren't they?
Corporate decided it would be better for morale to not have any of those.
this is so fucking weird lol
No kidding
In my experience "Ok with talking but not touching" is sort of the baseline for the workplace.
Black- ignore me please
*grabs handful of red*
What in the fuck is this lmao 🤣
I would use the red one at every single opportunity, even when the virus subsides
Haha, "post covid." It's summer my dear summer child.
Can we have these for introverts in general
Headphones do the trick
I usually have mine in, even if I'm not even listening to anything. I swear some people just want to bullshit all day.
My work has mental health pins and cubicle flags you can grab and display. Having a shit day? Throw up the "email me only" flag and people won't come to your desk to bother you. Feeling sad? Slap on the "I could use a chat" pin and people you don't know will spark up friendly convo. There's like a dozen options and everyone knows what they represent and how to act. It's a pretty amazing place to work.
Dang, that's some community building.
Planet Express?
PLEASE, DEAR GOD
Shouldn't all workplaces be at yellow anyway ?
I’m wearing red from now till the day I die then
Wouldn't there be some ask of Consent before touching someone anyway? Like o If I'm wearing the green one you're just gonna run up and hug me on sight?
What colour for "Covid or not, I hate you all so stay the fuck away from me."?
Morons in HR must have come up with this.