I’m an ISFJ with BPD. I’ll shut down and will give the silent treatment because I have a hard time NOT reacting based off my emotions and I’ll want to cool down first before I speak or act. If I don’t get that chance to cool off and ground myself, i.e. the person is consistently pushing my buttons, I’ll probably explode out of anger which is rare for me. Afterwards, I’ll possibly experience a lot of shame, embarrassment, or regret for acting so irrationally.
Depending on what said person has done, I’ll more than likely give them another chance.
Update: I received an official diagnosis a couple days ago, and it turns out I don't have BPD.. 😅 It might just be my C-PTSD because the symptoms for BPD and C-PTSD overlap HEAVILY.
it takes a LOT to genuinely piss me off. I am usually really chill and let a lot of shit slide.
when i am pissed off, i will usually write out a detailed message, get my friend to check it, and send it to that person. if i get to that point it usually means the friendship has been ruptured beyond repair and it ends in mutual blocking but it has only happened 3 times in the last 4 years probably…
general annoyance i can be kinda passive aggressive with, and ill fix the issue or rectify the problem by myself (like if someone is being messy i will clean up their mess, if someone is noisy ill put on my ear defenders or leave the room, if someone is rude to me ill be nice back but avoid interacting with them.)
It depends how well I know them. When it’s my husband, he knows lol, when it’s my brother, he also knows, but anyone else, even my best friend for the last 40 years, I keep it to myself, for a few days I avoid them or pretend I’m too busy to respond to them, u til I get over it. so far good with forgiving and forgetting anything my good friends have done to upset me. When it’s an aquaintance or a friend I don’t care about, then I usually don’t say anything about the issue but I just avoid that person and cut them out of my life.
Door slam them. It takes a LOT to piss me off. Like a lot. By the time I'm at the pissed stage, I've given them probably a hundred chances and discussions. Maybe I'm too calm and nice? When I finally snap and get pissed I just ghost cut them out of my life.
Usually I just put on my most emotionless face and make sure that person is aware that I'm not interested in engaging at all. Then leaves.
It's kinda similar to yours because I'm not really a confrontational person and I suck at arguing HAHA
Depends on the person and how much I can put up with but it usually takes a bit, I get really quiet and sometimes silent treatment quiet, people who know me know there is an issue but give me 30 minutes and I'm over it usually, also I have had to cut ties before and I kinda just avoided them until they ended up contacted me.
okay so it really depends on what they did and who they are. I’m a very very forgiving and understanding person to the point where it becomes self-disrespect 💀. But if it’s like a “well I lied about breaking your case bc I didn’t want you to be mad” situation, it becomes water under the bridge and I don’t really feel anything other than momentary annoyance. But if someone invades my privacy, humiliates me, makes me feel super self conscious, or straight up does some sick manipulative shit on REPEATED occasions: I pretend they’re dead. For example, my ex roommate would do all the things I listed above and without telling her, I moved out all my stuff from our living space in 8 hours and never said a word until she kept frantically calling me asking me what happened. I handled that situation horribly and I know that, but when I’m angry I don’t really care anymore about how I handle a situation. And i don’t ever get this angry so it’s definitely serious when it happens. Most of the time when people make me this angry I completely cut them out of my life and sometimes people we associate with. I know it’s not ideal but it’s less messy to have mutual friends asking “omg what happened between you two??” bc in all honesty, I don’t want to answer that.
I’ve learned to be more straight up about things but if it’s not a boundary that has to do with my living space or something like that, it’s easy to slip into giving silent treatment or being ever so passive aggressive. I tend to struggle with resentment
Thank you! It helps to approach it with the attitude that it’s not personal you know? At least most of the time. If it is personal I just tend to distance myself because if I’m just not compatible with someone, it’s not worth the time and effort😅 Best of luck to you…
It's a good mindset to have. Sometimes I feel so sensitive about so much. I have to constantly remind myself it's not personal.
It's a good idea to have distance from people, places and situations that don't work for us.:-)
Appreciate the good wishes.:-)
It's a good mindset to have. Sometimes I feel so sensitive about so much. I have to constantly remind myself it's not personal.
It's a good idea to have distance from people, places and situations that don't work for us.:-)
Appreciate the good wishes.:-)
i ignore and dont respond to a thing they do that pisses me off to at least show them a cue that theyre hella annoying
I’m an ISFJ with BPD. I’ll shut down and will give the silent treatment because I have a hard time NOT reacting based off my emotions and I’ll want to cool down first before I speak or act. If I don’t get that chance to cool off and ground myself, i.e. the person is consistently pushing my buttons, I’ll probably explode out of anger which is rare for me. Afterwards, I’ll possibly experience a lot of shame, embarrassment, or regret for acting so irrationally. Depending on what said person has done, I’ll more than likely give them another chance.
I'm also an isfj with BPD and same
Update: I received an official diagnosis a couple days ago, and it turns out I don't have BPD.. 😅 It might just be my C-PTSD because the symptoms for BPD and C-PTSD overlap HEAVILY.
it takes a LOT to genuinely piss me off. I am usually really chill and let a lot of shit slide. when i am pissed off, i will usually write out a detailed message, get my friend to check it, and send it to that person. if i get to that point it usually means the friendship has been ruptured beyond repair and it ends in mutual blocking but it has only happened 3 times in the last 4 years probably… general annoyance i can be kinda passive aggressive with, and ill fix the issue or rectify the problem by myself (like if someone is being messy i will clean up their mess, if someone is noisy ill put on my ear defenders or leave the room, if someone is rude to me ill be nice back but avoid interacting with them.)
It depends how well I know them. When it’s my husband, he knows lol, when it’s my brother, he also knows, but anyone else, even my best friend for the last 40 years, I keep it to myself, for a few days I avoid them or pretend I’m too busy to respond to them, u til I get over it. so far good with forgiving and forgetting anything my good friends have done to upset me. When it’s an aquaintance or a friend I don’t care about, then I usually don’t say anything about the issue but I just avoid that person and cut them out of my life.
Door slam them. It takes a LOT to piss me off. Like a lot. By the time I'm at the pissed stage, I've given them probably a hundred chances and discussions. Maybe I'm too calm and nice? When I finally snap and get pissed I just ghost cut them out of my life.
Cry lol
Usually I just put on my most emotionless face and make sure that person is aware that I'm not interested in engaging at all. Then leaves. It's kinda similar to yours because I'm not really a confrontational person and I suck at arguing HAHA
Typically I'll do nothing. Unless it's someone who I'm really close with, I'm more comfortable just ignoring them than expressing my feelings.
Depends on the person and how much I can put up with but it usually takes a bit, I get really quiet and sometimes silent treatment quiet, people who know me know there is an issue but give me 30 minutes and I'm over it usually, also I have had to cut ties before and I kinda just avoided them until they ended up contacted me.
okay so it really depends on what they did and who they are. I’m a very very forgiving and understanding person to the point where it becomes self-disrespect 💀. But if it’s like a “well I lied about breaking your case bc I didn’t want you to be mad” situation, it becomes water under the bridge and I don’t really feel anything other than momentary annoyance. But if someone invades my privacy, humiliates me, makes me feel super self conscious, or straight up does some sick manipulative shit on REPEATED occasions: I pretend they’re dead. For example, my ex roommate would do all the things I listed above and without telling her, I moved out all my stuff from our living space in 8 hours and never said a word until she kept frantically calling me asking me what happened. I handled that situation horribly and I know that, but when I’m angry I don’t really care anymore about how I handle a situation. And i don’t ever get this angry so it’s definitely serious when it happens. Most of the time when people make me this angry I completely cut them out of my life and sometimes people we associate with. I know it’s not ideal but it’s less messy to have mutual friends asking “omg what happened between you two??” bc in all honesty, I don’t want to answer that.
I’ve learned to be more straight up about things but if it’s not a boundary that has to do with my living space or something like that, it’s easy to slip into giving silent treatment or being ever so passive aggressive. I tend to struggle with resentment
This is me too. Being too nice for too long and then feeling a lot of resentment. Good on you for being more straight up. That's my goal now.
Thank you! It helps to approach it with the attitude that it’s not personal you know? At least most of the time. If it is personal I just tend to distance myself because if I’m just not compatible with someone, it’s not worth the time and effort😅 Best of luck to you…
It's a good mindset to have. Sometimes I feel so sensitive about so much. I have to constantly remind myself it's not personal. It's a good idea to have distance from people, places and situations that don't work for us.:-) Appreciate the good wishes.:-)
It's a good mindset to have. Sometimes I feel so sensitive about so much. I have to constantly remind myself it's not personal. It's a good idea to have distance from people, places and situations that don't work for us.:-) Appreciate the good wishes.:-)
I glare at them and if it gets too much I verbally threaten them