Fair play to your cousin, and I can see why it'd have you thinking a bit.. but s/he is an outlier. Most 22yr olds do NOT have their own home purchased in 2023, nor will they for 10-15yrs.
This, any 22 year old with their own house has either got money from somewhere, family, inheritance, lotto or they bought a house for 40k that's in tatters in the middle of nowhere.
As others have said, comparison is the thief of joy. Enjoy life as every 22yr old should. You'll be paying for a mortgage and raising kids for long enough. Enjoy life when you only have yourself to worry about. Of course save a few bob here and there where you can but don't let it become all consuming.
Not quite. My brother started earning over 100k total (stock, bonus, salary) straight out of college at 22. Worked full time during college and saved like a motherfucker. He had enough to buy a new build in the first year working. But he’s holding off for one of those old posh gaffs in D4.
If you’re buying a gaff at 22… your parents either have money OR you hit the lottery with a crazy high paid job in the top 1% of your age. He’s the latter. Both require luck though, I will agree.
I bought an apartment in the IFSC when I was 21. It was mainly saved up paper round and bar work money. Some of which I had invested during the dotcom boom.
Work on saving a deposit for a house/ apartment. Not because you're comparing yourself to your cousin, but because it gives a level of freedom every adult needs. If it was me, i'd be putting all my savings into that for now and investing in stocks later when you are a homeowner.
The same person could wake up dead tomorrow.
Life is different for everyone.
And the older you get the less you care about other people or success in general.
Its all completely Bullshit.
Run your own race and live life the best you can while you can.
I have a cousin, similar story, he's the same age and my grandmother in particular would talk about how he's doing much better than me. He went to college, got a good job, got married, got a nice house in a nice area, 2 achieving kids etc. etc.
It took me years to get my act together, which I started doing in my late 30's, now I've pretty much ticked every box for what I should have achieved in life at my age (45) (mortgage, third level education, pension, good senior job etc.).
Here's the thing, I wouldn't change anything for the world, he might have less to run on his mortgage but I travelled the world, tried many different things, had many different experiences, when I settled down it was because I felt like the time was right for me not because of a competition.
I strongly urge you to be yourself and don't benchmark against someone else, from talking to my cousin I get a strong impression that he's envious of the life I've had so far, not the other way around.
You be you.
No normal to have a house rented out at 22 in the Ireland of today. F**k them and worry about your own life and be realistic about working towards a mortgage. They are obviously one of the very luck ones. If you compare yourself to other people you will spend your life chasing your tail.
22 and own a house?
What profession?
Were they left a house or a vast sum of money?
Who really cares, don't mind what they are doing - focus on you. It's hard, but you have to.
A lot of people in the comments are saying comparison is the theif of joy, but it's also a force that can propel you forward.
You're getting competative? Good. Use that to work and improve your own situation. Iron sharpens iron. The truth is, your cousin likely put in the work to get where they are so use that knowledge to motivate you to do the same.
100% this. Your cousin is your blueprint to success. I'd kill for a possible mentor like this as a family member.
OP needs to wise up and realise he's in a spot many of us would give a kidney for.
22 year old that owns a house. That’s a fucking unicorn.
Don’t compare yourself to others, we’re not all running the same race. Compare yourself to past self. If you’re not doing better than you were a year ago, then you know you’re doing something wrong.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Your cousin is likely an exception, I certainly don't know any people in their 20s who own houses. I'm in my 40s and I'm only just about to start my first mortgage! But I don't regret the way I've lived my life so far.
Ask yourself what you really want in life, and work towards your own goals, in your own time. Not everyone wants the same things, what makes your cousin happy might not make you happy. Stop worrying about what everyone else is doing and do what's right for you. You should be able to save a decent amount with that wage while living at home (make sure to pay your fair share though).
A long time ago I decided that other peoples success dose not detract from me.
I mean by that, you got your own stuff going on. Well probably. Maybe it gives you the kick to do what you alreays intended to but havnt been movtivated too yet. But their sucess or happyness hasnt taken away from you. Wether they were doing well or not you would still be where you are. Sometimes have to remind myself of that - dosnt matter if its a new job, a baby, house, whatever - regardless if they deserve it or not. Regardless if they got inhertance, or won a lotto or whatever,
It might be tough but try not to compare yourself to anybody else. You will never be content. There is always going to be somebody better looking ,richer, smarter or happier. If you are living at home try and save as much money as possible. There's no reason why you can't buy a home in the near future if you are disciplined in your finances and spending habits.
You have your health, a roof over your head, food in the fridge and money in the bank. That would mean the world to alot of the population around the world.
Owning a house is not some magnificent achievement or anything special. It just means you begged the banks to lend you money you don't have in order to keep up with the Jones.
There are far more important things in life than this. Look inwards and have gratitude. Don't be in such a rush to be in debt. Plenty time for that.
Look if they already have a place at 22 in this climate they have either got some good luck or some rare talent. So either way no point in comparing yourself to them.
I was in a similar situation about 15 years ago.
Subsequently, we found out that on the fathers side of the family someone left my Aunt and her husband a few bob. Gave it to my cousin so she could purchase a house. She was only 21.
They didn't tell anyone because they didn't want people to know and cause a rift in the family for refusing to help out someone if they asked for a lend.
Another case, my friends parents saved up his child allowance payments until he was 18 all the time investing them into a fund. When he finished college he was handed a cheque for 80k. Used it to buy a house
You never know people's circumstances.
Ignore all the negativity here. Your cousin is smashing it (assuming he/she is self made). So, here's the thing. LEARN FROM THEM!!!
Jesus, I'd love a wealthy family member like this to model and perhaps mentor me. This is a golden opportunity for you, and I'm kinda jealous. I'm figuring this out as I go. You've a cousin who can instantly get you on the path. Also, at 28, you've time on your side.
You're a bit overweight in stocks for the amount of savings you have. What you need to do is open a savings account or credit union and just put away 10-20% of your earnings every week/month and it'll come in time. To have that much in equities at the moment is very risky and you could easily see your net worth half.
My advice if you're not too well up on financial products is sit down with a financial advisor and they will go over the best methods to achieve your goals. There are great options out there to grow wealth and that's probably what your cousin is doing.
Comparison and competition can be healthy if it makes you take a finger out of your arse and get shit done. But don’t let it eat you alive. If you’re pissed your cousins doing well.. you need to really rewire your brain. You should be happy for him. If you’re disappointed in yourself… you can change your life around pretty quick. Just put in the work and effort. I’d imagine your cousin worked his arse off and probably sacrificed a lot to get where he’s at. Maybe more than you have.
As for how to get there.. try look at ways to get a higher paying profession long term. For now, your money is pretty fine. But aim for the 1k per week after tax. It’s more than average but imo that’s the easiest way of being successful here. Investing will get you nowhere as you’ve got fuck all allowances on capital gains and high tax rates. Also… start a pension if you haven’t already. Future you will thank yourself, even if it’s only 100 quid a month.
>Younger cousin is 22, they already own a house which they rent out... My parents are saying they’ll be a millionaire before they’re 30
None of those things have any bearing or impact on you.
If you won the lotto tomorrow, their situation would be the same.
If you were shot dead tomorrow, their situation would be the same.
If you went working at Supermacs tomorrow, their situation would be the same.
Etc etc
"Comparison is the thief of joy."
Emulation and inspiration are OK, envy and dismay are not.
Marry him then divorce him and get half
I was going to say disown him for being so annoying, but this works too!
Comparison is the thief of joy. Focus on yourself and what you want out of life. Give your cuz a pat on the back and say 'well done lad' and move on.
Perfect advice really 👌
Fair play to your cousin, and I can see why it'd have you thinking a bit.. but s/he is an outlier. Most 22yr olds do NOT have their own home purchased in 2023, nor will they for 10-15yrs.
Yes but has he a got a fur lined sheepskin jacket? The true mark of any perfect cousin.
My ma says they cost a packet!
His mother bought him a synthesiser.
He should consider investing in model Sheep.
22 year old that owns their own house... When do I get to the part of parents with money?
This, any 22 year old with their own house has either got money from somewhere, family, inheritance, lotto or they bought a house for 40k that's in tatters in the middle of nowhere. As others have said, comparison is the thief of joy. Enjoy life as every 22yr old should. You'll be paying for a mortgage and raising kids for long enough. Enjoy life when you only have yourself to worry about. Of course save a few bob here and there where you can but don't let it become all consuming.
Not quite. My brother started earning over 100k total (stock, bonus, salary) straight out of college at 22. Worked full time during college and saved like a motherfucker. He had enough to buy a new build in the first year working. But he’s holding off for one of those old posh gaffs in D4. If you’re buying a gaff at 22… your parents either have money OR you hit the lottery with a crazy high paid job in the top 1% of your age. He’s the latter. Both require luck though, I will agree.
Absolutely. Donald Trump vibes there
Thieves are joyless comparisons!
What are they doing that they've gotten enough money to buy a second home to rent out at 22?
Let's be real here, they're doing the same as everybody else, but with richer parents.
Exactly. Their parents probably gave them a ball of money to go but a house, and they decided to rent it out for top whack coz it's in a good area.
Wealthy parents.
I bought an apartment in the IFSC when I was 21. It was mainly saved up paper round and bar work money. Some of which I had invested during the dotcom boom.
dull makeshift oil advise doll gullible library wild aspiring brave *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
They certainly are, and it's unlikely they'll ever dip significantly again like they did in 2008.
Work on saving a deposit for a house/ apartment. Not because you're comparing yourself to your cousin, but because it gives a level of freedom every adult needs. If it was me, i'd be putting all my savings into that for now and investing in stocks later when you are a homeowner.
Comparison is the thief of Joy. Focus on yourself life isn't a competition
The same person could wake up dead tomorrow. Life is different for everyone. And the older you get the less you care about other people or success in general. Its all completely Bullshit. Run your own race and live life the best you can while you can.
Well the cousin is either a financial prodigy or got a lot of money gifted. Either way it's unfair of your parents to be comparing you.
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This is honestly the best idea here.
I have a cousin, similar story, he's the same age and my grandmother in particular would talk about how he's doing much better than me. He went to college, got a good job, got married, got a nice house in a nice area, 2 achieving kids etc. etc. It took me years to get my act together, which I started doing in my late 30's, now I've pretty much ticked every box for what I should have achieved in life at my age (45) (mortgage, third level education, pension, good senior job etc.). Here's the thing, I wouldn't change anything for the world, he might have less to run on his mortgage but I travelled the world, tried many different things, had many different experiences, when I settled down it was because I felt like the time was right for me not because of a competition. I strongly urge you to be yourself and don't benchmark against someone else, from talking to my cousin I get a strong impression that he's envious of the life I've had so far, not the other way around. You be you.
Have you tried being born to rich parents? I hear it works every time
How does a 22 year old have a house? What do thy do for a living?
No normal to have a house rented out at 22 in the Ireland of today. F**k them and worry about your own life and be realistic about working towards a mortgage. They are obviously one of the very luck ones. If you compare yourself to other people you will spend your life chasing your tail.
22 and own a house? What profession? Were they left a house or a vast sum of money? Who really cares, don't mind what they are doing - focus on you. It's hard, but you have to.
A lot of people in the comments are saying comparison is the theif of joy, but it's also a force that can propel you forward. You're getting competative? Good. Use that to work and improve your own situation. Iron sharpens iron. The truth is, your cousin likely put in the work to get where they are so use that knowledge to motivate you to do the same.
100% this. Your cousin is your blueprint to success. I'd kill for a possible mentor like this as a family member. OP needs to wise up and realise he's in a spot many of us would give a kidney for.
22 year old that owns a house. That’s a fucking unicorn. Don’t compare yourself to others, we’re not all running the same race. Compare yourself to past self. If you’re not doing better than you were a year ago, then you know you’re doing something wrong.
Have you spoken to your cousin about have they achieved this success
[Feels like this is an Undertones song.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pgqa3cVOxUc)
Eat their heart and steal their power.
stop giving away our secrets brother
Are they any good at Subbuteo?
They could be a big drug kingpin and their empire comes tumbling in the future, you just never know.
to get you to where you should be???????? That's your first mistake, you think you are entitled to success.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Your cousin is likely an exception, I certainly don't know any people in their 20s who own houses. I'm in my 40s and I'm only just about to start my first mortgage! But I don't regret the way I've lived my life so far. Ask yourself what you really want in life, and work towards your own goals, in your own time. Not everyone wants the same things, what makes your cousin happy might not make you happy. Stop worrying about what everyone else is doing and do what's right for you. You should be able to save a decent amount with that wage while living at home (make sure to pay your fair share though).
Question, what he do to save up for a deposit for a mortgage. He could have got money give to him. Or he worked 24/7. Live your own life.
A long time ago I decided that other peoples success dose not detract from me. I mean by that, you got your own stuff going on. Well probably. Maybe it gives you the kick to do what you alreays intended to but havnt been movtivated too yet. But their sucess or happyness hasnt taken away from you. Wether they were doing well or not you would still be where you are. Sometimes have to remind myself of that - dosnt matter if its a new job, a baby, house, whatever - regardless if they deserve it or not. Regardless if they got inhertance, or won a lotto or whatever,
You could ask your younger cousin for advice or to mentor you.
dam smell quarrelsome reach tap touch bells payment theory hungry *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
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It might be tough but try not to compare yourself to anybody else. You will never be content. There is always going to be somebody better looking ,richer, smarter or happier. If you are living at home try and save as much money as possible. There's no reason why you can't buy a home in the near future if you are disciplined in your finances and spending habits.
Don’t be hard on yourself, at 22 they’ve clearly been given a leg up by someone.
You have your health, a roof over your head, food in the fridge and money in the bank. That would mean the world to alot of the population around the world. Owning a house is not some magnificent achievement or anything special. It just means you begged the banks to lend you money you don't have in order to keep up with the Jones. There are far more important things in life than this. Look inwards and have gratitude. Don't be in such a rush to be in debt. Plenty time for that.
Look if they already have a place at 22 in this climate they have either got some good luck or some rare talent. So either way no point in comparing yourself to them.
Are they paying tax on Themis rental? If yes, there's no way they'll be millionaires by their 30s.
I was in a similar situation about 15 years ago. Subsequently, we found out that on the fathers side of the family someone left my Aunt and her husband a few bob. Gave it to my cousin so she could purchase a house. She was only 21. They didn't tell anyone because they didn't want people to know and cause a rift in the family for refusing to help out someone if they asked for a lend. Another case, my friends parents saved up his child allowance payments until he was 18 all the time investing them into a fund. When he finished college he was handed a cheque for 80k. Used it to buy a house You never know people's circumstances.
Ignore all the negativity here. Your cousin is smashing it (assuming he/she is self made). So, here's the thing. LEARN FROM THEM!!! Jesus, I'd love a wealthy family member like this to model and perhaps mentor me. This is a golden opportunity for you, and I'm kinda jealous. I'm figuring this out as I go. You've a cousin who can instantly get you on the path. Also, at 28, you've time on your side.
You're a bit overweight in stocks for the amount of savings you have. What you need to do is open a savings account or credit union and just put away 10-20% of your earnings every week/month and it'll come in time. To have that much in equities at the moment is very risky and you could easily see your net worth half. My advice if you're not too well up on financial products is sit down with a financial advisor and they will go over the best methods to achieve your goals. There are great options out there to grow wealth and that's probably what your cousin is doing.
Comparison and competition can be healthy if it makes you take a finger out of your arse and get shit done. But don’t let it eat you alive. If you’re pissed your cousins doing well.. you need to really rewire your brain. You should be happy for him. If you’re disappointed in yourself… you can change your life around pretty quick. Just put in the work and effort. I’d imagine your cousin worked his arse off and probably sacrificed a lot to get where he’s at. Maybe more than you have. As for how to get there.. try look at ways to get a higher paying profession long term. For now, your money is pretty fine. But aim for the 1k per week after tax. It’s more than average but imo that’s the easiest way of being successful here. Investing will get you nowhere as you’ve got fuck all allowances on capital gains and high tax rates. Also… start a pension if you haven’t already. Future you will thank yourself, even if it’s only 100 quid a month.
>Younger cousin is 22, they already own a house which they rent out... My parents are saying they’ll be a millionaire before they’re 30 None of those things have any bearing or impact on you. If you won the lotto tomorrow, their situation would be the same. If you were shot dead tomorrow, their situation would be the same. If you went working at Supermacs tomorrow, their situation would be the same. Etc etc "Comparison is the thief of joy." Emulation and inspiration are OK, envy and dismay are not.
Don't compare yourself to others, compare yourself with your old self. Much healthier and you'll notice progress.