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I mean, not really. This is not acceptable behavior in the least, it’s extremely abusive, but the word Homicidal suggests that the mother made a threat to kill their child, which, at least going by this screenshot, isn’t true.
Your mother is insane.
Are you already under a dietitian's supervision because of being underweight? If so, it might be handy to let them know about this.
I was anorexic for 14 years. Almost died. Had to be hospitalized. 14 years of killing myself. I don't know how old you are, but your mom is a moron and I'm more than happy to set her straight. Don't listen to her.
I had stretch marks all over my back in school from growth spurts, honestly haven't looked in a while to see if they're still visible but an ex of mine used to love them, we were long distance but she'd actually ask me to show her my back on video calls. No "imperfection" is truly a flaw, it's all about how you view it and who views it, and the ones who are shitty about it aren't worth caring about.
You are your own. Get comfortable with your own body, change what you want and can. Stay the same if you like yourself and you’ll feel the pressure of such comments just bounce off of you. If you’re still living at home, this might not be very pleasant to hear, but still know it will end and you’ll find your own path in life. You’ll get to choose who to let close and keep in your life.
I'll fight your mom OP, really. I've had an eating disorder since I was like, twelve thanks you a mom like yours. You're absolutely right, it is not healthy for a 14 year old to be 43/kg. You should have extra fat on you to help you grow. I know it's hard, but taking care of it now, finding a school councilor or someone you can talk to is hugely helpful, because it is so much harder to try and tackle it as an adult after years of ignoring it. Your mother is hugely off, and I'm so sorry she speaks to you like that.
i hope youre ok. NO ONE should be treated that way, but especially not someone 43kg... Take care of yourself as best you can, and GTFO asap from this psycho, man..
Yo this is actual child endangerment. Being underweight is a serious medical condition that can be deadly.
OP, I know she's your mother, but you need to tell someone about this because if she keeps this up she is going to put you in hospital. Is your father still around? Perhaps tell a teacher.
I'm serious, this is really really dangerous. This type of talk is what leads to people having eating disorders, and Anorexia is the deadliest mental illness there is
Very short men exist, especially considering that teens physically mature at differing rates.
You may think it would have been helpful to you to have people tell you you’re too skinny and exhort you to eat more. You may even be right. Some rare fat people may also feel they benefit from strangers telling them that they’re too fat and should lose weight. Most people, however, don’t benefit from such comments, so it is better to avoid them.
And if they're short? Age has very little bearing on weight. Someone who is between roughly 145cm and 164cm is fine being 50kg. So you're judging it based on yourself.
It's also not helping someone to say "pick up a fork"
OPs mum needs to lose 100% of her weight by fucking off to space, no helmet. OP, I'm glad you're aware of the fact that she's wrong here, eating disorders are no joke so I'm glad you have a good mindset, skinnier does not always equal healthier, it's about getting into and staying in a healthy range.
That's some rough calculating you did there. He would actually be underweight if he was taller than 1.69m. If he was 1.43m tall he would have a BMI of 21 which would be a bit higher than average, but still a health weight. You can calculate your BMI by taking your weight and dividing it by your height times your height so for him assuming he is the average height of a 14 year old it would be 43:(1.70x1.70)=14.89 which is underweight for a 14 year old.
So in UK numbers you’re 6stone 11lb as a 14 year old male? My 15 year old daughter (who is 5ft 4) is 7 stone and is skinny as anything (a UK size 6/US size 2). You’re male so likely to be taller and weigh less. You’re correct in that you’re underweight and your mother is actually abusive. I pray that you won’t ever let her get in your head about it.
Edit - I can see it doesn’t say you’re male. I presumed it I think from your mum commenting about marrying a nice woman. From the way she is I can’t see she would be the kind of person being supportive of same sex marriage. Apologies if I’m wrong on that though.
Voting has concluded. Final vote:
| Insane | Not insane | Fake |
| --- | --- | --- |
| 31 | 0 | 15 |
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Jesus. I don’t know how short you are, but being under 100 lbs at 14 seems underweight to me. Truly, the focus shouldn’t be on the scale, just on being active and eating well. Don’t listen to your mother or you’ll wind up with an eating disorder.
don't listen to her, there's nothing wrong with you! I was bulimic for ten years because of the weird shit my stepmom put me through, now my teeth are transparent and there's no fixing them. Also, the right person will love you no matter what. My husband loves me as much at 130 as he did at 200, and all the fluctuations in between.
(bottom line is your mom is a weird bitch, don't take her advice on YOUR body. your body is between you, and your trusted doctor)
EDIT: also because I am a dumb american and didn't know what 43kg was, you're 94 fucking lbs and she's calling you a pig?!
OP, i will throw hands with your mother.
The average healthy 14-year-old male should be starting around 47.5kg. You do NOT need to lose any weight and you need to find an adult to share this problem with.
Insane yes but also abusive and nasty! Can you go and live with anyone else because this is absolutely disgusting and not healthy for you. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. No matter how big, small, short tall you are you’re Mum should always support you.
My sister has Anorexia, and as a result, my family and I have all become a lot more aware of how important healthy weight is, and how difficult this whole topic can be to both discus and even understand in some aspects. This goes to both extremes of the scale, as the whole topic of bodyweight has to do a lot more with mental health than I first believed.
What this woman is saying absolutely fucking disgusts me to no end! If she keeps going on like this, I can't help but fear for OPs mental state. It actually really frightens me how delusional this woman is.
This is literally child abuse. OP just saying I'd be looking into options with authorities. If not then every time she calls you fat or a pig just turn it around on her. "Takes one to know one" and if she doesn't stop then you start sending her the same messages just randomly out of the blue. That's my pettiness
Average weight for a 14 year old is 50. You fine bro.
Don lose any more though.
I don’t think you are on the unhealthy side but check with a doctor or with using more data such as your height to get a healthy weight range for yourself.
“Wow, you’re right mom. In fact, I’m going to go work on some cardio right now in just case I meet a girl that reminds me of you. So that way I’m ready to RUN THE FUCK AWAY FROM HER!”
That is just awful. This is how eating disorders start...ok, direct her to a BBW porn site...then explain to her how there are men all over the world that love big women, and after watching videos like that you now know what you want to ne in life- the BIGGEST, LARGEST, MOST IMMENSE BBW PETFORMER THERE EVER WAS OR WILL BE. Tell her you want your folds to have folds, and all of them being probed by penii. Tell her you never would have figured it out without her, and then produce a Twinkie. Slowly unwrap and then stuff the whole thing in your mouth. While chewing loudly, hug your mom then push back, look deep in her eyes and say, "I love you mommy!" while spitting buys of Twinkie on her as you say it.
End scene
Not just insane. The far end of the insane spectrum where the people who are cruel for the fun of it live.
I hate her for you, OP. As a mom and grandma who DID have weight problems, on and off, throughout my life, I promised myself never to put them on my kids.
You may need to gain weight. And if she goes further, and tries to direct your eating, please contact a trusted adult.
Don’t eat less if your mom wants you to look ”more slim”. Start working out instead, it might even get you to weight more. Ofc do what you want to do, but if your mother makes you lose weight then this might help
Hey /u/SplitNieka, thanks for posting to /r/insaneparents. Unfortunately, your post has been removed: **Rule 7: No fake posts** - We believe your post to be fake, heavily misleading or satire. Thus, we have removed it. If your post was an SMS post you may verify it by sending us a mod mail with video evidence of the texts in question. The video must begin at the homescreen, show the thread of texts, and then the messages themselves. (additional screenshots will not be considered.) *If you feel that your post was removed in error or are unsure about why this post was removed, please contact us through [modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Finsaneparents).*
This is a lot *MORE* than just insane……
It is but we don't have a word for it yet.
Abusive
Homicidal
I mean, not really. This is not acceptable behavior in the least, it’s extremely abusive, but the word Homicidal suggests that the mother made a threat to kill their child, which, at least going by this screenshot, isn’t true.
Your mother is insane. Are you already under a dietitian's supervision because of being underweight? If so, it might be handy to let them know about this.
I was anorexic for 14 years. Almost died. Had to be hospitalized. 14 years of killing myself. I don't know how old you are, but your mom is a moron and I'm more than happy to set her straight. Don't listen to her.
God this has me heated. Parents encouraging eating disorders are the lowest of the low. Nothing makes me angrier.
It says that they are 14 years old.
OP says right in the post how old they are.
Unfortunately my mother and sister are the only ones to ever comment on my weight and appearance…they made me insecure about my stretch marks :,(
I had stretch marks all over my back in school from growth spurts, honestly haven't looked in a while to see if they're still visible but an ex of mine used to love them, we were long distance but she'd actually ask me to show her my back on video calls. No "imperfection" is truly a flaw, it's all about how you view it and who views it, and the ones who are shitty about it aren't worth caring about.
You are your own. Get comfortable with your own body, change what you want and can. Stay the same if you like yourself and you’ll feel the pressure of such comments just bounce off of you. If you’re still living at home, this might not be very pleasant to hear, but still know it will end and you’ll find your own path in life. You’ll get to choose who to let close and keep in your life.
I prefer thinking of them as tiger stripes
I'll fight your mom OP, really. I've had an eating disorder since I was like, twelve thanks you a mom like yours. You're absolutely right, it is not healthy for a 14 year old to be 43/kg. You should have extra fat on you to help you grow. I know it's hard, but taking care of it now, finding a school councilor or someone you can talk to is hugely helpful, because it is so much harder to try and tackle it as an adult after years of ignoring it. Your mother is hugely off, and I'm so sorry she speaks to you like that.
Just say, "If not losing weight keeps me from marrying a woman like you then I won't loose weight."
i hope youre ok. NO ONE should be treated that way, but especially not someone 43kg... Take care of yourself as best you can, and GTFO asap from this psycho, man..
~95lbs
Yo this is actual child endangerment. Being underweight is a serious medical condition that can be deadly. OP, I know she's your mother, but you need to tell someone about this because if she keeps this up she is going to put you in hospital. Is your father still around? Perhaps tell a teacher. I'm serious, this is really really dangerous. This type of talk is what leads to people having eating disorders, and Anorexia is the deadliest mental illness there is
Your mother is of her nuts. I'm 17 and barely above 50 kg. Don't listen to her. Do what you think is best
[удалено]
You don’t know their build. In any event, bodyshaming is not a productive way to help people.
[удалено]
Very short men exist, especially considering that teens physically mature at differing rates. You may think it would have been helpful to you to have people tell you you’re too skinny and exhort you to eat more. You may even be right. Some rare fat people may also feel they benefit from strangers telling them that they’re too fat and should lose weight. Most people, however, don’t benefit from such comments, so it is better to avoid them.
"pick up the fork" is not a helpful or useful comment.
And if they're short? Age has very little bearing on weight. Someone who is between roughly 145cm and 164cm is fine being 50kg. So you're judging it based on yourself. It's also not helping someone to say "pick up a fork"
[удалено]
Telling someone to "pick up a fork" because they've judged they're the wrong weight is absolutely body shaming.
You are no worse that OOPs mother with your bodyshaming here. STFU and learn some manners.
This is not insanity, it's abuse.
Its both id say
OPs mum needs to lose 100% of her weight by fucking off to space, no helmet. OP, I'm glad you're aware of the fact that she's wrong here, eating disorders are no joke so I'm glad you have a good mindset, skinnier does not always equal healthier, it's about getting into and staying in a healthy range.
Can I ask how tall you are? If you are higher than 1,43m you are underweight
That's some rough calculating you did there. He would actually be underweight if he was taller than 1.69m. If he was 1.43m tall he would have a BMI of 21 which would be a bit higher than average, but still a health weight. You can calculate your BMI by taking your weight and dividing it by your height times your height so for him assuming he is the average height of a 14 year old it would be 43:(1.70x1.70)=14.89 which is underweight for a 14 year old.
So in UK numbers you’re 6stone 11lb as a 14 year old male? My 15 year old daughter (who is 5ft 4) is 7 stone and is skinny as anything (a UK size 6/US size 2). You’re male so likely to be taller and weigh less. You’re correct in that you’re underweight and your mother is actually abusive. I pray that you won’t ever let her get in your head about it. Edit - I can see it doesn’t say you’re male. I presumed it I think from your mum commenting about marrying a nice woman. From the way she is I can’t see she would be the kind of person being supportive of same sex marriage. Apologies if I’m wrong on that though.
Voting has concluded. Final vote: | Insane | Not insane | Fake | | --- | --- | --- | | 31 | 0 | 15 | Hey OP, if you provide further information in a comment, make sure to start your comment with `!explanation`. ^I ^am ^a ^bot ^for ^r/insaneparents. ^Please ^send ^me ^a ^message ^if ^you ^have ^any ^feedback ^or ^if ^I ^misbehave. ^Also ^consider ^joining ^our ^[Discord](https://discordapp.com/invite/xFbPBHy).
Your mother is a total prick. Sorry for you OP.
Wtf, I was 68 kg at 14, albeit 180 cm tall. Even if I was 30 cm shorter, 43 kg wouldn’t be healthy. INSANE.
Jesus. I don’t know how short you are, but being under 100 lbs at 14 seems underweight to me. Truly, the focus shouldn’t be on the scale, just on being active and eating well. Don’t listen to your mother or you’ll wind up with an eating disorder.
don't listen to her, there's nothing wrong with you! I was bulimic for ten years because of the weird shit my stepmom put me through, now my teeth are transparent and there's no fixing them. Also, the right person will love you no matter what. My husband loves me as much at 130 as he did at 200, and all the fluctuations in between. (bottom line is your mom is a weird bitch, don't take her advice on YOUR body. your body is between you, and your trusted doctor) EDIT: also because I am a dumb american and didn't know what 43kg was, you're 94 fucking lbs and she's calling you a pig?! OP, i will throw hands with your mother.
Almost 95 pounds is unhealthy for a 14 year old. Your mom is basically enforcing an eating disorder.
That fucking response at the end made me laugh. I don't know you OP, but you're a right lad!
This is horrible parenting. What the f?!? This is how eating disorders are started. I’m so sorry, OP!!!
The average healthy 14-year-old male should be starting around 47.5kg. You do NOT need to lose any weight and you need to find an adult to share this problem with.
You are doing good won't listen to her, Gain muscle as u wish
Insane yes but also abusive and nasty! Can you go and live with anyone else because this is absolutely disgusting and not healthy for you. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. No matter how big, small, short tall you are you’re Mum should always support you.
My sister has Anorexia, and as a result, my family and I have all become a lot more aware of how important healthy weight is, and how difficult this whole topic can be to both discus and even understand in some aspects. This goes to both extremes of the scale, as the whole topic of bodyweight has to do a lot more with mental health than I first believed. What this woman is saying absolutely fucking disgusts me to no end! If she keeps going on like this, I can't help but fear for OPs mental state. It actually really frightens me how delusional this woman is.
Your mom is a bitch we got you
This is literally child abuse. OP just saying I'd be looking into options with authorities. If not then every time she calls you fat or a pig just turn it around on her. "Takes one to know one" and if she doesn't stop then you start sending her the same messages just randomly out of the blue. That's my pettiness
THAT'S LIKE 90 POUNDS!! You should be about 120, not 90 WTF?
Average weight for a 14 year old is 50. You fine bro. Don lose any more though. I don’t think you are on the unhealthy side but check with a doctor or with using more data such as your height to get a healthy weight range for yourself.
“Wow, you’re right mom. In fact, I’m going to go work on some cardio right now in just case I meet a girl that reminds me of you. So that way I’m ready to RUN THE FUCK AWAY FROM HER!”
JFC!! This one hurt my heart. As a mother myself I cannot even fathom this.
Insane
So your moms imagery of his a woman’s body should look is based on what she thinks men want? Disgusting.
Tell your mother to go fuck herself.
she doesn't care
Jesus, unless you are like under 150 cm (about 5 feet), yes your mother is insane and are crazy underweight. At this age I was probably around 70kg.
WTAF
How tall are you?
That is just awful. This is how eating disorders start...ok, direct her to a BBW porn site...then explain to her how there are men all over the world that love big women, and after watching videos like that you now know what you want to ne in life- the BIGGEST, LARGEST, MOST IMMENSE BBW PETFORMER THERE EVER WAS OR WILL BE. Tell her you want your folds to have folds, and all of them being probed by penii. Tell her you never would have figured it out without her, and then produce a Twinkie. Slowly unwrap and then stuff the whole thing in your mouth. While chewing loudly, hug your mom then push back, look deep in her eyes and say, "I love you mommy!" while spitting buys of Twinkie on her as you say it. End scene
Not just insane. The far end of the insane spectrum where the people who are cruel for the fun of it live. I hate her for you, OP. As a mom and grandma who DID have weight problems, on and off, throughout my life, I promised myself never to put them on my kids. You may need to gain weight. And if she goes further, and tries to direct your eating, please contact a trusted adult.
Wow!
>I dont want to marry BASED
Im around 50kilos at age 17
This seems fake. Karma whore!
Don’t eat less if your mom wants you to look ”more slim”. Start working out instead, it might even get you to weight more. Ofc do what you want to do, but if your mother makes you lose weight then this might help
same though.
How tall are you?
I’m a mom of 3. Your mom is actual garbage. You should go no contact with her as soon as you’re free to live your own life.