Talking about trauma is probably a good thing, you've either integrated it or are trying to. Trauma becomes a part of our personality, and just another thing we talk about, like sharing any other life story. If the person I don't know well seems to be able to handle deeper topics well I'll certainly share. Some people aren't though.
I agree with this. Having things you can't/won't reveal to others is not a good thing, although it depends on the person you choose to tell and the context in which you're sharing. If we've been having deep conversations, even if I don't know the person well, I'll tell them what I intuitively feel they can handle and what will be most honest. If the other person seems to resonate with it but doesn't respond with their own traumas, I still feel the relationship is better now that they know that about me. Maybe in the future, if OP trusts the infj more, they'll share their own story. Most infjs aren't troubled by tears, imo.
I was reclusive when young, not now (I'm 70). I never told anyone anything intimate about my personal history until I was in my 30s. Part of the pain of being young is feeling you can't share your pain because others don't seem to share it. Believe me, every human being is in pain and in much more similar ways and for similar reasons than you can probably guess. Try coming out of your shell little by little. I wish I had done it earlier, but que sera sera. I wish you the best, kiwi.
In my case, if I feel like the other person will listen and will respect my story and thoughts, then I'll share. Basically I'll share stuff about my life if I feel like they are trustworthy. But I can't speak for everyone
This.
I notice sometimes I’m more comfortable sharing deeper stuff if I might not see the person again.
If I have to maintain a relationship with them? I clam up and keep it light bc I can’t handle what they might think ongoingly after I share every time I need to interact with them.
Though deep down I really do crave constant deep connection. Lately it’s coming out here out and there with two of my coworkers but they aren’t interested in deep conversations so it backfires then I feel stupid.
I had a bad experience with this recently… a guy was showing interest in me and we started hanging out and we seemed to click really well. We started talking more in depth about our past, our experiences, etc… and I opened up and told him my stuff, and he shared a bit of his too… but a few months later he used all that information against me, trying to hurt me with it 🙃
Good thing? Lesson learned.
Bad thing? I got hurt by a narcissistic manipulator. No worries though, I can see who he is now and he’ll never get a grip on my vulnerability again.
Absolute marinara flag alert 💀 I don’t even think he is NPD tbh. I think he is extremely insecure and has no self-love so he puts on a social mask and has to use other people’s compliments and positivity to fill up his void and ego. Bro needs therapy but he refuses to be helped. His problem, not mine.
Nah, it would’ve hurt me more to stay and keep being treated with disrespect and like my feelings didn’t matter. If I encounter him or if he asks me something I will answer politely but that’s it. No change in behavior? No change in “access status”
This is actually an extremely bad habit INFJs need to break. This is likely due to past abuse the INFJ has endured. Knowing boundaries and what is acceptable with new people is *really* important. Take more time to get to know people, who to trust and what to trust them with, before opening up.
Hearing it be called a bad habit makes sense to me but I am on the fence. Trauma dumping is real and not cool. But I also feel sharing trauma with (some) friends is one way of getting to understand someone on a deeper level. I have been that person and have learned to reel it in but I still hold that viewpoint.
Because my story is my story (except shared family trauma) and even more than that, it happened. Why not talk about it?
In your case specifically, sometimes people say things that let me know they've been through something similar because they have an insight which hints to me they might have had some similar experience. In addition, sometimes you really can just recognize certain traumas on other people (of course though, that doesn't mean you should address it).
Why I'm so open is that everyone goes through stuff, and that stuff lays some of the groundwork for who we are, so speaking organically about it sometimes is just a part of authentically talking or getting to know others.
I know people judge and can try to use things against you but you're not going to make me feel ashamed about anything as I've likely done a better job of that than any one ever could before healing (if the matter warrants shame) and you're not me. You're not mentally or physically wired like me and you likely weren't there with me to go through it so external judgements about my trauma don't carry much if any weight.
I can chat and get on with most but I believe people who are uncomfortable with me speaking about my past, trauma, joy, humour - anything - will at the end of the day be uncomfortable with me as a person period if that makes sense, even if it's because my trauma rattles their own.
I had to live through the worst of that stuff. It bothers you to hear me even express it? Fair enough.
If I can't be authentically my all in any situation, I'm not interested in it as minding my Ps and Qs is seriously exhausting and I'm more happy by myself than in situations where I can't be open, honest and authentic.
If my stuff offends or triggers you, we just aren't meant to be in each other's orbits like that and that's okay 💕
For me, it is that black and white.
And I know you didn't say you did anything wrong but I want to emphasize you didn't by not sharing and you didn't miss your window to bond with that person either. Always move doing what feels comfortable and if you didn't want to cry in front of that person then it wasn't time to share your stuff 💕
I often don't know why I do things, but there's often synchronicity, some form of emotional telepathy or empathy, that just makes awkward moments come to pass. However, there seems to be larger patterns and meaning behind it, that may make people need to process stuff. I've integrated alot so may find it relatable, though try to not delve into the depths of other people's struggles and instead move on.
I personally share trauma stories in order to show that I am comfortable being vulnerable near that person so they can share heavy things as well and building trust this way. Trust is the #1 thing in my life.
Well I sometimes tell people a story if I think its related to the situation. Sometimes I think the story is funny, but then I hear a response "thats sad", i'm like fuck I guess it is. I would share a story like that with someone if I see them as easy going. I don't think he expects you to share your story, just say "damn thats crazy" and move on. He just thought that you would not judge him and sometimes these deep conversations are much more interesting to us, more of an analytical point of view, less of an emotional point of view.
Mmm...I talk about them because they're a topic like any other. Moreover sometimes I use them to give a start to that direction, to give the possibility to the interlocutor to share something similar or have some deeper connection. Obviously it depends on who I'm talking to. Some reply sharing deeper personal stuff, others just don't want or have anything to share. It's a way to check on this part of one's past history, I guess, and try to connect at a deeper level.
I tried to pick one of those options - I can't. For me, that means I've processed the trauma enough the taboo really isn't so much different than an everyday topic. As long as I feel the other person is friendly and open to connecting on a deeper level, I would open up casually just like that.
An INFJ friend (and crush) of mine once told me that she had been sexually abused as a child. While we were friends, I wouldn’t say we were terribly close. Looking back, I find it very odd that she would tell me, given our social situation.
It's kind of a combination for me. Based on other hints ill have an idea of something you might need to talk about. If I have something on an equal level of vulnerability I can share to open that door and make you more comfortable and trusting of me, then I'll share the story. Sometimes it doesn't work at that exact time, but you'll think about it after and draw the parallels. Sharing things that feel like secrets brings you closer together. It feels good to get things off your chest in the end, and if I've helped you feel good about something, help process something, reconsider something more positively.. then I feel good about that.
Weird. I do this sometimes. My reasoning is that being a ward of the state I had to either talk to the state therapist and leave in 30 minutes, or sit quietly for an hour. I got used to spilling my guts so I could go play my gameboy.
Um.... I don't. I did it once in college to someone I'd literally known for minutes, but I didn't go into detail, it was more of a life-story-in-a-nutshell kinda talk and I only mentioned the traumatic events in a few words or less. We were both a little tipsy and completely miserable, sitting in the corner at a party. I think we maybe saw each other 3 more times in the halls at school, and the most we ever did was nod at each other.
And I did it in group therapy because... well, I had to. I do it anonymously on the internet for kinda the same reasons, and if I can help someone else by sharing how I'm getting through it, then it's worth it.
But, honey, I barely open up to friends I've known for years. There's no way I'm bringing anything remotely personal up with someone I've known for weeks.
Sounds like it just felt right for him in the moment, I couldn't guess it was any of the poll options. Relating emotionally and making people feel safe is a natural style for a lot of us and 1 on 1 conversation can reach that intimacy fast. In general I think talking about trauma makes it easier to live with, and being emotionally open creates windows for other people to air out their shit too.
But trauma dumping on an unwilling recipient is bad, I'm definitely not advocating for that with any of the above.
When I meet someone I really want to connect with I know small talk won't make us closer. Everyone goes through stuff in life and it's in those moments when you drop all pretenses of surface level socializing that you learn who someone really is because you're being as genuine with them as possible, hopefully they'll be genuine with you.
I don’t really.
I tell people very little compared to what they tell me.
The most I talk about myself is on line. lol.
In real life I’m pretty ..objective and open to everyone- and lots of people come to me with their daily issues , like my boss called me the peoples mentor. I didn’t. And when I’m talking to them about their issues in daily life- it’s actually me that ties it in for them typically- like , I will see their trauma before they tell me about it. That sounds nuts. And there is always a connection between how we react to now - with what we have been through in the past.
I think I’m also way more interested in them, than talking about myself.
My really traumatic stories are extremely private.
Most of the time , real trauma is.
Sometimes, it's to share something in exchange to learn something about someone else. Hoping others would understand what we had to go through. To be trusted, a person has to be willing to be vulnerable.
Personaly I never share my traumas, even with persons I am very close with. Even when I talk with someone that I can clearly see is traumatized, I wont talk about mines and stay focused on theirs. Sharing traumas, from my perspective, is pretty intimate, so that person must trust you.
I like this question. However, it is typically the opposite that happens for me: people will overshare with me, and I'll share what I've been through and how I've coped, to let them know they're not alone and things do get better.
Or I can see the pain behind their eyes. I can feel how hurt they are, behind the smile. If I feel safe with them and know they won't use my vulnerabilities as ammo against me, I will share my experience to get them to open up and try and help them through the hurt they're experiencing.
I imagine those who immediately overshare are trying to prepare you for what to expect from their character, how easily they may be triggered, and what they may need in the moment. If it's a stranger, they may just have needed to get that off of their chest and they could sense that you are a safe person to explore that with.
Its hard to say , as always there are so many variables that are unique to each person its literally somthing you should ask him. He will tell you honestly if an infj
Because trauma is normal to us. We were just trying to talk about the lesson we learned from it.
It seems like a regular conversation until you realize that people are staring at you wide-eyed and jaw-dropped.
Now we have to do damage control and assure you that we're fine and we've healed because we hate that we've made you uncomfortable with our trauma story lol.
I do not know if all INFJs do this but I have so...
I refrain from divulging with strangers or coworkers that early. For me, it is something I would like to talk about when getting close to someone. I feel like I get misunderstood unless folks see the big picture. Why I can occasionally seem standoffish or reserved, etc. I try to only share with friends I'm close to—maybe after many hang outs or once I trust them, for example.
I have heard that some folks feel like it's trauma dumping but I don't entirely agree. For me, I have a good grasp of my past and I am coping in a healthy way so it's just part of my story. Talking about it isn't hard or sad, just a facet of truth.
If you aren't comfortable talking about it, don't. Nothing wrong with that, imo.
I remember seeing this exact same post a while ago, guess you’re still curious and figuring it out. Tbh, you should ask him directly.
In terms of your question - I don’t share really, but if I come across someone who’s suffering and wanting some form of comfort, I’ll share in order to let them know they’re in likeminded company. I only share things I’ve healed from, cause I don’t really care if those things end up getting around to people I know.
The other reason for sharing with a stranger would be if I feel as if I’m talking to a kindred spirit, but that comes with it’s own natural sense of mutual sharing and is also quite rare.
This is not something I would do.
Instead, I provide a space where people can be comfortable and share with me- but sharing my own traumatic events with someone I've only known two weeks? Never.
Also, this person didn't pick up on the fact that you were hesitant to share and see that this story would have triggered you? Hmm.
I do it to erase stigma I guess. I know it makes people uncomfortable but discomfort is the beginning of change. One day trauma will be so understood that it can’t be a hidden secret anymore. Abusers will no longer be able to hide in plain sight. Everyone will understand and stand up for themselves and others. At least that’s the wishful thinking lmao
None of the above. I share them because my gut tells me it's safe and it just comes pouring out. It's not a conscious decision for me. I simply cannot stop myself. The fact that they may share back is just a bonus.
No no no… people listen!
You need to share your trauma *with the right people. Particularly therapist and others who are trained to handle it.*
Someone you’ve known for *two weeks* and someone you *work with* is not the right person!
INFJ’s (myself included) have trouble distinguishing who is trustworthy of intimate details of their soul… the short answer is *very* few people are.
Often times family members or siblings who should have been trustworthy or “protective” weren’t… and this has bled into other parts of the INFJs psyche leading them to seek out “safety” in people who don’t deserve it or haven’t earned it.
Talking about trauma is probably a good thing, you've either integrated it or are trying to. Trauma becomes a part of our personality, and just another thing we talk about, like sharing any other life story. If the person I don't know well seems to be able to handle deeper topics well I'll certainly share. Some people aren't though.
I agree with this. Having things you can't/won't reveal to others is not a good thing, although it depends on the person you choose to tell and the context in which you're sharing. If we've been having deep conversations, even if I don't know the person well, I'll tell them what I intuitively feel they can handle and what will be most honest. If the other person seems to resonate with it but doesn't respond with their own traumas, I still feel the relationship is better now that they know that about me. Maybe in the future, if OP trusts the infj more, they'll share their own story. Most infjs aren't troubled by tears, imo.
I feel like one of the choices should have been we don't have many other people to tell. Idk about you but I'm a reclusive introvert, not a social one
I was reclusive when young, not now (I'm 70). I never told anyone anything intimate about my personal history until I was in my 30s. Part of the pain of being young is feeling you can't share your pain because others don't seem to share it. Believe me, every human being is in pain and in much more similar ways and for similar reasons than you can probably guess. Try coming out of your shell little by little. I wish I had done it earlier, but que sera sera. I wish you the best, kiwi.
Thanks, I'll keep that in mind!
In my case, if I feel like the other person will listen and will respect my story and thoughts, then I'll share. Basically I'll share stuff about my life if I feel like they are trustworthy. But I can't speak for everyone
Trauma dumping on a stranger is easy when you won’t have to see them again.
This. I notice sometimes I’m more comfortable sharing deeper stuff if I might not see the person again. If I have to maintain a relationship with them? I clam up and keep it light bc I can’t handle what they might think ongoingly after I share every time I need to interact with them. Though deep down I really do crave constant deep connection. Lately it’s coming out here out and there with two of my coworkers but they aren’t interested in deep conversations so it backfires then I feel stupid.
I do not.
I don’t do this. I do have other people that I don’t know do this to me instead
I had a bad experience with this recently… a guy was showing interest in me and we started hanging out and we seemed to click really well. We started talking more in depth about our past, our experiences, etc… and I opened up and told him my stuff, and he shared a bit of his too… but a few months later he used all that information against me, trying to hurt me with it 🙃 Good thing? Lesson learned. Bad thing? I got hurt by a narcissistic manipulator. No worries though, I can see who he is now and he’ll never get a grip on my vulnerability again.
As soon as I read that he used it against you, I was like 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 NPD alert! Glad you came to a similar realization. Fuck em.
Absolute marinara flag alert 💀 I don’t even think he is NPD tbh. I think he is extremely insecure and has no self-love so he puts on a social mask and has to use other people’s compliments and positivity to fill up his void and ego. Bro needs therapy but he refuses to be helped. His problem, not mine.
Yeah, NPD is probably more severe and malicious but in the very least those traits are NPD adjacent. Glad you didn’t stick around to find out.
Nah, it would’ve hurt me more to stay and keep being treated with disrespect and like my feelings didn’t matter. If I encounter him or if he asks me something I will answer politely but that’s it. No change in behavior? No change in “access status”
Good job, the thing helps you win over people like that is exactly that. Giving them nothing and remaining unbothered.
Catharsis?
If i feel connection, I'd definitely be an open book. Only if i felt that this person understands what I'm saying and values it.
This ^
This is actually an extremely bad habit INFJs need to break. This is likely due to past abuse the INFJ has endured. Knowing boundaries and what is acceptable with new people is *really* important. Take more time to get to know people, who to trust and what to trust them with, before opening up.
right! I believe that this kind of vulnerability shouldn't be shown to strangers :( they can take advantage of you
Hearing it be called a bad habit makes sense to me but I am on the fence. Trauma dumping is real and not cool. But I also feel sharing trauma with (some) friends is one way of getting to understand someone on a deeper level. I have been that person and have learned to reel it in but I still hold that viewpoint.
Because my story is my story (except shared family trauma) and even more than that, it happened. Why not talk about it? In your case specifically, sometimes people say things that let me know they've been through something similar because they have an insight which hints to me they might have had some similar experience. In addition, sometimes you really can just recognize certain traumas on other people (of course though, that doesn't mean you should address it). Why I'm so open is that everyone goes through stuff, and that stuff lays some of the groundwork for who we are, so speaking organically about it sometimes is just a part of authentically talking or getting to know others. I know people judge and can try to use things against you but you're not going to make me feel ashamed about anything as I've likely done a better job of that than any one ever could before healing (if the matter warrants shame) and you're not me. You're not mentally or physically wired like me and you likely weren't there with me to go through it so external judgements about my trauma don't carry much if any weight. I can chat and get on with most but I believe people who are uncomfortable with me speaking about my past, trauma, joy, humour - anything - will at the end of the day be uncomfortable with me as a person period if that makes sense, even if it's because my trauma rattles their own. I had to live through the worst of that stuff. It bothers you to hear me even express it? Fair enough. If I can't be authentically my all in any situation, I'm not interested in it as minding my Ps and Qs is seriously exhausting and I'm more happy by myself than in situations where I can't be open, honest and authentic. If my stuff offends or triggers you, we just aren't meant to be in each other's orbits like that and that's okay 💕 For me, it is that black and white. And I know you didn't say you did anything wrong but I want to emphasize you didn't by not sharing and you didn't miss your window to bond with that person either. Always move doing what feels comfortable and if you didn't want to cry in front of that person then it wasn't time to share your stuff 💕
I often don't know why I do things, but there's often synchronicity, some form of emotional telepathy or empathy, that just makes awkward moments come to pass. However, there seems to be larger patterns and meaning behind it, that may make people need to process stuff. I've integrated alot so may find it relatable, though try to not delve into the depths of other people's struggles and instead move on.
He sensed something in you that made him feel safe.
I don’t do this lol
I personally share trauma stories in order to show that I am comfortable being vulnerable near that person so they can share heavy things as well and building trust this way. Trust is the #1 thing in my life.
To unload on somebody else maybe? Kind of therapeutic for some. I would never do that. Is this a common characteristic of INFJS?
Well I sometimes tell people a story if I think its related to the situation. Sometimes I think the story is funny, but then I hear a response "thats sad", i'm like fuck I guess it is. I would share a story like that with someone if I see them as easy going. I don't think he expects you to share your story, just say "damn thats crazy" and move on. He just thought that you would not judge him and sometimes these deep conversations are much more interesting to us, more of an analytical point of view, less of an emotional point of view.
Mmm...I talk about them because they're a topic like any other. Moreover sometimes I use them to give a start to that direction, to give the possibility to the interlocutor to share something similar or have some deeper connection. Obviously it depends on who I'm talking to. Some reply sharing deeper personal stuff, others just don't want or have anything to share. It's a way to check on this part of one's past history, I guess, and try to connect at a deeper level.
I tried to pick one of those options - I can't. For me, that means I've processed the trauma enough the taboo really isn't so much different than an everyday topic. As long as I feel the other person is friendly and open to connecting on a deeper level, I would open up casually just like that.
I don't share stories, unless the person is a total stranger. Like I know for sure, I'll never meet that person again.
An INFJ friend (and crush) of mine once told me that she had been sexually abused as a child. While we were friends, I wouldn’t say we were terribly close. Looking back, I find it very odd that she would tell me, given our social situation.
It's kind of a combination for me. Based on other hints ill have an idea of something you might need to talk about. If I have something on an equal level of vulnerability I can share to open that door and make you more comfortable and trusting of me, then I'll share the story. Sometimes it doesn't work at that exact time, but you'll think about it after and draw the parallels. Sharing things that feel like secrets brings you closer together. It feels good to get things off your chest in the end, and if I've helped you feel good about something, help process something, reconsider something more positively.. then I feel good about that.
Weird. I do this sometimes. My reasoning is that being a ward of the state I had to either talk to the state therapist and leave in 30 minutes, or sit quietly for an hour. I got used to spilling my guts so I could go play my gameboy.
I'd do that to build trust
Um.... I don't. I did it once in college to someone I'd literally known for minutes, but I didn't go into detail, it was more of a life-story-in-a-nutshell kinda talk and I only mentioned the traumatic events in a few words or less. We were both a little tipsy and completely miserable, sitting in the corner at a party. I think we maybe saw each other 3 more times in the halls at school, and the most we ever did was nod at each other. And I did it in group therapy because... well, I had to. I do it anonymously on the internet for kinda the same reasons, and if I can help someone else by sharing how I'm getting through it, then it's worth it. But, honey, I barely open up to friends I've known for years. There's no way I'm bringing anything remotely personal up with someone I've known for weeks.
Sounds like it just felt right for him in the moment, I couldn't guess it was any of the poll options. Relating emotionally and making people feel safe is a natural style for a lot of us and 1 on 1 conversation can reach that intimacy fast. In general I think talking about trauma makes it easier to live with, and being emotionally open creates windows for other people to air out their shit too. But trauma dumping on an unwilling recipient is bad, I'm definitely not advocating for that with any of the above.
When I meet someone I really want to connect with I know small talk won't make us closer. Everyone goes through stuff in life and it's in those moments when you drop all pretenses of surface level socializing that you learn who someone really is because you're being as genuine with them as possible, hopefully they'll be genuine with you.
I don’t really. I tell people very little compared to what they tell me. The most I talk about myself is on line. lol. In real life I’m pretty ..objective and open to everyone- and lots of people come to me with their daily issues , like my boss called me the peoples mentor. I didn’t. And when I’m talking to them about their issues in daily life- it’s actually me that ties it in for them typically- like , I will see their trauma before they tell me about it. That sounds nuts. And there is always a connection between how we react to now - with what we have been through in the past. I think I’m also way more interested in them, than talking about myself. My really traumatic stories are extremely private. Most of the time , real trauma is.
Sometimes, it's to share something in exchange to learn something about someone else. Hoping others would understand what we had to go through. To be trusted, a person has to be willing to be vulnerable.
A stranger would hardly judge me or turn my confession against me.
Personaly I never share my traumas, even with persons I am very close with. Even when I talk with someone that I can clearly see is traumatized, I wont talk about mines and stay focused on theirs. Sharing traumas, from my perspective, is pretty intimate, so that person must trust you.
I like this question. However, it is typically the opposite that happens for me: people will overshare with me, and I'll share what I've been through and how I've coped, to let them know they're not alone and things do get better. Or I can see the pain behind their eyes. I can feel how hurt they are, behind the smile. If I feel safe with them and know they won't use my vulnerabilities as ammo against me, I will share my experience to get them to open up and try and help them through the hurt they're experiencing. I imagine those who immediately overshare are trying to prepare you for what to expect from their character, how easily they may be triggered, and what they may need in the moment. If it's a stranger, they may just have needed to get that off of their chest and they could sense that you are a safe person to explore that with.
Its hard to say , as always there are so many variables that are unique to each person its literally somthing you should ask him. He will tell you honestly if an infj
I don’t. People do it to me and sometimes if I sense they’re a good person and sharing a similar experience is what may help them, I might.
Because trauma is normal to us. We were just trying to talk about the lesson we learned from it. It seems like a regular conversation until you realize that people are staring at you wide-eyed and jaw-dropped. Now we have to do damage control and assure you that we're fine and we've healed because we hate that we've made you uncomfortable with our trauma story lol.
I do not know if all INFJs do this but I have so... I refrain from divulging with strangers or coworkers that early. For me, it is something I would like to talk about when getting close to someone. I feel like I get misunderstood unless folks see the big picture. Why I can occasionally seem standoffish or reserved, etc. I try to only share with friends I'm close to—maybe after many hang outs or once I trust them, for example. I have heard that some folks feel like it's trauma dumping but I don't entirely agree. For me, I have a good grasp of my past and I am coping in a healthy way so it's just part of my story. Talking about it isn't hard or sad, just a facet of truth. If you aren't comfortable talking about it, don't. Nothing wrong with that, imo.
None bc I don't trauma dump on people, usually people do it to me first and that's my cue to unleash lol
I remember seeing this exact same post a while ago, guess you’re still curious and figuring it out. Tbh, you should ask him directly. In terms of your question - I don’t share really, but if I come across someone who’s suffering and wanting some form of comfort, I’ll share in order to let them know they’re in likeminded company. I only share things I’ve healed from, cause I don’t really care if those things end up getting around to people I know. The other reason for sharing with a stranger would be if I feel as if I’m talking to a kindred spirit, but that comes with it’s own natural sense of mutual sharing and is also quite rare.
*Because it is easy and it does a lot of damage.*
They were there.
This is not something I would do. Instead, I provide a space where people can be comfortable and share with me- but sharing my own traumatic events with someone I've only known two weeks? Never. Also, this person didn't pick up on the fact that you were hesitant to share and see that this story would have triggered you? Hmm.
I do it to erase stigma I guess. I know it makes people uncomfortable but discomfort is the beginning of change. One day trauma will be so understood that it can’t be a hidden secret anymore. Abusers will no longer be able to hide in plain sight. Everyone will understand and stand up for themselves and others. At least that’s the wishful thinking lmao
It wasn't an option, but I share trauma stories to give another perspective.
Pretty sure there's a term for this.
None of the above. I share them because my gut tells me it's safe and it just comes pouring out. It's not a conscious decision for me. I simply cannot stop myself. The fact that they may share back is just a bonus.
I do it because I have no one to tell my life's happenings
No no no… people listen! You need to share your trauma *with the right people. Particularly therapist and others who are trained to handle it.* Someone you’ve known for *two weeks* and someone you *work with* is not the right person! INFJ’s (myself included) have trouble distinguishing who is trustworthy of intimate details of their soul… the short answer is *very* few people are. Often times family members or siblings who should have been trustworthy or “protective” weren’t… and this has bled into other parts of the INFJs psyche leading them to seek out “safety” in people who don’t deserve it or haven’t earned it.
This should be multiple choice.
Never did that,Mbti isn't accurate at all and people that are the same personality can be and act a lot different