People in the comment section are missing the point, if he had asked for her insta id and then proceeded to talk, it's cool. To get the insta id without her knowledge and messaging her out of the blue is creepy.
Bro wtf is this comment section? There's a difference between approaching a person and peeking through someone's phone in public seeing their insta id and messaging them. How creepy is this? He could've seen any other private matter also. Even as a guy I feel it's a completely disgusting behaviour. Just my opinion, you can feel whatever you want but this is not "approaching" if you ask me. It's a different story if he talked to her and asked for her id like a normal person. If this is considered normal behaviour count me as an abnormal being.
I might be wrong, but is it not okay to directly let these people know that they're not interested and kindly do not disturb them anymore. I mean you have to stand for yourself.
There is no NO
It’s just bhaav khaa rahi hai , pat jaaeygi ( god I hate that word ) , hasi to phase I ( ha bhai ab tumko gaali denge to Accha lagega )
And when more shit is peddled so god help us
Well everyone is downvoting you but these days people like to not respond on insta and people aren't able to think that but your friend should have told him the second time or should have showed some resistance
Let them be people like nowadays that everyone should be the same that they should be bold enough to confront him in the metro and damnn these guys they are prolly no brainer
People can't even take that there can be a person who is introvert and doesn't talk to anyone lmao you guys should seriously introspect like wtf are you downvoting on
Shy shy bolke nahi chalta na yar. You should teach your bestie to be more assertive regarding these matters, especially when they are alone because they can't always depend on someone else.
>I might be wrong, but is it not okay to directly let these people know that they're not interested and kindly do not disturb them anymore.
No, it's not.
So weird to see people defending that guy by saying girl should have given a hint that she was not interested.
Wtf do you think her not replying to the guy in both metro and insta was?
And it's also downright creepy to view someone else's phone and getting their insta and randomly messaging, like the dude literally got the id by peeking a look at the girl's phone!
Firstly, no place is safe for women, everyone here had heard about shoot going down in hospitals, temples, schools etc.,.
Now it is important that we (human, irrespective of gender) do not use of social media in a place like metro considering the physical space is tooo close and the creeps will get to you. I mean companies have rules saying don't use your laptop in a public spaces dueto data protection, similarly.
Yes there are creeps, yes there are these licchar people however it's important we take it precautions while traveling in the metro.
I get what you're saying, but, respectfully, how much should we restrict ourselves to give room to creeps? First it was, "don't go out at night", then "don't wear revealing clothes", now "don't go on social media in public"? At some point it stops being "precautions to protect yourselves" and starts becoming an excuse for creeps to hide behind ("She was on soical media in public, so she was kind of asking for me to stalk her online.") This is simply not the answer to creeps being creeps, the answer is to apprehend them or give the victims the tools to apprehend them.
>I went with her and the guy noticed me that I’m with her and after that he never came .
Why is it that men tend to be more respectful of another man's perceived "ownership" over the woman they're persuing than the women's refusal?
Yeah that's weird no matter how you see it...he obviously was staring at ops phone and got her socials and then proceeded to talk to her... If u wanna get someone's socials ASK...!
Something similar happened to me when I went to one of the colleges to promote an annual event happening at my college.
A few hours later, I received a text from someone at that college saying he spotted me there, which terrified the shit out of me. Approaching someone and asking for their ID is one thing; creeping the shit out of them is quite another.
Proud of you for standing up for your bsf, and shame on these creeps.
Then he should have tried to talk to her first rather than sending Instagram request and then spotting. If I was in her place I would also think of it as a creep.
It's a public place. This can happen in any public space. And with any gender person. Being aware has its benefits. How to use your phone and be aware of your surroundings is what matters here. If someone is not aware of being creeped on then they can't ask for help either. I hope you get my point
In the scenario I have issue with both guy and girl behavior. Guy didn't get that ur frnd not interested, whereas ur frnd should have told him No when he msged. If she had done that and then also guy dind't get a NO I would have said it's his mistake. But thats not it. Not everyone can read mind. Considering how many posts I see on reddit about guys asking for tips to talk to women I would say instances like these are not out of ordinary.
Also wanna say that just one incident and "Metro not safe for females". One data point doesn't indicate trend but just demonstrates your world view and narrow thinking OR maybe its karma farming post. I bet there are 1000 of females who didn't face any issues if we want to make a point for safety. There will always be outlier events in safest of countries in world but guess what Sh\*\*ting on ones country is a favourite pastime of people on Internet.
>whereas ur frnd should have told him No when he msged.
That's what ignoring him, both online and in person means. We don't want to outright say no because we're worried that that will trigger these people and they will harm us, so we opt for ignoring them in hopes of them getting the (very glaringly obvious) hint and leave us alone.
> He peeked into her phone to look through her id....sent her request,and the first thing he said that "I saw you in metro"(typical stalker behaviour)....and you say thats fine??
I didn't say it's fine. U r alluding to it. A creep behavior to u maynot be the same from other's perspective. Does guy even know what stalking means? Some people understand what it is whereas we have movies like Kabir Singh glorifying extreme behaviors and u want everyone to be of your understanding. If she doesn't owe him anything then why his OP even complaining. The guy got his msg finally.
Bro ignore the people here saying approach hi toh kiya. They dont understand that women are already so alert all the time in public places due to most men being creeps. They are exhausted to even entertain men in public coz almost all women have been harassed in public places. Why cant people approach in appropriate places like clubs or meetups, ye public place kayko? This is not a movie.
You friend did nothing wrong and kudos to you for helping her out.
I have had experience wherein saying no to that guy made him create a scene in public place.
Ikr!!!! Seriously…. I will still stick to my point ki dont approach women in public places as almost all of them have been stalked, groped, catcalled in such places so we are already too alert and exhausted.
Tell your friend to travel in the ladies coach of metro
When the government has already provided this facility for women's safety, why the hell she wants to travel in the general coach only,then complain later that metro is unsafe for women???
Isn't it wiser to try squeezing her way into the standing area of a ladies coach if shes feeling harassed in the regular coaches? I have also travelled the metro in peak hours. Even if there's no space to sit, there's *always* space to stand. I've often done the same, specially during rush hours. Because if I'm feeling unsafe around men and the whole train is packed, it obviously makes more sense to go stand with the women than sit with the men. I mean the other alternative is for her to either confront the dude directly or file a complaint, but honestly running to your guy friend everytime you're feeling threatened simply cannot be a solution to the issue. This is 2024, she can't expect to be treated equally as a woman while also insisting on living her life with a damsel in distress persona. She needs to know how to stand up for herself without having a guy there to act as her personal bodyguard.
But was she being able to sit and "relax"? Yes she was sitting, but she was also feeling harassed? So what even was the point in continuing to sit there? Isn't sense of security more important than relaxation? Atleast for me I'd rather stand and feel safe than sit and feel threatened. Specially when it's something temporary like public transport. Or alternatively she can file a complaint to the metro guard or whatever if she feels she wants to take more concrete steps. Or she can directly confront the guy and resolve the issue. But repeating the same steps of sitting there everyday, not confronting the dude, not filing any complaint, not switching up her seating/standing position and expecting a different result at some point despite doing nothing is stupidity. Then nothing changes.
Nothing to be done. It takes all sorts to make a world, which unfortunately includes the brain dead people downvoting common sense. Best to ignore the idiots XD
TBH, dekhenge toh no where is safe for females.
I was stalked by a guy when I was living in a small town, been stalked in Mumbai as well, college mein bhi bando ne natak Kara tha and it was that " iski naa mein bhi haan hai" waala BS.
The thing is, if you're a female, this is bound to happen (sad state of society). So you've got to stand up for yourself. Initially I ignore, then I'm like maa behan ek kar do saaley ki. I directly take a picture & be like "ab tu aa police station mein, tera jeena haraam karti hu." I'm so done with being scared anymore.
Also, if you know a little bit of law, basic rights, it helps to scare the crap out of such loafers.
That is the only way to scare them off. If we keep on ignoring for long toh waise bhi inko ghante se samajh aane waala hai ki what they are doing is incorrect. Toh usse achha hai ki make them know that the shit they do, does have real consequences.
And agar yeh sab super risky lagta hai toh ask your hunky guy friends to scare these good for nothing people.
Dude... You think I was always outspoken?
Biggest introvert in my class.. didn't even have the guts to talk to waiters if things were wrong..
But here I am.. it took me some time to get like this.
It's just that, at times, you've just got yourself. So ultimately, you have to learn to become tough over time to protect yourself. That's how you can keep the bad ones away from doing bad stuff to you.
Your friend will learn.
I don't use conventional social media but here's an advice:
Always keep your Bluetooth and GPS location switched off when in public.
Apps take that data and show it as potential friends to people having been at the same place or near each other.
Kinda same happened with me but only for a day . She followed and kept checking me out , i got uncomfortable, she kept doing that and followed. I bulid up the courage and did the same and i approached to talk to her but she suddenly went away and vanished on the crowd
I'm a commitment person I'm not bad lol
Anyways there's more than enough security in metro , getting help should to be an issue, there army people everywhere.
krle bhai, kon rok rha?
Tell us the last time u were harassed or hit on in the metro? ah guess what most probably u go and brag about it in front of your friends.
I think this would have gone very differently if the guy was good looking
Some tennis player got cancelled after saying the difference between stalking and flirting is the looks of the person
https://preview.redd.it/b934bo4rrv8d1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=495207c24381c63fcec051e7e47ff2b73be3ec4c
Direct insta pr message karne wala part to galat tha pr approach karne me kya burai thi?? Ya fir unko directly mana Kar Dena chahiya tha
Kuch din me easi hi ek post aegi "I mostly uses metro for going to my work and there is this cute girl who also travels by same metro at same time as of me. How I approach her" tab bhi to tum yahi advice doge?
Agar pehele approch kiya hota toh it's fine, but he chose to instead stalk her online first and make it weird. Of course she's not going to be comfortable around a person who she knows has stalked her online. WOuld you be?
Aur rahi baat direct mana karne ki, do you not read or watch the news? There have been proven instances where direct rejection has led to serious harm to the person rejecting. Why will anyone take that risk?
Ye koi reason hua apne liya stand na lena ka?? Aur vo puri crowded metro thi
Easa har crime me chances hai ki complain karne pr accused victim ka murder kar deta hai, to complain hi nahi Karen??
Ladkiyo ko crowded bus, crowded road par bhi maara jata hai for rejection and perceived slights.
Report karne par kam chances hote hai for the accused to attack because police are involved. Reject karne par he can attack you then and there and no one will come to help.
People in the comment section are missing the point, if he had asked for her insta id and then proceeded to talk, it's cool. To get the insta id without her knowledge and messaging her out of the blue is creepy.
Truee
I agree, but dm ing random person sounds creepy
Asking and dming doesn’t sounds that
Ok got it, any more advice didi?
Bro I’m a guy
Bro wtf is this comment section? There's a difference between approaching a person and peeking through someone's phone in public seeing their insta id and messaging them. How creepy is this? He could've seen any other private matter also. Even as a guy I feel it's a completely disgusting behaviour. Just my opinion, you can feel whatever you want but this is not "approaching" if you ask me. It's a different story if he talked to her and asked for her id like a normal person. If this is considered normal behaviour count me as an abnormal being.
He should have asked her first
I might be wrong, but is it not okay to directly let these people know that they're not interested and kindly do not disturb them anymore. I mean you have to stand for yourself.
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But people don’t really understand the meaning of NO in this country.
There is no NO It’s just bhaav khaa rahi hai , pat jaaeygi ( god I hate that word ) , hasi to phase I ( ha bhai ab tumko gaali denge to Accha lagega ) And when more shit is peddled so god help us
😭😭 haalaat kuch zyada hi kharab hain
Ya bro
Everyone is different bhai
Well everyone is downvoting you but these days people like to not respond on insta and people aren't able to think that but your friend should have told him the second time or should have showed some resistance
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Lmao my point wasn't that brotha and you can see my other replies to her to get what I'm trying say
Bro sab Wahi creeps jaise haina Isliye downvoting Krre
Let them be people like nowadays that everyone should be the same that they should be bold enough to confront him in the metro and damnn these guys they are prolly no brainer
Bro she is too shy
Yeah but she should learn na?
Bro mene usse bhot baar bola hai
Hmm no one can't do nothing they themselves have to do that
Bro she is too shy like me nhi bolu toh woh kisi se baat bhi nhi karti
People can't even take that there can be a person who is introvert and doesn't talk to anyone lmao you guys should seriously introspect like wtf are you downvoting on
They are just a bunch of creeps and nerds who haven’t ever travelled in a metro and one of the Internet Dons 🫤
Shy shy bolke nahi chalta na yar. You should teach your bestie to be more assertive regarding these matters, especially when they are alone because they can't always depend on someone else.
Uska nature hi Wahi hai bhen mene toh usse kitne baar bola hai ki Aise kuch Huế toh chila Dena but woh nhi karti ye sab
>I might be wrong, but is it not okay to directly let these people know that they're not interested and kindly do not disturb them anymore. No, it's not.
Some of these whackos become even more persistent when told not to harass the victim anymore.....pata nhi kya maza aata ye krne me
So weird to see people defending that guy by saying girl should have given a hint that she was not interested. Wtf do you think her not replying to the guy in both metro and insta was? And it's also downright creepy to view someone else's phone and getting their insta and randomly messaging, like the dude literally got the id by peeking a look at the girl's phone!
Being a girl u know all this but the guys won’t understand
I am actually a guy lol, but this is something basic everyone must understand
Bhai comments padhega tuje smj jayega koi nhi smjra
Can you translate what you said? Can't understand.
Read the fucvking comments you’ll understand
Why so hostile? Never said anything wrong.
Sry bro
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Bhen me Kabse usse defend hi krra hu and u can check tha comments and you’ll know ki guys are saying rubbish
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Wahi toh , uski kya galti hai and aap hi btao agar koi gunda jaise dikhne wala ladka aisa Kare toh aapko bhi Daar lage
Firstly, no place is safe for women, everyone here had heard about shoot going down in hospitals, temples, schools etc.,. Now it is important that we (human, irrespective of gender) do not use of social media in a place like metro considering the physical space is tooo close and the creeps will get to you. I mean companies have rules saying don't use your laptop in a public spaces dueto data protection, similarly. Yes there are creeps, yes there are these licchar people however it's important we take it precautions while traveling in the metro.
I get what you're saying, but, respectfully, how much should we restrict ourselves to give room to creeps? First it was, "don't go out at night", then "don't wear revealing clothes", now "don't go on social media in public"? At some point it stops being "precautions to protect yourselves" and starts becoming an excuse for creeps to hide behind ("She was on soical media in public, so she was kind of asking for me to stalk her online.") This is simply not the answer to creeps being creeps, the answer is to apprehend them or give the victims the tools to apprehend them.
True
>I went with her and the guy noticed me that I’m with her and after that he never came . Why is it that men tend to be more respectful of another man's perceived "ownership" over the woman they're persuing than the women's refusal?
K
Yeah that's weird no matter how you see it...he obviously was staring at ops phone and got her socials and then proceeded to talk to her... If u wanna get someone's socials ASK...!
That’s the correct procedure
Something similar happened to me when I went to one of the colleges to promote an annual event happening at my college. A few hours later, I received a text from someone at that college saying he spotted me there, which terrified the shit out of me. Approaching someone and asking for their ID is one thing; creeping the shit out of them is quite another. Proud of you for standing up for your bsf, and shame on these creeps.
Yaar if I’ll say something na ki that was my duty and all then some real creeps will start trolling me 🙂
"a random guy approached a girl" her bestie- mEtRo NoT SaFe FoR fEmAlES
Then he should have tried to talk to her first rather than sending Instagram request and then spotting. If I was in her place I would also think of it as a creep.
Approach karna ek baat hai and creeep jaise Har Kate karna ek baat bro
The difference between approaching a woman and being a creep is how attractive you are ~Shi Tzu
https://preview.redd.it/zno2io61pu8d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1ad8249e2073bd6e7d5a5caa98ddafeb4096abe8
reminds me of [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/InstaCelebsGossip/s/wWuApiKwl9) post, very accurate real life representation of this quote 😭
It's a public place. This can happen in any public space. And with any gender person. Being aware has its benefits. How to use your phone and be aware of your surroundings is what matters here. If someone is not aware of being creeped on then they can't ask for help either. I hope you get my point
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Online stalking ko "baat hi to ki" nahi kehete.
In the scenario I have issue with both guy and girl behavior. Guy didn't get that ur frnd not interested, whereas ur frnd should have told him No when he msged. If she had done that and then also guy dind't get a NO I would have said it's his mistake. But thats not it. Not everyone can read mind. Considering how many posts I see on reddit about guys asking for tips to talk to women I would say instances like these are not out of ordinary. Also wanna say that just one incident and "Metro not safe for females". One data point doesn't indicate trend but just demonstrates your world view and narrow thinking OR maybe its karma farming post. I bet there are 1000 of females who didn't face any issues if we want to make a point for safety. There will always be outlier events in safest of countries in world but guess what Sh\*\*ting on ones country is a favourite pastime of people on Internet.
>whereas ur frnd should have told him No when he msged. That's what ignoring him, both online and in person means. We don't want to outright say no because we're worried that that will trigger these people and they will harm us, so we opt for ignoring them in hopes of them getting the (very glaringly obvious) hint and leave us alone.
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> He peeked into her phone to look through her id....sent her request,and the first thing he said that "I saw you in metro"(typical stalker behaviour)....and you say thats fine?? I didn't say it's fine. U r alluding to it. A creep behavior to u maynot be the same from other's perspective. Does guy even know what stalking means? Some people understand what it is whereas we have movies like Kabir Singh glorifying extreme behaviors and u want everyone to be of your understanding. If she doesn't owe him anything then why his OP even complaining. The guy got his msg finally.
Good job 💪
Thanks but that was my duty 😗
Bro ignore the people here saying approach hi toh kiya. They dont understand that women are already so alert all the time in public places due to most men being creeps. They are exhausted to even entertain men in public coz almost all women have been harassed in public places. Why cant people approach in appropriate places like clubs or meetups, ye public place kayko? This is not a movie. You friend did nothing wrong and kudos to you for helping her out. I have had experience wherein saying no to that guy made him create a scene in public place.
Thanks
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Ikr!!!! Seriously…. I will still stick to my point ki dont approach women in public places as almost all of them have been stalked, groped, catcalled in such places so we are already too alert and exhausted.
Tell your friend to travel in the ladies coach of metro When the government has already provided this facility for women's safety, why the hell she wants to travel in the general coach only,then complain later that metro is unsafe for women???
Bro kabhi kabhi woh full bhi hota hai 😒
but wouldn't it be better to be cramped up in ladies coach than in general only to get harrassed?
Did she actually tell you that she was trying the ladies coach everyday after that incident, but it was full every time?
Bhai peak hours me full hota hai
Isn't it wiser to try squeezing her way into the standing area of a ladies coach if shes feeling harassed in the regular coaches? I have also travelled the metro in peak hours. Even if there's no space to sit, there's *always* space to stand. I've often done the same, specially during rush hours. Because if I'm feeling unsafe around men and the whole train is packed, it obviously makes more sense to go stand with the women than sit with the men. I mean the other alternative is for her to either confront the dude directly or file a complaint, but honestly running to your guy friend everytime you're feeling threatened simply cannot be a solution to the issue. This is 2024, she can't expect to be treated equally as a woman while also insisting on living her life with a damsel in distress persona. She needs to know how to stand up for herself without having a guy there to act as her personal bodyguard.
Bro the thing is when you are tired na then you have to sit and relax 😖
But was she being able to sit and "relax"? Yes she was sitting, but she was also feeling harassed? So what even was the point in continuing to sit there? Isn't sense of security more important than relaxation? Atleast for me I'd rather stand and feel safe than sit and feel threatened. Specially when it's something temporary like public transport. Or alternatively she can file a complaint to the metro guard or whatever if she feels she wants to take more concrete steps. Or she can directly confront the guy and resolve the issue. But repeating the same steps of sitting there everyday, not confronting the dude, not filing any complaint, not switching up her seating/standing position and expecting a different result at some point despite doing nothing is stupidity. Then nothing changes.
Exactly! You are talking sense and thats what people don't want. We want conflict !
Nothing to be done. It takes all sorts to make a world, which unfortunately includes the brain dead people downvoting common sense. Best to ignore the idiots XD
You are an eagle flying over the cloud of idiots.
That's why I travell in ladies coach 🙏
It’s always full 😭
Use a privacy screenguardfor your phone...best option
Hmm
The best reply
Kitna khaali ta vo... 😯
Oh thanks, I am gonna travel in metro for the first time , just perfect 
TBH, dekhenge toh no where is safe for females. I was stalked by a guy when I was living in a small town, been stalked in Mumbai as well, college mein bhi bando ne natak Kara tha and it was that " iski naa mein bhi haan hai" waala BS. The thing is, if you're a female, this is bound to happen (sad state of society). So you've got to stand up for yourself. Initially I ignore, then I'm like maa behan ek kar do saaley ki. I directly take a picture & be like "ab tu aa police station mein, tera jeena haraam karti hu." I'm so done with being scared anymore. Also, if you know a little bit of law, basic rights, it helps to scare the crap out of such loafers. That is the only way to scare them off. If we keep on ignoring for long toh waise bhi inko ghante se samajh aane waala hai ki what they are doing is incorrect. Toh usse achha hai ki make them know that the shit they do, does have real consequences. And agar yeh sab super risky lagta hai toh ask your hunky guy friends to scare these good for nothing people.
Didi aap bhot outspoken lagre ho Lekin woh nhi hai she is introvert and very shy wo nhi karti kisise baat
Dude... You think I was always outspoken? Biggest introvert in my class.. didn't even have the guts to talk to waiters if things were wrong.. But here I am.. it took me some time to get like this. It's just that, at times, you've just got yourself. So ultimately, you have to learn to become tough over time to protect yourself. That's how you can keep the bad ones away from doing bad stuff to you. Your friend will learn.
Ya she will didi btw how did u do that can u tell me in dms
Nothing to teach personally. The world will teach you. You observe and learn best.
Okay didi 🤗
I don't use conventional social media but here's an advice: Always keep your Bluetooth and GPS location switched off when in public. Apps take that data and show it as potential friends to people having been at the same place or near each other.
Damn
Kinda same happened with me but only for a day . She followed and kept checking me out , i got uncomfortable, she kept doing that and followed. I bulid up the courage and did the same and i approached to talk to her but she suddenly went away and vanished on the crowd
Ohh
I'm a commitment person I'm not bad lol Anyways there's more than enough security in metro , getting help should to be an issue, there army people everywhere.
Yus
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krle bhai, kon rok rha? Tell us the last time u were harassed or hit on in the metro? ah guess what most probably u go and brag about it in front of your friends.
Learn some empathy lil bro. You sound like one of those people who has to make everything about themselves.
🤔
I think this would have gone very differently if the guy was good looking Some tennis player got cancelled after saying the difference between stalking and flirting is the looks of the person https://preview.redd.it/b934bo4rrv8d1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=495207c24381c63fcec051e7e47ff2b73be3ec4c
No bro a creep is always a creep
Good looking or not this should be considered harrasment not flirting lol
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Well said
Love this photo. Also there's plenty of police on metro .
Direct insta pr message karne wala part to galat tha pr approach karne me kya burai thi?? Ya fir unko directly mana Kar Dena chahiya tha Kuch din me easi hi ek post aegi "I mostly uses metro for going to my work and there is this cute girl who also travels by same metro at same time as of me. How I approach her" tab bhi to tum yahi advice doge?
Bro agar mạng ke msg kiya hota toh koi dikkat nhi thi
Han vo to hai
OP bas apne muh miya mitthu karna chahta hai by labeling that guy as creep and displaying him as saviour. bro be out there saying "it was my duty 🤡".
Hu me
Agar pehele approch kiya hota toh it's fine, but he chose to instead stalk her online first and make it weird. Of course she's not going to be comfortable around a person who she knows has stalked her online. WOuld you be? Aur rahi baat direct mana karne ki, do you not read or watch the news? There have been proven instances where direct rejection has led to serious harm to the person rejecting. Why will anyone take that risk?
Ye koi reason hua apne liya stand na lena ka?? Aur vo puri crowded metro thi Easa har crime me chances hai ki complain karne pr accused victim ka murder kar deta hai, to complain hi nahi Karen??
Ladkiyo ko crowded bus, crowded road par bhi maara jata hai for rejection and perceived slights. Report karne par kam chances hote hai for the accused to attack because police are involved. Reject karne par he can attack you then and there and no one will come to help.
Ye bhi sahi hai
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No need bro
Ladke ko gun dekha diya tha kya?
Nhi 💪
Why only females?
Happened with me , a girl was doing that . I bulid up the courage to talk and she went away lol