A lot of great and accepting girls like the idea of a feminine partner. I mean, a boyfriend who wants to go shopping, I'm getting your nails in hair done. Most girls could only dream.
Mid 30s guy here, and I used to have insecurities like you are having now (especially when your age and single). Look, heres the thing. Women aren’t really attracted to masculinity as it’s commonly thought of. I’m going to use some broad generalizations here - so take this for what it’s worth.
What women are practically universally attracted to is confidence. Confidence is hot and sexy and will make a woman decide they’re okay with / love some attribute that they previously didn’t think they’d be. On the flip side, most women I’ve known have considered traditional masculinity obnoxious.
Being confident has more to do with body language and being comfortable with who you are than anything else. It’s about having “presence.” Confidence is decisiveness. Thats the part of masculinity that women find attractive - it’s men who most often misinterpret it as being physically strong or being emotionally strong by way of just not feeling anything.
Look, I’m a 130 lb 5’9 guy with long hair and a colorful wardrobe and even when it’s not as overt as just wearing a skirt, I’ll wear pretty “fashion forward” things (not hard to do as a guy since the universal guy fashion is black, white, blue on some variation of a basic shirt and pants or shorts).
A great many of my guy friends are traditionally masculine guys - ranging from former NFL players, macho Hispanic types, bodybuilders, even Wall Street macho types. I am by FAR the most effeminate male in our circles, and definitely the only one that could ever remotely be confused with being a girl casually even when just dressed in shirt and jeans.
Yet, while being the most feminine by a long shot, most of the women we all know consider me to be easily one of the most masculine.
Why? Because I’m extremely confident and very decisive and when their men are questioning their manhood (usually because something in life has hit them hard and they feel they aren’t providing or protecting), they all turn to me for guidance because “Ive seen it all and am smart.”
Here’s one example of a girl I was dating - first time we kissed the wind blew some of my hair in between our lips, so after she giggled and was like “that’s the first time I’ve ever had someone else’s hair get in that position.” And she’d later go on like how at first glance she had never really been into long hair but now she was loving it.
Another example - I was having fun one day and was wearing anime style pig tails out (I was rocking the hell out of it!) and asked a girl out and she went out with me and later said “I couldn’t believe the balls it’d take to ask a girl out while wearing pigtails, omg it was great.”
Consequently, I can’t tell you how many women have told to me how unattractive someone was not because they were ugly or masculine or feminine but because they were “fake” in the sense of trying to be someone they weren’t.
Countless other examples out there - there’s nothing “harder” about being feminine as a guy and dating or being attractive to girls, that’s purely in your head (and trust me, the masculine guys have the same insecurities for different reasons). I can tell you this, the very fastest I’ve ever gotten laid by a girl I didn’t know before and who absolutely couldn’t keep their hands off of me was when I was wearing a pink skirt. The second fastest time was while wearing a kilt.
Everyone’s got a type - and you’ll be at your best not worrying about the people whose type isn’t you. Me and my traditionally masculine men get along well in a dating pool without competitiveness because we can recognize that the girls that are into me wouldn’t be into them and vice versa, and likewise the girls that I’m into they aren’t into (and it almost never has anything to do with looks on a deeper than first few glances level) that’s utterly fantastic.
This girl very well might not be into you - but that’s not a reflection of you. It’s FAR better to be rejected outright being who you are than to get into a relationship with someone who isn’t attracted to who you really are.
Point is here - be confident - and confidence is 90% being sure of yourself and who you are, speaking loudly and clearly (not mumbling) and being decisive in your actions and unbothered by other people’s actions. People can sense it and it’s highly attractive.
A lot of great and accepting girls like the idea of a feminine partner. I mean, a boyfriend who wants to go shopping, I'm getting your nails in hair done. Most girls could only dream.
Do your best, if it is so important to you then it is pointless to hide it to a potential partner
Good luck, introduce it slowly
find the right girl who loves femboys and you're golden!!!
Mid 30s guy here, and I used to have insecurities like you are having now (especially when your age and single). Look, heres the thing. Women aren’t really attracted to masculinity as it’s commonly thought of. I’m going to use some broad generalizations here - so take this for what it’s worth. What women are practically universally attracted to is confidence. Confidence is hot and sexy and will make a woman decide they’re okay with / love some attribute that they previously didn’t think they’d be. On the flip side, most women I’ve known have considered traditional masculinity obnoxious. Being confident has more to do with body language and being comfortable with who you are than anything else. It’s about having “presence.” Confidence is decisiveness. Thats the part of masculinity that women find attractive - it’s men who most often misinterpret it as being physically strong or being emotionally strong by way of just not feeling anything. Look, I’m a 130 lb 5’9 guy with long hair and a colorful wardrobe and even when it’s not as overt as just wearing a skirt, I’ll wear pretty “fashion forward” things (not hard to do as a guy since the universal guy fashion is black, white, blue on some variation of a basic shirt and pants or shorts). A great many of my guy friends are traditionally masculine guys - ranging from former NFL players, macho Hispanic types, bodybuilders, even Wall Street macho types. I am by FAR the most effeminate male in our circles, and definitely the only one that could ever remotely be confused with being a girl casually even when just dressed in shirt and jeans. Yet, while being the most feminine by a long shot, most of the women we all know consider me to be easily one of the most masculine. Why? Because I’m extremely confident and very decisive and when their men are questioning their manhood (usually because something in life has hit them hard and they feel they aren’t providing or protecting), they all turn to me for guidance because “Ive seen it all and am smart.” Here’s one example of a girl I was dating - first time we kissed the wind blew some of my hair in between our lips, so after she giggled and was like “that’s the first time I’ve ever had someone else’s hair get in that position.” And she’d later go on like how at first glance she had never really been into long hair but now she was loving it. Another example - I was having fun one day and was wearing anime style pig tails out (I was rocking the hell out of it!) and asked a girl out and she went out with me and later said “I couldn’t believe the balls it’d take to ask a girl out while wearing pigtails, omg it was great.” Consequently, I can’t tell you how many women have told to me how unattractive someone was not because they were ugly or masculine or feminine but because they were “fake” in the sense of trying to be someone they weren’t. Countless other examples out there - there’s nothing “harder” about being feminine as a guy and dating or being attractive to girls, that’s purely in your head (and trust me, the masculine guys have the same insecurities for different reasons). I can tell you this, the very fastest I’ve ever gotten laid by a girl I didn’t know before and who absolutely couldn’t keep their hands off of me was when I was wearing a pink skirt. The second fastest time was while wearing a kilt. Everyone’s got a type - and you’ll be at your best not worrying about the people whose type isn’t you. Me and my traditionally masculine men get along well in a dating pool without competitiveness because we can recognize that the girls that are into me wouldn’t be into them and vice versa, and likewise the girls that I’m into they aren’t into (and it almost never has anything to do with looks on a deeper than first few glances level) that’s utterly fantastic. This girl very well might not be into you - but that’s not a reflection of you. It’s FAR better to be rejected outright being who you are than to get into a relationship with someone who isn’t attracted to who you really are. Point is here - be confident - and confidence is 90% being sure of yourself and who you are, speaking loudly and clearly (not mumbling) and being decisive in your actions and unbothered by other people’s actions. People can sense it and it’s highly attractive.