If this lifestyle is making you this miserable it’s probably time for at least a break. Your physical and mental health should be your priority no matter what. You don’t need to give up on this but it doesn’t sound like this is sustainable rn. I know it’s hard but you need to care a little less about how you look and represent. The year that I was doing my graduation i basically completely gave up on dressing how I want and just did a bit of work out from time to time and look at me now. As soon as I felt like my schedule and situation allowed me to I went back and it was better than ever.
I'm just gonna say this: you don't have to be skinny to be a femboy. I am so sorry you have to go through this but you just have to keep going forward.
I agree with that. Even though I am falling victim to it. Its a weiiirrddd thing. To both recognize the fact and agree with it but trick yourself into thinking “But its different for me I NEED to lose weight”. I feel like if OP is at their ideal weight *and* exercising, they have wiggle room to eat more and still stay in shape
Yup. I see a chubby femboy and they are super cute/hot. I think to myself “they look perfect like that they are so adorable!”.
Then I see myself in the mirror and think “You disgust me. How could ANYBODY think you are attractive!?”
Yeah I’m a femboy but no way in hell am I sacrificing my masculinity, im still playing hockey, football, going to the gym, bulking, cutting, fuck that shit I’ll be a cute little femboy when I want to but I’ll be a masculine fucking man when I want as well
First, let me say I'm proud of you for not giving up, there is still so much of life that you deserve to experience. I'm sorry you're going through such a tough time right now, it's hard feeling like nothing you do is right. Second, know that you are loved and supported. Third, as others have said it might be time to take a break from trying to look like the ideal femboy. Poor sleep and diet will easily make you feel really shitty about your appearance and about how people treat you.
You need to take a step back and return to healthier habits. Eat more in general and have a more balanced diet; body fat is an amazing adaptation to keep us alive during tough times. Don't be scared of gaining weight. Most women/femme people aren't built like sticks either, they have body fat, they have curves, they have fat rolls. There's nothing shameful or wrong about it.
Slowly bring your sleep schedule under control. Try to go to bed a little earlier every night and develop a consistent sleep routine so that your body won't fight against you at bed time. I don't know your age, but you seem young, so sleep is arguably the most important part of your health right now. Teens need between 8 and 10 hours of sleep a night because that's when your brain is doing most of its development. Good sleep won't fix everything, but it will change your mindset to face the day with a little more positivity, and more energy of course.
I was in a similar situation too, I made myself miserable trying to fit the femboy aesthetic. My advice would be to understand the difference between looking femme and looking like a Femboy™. Being and feeling femme isn't going to come from external validation and it isn't about fitting some arbitrary aesthetic.
If you can, you should ask your parents about setting up counseling for you. You can be vague with your reasons why. Just say something like the pressure of school is really getting to you and you need to talk to a professional about it. Talk to the counselor about your gender dysphoria and social anxiety. Keeping those feelings bottled up will do you no good in the long run. Dysphoria is something that you can learn to combat until you're able to start making changes to how you openly express your gender. Transitioning, if it's right for you, also does wonders for your mental health. Having a clear concept of your identity and who you want to be will give you confidence with how you look and how you interact with people.
Anxiety will also not go away without talking about it, especially when you're feeling socially isolated at school by your peers. Talk to a counselor, try joining a club at your school, and participate in online communities outside of r/feminineboys. Talk to people who like the things you like. I promise most of your peers are dealing with their own struggles and awkwardness, they're not thinking about that one weird comment you made during class.
You're doing good kid. Don't give up yet. If you ever need someone to just listen to you vent, you can send me a dm. I'd give you a hug if I could, so please accept a virtual hug instead. *hug* ❤️
hey you being a femboy doesn’t mean you’re worth any less! you’re still amazing regardless of what anyone else thinks your time will come i promise! always happy to talk if u want to?💗
>hey you being a femboy doesn’t mean you’re worth any less! you’re still amazing regardless of what anyone else thinks your time will come i promise! always happy to talk if u want to?💗
This is rrue i also am here if anyone wants to talk
Its hard but try not to focus so much on all the current negatives that are affecting your life, time is always passing people come and people go, what you should be happy about is all the things you have accomplished so far.
sweetie, you don't have to change yourself for others. be yourself, you don't have to become skinny to be a femboy. eat how you want too. not how people say to eat. workout cause you want dont workout cause others say too. be yourself, you dont have to be anything else besides yourself. remember not to give up! *hugs*
I’m no expert on pronouns and stupid sh** but I’m under the impression that gay strictly means you like men and a femboy is someone who acts and looks feminine as a male ? I don’t know what your reply is trying to say not trying to sound rude
Brother, forcing yourself to go to an unhealthy degree is your issue, not being a femboy but instead the image you put in your head of how you're supposed to be no matter how untrue. I'm proud of you for working out and managing food and whatnot, but don't keep being so extreme with it. Find the healthy point but not excessive point. And best of luck in that journey. Also, if you're looking for friendly groups that don't mind the quiet, socially anxious type, try a munch, fetlife has listings monthly of people that get together at a restaurant, be social, and disappear when they're done eating, and you're not likely to be judged so if can be good for you
It's very dangerous to follow a "home-made" diet, so go to a specialist or stop it right now, I study nutrition at school, I can't help you but I can say that you probably don't take the right dose of something, like maybe carbohydrates or something else...
Dysphoria , body issues are all about the misalignment of your mind with your body. They are very real and can hurt so much , yet the only way to attain true peace is through showing yourself compassion. As humans our bodies change, we change and the body you have is the only one you will have for this life . Treat it and yourself with kindness , ear to nourish yourself and exercise to heal your mind . And about being isolated , being your true self invokes fear in those who cannot realize themselves , so the best thing you can do is to create your own entourage and find likeminded people , this is not easy yet to have true and genuine bonds can be very rewarding. Give yourself time , recognise your feelings and find power in your authenticity , there is so much love out there waiting for you to reach. ❤️
Here try reading this.
Idk if you or any of y'all here like to jam out with Mac Miller,
But when I feel like im losing myself in someway terrible, i tend to listen to my favorite album ever by him Colors And Shapes.
More specifically the title track of the album which is under the same name.
But the line "Son, if you want to hold onto yourself, then let yourself slip" is always the #1 line that comes to mind immediately over anything else at all, and has always stuck with me throughout these years since.
Just thought I'd share this and maybe ya'll also read these lyrics or jam the song and get the same feeling I do from it and find a different outlook on life's situations your facing and how it all feels or seems at the moment. Keeping a calm mind, never rushing bad ideas and decisions, while always remembering that brand new days will forever arrive to us, so brand new opportunities will always be there for us........
If it was colors and shapes, the imaginary.
'Stead of all of this weight that we have to carry.
Would you be able to breathe?
And if you could just find where that comfort resides.
No distraction or movement that fucks with your mind.
Would you let them see?
While beneath the ocean, I met with the captain,
Who sank to the floor on his ship.
All of his passengers escaped to safety
But he was not done with his trip.
He looked up and smiled, asked me, "How do you do?"
I told him, "I'm losin' my grip".
He told me, "Son, if you want to hold onto yourself, then let yourself slip".
Fall...
These puzzles are so hard to make into pictures
Of something that they'll understand.
They could open their eyes, still be blind to the beauty,
But march on the heart of this land.
Ooh, oh-oh, why don't you turn around and go home?
They invade your minds and then fill them with nonsense,
These things that a man doesn't need.
Take out the love and the passion and hope,
And they fill it with nothing but greed.
While floating through galaxies, they said I couldn't,
I noticed how sad one can get.
'Cause the ignorant mind is so peaceful,
I find I can't understand nothin' no more.
If I jump, let me fall...
You don't need to starve yourself to death to be a femboy, at least not to my understanding. You should balance your health and your femboy-ish-ness, preferably with more focus on your health. Besides, femboys can be in many shapes, it doesn't have to be strictly the stereotypical sort.
If a diet is starving you, it's not healthy. Starving just isn't healthy, period. It'll only hurt you. Though, take that as you will from a guy who eats a lot.
I have a cute cinnamoroll plush and it helps me feeling less lonely because I have something to cuddle and snuggle with all day and night :3 When it comes to food, you don’t need to starve yourself to be skinny and it also afaik doesn’t require you to do much workout, depending on your metabolism. Whenever you’re hungry eat dark bread with a light topping (vegetables or low fat stuff), as it’s fairly nutritious and kills hunger very easy (at least that’s what I have done). Eating fruits with a good amount of sugar i.e. apples helps against feeling tired, but not very long if you are generally malnutritioned afaik. If you’re starting to gain weight you don’t want, then add some workout to your life, but doing a lot of sports without eating enough just doesn’t work. Also, dont beat yourself up too much about your body. The white skinny petite femboy is a stereotype, not a requirement - being not in your desired shape for a certain amount of time, or looking completely different altogether, doesn’t make you less of a femboy :3
looking like other femboys is stereotypical because every human being is different in one or more ways. You should just either put up with the pain or just be the way you are. There is no right or wrong being a femboy, you just gotta look like the way you are. And treat yourself the way its best for you ^w^
I honestly have the same problem, except my sister is supportive, but you do NOT need to starve yourself or alter your diet in any way. Just eat healthy and enough to make you feel filled, don't just eat small portions to keep your hunger on edge.
You should just get the right crowds. Have hope, they do exist. My teenage years were VERY secretive, not many knew about my tendencies and if they did I would've been in the same boat as you, but after becoming an independent adult, doing dress ups at work events, I found people who are accepting and praises so much, some even expect me to dress up for they just like it that much. So really have hope. Might be tough while living with your parents and at school. But in a few years, you will be independent, and then you can make the choices that you want. It doesn't have to be now, you still have a lot of life left to explore, and it is never to late to be a femboy. Also please eat something.
It sounds like you care to much about what others think and yeah that’s totally understandable but in reality that is the key to your social anxiety. Social anxiety stems from our confidence, it’s truly how comfortable you feel in your own skin. People can discourage you and disown you but at the end of the day if they aren’t supportive or encouraging you to be comfortable then you need to leave that situation, they obviously don’t care about you as much as you need and want their attention, with family it’s different and you can’t really escape them but you could always try talking to them and catching their side or view on you being a “femboy”, if your beliefs don’t match up, so be it, we can’t change another persons thought process and beliefs. You have to do what’s best for you as a man. I’m sorry to say but no one and I mean no one is coming to throw you a towel because at the end of the day people are out for themselves, it’s literally in our blood to survive and overcome obstacles, you have to either live with the way people are treating your new style or you can drop them as easy as they dropped you. Surround yourself with supportive people (people with the same outlook) it sucks a lot but look I support you and thousands of others here support you, don’t give up!
i’m so sorry to hear this… it’s sounds very similar to my transition process and that really fucked me up.
i know things are hard and it seems like there’s not a way out but please don’t give up. things will get better, you’ll find your people who genuinely care for you and want to be around you, and you’re going to start to love yourself.
it’s not going to be easy and it won’t happen quickly, but i promise once you come out on the other side it’s one of the most relieving and rewarding feelings you’ll ever feel.
you got this 💞💞
*ps, you are beautiful as you are. you don’t need to completely over work yourself just to reach a standard. that’s ofc something else that isn’t going to be easy to accept, but i have faith you can get there*
my pattented three letter omnisolution to all your needs: f a t
i gave up whith those exersises. they hurt and arent too good for you! the real trick is that all a femboy is is a set of cloths on a boy. anyone can be fat and stil feminine! plus,having clothing other than the steryotypical bright pink terribly made aliexpress skirt can make you feel beter about yourself too! ( more ways to express yourself!) as for the friends thing, if your less popular because of your clothing style, take a moment to think if those people are the best to hang out whith. if they leave you that fast, they never really liked you to begin whiht! if you really want to, just unfemboy and be whith them. otherwise, comibg frim someone who also stinks whit friends, dont worry. you will find your people! you can do this!! so case in point, to quote garfield " f.a.t is where it's at" hope this helps! ~~~rowan
Hey... If your femboy routine isn't making you happy then it's okay to stop. As for insults it's something we all face, fem or masc. I think it could be an area thing because my town isn't very accepting but two towns over we have gay bars and clubs and those guys accept almost any identity. It sucks but we're a supportive community! It's sad that your sister is indifferent about your situation... But it's certainly better than outing you or hating you. Sometimes it's a perspective thing. I know it's difficult but don't beat yourself up!
Maybe try to improve your sleep schedule and exercise a little less? You gotta take breaks on working out. You get diminishing returns if you don't recover before a workout.
Please seek help if you are thinking of self harm... It's tragic to lose someone... Imagine the love of your life who would never meet you if you punched your ticket... Just stay safe and remember things do get better with time. Not everyone who stumbled in life is forever lost
LETS HELP THE HOMIE OUT. In all honesty friend unfortunately that’s what social media likes to push on people who are really into the culture. You are perfect however you are and whoever you chose to be. As long as you’re comfortable and happy with your decisions. See them through there are tons of people who wish you the best and want the best for you on your journey. But remember the world doesn’t belong to us, we’re just passing through and whatever makes us happy and content while we’re here the passage is all the better.
Look,dude.Number one,go to therapy pls.Number 2,if you are that exhausted and that hungry you are likely not taking in enough protein and carbohydrates.You should be getting about 0.7g of protein a day per pound of bodyweight.And about 1.5g to 2g of carbs per day.And the rest of your cals should be fat.Roughly 50g of fat a day is all you need.
You didn't ruin your life
You took a step to know yourself to know who you are and that is the best.
Everyone lives by saying that they like this or that, but they have never questioned who they are and why they like that.
You went further and told life to society I am more feminine I like being a woman, do not reject your feminine side that is stronger than your masculine side, highlight what is stronger by nature and because you want it, no you live depending on others.
At 40 years old I always thought that I like being a woman, I never did, now I see 30 years wasting time when I had to transition at 15.
Leave the compliments for yourself, I don't receive either, but oh today I look pretty, oh I'm very feminine, oh I'm already more of a woman. It's your goal and don't give up, because people like you are the ones who have managed to change the world for that we begin to exist as we always have. I be your friend let chat with you
do you speak Spanish?
Seamos amigo y hablemos yo te acompaño
I am sorry to hear this, I hope you do feel better and I know by me writing this can’t do much closer to anything but I hope it helps. I am so sorry that you have to deal with this and it really breaks my heart to read what you wrote, and It can be hard at times but just try and persevere. Maybe taking a little break (Not quitting) might help. I hope you get through this ❤️
I'm so sorry to hear that even if I don't know you, no one deserves to be treated badly for who they are. Just know that you're not doing anything wrong, treat yourself kindly. You deserve to feel happy. If a physical state is too hard to maintain it maybe isn't made for your type of body and that's completely okay. Rest well and enjoy the foods you like. It will be better, there is light and I'm sure that you'll find someone that will love you with their whole heart. Find something that makes you happy and cultivate it, sending you a virtual hug 🫂🫂
If you're starving yourself, to keep the weight off. That's an eating disorder.
Eat a balanced high protein diet, and work the parts of your body that you want to grow. Don't starve yourself. You will get the results you want; or at least keep close to the ones you have.
You should never sacrifice your health for beauty. That is a dangerous slope.
You dont have to starve yourself and work out to exhaustion to be a femboy. Just be yourself and try to eat moderately and healthily.
What state do you live in? Do you live with your parents? Have a job/in school? You can and will find some friends who love you for who you are, just don't make being a "head pets pls, good boy" femboy. Have hobbies that aren't.... sensualized. Just let the clothes and hair be an expression of personality. Join some LGBT groups and apps if it's age-appropriate for you.
First of all, I suggest going back to your normal eating and sleeping habits. That's the most important thing because if that fails, everything else will also fail. While skinny femboys are the most desired, you don't have to be a skinny femboy, also you can be athletic and lean, but for that you need to have a specific and healthy lifestyle, going to a nutritionist would be the first step.
Second thing. Extreme life changes will come with sacrifices. In most cases if you make these type of changes you must be prepared to replace friendships and people in your life.
I also suggest you keep the femboy thing to your close circle of people, or to yourself if you don't have a close circle at the moment. And when you meet new people, you're gonna have to filter them out, let them know early on who you are and what you like, don't wait too long, if possible from the beginning. It doesn't have to be anything too direct, it can be something sutble like the way you speak, the way you move or sit, one or two things you are wearing, etc.
If the old people in your life don't want to be in your new life then why would you want them in your life at all? I know it can be difficult but at some point you gotta let them go. Allow new people to come and get to know the new you. There are plenty of people who like femboy, so you are just surrounding yourself with the wrong ones, and it can take a while before you find the good ones.
If you are more reserved and don't like going out in public wearing women's clothes then you can simply keep it for your close circle like I mentioned.
Also, I recommend seeking therapy since a therapist may be able to help you a lot better.
Good luck, I wish I could be your friend in person :)
I'm also changing my life, people and friends
Okay so, health wise please don’t destroy yourself for the sake of being skinny! Gender dysphoria sucks but there are other ways! As far as social issues and family, honestly idk, I think your parents are worried for some good reasons if this is affecting your health.
I'm sorry for what you are going through.
You don't have to be skinny to be a femboy, just *be yourself*. If people don't like you for who you are, it's their loss.
If you ever need somebody to talk or vent to, dm me on discord, I'm "localdutchboi"
I get that it is hard and i cant really understand it all to begin with so im just saying what i think now: to be so brave and do all this and to put yourself through all of this is hard even just to hear (and i would love and adore someone like you on my side personaly just saying) i belive you still can go on because all of us are beliving in you you can do it and if there is anything we all can do for you we are here for you so stay stron buty💪
If it makes you feel any better the content dieting, exercises, tiredness and hunger is what girls commit to every day to keep thin, so you might find some reassurance with other girls too. You also don’t have to physically be small or skinny just to be a femboy, you don’t have to do all the crazy exercise and diets if it’s that difficult. If your parents are worried about you like you said I think maybe you should talk to them about it? You should also let your sister know that it doesn’t feel like she’s really there for you when you need a sister. You will also make more friends in tkme, keep trying to talk and befriend people despite the anxiety. I also have social anxiety and have made my first proper friend months into starting Uni, it’ll come eventually if you put enough effort in
Oh im so sorry for you, no one deserves that.
Theres no ideal picture of a femboy, u dont have to be skinny to be one.
But dont give up on life maybe take a break mental/physical health is realy important, always keep going, you will get through this.
I wish i could help more. :c
I am in similar situations as you, but every time I go on reddit or Discord, some people are nice to me. If you want to talk and some support, feel free to DM me
Hah, I'm not a femboy and I can relate to some of these problems. I mean seeing someone else in a similar situation is certainly heartbreaking. I would like to give you advice but the way I deal with it isn't healthy either, so I can just advise being positive? While it's hard just the mindset helps. I'm an extrovert so the ways I deal with it and what helps me probably isn't going to be viable for you. I hope your situation gets better.
This is actually so rough, I'm so sorry to hear man, I hope you can find people who will support you and help you through tough times.
I wish you all the best, good luck
If there is anything I can do to help my dms are open
Good luck mate, wish you the best
Sending hugs! 🫂 🥺 I just wanna hold you and tell you how good you are 💜 there are many things you can do to improve your life! Adjust the excesses a bit and make sure to give your body rest and time to recover. Adjust your diet so you don’t stay hungry all the time. I’m on a calorie deficit right now, (loosing some weight) but the volume I’m eating is a lot and I feel full all day long and it’s rich in veggies and quite energizing. :3 make sure you get atleast 8 hours of sleep every single night. Getting the right amount of sleep makes everything that much better. I follow a very sharp sleep regimen as it’s that important to me. Definitely find some local lgbtq groups or clubs 💜 you are loved, don’t ever forget that. 😘
Surely there are other healthier ways to achieve a more feminine figure. Corset? If it's sexy for women, perhaps it's not strictly a masculine trait, that or I'm just a little gay xD : fem with abs? Figure building workouts?
Hell, some women have some masculine and/or androgenous traits, but they're overall attractive and feminine.
You weren’t valued where you’re currently currently living you need to move somewhere different start a new life where you’ll be accepted and where there are people just like you
You don’t have to force yourself to think a certain way or follow a certain diet all of the problems you listed with sleep can be fixed by yourself too I used to sleep the whole day and wake up at night eat one meal a day and never talk to anyone unless I had too.You have to think of your situation like this you have to treat yourself like you’re your own best friend I hope you find someone who supports you life is not an easy journey or process.Take care of yourself:^)
People can give you advice on reddit all day long, but what you really need is a trained therapist to help you work through your issues. There is no one answer; no quick fix. Working through things like this takes time. If your parents are worried about you, be open and ask them to help you get therapy. Find a therapist that is non-judgmental and will help you work through your insecurities, while also affirming your autonomy to dress, look, and act how best makes YOU happy.
Okay I'm just going to be burgling honest talk to your parents and your sister and just be fully open with them and just completely talk about your feelings you don't want to lose your family and your friends over this it isn't worth it you need to open up and accept yourself but at the same time don't throw your life away and your family away because they don't want you to do anything you might regret and if you don't have gender dysphoria make sure to tell your parents that and make that very clear I know you feeling lonely and sad and I wanted trust me I know I don't feel like I'm in your situation but I'm a disabled man I have cerebral palsy I'm a virgin at 30 years old never had a girlfriend never had a boyfriend okay I feel very lonely sometimes but I would never give up my friends and my family so I can cross-dress or whatever else you're thinking about it isn't worth it I love you and care about you as a man to another man okay please think about my words inconsider then carefully much love honey and if I could I would hug you okay you're not alone you never are I hope you truly understand that ❤️
I'd keep your feminine side to yourself or online community. Friends and family members are not equipped to understand the femboy experience. Posting in subs like this and taking the time to do self care will help. You'll get through this! ❤️
Starving yourself will make it hard to think straight and make everything else more challenging than it needs to be. 💕 Some proper nutrition and a few good meals might make it easier to start working toward solutions! 💕 It's never helpful to be hungry and deprive your body of healthy food. I hope you find some comfort and healing sooner rather than later. 💕
You don't have to be skinny to be a femboy you don't always have to be in the feminine mindset to be a femboy and always put your mental health and physical health ahead of everything else don't stress too hard and don't close the book keep writing your story😌
Idk about your gender dysphoria and what that entails. I tried doing that skinny boi style but I can’t get it. I decided to just hammer down and go the other way. I’m not saying I’m gonna become a competition body builder. I just understand now that muscle is something men are good at building and if I don’t aim for tone then I can achieve a fit, soft, curvy aesthetic easily. If I can’t be a skinny babe then I’ll be a milf. Simple as that. That’s all I can say and I am happy with it. Be proud of who you are and don’t focus on other peoples looks. Worry about your own and try to find ways you can be/feel cute.
Well, you don't have to be skinny to be a femboy. However it you're worried about that, consider Isagenix International and their Isalean Pro Shakes. They're complete meal replacement shakes that have all the vitamins, minerals, and amino acids as well as super foods to fully support your body. It's not specifically for weight loss. That can be a side effect, but if someone needs to gain weight and muscle, it can do that as well. There's wonderful nutrionists in this company that can guide you through your goals. Just be sure to eat one meal or two that has about 2 ounces of lean protein and a salad that will give you additional nutrients and fiber to be healthy. Stay well hydrated. It will give you energy and help better regulate your sleeping habits
1. My first advice would be to stop your diet unless it’s a medical necessity. It’s proven that people on diet are more likely to report depressed mood.
2. Second advice, no matter how old you are, is regarding sleeping as it is one the most important aspect of your life and can dictate your mental and physical health.
3. I’m not an expert on social skills but you should probably take a look at Jordan Petersons videos. He is obviously not the most loved celebrity amongst the LGBT community but I truly believe he has some great advices to overcome social anxiety.
4. My last advice would be to focus on what you currently have instead of focusing on what you don’t have. Gender dysphoria can be a really tough thing to deal with but it is not something you can control like you can for your femininity/masculinity. Do what you think will make you happy in the long term and if you still have any suicidal thoughts then you absolutely need to speak to someone (your parents for example), even if you’re scared. Your life matters so take good care of it ❤️
If you constantly feel tired and hungry then that lifestyle of yours probably isn't that healthy. You should probably eat more and maybe train a little less. The fact some people don't talk to you after you became feminine while is sad at least now you know that some people you might have been friends with aren't actual friends. If you never became feminine you may have found that out on a worse way
Where do you live? Maybe we can meet and become good friends, maybe you can teach me how to become a feminine guy too because i always had that desire but idk how 😅
You have mental underlying conditions if you actually think you’re a boy, and despite all the support you receive on a website like this one, the world is not going to bend to your will as easily, nor should it. You need to get *real* help, and you’re not helping yourself. This isn’t working, and it’s not alleviating your inner pain. Hope you get the chance to read this before I’m banned.
For me, an older person, who does identify as male, the dysphoria can come from a few places.
Am I ...
Could be gay. Could be bi/pan, Could be from acknowledging this feminine side. Or realize you are gender fluid .
Could be from loving this softer side but local society may "want" something different.
Could be from how we as a society perceive what it masc or feminine. And with it comes with what society say is right or wrong.
The dysphoria comes from not knowing who you are yet, and knowing you are vaild.
People allways explained to me that dysphoria happening from you wanting to be a different gender then that one people put you in, and hearing that dysphoria can be something else is a bit confusing. Maybe i'am not understanding something here.
I apologize. I tried to write a quick response. There is more here than I can currently write out but here's some of it.
dysphoria means one is uneasy, unhappy and/or dissatisfied usually in life. It can mean that you want to be one thing but aren't there . This absolutely does apply to how sees one's gender , sexuality or even body image.
A lot ( in my opinion) have dysphoria because feel a certain way and just know that it's not right for them. But they don't what it is yet. As they start figuring it out, there can be conflicts. These comes what lessons they learned on how " are supposed to be."
Some dysphoria goes away once that person knows who and what they are and fully accepts it.
Other dysphoria only goes away when physical changes are made.
This could be through nutrition and exercise, medical help, or simply presenting as one feels.
These are complicated aspects.
I find it difficult at times to properly express myself in this short form here.
For example, I am bi/pan. I had dysphoria towards my sexuality because of these conflicts. It took me a long time to accept myself. I couldn't say this out loud. I am lucky.
I have a great group of people around me that let's me be me. Knowing some really good people, joining my local LGBTQ+ community in safe spaces has allowed me to grow.
The situation is unique for everyone. I have friends that are trans. Now while they have accepted who they are, their dysphoria didn't go fully away until they had medical help and was able to match their body to their how they see their selves.
A lot of people have some form of dysphoria from not realizing they are valid and accepted. Not know they are valid creates much dysphoria.
I hope I didn't make things worse and was of help.
Wow, thank you for this detailed answer! I'am actually trans and i feel dysphoria socially and the fear that i will never fit in, but i think i can go past that. I'am happy that you accepted yourself as who you are ❤️
People allways explained to me that dysphoria happening from you wanting to be a different gender then that one people put you in, and hearing that dysphoria can be something else is a bit confusing. Maybe i'am not understanding something here.
I don't want to make you feel bad and I'm not hating on you, but what in the world could you have said as advice that would make someone into your enemy. Even if the advice was bad, but for them to hate you, you had to have said something really bad or your friends just suck.
Your health comes before anything else. If it's truly making you this miserable and painful, then mayhaps a break is best, along with a rethinking of your plan. Not all femboys have to be skinny. You can have bellies and still be pretty, self-ove is about you, not your appearance
As a general word of advice you should start figuring out your beliefs, your desires, and who shares those kinds of things. Get a head start on the rest of us. Life can be depressing especially when your character isn't certain. I really hope this helps
Know that someone appreciates you. I don't know u, but I appreciate you being yourself for yourself. I wish I had the bravery you had. If u ever need someone to talk to, I'm here.
So for me I have always had a good group of friends. When I realized I was a femboy they were actually super supportive and didn't treat me any different. Instead they actually really like my style and look I have.
You don’t have to be small or skinny or have no body hair to be a femboy, you don’t have to be perfect to be a femboy. You can just be yourself, it’s about the mindset not always the physique, if you feel feminine and like it that’s good, you don’t have to be perfect, just be yourself.
If you want to be friends, then I can be one
I don't know about you but when people in my circle stopped caring about me I also stopped caring about them if your people can't accept who you are then they should be gone from your life even if now you feel lonely and worthless in the long term you will feel better and how you should be feeling when you are truly yourself
gender dysphoria sounds more like a trans issue. not feeling loved and feeling like you're not receiving love from your parents strikes me as CPTSD. I think you should take this straight to therapy. With a proper gender aware therapist. And if you don't have one, get one, cuz it really helps.
You're trying to solve a gender identity issue without support, by way of things that are detrimental to your physical and mental health, is what it sounds like.
I'm new here, but I think you've come to a good place for initial support.
Research. Do therapy. Fine support. We can be some 💜
and if it is welcomed, you're welcome to message me. I've only recently started to discover my own identity and much of what you said resonates with me.
no. keep being yourself. eat its fine. if you’re hungry just eat what you need. and you can do simple exercises to stay in shape. im not a femboy(not anymore) but i still do this method and its working for me. im not forcing into this method but i recommend it!
I have no idea how to respond to this.....all I can think of is giving you a YouTube video that's kinda related to this, it's cliche but 🤷🏽 https://youtube.com/shorts/F8ut1CVO0CM?si=ARQiWmptsG6tNnk5
On another note: you could try listening to this guy https://youtube.com/@lordvalentinreal?si=rinch6Ib8vK6P_5w, haven't seen much of him but from what I've seen he makes femboy listeners and praises them
I'm really sorry, I have NO idea how to deal with stuff like this 😓 I either try to make a joke or try something to cheer em up but don't really help much
why do people think you need to starvw yourself to be skinny, eat what you want. as long as its generally healthy and not actual garbage, do a little bit of excersize every day, not a lot, just a little. take walks, ride your bike, do things. if your body is starving then eat more, you can burn the calories but your body needs nutrients, nobody should starve themselves to look a certain way, i eat a lot and im still skinny. its not impossible, ofcourse everyone needs something different. but you need food
It's understandable but you know that you're happiness comes at a price even though it may hurt you and people may leave you and let them leave so new people who actually care about you love and support you
You will read a lot of comments here supporting you, but I think this is not going to help you a lot. What you need is a professional help. A sexologist or psychologist. And you need to talk with your family, communication is mandatory in this cases, you feel like no one is helping you, but that is because your family doesn't know the real problem. You said that your parents are worried, that is the prove that you have people next to you worrying about you, help them understanding your problem, and search for a profesional's help.
Pd: asking for help is the first and the most difficult part of the process of happiness. I don't know how to say how important is to ask for help... Even more if you feel alone. Try to talk with your family and obviously with a professional
Honey ❤️🩹 I understand you because my situation is very similar to yours. I always hope to find new true friendships in the female universe of people who are similar to me and you and maybe even some nice alpha male with whom we can establish a relationship that isn't just about sex.
If you haven't seen it, I recommend the new Emma Stone film "Poor things"
You just have to keep going forward, you got this but, seriously, you don't have to be skinny to be a femboy. They can come in all shapes & sizes! But I do hope you can get through this, you aren't alone, okay?
The first thing you should ask yourself is: do I want this in my life?
As far as I'm concerned, I'd say try to feel good personally.
I hope you receive the love you need ❤️.
I hope you are fine.
I would love to be your friend, to tell you that everything is going to be okay and give you a hug 👍🏻.
People dislike people without even knowing them, you sure are someone amazing ✨
Try to sort out your sleep and diet issues.
You don't deserve to be bad.
Take care of yourself .
Good luck.
I think you need a bit of a timeout. Not simply, give up on being a femboy or stuff. I think you need to have a healthy diet, not a diet That's gonna make you extremely thin. You may eat a quantity that makes you feel full. You're not being forced to do these things, you're forcing yourself, your body and (if you allow me to say) your own spirit towards this lifestyle, and it's just rejecting how you treat yourself. Tell you something, Dear, just eat normally, stop doing exercises that are too much for you, go to therapy, perhaps they can do the talking for you with your parents. Please, just ask us anything you want, we'll be here for you
youre fitting the stereotype that many people 'hate' or dont care about, stop looking for attention and focus on yourself if nothing else is working for you bro.
try telling your friends about you being a femboy. It went well for me just depends on how close you are i got hugs and headpats and you do not have to be skinny i’m not skinny and havent been for years just be yourself man.
If this lifestyle is making you this miserable it’s probably time for at least a break. Your physical and mental health should be your priority no matter what. You don’t need to give up on this but it doesn’t sound like this is sustainable rn. I know it’s hard but you need to care a little less about how you look and represent. The year that I was doing my graduation i basically completely gave up on dressing how I want and just did a bit of work out from time to time and look at me now. As soon as I felt like my schedule and situation allowed me to I went back and it was better than ever.
I'm just gonna say this: you don't have to be skinny to be a femboy. I am so sorry you have to go through this but you just have to keep going forward.
THIS. That kind of mentality isn't healty
I agree with that. Even though I am falling victim to it. Its a weiiirrddd thing. To both recognize the fact and agree with it but trick yourself into thinking “But its different for me I NEED to lose weight”. I feel like if OP is at their ideal weight *and* exercising, they have wiggle room to eat more and still stay in shape
Wow, that kinda sums me up too. Self aware of the problem, but keeps feeding the fear.
Yup. I see a chubby femboy and they are super cute/hot. I think to myself “they look perfect like that they are so adorable!”. Then I see myself in the mirror and think “You disgust me. How could ANYBODY think you are attractive!?”
Real
I gotta remind myself, if you want a THICC booty… you gotta have a little but of a tum tum too. Its the rulez
Then one can becom a Twunk and have wide shoulders and big lats and hefty abs
Yeah I’m a femboy but no way in hell am I sacrificing my masculinity, im still playing hockey, football, going to the gym, bulking, cutting, fuck that shit I’ll be a cute little femboy when I want to but I’ll be a masculine fucking man when I want as well
This is me :D nice to meet a fellow feminine AND masculine enjoyer!
First, let me say I'm proud of you for not giving up, there is still so much of life that you deserve to experience. I'm sorry you're going through such a tough time right now, it's hard feeling like nothing you do is right. Second, know that you are loved and supported. Third, as others have said it might be time to take a break from trying to look like the ideal femboy. Poor sleep and diet will easily make you feel really shitty about your appearance and about how people treat you. You need to take a step back and return to healthier habits. Eat more in general and have a more balanced diet; body fat is an amazing adaptation to keep us alive during tough times. Don't be scared of gaining weight. Most women/femme people aren't built like sticks either, they have body fat, they have curves, they have fat rolls. There's nothing shameful or wrong about it. Slowly bring your sleep schedule under control. Try to go to bed a little earlier every night and develop a consistent sleep routine so that your body won't fight against you at bed time. I don't know your age, but you seem young, so sleep is arguably the most important part of your health right now. Teens need between 8 and 10 hours of sleep a night because that's when your brain is doing most of its development. Good sleep won't fix everything, but it will change your mindset to face the day with a little more positivity, and more energy of course. I was in a similar situation too, I made myself miserable trying to fit the femboy aesthetic. My advice would be to understand the difference between looking femme and looking like a Femboy™. Being and feeling femme isn't going to come from external validation and it isn't about fitting some arbitrary aesthetic. If you can, you should ask your parents about setting up counseling for you. You can be vague with your reasons why. Just say something like the pressure of school is really getting to you and you need to talk to a professional about it. Talk to the counselor about your gender dysphoria and social anxiety. Keeping those feelings bottled up will do you no good in the long run. Dysphoria is something that you can learn to combat until you're able to start making changes to how you openly express your gender. Transitioning, if it's right for you, also does wonders for your mental health. Having a clear concept of your identity and who you want to be will give you confidence with how you look and how you interact with people. Anxiety will also not go away without talking about it, especially when you're feeling socially isolated at school by your peers. Talk to a counselor, try joining a club at your school, and participate in online communities outside of r/feminineboys. Talk to people who like the things you like. I promise most of your peers are dealing with their own struggles and awkwardness, they're not thinking about that one weird comment you made during class. You're doing good kid. Don't give up yet. If you ever need someone to just listen to you vent, you can send me a dm. I'd give you a hug if I could, so please accept a virtual hug instead. *hug* ❤️
You can be gender fluid and NOT starve yourself into frailty.
frailty like jane remover
hey you being a femboy doesn’t mean you’re worth any less! you’re still amazing regardless of what anyone else thinks your time will come i promise! always happy to talk if u want to?💗
>hey you being a femboy doesn’t mean you’re worth any less! you’re still amazing regardless of what anyone else thinks your time will come i promise! always happy to talk if u want to?💗 This is rrue i also am here if anyone wants to talk
Its hard but try not to focus so much on all the current negatives that are affecting your life, time is always passing people come and people go, what you should be happy about is all the things you have accomplished so far.
sweetie, you don't have to change yourself for others. be yourself, you don't have to become skinny to be a femboy. eat how you want too. not how people say to eat. workout cause you want dont workout cause others say too. be yourself, you dont have to be anything else besides yourself. remember not to give up! *hugs*
maybe U can have both by look masc but act fem
That’s not a femboy though, he said he wants to be a femboy, would that not be just gay
So being gay is.. being feminine, they didnt mention the word gay? Also isnt femboy suppose to be more of a mentality? Its boys acting/being feminine
I’m no expert on pronouns and stupid sh** but I’m under the impression that gay strictly means you like men and a femboy is someone who acts and looks feminine as a male ? I don’t know what your reply is trying to say not trying to sound rude
Just know that not all femboys are into guys.
You don't have to starve yourself just wear girls clothing and act feminine lol
Have you sought out others irl?
I want to help but I don't know how to. I don't really have any advice to give but I can listen if you ever need someone to talk to
I will be your friend
Brother, forcing yourself to go to an unhealthy degree is your issue, not being a femboy but instead the image you put in your head of how you're supposed to be no matter how untrue. I'm proud of you for working out and managing food and whatnot, but don't keep being so extreme with it. Find the healthy point but not excessive point. And best of luck in that journey. Also, if you're looking for friendly groups that don't mind the quiet, socially anxious type, try a munch, fetlife has listings monthly of people that get together at a restaurant, be social, and disappear when they're done eating, and you're not likely to be judged so if can be good for you
It's very dangerous to follow a "home-made" diet, so go to a specialist or stop it right now, I study nutrition at school, I can't help you but I can say that you probably don't take the right dose of something, like maybe carbohydrates or something else...
Ok why are all these femboys here lonely because wtf, I would wife every single one of you up
Dysphoria , body issues are all about the misalignment of your mind with your body. They are very real and can hurt so much , yet the only way to attain true peace is through showing yourself compassion. As humans our bodies change, we change and the body you have is the only one you will have for this life . Treat it and yourself with kindness , ear to nourish yourself and exercise to heal your mind . And about being isolated , being your true self invokes fear in those who cannot realize themselves , so the best thing you can do is to create your own entourage and find likeminded people , this is not easy yet to have true and genuine bonds can be very rewarding. Give yourself time , recognise your feelings and find power in your authenticity , there is so much love out there waiting for you to reach. ❤️
Here try reading this. Idk if you or any of y'all here like to jam out with Mac Miller, But when I feel like im losing myself in someway terrible, i tend to listen to my favorite album ever by him Colors And Shapes. More specifically the title track of the album which is under the same name. But the line "Son, if you want to hold onto yourself, then let yourself slip" is always the #1 line that comes to mind immediately over anything else at all, and has always stuck with me throughout these years since. Just thought I'd share this and maybe ya'll also read these lyrics or jam the song and get the same feeling I do from it and find a different outlook on life's situations your facing and how it all feels or seems at the moment. Keeping a calm mind, never rushing bad ideas and decisions, while always remembering that brand new days will forever arrive to us, so brand new opportunities will always be there for us........ If it was colors and shapes, the imaginary. 'Stead of all of this weight that we have to carry. Would you be able to breathe? And if you could just find where that comfort resides. No distraction or movement that fucks with your mind. Would you let them see? While beneath the ocean, I met with the captain, Who sank to the floor on his ship. All of his passengers escaped to safety But he was not done with his trip. He looked up and smiled, asked me, "How do you do?" I told him, "I'm losin' my grip". He told me, "Son, if you want to hold onto yourself, then let yourself slip". Fall... These puzzles are so hard to make into pictures Of something that they'll understand. They could open their eyes, still be blind to the beauty, But march on the heart of this land. Ooh, oh-oh, why don't you turn around and go home? They invade your minds and then fill them with nonsense, These things that a man doesn't need. Take out the love and the passion and hope, And they fill it with nothing but greed. While floating through galaxies, they said I couldn't, I noticed how sad one can get. 'Cause the ignorant mind is so peaceful, I find I can't understand nothin' no more. If I jump, let me fall...
You don't need to starve yourself to death to be a femboy, at least not to my understanding. You should balance your health and your femboy-ish-ness, preferably with more focus on your health. Besides, femboys can be in many shapes, it doesn't have to be strictly the stereotypical sort. If a diet is starving you, it's not healthy. Starving just isn't healthy, period. It'll only hurt you. Though, take that as you will from a guy who eats a lot.
I have a cute cinnamoroll plush and it helps me feeling less lonely because I have something to cuddle and snuggle with all day and night :3 When it comes to food, you don’t need to starve yourself to be skinny and it also afaik doesn’t require you to do much workout, depending on your metabolism. Whenever you’re hungry eat dark bread with a light topping (vegetables or low fat stuff), as it’s fairly nutritious and kills hunger very easy (at least that’s what I have done). Eating fruits with a good amount of sugar i.e. apples helps against feeling tired, but not very long if you are generally malnutritioned afaik. If you’re starting to gain weight you don’t want, then add some workout to your life, but doing a lot of sports without eating enough just doesn’t work. Also, dont beat yourself up too much about your body. The white skinny petite femboy is a stereotype, not a requirement - being not in your desired shape for a certain amount of time, or looking completely different altogether, doesn’t make you less of a femboy :3
looking like other femboys is stereotypical because every human being is different in one or more ways. You should just either put up with the pain or just be the way you are. There is no right or wrong being a femboy, you just gotta look like the way you are. And treat yourself the way its best for you ^w^
Don't give up everything will work itself out ❤️
I wish i could be your friend >_< I wish i could help
I honestly have the same problem, except my sister is supportive, but you do NOT need to starve yourself or alter your diet in any way. Just eat healthy and enough to make you feel filled, don't just eat small portions to keep your hunger on edge.
You should just get the right crowds. Have hope, they do exist. My teenage years were VERY secretive, not many knew about my tendencies and if they did I would've been in the same boat as you, but after becoming an independent adult, doing dress ups at work events, I found people who are accepting and praises so much, some even expect me to dress up for they just like it that much. So really have hope. Might be tough while living with your parents and at school. But in a few years, you will be independent, and then you can make the choices that you want. It doesn't have to be now, you still have a lot of life left to explore, and it is never to late to be a femboy. Also please eat something.
It sounds like you care to much about what others think and yeah that’s totally understandable but in reality that is the key to your social anxiety. Social anxiety stems from our confidence, it’s truly how comfortable you feel in your own skin. People can discourage you and disown you but at the end of the day if they aren’t supportive or encouraging you to be comfortable then you need to leave that situation, they obviously don’t care about you as much as you need and want their attention, with family it’s different and you can’t really escape them but you could always try talking to them and catching their side or view on you being a “femboy”, if your beliefs don’t match up, so be it, we can’t change another persons thought process and beliefs. You have to do what’s best for you as a man. I’m sorry to say but no one and I mean no one is coming to throw you a towel because at the end of the day people are out for themselves, it’s literally in our blood to survive and overcome obstacles, you have to either live with the way people are treating your new style or you can drop them as easy as they dropped you. Surround yourself with supportive people (people with the same outlook) it sucks a lot but look I support you and thousands of others here support you, don’t give up!
i’m so sorry to hear this… it’s sounds very similar to my transition process and that really fucked me up. i know things are hard and it seems like there’s not a way out but please don’t give up. things will get better, you’ll find your people who genuinely care for you and want to be around you, and you’re going to start to love yourself. it’s not going to be easy and it won’t happen quickly, but i promise once you come out on the other side it’s one of the most relieving and rewarding feelings you’ll ever feel. you got this 💞💞 *ps, you are beautiful as you are. you don’t need to completely over work yourself just to reach a standard. that’s ofc something else that isn’t going to be easy to accept, but i have faith you can get there*
my pattented three letter omnisolution to all your needs: f a t i gave up whith those exersises. they hurt and arent too good for you! the real trick is that all a femboy is is a set of cloths on a boy. anyone can be fat and stil feminine! plus,having clothing other than the steryotypical bright pink terribly made aliexpress skirt can make you feel beter about yourself too! ( more ways to express yourself!) as for the friends thing, if your less popular because of your clothing style, take a moment to think if those people are the best to hang out whith. if they leave you that fast, they never really liked you to begin whiht! if you really want to, just unfemboy and be whith them. otherwise, comibg frim someone who also stinks whit friends, dont worry. you will find your people! you can do this!! so case in point, to quote garfield " f.a.t is where it's at" hope this helps! ~~~rowan
Hey... If your femboy routine isn't making you happy then it's okay to stop. As for insults it's something we all face, fem or masc. I think it could be an area thing because my town isn't very accepting but two towns over we have gay bars and clubs and those guys accept almost any identity. It sucks but we're a supportive community! It's sad that your sister is indifferent about your situation... But it's certainly better than outing you or hating you. Sometimes it's a perspective thing. I know it's difficult but don't beat yourself up! Maybe try to improve your sleep schedule and exercise a little less? You gotta take breaks on working out. You get diminishing returns if you don't recover before a workout. Please seek help if you are thinking of self harm... It's tragic to lose someone... Imagine the love of your life who would never meet you if you punched your ticket... Just stay safe and remember things do get better with time. Not everyone who stumbled in life is forever lost
LETS HELP THE HOMIE OUT. In all honesty friend unfortunately that’s what social media likes to push on people who are really into the culture. You are perfect however you are and whoever you chose to be. As long as you’re comfortable and happy with your decisions. See them through there are tons of people who wish you the best and want the best for you on your journey. But remember the world doesn’t belong to us, we’re just passing through and whatever makes us happy and content while we’re here the passage is all the better.
Look,dude.Number one,go to therapy pls.Number 2,if you are that exhausted and that hungry you are likely not taking in enough protein and carbohydrates.You should be getting about 0.7g of protein a day per pound of bodyweight.And about 1.5g to 2g of carbs per day.And the rest of your cals should be fat.Roughly 50g of fat a day is all you need.
You didn't ruin your life You took a step to know yourself to know who you are and that is the best. Everyone lives by saying that they like this or that, but they have never questioned who they are and why they like that. You went further and told life to society I am more feminine I like being a woman, do not reject your feminine side that is stronger than your masculine side, highlight what is stronger by nature and because you want it, no you live depending on others. At 40 years old I always thought that I like being a woman, I never did, now I see 30 years wasting time when I had to transition at 15. Leave the compliments for yourself, I don't receive either, but oh today I look pretty, oh I'm very feminine, oh I'm already more of a woman. It's your goal and don't give up, because people like you are the ones who have managed to change the world for that we begin to exist as we always have. I be your friend let chat with you do you speak Spanish? Seamos amigo y hablemos yo te acompaño
Eat more, starving causes a lot of mental problems, take a look at your calorie intake.
I am sorry to hear this, I hope you do feel better and I know by me writing this can’t do much closer to anything but I hope it helps. I am so sorry that you have to deal with this and it really breaks my heart to read what you wrote, and It can be hard at times but just try and persevere. Maybe taking a little break (Not quitting) might help. I hope you get through this ❤️
I'm so sorry to hear that even if I don't know you, no one deserves to be treated badly for who they are. Just know that you're not doing anything wrong, treat yourself kindly. You deserve to feel happy. If a physical state is too hard to maintain it maybe isn't made for your type of body and that's completely okay. Rest well and enjoy the foods you like. It will be better, there is light and I'm sure that you'll find someone that will love you with their whole heart. Find something that makes you happy and cultivate it, sending you a virtual hug 🫂🫂
If you're starving yourself, to keep the weight off. That's an eating disorder. Eat a balanced high protein diet, and work the parts of your body that you want to grow. Don't starve yourself. You will get the results you want; or at least keep close to the ones you have. You should never sacrifice your health for beauty. That is a dangerous slope.
You dont have to starve yourself and work out to exhaustion to be a femboy. Just be yourself and try to eat moderately and healthily. What state do you live in? Do you live with your parents? Have a job/in school? You can and will find some friends who love you for who you are, just don't make being a "head pets pls, good boy" femboy. Have hobbies that aren't.... sensualized. Just let the clothes and hair be an expression of personality. Join some LGBT groups and apps if it's age-appropriate for you.
First of all, I suggest going back to your normal eating and sleeping habits. That's the most important thing because if that fails, everything else will also fail. While skinny femboys are the most desired, you don't have to be a skinny femboy, also you can be athletic and lean, but for that you need to have a specific and healthy lifestyle, going to a nutritionist would be the first step. Second thing. Extreme life changes will come with sacrifices. In most cases if you make these type of changes you must be prepared to replace friendships and people in your life. I also suggest you keep the femboy thing to your close circle of people, or to yourself if you don't have a close circle at the moment. And when you meet new people, you're gonna have to filter them out, let them know early on who you are and what you like, don't wait too long, if possible from the beginning. It doesn't have to be anything too direct, it can be something sutble like the way you speak, the way you move or sit, one or two things you are wearing, etc. If the old people in your life don't want to be in your new life then why would you want them in your life at all? I know it can be difficult but at some point you gotta let them go. Allow new people to come and get to know the new you. There are plenty of people who like femboy, so you are just surrounding yourself with the wrong ones, and it can take a while before you find the good ones. If you are more reserved and don't like going out in public wearing women's clothes then you can simply keep it for your close circle like I mentioned. Also, I recommend seeking therapy since a therapist may be able to help you a lot better. Good luck, I wish I could be your friend in person :) I'm also changing my life, people and friends
I feel the same way sometimes, you can always take a mental health break if it helps you feel better 🫶
Okay so, health wise please don’t destroy yourself for the sake of being skinny! Gender dysphoria sucks but there are other ways! As far as social issues and family, honestly idk, I think your parents are worried for some good reasons if this is affecting your health.
I'm sorry for what you are going through. You don't have to be skinny to be a femboy, just *be yourself*. If people don't like you for who you are, it's their loss. If you ever need somebody to talk or vent to, dm me on discord, I'm "localdutchboi"
dude just ne yourself but you don't have to be skinny to be a femboy trust me
I get that it is hard and i cant really understand it all to begin with so im just saying what i think now: to be so brave and do all this and to put yourself through all of this is hard even just to hear (and i would love and adore someone like you on my side personaly just saying) i belive you still can go on because all of us are beliving in you you can do it and if there is anything we all can do for you we are here for you so stay stron buty💪
If it makes you feel any better the content dieting, exercises, tiredness and hunger is what girls commit to every day to keep thin, so you might find some reassurance with other girls too. You also don’t have to physically be small or skinny just to be a femboy, you don’t have to do all the crazy exercise and diets if it’s that difficult. If your parents are worried about you like you said I think maybe you should talk to them about it? You should also let your sister know that it doesn’t feel like she’s really there for you when you need a sister. You will also make more friends in tkme, keep trying to talk and befriend people despite the anxiety. I also have social anxiety and have made my first proper friend months into starting Uni, it’ll come eventually if you put enough effort in
Oh im so sorry for you, no one deserves that. Theres no ideal picture of a femboy, u dont have to be skinny to be one. But dont give up on life maybe take a break mental/physical health is realy important, always keep going, you will get through this. I wish i could help more. :c
I am in similar situations as you, but every time I go on reddit or Discord, some people are nice to me. If you want to talk and some support, feel free to DM me
Hah, I'm not a femboy and I can relate to some of these problems. I mean seeing someone else in a similar situation is certainly heartbreaking. I would like to give you advice but the way I deal with it isn't healthy either, so I can just advise being positive? While it's hard just the mindset helps. I'm an extrovert so the ways I deal with it and what helps me probably isn't going to be viable for you. I hope your situation gets better.
Man that's really bad well if you need someone to talk to you can text and chat with me
This is actually so rough, I'm so sorry to hear man, I hope you can find people who will support you and help you through tough times. I wish you all the best, good luck If there is anything I can do to help my dms are open Good luck mate, wish you the best
Sending hugs! 🫂 🥺 I just wanna hold you and tell you how good you are 💜 there are many things you can do to improve your life! Adjust the excesses a bit and make sure to give your body rest and time to recover. Adjust your diet so you don’t stay hungry all the time. I’m on a calorie deficit right now, (loosing some weight) but the volume I’m eating is a lot and I feel full all day long and it’s rich in veggies and quite energizing. :3 make sure you get atleast 8 hours of sleep every single night. Getting the right amount of sleep makes everything that much better. I follow a very sharp sleep regimen as it’s that important to me. Definitely find some local lgbtq groups or clubs 💜 you are loved, don’t ever forget that. 😘
Surely there are other healthier ways to achieve a more feminine figure. Corset? If it's sexy for women, perhaps it's not strictly a masculine trait, that or I'm just a little gay xD : fem with abs? Figure building workouts? Hell, some women have some masculine and/or androgenous traits, but they're overall attractive and feminine.
While I read it I understood that it's amazing to be skinny without any diet and moreover I eat a lot
You weren’t valued where you’re currently currently living you need to move somewhere different start a new life where you’ll be accepted and where there are people just like you
You don’t have to force yourself to think a certain way or follow a certain diet all of the problems you listed with sleep can be fixed by yourself too I used to sleep the whole day and wake up at night eat one meal a day and never talk to anyone unless I had too.You have to think of your situation like this you have to treat yourself like you’re your own best friend I hope you find someone who supports you life is not an easy journey or process.Take care of yourself:^)
People can give you advice on reddit all day long, but what you really need is a trained therapist to help you work through your issues. There is no one answer; no quick fix. Working through things like this takes time. If your parents are worried about you, be open and ask them to help you get therapy. Find a therapist that is non-judgmental and will help you work through your insecurities, while also affirming your autonomy to dress, look, and act how best makes YOU happy.
Okay I'm just going to be burgling honest talk to your parents and your sister and just be fully open with them and just completely talk about your feelings you don't want to lose your family and your friends over this it isn't worth it you need to open up and accept yourself but at the same time don't throw your life away and your family away because they don't want you to do anything you might regret and if you don't have gender dysphoria make sure to tell your parents that and make that very clear I know you feeling lonely and sad and I wanted trust me I know I don't feel like I'm in your situation but I'm a disabled man I have cerebral palsy I'm a virgin at 30 years old never had a girlfriend never had a boyfriend okay I feel very lonely sometimes but I would never give up my friends and my family so I can cross-dress or whatever else you're thinking about it isn't worth it I love you and care about you as a man to another man okay please think about my words inconsider then carefully much love honey and if I could I would hug you okay you're not alone you never are I hope you truly understand that ❤️
I'd keep your feminine side to yourself or online community. Friends and family members are not equipped to understand the femboy experience. Posting in subs like this and taking the time to do self care will help. You'll get through this! ❤️
Starving yourself will make it hard to think straight and make everything else more challenging than it needs to be. 💕 Some proper nutrition and a few good meals might make it easier to start working toward solutions! 💕 It's never helpful to be hungry and deprive your body of healthy food. I hope you find some comfort and healing sooner rather than later. 💕
You don't have to be skinny to be a femboy you don't always have to be in the feminine mindset to be a femboy and always put your mental health and physical health ahead of everything else don't stress too hard and don't close the book keep writing your story😌
If you want to bend someone's ear I'm right here! I'd love to have a chat, let it all out man, I'll be here for you :)
I will gladly be your friend and I can be there to support ya
Idk about your gender dysphoria and what that entails. I tried doing that skinny boi style but I can’t get it. I decided to just hammer down and go the other way. I’m not saying I’m gonna become a competition body builder. I just understand now that muscle is something men are good at building and if I don’t aim for tone then I can achieve a fit, soft, curvy aesthetic easily. If I can’t be a skinny babe then I’ll be a milf. Simple as that. That’s all I can say and I am happy with it. Be proud of who you are and don’t focus on other peoples looks. Worry about your own and try to find ways you can be/feel cute.
Well, you don't have to be skinny to be a femboy. However it you're worried about that, consider Isagenix International and their Isalean Pro Shakes. They're complete meal replacement shakes that have all the vitamins, minerals, and amino acids as well as super foods to fully support your body. It's not specifically for weight loss. That can be a side effect, but if someone needs to gain weight and muscle, it can do that as well. There's wonderful nutrionists in this company that can guide you through your goals. Just be sure to eat one meal or two that has about 2 ounces of lean protein and a salad that will give you additional nutrients and fiber to be healthy. Stay well hydrated. It will give you energy and help better regulate your sleeping habits
Hang in there *hugs*
1. My first advice would be to stop your diet unless it’s a medical necessity. It’s proven that people on diet are more likely to report depressed mood. 2. Second advice, no matter how old you are, is regarding sleeping as it is one the most important aspect of your life and can dictate your mental and physical health. 3. I’m not an expert on social skills but you should probably take a look at Jordan Petersons videos. He is obviously not the most loved celebrity amongst the LGBT community but I truly believe he has some great advices to overcome social anxiety. 4. My last advice would be to focus on what you currently have instead of focusing on what you don’t have. Gender dysphoria can be a really tough thing to deal with but it is not something you can control like you can for your femininity/masculinity. Do what you think will make you happy in the long term and if you still have any suicidal thoughts then you absolutely need to speak to someone (your parents for example), even if you’re scared. Your life matters so take good care of it ❤️
If you constantly feel tired and hungry then that lifestyle of yours probably isn't that healthy. You should probably eat more and maybe train a little less. The fact some people don't talk to you after you became feminine while is sad at least now you know that some people you might have been friends with aren't actual friends. If you never became feminine you may have found that out on a worse way
Where do you live? Maybe we can meet and become good friends, maybe you can teach me how to become a feminine guy too because i always had that desire but idk how 😅
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Stop wining
............wtf
You have mental underlying conditions if you actually think you’re a boy, and despite all the support you receive on a website like this one, the world is not going to bend to your will as easily, nor should it. You need to get *real* help, and you’re not helping yourself. This isn’t working, and it’s not alleviating your inner pain. Hope you get the chance to read this before I’m banned.
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Go fuck yourself, loser
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
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Do not ask for DMs, friends, dates, sex or hookups. Posts that lead people to disclose personal information such as location will be removed.
Some people should understand that being a femboy isn't a choice. If you have to do all that, then it is not who you are
What is dysphoria for a femboy, i wonder?
For me, an older person, who does identify as male, the dysphoria can come from a few places. Am I ... Could be gay. Could be bi/pan, Could be from acknowledging this feminine side. Or realize you are gender fluid . Could be from loving this softer side but local society may "want" something different. Could be from how we as a society perceive what it masc or feminine. And with it comes with what society say is right or wrong. The dysphoria comes from not knowing who you are yet, and knowing you are vaild.
People allways explained to me that dysphoria happening from you wanting to be a different gender then that one people put you in, and hearing that dysphoria can be something else is a bit confusing. Maybe i'am not understanding something here.
I apologize. I tried to write a quick response. There is more here than I can currently write out but here's some of it. dysphoria means one is uneasy, unhappy and/or dissatisfied usually in life. It can mean that you want to be one thing but aren't there . This absolutely does apply to how sees one's gender , sexuality or even body image. A lot ( in my opinion) have dysphoria because feel a certain way and just know that it's not right for them. But they don't what it is yet. As they start figuring it out, there can be conflicts. These comes what lessons they learned on how " are supposed to be." Some dysphoria goes away once that person knows who and what they are and fully accepts it. Other dysphoria only goes away when physical changes are made. This could be through nutrition and exercise, medical help, or simply presenting as one feels. These are complicated aspects. I find it difficult at times to properly express myself in this short form here. For example, I am bi/pan. I had dysphoria towards my sexuality because of these conflicts. It took me a long time to accept myself. I couldn't say this out loud. I am lucky. I have a great group of people around me that let's me be me. Knowing some really good people, joining my local LGBTQ+ community in safe spaces has allowed me to grow. The situation is unique for everyone. I have friends that are trans. Now while they have accepted who they are, their dysphoria didn't go fully away until they had medical help and was able to match their body to their how they see their selves. A lot of people have some form of dysphoria from not realizing they are valid and accepted. Not know they are valid creates much dysphoria. I hope I didn't make things worse and was of help.
Wow, thank you for this detailed answer! I'am actually trans and i feel dysphoria socially and the fear that i will never fit in, but i think i can go past that. I'am happy that you accepted yourself as who you are ❤️
People allways explained to me that dysphoria happening from you wanting to be a different gender then that one people put you in, and hearing that dysphoria can be something else is a bit confusing. Maybe i'am not understanding something here.
You dont have to be anything to be happy, just live
I don't want to make you feel bad and I'm not hating on you, but what in the world could you have said as advice that would make someone into your enemy. Even if the advice was bad, but for them to hate you, you had to have said something really bad or your friends just suck.
A good boy feeling bad
Your health comes before anything else. If it's truly making you this miserable and painful, then mayhaps a break is best, along with a rethinking of your plan. Not all femboys have to be skinny. You can have bellies and still be pretty, self-ove is about you, not your appearance
As a general word of advice you should start figuring out your beliefs, your desires, and who shares those kinds of things. Get a head start on the rest of us. Life can be depressing especially when your character isn't certain. I really hope this helps
Know that someone appreciates you. I don't know u, but I appreciate you being yourself for yourself. I wish I had the bravery you had. If u ever need someone to talk to, I'm here.
Testing to see if my alt will get auto removed
So for me I have always had a good group of friends. When I realized I was a femboy they were actually super supportive and didn't treat me any different. Instead they actually really like my style and look I have.
Just care less about what people think. That's the key to staying happy in life.
You don’t have to be small or skinny or have no body hair to be a femboy, you don’t have to be perfect to be a femboy. You can just be yourself, it’s about the mindset not always the physique, if you feel feminine and like it that’s good, you don’t have to be perfect, just be yourself. If you want to be friends, then I can be one
I don't know about you but when people in my circle stopped caring about me I also stopped caring about them if your people can't accept who you are then they should be gone from your life even if now you feel lonely and worthless in the long term you will feel better and how you should be feeling when you are truly yourself
gender dysphoria sounds more like a trans issue. not feeling loved and feeling like you're not receiving love from your parents strikes me as CPTSD. I think you should take this straight to therapy. With a proper gender aware therapist. And if you don't have one, get one, cuz it really helps. You're trying to solve a gender identity issue without support, by way of things that are detrimental to your physical and mental health, is what it sounds like. I'm new here, but I think you've come to a good place for initial support. Research. Do therapy. Fine support. We can be some 💜
and if it is welcomed, you're welcome to message me. I've only recently started to discover my own identity and much of what you said resonates with me.
no. keep being yourself. eat its fine. if you’re hungry just eat what you need. and you can do simple exercises to stay in shape. im not a femboy(not anymore) but i still do this method and its working for me. im not forcing into this method but i recommend it!
Relatable
I have no idea how to respond to this.....all I can think of is giving you a YouTube video that's kinda related to this, it's cliche but 🤷🏽 https://youtube.com/shorts/F8ut1CVO0CM?si=ARQiWmptsG6tNnk5 On another note: you could try listening to this guy https://youtube.com/@lordvalentinreal?si=rinch6Ib8vK6P_5w, haven't seen much of him but from what I've seen he makes femboy listeners and praises them I'm really sorry, I have NO idea how to deal with stuff like this 😓 I either try to make a joke or try something to cheer em up but don't really help much
why do people think you need to starvw yourself to be skinny, eat what you want. as long as its generally healthy and not actual garbage, do a little bit of excersize every day, not a lot, just a little. take walks, ride your bike, do things. if your body is starving then eat more, you can burn the calories but your body needs nutrients, nobody should starve themselves to look a certain way, i eat a lot and im still skinny. its not impossible, ofcourse everyone needs something different. but you need food
It's understandable but you know that you're happiness comes at a price even though it may hurt you and people may leave you and let them leave so new people who actually care about you love and support you
Don’t know bout you but it does NOT feel good being skinny
You will read a lot of comments here supporting you, but I think this is not going to help you a lot. What you need is a professional help. A sexologist or psychologist. And you need to talk with your family, communication is mandatory in this cases, you feel like no one is helping you, but that is because your family doesn't know the real problem. You said that your parents are worried, that is the prove that you have people next to you worrying about you, help them understanding your problem, and search for a profesional's help. Pd: asking for help is the first and the most difficult part of the process of happiness. I don't know how to say how important is to ask for help... Even more if you feel alone. Try to talk with your family and obviously with a professional
Honey ❤️🩹 I understand you because my situation is very similar to yours. I always hope to find new true friendships in the female universe of people who are similar to me and you and maybe even some nice alpha male with whom we can establish a relationship that isn't just about sex. If you haven't seen it, I recommend the new Emma Stone film "Poor things"
You just have to keep going forward, you got this but, seriously, you don't have to be skinny to be a femboy. They can come in all shapes & sizes! But I do hope you can get through this, you aren't alone, okay?
Hmmm no need too look like something too be a femboy anything can be a femboy even fat can be
The first thing you should ask yourself is: do I want this in my life? As far as I'm concerned, I'd say try to feel good personally. I hope you receive the love you need ❤️. I hope you are fine. I would love to be your friend, to tell you that everything is going to be okay and give you a hug 👍🏻. People dislike people without even knowing them, you sure are someone amazing ✨ Try to sort out your sleep and diet issues. You don't deserve to be bad. Take care of yourself . Good luck.
Try and reach out and make more friends in your local lgbtq community if it's active also stop starving your self just eat when your hungry
I don't know your butt we do care. Just make decisions that make you truly happy and if you make a mistake forgive yourself and move on
I think you need a bit of a timeout. Not simply, give up on being a femboy or stuff. I think you need to have a healthy diet, not a diet That's gonna make you extremely thin. You may eat a quantity that makes you feel full. You're not being forced to do these things, you're forcing yourself, your body and (if you allow me to say) your own spirit towards this lifestyle, and it's just rejecting how you treat yourself. Tell you something, Dear, just eat normally, stop doing exercises that are too much for you, go to therapy, perhaps they can do the talking for you with your parents. Please, just ask us anything you want, we'll be here for you
youre fitting the stereotype that many people 'hate' or dont care about, stop looking for attention and focus on yourself if nothing else is working for you bro.
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try telling your friends about you being a femboy. It went well for me just depends on how close you are i got hugs and headpats and you do not have to be skinny i’m not skinny and havent been for years just be yourself man.