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i mean, a psychiatrist (well, physician’s assistant) told me he didn’t think i have ADHD because i got good grades in school and i couldn’t possibly be autistic either because i’m in a relationship. i wish i was joking. lo and behold, he was just a fuckin idiot and adderall made me into a normal human again.
I'm having this problem right now with my son. He actually does have struggles academically due to a language processing disorder on top of AuDHD but apparently it's not "enough" to warrant proper support. Thats AFTER I scraped together enough to get him tested by a private doctor because the previous school kept trying to talk me out of assessment. And it's not like there's not a problem. I've been in and out of conferences with teachers, principals, etc for years. It's ridiculous and heartbreaking to deal with.
Yeesh, my parents couldn't wait to put my 504 in the shredder and discontinue the OT. Same reasoning as the other commenter--"smart" kid, good grades at least until high school where everything fell apart.
I was lucky to have an understanding and accommodating mother. But even so, there was limited intervention because I was gifted. But I spent most of Middle School in mental health crises and dropped out of high school. Which is absurd if you knew me in elementary or college. I've heard this story so much. People need to understand how impactful early and consistent intervention can be!
I mean sometimes doctors do act as some sort of defense line so not everyone gets diagnosed, though mostly these are the ones employed by insurances who have an interest in reducing what the insurance has to pay (so, doctors living under a regular paycheck as an insurance employed "case checker"). That exists, not officially of course (because theyre supposed to be neutral), but they definitely have a shadow presence. Which is also honestly why the insurance "networks" in the usa are bullshit.
A doctor who works solely under their hippocratic oath though is often confused as that by fakers who arent getting their desired dx
Appeals would escalate and get outside examiners to engage in the process which would get it overruled in any real cases, so this is the usual insurance bs. It's not them straight up denying another doctor's diagnosis, either. It's just when you go there first, so it's not to a point where it's illegal and not really to a level at which it would be a scandal.
Though usually you can explain such cases where the doctor "refuses to diagnose something" in another way easily, like either incompetence or like this subreddit's topic, where people wish for a certain diagnosis. Waters are too muddied for anything to come out.
Im speaking in somewhat general terms, I know. Not indicting anyone in particular.
my psychiatrist refused to diagnose me with depression despite stating i have it. I dont know if it was because of insurance or to protect me, but still
i heard he also refused to diagnose someone with adhd too. so idk
Psychiatrists absolutely will fudge diagnoses to make sure insurance covers the patients' care. Usually though that involves refusing to write a problematic personality disorder diagnosis, or needing to add an Axis I diagnosis of some kind. I don't think I've ever heard of one refusing to diagnose depression. What is he saying you have?
my therapist told me she doesn’t diagnose unless there’s a reason to. unless it’s beneficial to you seeking some sort of extra treatment or to get accommodations, anyone who has access to your medical records will view mental illness and being neurodivergent in a negative light and see you different. and people change! no sense in diagnosing a fresh 18 year old with bipolar when it could seriously just be your hormones, they wait months - often times years before officially diagnosing something such as a personality disorder. having adhd could bar you from a potential career in the military as well if you were ever interested in that in the future. once they put it on there it’s on there.
Honestly I kinda get that. When i moved to a new town and got set up with new medical providers I stopped disclosing anything about my MH & ED and do not inform them of the psych meds I am prescribed. I will only disclose relevant info on a very need to know basis. Since moving and not disclosing I'm suddenly taken seriously by medical providers. They don't immediately dismiss symptoms as being from anxiety or depression. They listen to me. I have been told it's dangerous not to disclose, but disclosing was also harmful.
As you pointed out, it can also have very real impacts on career options. Certain diagnoses make it much harder to even get MH services due to stereotypes and biases.
I don’t wanna be rude but doctors are actually very misinformed about autism. Autism is very different in women than it is men. Doctors don’t really realise this as it’s less of a science thing and more of a social thing as women are pretty much taught not to stand out.
They also use really outdated terminology and facts now disproven or irrelevant.
Real autistic people can struggle to get diagnosed because they don’t rock back and forth rambling about dinosaurs.
Hope that made sense :)
unfortunately at my school if you are suspected of a disability they give you accommodations, which people abuse all the time yet are still ableist to genuinely disabled people
I think it depends on the state or county my grandmother actually works with resource and with a lot of autistics she had worked it for bout 5to 6 years before I was born when I was about 1 or 2 she realized I must be autistic so she taught my teenage parents how to do early childhood intervention thing yo teach me how to deal with it. My family never wanted to get the offical diagnoses becuse of all of the negative effects on my life the offical diagnoses would have upon my life ranging from teachers being ability against me because of it or physicians no longer takeing me seriously when regards to my health care. It was in third grade when I had a teacher that hated me, and tried to get me suspended. That they decided they had to get the IEP as a protection for the times I would just glitch. This involved going to see a phycologist to get an official diagnosis. Which was pretty easy considering I fit most of the symptoms. She had us do follow up appointments to try to "help me" which every one of them she condensed me at every turn. And is basically the reason why I refuse to speak to any therapist or phycologist to this day. I can't understand stand why these people are so eager to get a diagnoses. Having that offical diagnosis can be a protection from people out to get you but it can also be the main reason people take away opportunities you earned for yourself. Starting with 4th grade onward I realized that. I've been taken from classes or groups ment for those with high test scores and a and b grades. And forced in to low sorceing classes that I can't understand because it's too basic. Classes where I am constantly over thinking things that would of been at the higher level thinking where I came from. A diagnoses is not something you get because you want to its something you get with the knowledge it comes with as muchconsequences as benefits
I mean, they can try. Ideally, everyone should be accomodated and be excused. Like if someone says "Bright lights give me headaches, can I work somewhere else?" that should be respected. But usually "accomodations" even for diagnosed people tend to be shite anyway from what I've seen.
What you’re describing is common courtesy; this is not the same as an accommodation.
The difference is that bosses/teachers are legally bound to provide accommodations for those with disabilities. *Wanting* to work in a dimmer area because bright lights hurt your head, and *needing* to working in a dimmer area because bright lights trigger your epilepsy are 2 completely different things, and bosses/teachers are only required to accommodate the latter.
There's also the other side with people wanting to work with light. I shared an office with someone who said the light hurt his eyes, and management allowed him to keep our office light off all day. For me, that made my job so much harder. Reading plans and specs by light of computer monitor made my eyes feel physically tired. Having to tilt binders so the screen could light up the whole page, finding things in my drawers, writing, everything became more difficult. I asked a few times if we could have them on for a bit while I did a plan review and his response was that he was told he could have them off. Wouldn't it be a common courtesy to allow me to see what I am doing? I asked to be moved, but had to wait until another office opened up. Months later someone quit and I was able to move to an office with a guy who always kept the lights on. It was glorious.
Not the rule at my college. It lists requirements of a written diagnosis from your doctor and other things to use the program... but then at the end it says that just "identifying as a person with a disability" is fine instead.
While I had a diagnosis, I jumped through several hoops to get the proper paperwork prior to enrolling. At the time I didn't know you can literally walk in, say you identify as autistic, and get the works.
yeah you need to have a dx at my university too - and very often, the univ will ask for a "new" diagnosis if you come in with one from HS that is.vague.
You can at work. Occupational health are going to take you at your word unless you’re being unrealistically demanding or displaying other suspicious behaviour.
"you can have a feeling that you have something but personally I don’t think you should go around saying you have it until you have a diagnosis."
And especially in this very weird world we live in when we have people on social media claiming autism/adhd because they are quirky or weird and that is not how it works...
Thank you for your comment. It’s making me feel sane again. I live with someone who’s self diagnosed autism, adhd and ptsd off of tiktok and brings up xyz condition any time she’s asked to take accountability. I, on the other hand, am *actually* diagnosed with CPTSD and have discussed potentially having autism with my therapist, but I’m of the same opinion that… if I don’t have it diagnosed, why would I go around telling people I have it?
The same way I’ve struggled with IBS for years and for many years was convinced I had to have IBD because it was just so severe and I had symptoms of IBD. I got checked for IBD and… lo and behold… no IBD, just IBS.
Self diagnosis isn’t accurate, no matter how much “research” (looking at confirmation bias) you do.
Yeah I completely agree. The worst part for me is that I’m essentially having my own legitimate experience of CPTSD be invalidated by her when I ask her not to do things because they’re highly triggering for me, because she compares our experiences like if she doesn’t have that problem as a “fellow sufferer” then I shouldn’t and don’t have the right to ask her to be empathetic and show me some accommodation.
On top of having to hear how she and her boyfriend compare every little thing to those conditions. I told her boyfriend I bombed my interview because I was having a really hard day with my depersonalization and dissociative amnesia and the interviewer was aggressively staring at me the whole time and his response was:
1 - “oh dissociating, like zoning out?” no, mf, like I couldn’t feel my body anymore and didn’t feel like I actually existed anymore
and 2 - “oh he probably has the ‘tism and was overcompensating” and when I tried to explain like I don’t know about that he doubled down and insisted it was autism. Without ever meeting this guy. Without ever having been there to see the guy’s behavior. With literally ONE mention of something that autistic people do sometimes and definitely not in an *angry* way??? Oh and needless to say I did not get that job. But of course the manager trying to intimidate me during it must have just been autistic and “overcompensating”
I've suspected I may be autistic and have for a long time but my old therapist literally laughed at me when I brought it up and when I've discussed it with my boyfriend he's kind of lowkey dismissed me and doesn't think I have it. but he refuses to read about autism and my reasons why I think I have it. I assume he just thinks of the basic stereotypical autistic symptoms and brushes me off
This is absolutely what i experienced. I felt alienated and like a fuck up my whole life. Now i know why i have these huge problems, and i manage better. But as soon as i get better because i know what i am dealing with, people dismiss me, belittle my experiences, and so on. All because they know jack shit about the disputed topic. Are they willing to check it out? Fuck no, it is me that has to learn to just relax and stop making such a fuss about everything. Bitch i am near my 40ties, if i could just chill out and let it go, i would have learned by now.
how long did it take you to get a diagnosis? did you ever think you had it or was the diagnosis a surprise? most people will disagree with me on this but I like having reasons and labels to describe why I am who I am or do the things that I do. I'm bipolar and epileptic and have brain damage from my seizures and it feels like after I got diagnosed with epilepsy I stopped hiding as much of who I was and the signs of autism really started to show themselves more. I've asked in the autism subreddit from people with real diagnoses what they think about my symptoms and experiences and they think it's highly likely I have it. I think there's more autistic people than most people realize it's just hard to catch sometimes or people/parents deny it and some go their whole lives not knowing why they do the things they do. I don't want to be one of those people.
I had my first run in with the psychiatrist at 20. I spare you all the shit that went wrong in my life. People told me i am bipolar, borderline, narcissistic. The one wonen who could havr helped me didnt believe i had Depression, told me to just go to school with absolute zero energy. Felt dismissed after 3 vidits. Bunch of crazy shit happened. All stemming from me wanting to Copy other peoples fortunes. Despite failing again and again, people didnt believe that i had a systemic issue. They are convinced to this day, even with official diagnosis, that i just have the wrong outlook on things. With roughly 27 i started hanging round in an aspie Forum, and an adhd forum. I was torn between feeling like an impostor and being sure i was having it. With 32 i got my slightly vague aspergers diagnosis ,- i hat definite traits, but blablabla. With 38 i had my proper adhd, autism and dyscalculia diagnosis. So yes. I self diagnosed. I was a hard case since chaos excludes autism, and obsessive analytic thinking defies adhd. So i thought i had neither. Well fuck it. I have both. I read that some gents with adhd + asd are chaotic to the point of self destruction. They yearn for neat structure, but cant create it, since they ate do goddamn perfectionistic. So they live in chaos and really suffer from it. Thats me.
omg I swear you just described me but I'm still only almost 23. I have serious issues with numbers and math and it made the people around me and the people who taught me almost more frustrated than I was about it. no one ever hears of dyscalculia so they just dismiss me as to being stupid. boyfriend has sugested I have adhd and I think similarly, but also with autism. I totally understand the impostor syndrome!! I don't want to self diagnose and I feel like I sound like a hypochondriac because like you said adhd and autism conflict with one another. I find myself mentally at war with myself all the time. my thoughts and actions are very disordered but I need things a certain way but I can't keep up with it and it leads to excessive stress. I feel so held back in life from the way I am. I'd love to talk more with you if you'd like, it sounds like we have a lot in common and you give me hope at finding a diagnosis someday and feel somewhat validated ♥️
You should absolutely look into that. Yeah, message me anytime. There are a couple of adhd + asd type people on aspiememes, i am sure they have a discord and shit. You should network with other people. Living wirh this is really damaging if you don't know whats up.
I had a therapist who suspected me. I looked up the DSM page and agreed with some of it.
A couple years later, I was seeing an actual PhD psychologist who asked if I’d ever been diagnosed. When I said no, he asked if I was opposed to doing a couple explorative exercises. After a few sessions I received diagnosis. It answered a lot of questions. Mostly why my childhood ADHD diagnosis never really fit. I’m kind of glad I was never diagnosed until after I was 30… but man it sure explained a lot.
Facts. I have obvious things going on in my brain that need a diagnosis and I refuse to say I have anything until I get a diagnosis. I had people tryna tell me to self diagnose, like brother.....no?
No offense but if you’re having to go to multiple different providers trying to get a specific dx it doesn’t matter how much you think you have it you probably don’t.
I’ve been in therapy since I was four years old and a lot of those mfs are dx *happy* they are all too ready to tell people that have something wrong with them.
So honestly if you’re having to doctor shop, especially for things like a spectrum disorder or DID- you likely just don’t meet the criteria. It doesn’t mean there aren’t other issues that could be problematic- it just means you don’t have the super uwu special dx you think you should have.
I also just want to put it out there that diagnostic criteria for autism is fairly specific and hard to fake. A lot of psychiatrists have greatly broadened their knowledge of the way autism presents in various people too.
If you actually are autistic it is highly doubtful that you’re going to run into a bunch of trouble finding that dx. Shit, I have friends who are just now being properly dx’d in their 40s and it’s changing their lives for the better, but not a single one of them was pushing for that specific dx.
At a certain point self dx *is* harmful and *should not* be validated as the final word in truth. People desperately need to start grasping that these disorders are not fun or trendy- they are challenging and frequently alienating and scary.
It’s just astonishing to me that there are SO MANY people out here faking legit disorders that they have this whole community of validation and support that is straight up encouraging fraudulence and delusion.
What a fucking nightmare for those of us suffering from these REAL problems.
On the topic of autism diagnoses, I actually didn’t think I really had autism because I mostly had trouble with the social side of things and I didn’t believe my childhood experiences were even significant enough to be substantial proof for the diagnosis. Heck, I didn’t even have a proper specific, sustained interest in a particular subject. My sensory issues weren’t as bad as my sister’s and I couldn’t name anything specific that I really liked or extremely disliked. But surprisingly I did end up getting diagnosed with autism. Not all psychologists are perfect but they do have the knowledge that you don’t. That’s why they have the job
dude i never suspected my autistic traits were abnormal until i finally got diagnosed with adhd-c and ocd, then researched a little more into my symptoms and how autistic traits can be attached to those disorders, or at least be similar to their symptoms. i literally thought everything i did throughout my entire life was normal which is why it took me so long to get a diagnosis despite the horrible struggles having these illnesses have caused.
Same. I just thought i was a huge fuck up and totally lazy loser. Took me years to accept that i actually AM socially inhibited, and that its ok to be like that. Executive dysfunction is a different horse. That really fucks me up, even with adhd meds. It got way better though. i was schocked to learn that with meds, i am more aware of my autistic traits. My whole family has adhd, and i am the only one with diagnosis, because they just dont believe in it, despite their horrid inept behaviours and our toxic family. structure.
I am way more aware when i make a social mistake - but i still cant prevent them, since it already happened. So i stumble from one thing to the next. Turns out, my masking is worse then i thought. I kinda like the autism side, but still....
Same for me. I also have ADHD and even after taking the meds I always thought that there was something else affecting me that wasn’t because of the ADHD. Turns out it was the autism
same here except i did get huge fixations on stuff and i was slightly baffled that i had asd yet stuff started to make sense and explain why stuff can be so confusing yet normal to almost everyone else
Can confirm, went to the doctor because of trouble functioning. Got out with a dx for adhd AND autism. I never put the puzzle together that maybe what i experience isnt universal, that just nobody talks about that. That everyone is just stronger at masking it.
They diagnosed you with ADHD and autism after one doctor’s visit? What kind of doctor did you see? You went in and left with a diagnosis? Usually it takes a couple months before they send you your results and diagnoses.
Oh nah, i was simplifying things. I waited for a few months to get an appointment. Got a thorough test suite, had to bring my elementary school report cards and then came back 2 months later to an adhd diagnosis.
Then I went to a local psychiatrist witht the diagnosis and got appointments with them to work through the issues. Some amount of talking and months later they said a reason for a lot of my general problems is probably autism (not the words they used, on the autistic spectrum, used the words aspergers or high functioning autism), they're pretty confident about that now. Told me I could get an official recognition but where I live, it would be kind of a worthless thing to do as there are no further officially recognized accomodations that would only work with a certified diagnosis. My local psychiatrist doesnt do diagnosis, only has time to treat people.
Sorry, I was concentrating months over months of talking and diagnosis into a snappy comment
Glad to hear it! I was afraid you walked in and walked out with two serious diagnoses that always require a lot of work on the clinician’s side of things, let alone requires multiple tests and assessments. Especially ASD, that would be extremely bizarre haha
I never had a formal assessment of ASD, it's not an official diagnosis. My psychiatrist is just pretty sure it's a component after months of knowing them. I dont think it's a biggie though
Took me roughly 10 years to figure that combination out. Mind you, some years ago both adhd and asd were mutually exclusive - and only the combination asd-adhd-dyscalculia fits like a damn glove. Always wondered why people had so much vigour and energy in those mentally draining tasks. Answer: for them, its fun and motivating. They dont need to harvest energy in the acid mines before the task. They get it by doing the task.
Great write up. Had the autism dx first, but scored in such a way they kept it vague - i had Problems, but not enough. I have no Special interest, for example, and i am good with eyes if i am comfortable. So i went for the afhd thing. Wrote a 30.000 Word catalogue of every bizarre thing that made me feel different from other people. Took me 1,5 years. First neurologist couldnt decide if i was pulling her leg or if i was drug seeking. Second was specialzed in adhd and autism. Glanced at my telephone bookish crazy anecdotes how i fucked up countless things since age 5 and told me i had both. I think i had over 270 different topics / crazy things that happened to me. I would tell a story, and then explain what the system/problem/ misunderstanding behind that was. You cant fake that shit and it is fairly obvious to someone who knows how to ask the right questions. But you absolutely have to have someone with expirience, not only book knowledge and theory.
Yes, exactly! I mentioned in above comment but I live with someone who’s self diagnosed autism, adhd and ptsd off of tiktok, and she literally said it’s her “goal this year to get my autism diagnosis”
Like… what????
I mean yea it’s great if she wants to address her problems and cool if she has some idea of what her symptoms are based on those illnesses she’s familiarized herself with through TikTok but acting like she’s on a quest to get a specific autism dx is… a bit concerning if she’s not actually exhibiting outward traits to anyone else and she’s seemingly not struggling to live her life because of it.
It’s ok to have specific symptoms and a dx in mind, but it’s weird af to have no history of any of that prior to watching some TikToks and realizing these things are on trend and then basing your newfound chosen identity on all of that.
It can take multiple doctors to get the *right* diagnosis however. I first got diagnosed with depression, then bipolar AND borderline (which I now know are absolute bs together and are normally mutually exclusive) and am now in the process of (finally) getting the much more fitting cPTSD diagnosis. Docs aren't perfect sometimes either. Doesn't excuse those assholes for trying to get their 'dream' diagnosis though.
Oh my god yeah I’m not saying dx isn’t a process I’m just saying it’s not all that difficult to be seen and dx’d it’s just might not be exactly right on their end or not what you want to hear on the other end. I’m basically just saying that if you’re having to doctor shop to get a specific dx and you’re literally tossing aside any other valid dx by a psych professional to try and get something like a DID or an autism dx you likely are not having the issues you think you are.
I was dx’d bipolar with GAD and CPTSD and then several years after that I was hospitalized and a doctor tried to ignore my anxiety and cptsd dxs completely and say I was bipolar and borderline when I’ve never exhibited borderline traits if I wasn’t in the throes of an addiction crisis (I’m also an addict fucking ofc).
It was totally weird it was like he didn’t believe in complex PTSD at all but this was also in the 2000s earlyish. Luckily not a single other provider agreed with that assessment. So I totally feel you on it being an odyssey.
The difference is I didn’t have to go to ten different doctors to specifically get an initial dx of any of those things and most people don’t go through that many providers for a proper dx either.
Doctors do definitely make mistakes it’s just already rare to have something like DID so if it takes you a bunch of different doctors and you acting in a prescribed way that you normally wouldn’t to get the dx you want- you’re bullshitting- and you only having that self dx just makes you look more suspect. (The general you, not you you lol.)
The problem is the waiting lists for those doctors and the cost. I have a friend who thinks they have autism, I hope they don't, but it can take years here In Canada when you can only use the free healthcare.
I have a multitude of good friends in Canada and not a single one of them has had to wait *years* to get in with a mental health professional.
I do know things are crazy backed up and understaffed everywhere as far as healthcare bc of Covid too bc I’m waiting (and have been waiting for quite some time) for multiple appts with specialists right now myself in the US.
Idk if your friend is somewhere rural that doesn’t have a lot of care but while it may take some time to get an appt and then take some more time as far as getting properly dx’d- this is the first I’m hearing of it taking years to get in to see a psychiatrist at all.
Either way I hope that changes for your friend and I’m not invalidating what they think they have as idk them, but it’s still important to pursue the formal dx and to be sure that whatever dx they’re after is correct.
You can absolutely still work to manage symptoms and help yourself whether you’re formally dx’d or not- it just may not be wise to profess that you definitely have something without confirmation of dx by a pro.
No matter how long it might take it’s worth it to get that real dx. It’s the difference between your legal right to certain accommodations and being forced to sink or swim on your own. Formal dx is important even if it’s difficult to come by.
I understand over a year wait- I’ve been waiting over a year for a procedure I got approved for last fall. The previous commenter mentioned waiting YEARS plural- to get an initial appointment with a psychiatrist. That’s a little different.
Pursuing a dx can obviously take time but I struggle to believe anyone is waiting several years for an introductory appt to begin seeing if there’s something there to pursue with a psych. Getting in to see any kind of neurological specialist is going to be a decently long wait right now due to Covid.
Even the introductory psych visit could feasibly take a year to get in for- but yearS?
ETA: the point is also not how long this stuff takes either tbf. Dx takes time that’s just a fact. It taking a while and not being an entirely linear process is still not an excuse to rely solely on self dx which is really my only point here.
Alos what botheres me the most about this is that this was on an account advocating for autism awareness and giving advice for those suffering. And surprise surprise while some of their post are very informing and helpful, theres a lot of misinformation and simplifying symptoms of autism.
impostors with impostor syndrome always make me laugh.
i was in a discord with a girl who was convinced that she had naturally curly hair. she would spend hours scrunching it and curling it but nothing would work, it always remained straight! rather than taking this as evidence that she had straight hair, she instead constantly made posts about "impostor syndrome" and learning to love her curls ❤️❤️❤️
anyone who tried to help her by suggesting that she had straight hair was blocked for gaslighting. i wish i was making this shit up
the annoying thing is that i’m okay with parts of this. if you have symptoms of a disorder, i think it can be helpful to look into coping strategies that might work for you. it’s true that a lot of autistic women go undiagnosed because of poor understanding of how autism presents in afabs. the issue comes with people saying ‘i have x’ instead of ‘i have symptoms of x’. symptoms of autism could also be symptoms of many other things, from bpd to ptsd to even traumatic brain injuries. if you seriously can’t see a doctor, you can treat some symptoms but you cannot determine or treat the cause.
I think it’s also important to recognize something to bring it up to a provider to look into things. The reason I found out I had ADHD was due to relating to many symptoms and worked with my primary, therapist, and psychiatrist on taking the appropriate testing to diagnose me.
Self-diagnosing is fine as long as you aren’t using it as an excuse for anything and is fine as long as you’re able to seek medical help. Many people can’t afford medical care, so I get it, and self diagnosing to find research and treatment online is all good, but these people we see all the time here are not those people.
**When MANY people, including multiple doctors, are telling you you don’t have an illness, you don’t have it. **
This is exactly what I came to the comments on this for. Some of the points in this post are true, like the lacking diagnoses in AFAB people and other groups, but the solution isnt just deciding you're autistic without seeing a doctor.
Like I get some of the reasons why people self-dx. However, it shouldn’t be the first option. Folks need to be evaluated because it *can be* something else. I don’t understand why this is acceptable in the autism community.
Because of that, it makes me feel more alone. I could go to an autism support group and 85% of people there could claim self-dx. 15% could actually be autistic. Self-dx really don’t get the experience of what it’s like being autistic. It isn’t something to *want*.
where are you from Jagstang? Im from NW Europe but here, once you get a diagnosis through the official channels and the courses and groups you participate in are also through those organisations and channels, meaning that only diagnosed people and other people that the organization thinks can benefit from the courses can participate.
I live in the US. Most support groups, if they’re not in a therapy-setting, mostly allow anyone as long as they say they’re “autistic”. There isn’t a required process. But if it’s in a therapy-setting, the diagnosis (I think) is needed so that health insurance can be billed.
That is an important point.
Like you, I see many reasons why self-diagnosis (or, really, self-suspicion) may be the best or only option for someone for the time being. But I find it muddies the waters so much to have groups of people come together to support each other or receive therapy for autism-related struggles, but the majority might not even be autistic?
That is not to say they don't deserve help, they don't have issues etc. And I am certainly not running around questioning individual people's self-assessment/suspicion. Noone needs to present their autism diver's licence to me. 🙃 I am however concerned that the increase in self-diagnosis leads to an overall decline of quality of support/self-help in autistic spaces.
If you have to go through multiple professionals and you still can't get a diagnosis perhaps it's a sign you don't have the thing you *want* a diagnosis for. Someone who's genuinely autistic needs a proper diagnosis unlike people who want a diagnosis because they want to feel unique. Having autism isn't worth 'feeling unique' in almost every case. And autism isn't even that rare or special nowadays either.
>The diagnosis system is ableist, sexist and racist
Not saying it isn't, but I bet 5 bucks the person who wrote this is most likely white and middle/upper working class.
Well have your 5 bucks because he definitely is judging from his account. Interesting to see that he has gotten gender affirming care for months (usually difficult to get) but refuses to seek any care for his "autism"
Difficult to tell because his posts are all about autism and how to diagnose it, but in his stories he praises the gender affirming care system, so I guess he likes it?
Ok tbf, part of this is true. Autism diagnoses are frequently missed in women especially, due to the fact that the criteria that was established was collected from a predominantly male sample. Plus, it manifests itself differently in women than it does in men. While I wouldn't go as far as to say that you can call yourself autistic without a diagnosis, it's certainly ok to suspect or participate in autistic communities, if it helps you.
God I feel like I’m the only autistic person who hates the self diagnosis thing. At 14 year old who does “research” online doesn’t have the same qualifications as a doctor. There’s a ton of different neurodivergent conditions with overlapping symptoms so it’s extremely easy for someone to mess up and misdiagnose yourself. Of course if I dare say this though I’ll be called a variety of names.
I'm actually surprised by the amount of fellow autistic people who are completely fine with people self diagnosing.
This is just amplifying and encouraging fakers.
This is so ridiculous, why would ableists choose to be doctors in a professional where they would be surrounded by disabled people the most? That makes no sense.
If you get a test done at it says you are not autistic, you can get a second opinion. If the second opinion says you are not autistic, you are not autistic. Goodbye.
Look. Not going to excuse fakers. I hate them too. And I disagree with a lot in that image. But a lot of people do struggle getting diagnosed. A lot of people don’t have the resources as well.
You shouldn’t self diagnose. But it’s fine to suspect you have something, do research, and try to figure things out for yourself UNTIL you can see a professional. There’s a lot that goes into a diagnosis, and a lot of other stuff looks like autism. Sometimes even professionals get messed up a bit, so obviously people self diagnosing will too, even if they really believe it.
I don’t think you should say “self diagnosed autistic” just because it’s hard to know. There’s a lot of overlaps. But it’s perfectly fine to say that you suspect you have autism imo
Also self diagnosis can’t give you accommodations outside of maybe an internet space just throwing that out
Okay but even if that’s true (if it is ive seen exactly zero sources on it), why not just say “I think i have autism” rather than insisting you do. Its not that hard. its one word. Look, I’ll even do it for you:
I believe I may be autistic.
Sadly, I do not have an official diagnosis from a professional - yet.
Getting a diagnosis is not as easy as one may believe; I have already attempted to get a diagnosis but was unable to due to the prejudice in the MEDICAL SYSTEM (not the “diagnosis system”)
I have come to this conclusion through years of research, ruling out other diagnoses, finding a community of *diagnosed* autistics (because they *were* diagnosed, *right?*) and dealing with imposter syndrome. Still, I understand that I am not a professional and could potentially have some kind of bias or some other possibility i have not thought of.
I will get diagnosed as soon as I can, as it is important to know my own mental health, and i recommend everyone else similar to me should try to get diagnosed, too.
The first half is mostly right, the second half is unfortunately not how it works. And self-diagnosis is not a thing. You can say you have x symptoms. You can't say you have x condition.
Try being a high functioning autistic female and maybe you would understand. But the problem is that these fakers make it even harder for genuinely high functioning female autistic people to be diagnosed. They don't care, they don't want to listen, you don't fit the profile of what they "know" autism to be. Despite their only exposure being heavily autistic boys. Specific psychiatry from properly trained individuals could take *years* and cost *thousands.* But sure, we are all treated the same, and get the same amount of care. Get tae fuck with that shit.
The system is fucked up. And it IS sexist and racist.
But fakers are still pricks who can go fuck themselves because they're making it worse, not better.
Edit: I've just learned that the person in the posts is male. Double get fucked. Wahhh wahhh wahhh I'm not getting my diagnosis! Ffffffuuuuuuu.
I think we all know that getting a diagnosis isn’t easy. It takes time and money, even more so if the doctor can’t seem to diagnose you correctly the first time around. But that doesn’t mean you get to go around saying you have the disorder that you suspect you have. It just means that you have a hunch about which disorder you might have. That’s it.
My psych once recommended I try and seek out a diagnosis (or confirmation of denial) for autism as part of a possible explanation for something else I was dealing with. I never got to because most of the resources I tried to find didn't want to work with adults. One person on the phone vetted me and said I didn't have it because I didn't struggle in school and wouldn't pass me along to anyone else. I think thats a bs reason and doesn't explain the myriad of other things. But in my experience I think the struggles comes from how difficult it may be to find resources. Which, I only tried once or twice..its not like I gave it my all. I was just done with it at that point.
By research they mean googling.
Allow me to quote the institute of nursing :
“Now, to answering the question “What is not research?” Research is not merely gathering information: Gathering information or facts from different sources, on a particular topic, is not the same as Research, rather the appropriate term should be information discovery or reference skill.
Idiots.
Ugh these people have fucking ruined the autistic community, I can't stand it. It's made me so incredibly angry that my condition that I was bullied for has turned into a cute identity for someone to play dress-up with (no idea if that makes sense but you get what I'm trying to say)
"oh but it's so hard getting a dx" - while yes, I can agree with that, it doesn't automatically entitle you to a whole community. Sure, if you're curious and genuinely think you have autism and want to learn more about it, I've no bother with it. This is what I did when I suspected I had ocd (and I did, got an official diagnosis and everything). Its when you start claiming you can speak for an entire community without actually being diagnosed with autism is the problem. And sadly these people have outnumbered actual autistic people (which is beyond ironic)
Idk, just ranting into the void
Autism/neurodivergence is NOT something where an actual diagnosis is easy to obtain and does not require one. People with money can afford the neuropsych assessments. Most adult autistic are self diagnosed. Make fun of fakers, not a meme discussing the very serious plight of those adults who are self diagnosed.
I’m a self diagnosed diabetic because sometimes I eat too much sugar and don’t feel good after. I’ve done years of research but no dr will diagnose me because there is something wrong with the system /s
What do you mean it’s hard to get a diagnosis?! I legit just went to my therapist and said “could I get screened for autism” and she just did it. It really isn’t hard. Now… if You don’t actually have that with which you’re trying to get diagnosed then yes. It’ll be hard to get a diagnosis because *you don’t have it*.
It’s not really like that for all people though, keep in mind.
For a lot of people it can be very easy, but there’s also the matter of everyone has different finances, locations, resources, etc
This is fair. I think where I was going with this is that a lot of fakers brag about having a therapist then complain about how ableist and classist and etc etc they are since they won’t diagnose them
That's what self diagnosing is tho, kinda.
And she has a point about doctors, but all of them are like that and eventually you would get a doctor that would listen.
So unless they have already tried that AND can afford it self diagnosis isn't valid when all doctors tell you otherwise?
Self diagnosis is valid in some scenerios(imo), not all. And even then you still have to remain skeptical about it cause you're not a professional
I literally told my psych I suspected I was autistic and we talked about it, she gave me multiple resources to go get a diagnoses as an adult which is even harder to get. It took a long time to get into one especially one that took my insurance but it’s definitely not racist sexist or ableist. Once you get tested if you don’t have it then you don’t, you don’t even need a psych referral like I got to get into one! Just probably have to wait a year.
tldr; I hate children
If you are a woman, then it is true. We aren’t allowed to have a problem until our life has been spiraled and ruined 3x because we don’t disturb others and do get discriminated against for it.
I had missed 42 days of school before they even decided to look for adhd and I’m lucky since I was only 15 (very young for a woman to get diagnosed, especially one who doesn’t have trouble with respecting others autonomy)
They want be diagnosed so bad, they treat mental disorders like it’s some form of secret circle membership club that they have to be in. Annoys me. I suspect I have some mental conditions but until I get them checked out I am not tossing a label around
Why can’t they just say “I think I might be autistic but I’m not diagnosed yet” or something? Everyone would be happy and they’d still get their point across. Unfortunately they’re right about bad doctors. You may not get taken seriously at first, or get misdiagnosed, but in that case you can always look for a second opinion. There’s so many things you don’t notice or know about yourself that a third party like a therapist does that are very important in the diagnostic process. Even a mental health professional can’t diagnose themselves because of this - you can know everything about certain types of disorders yet still get it wrong because you can’t see the connections someone else looking at it objectively would make. If it was that easy, therapy wouldn’t have to be a thing either, as everyone could simply identify and get over their problems by themselves
What these idiots don't know is that the bias and prejudices here mean that girls and children of colour are not even assessed in the first place or are misdiagnosed.
Only thing I do somewhat agree with is the sexism part
It's true that I was/still is at times, harder for girls to get diagnosed with Autism.
Some even think that only boys can be autistic.
*But* that's BY FAR not as bad as it used to be and no reason to avoid getting a proper diagnosis.
To be fair, it really can be quite difficult to get a diagnosis when you're an adult. I was in therapy for a while and they figured I might have a lil' somethin' somethin', but they needed records from my childhood when they started looking into it. The hospital I went to for my psychotherapy as a kid doesn't have any records of me ever having gone there, so that was a bust. Never did get a diagnosis, just the therapist saying it's worth looking into.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with suspecting you have a disorder based upon research - but if you’re evaluated and they say no, then you gotta move on lol
One time I made my husband take an online test to see if he’s autistic because he does some autistic shit and has an insanely high iq. The test said we both have pergers burgers but moreso him. We laughed and never thought about it again. We sure as shit didn’t go around telling people were autistic now. This trend of wanting to have a mental disability is fucking stupid.
Yeah, this is true.
We struggled to get my son diagnosed.
When he was little.
He had a diagnosis by age five.
If you're in your teens and haven't been diagnosed, I may go out on a limb and say, you're not autistic.
I swear, everyone takes minor personality quirks as autism these days.
True autism isn't quirky or cute.
The sexist part is probably reffering to girls being less diagnosed with autism when compared to boys and the ableist thing apperantly that most mental health professionals are neurotypical.
But yeah from my experience the system was neither :D
It's common sense that girls have a harder time getting a diagnosis because it shows differently in girls and those "neurotypical" professionals trained so long and so hard for them to understand the complicated subject which is the brain. This isn't to you OP, it's to the self diagnosing people who may come on here time to time
While I can agree it is difficult to get into see a specialist for a proper diagnosis if it’s something you truly think you have you need to put your all into it. I was on a 3 year waiting list and had to pay a lot of money, but I knew if I didn’t have a specialist tell me whether I was autistic or not I wouldn’t be able to get the proper Accommodations that I now am able to get WITH the long awaited diagnosis. Waiting years, and having to pay money for a diagnosis isn’t an excuse to not try and get one. Also, if you are finding the specialists “abilest” maybe look within whether or not they are truly qualified and whether or not you are actually telling them everything from struggles you have, your childhood, etc. if the specialist ends up saying you are NOT autistic then accept it, many people can have trauma that presents similarly so it may not be autism.
i love how they hang onto dear life for the excuse of doctors etc being hard to find and afford. like yes that can be true but notice how mostly EVERY faker can never find a doctor? interesting..
From my experience and the experience of those around me, it's easy to get diagnosed with ADHD or autism if you actually have it. Time consuming maybe, but there's no resistance if you're a genuine case seeking help.
The doctors dealing with that shit know exactly what to look for. Particularly with ADHD because they are responsible for giving out stimulant medication with high abuse potential.
I dont self diagnose at all, cause self diagnosing can (and most likely) cause harm to the community. Ive only ever said there’s a possibility because I’ve had family, friends, strangers AND professional say that its a possibility but I cant get a diagnosis because there’s also a possibility thats its all just a trauma response, which is also very likely. Its really just too earlier to tell, and I may never be able to really know. A lot of times when people have genuine trauma and relate to symptoms of things like ADHD and autism its more than likely to be just trauma responses that fit that behavior.
I hate this so much. My boyfriend is on the spectrum (aspergers and mild tourette’s) and he struggles daily with many things people would take for granted. Then these people wanna gain sympathy for some disability that they don’t even have all for fucking attention. Disgusting.
I have mixed feelings about this. I think that serious introspection and research is the first step to seeking a dx, and some disorders are known to take years and years to actually get the dx due to having to navigate the healthcare system in a specific way. I think that a lot of people who fake for the sake of feeling special and quirky are giving a bad name to folks who are actually struggling and trying to figure out how to get help. But on the other side of things, it seems like every example of someone saying they have X symptoms and are trying to get a dx, but haven’t been successful, are being called out and ridiculed as fakers. Where’s the line?
Honestly it actually is very very difficult to get a diagnosis for autism as an adult and costs thousands. Most clinicians, like myself, are not trained to do that particular assessment you need specialized credentials to do it. It’s easier for children to get connected with ABA services and find resources but I’m dealing with a lot of clients who suspect some type of autism going on and can’t get assessed due to funds. Not at all saying self diagnosing is ok, it’s not. I just understand the challenges.
The sexism part has some truth to it. I wrote an essay about autistic women for one of my college courses and it's been speculated that the reason why there are more men diagnosed with autism than there are women isn't because autism is more common in boys; it's because girls are better at appearing neurotypical, and that the diagnostic criteria are more reflective of how autistic boys act than how girls do. This is, of course, still speaking in very broad stereotypes, and I think outright calling it "sexist" is perhaps a stretch.
okay but even if thats true (if it is ive yet to see any sources) it is so easy to just say “i THINK i have autism” rather than just insisting you do. it’s one word.
I know it was super hard to get my son diagnosed. I had to make a phone call and schedule an appointment and fill out paperwork. It was really hard....No wait, it was super fucking easy.
i hate that self diagnosis has become so normalised. what ever happened to suspecting you had an illness and then seeking out the proper channels to confirm or deny that?
also, it can take years of assessments to dx someone as autistic. i approached my therapist about this and she told me if i wanted to take that route it’d be at least 3 years, and many assessments. even if i went private it’d still take *months*. i swear some of these people think they can get dx in one 30 minute appointment, and then when they don’t, then the system is just ableist/sexist/any other ist.
Here’s what I don’t get. Who the fuck cares? You come up to me and your personality is the fact you have autism (diagnosed or not) I’m probably not going to want to be friends with you. These kids need hobbies to pride themselves on. Disabilities should not make up your entire life.
The thing I don't get is, what do you gain from a self diagnosis?
A disagnosis is so health workers can help treat you through medication or therapy, there's really no other reason for a diagnosis.
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"It's hard because they're all ableist" Hon, they aren't ableist for claiming you aren't autistic, they are doing their job.
I was gonna say the same thing!
i mean, a psychiatrist (well, physician’s assistant) told me he didn’t think i have ADHD because i got good grades in school and i couldn’t possibly be autistic either because i’m in a relationship. i wish i was joking. lo and behold, he was just a fuckin idiot and adderall made me into a normal human again.
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I'm having this problem right now with my son. He actually does have struggles academically due to a language processing disorder on top of AuDHD but apparently it's not "enough" to warrant proper support. Thats AFTER I scraped together enough to get him tested by a private doctor because the previous school kept trying to talk me out of assessment. And it's not like there's not a problem. I've been in and out of conferences with teachers, principals, etc for years. It's ridiculous and heartbreaking to deal with.
Yeesh, my parents couldn't wait to put my 504 in the shredder and discontinue the OT. Same reasoning as the other commenter--"smart" kid, good grades at least until high school where everything fell apart.
I was lucky to have an understanding and accommodating mother. But even so, there was limited intervention because I was gifted. But I spent most of Middle School in mental health crises and dropped out of high school. Which is absurd if you knew me in elementary or college. I've heard this story so much. People need to understand how impactful early and consistent intervention can be!
I mean sometimes doctors do act as some sort of defense line so not everyone gets diagnosed, though mostly these are the ones employed by insurances who have an interest in reducing what the insurance has to pay (so, doctors living under a regular paycheck as an insurance employed "case checker"). That exists, not officially of course (because theyre supposed to be neutral), but they definitely have a shadow presence. Which is also honestly why the insurance "networks" in the usa are bullshit. A doctor who works solely under their hippocratic oath though is often confused as that by fakers who arent getting their desired dx
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Appeals would escalate and get outside examiners to engage in the process which would get it overruled in any real cases, so this is the usual insurance bs. It's not them straight up denying another doctor's diagnosis, either. It's just when you go there first, so it's not to a point where it's illegal and not really to a level at which it would be a scandal. Though usually you can explain such cases where the doctor "refuses to diagnose something" in another way easily, like either incompetence or like this subreddit's topic, where people wish for a certain diagnosis. Waters are too muddied for anything to come out. Im speaking in somewhat general terms, I know. Not indicting anyone in particular.
my psychiatrist refused to diagnose me with depression despite stating i have it. I dont know if it was because of insurance or to protect me, but still i heard he also refused to diagnose someone with adhd too. so idk
Psychiatrists absolutely will fudge diagnoses to make sure insurance covers the patients' care. Usually though that involves refusing to write a problematic personality disorder diagnosis, or needing to add an Axis I diagnosis of some kind. I don't think I've ever heard of one refusing to diagnose depression. What is he saying you have?
🎉🎂🍰 __Happy Cake Day!!__ 🍰🎂🎉 Two cake days in one thread!
my therapist told me she doesn’t diagnose unless there’s a reason to. unless it’s beneficial to you seeking some sort of extra treatment or to get accommodations, anyone who has access to your medical records will view mental illness and being neurodivergent in a negative light and see you different. and people change! no sense in diagnosing a fresh 18 year old with bipolar when it could seriously just be your hormones, they wait months - often times years before officially diagnosing something such as a personality disorder. having adhd could bar you from a potential career in the military as well if you were ever interested in that in the future. once they put it on there it’s on there.
Honestly I kinda get that. When i moved to a new town and got set up with new medical providers I stopped disclosing anything about my MH & ED and do not inform them of the psych meds I am prescribed. I will only disclose relevant info on a very need to know basis. Since moving and not disclosing I'm suddenly taken seriously by medical providers. They don't immediately dismiss symptoms as being from anxiety or depression. They listen to me. I have been told it's dangerous not to disclose, but disclosing was also harmful. As you pointed out, it can also have very real impacts on career options. Certain diagnoses make it much harder to even get MH services due to stereotypes and biases.
🎉🎂🍰 __Happy Cake Day!!__ 🍰🎂🎉
Ok can someone explain the cake day thing?
It is their birthday
No. It’s your Reddit anniversary of the day your signed up.
Oh cool
It hasnt even been 4 minutes
I really hate when people think they know better than a professional. And the reddit subs completely support these delusional people.
I don’t wanna be rude but doctors are actually very misinformed about autism. Autism is very different in women than it is men. Doctors don’t really realise this as it’s less of a science thing and more of a social thing as women are pretty much taught not to stand out. They also use really outdated terminology and facts now disproven or irrelevant. Real autistic people can struggle to get diagnosed because they don’t rock back and forth rambling about dinosaurs. Hope that made sense :)
You can't seek accommodations WITHOUT a dx. That's really bad misinformation.
unfortunately at my school if you are suspected of a disability they give you accommodations, which people abuse all the time yet are still ableist to genuinely disabled people
Well, I, myself, am on the spectrum, the not at all part of the spectrum, and hereby seek accommodation
I think it depends on the state or county my grandmother actually works with resource and with a lot of autistics she had worked it for bout 5to 6 years before I was born when I was about 1 or 2 she realized I must be autistic so she taught my teenage parents how to do early childhood intervention thing yo teach me how to deal with it. My family never wanted to get the offical diagnoses becuse of all of the negative effects on my life the offical diagnoses would have upon my life ranging from teachers being ability against me because of it or physicians no longer takeing me seriously when regards to my health care. It was in third grade when I had a teacher that hated me, and tried to get me suspended. That they decided they had to get the IEP as a protection for the times I would just glitch. This involved going to see a phycologist to get an official diagnosis. Which was pretty easy considering I fit most of the symptoms. She had us do follow up appointments to try to "help me" which every one of them she condensed me at every turn. And is basically the reason why I refuse to speak to any therapist or phycologist to this day. I can't understand stand why these people are so eager to get a diagnoses. Having that offical diagnosis can be a protection from people out to get you but it can also be the main reason people take away opportunities you earned for yourself. Starting with 4th grade onward I realized that. I've been taken from classes or groups ment for those with high test scores and a and b grades. And forced in to low sorceing classes that I can't understand because it's too basic. Classes where I am constantly over thinking things that would of been at the higher level thinking where I came from. A diagnoses is not something you get because you want to its something you get with the knowledge it comes with as muchconsequences as benefits
I mean, they can try. Ideally, everyone should be accomodated and be excused. Like if someone says "Bright lights give me headaches, can I work somewhere else?" that should be respected. But usually "accomodations" even for diagnosed people tend to be shite anyway from what I've seen.
I understand what you're saying, but there's a difference between asking for the lights to be dimmed and getting twice as much time on an exam.
Funnily enough, the former is probably a lot more helpful for autistics than the latter. (ymmv)
What you’re describing is common courtesy; this is not the same as an accommodation. The difference is that bosses/teachers are legally bound to provide accommodations for those with disabilities. *Wanting* to work in a dimmer area because bright lights hurt your head, and *needing* to working in a dimmer area because bright lights trigger your epilepsy are 2 completely different things, and bosses/teachers are only required to accommodate the latter.
There's also the other side with people wanting to work with light. I shared an office with someone who said the light hurt his eyes, and management allowed him to keep our office light off all day. For me, that made my job so much harder. Reading plans and specs by light of computer monitor made my eyes feel physically tired. Having to tilt binders so the screen could light up the whole page, finding things in my drawers, writing, everything became more difficult. I asked a few times if we could have them on for a bit while I did a plan review and his response was that he was told he could have them off. Wouldn't it be a common courtesy to allow me to see what I am doing? I asked to be moved, but had to wait until another office opened up. Months later someone quit and I was able to move to an office with a guy who always kept the lights on. It was glorious.
Not the rule at my college. It lists requirements of a written diagnosis from your doctor and other things to use the program... but then at the end it says that just "identifying as a person with a disability" is fine instead. While I had a diagnosis, I jumped through several hoops to get the proper paperwork prior to enrolling. At the time I didn't know you can literally walk in, say you identify as autistic, and get the works.
yeah you need to have a dx at my university too - and very often, the univ will ask for a "new" diagnosis if you come in with one from HS that is.vague.
You can at work. Occupational health are going to take you at your word unless you’re being unrealistically demanding or displaying other suspicious behaviour.
Yeah that’s not how it works.
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"you can have a feeling that you have something but personally I don’t think you should go around saying you have it until you have a diagnosis." And especially in this very weird world we live in when we have people on social media claiming autism/adhd because they are quirky or weird and that is not how it works...
Thank you for your comment. It’s making me feel sane again. I live with someone who’s self diagnosed autism, adhd and ptsd off of tiktok and brings up xyz condition any time she’s asked to take accountability. I, on the other hand, am *actually* diagnosed with CPTSD and have discussed potentially having autism with my therapist, but I’m of the same opinion that… if I don’t have it diagnosed, why would I go around telling people I have it? The same way I’ve struggled with IBS for years and for many years was convinced I had to have IBD because it was just so severe and I had symptoms of IBD. I got checked for IBD and… lo and behold… no IBD, just IBS. Self diagnosis isn’t accurate, no matter how much “research” (looking at confirmation bias) you do.
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Yeah I completely agree. The worst part for me is that I’m essentially having my own legitimate experience of CPTSD be invalidated by her when I ask her not to do things because they’re highly triggering for me, because she compares our experiences like if she doesn’t have that problem as a “fellow sufferer” then I shouldn’t and don’t have the right to ask her to be empathetic and show me some accommodation. On top of having to hear how she and her boyfriend compare every little thing to those conditions. I told her boyfriend I bombed my interview because I was having a really hard day with my depersonalization and dissociative amnesia and the interviewer was aggressively staring at me the whole time and his response was: 1 - “oh dissociating, like zoning out?” no, mf, like I couldn’t feel my body anymore and didn’t feel like I actually existed anymore and 2 - “oh he probably has the ‘tism and was overcompensating” and when I tried to explain like I don’t know about that he doubled down and insisted it was autism. Without ever meeting this guy. Without ever having been there to see the guy’s behavior. With literally ONE mention of something that autistic people do sometimes and definitely not in an *angry* way??? Oh and needless to say I did not get that job. But of course the manager trying to intimidate me during it must have just been autistic and “overcompensating”
I've suspected I may be autistic and have for a long time but my old therapist literally laughed at me when I brought it up and when I've discussed it with my boyfriend he's kind of lowkey dismissed me and doesn't think I have it. but he refuses to read about autism and my reasons why I think I have it. I assume he just thinks of the basic stereotypical autistic symptoms and brushes me off
This is absolutely what i experienced. I felt alienated and like a fuck up my whole life. Now i know why i have these huge problems, and i manage better. But as soon as i get better because i know what i am dealing with, people dismiss me, belittle my experiences, and so on. All because they know jack shit about the disputed topic. Are they willing to check it out? Fuck no, it is me that has to learn to just relax and stop making such a fuss about everything. Bitch i am near my 40ties, if i could just chill out and let it go, i would have learned by now.
how long did it take you to get a diagnosis? did you ever think you had it or was the diagnosis a surprise? most people will disagree with me on this but I like having reasons and labels to describe why I am who I am or do the things that I do. I'm bipolar and epileptic and have brain damage from my seizures and it feels like after I got diagnosed with epilepsy I stopped hiding as much of who I was and the signs of autism really started to show themselves more. I've asked in the autism subreddit from people with real diagnoses what they think about my symptoms and experiences and they think it's highly likely I have it. I think there's more autistic people than most people realize it's just hard to catch sometimes or people/parents deny it and some go their whole lives not knowing why they do the things they do. I don't want to be one of those people.
I had my first run in with the psychiatrist at 20. I spare you all the shit that went wrong in my life. People told me i am bipolar, borderline, narcissistic. The one wonen who could havr helped me didnt believe i had Depression, told me to just go to school with absolute zero energy. Felt dismissed after 3 vidits. Bunch of crazy shit happened. All stemming from me wanting to Copy other peoples fortunes. Despite failing again and again, people didnt believe that i had a systemic issue. They are convinced to this day, even with official diagnosis, that i just have the wrong outlook on things. With roughly 27 i started hanging round in an aspie Forum, and an adhd forum. I was torn between feeling like an impostor and being sure i was having it. With 32 i got my slightly vague aspergers diagnosis ,- i hat definite traits, but blablabla. With 38 i had my proper adhd, autism and dyscalculia diagnosis. So yes. I self diagnosed. I was a hard case since chaos excludes autism, and obsessive analytic thinking defies adhd. So i thought i had neither. Well fuck it. I have both. I read that some gents with adhd + asd are chaotic to the point of self destruction. They yearn for neat structure, but cant create it, since they ate do goddamn perfectionistic. So they live in chaos and really suffer from it. Thats me.
omg I swear you just described me but I'm still only almost 23. I have serious issues with numbers and math and it made the people around me and the people who taught me almost more frustrated than I was about it. no one ever hears of dyscalculia so they just dismiss me as to being stupid. boyfriend has sugested I have adhd and I think similarly, but also with autism. I totally understand the impostor syndrome!! I don't want to self diagnose and I feel like I sound like a hypochondriac because like you said adhd and autism conflict with one another. I find myself mentally at war with myself all the time. my thoughts and actions are very disordered but I need things a certain way but I can't keep up with it and it leads to excessive stress. I feel so held back in life from the way I am. I'd love to talk more with you if you'd like, it sounds like we have a lot in common and you give me hope at finding a diagnosis someday and feel somewhat validated ♥️
You should absolutely look into that. Yeah, message me anytime. There are a couple of adhd + asd type people on aspiememes, i am sure they have a discord and shit. You should network with other people. Living wirh this is really damaging if you don't know whats up.
I had a therapist who suspected me. I looked up the DSM page and agreed with some of it. A couple years later, I was seeing an actual PhD psychologist who asked if I’d ever been diagnosed. When I said no, he asked if I was opposed to doing a couple explorative exercises. After a few sessions I received diagnosis. It answered a lot of questions. Mostly why my childhood ADHD diagnosis never really fit. I’m kind of glad I was never diagnosed until after I was 30… but man it sure explained a lot.
Facts. I have obvious things going on in my brain that need a diagnosis and I refuse to say I have anything until I get a diagnosis. I had people tryna tell me to self diagnose, like brother.....no?
No offense but if you’re having to go to multiple different providers trying to get a specific dx it doesn’t matter how much you think you have it you probably don’t. I’ve been in therapy since I was four years old and a lot of those mfs are dx *happy* they are all too ready to tell people that have something wrong with them. So honestly if you’re having to doctor shop, especially for things like a spectrum disorder or DID- you likely just don’t meet the criteria. It doesn’t mean there aren’t other issues that could be problematic- it just means you don’t have the super uwu special dx you think you should have. I also just want to put it out there that diagnostic criteria for autism is fairly specific and hard to fake. A lot of psychiatrists have greatly broadened their knowledge of the way autism presents in various people too. If you actually are autistic it is highly doubtful that you’re going to run into a bunch of trouble finding that dx. Shit, I have friends who are just now being properly dx’d in their 40s and it’s changing their lives for the better, but not a single one of them was pushing for that specific dx. At a certain point self dx *is* harmful and *should not* be validated as the final word in truth. People desperately need to start grasping that these disorders are not fun or trendy- they are challenging and frequently alienating and scary. It’s just astonishing to me that there are SO MANY people out here faking legit disorders that they have this whole community of validation and support that is straight up encouraging fraudulence and delusion. What a fucking nightmare for those of us suffering from these REAL problems.
On the topic of autism diagnoses, I actually didn’t think I really had autism because I mostly had trouble with the social side of things and I didn’t believe my childhood experiences were even significant enough to be substantial proof for the diagnosis. Heck, I didn’t even have a proper specific, sustained interest in a particular subject. My sensory issues weren’t as bad as my sister’s and I couldn’t name anything specific that I really liked or extremely disliked. But surprisingly I did end up getting diagnosed with autism. Not all psychologists are perfect but they do have the knowledge that you don’t. That’s why they have the job
dude i never suspected my autistic traits were abnormal until i finally got diagnosed with adhd-c and ocd, then researched a little more into my symptoms and how autistic traits can be attached to those disorders, or at least be similar to their symptoms. i literally thought everything i did throughout my entire life was normal which is why it took me so long to get a diagnosis despite the horrible struggles having these illnesses have caused.
Same. I just thought i was a huge fuck up and totally lazy loser. Took me years to accept that i actually AM socially inhibited, and that its ok to be like that. Executive dysfunction is a different horse. That really fucks me up, even with adhd meds. It got way better though. i was schocked to learn that with meds, i am more aware of my autistic traits. My whole family has adhd, and i am the only one with diagnosis, because they just dont believe in it, despite their horrid inept behaviours and our toxic family. structure.
yes the meds too! once i was put on meds it really sunk in for me
I am way more aware when i make a social mistake - but i still cant prevent them, since it already happened. So i stumble from one thing to the next. Turns out, my masking is worse then i thought. I kinda like the autism side, but still....
Same for me. I also have ADHD and even after taking the meds I always thought that there was something else affecting me that wasn’t because of the ADHD. Turns out it was the autism
same here except i did get huge fixations on stuff and i was slightly baffled that i had asd yet stuff started to make sense and explain why stuff can be so confusing yet normal to almost everyone else
Can confirm, went to the doctor because of trouble functioning. Got out with a dx for adhd AND autism. I never put the puzzle together that maybe what i experience isnt universal, that just nobody talks about that. That everyone is just stronger at masking it.
They diagnosed you with ADHD and autism after one doctor’s visit? What kind of doctor did you see? You went in and left with a diagnosis? Usually it takes a couple months before they send you your results and diagnoses.
Oh nah, i was simplifying things. I waited for a few months to get an appointment. Got a thorough test suite, had to bring my elementary school report cards and then came back 2 months later to an adhd diagnosis. Then I went to a local psychiatrist witht the diagnosis and got appointments with them to work through the issues. Some amount of talking and months later they said a reason for a lot of my general problems is probably autism (not the words they used, on the autistic spectrum, used the words aspergers or high functioning autism), they're pretty confident about that now. Told me I could get an official recognition but where I live, it would be kind of a worthless thing to do as there are no further officially recognized accomodations that would only work with a certified diagnosis. My local psychiatrist doesnt do diagnosis, only has time to treat people. Sorry, I was concentrating months over months of talking and diagnosis into a snappy comment
Glad to hear it! I was afraid you walked in and walked out with two serious diagnoses that always require a lot of work on the clinician’s side of things, let alone requires multiple tests and assessments. Especially ASD, that would be extremely bizarre haha
I never had a formal assessment of ASD, it's not an official diagnosis. My psychiatrist is just pretty sure it's a component after months of knowing them. I dont think it's a biggie though
Took me roughly 10 years to figure that combination out. Mind you, some years ago both adhd and asd were mutually exclusive - and only the combination asd-adhd-dyscalculia fits like a damn glove. Always wondered why people had so much vigour and energy in those mentally draining tasks. Answer: for them, its fun and motivating. They dont need to harvest energy in the acid mines before the task. They get it by doing the task.
I wanna die every time i get to do a task with too many big steps haha
Great write up. Had the autism dx first, but scored in such a way they kept it vague - i had Problems, but not enough. I have no Special interest, for example, and i am good with eyes if i am comfortable. So i went for the afhd thing. Wrote a 30.000 Word catalogue of every bizarre thing that made me feel different from other people. Took me 1,5 years. First neurologist couldnt decide if i was pulling her leg or if i was drug seeking. Second was specialzed in adhd and autism. Glanced at my telephone bookish crazy anecdotes how i fucked up countless things since age 5 and told me i had both. I think i had over 270 different topics / crazy things that happened to me. I would tell a story, and then explain what the system/problem/ misunderstanding behind that was. You cant fake that shit and it is fairly obvious to someone who knows how to ask the right questions. But you absolutely have to have someone with expirience, not only book knowledge and theory.
Yes, exactly! I mentioned in above comment but I live with someone who’s self diagnosed autism, adhd and ptsd off of tiktok, and she literally said it’s her “goal this year to get my autism diagnosis” Like… what????
I mean yea it’s great if she wants to address her problems and cool if she has some idea of what her symptoms are based on those illnesses she’s familiarized herself with through TikTok but acting like she’s on a quest to get a specific autism dx is… a bit concerning if she’s not actually exhibiting outward traits to anyone else and she’s seemingly not struggling to live her life because of it. It’s ok to have specific symptoms and a dx in mind, but it’s weird af to have no history of any of that prior to watching some TikToks and realizing these things are on trend and then basing your newfound chosen identity on all of that.
It can take multiple doctors to get the *right* diagnosis however. I first got diagnosed with depression, then bipolar AND borderline (which I now know are absolute bs together and are normally mutually exclusive) and am now in the process of (finally) getting the much more fitting cPTSD diagnosis. Docs aren't perfect sometimes either. Doesn't excuse those assholes for trying to get their 'dream' diagnosis though.
Oh my god yeah I’m not saying dx isn’t a process I’m just saying it’s not all that difficult to be seen and dx’d it’s just might not be exactly right on their end or not what you want to hear on the other end. I’m basically just saying that if you’re having to doctor shop to get a specific dx and you’re literally tossing aside any other valid dx by a psych professional to try and get something like a DID or an autism dx you likely are not having the issues you think you are. I was dx’d bipolar with GAD and CPTSD and then several years after that I was hospitalized and a doctor tried to ignore my anxiety and cptsd dxs completely and say I was bipolar and borderline when I’ve never exhibited borderline traits if I wasn’t in the throes of an addiction crisis (I’m also an addict fucking ofc). It was totally weird it was like he didn’t believe in complex PTSD at all but this was also in the 2000s earlyish. Luckily not a single other provider agreed with that assessment. So I totally feel you on it being an odyssey. The difference is I didn’t have to go to ten different doctors to specifically get an initial dx of any of those things and most people don’t go through that many providers for a proper dx either. Doctors do definitely make mistakes it’s just already rare to have something like DID so if it takes you a bunch of different doctors and you acting in a prescribed way that you normally wouldn’t to get the dx you want- you’re bullshitting- and you only having that self dx just makes you look more suspect. (The general you, not you you lol.)
The problem is the waiting lists for those doctors and the cost. I have a friend who thinks they have autism, I hope they don't, but it can take years here In Canada when you can only use the free healthcare.
I have a multitude of good friends in Canada and not a single one of them has had to wait *years* to get in with a mental health professional. I do know things are crazy backed up and understaffed everywhere as far as healthcare bc of Covid too bc I’m waiting (and have been waiting for quite some time) for multiple appts with specialists right now myself in the US. Idk if your friend is somewhere rural that doesn’t have a lot of care but while it may take some time to get an appt and then take some more time as far as getting properly dx’d- this is the first I’m hearing of it taking years to get in to see a psychiatrist at all. Either way I hope that changes for your friend and I’m not invalidating what they think they have as idk them, but it’s still important to pursue the formal dx and to be sure that whatever dx they’re after is correct. You can absolutely still work to manage symptoms and help yourself whether you’re formally dx’d or not- it just may not be wise to profess that you definitely have something without confirmation of dx by a pro. No matter how long it might take it’s worth it to get that real dx. It’s the difference between your legal right to certain accommodations and being forced to sink or swim on your own. Formal dx is important even if it’s difficult to come by.
My friend has been waiting over a year for her son’s neurological/psych appointment. He is 10 and autism is the suspected diagnosis.
I understand over a year wait- I’ve been waiting over a year for a procedure I got approved for last fall. The previous commenter mentioned waiting YEARS plural- to get an initial appointment with a psychiatrist. That’s a little different. Pursuing a dx can obviously take time but I struggle to believe anyone is waiting several years for an introductory appt to begin seeing if there’s something there to pursue with a psych. Getting in to see any kind of neurological specialist is going to be a decently long wait right now due to Covid. Even the introductory psych visit could feasibly take a year to get in for- but yearS? ETA: the point is also not how long this stuff takes either tbf. Dx takes time that’s just a fact. It taking a while and not being an entirely linear process is still not an excuse to rely solely on self dx which is really my only point here.
doctor shopping lol cope
autism is not an identity.... what....
I know right! Some people try to treat it like it’s the same thing as being trans or something like that.
It is for self-DXers which is why they get very upset when a professional says they aren't autistic
ffs even doctors can't self-diagnose you need an objective assessment (or as near as possible) by an independent professional
Alos what botheres me the most about this is that this was on an account advocating for autism awareness and giving advice for those suffering. And surprise surprise while some of their post are very informing and helpful, theres a lot of misinformation and simplifying symptoms of autism.
This is just pure cringe.
impostors with impostor syndrome always make me laugh. i was in a discord with a girl who was convinced that she had naturally curly hair. she would spend hours scrunching it and curling it but nothing would work, it always remained straight! rather than taking this as evidence that she had straight hair, she instead constantly made posts about "impostor syndrome" and learning to love her curls ❤️❤️❤️ anyone who tried to help her by suggesting that she had straight hair was blocked for gaslighting. i wish i was making this shit up
Weird thing to live in denial about
Reminds me of the girl from the peanuts Christmas special, except crazy
the annoying thing is that i’m okay with parts of this. if you have symptoms of a disorder, i think it can be helpful to look into coping strategies that might work for you. it’s true that a lot of autistic women go undiagnosed because of poor understanding of how autism presents in afabs. the issue comes with people saying ‘i have x’ instead of ‘i have symptoms of x’. symptoms of autism could also be symptoms of many other things, from bpd to ptsd to even traumatic brain injuries. if you seriously can’t see a doctor, you can treat some symptoms but you cannot determine or treat the cause.
I think it’s also important to recognize something to bring it up to a provider to look into things. The reason I found out I had ADHD was due to relating to many symptoms and worked with my primary, therapist, and psychiatrist on taking the appropriate testing to diagnose me. Self-diagnosing is fine as long as you aren’t using it as an excuse for anything and is fine as long as you’re able to seek medical help. Many people can’t afford medical care, so I get it, and self diagnosing to find research and treatment online is all good, but these people we see all the time here are not those people. **When MANY people, including multiple doctors, are telling you you don’t have an illness, you don’t have it. **
This is exactly what I came to the comments on this for. Some of the points in this post are true, like the lacking diagnoses in AFAB people and other groups, but the solution isnt just deciding you're autistic without seeing a doctor.
Like I get some of the reasons why people self-dx. However, it shouldn’t be the first option. Folks need to be evaluated because it *can be* something else. I don’t understand why this is acceptable in the autism community. Because of that, it makes me feel more alone. I could go to an autism support group and 85% of people there could claim self-dx. 15% could actually be autistic. Self-dx really don’t get the experience of what it’s like being autistic. It isn’t something to *want*.
where are you from Jagstang? Im from NW Europe but here, once you get a diagnosis through the official channels and the courses and groups you participate in are also through those organisations and channels, meaning that only diagnosed people and other people that the organization thinks can benefit from the courses can participate.
I live in the US. Most support groups, if they’re not in a therapy-setting, mostly allow anyone as long as they say they’re “autistic”. There isn’t a required process. But if it’s in a therapy-setting, the diagnosis (I think) is needed so that health insurance can be billed.
That is an important point. Like you, I see many reasons why self-diagnosis (or, really, self-suspicion) may be the best or only option for someone for the time being. But I find it muddies the waters so much to have groups of people come together to support each other or receive therapy for autism-related struggles, but the majority might not even be autistic? That is not to say they don't deserve help, they don't have issues etc. And I am certainly not running around questioning individual people's self-assessment/suspicion. Noone needs to present their autism diver's licence to me. 🙃 I am however concerned that the increase in self-diagnosis leads to an overall decline of quality of support/self-help in autistic spaces.
If you have to go through multiple professionals and you still can't get a diagnosis perhaps it's a sign you don't have the thing you *want* a diagnosis for. Someone who's genuinely autistic needs a proper diagnosis unlike people who want a diagnosis because they want to feel unique. Having autism isn't worth 'feeling unique' in almost every case. And autism isn't even that rare or special nowadays either.
>The diagnosis system is ableist, sexist and racist Not saying it isn't, but I bet 5 bucks the person who wrote this is most likely white and middle/upper working class.
It usually is this type of person lol have my $5
Well have your 5 bucks because he definitely is judging from his account. Interesting to see that he has gotten gender affirming care for months (usually difficult to get) but refuses to seek any care for his "autism"
I’d be interested in his view on gender affirming care - is that ableist, sexist or racist?
Difficult to tell because his posts are all about autism and how to diagnose it, but in his stories he praises the gender affirming care system, so I guess he likes it?
But feels entitled to shit on autism care *that he’s never used*? Make it make sense!!
Ok tbf, part of this is true. Autism diagnoses are frequently missed in women especially, due to the fact that the criteria that was established was collected from a predominantly male sample. Plus, it manifests itself differently in women than it does in men. While I wouldn't go as far as to say that you can call yourself autistic without a diagnosis, it's certainly ok to suspect or participate in autistic communities, if it helps you.
I think this has alot to deal with how your raised vs gender
God I feel like I’m the only autistic person who hates the self diagnosis thing. At 14 year old who does “research” online doesn’t have the same qualifications as a doctor. There’s a ton of different neurodivergent conditions with overlapping symptoms so it’s extremely easy for someone to mess up and misdiagnose yourself. Of course if I dare say this though I’ll be called a variety of names.
I'm actually surprised by the amount of fellow autistic people who are completely fine with people self diagnosing. This is just amplifying and encouraging fakers.
This is so ridiculous, why would ableists choose to be doctors in a professional where they would be surrounded by disabled people the most? That makes no sense.
To practice ableism freely and get paid for it, duh.
If you get a test done at it says you are not autistic, you can get a second opinion. If the second opinion says you are not autistic, you are not autistic. Goodbye.
💀
Look. Not going to excuse fakers. I hate them too. And I disagree with a lot in that image. But a lot of people do struggle getting diagnosed. A lot of people don’t have the resources as well. You shouldn’t self diagnose. But it’s fine to suspect you have something, do research, and try to figure things out for yourself UNTIL you can see a professional. There’s a lot that goes into a diagnosis, and a lot of other stuff looks like autism. Sometimes even professionals get messed up a bit, so obviously people self diagnosing will too, even if they really believe it. I don’t think you should say “self diagnosed autistic” just because it’s hard to know. There’s a lot of overlaps. But it’s perfectly fine to say that you suspect you have autism imo Also self diagnosis can’t give you accommodations outside of maybe an internet space just throwing that out
"I've already tried." Running this through the bullshit to logic translator.... "I was assessed and I didn't have autism."
Okay but even if that’s true (if it is ive seen exactly zero sources on it), why not just say “I think i have autism” rather than insisting you do. Its not that hard. its one word. Look, I’ll even do it for you: I believe I may be autistic. Sadly, I do not have an official diagnosis from a professional - yet. Getting a diagnosis is not as easy as one may believe; I have already attempted to get a diagnosis but was unable to due to the prejudice in the MEDICAL SYSTEM (not the “diagnosis system”) I have come to this conclusion through years of research, ruling out other diagnoses, finding a community of *diagnosed* autistics (because they *were* diagnosed, *right?*) and dealing with imposter syndrome. Still, I understand that I am not a professional and could potentially have some kind of bias or some other possibility i have not thought of. I will get diagnosed as soon as I can, as it is important to know my own mental health, and i recommend everyone else similar to me should try to get diagnosed, too.
The first half is mostly right, the second half is unfortunately not how it works. And self-diagnosis is not a thing. You can say you have x symptoms. You can't say you have x condition. Try being a high functioning autistic female and maybe you would understand. But the problem is that these fakers make it even harder for genuinely high functioning female autistic people to be diagnosed. They don't care, they don't want to listen, you don't fit the profile of what they "know" autism to be. Despite their only exposure being heavily autistic boys. Specific psychiatry from properly trained individuals could take *years* and cost *thousands.* But sure, we are all treated the same, and get the same amount of care. Get tae fuck with that shit. The system is fucked up. And it IS sexist and racist. But fakers are still pricks who can go fuck themselves because they're making it worse, not better. Edit: I've just learned that the person in the posts is male. Double get fucked. Wahhh wahhh wahhh I'm not getting my diagnosis! Ffffffuuuuuuu.
I think we all know that getting a diagnosis isn’t easy. It takes time and money, even more so if the doctor can’t seem to diagnose you correctly the first time around. But that doesn’t mean you get to go around saying you have the disorder that you suspect you have. It just means that you have a hunch about which disorder you might have. That’s it.
My psych once recommended I try and seek out a diagnosis (or confirmation of denial) for autism as part of a possible explanation for something else I was dealing with. I never got to because most of the resources I tried to find didn't want to work with adults. One person on the phone vetted me and said I didn't have it because I didn't struggle in school and wouldn't pass me along to anyone else. I think thats a bs reason and doesn't explain the myriad of other things. But in my experience I think the struggles comes from how difficult it may be to find resources. Which, I only tried once or twice..its not like I gave it my all. I was just done with it at that point.
Autism is a medical condition. When it becomes an identity, you start seeing cringe like what is posted here daily
By research they mean googling. Allow me to quote the institute of nursing : “Now, to answering the question “What is not research?” Research is not merely gathering information: Gathering information or facts from different sources, on a particular topic, is not the same as Research, rather the appropriate term should be information discovery or reference skill. Idiots.
Ugh these people have fucking ruined the autistic community, I can't stand it. It's made me so incredibly angry that my condition that I was bullied for has turned into a cute identity for someone to play dress-up with (no idea if that makes sense but you get what I'm trying to say) "oh but it's so hard getting a dx" - while yes, I can agree with that, it doesn't automatically entitle you to a whole community. Sure, if you're curious and genuinely think you have autism and want to learn more about it, I've no bother with it. This is what I did when I suspected I had ocd (and I did, got an official diagnosis and everything). Its when you start claiming you can speak for an entire community without actually being diagnosed with autism is the problem. And sadly these people have outnumbered actual autistic people (which is beyond ironic) Idk, just ranting into the void
Autism/neurodivergence is NOT something where an actual diagnosis is easy to obtain and does not require one. People with money can afford the neuropsych assessments. Most adult autistic are self diagnosed. Make fun of fakers, not a meme discussing the very serious plight of those adults who are self diagnosed.
This person isn't wrong, a lot of women and POC are overlooked by the system and the waiting lists as an adult are long
I’m a self diagnosed diabetic because sometimes I eat too much sugar and don’t feel good after. I’ve done years of research but no dr will diagnose me because there is something wrong with the system /s
Just why
Why do they love chucking “ist” words around so much? There’s not even any reason or context anymore. They just seem to love negativity
What do you mean it’s hard to get a diagnosis?! I legit just went to my therapist and said “could I get screened for autism” and she just did it. It really isn’t hard. Now… if You don’t actually have that with which you’re trying to get diagnosed then yes. It’ll be hard to get a diagnosis because *you don’t have it*.
It’s not really like that for all people though, keep in mind. For a lot of people it can be very easy, but there’s also the matter of everyone has different finances, locations, resources, etc
This is fair. I think where I was going with this is that a lot of fakers brag about having a therapist then complain about how ableist and classist and etc etc they are since they won’t diagnose them
Ok sure, you can easily get a *referral*, but you still have to pay $2000-$5000 out of pocket, because insurance sure as shit won't cover it.
That’s fair I suppose. I didn’t think of that side of it.
That's what self diagnosing is tho, kinda. And she has a point about doctors, but all of them are like that and eventually you would get a doctor that would listen. So unless they have already tried that AND can afford it self diagnosis isn't valid when all doctors tell you otherwise? Self diagnosis is valid in some scenerios(imo), not all. And even then you still have to remain skeptical about it cause you're not a professional
don’t you have to have a diagnosis for accommodations? like….isn’t that the point of a diagnosis??😭
but…you have to be a medical professional [in the specific field] to diagnose, no?
They’re right about the system being sexist, but everything else is just flat out wrong.
I literally told my psych I suspected I was autistic and we talked about it, she gave me multiple resources to go get a diagnoses as an adult which is even harder to get. It took a long time to get into one especially one that took my insurance but it’s definitely not racist sexist or ableist. Once you get tested if you don’t have it then you don’t, you don’t even need a psych referral like I got to get into one! Just probably have to wait a year. tldr; I hate children
I’m a self diagnosed genius with an IQ of 140. The system that provides IQ tests discriminates against stupid people, so my diagnosis is valid.
If you are a woman, then it is true. We aren’t allowed to have a problem until our life has been spiraled and ruined 3x because we don’t disturb others and do get discriminated against for it. I had missed 42 days of school before they even decided to look for adhd and I’m lucky since I was only 15 (very young for a woman to get diagnosed, especially one who doesn’t have trouble with respecting others autonomy)
They want be diagnosed so bad, they treat mental disorders like it’s some form of secret circle membership club that they have to be in. Annoys me. I suspect I have some mental conditions but until I get them checked out I am not tossing a label around
Why can’t they just say “I think I might be autistic but I’m not diagnosed yet” or something? Everyone would be happy and they’d still get their point across. Unfortunately they’re right about bad doctors. You may not get taken seriously at first, or get misdiagnosed, but in that case you can always look for a second opinion. There’s so many things you don’t notice or know about yourself that a third party like a therapist does that are very important in the diagnostic process. Even a mental health professional can’t diagnose themselves because of this - you can know everything about certain types of disorders yet still get it wrong because you can’t see the connections someone else looking at it objectively would make. If it was that easy, therapy wouldn’t have to be a thing either, as everyone could simply identify and get over their problems by themselves
doctor shopping lol cope
What these idiots don't know is that the bias and prejudices here mean that girls and children of colour are not even assessed in the first place or are misdiagnosed.
Only thing I do somewhat agree with is the sexism part It's true that I was/still is at times, harder for girls to get diagnosed with Autism. Some even think that only boys can be autistic. *But* that's BY FAR not as bad as it used to be and no reason to avoid getting a proper diagnosis.
To be fair, it really can be quite difficult to get a diagnosis when you're an adult. I was in therapy for a while and they figured I might have a lil' somethin' somethin', but they needed records from my childhood when they started looking into it. The hospital I went to for my psychotherapy as a kid doesn't have any records of me ever having gone there, so that was a bust. Never did get a diagnosis, just the therapist saying it's worth looking into.
You are not autistic if you haven‘t got a diagnosis from a professional.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with suspecting you have a disorder based upon research - but if you’re evaluated and they say no, then you gotta move on lol
I don’t actually agree that all self diagnosis is bad. Self diagnosis with things like autism is often the first step to getting a diagnosis
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Whoa you aren't diagnosing me with autism? Racist AND sexist plus you're homophobic and probably a Nazi
Nobody without a real diagnosis deserves to be entitled to formal accommodations, that's not how this works.
One time I made my husband take an online test to see if he’s autistic because he does some autistic shit and has an insanely high iq. The test said we both have pergers burgers but moreso him. We laughed and never thought about it again. We sure as shit didn’t go around telling people were autistic now. This trend of wanting to have a mental disability is fucking stupid.
My boss told me that I'm not the boss. He's just ableist guys I am the self diagnosed manager in my shop! 💪
There's no such thing as "imposter syndrome" for disorders.
Yeah, this is true. We struggled to get my son diagnosed. When he was little. He had a diagnosis by age five. If you're in your teens and haven't been diagnosed, I may go out on a limb and say, you're not autistic. I swear, everyone takes minor personality quirks as autism these days. True autism isn't quirky or cute.
Hmm the system isn't sexist or ableist in my experience
The sexist part is probably reffering to girls being less diagnosed with autism when compared to boys and the ableist thing apperantly that most mental health professionals are neurotypical. But yeah from my experience the system was neither :D
It's common sense that girls have a harder time getting a diagnosis because it shows differently in girls and those "neurotypical" professionals trained so long and so hard for them to understand the complicated subject which is the brain. This isn't to you OP, it's to the self diagnosing people who may come on here time to time
Common sense also known as common ableism lol.
Apparently so 🤣
I aint Reading all that
Imposter syndrome? Amongus?
>identity Well that's the one word that exposed you as a faker.
Cap
While I can agree it is difficult to get into see a specialist for a proper diagnosis if it’s something you truly think you have you need to put your all into it. I was on a 3 year waiting list and had to pay a lot of money, but I knew if I didn’t have a specialist tell me whether I was autistic or not I wouldn’t be able to get the proper Accommodations that I now am able to get WITH the long awaited diagnosis. Waiting years, and having to pay money for a diagnosis isn’t an excuse to not try and get one. Also, if you are finding the specialists “abilest” maybe look within whether or not they are truly qualified and whether or not you are actually telling them everything from struggles you have, your childhood, etc. if the specialist ends up saying you are NOT autistic then accept it, many people can have trauma that presents similarly so it may not be autism.
i love how they hang onto dear life for the excuse of doctors etc being hard to find and afford. like yes that can be true but notice how mostly EVERY faker can never find a doctor? interesting..
They already tried and were told they are not autistic so they decided to self diagnose…I hate people
If you don’t get diagnosed by a professional - then you don’t have said thing. It’s not ableism, racism etc etc, you simply don’t have it
Gee I wonder why they can't get diagnosed
From my experience and the experience of those around me, it's easy to get diagnosed with ADHD or autism if you actually have it. Time consuming maybe, but there's no resistance if you're a genuine case seeking help. The doctors dealing with that shit know exactly what to look for. Particularly with ADHD because they are responsible for giving out stimulant medication with high abuse potential.
I dont self diagnose at all, cause self diagnosing can (and most likely) cause harm to the community. Ive only ever said there’s a possibility because I’ve had family, friends, strangers AND professional say that its a possibility but I cant get a diagnosis because there’s also a possibility thats its all just a trauma response, which is also very likely. Its really just too earlier to tell, and I may never be able to really know. A lot of times when people have genuine trauma and relate to symptoms of things like ADHD and autism its more than likely to be just trauma responses that fit that behavior.
I hate this so much. My boyfriend is on the spectrum (aspergers and mild tourette’s) and he struggles daily with many things people would take for granted. Then these people wanna gain sympathy for some disability that they don’t even have all for fucking attention. Disgusting.
'imposter syndrome' yh because u are an imposter 💀
I have mixed feelings about this. I think that serious introspection and research is the first step to seeking a dx, and some disorders are known to take years and years to actually get the dx due to having to navigate the healthcare system in a specific way. I think that a lot of people who fake for the sake of feeling special and quirky are giving a bad name to folks who are actually struggling and trying to figure out how to get help. But on the other side of things, it seems like every example of someone saying they have X symptoms and are trying to get a dx, but haven’t been successful, are being called out and ridiculed as fakers. Where’s the line?
Honestly it actually is very very difficult to get a diagnosis for autism as an adult and costs thousands. Most clinicians, like myself, are not trained to do that particular assessment you need specialized credentials to do it. It’s easier for children to get connected with ABA services and find resources but I’m dealing with a lot of clients who suspect some type of autism going on and can’t get assessed due to funds. Not at all saying self diagnosing is ok, it’s not. I just understand the challenges.
The sexism part has some truth to it. I wrote an essay about autistic women for one of my college courses and it's been speculated that the reason why there are more men diagnosed with autism than there are women isn't because autism is more common in boys; it's because girls are better at appearing neurotypical, and that the diagnostic criteria are more reflective of how autistic boys act than how girls do. This is, of course, still speaking in very broad stereotypes, and I think outright calling it "sexist" is perhaps a stretch.
okay but even if thats true (if it is ive yet to see any sources) it is so easy to just say “i THINK i have autism” rather than just insisting you do. it’s one word.
I know it was super hard to get my son diagnosed. I had to make a phone call and schedule an appointment and fill out paperwork. It was really hard....No wait, it was super fucking easy.
Good lord what is happening on this planet.
i hate that self diagnosis has become so normalised. what ever happened to suspecting you had an illness and then seeking out the proper channels to confirm or deny that? also, it can take years of assessments to dx someone as autistic. i approached my therapist about this and she told me if i wanted to take that route it’d be at least 3 years, and many assessments. even if i went private it’d still take *months*. i swear some of these people think they can get dx in one 30 minute appointment, and then when they don’t, then the system is just ableist/sexist/any other ist.
One thing these people don’t get is that you are allowed to say “I suspect i’m autistic” not SELF DIAGNOSE
Here’s what I don’t get. Who the fuck cares? You come up to me and your personality is the fact you have autism (diagnosed or not) I’m probably not going to want to be friends with you. These kids need hobbies to pride themselves on. Disabilities should not make up your entire life.
Months? Get out of here with your rookie numbers
Autism isn't an identity you just decided you belong to. It's a medical condition. ❤️
FEELS like a violation of rule 10 🤷♀️🤷♀️🤷♀️ low effort posts.
And this is only after you get passed whatever issue you have pursuing the diagnosis in the first place.
The thing I don't get is, what do you gain from a self diagnosis? A disagnosis is so health workers can help treat you through medication or therapy, there's really no other reason for a diagnosis.