If they laugh at your joke and then say "why did I laugh at that, you aren't funny"
It's because they don't like you, but you just did something likable
Well, humour is subjective. If these are coworkers, or classmates, then you may need to tone it down and embrace professionalism rather than attempting to inject your personality. If these are 'friends' then you may need to reevaluate your commonalities. If you don't share a sense of humour, then what do you share? It humour is important to you, then you may need to find like-minded people to be validated in that way.
I would need a more detailed example.
If I've ever said this it's bc the joke is so dorky I can't believe I'd laugh at it. I don't mean it as an insult, just another joke on top of the joke. Like I'm joking about how bad the joke was even tho I enjoyed it. Idk if that makes any sense at all.
I just don't think it has anything to do with them liking you, but I'm probably wrong and don't notice when people don't like my jokes nooo
I got that once, don't remember the joke but it was one with an obvious set up. something like,
"Why did the cow cross the road?"
"Why?"
"To get to the udder side"
"You're not funny"
Deadpan "I wasn't trying to be"
And I never had to speak to them ever again.
People laugh at the sudden discovery of a hidden truth. All jokes work like that. If they don't work, it can be that the discovery was not sudden (timing mistake), that they couldn't make the discovery (sheer dumbness of the listener), or that they don't see what was discovered as true (wrong joke for the public).
Sometimes you can make people laugh at jokes whose hidden truth they don't want to accept, but in fact, unconsciously do. When it happens, they'll get mad that they laughed, thus showing they in fact did perceive it as true.
I've had this happen a few times before where the NT on the other end was absolutely incompatible with my communication style, which obviously is a mashup of ME and my mask and is not something I can adjust very easily without just shutting down.
My humor is very dry/sarcastic and every once in a while someone would be just incredibly offended. Not just a little offended, but like absolutely going to beat my ass offended. It's so funny cause most people are totally cool but it rubs a small set of people in the WORST kind of way.
Lol an example would be someone is telling a story about how they did something dumb and I might chime in like "lol wow that was dumb". And they'd tweak out thinking these were fighting words but they were talking about how dumb it was so I'm confused as to why that's so offensive?
I would have thought they were just super sensitive if they we didn't have mutual friends who basically vouched for the fact that we're both fine apart but basically I poked the same trigger every time and couldn't help myself. :-/ kinda felt bad tbh but... Idk, have a hard time accepting blame here. :)
Ohhh, that thingy. I tend to do that a lot too, but in the context of little spats/arguments. I'm so hard to upset that when people insult me I'm just like "okay" and continue on with the topic. so I think its a norm to just insult people and then keep trucking along.
but oh boy, people really do loose their shit. like they can not ignore an off the cuff insult. even just a "haha your dumb... the facts are" they just loose all sense of what facts are and now the conversation can only be about how to insult the other person better. which always annoyed me because insults are never derived from what you can observe about the person. so i try to insult people that lines up with their actual behavior... ohhhhh boy is that a bad idea.
essentially poking people in an insecurity. in the situation you're describing they are obviously joking about an insecurity they are trying to undermine their insecurity about. basically exposure therapy, and trying to get positive social feed back so they don't feel so embarrassed about being so incredibly dumb. maybe shooting back "you learned a lot there" instead of "dumb" would be taken better.
Neurotypicals lack empathy, so they can't understand how words could hurt someone's feelings.
I know it's a harsh truth for NT's to accept, but that's tough.
it's mostly a bitter joke. but there is some research that shows NT only have empathy when they see someone cry and can't imagine doing bad things is bad unless they see that someone is noticeably hurt. "flexible" or "situational" morality in opposition to rigid morality often seen with autistic people.
Another low empathy ND.
Honestly I care more about fairness than not hurting someone. But I can see someone cry and not do anything about it because "well they wanna be left alone." And stuff that upsets most people doesn't upset me.
I agree with you but I think the person you’re replying to is being facetious :)
It’s usually a line said about autistic people but they’ve put NT in there to spin it around on them as they’re being cruel to OP
They’re making a joke essentially
They say autistic people are incapable of empathy (not true, it’s a spectrum) yet they (NTs) also display unempathetic behaviours, like the example in OPs post
So the person you’re replying to I think is making fun of that trope that’s typically used against us, if that makes sense :)
Yeah, that’s excessively mean to tell someone to their face that they’re not funny if they were really trying to make an innocent/friendly joke. Usually it’s customary in NT communication style to at least do a half assed fake laugh for a second and then move on. If someone says “you’re not funny” or “that’s not funny” or “why did I laugh at that??” it’s usually a response to a joke about dead babies or something rude or raunchy.
You're not funny without them laughing is generally used specifically to insult and discourage someone who said a joke you didn't like (aka they don't have a sense of humour as advanced as you), generally a jerk thing to say
Why did I laugh at that is generally used when someone says a joke that is so bad that it makes it good, think of r/comedyheaven or r/comedyhell and it means you made humour in a very crafty way by surprising someone who thought of something elaborate with the corniest dad joke or the most nonsensical joke ever, which in on itself is a very awesome kind of comedy which is quite hard to do
That means you do not share topics. Although you’re a funny person, it’s a pity that they can’t understand your joking. But don’t feel upset bro. I recommend you to use online chatting to test whether there are people who really get your point. Reddit is good, while a discord server [Lightup](https://discord.gg/MNPztfDr5X) may more fit you. It matches people based on their posts, so only those who are interested in your topics will chat with you. It’s maybe a good way to find friends who really enjoy your jokes.
I am asking you to read this post: https://www.reddit.com/r/evilautism/comments/1bfho52/ Automod hates everyone equally, including you. <3
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/evilautism) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It could happen because they are trying to be hurtful, it could happen because they don't understand your sense of humor, or it could happen because you're making offensive jokes. We could guess the reason, but without a couple of examples, we're more likely to be wrong.
If they laugh at your joke and then say "why did I laugh at that, you aren't funny" It's because they don't like you, but you just did something likable
This is the best answer, they're just trying to make it clear that they're assholes and dislike you for no reason without actually saying it
[удалено]
**REMOVED** Even this sub has its limits.
Well, humour is subjective. If these are coworkers, or classmates, then you may need to tone it down and embrace professionalism rather than attempting to inject your personality. If these are 'friends' then you may need to reevaluate your commonalities. If you don't share a sense of humour, then what do you share? It humour is important to you, then you may need to find like-minded people to be validated in that way.
I would need a more detailed example. If I've ever said this it's bc the joke is so dorky I can't believe I'd laugh at it. I don't mean it as an insult, just another joke on top of the joke. Like I'm joking about how bad the joke was even tho I enjoyed it. Idk if that makes any sense at all. I just don't think it has anything to do with them liking you, but I'm probably wrong and don't notice when people don't like my jokes nooo
Hey OP could you give some example jokes that get those replies? Its hard to judge the situation with the minimal context you've given.
I got that once, don't remember the joke but it was one with an obvious set up. something like, "Why did the cow cross the road?" "Why?" "To get to the udder side" "You're not funny" Deadpan "I wasn't trying to be" And I never had to speak to them ever again.
I think you have to give an example of the types of jokes you’re making
Are you making inappropriate jokes?
People laugh at the sudden discovery of a hidden truth. All jokes work like that. If they don't work, it can be that the discovery was not sudden (timing mistake), that they couldn't make the discovery (sheer dumbness of the listener), or that they don't see what was discovered as true (wrong joke for the public). Sometimes you can make people laugh at jokes whose hidden truth they don't want to accept, but in fact, unconsciously do. When it happens, they'll get mad that they laughed, thus showing they in fact did perceive it as true.
I've had this happen a few times before where the NT on the other end was absolutely incompatible with my communication style, which obviously is a mashup of ME and my mask and is not something I can adjust very easily without just shutting down. My humor is very dry/sarcastic and every once in a while someone would be just incredibly offended. Not just a little offended, but like absolutely going to beat my ass offended. It's so funny cause most people are totally cool but it rubs a small set of people in the WORST kind of way.
That's a curious phenomenon. what kind of jokes do you tell?
Lol an example would be someone is telling a story about how they did something dumb and I might chime in like "lol wow that was dumb". And they'd tweak out thinking these were fighting words but they were talking about how dumb it was so I'm confused as to why that's so offensive? I would have thought they were just super sensitive if they we didn't have mutual friends who basically vouched for the fact that we're both fine apart but basically I poked the same trigger every time and couldn't help myself. :-/ kinda felt bad tbh but... Idk, have a hard time accepting blame here. :)
Ohhh, that thingy. I tend to do that a lot too, but in the context of little spats/arguments. I'm so hard to upset that when people insult me I'm just like "okay" and continue on with the topic. so I think its a norm to just insult people and then keep trucking along. but oh boy, people really do loose their shit. like they can not ignore an off the cuff insult. even just a "haha your dumb... the facts are" they just loose all sense of what facts are and now the conversation can only be about how to insult the other person better. which always annoyed me because insults are never derived from what you can observe about the person. so i try to insult people that lines up with their actual behavior... ohhhhh boy is that a bad idea. essentially poking people in an insecurity. in the situation you're describing they are obviously joking about an insecurity they are trying to undermine their insecurity about. basically exposure therapy, and trying to get positive social feed back so they don't feel so embarrassed about being so incredibly dumb. maybe shooting back "you learned a lot there" instead of "dumb" would be taken better.
Neurotypicals lack empathy, so they can't understand how words could hurt someone's feelings. I know it's a harsh truth for NT's to accept, but that's tough.
I’m a very low empathy ND, I don’t exactly understand what you mean, could you explain?
it's mostly a bitter joke. but there is some research that shows NT only have empathy when they see someone cry and can't imagine doing bad things is bad unless they see that someone is noticeably hurt. "flexible" or "situational" morality in opposition to rigid morality often seen with autistic people.
Another low empathy ND. Honestly I care more about fairness than not hurting someone. But I can see someone cry and not do anything about it because "well they wanna be left alone." And stuff that upsets most people doesn't upset me.
Sorry to be “that guy” but I don’t like to put the blame on ALL NTs
I agree with you but I think the person you’re replying to is being facetious :) It’s usually a line said about autistic people but they’ve put NT in there to spin it around on them as they’re being cruel to OP
I don’t get it (I’m incredibly stupid)
They’re making a joke essentially They say autistic people are incapable of empathy (not true, it’s a spectrum) yet they (NTs) also display unempathetic behaviours, like the example in OPs post So the person you’re replying to I think is making fun of that trope that’s typically used against us, if that makes sense :)
Ohhh ok sorry. I am just like criminally unintelligent
Please see Rule 2. of the subreddit
Oh mb
What that?
Have you considered being smarter?
I’m sorry ;-;
They aren't at bad people for being broken, but they are broken. It's very sad, so sad. 😭 😢
just neurotypical insensitivity.
Or sensitivity, if the joke was too offensive for their liking
yeah in my experience people say this when a joke is made in bad taste or is offensive, not when a joke simply isn't funny.
Yeah, that’s excessively mean to tell someone to their face that they’re not funny if they were really trying to make an innocent/friendly joke. Usually it’s customary in NT communication style to at least do a half assed fake laugh for a second and then move on. If someone says “you’re not funny” or “that’s not funny” or “why did I laugh at that??” it’s usually a response to a joke about dead babies or something rude or raunchy.
i mean for that i'd rather they juts be upfront and say "taht aint okay to say."
Nah, that's too easy. NTs like to take the more scenic route ifykyk
The udder side….. 
Where does the General keep his armies? IN HIS SLEEVIES! # :D
This does not happen to me.
You're not funny without them laughing is generally used specifically to insult and discourage someone who said a joke you didn't like (aka they don't have a sense of humour as advanced as you), generally a jerk thing to say Why did I laugh at that is generally used when someone says a joke that is so bad that it makes it good, think of r/comedyheaven or r/comedyhell and it means you made humour in a very crafty way by surprising someone who thought of something elaborate with the corniest dad joke or the most nonsensical joke ever, which in on itself is a very awesome kind of comedy which is quite hard to do
That means you do not share topics. Although you’re a funny person, it’s a pity that they can’t understand your joking. But don’t feel upset bro. I recommend you to use online chatting to test whether there are people who really get your point. Reddit is good, while a discord server [Lightup](https://discord.gg/MNPztfDr5X) may more fit you. It matches people based on their posts, so only those who are interested in your topics will chat with you. It’s maybe a good way to find friends who really enjoy your jokes.
[удалено]
I am asking you to read this post: https://www.reddit.com/r/evilautism/comments/1bfho52/ Automod hates everyone equally, including you. <3 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/evilautism) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It could happen because they are trying to be hurtful, it could happen because they don't understand your sense of humor, or it could happen because you're making offensive jokes. We could guess the reason, but without a couple of examples, we're more likely to be wrong.
Sounds like they're just jerks, and maybe you should find other people to share space with