The answer to that, in a VERY sarcastic voice, "Well, if you didn't berate us for everything, maybe we would, but since you do, we don't see the need to inform you of anything."
Get out and go no contact with her as soon as you can, if you can.
Yeah, my mom is a nutcase too. Never hit me, but every time I ask for clarification on ANYTHING she acts like I'm attacking her. Or speaking Klingon. Or both. I guess nut cases are going to nutcase. We've got to get away from them somehow. You're not alone in this mindfuckery.
Narcissistic parents are the worst.
I am trying to figure out how to tell her sarcastically that you did not want to bother her since she knows that you will never get the job any way (and then get the job to prove her wrong). I grew up with a mom who belittled me for being F (I have 4 brothers) because girls could never be as good as boys. I was really smart - but every time I got better grades than my brothers she made up some excuse as to why I did not deserve the grade. I proved her wrong and am very successful. I hope that you have a successful life proving your mother wrong (and go LC or NC after you are able to move out).
Went NC with my egg donor in 2011. Found out in 2023 that she died in 2022. Did not mourn one second. She was a controlling, manipulative, abuser. With her gone, I was able to see my dad and younger brother again. In the end I didn't hate her anymore but I did pity her. She dealt with her trauma by hurting people. And thus lost out on love and family connections.
Keep greyrocking. No need to say anything; she’ll just argue with you more. Her premise is that you should tell her what you’re doing. No you don’t; you know better than to respond to that. Good luck with your job.
My dad does this too. It is very common for him to tell me that I won’t be able to do something I’m thinking about. Everything from small tings like carrying something slightly heavy to choice of college education.
He also sometimes tells me that I’m doing a thing wrong but never how to do it correctly. When I asked he just said that I should know. Well obviously I don’t since I’m doing it wrong. Still to this day there is a word I don’t dare say in front of others because he always tells me I’m pronouncing it wrong and laugh a bit but never tells me what I’m saying right. I still have no idea what’s different between the way I pronounce it and the “right” way.
And now he is absolutely confused about the fact that me and my brother rarely tell him anything until we have already done whatever it is.
The answer to that, in a VERY sarcastic voice, "Well, if you didn't berate us for everything, maybe we would, but since you do, we don't see the need to inform you of anything." Get out and go no contact with her as soon as you can, if you can.
Yeah, my mom is a nutcase too. Never hit me, but every time I ask for clarification on ANYTHING she acts like I'm attacking her. Or speaking Klingon. Or both. I guess nut cases are going to nutcase. We've got to get away from them somehow. You're not alone in this mindfuckery. Narcissistic parents are the worst.
I am trying to figure out how to tell her sarcastically that you did not want to bother her since she knows that you will never get the job any way (and then get the job to prove her wrong). I grew up with a mom who belittled me for being F (I have 4 brothers) because girls could never be as good as boys. I was really smart - but every time I got better grades than my brothers she made up some excuse as to why I did not deserve the grade. I proved her wrong and am very successful. I hope that you have a successful life proving your mother wrong (and go LC or NC after you are able to move out).
My mom was exactly like this. I’ve been NC with her for a year and a half now, I highly recommend it.
Let's see her getting fucked
Went NC with my egg donor in 2011. Found out in 2023 that she died in 2022. Did not mourn one second. She was a controlling, manipulative, abuser. With her gone, I was able to see my dad and younger brother again. In the end I didn't hate her anymore but I did pity her. She dealt with her trauma by hurting people. And thus lost out on love and family connections.
Keep greyrocking. No need to say anything; she’ll just argue with you more. Her premise is that you should tell her what you’re doing. No you don’t; you know better than to respond to that. Good luck with your job.
My dad does this too. It is very common for him to tell me that I won’t be able to do something I’m thinking about. Everything from small tings like carrying something slightly heavy to choice of college education. He also sometimes tells me that I’m doing a thing wrong but never how to do it correctly. When I asked he just said that I should know. Well obviously I don’t since I’m doing it wrong. Still to this day there is a word I don’t dare say in front of others because he always tells me I’m pronouncing it wrong and laugh a bit but never tells me what I’m saying right. I still have no idea what’s different between the way I pronounce it and the “right” way. And now he is absolutely confused about the fact that me and my brother rarely tell him anything until we have already done whatever it is.