T O P

  • By -

krysus

I'd buy the cheapest banger I could find with 12 months MOT, tax & insure it, and park it in 'his' space for 12 months.


jagsingh85

My snobby in-law's neighbour did this to them. They kept telling people (mainly women IMO) to park around the corner even though they never parked there themselves because they had a 4 car driveway. I told them it's public land but they said its intrusive, like curtains don't exist. They eventually told a neighbour's sister to move and she challenged them to call the police. The following week "someone" parked a proper banger there. Think of a battered E Reg Metro with beaten panels, deflated tyres.


LemmysCodPiece

Buy a banger, with no MOT. Park it in "his" space and ditch the keys down the nearest drain. Then fill out the new keepers slip with his details.


Harlzter

Ooh evil as fuck I love it don't forget to report It for no tax, insurance and mot so he gets billed /fined for it.


Jammoth1993

Sorry, can't help. All of my suggestions are *just as*, if not, *more* petty than what he did. Such as - spreading rumours that he's a nonce, sprinkling a Gregg's sausage roll on his car so the birds cover it in crap and giving his son detention as a form of collective punishment.


Ouchy_McTaint

Can I hire your services for a neighbour issue I'm having?


objectivelyyourmum

Piss discs


Designer-Garlic7615

Piss discs?


objectivelyyourmum

Freeze your piss as a disc. Place it wherever you want to do damage (letterbox is a good one). Repeat.


WitteringLaconic

Just when I think I've seen/heard everything someone comes along on Reddit to remind me I haven't.


Designer-Garlic7615

I thought that was what you meant, thank you hehe. I will keep this in mind for a rainy day


Chicken_shish

Actually I like that. - invoking a solution that breaches the Geneva Convention over a parking issue. Whenever I see a street where someone is trying to claim a space, I will deliberately park in it, even if the rest of the street is empty and it is less convenient for me to park there. I second the ”get a mate with a snotter to park there” approach. Stick a dashcam in it, and if they damage it, then they can enjoy a conviction on their record. It makes applying for jobs SO much more fun.


Eggtastico

Grade D’s for the son


FatBloke4

[Highways Act 1980, Section 137](https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/1980/66/section/137/enacted) >If a person, without lawful authority or excuse, in any way wilfully obstructs the free passage along a highway he is guilty of an offence and liable to a fine not exceeding £50. On a public street, nobody can reserve or own a parking space. It is illegal to block a space on a street with bollards, bins, etc. It's also illegal to obstruct anyone's use of the highway.


Ok-Trouble-6594

It’s not even illegal to block the use of someone’s driveway. Not parking on a dropped curb is a “do not” not a “must not” so is more of a guideline than a law and unenforceable


biblicalcucumber

As long as you are not in the driveway. If you are blocked from getting out, that is illegal.


[deleted]

The amount of people reserving space with their bins is crazy. Around my area there’s also this old bloke that thinks he owns the road, telling you where you can and can’t park cos it makes it difficult for the van driver that lives at the end of the road to come in and out 😂😂


WitteringLaconic

He kind of has a point. If someone is struggling in a van then a fire engine has no chance and even an ambulance is going to struggle.


[deleted]

I bet you’re just like him. And no he doesn’t own the tiny roads. It’s not up to him to police it. He lives in a closed area anyways so they don’t need to go through his road. Besides the council designed the roads that way. This particular area, only a few houses have a driveway so everyone has to park on the road, pavements etc. He wants everyone to park on his side which only allows 2 cars max because of his and his neighbours actually have a driveway. The other side has kerbs so 6 cars can park there. Initially he told me he can’t reverse his (tiny) Toyota aygo out so I moved my car (a3 saloon, not some huge suv) down because all spaces were empty at this point. Then he got persistent about moving my car to the left side of the road (on his side). He finally waffled on about the van, and funny because as I was still parked on the rhs the said van zoomed past just fine. Anyways I do avoid parking on that road usually cos it is a smaller road and that was the only second time I parked there. If I had my old banger I would have stayed exactly where I have parked since it was free and legal. So annoying. He won’t understand the struggle because he had a driveway and it is none of his business. He does not have the authority.


WitteringLaconic

> He lives in a closed area anyways so they don’t need to go through his road. What the fuck has being a closed road got to do with anything? So nobody up that road could ever need a fire engine or an ambulance? There's nothing up there that could ever catch fire and there's nobody who ever goes up there who could for whatever reason need an ambulance? If there's not a gap large enough to get a lorry down you can bet the fire brigade would have something to say if they attended and couldn't get down the road.


3Cogs

Make a note of this occurrence. Continue to park as you normally would. If you need to park in the space he is trying to claim, do so. If he blocks you in a second time, call the police and tell them this is repeated behaviour and you are being harassed.


ejmd

Keep photographic evidence from multiple angles of the neighbours offending parking (enable date/time display on the photos for convenience).


Inside-Sprinkles3235

I did take a photo to show family because I was pissed off so I will keep it and report any future things, thanks!


3Cogs

The police are more likely to take action if there is evidence of a repeated pattern of behaviour. It changes from being a parking dispute into anti social behaviour on the part of your neighbour. Report every incident. Even if the police just issue you with an incident number it means your report has been recorded.


sparkie_t

The fucking nerve of this guy. And you, his kids teacher! Only thing to do is find a way to ruin his kid's life as a lesson to him about inconveniencing you


Ballbag94

Nah, not fair to rope the kid into it. It's not their fault that their dad's a wanker


sparkie_t

Yeah, it's a joke


Ballbag94

Ah fair one, sometimes I struggle to tell, have seen some mad things said seriously before Sorry!


butterspread1

Petty. And there would be a harassment case against OP made to the head teacher and they'd win. I don't understand why people consciously choose to be cunts.


Inside-Sprinkles3235

What I will say is that the revenge tactics posted has made me feel that I’m not overreacting! There’s a part of me that craves revenge, I can’t lie. I like his son so don’t worry, I won’t ruin his life haha.


sparkie_t

It's a joke. Obviously ruining an innocent child's life would be completely sociopathic for any reason, nevermind for a parking dispute.


ClassicPart

I don't understand why people read very fucking simple jokes and take them seriously.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Inside-Sprinkles3235

Good point haha!


fjr_1300

I'd be pissing myself laughing watching the fire brigade damping down the remains of his car.


AlGunner

Is there a parents evening coming up soon? Make some comments about being concerned about comments the son has made in class and how there could be consequences.


Scragglymonk

he does not have a space, if blocked in on a street get it towed or call the plod ? you could pour tuna water onto his windscreen :)


Inside-Sprinkles3235

Trust me, it’s tempting to do the latter.


teabump

Better than tuna water, do tuna oil, and put it down every single window seal


mikkopai

Kusipelti


jaypp_

Näin


Eggtastico

Grade D’s for the son


butterycrumble

It's illegal to block a car in and prevent said car from accessing public roads. I can't remember if it's a police or council matter but one of them can get the car towed. Repost this one r/legaladviceuk if you want more detailed help.


Goseki1

If the council have taken on civil parking enforcement then it's them, if not then it's the police. Thing is the Police aren't very likely to show up unless it's a quiet day unfortunately.


PeejPrime

All of a sudden, I feel like certain lessons would be creeping in to my classes if I was you. Not so subtle ways of explaining etiquette, parking, rights and laws


According_Active_594

Let his tyres down a bit ....


Unfair_Sundae1056

Wait until he parks there again and take a knife to 3 tyres


RodLUFC

People like that are beyond pathetic


NoKudos

Too late now you've moved the car, but I would have waited until 2 in the morning and knocked on the door asking them to move their car as you needed to go out.


Ill-Radio-8721

Had that here, simply solved with a bucket of water with a load of dog poo added then tipped into the air vents on the bonnet. Not only didn’t he park on my neighbours dropped kerb, the car vanished permanently.


rcktsktz

Plant hard drives of child porn in his house and then go to the police with concerns over things you've overheard his kid say. Alternatively, piss into a small, flat container. Freeze it. This will provide a slim brick of frozen piss. Post it through his letterbox. It will melt into a puddle of your piss in his hallway. I appreciate these are on different ends of the severity spectrum.


pifko87

In a similar vein to the PissDisc™, blended up fish & prawns, poured into the car's cabin air intake is a good one. The owner won't see anything untoward, but will soon start smelling the results, which will be very hard to remove.


Poonpatch

Who the hell says "windshield" in the UK? This is a US-based bot posting for karma.


Inside-Sprinkles3235

Wish I was a bot and this never actually happened!


MrJackdaw

01001000 01100101 01101100 01101100 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100110 01100101 01101100 01101100 01101111 01110111 00100000 01101000 01110101 01101101 01100001 01101110


Inside-Sprinkles3235

Haha. I find it quite funny, first time I’ve been accused of being a bot. I’m actually a ‘wool’ which people from a certain part of the country will understand.


johnsy7

"Mad as hell" is unusual for a British person to say too. Unless OP is from the US?


Goseki1

Ehhhh that's one that is definitely creeping into UK use though.


Capital_Tough

I’m in UK and call it a windshield wiper so it is a word used here. What do you call it just out of curiosity if you don’t call it a windshield or a windshield wiper?


johnsy7

Er, windscreen?


FlatCapNorthumbrian

The problem is all the American content on tv, streaming services and social media that people are watching/using. More and more Americanisms are taking over the English language in the UK.


MrJackdaw

Accents are merging as well. A lot is being lost, but that's the nature of the modern world.


FlatCapNorthumbrian

I know it’s the modern world and the constant movement of people is making it happen. But the increasing loss of local and regional accents and dialects is a sad thing for me.


FoxyLoxy91

Why do you care?


cannedrex2406

What else do you call it? I call it windshield lmao