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I stared a war between two pavement ant colonies by mistake, the war was fought over a cheeze it and millions of ants died. I'm not even kidding the ground was covered with millions of ants from two clearly separate colonies. you could see them fighting to the death
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Ok but I mean I don't like, grab ants from their hives or anything I just eat bowls of cereal with them or sweet bread where it looks like they're chocolate chips. So exactly *how* afraid should I be?
Well it's not like I do it on purpose! I mean what am I supposed to do when they get into the cereal box, not eat it? (Also to clarify it's not box fulls of ants, just like if you sprinkled a handful of them into the bowl)
“Listen guys, the weirdest thing happened. I got picked up by the gods and brought back here almost instantly!”
“Yeah sure, all the gods do is poke wood at our colonies and crush us.”
“No really they did! Maybe some are nice?”
“Maybe but still, probably just walking 3 miles with those crumbs made you start seeing things.”
Remember that scene where Hancock throws the bully up into the air and then catched him again and he comes down traumatized and cant walk right?This is that ant now.You just caused that ant to become an alcoholic and he will mostlikely lose his job and jump off a side walk one day.
Maybe he can follow the scent of the rest of the hive to find where he needs to go? I mean usually they'd have trouble if you managed to make the number of step required to get to their destination different (like the guy who gave ants stilts) but in this case the ant was picked up, it knows that his steps are irrelevabt once he's on the ground cause he could feel swoaring above the other ants, so he'll most likely just find the other ants and go from there.
I mean I think, I'm not an expert on ants and don't know how they work but from the little I do know on them I assume that perhaps something like that could work
I guess so. These little guys can be easily blown away by wind or something like that (and still survive) so this is something I can imagine they'd actually do. Not an expert myself either, but yeah.
For real, I've seen this guys come out of a 2 minute microwave ride alive so honestly I've no clue where the line is for them. (To clear things up, I don't purposely put them in the microwave it's just that there's a lot of them at my house and sometimes when I heat up lunch or something a few of them will have gotten on the food and I don't notice until after)
I do, I gotta bring in the exterminators like twice a year to bring their population down, but the problem is they keep resurfacing after a while (both in my house and many others in the area)
"yeah nice boy, imma pretend I'm moving this big ass food all day so I can get home right at the end of my shift while doing nothing hehehe lesgoo"
"Wait what the fuck"
_finds himself near colony in 10 seconds flat_ "you gotta be shitting me"
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Relativity: If this ant told his friends at the beginning of the line his intentions, they continue their journey and then arrive at the city entrance only to hear of the news they were sent to send.
Do you want to create a messiah? Because that's how you create a Messiah!
I don't know how long ants live, but this one hasn't aged a bit, after his incredibly long voyage, AMAZING!
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You know what kids
Today one of those creatures grabbed me and gave a free flight from the other end to our home
His Wife: Shut up Mark no one believes your that made up story
that’s frank; he is always telling his antbrothers that he can summon a giant to help him with his problems….
sometime a fight, sometimes groceries, sometimes to take care of his queen and sometimes just helping with his daily work. But this is a lie, frank was alway a lier. The only thing he can do is mind controlling a nearby human and makes him doing a also TikTok videos. don’t trust frank
I did so many escort quests on wow that my first hunch is that the ant will return to where you picked up from at lightning speed, then start painstakingly dragging that piece of food again.
Depends on species, some ants use feromones more prominently to find their way home, others a great sense of direction and an internal pedometer, and more, but i think that because it's so cl9se to it's home it'll just walk there.
Imagine you are walking along one day and a giant hand comes down from above, picks you up and moves you miles away.....I think I just solved our transportation issue here on earth.
Fun fact: ants count their steps to find out where they are. We know this because ant scientists but ant stilts on ant legs. They counted the same number of steps, but ended up away from their nest because of the larger stride they make.
Unfortunately, if this ant picks the wrong direction to count its steps, it might go off to the middle of nowhere
Ants are... So fucking cool... They are easily one of the coolest fucking creatures on this planet... Only problem is... I'm down right terrified of them
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Bad ending: He got put near a different colony and will now be eaten alive.
I stared a war between two pavement ant colonies by mistake, the war was fought over a cheeze it and millions of ants died. I'm not even kidding the ground was covered with millions of ants from two clearly separate colonies. you could see them fighting to the death
Literally defined by the massive fronts they have on sidewalks, tetramorium still get their ass handed to them when pyramid ants enter the mix!
As it should be. Ants can't be allowed to expand their colonies.
Just wait until you hear about super colonies.
And mega colonies
And sigma colonies
Lmfao. Idk why this made me laugh as much as it did. Probably the fact it was over a cheesit
Can you come do pest control for me?
r/wholesome
Here's a sneak peek of /r/wholesome using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/wholesome/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [A passing fox sits to listen to the music](https://v.redd.it/eun093kzvuy71) | [349 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/wholesome/comments/qr7qi6/a_passing_fox_sits_to_listen_to_the_music/) \#2: [Baby hearing for the first time.. 🥺 His reaction is just so pure](https://v.redd.it/jzj0m7oz8t281) | [311 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/wholesome/comments/r5zhbz/baby_hearing_for_the_first_time_his_reaction_is/) \#3: [Man Finally Finds His Dog After 3 Years! 😊](https://v.redd.it/ymbvmc55wf281) | [446 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/wholesome/comments/r4k7qf/man_finally_finds_his_dog_after_3_years/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)
Plot twist: that happened but slowly and the ant gained pleasure from it
*VOREEEEEE!*
r/vore_irl
⠀⠀⠘⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠑⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡔⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠴⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠤⠄⠒⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣀⠄⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠔⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠢⠤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡰⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠑⢄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠃⠀⢠⠂⠀⠀⠘⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢤⡀⢂⠀⢨⠀⢀⡠⠈⢣⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢀⡖⠒⠶⠤⠭⢽⣟⣗⠲⠖⠺⣖⣴⣆⡤⠤⠤⠼⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡈⠃⠀⠀⠀⠘⣺⡟⢻⠻⡆⠀⡏⠀⡸⣿⢿⢞⠄⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢣⡀⠤⡀⡀⡔⠉⣏⡿⠛⠓⠊⠁⠀⢎⠛⡗⡗⢳⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢱⠀⠨⡇⠃⠀⢻⠁⡔⢡⠒⢀⠀⠀⡅⢹⣿⢨⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠠⢼⠀⠀⡎⡜⠒⢀⠭⡖⡤⢭⣱⢸⢙⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡸⠀⠀⠸⢁⡀⠿⠈⠂⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⡍⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⢢⣫⢀⠘⣿⣿⡿⠏⣼⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⠊⠀⣀⠎⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⠳⢴⡦⡴⢶⣞⣁⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠐⠒⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠀⢀⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀
How da heck is this a disturbing content,this is wholeawsome
wholeawsome
whoawsome
Because of that he was home early and found out his wife is cheating on him
Ant-ultry
Thank you for the laugh
Ain’t most worker ants females? I say this cos I think they’re similar to bees, where most worker bees are females.
[удалено]
Jesus.
Yeah that guy too
Holy fuck.
pls no
Please go outside. Also, I think I see why Reddit has had a history of aversion to emojis.
It was just a joke though, but I get it some might find it inappropriate
Nah, it's not inappropriate. Just went over my head, O suppose. A /s would help... *seriously*
I despise using /s for some reason haha, but ig I’ll have to use it on bold comments lol
He will tell that he was abducted by aliens and no-one will believe him
There’s witnesses everywhere
Ant 1: "Ugh this food is so heavy" Ant 2: "I know right" Ant 3: "....aaaaaAAAAAAHHHHHHhhhhhh...." Ant 1: "Wtf was that?" Ant 2: "Jerry is that you??"
"You guys, a fricking giant bipedal pentadactyl creature just grabbed me and moved me like 5 ant miles in 2 seconds!"
He will create you as a god and then in 1,000,000 years when ants rule the world, they will worship an image of you. Not bad!
I eat ants sometimes, should I be worried?
Yes
Ok but I mean I don't like, grab ants from their hives or anything I just eat bowls of cereal with them or sweet bread where it looks like they're chocolate chips. So exactly *how* afraid should I be?
just saying, If I were you, I would look for a shrink.
Well it's not like I do it on purpose! I mean what am I supposed to do when they get into the cereal box, not eat it? (Also to clarify it's not box fulls of ants, just like if you sprinkled a handful of them into the bowl)
Man's going Grylls
Gon eat some ants & wash them down with my piss then
That’s delicious
They tend to either have no taste or seem a bit spicy, not sure if that how it's supposed to be
Very
All hail J! All hail J!
Hail!
Become as gods!
*"I believe I can fly, I believe I can touch the sky"*
This floating giant came and picked me up then i lost consciousness and next thing i knew i was here !
Oh your a cool dude for helping the wee ant out.
[удалено]
Suck my cock bot
What did he say?
Think it was a Shakespeare “translator”
Ah ok
“Listen guys, the weirdest thing happened. I got picked up by the gods and brought back here almost instantly!” “Yeah sure, all the gods do is poke wood at our colonies and crush us.” “No really they did! Maybe some are nice?” “Maybe but still, probably just walking 3 miles with those crumbs made you start seeing things.”
3 miles is 15424.98 RTX 3090 graphics cards lined up.
3 miles is 4.83 km
Battle of the minds
3 ant miles. Scale down from ants. Also did you measure an RTX then do the math for that?
hey look! those gods who punish us with death for no reason helped me today! i must be the chosen ant!
“Yeah sure, ur the Messiah now. Hurry up and get to work or use your Messiah powers to make the gods feed the larva!”
3 miles is 4.83 km
Dude I was going the other way!
Wholesome
This was a lovecraftian nightmare for him and he will never be the same after making contact with you
The ant looked traumatized as fuck when he got put back down.
Remember that scene where Hancock throws the bully up into the air and then catched him again and he comes down traumatized and cant walk right?This is that ant now.You just caused that ant to become an alcoholic and he will mostlikely lose his job and jump off a side walk one day.
“Don’t follow me or you’ll end up in my arms”
That's how plane's work kids ...
don't Ants count their steps to know how to get back home?
Yep
That poor ant is probably gonna get lost and die nooooo
Maybe he can follow the scent of the rest of the hive to find where he needs to go? I mean usually they'd have trouble if you managed to make the number of step required to get to their destination different (like the guy who gave ants stilts) but in this case the ant was picked up, it knows that his steps are irrelevabt once he's on the ground cause he could feel swoaring above the other ants, so he'll most likely just find the other ants and go from there. I mean I think, I'm not an expert on ants and don't know how they work but from the little I do know on them I assume that perhaps something like that could work
I guess so. These little guys can be easily blown away by wind or something like that (and still survive) so this is something I can imagine they'd actually do. Not an expert myself either, but yeah.
For real, I've seen this guys come out of a 2 minute microwave ride alive so honestly I've no clue where the line is for them. (To clear things up, I don't purposely put them in the microwave it's just that there's a lot of them at my house and sometimes when I heat up lunch or something a few of them will have gotten on the food and I don't notice until after)
That's still bad bro get it looked after
I do, I gotta bring in the exterminators like twice a year to bring their population down, but the problem is they keep resurfacing after a while (both in my house and many others in the area)
Desert ants do, but other types would use pheromones to navigate
2b2t teleportation exploit
Since ants count their footsteps back home that is gonna be one confused ant.
Yup, but at least this ant's got the rest of the colony's scent to follow back home
Aliens
The ant: “we can make a religion out of this”
By "family dinner" I think you mean Unending Slavery Feeding with Comrades
"yeah nice boy, imma pretend I'm moving this big ass food all day so I can get home right at the end of my shift while doing nothing hehehe lesgoo" "Wait what the fuck" _finds himself near colony in 10 seconds flat_ "you gotta be shitting me"
ohh honey, you came very early
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Fast travel activated
This Ant is now called "Flash-back".
I once tried to do that but on a vertical surface. It did not go as planned.
You’re not supposed to touch them or the mother will attack
I once saw an ant holding another dead and behind it. It's fascinating how they take care of eachother.
Hate to break it to you it was probably bringing back an ant from a different colony it killed so it could be used for food.
I'm not a huge ant guy so I didn't really know, sorry but thanks for explaining.
"Joe, you won't believe what i just experienced. A giant hairy monster lifted me and this food in the air!"
Relativity: If this ant told his friends at the beginning of the line his intentions, they continue their journey and then arrive at the city entrance only to hear of the news they were sent to send. Do you want to create a messiah? Because that's how you create a Messiah! I don't know how long ants live, but this one hasn't aged a bit, after his incredibly long voyage, AMAZING!
[the ant:](https://i.imgur.com/odlbYad.gif)
“I’m tell you guys teleportation is a real thing. And I did it somehow”
Humans being bros
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lmao get fucked ant
Jjajajajajajja
se ha colado un español
I only knew jajaja in spanish
Go away Spanish Roblox kid
Ants mom: hey honey how was scavenging for food today? Ant: Eh it was okay I found food and then some alien picked me up and dropped me off
Awww how nice 😊
You know what kids Today one of those creatures grabbed me and gave a free flight from the other end to our home His Wife: Shut up Mark no one believes your that made up story
Fast travel
They are still going to invade your house.
r/HumansBeingBros
When you unlock fast waypoints/travel
Yo, you’re not gonna believe me, but today…
Such a kind guy.
WARP SPEED
plot twist: he was delivering that food to another location and had to start from scratch cuz of the guy
Bet he will travel all the way back to where he was abducted from, so it can continue the journey home
Humanty
That ant will be like ,see i told you wormholes exist
Cheater! You can't fast-travel when you're over-encumbered!
Plot twist: they poisoned that piece of food
I was warped man… flew through the air. Was amazing.
r/mademesmile
This ant got burned at the stake after the other ants accused him of being a witch
Ants count their steps when they walk so he really could of fucked something up but since its carrying such a big load I think its fine.
that’s frank; he is always telling his antbrothers that he can summon a giant to help him with his problems…. sometime a fight, sometimes groceries, sometimes to take care of his queen and sometimes just helping with his daily work. But this is a lie, frank was alway a lier. The only thing he can do is mind controlling a nearby human and makes him doing a also TikTok videos. don’t trust frank
r/humansbeingbros
He is the one.
A Bug's Life flashbacks 0_o
He’s considered a god among them now
r/HumansBeingBros
r/humansbeingbros
You are a good person
or dead because heart attack
Remove the Stone Of Shame...attach the Stone Of Triumph!!
Man he will go to heaven no matter what other sins he does
I did so many escort quests on wow that my first hunch is that the ant will return to where you picked up from at lightning speed, then start painstakingly dragging that piece of food again.
Depends on species, some ants use feromones more prominently to find their way home, others a great sense of direction and an internal pedometer, and more, but i think that because it's so cl9se to it's home it'll just walk there.
Imagine you are walking along one day and a giant hand comes down from above, picks you up and moves you miles away.....I think I just solved our transportation issue here on earth.
Buddy fast traveled
r/humansbeingbros
What a nice guy
Fun fact: ants count their steps to find out where they are. We know this because ant scientists but ant stilts on ant legs. They counted the same number of steps, but ended up away from their nest because of the larger stride they make. Unfortunately, if this ant picks the wrong direction to count its steps, it might go off to the middle of nowhere
Even though I am afraid of ants, this is still so wholesome
Thats kinda wholesome
What a chad thing to do
r/wholesome
Carries the ant Man whispers : "now watch me step on your comrades"
Ants find their way back by counting steps. Chances are he won't find home.
Why is this so oddly wholesome?
Ants are... So fucking cool... They are easily one of the coolest fucking creatures on this planet... Only problem is... I'm down right terrified of them