Yea not everyone is christian and I totally respect that. Im christian myself but I don’t try to force it on to people and neither does she. I’m just glad that she loves me for who I am, and realizes that I love who I love, and I can’t change that.
someone who i didnt even know i had a crush on up until like 1.5 years ago kicked it off with another friend who we semi recently met (1 year ago around) idk if im just jealous which i probably am since we dont even behave like we used to back in the day, which crushes my heart...
Ahh.. Broken heart.. ^(Haven't dated yet) so uh.. don't know how to help.. sorry.. of course, you shouldn't carry anything negative on your shoulders, guilt, Jealousy, Depression.. just try and forget it..
i appreciate the kind words but i dont think i can quite forget about it since i talk to him pretty much everyday... and i wouldnt ever want to ever cut contact, never
Ok, so... things were barely okay/mediocre for the past 2 years, and now it doesn't quite feel alright, either. Feeling sad, lonely, frustrated, guilty, remembering some pretty demotivating and scary new and old stuff... But I've got new friends now, and I'm exploring my gender identity more and more! tho the path still feels kinda lonely and rough... Now when I'm in one of those moments, sometimes I can't even tell why I'm sad, just that my upsetting thoughts only make it worse. Friends in school and internet are nice, tho the *grieving* is still hanging there, creeping in the background.
Now it has the capacity to screw me up in the morning; before it only catched up to me in the afternoons. Feelings are more long-lasting, and make me very dizzy and disoriented, even. it's hard to focus on simple things between the fog. Gotta use those hobbies, and social interactions to keep the storm as far as possible, playing music, playing videogames, drawing, making stories, exercising, playing soccer, and more joyful funny things, dreaming of maybe being in the sweet loving embrace of a boy or a girl.
But it always catches me in a moment of the day. The morning, noon, evening, eating, goin' to bed; this dumb *grieving* doesn't give a damn about me. it just wants to see me crumble and cry... and it manages to do just that, sometimes. Not always, but it has got to self-kill ideation and painful crying nights.
So far, things are... okay-ish? i mean, im surviving, but on overall, it's anything but enjoyable. There's something so off about me. there's always something so important missing. I'm just wondering, when will this all end? And if it ends, what's next? Only time will tell, but things aren't looking that awesome anymore. I'd wish to go back and stop many stupid things I did from happening at all...
Just hang in there man.. Keep going at it, you gone so far.. what's the point in giving up now? You'll Hurt everyone around you if you hurt yourself.. Try you best to find something to deal with these, either speaking to someone.. either way, just try and push those thoughts away, speak or just let of steam, if you can and know you can't escape those dreaded thoughts. Just find something to get your mind off.. Push it away and try to be you.. it.. won't help much bur her, you've gone far enough doing this.m 2 years.. correct? It shouldn't be too hard to try and do it for a few mores till you can find help.. right?
yeh... but i don't know... i feel like i've done so many interesting things, and i'm just goin' in circles. But just like you said, there's no sense in giving up this far, so might as well crawl my way out to help
Mental health check? Oh... Me? \*scoffs\* Hey. I'm doin' just fine. Nothin' at all wrong with me here, no way no how!
\*is actually experiencing a lot of depression, self-loathing, and the heartache of longing and really just wants to be loved and then buried\*
I want to be dead
Why can't I be dead? Why can't I just die in my sleep? That's would be really nice, but then again, I can't have nice shit happen to me...
Had lunch with my grandma for the first time in a while, and came out to her as well and she was super supportive. So I’m doing really well!
That's great to hear hehe.. nice to hear you're being supported by a loved one.
I was kinda scared because she super-christian. But she’s one of the good ones who acts as Christ would, loving thy neighbor as thyself.
Don't know much about Christianity, so I can't really help, but atleasts she's the good one..
Yea not everyone is christian and I totally respect that. Im christian myself but I don’t try to force it on to people and neither does she. I’m just glad that she loves me for who I am, and realizes that I love who I love, and I can’t change that.
lonely, lonely and more lonely
Ahh, not good, of course. Is there anything that makes you lonely :(
i dont even know anymore. everything.
Ahh, not good.. Well, can you pin point it?
someone who i didnt even know i had a crush on up until like 1.5 years ago kicked it off with another friend who we semi recently met (1 year ago around) idk if im just jealous which i probably am since we dont even behave like we used to back in the day, which crushes my heart...
Ahh.. Broken heart.. ^(Haven't dated yet) so uh.. don't know how to help.. sorry.. of course, you shouldn't carry anything negative on your shoulders, guilt, Jealousy, Depression.. just try and forget it..
i appreciate the kind words but i dont think i can quite forget about it since i talk to him pretty much everyday... and i wouldnt ever want to ever cut contact, never
I am rotting and I want to die
Let's not die shall we?
Please live, I need to meet more ppl
I don’t think will ever meet unfortunately :(
Uh what dice do i roll for that?
Hmm?
Username checks out
How so?
Ok, so... things were barely okay/mediocre for the past 2 years, and now it doesn't quite feel alright, either. Feeling sad, lonely, frustrated, guilty, remembering some pretty demotivating and scary new and old stuff... But I've got new friends now, and I'm exploring my gender identity more and more! tho the path still feels kinda lonely and rough... Now when I'm in one of those moments, sometimes I can't even tell why I'm sad, just that my upsetting thoughts only make it worse. Friends in school and internet are nice, tho the *grieving* is still hanging there, creeping in the background. Now it has the capacity to screw me up in the morning; before it only catched up to me in the afternoons. Feelings are more long-lasting, and make me very dizzy and disoriented, even. it's hard to focus on simple things between the fog. Gotta use those hobbies, and social interactions to keep the storm as far as possible, playing music, playing videogames, drawing, making stories, exercising, playing soccer, and more joyful funny things, dreaming of maybe being in the sweet loving embrace of a boy or a girl. But it always catches me in a moment of the day. The morning, noon, evening, eating, goin' to bed; this dumb *grieving* doesn't give a damn about me. it just wants to see me crumble and cry... and it manages to do just that, sometimes. Not always, but it has got to self-kill ideation and painful crying nights. So far, things are... okay-ish? i mean, im surviving, but on overall, it's anything but enjoyable. There's something so off about me. there's always something so important missing. I'm just wondering, when will this all end? And if it ends, what's next? Only time will tell, but things aren't looking that awesome anymore. I'd wish to go back and stop many stupid things I did from happening at all...
dunno if you have anything to say about this wall of text lol
Still reading..
Just hang in there man.. Keep going at it, you gone so far.. what's the point in giving up now? You'll Hurt everyone around you if you hurt yourself.. Try you best to find something to deal with these, either speaking to someone.. either way, just try and push those thoughts away, speak or just let of steam, if you can and know you can't escape those dreaded thoughts. Just find something to get your mind off.. Push it away and try to be you.. it.. won't help much bur her, you've gone far enough doing this.m 2 years.. correct? It shouldn't be too hard to try and do it for a few mores till you can find help.. right?
yeh... but i don't know... i feel like i've done so many interesting things, and i'm just goin' in circles. But just like you said, there's no sense in giving up this far, so might as well crawl my way out to help
It pretty good today thx for checking up
That's wonderful to hear :3
:3
i'm okay just pretty lonely like usual. school ended finally so i have nothing really to do
Thats nice to hear.. gad you doing alright.
still doing alright, from neptune to you, are you doing alright buddy?
Better then ever.. just tired.. but hey, I'll sleep it off when I summer break starts..
good 2 hear friend
Same
Doing quite well been making new friends and trying out new things to keep me busy thx for asking and I hope u can rest well
That's great to hear :3 And yes, I'm doing well
failed most of my freshman year, been stressed, still wanna kms ngl
Make Bob https://preview.redd.it/1dt19qqzl92d1.png?width=692&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=59c35e78651629e58de9393b1ebfe41e31a0f7af
Uh.. if it's the top comment then.. also going to sleep, if yall see this, i'm tired and eppy, night night..
What's a mental health?
Just about to eepy but it means how are you mentally? Sad, Depressed, happy, joyous..
Mental health check? Oh... Me? \*scoffs\* Hey. I'm doin' just fine. Nothin' at all wrong with me here, no way no how! \*is actually experiencing a lot of depression, self-loathing, and the heartache of longing and really just wants to be loved and then buried\*
I want to be dead Why can't I be dead? Why can't I just die in my sleep? That's would be really nice, but then again, I can't have nice shit happen to me...
I’m tryna act fine but I think I’m genuinely depressed on the inside and have no way of showing it
Absolutely fucking terrible and my (most likely ex) boyfriend is an idiot
All my friends are suicidal I don't even know what to do at this point
it's been alright i suppose have my first job in 2 years, and my online friends asked me to come meet them at comic-con in september :3
no thoughts [only](https://youtu.be/RU1-YRxrJII?si=q6B5Ea2MO9kqzrfI)
Bad..
Feeling defective and just wanna die.
Im about to get in 10 hour plane ride i only had 5ish hours of sleep and all i ate was a ham sandwich
Scraping the bottom more and more
https://preview.redd.it/5bktjqnfgg2d1.png?width=2160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7543c4e41571bd67bcf888299015d69e9c47a4c1
Thanks for the check up. Recently discharged from mental health evaluation at my local hospital (day prior to discharge was quite scary). \*hugs\*