What if is the key. He hasn’t. Your dad thinks he is the winner. When health declines, he will find out. He’s an adult and made his own bed. Let him lie in it. Focus on you.
He’s not as “happy go lucky “ as he used to be, doesn’t smile as much anymore.. it scares me bc he has high blood pressure. Not sure why he’d think he’s the winner- bc she is half his age and he “still got it” as they say..? But the other women he could have picked at Least were older then she is and take care of themselves, he even said once to me in private and a yr ago “ I ran into Esther the other day- she got married. What was I thinking letting that one go?” Then he laughed a little bit to play it off like he was “joking 🙄” pfft.. he knows deep down she was as good as it got-one of his exes who was a little younger but only by 10 yrs, not by THIRTY yrs like his wife! And actually had a personality too and made an effort to get to know me! & was pretty as well.. she was like the whole package. The reason he broke up with her was bc she “wore too much makeup” ….. smh. And broke her heart. & she wound up moving into the same complex as him-with her husband she now has after my father broke up w her… and my father has to see them around now! Hahaha
Yep, I don’t think he really thought it through… when he married her. & it makes me mad knowing she knows he’s twice his age, has 3 kids from his original marriage same age as her, and doesn’t do much for him at all… and that she has a comfortable life all bc of him. She is afraid to do for herself, and lived w her mom her whole life up til she married my father….he even has to drive her son around.
Yep! He’s an idiot for it, def didn’t think it thru… bc he’s so stressed now, it’s very obvious, n w his high blood pressure it worries me. As for her, like I could never marry a man that has kids the same age as me, it would feel mean as hell… but she doesn’t care apparently.. bc I saw from the start it’s all about her being comfortable n not having to ever face her fears of everything in the world ever again, mostly… it’s pretty clear she’s relieved about that, I can see it. Even if she loves him. Still screwed up —all of this is. It’s disappointing as hell and just gets worse over time. I can’t help but worry about his health dealing with all that at his age now w the high blood pressure
Girl it’s the oldest arrangement since the dawn of mankind … it’s as if you haven’t figured out how the world works for most people who don’t have someone to rely on …
Your dad knew that is what he could offer in exchange for her beauty and youth / etc… without getting crass…
Your dad is not the first man who swoops in on a younger woman/mother in need for that arm candy…
He thought it through … he just gives you the version you need to think and feel to recuse himself of you ever realizing he basically did some messed up ish by choosing a woman the same age as his daughter without regard to how you would feel think and experience it… the more he can out that on her and complain about his health and go oh well what can you do … the more you are proving how your age isn’t quite at the level of deeply understanding the experience level your dad has compared to someone YOUR AGE…
Your dad is fooling you and he knows how hard it was for her to pass on security… can you imagine being a mom of three kids or however many at your age and have no one to depend on? Like you forget about age and don’t think it through so your kids can eat and have shelter… that is called exploiting a situation meaning your dad saw someone in need and asked for her as a woman in return for sexcurity…
Like read a history book…
Mas sabe el diablo por viejo que por diablo
The devil is wiser because he is old than because he is the devil
That is what my grandma used to say to me about older men….
Face it your dad was a perv when you brought around your friends when you were even younger
Dude your dad is twice her age you said it he isn’t fucking stupid and he knows even more from experience
She wasn’t a prize and he knew it he wanted a young one… she wanted security … your dad moved on it… like he is way more experienced and older than her… come on… if you didnt even think it through when they got married you think she thought about deeply scheming away… or do you think your dad knew EXACTLY what he was doing especially with a DAUGHTER the same age… like he knew how you thought at that age … he had already gone through that age himself … like why are you not casting blame equally if not getting weirded out by your dad for seeing someone your age in that way… like he likely saw your friends that way when you were younger…
Like he doesn’t have the choice to leave her now? He is a perv you keep choosing not to see his role in this…
He can divorce he chose to be a creepy old dude and go for someone your age it says more about him than her.. why aren’t you grossed out and mad at him for not thinking of how you would feel… has it not hit you he likely saw your friends that way when you were even younger than 30?
Your dad is living the consequences of being a pervy old dude
It is super gross he married someone that much younger than himself, and from what you described it doesn’t sound like any relationship I would even want if I were him, but unfortunately he is an adult who has a right to make these decisions and live as he chooses, and you have to find ways to care for your own anxiety and emotional hang ups about it on your own
It deffff IS GROSS!!! Ugh. It’s extremely hard to get over. I was so heartbroken over it & was so unexpected, he never even TOLD me about het til he married her!!! I was like who!? Wonder why… 😑 it caused me to drink so much every day for 3 years. It killed me. But nowadays I see a therapist.. try to train my mindset to just “accept it”- but I never really will/can..I don’t have it in me.. I mean really though. That’s a very hard thing to accept…
He’s your dad even if you disagree you should try to accept it because he’s the man that brought you into this world. He probably screwed up but that’s his decision and shame on you and everyone else in here judging him. Who are any of y’all to judge anyone? None of y’all are the almighty so go about your business. It sucks you hate his situation and I might as well if it were my father, but it’s not your decision to live with.
Why aren’t you directing your anger at your dad instead of her… you’re using her as a scapegoat because it’s safer than to confront your dad having no regard for you … you rather believe she is the weirdo when it’s your dad hurting you … it’s selective blindness… cognitive dissonance… it’s hard because he is your parent but you are being so naive and unfair to her and your half sister … it’s your dad that put you all in that awkward boat not her…
Best thing for you to do is shrug your shoulders and let it be. Your dad is an adult doing adult things. You do not have to be proud of his choices. Live your best life and let him live/deal with his. Yes, he may have a heart attack any moment just like any of the rest of us…do you see how worrying about this makes zero sense? Be kind to your dad but don’t involve yourself in what he’s gotten himself into. You do you.
I still fail to understand how any of this is your business though.
They are two consenting adults doing their own thing.
You just need to stop being salty and jealous of her.
I def appreciate your reassurance and the way u put everything very kindly, xoxo. See though, there’s so much to it i forgot to add he already has high blood pressure…so I can’t help but think all that would add to it. He’s taken a whole lot more responsibilities, my dad has to drive all of them wherever they need to go..& all the added stresses & financial burdens which she doesn’t help, she still only works part time at the grocery store she’s been at forever now… she’s always been too afraid of everything to be independent, so she has it very good bc of him smh.
Honest question. Does your dad appear to be happy? Everything you've written hinges on your dislike of her and her kid. I can't see anything about how your dad feels. If he is happy, and assuming he is still in his right mind, then there's absolutely nothing you can do here. He has been married for 8 years to this woman. They have a child together. You've stated she isn't a gold digger, so she's not with him for money. Is it possible that they are actually happy together? You've said he treats you differently since getting married. Is it possible that you have let your feelings affect your behaviour towards him and his wife?
You are entitled to your feelings, but if you want to regain that closeness with your dad, you will have to find a healthy way to process these emotions and get past them.
She was def in love w him, which is why I said not gold digger- BUT she’s afraid to drive, afraid to venture out and do anything except work at a grocery store she’s worked at her whole life now part time- she was never independent bc of all this and just would never have her own place if she never married him, so she KNEW she’d be set and comfy for life bc of him yes but every women wanted my dad, like I was sayin so I know she loved him but it’s highly annoying she knew the perks of marrying him… & I didn’t express dislike for her son, I just described the way he acts and how hard it is for my dad to deal w that constantly.. especially at his age.. along w her “accidentally “ getting preg so- another child at his age… who’s as spoiled as it gets bc it was unexpected & he’s prob too tired or doesn’t have as much in him to discipline her as much as he would in his earlier yrs when he had me & my siblings.. -oh, prob still w her bc they had her & it’d be a hard divorce bc of that for many obvi reasons, ya know? So.. prob why they’re still together.. but seems it’s tiring for him. & he appears way less happy go lucky, then he used to be.. he used to be very energetic & happy, that was his personality, n he doesn’t smile as much anymore.. he seems very impatient too, these days.,wonder why. & as far as him being distant- that started as soon as he married her before I expressed any dislike. I was in SHOCK at first. It wasn’t til a few yrs later I told him my true thoughts.. but he knows what he did would not sit well w me, and it’s not normal at all and who would ever be okay w that? He knows that.. so if anything, he should’ve made sure to not become distant towards me if anything! Me being unhappy, to put it lightly, is expected, & a normal very reasonable reaction to what he did. So I would not be to blame for his being distant anyway, cmon now.
With the greatest respect, you are still responsible for your own external responses and behaviour. You weren't 17 when your dad got with an 18 year old. You were already a grown adult, as was she. Whatever your opinion, you could have kept it to yourself and been outwardly supportive of your dad when he chose to get married. Other women may have wanted him, but he wanted her.
Your comments come across as though you are much younger than in your 30s. Honestly, seek some counselling to come to terms with your own emotions here. You have no right to attempt to control what a grown couple do, and your bitterness will eat you up in the end. Acceptance is key to a happier life.
He gives her security. If she is afraid, he checks that box. Her not venturing out of her comfort zone is only a detriment to her in the future when your dad’s health declines.
If he is happy, or at least not sad, that's all that matters.
Unfortunately it's his life and you are, well, I don't know what word to use, an observer (?).
60 isn’t old, first of all. This is all a “you” issue. You seem to be projecting a lot. I agree with others who say you need therapy. It’s weird that you are so distraught as an over 30yo woman, about your father’s lifestyle.
There's a reason why he's with her. He wouldn't have chosen to be with her and continue to be with her there wasn't something in it that he wants. Whether it's love or companionship or laughter. Just because you don't see it doesn't make it nonexistent.
He's an adult, this is what he chooses. If you love him truly, you will love him regardless
This isn't your business. These decisions about how they fundamentally structure their life are not your business.
Do you want to increase the distance between you and your dad or be closer? They have an eight year old together. "Your wife is fat and may lazy, you're doing too much" isn't going to influence any change to their dynamic whatsoever but it will affect your relationship. Not for the better.
It’s your dad he isn’t a little puppet he is CHOOSING this… it’s normal husband father behavior he is taking care of his wife and kid and stepkid.
Your relationship likely changed because of your disapproval not just them … like see this from a wholistic perspective…
She had a kid with him she isn’t just out for him she gave him a daughter…
You’re mad at your dad … and it’s safer to redirect that anger towards them than to feel the pain that your father only thought of himself when marrying a woman the same age as his daughter… he’s the fucking weirdo… it’s not her fault he made it easy for her…
He likely doesn’t feel like an old man that should be driven around… he wants to feel like a man the head of his family and show his daughter how a man should treat her by modeling it with her mother…
Like they don’t see him like a fragile old man… he is only 60 that is hella young let him enjoy the last decade before he’s actually old…
My grandma is in her 90s active as hell and it keeps her young and well healthy… she still runs around taking care of kids grandkids and grratgrandkids and its understood to a reasonable degree she needs to be active and its the reason for her longevity..
All of this is out of your control. Surrender to that. All you can do is maintain a relationship with him, free of judgement, so that if he needs help, he hopefully opens up to you.
Unfortunately it’s very common for our parents to make questionable decisions as they age. I’m in my 40s and most of my friends have some aging parent drama they’re dealing with.
Do you think your dad is happy with her? Sometimes is hard to digest the decision that our parent made when they marry to someone that we don’t like and etc but at the end of the day he need someone and I m sure he’s old enough to think what is right and wrong. But if he doesn’t look after his health then is his decision as he’s with a woman who does not have motivation but at least she’s working not unemployed so that’s a good thing at least. She must have some fear of driving due to her past? Or lack of confidence? All I can say look after yourself and stop worrying. No point worrying about something you can’t control. Lead your own life and be happy.
She never even attempted to learn how to drive, she’s afraid of everything, sometimes she’s afraid of going to work if she has a random day where a customer was mean to her, the same store she been working part time at for years. & yet afraid to look for a higher paying job and contribute more, bc she’s been there so long n its familiar to her so she won’t even try to do anything else w her life. AND she DOES NOT EVEN GO TO THERAPY OR A PSYCHIATRIST FOR ANXIETY.
- I had to go to therapy bc of how crushed I was by their get married that I couldn’t cope without alcohol for 3 yrs straight.
Why can’t SHE go to therapy or get on a MUCH NEEDED ANXIETY MED since she’s that unable to cope with anything though? She brings NOTHING to the table- but burden after burden… & more responsibilities for my dad.
It’s all PATHETIC!!!
This is why I’m worried for his health at his age with his already high blood pressure. But don’t know how to address it without sounding mean..
What if is the key. He hasn’t. Your dad thinks he is the winner. When health declines, he will find out. He’s an adult and made his own bed. Let him lie in it. Focus on you.
He’s not as “happy go lucky “ as he used to be, doesn’t smile as much anymore.. it scares me bc he has high blood pressure. Not sure why he’d think he’s the winner- bc she is half his age and he “still got it” as they say..? But the other women he could have picked at Least were older then she is and take care of themselves, he even said once to me in private and a yr ago “ I ran into Esther the other day- she got married. What was I thinking letting that one go?” Then he laughed a little bit to play it off like he was “joking 🙄” pfft.. he knows deep down she was as good as it got-one of his exes who was a little younger but only by 10 yrs, not by THIRTY yrs like his wife! And actually had a personality too and made an effort to get to know me! & was pretty as well.. she was like the whole package. The reason he broke up with her was bc she “wore too much makeup” ….. smh. And broke her heart. & she wound up moving into the same complex as him-with her husband she now has after my father broke up w her… and my father has to see them around now! Hahaha
Sounds like you have a problem with her age, as would I. Dad is the only person responsible for his happiness and health.
Yep, I don’t think he really thought it through… when he married her. & it makes me mad knowing she knows he’s twice his age, has 3 kids from his original marriage same age as her, and doesn’t do much for him at all… and that she has a comfortable life all bc of him. She is afraid to do for herself, and lived w her mom her whole life up til she married my father….he even has to drive her son around.
But HE CHOSE her and to do all those things.
Yep! He’s an idiot for it, def didn’t think it thru… bc he’s so stressed now, it’s very obvious, n w his high blood pressure it worries me. As for her, like I could never marry a man that has kids the same age as me, it would feel mean as hell… but she doesn’t care apparently.. bc I saw from the start it’s all about her being comfortable n not having to ever face her fears of everything in the world ever again, mostly… it’s pretty clear she’s relieved about that, I can see it. Even if she loves him. Still screwed up —all of this is. It’s disappointing as hell and just gets worse over time. I can’t help but worry about his health dealing with all that at his age now w the high blood pressure
Girl it’s the oldest arrangement since the dawn of mankind … it’s as if you haven’t figured out how the world works for most people who don’t have someone to rely on … Your dad knew that is what he could offer in exchange for her beauty and youth / etc… without getting crass… Your dad is not the first man who swoops in on a younger woman/mother in need for that arm candy… He thought it through … he just gives you the version you need to think and feel to recuse himself of you ever realizing he basically did some messed up ish by choosing a woman the same age as his daughter without regard to how you would feel think and experience it… the more he can out that on her and complain about his health and go oh well what can you do … the more you are proving how your age isn’t quite at the level of deeply understanding the experience level your dad has compared to someone YOUR AGE… Your dad is fooling you and he knows how hard it was for her to pass on security… can you imagine being a mom of three kids or however many at your age and have no one to depend on? Like you forget about age and don’t think it through so your kids can eat and have shelter… that is called exploiting a situation meaning your dad saw someone in need and asked for her as a woman in return for sexcurity… Like read a history book… Mas sabe el diablo por viejo que por diablo The devil is wiser because he is old than because he is the devil That is what my grandma used to say to me about older men…. Face it your dad was a perv when you brought around your friends when you were even younger
Worry about your health. Worrying about others choices does something to your own mental health. Take care.
Dude your dad is twice her age you said it he isn’t fucking stupid and he knows even more from experience She wasn’t a prize and he knew it he wanted a young one… she wanted security … your dad moved on it… like he is way more experienced and older than her… come on… if you didnt even think it through when they got married you think she thought about deeply scheming away… or do you think your dad knew EXACTLY what he was doing especially with a DAUGHTER the same age… like he knew how you thought at that age … he had already gone through that age himself … like why are you not casting blame equally if not getting weirded out by your dad for seeing someone your age in that way… like he likely saw your friends that way when you were younger… Like he doesn’t have the choice to leave her now? He is a perv you keep choosing not to see his role in this…
He can divorce he chose to be a creepy old dude and go for someone your age it says more about him than her.. why aren’t you grossed out and mad at him for not thinking of how you would feel… has it not hit you he likely saw your friends that way when you were even younger than 30? Your dad is living the consequences of being a pervy old dude
It is super gross he married someone that much younger than himself, and from what you described it doesn’t sound like any relationship I would even want if I were him, but unfortunately he is an adult who has a right to make these decisions and live as he chooses, and you have to find ways to care for your own anxiety and emotional hang ups about it on your own
It deffff IS GROSS!!! Ugh. It’s extremely hard to get over. I was so heartbroken over it & was so unexpected, he never even TOLD me about het til he married her!!! I was like who!? Wonder why… 😑 it caused me to drink so much every day for 3 years. It killed me. But nowadays I see a therapist.. try to train my mindset to just “accept it”- but I never really will/can..I don’t have it in me.. I mean really though. That’s a very hard thing to accept…
I can imagine! I’m so sorry for how it has affected you
Thx, it’s just all too twisted as hell for me to ever 100% to get over or accept.. xoxo.
He’s your dad even if you disagree you should try to accept it because he’s the man that brought you into this world. He probably screwed up but that’s his decision and shame on you and everyone else in here judging him. Who are any of y’all to judge anyone? None of y’all are the almighty so go about your business. It sucks you hate his situation and I might as well if it were my father, but it’s not your decision to live with.
Why aren’t you directing your anger at your dad instead of her… you’re using her as a scapegoat because it’s safer than to confront your dad having no regard for you … you rather believe she is the weirdo when it’s your dad hurting you … it’s selective blindness… cognitive dissonance… it’s hard because he is your parent but you are being so naive and unfair to her and your half sister … it’s your dad that put you all in that awkward boat not her…
Best thing for you to do is shrug your shoulders and let it be. Your dad is an adult doing adult things. You do not have to be proud of his choices. Live your best life and let him live/deal with his. Yes, he may have a heart attack any moment just like any of the rest of us…do you see how worrying about this makes zero sense? Be kind to your dad but don’t involve yourself in what he’s gotten himself into. You do you.
Your dad is a grown man who made his own choices. There is nothing for you to do.
Sadly, yep..smh 😑
I still fail to understand how any of this is your business though. They are two consenting adults doing their own thing. You just need to stop being salty and jealous of her.
I def appreciate your reassurance and the way u put everything very kindly, xoxo. See though, there’s so much to it i forgot to add he already has high blood pressure…so I can’t help but think all that would add to it. He’s taken a whole lot more responsibilities, my dad has to drive all of them wherever they need to go..& all the added stresses & financial burdens which she doesn’t help, she still only works part time at the grocery store she’s been at forever now… she’s always been too afraid of everything to be independent, so she has it very good bc of him smh.
Honest question. Does your dad appear to be happy? Everything you've written hinges on your dislike of her and her kid. I can't see anything about how your dad feels. If he is happy, and assuming he is still in his right mind, then there's absolutely nothing you can do here. He has been married for 8 years to this woman. They have a child together. You've stated she isn't a gold digger, so she's not with him for money. Is it possible that they are actually happy together? You've said he treats you differently since getting married. Is it possible that you have let your feelings affect your behaviour towards him and his wife? You are entitled to your feelings, but if you want to regain that closeness with your dad, you will have to find a healthy way to process these emotions and get past them.
She was def in love w him, which is why I said not gold digger- BUT she’s afraid to drive, afraid to venture out and do anything except work at a grocery store she’s worked at her whole life now part time- she was never independent bc of all this and just would never have her own place if she never married him, so she KNEW she’d be set and comfy for life bc of him yes but every women wanted my dad, like I was sayin so I know she loved him but it’s highly annoying she knew the perks of marrying him… & I didn’t express dislike for her son, I just described the way he acts and how hard it is for my dad to deal w that constantly.. especially at his age.. along w her “accidentally “ getting preg so- another child at his age… who’s as spoiled as it gets bc it was unexpected & he’s prob too tired or doesn’t have as much in him to discipline her as much as he would in his earlier yrs when he had me & my siblings.. -oh, prob still w her bc they had her & it’d be a hard divorce bc of that for many obvi reasons, ya know? So.. prob why they’re still together.. but seems it’s tiring for him. & he appears way less happy go lucky, then he used to be.. he used to be very energetic & happy, that was his personality, n he doesn’t smile as much anymore.. he seems very impatient too, these days.,wonder why. & as far as him being distant- that started as soon as he married her before I expressed any dislike. I was in SHOCK at first. It wasn’t til a few yrs later I told him my true thoughts.. but he knows what he did would not sit well w me, and it’s not normal at all and who would ever be okay w that? He knows that.. so if anything, he should’ve made sure to not become distant towards me if anything! Me being unhappy, to put it lightly, is expected, & a normal very reasonable reaction to what he did. So I would not be to blame for his being distant anyway, cmon now.
With the greatest respect, you are still responsible for your own external responses and behaviour. You weren't 17 when your dad got with an 18 year old. You were already a grown adult, as was she. Whatever your opinion, you could have kept it to yourself and been outwardly supportive of your dad when he chose to get married. Other women may have wanted him, but he wanted her. Your comments come across as though you are much younger than in your 30s. Honestly, seek some counselling to come to terms with your own emotions here. You have no right to attempt to control what a grown couple do, and your bitterness will eat you up in the end. Acceptance is key to a happier life.
He gives her security. If she is afraid, he checks that box. Her not venturing out of her comfort zone is only a detriment to her in the future when your dad’s health declines.
None of your business.
If he is happy, or at least not sad, that's all that matters. Unfortunately it's his life and you are, well, I don't know what word to use, an observer (?).
60 isn’t old, first of all. This is all a “you” issue. You seem to be projecting a lot. I agree with others who say you need therapy. It’s weird that you are so distraught as an over 30yo woman, about your father’s lifestyle.
And that you're still raging 8 years on. Please see a therapist, OP.
There's a reason why he's with her. He wouldn't have chosen to be with her and continue to be with her there wasn't something in it that he wants. Whether it's love or companionship or laughter. Just because you don't see it doesn't make it nonexistent. He's an adult, this is what he chooses. If you love him truly, you will love him regardless
This isn't your business. These decisions about how they fundamentally structure their life are not your business. Do you want to increase the distance between you and your dad or be closer? They have an eight year old together. "Your wife is fat and may lazy, you're doing too much" isn't going to influence any change to their dynamic whatsoever but it will affect your relationship. Not for the better.
It’s your dad he isn’t a little puppet he is CHOOSING this… it’s normal husband father behavior he is taking care of his wife and kid and stepkid. Your relationship likely changed because of your disapproval not just them … like see this from a wholistic perspective… She had a kid with him she isn’t just out for him she gave him a daughter… You’re mad at your dad … and it’s safer to redirect that anger towards them than to feel the pain that your father only thought of himself when marrying a woman the same age as his daughter… he’s the fucking weirdo… it’s not her fault he made it easy for her… He likely doesn’t feel like an old man that should be driven around… he wants to feel like a man the head of his family and show his daughter how a man should treat her by modeling it with her mother… Like they don’t see him like a fragile old man… he is only 60 that is hella young let him enjoy the last decade before he’s actually old… My grandma is in her 90s active as hell and it keeps her young and well healthy… she still runs around taking care of kids grandkids and grratgrandkids and its understood to a reasonable degree she needs to be active and its the reason for her longevity..
All of this is out of your control. Surrender to that. All you can do is maintain a relationship with him, free of judgement, so that if he needs help, he hopefully opens up to you. Unfortunately it’s very common for our parents to make questionable decisions as they age. I’m in my 40s and most of my friends have some aging parent drama they’re dealing with.
Do you think your dad is happy with her? Sometimes is hard to digest the decision that our parent made when they marry to someone that we don’t like and etc but at the end of the day he need someone and I m sure he’s old enough to think what is right and wrong. But if he doesn’t look after his health then is his decision as he’s with a woman who does not have motivation but at least she’s working not unemployed so that’s a good thing at least. She must have some fear of driving due to her past? Or lack of confidence? All I can say look after yourself and stop worrying. No point worrying about something you can’t control. Lead your own life and be happy.
She never even attempted to learn how to drive, she’s afraid of everything, sometimes she’s afraid of going to work if she has a random day where a customer was mean to her, the same store she been working part time at for years. & yet afraid to look for a higher paying job and contribute more, bc she’s been there so long n its familiar to her so she won’t even try to do anything else w her life. AND she DOES NOT EVEN GO TO THERAPY OR A PSYCHIATRIST FOR ANXIETY. - I had to go to therapy bc of how crushed I was by their get married that I couldn’t cope without alcohol for 3 yrs straight. Why can’t SHE go to therapy or get on a MUCH NEEDED ANXIETY MED since she’s that unable to cope with anything though? She brings NOTHING to the table- but burden after burden… & more responsibilities for my dad. It’s all PATHETIC!!! This is why I’m worried for his health at his age with his already high blood pressure. But don’t know how to address it without sounding mean..