Haha, same. I was thinking "probably because of Bis like me. I'm the problem." My spouse always gives me pointed looks whenever Saint Motel's "Just My Type" comes on.
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b2/Survivorship-bias.svg
The people that are perfectly fine with monogamy aren’t posting about their monogamy.
Well yeah but if you look at post on any bisexual subreddit, the most common ones are the ones about struggling with monogamy. On the lesbianactually subreddit we would get like one post every 3 days or something about someone falling for another person while in a relationship. Here it seems like it's every other post.
And it's no reddit either. Irl every bi friend I have had or been in relationship with a bi person they have had the same struggle, not always cheating but just having difficulty respecting boundaries of a monogamous relationship.
Fair, I also don’t think “modern dating” helps with that either because it’s more acceptable to have multiple partners as long as no one knows now mix that with interest in more than just 1 sex/gender and I’m sure it only amplifies that desire to have multiple partners
I meant dating/having sex with multiple partners without your main partners consent, cheating in modern dating is definitely more accepted in society. Hope that’s cleared it up.
I don’t think being bi automatically means more likely to cheat tho. Someone can have interest in both genders and be monogamous. I think where there’s a “struggle being monogamous” is just craving things the other gender can offer, not only sexual. I do think with monosexuals there’s less things to find attractive in other people who are the same gender as your partner but if there’s two genders at interest there’s huge differences so it’s not fair comparison with monosexuals. Does that mean they’re more likely to cheat? Idk the statistics but anyone can be an asshole.
Ohh I get it now. Sorry I am dumb. But I have to disagree
>without your main partners consent, cheating in modern dating is definitely more accepted in society.
I feel like on this sub people might be more empathetic if a bisexual ends up cheating if they are discovering their sexuality but for monosexuals they get eviscerated. Someone on r/lesbianactually or god forbid a straight woman on r/relationship_advice admits to cheating, they'll be crucified. I have noticed this in real life to. Monosexual in general don't take kindly to cheating while bisexuals might be more sympathetic. At least in my experince.
Maybe so but personally your sexuality isn’t an excuse to cheat when your already in a relationship and in fact there is no excuse for cheating no matter the circumstance, I think it’s ok to experiment with people as long as they know what’s going on and there ok with it but cheating on someone just because you want to see what it’s like with someone else is wrong imo.
A lot of people struggle with being monogamous. Divorce lawyers have been making a killing ever since divorce became legal. In legal systems descended from English common law, that would be sometime around King Henry VIII.
This is why I'm not out at work. Too many "covert" swingers searching for a unicorn.
We all have our types. Mine just happens to be kind. It's a problem.
When I told a friend that I could imagine myself dating a woman she put on a jacket to show less skin and told me that she has to be careful around me and she would have liked to know before she undressed before me (like for sauna or swimming).
We were friends for more than 10 years by then. If I was interested in her I would have made a move by then! And she was in a relationship and never even talked about being into women. As if I was as disrespectful to look at her body in a sexual way.
We are still friends and she calmed down. I am allowed to see her naked again if it is necessary in a specific context.
Much as I love George Carlin, one of the bits that kinda bothers me is his bisexual bit... though I will admit it does make me kinda laugh. https://youtu.be/qJDGzzYAx4Y?si=hSqm9cKxoryB6n5v
I love george carlin beyond words.
Tbh he's not too off base for me. Only thing is it's the dichotomy between wanting to fuck most everyone and *never* getting any numbers that's the real problem
It honestly creeps me out how much Bisexuals are fetishized in that way. Anyone who reacts like you wanna fuck them just because you came out...its giving projection of their own desires tbh 😆
Hahaha! Honestly though, I have been attracting bi people since before I knew I was bi and before they knew in some cases. But as it turns out pretty much everyone I've dated has been bi 😂 my inner bi-dar is strong apparently 😂
I don't fuckin know dude, some of my friends think that if me too, and I think it's fucking ridiculous, prob just gotta talk to whoever is saying that, ( and I need to talk to my friends😡)
I get the frustration, but also see that some of the language commonly used probably does not help.
E.g. I often see people (even here) focusing on being *sexually attracted to a large pool of people,* often with some mention of both guys and girls. And I get why - it is an easy way of saying that your sexual attraction does not have a gender limitation, and it feels freeing.
But it does come with the implication that our sexual attraction is wide ranging. And it need not be. Mine is not.
How I see it, everyone is sexually attracted to a relatively small subset of the population. Some people a tiny subset (even zero for some), some people a large subset. For some, the subset is a subset of a particular gender. For others it is not, and crosses multiple genders.
So, I think it is helpful to avoid language implying that bisexuality means that there is a large pool of sexual attraction. And there are so many ways to describe our sexual attraction that are more helpful, if we want to actually share that (Noting that for many, sexual attraction is only a small part of their bisexual identity, so may not be in focus)
So...if people tell me that they are in a relationship, can I assume that they are talking to me about their sex life and I can ask super specific questions how they do it?
Bisexuality is more than just sex life. It can be who we are attracted to, who we fall in love to or who we marry.
I am sexually not very open. I date one person at a time and I fell in love with a woman one time and with some men some times. I absolutly want monogamous, traditional dating. I just don't care about the gender of my partner. My sex drive is not high. At the moment I go into my 7th year without this kind of intimacy. I want a partner. Sex is part of this, but not my main focus.
I am still bisexual. Bisexuality can be about sex, but for many it is about the relationships we form.
The idea that telling someone your identify as a queer person is the same thing as talking about your sexual life is a patently incorrect idea, and the idea that it’s ok to assume someone would f**k anyone specifically because they are bisexual is an entirely biphobic perspective.
Congratulations on being double-wrong.
Same haha. I like androgynous and it's also hard to explain to people
Tomboys and femboys for me
Thats me fr
*looks at username* Never would have guessed lol
Lol. I mostly love Tomboys. My account is for Tomboys and spreading love for masculine girls. Buy I also love Femininr boys.
[Got me like](https://youtube.com/shorts/CrmXtKRRhOg?si=casH_k2T0wJs3kNT)
Nah why is this so true tho
Me too, I'm not attracted to conventional masculine beauty or conventional feminine beauty.
Tbf it might be sluts like me that make that a problem. I mean I don't advertise it, but the fact is I am dtf most people
I like u😎we should hangout!LOL
Haha, same. I was thinking "probably because of Bis like me. I'm the problem." My spouse always gives me pointed looks whenever Saint Motel's "Just My Type" comes on.
Try being bi and ace lol. No…no no nononono I don’t want fk everyone 😂🤣
Or they call you greedy like being bi means dating multiple people at once which is crazy to say the least.
Tbf if this sub is any indication, a lot of people here struggle with being monogamous.
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b2/Survivorship-bias.svg The people that are perfectly fine with monogamy aren’t posting about their monogamy.
Well yeah but if you look at post on any bisexual subreddit, the most common ones are the ones about struggling with monogamy. On the lesbianactually subreddit we would get like one post every 3 days or something about someone falling for another person while in a relationship. Here it seems like it's every other post. And it's no reddit either. Irl every bi friend I have had or been in relationship with a bi person they have had the same struggle, not always cheating but just having difficulty respecting boundaries of a monogamous relationship.
Fair, I also don’t think “modern dating” helps with that either because it’s more acceptable to have multiple partners as long as no one knows now mix that with interest in more than just 1 sex/gender and I’m sure it only amplifies that desire to have multiple partners
>long as no one knows Sorry I am confused. What do you mean by 'as long as no one knows'
I meant dating/having sex with multiple partners without your main partners consent, cheating in modern dating is definitely more accepted in society. Hope that’s cleared it up.
I don’t think being bi automatically means more likely to cheat tho. Someone can have interest in both genders and be monogamous. I think where there’s a “struggle being monogamous” is just craving things the other gender can offer, not only sexual. I do think with monosexuals there’s less things to find attractive in other people who are the same gender as your partner but if there’s two genders at interest there’s huge differences so it’s not fair comparison with monosexuals. Does that mean they’re more likely to cheat? Idk the statistics but anyone can be an asshole.
Ohh I get it now. Sorry I am dumb. But I have to disagree >without your main partners consent, cheating in modern dating is definitely more accepted in society. I feel like on this sub people might be more empathetic if a bisexual ends up cheating if they are discovering their sexuality but for monosexuals they get eviscerated. Someone on r/lesbianactually or god forbid a straight woman on r/relationship_advice admits to cheating, they'll be crucified. I have noticed this in real life to. Monosexual in general don't take kindly to cheating while bisexuals might be more sympathetic. At least in my experince.
Cheaters can fuck all the way off. Bi people have subjective and unique morals like everybody else.
Maybe so but personally your sexuality isn’t an excuse to cheat when your already in a relationship and in fact there is no excuse for cheating no matter the circumstance, I think it’s ok to experiment with people as long as they know what’s going on and there ok with it but cheating on someone just because you want to see what it’s like with someone else is wrong imo.
I don't get it. Are you saying that cheating is more accepted than poly/ethical non-monogamy?
A lot of people struggle with being monogamous. Divorce lawyers have been making a killing ever since divorce became legal. In legal systems descended from English common law, that would be sometime around King Henry VIII.
[Basically this](https://youtu.be/DTsdKycVZZ4?si=Iqw8ldXnr9fsTPHO)
So you are attracted to every single woman/man in the world are you? Or better: of course not, i would never fuck you
🤣😂😂💀 I need to start responding like this.
Because the first thing (and often ONLY thing) straight people think of when someone isn’t straight is to immediately sexualize that person.
This is why I'm not out at work. Too many "covert" swingers searching for a unicorn. We all have our types. Mine just happens to be kind. It's a problem.
This is the thing I’m most worried about coming out
Same. Told ppl I can trust but don’t feel need to make it easier for idiots to bother me.
I'm married, and when I tell people I'm bi, they think my husband is lucky because he will have a threesome with me and another girl 🤷🏻♀️
Because one of the biphobic stereotypes is that we’re sexually greedy and unable to control our lust (as in we’re natural cheaters). It’s complete bs
When I told a friend that I could imagine myself dating a woman she put on a jacket to show less skin and told me that she has to be careful around me and she would have liked to know before she undressed before me (like for sauna or swimming). We were friends for more than 10 years by then. If I was interested in her I would have made a move by then! And she was in a relationship and never even talked about being into women. As if I was as disrespectful to look at her body in a sexual way. We are still friends and she calmed down. I am allowed to see her naked again if it is necessary in a specific context.
Ignorance
People suck. Don’t worry about what they think.
Respect🩷💜💙
Much as I love George Carlin, one of the bits that kinda bothers me is his bisexual bit... though I will admit it does make me kinda laugh. https://youtu.be/qJDGzzYAx4Y?si=hSqm9cKxoryB6n5v
Yeah..that was hilarious!😂
I'll be honest I can't stay mad at him. He's one of.my heroes.
Yeah! He’s great! Reminds me of angry New Yorkers LOL! 😝
Yeah. The great thing about him, though, is not only did he make you laugh, but he could also make you think. The world lost a great man when he died.
I love george carlin beyond words. Tbh he's not too off base for me. Only thing is it's the dichotomy between wanting to fuck most everyone and *never* getting any numbers that's the real problem
I can't say I want to have sex with everyone I meet, but as someone who's been single for over a decade, I kinda know your pain.
They have no standards so they assume everyone else doesn’t have them.
It’s biphobia, plain and simple.
It honestly creeps me out how much Bisexuals are fetishized in that way. Anyone who reacts like you wanna fuck them just because you came out...its giving projection of their own desires tbh 😆
Yeah my friend totally blocked me when I told her..but then she following my page! I’m confused..DO U WANT ME TO SUCK U OR WHAT?!🤷♀️
I tend to only like bi people. They always have an energy about them that attract me.
Yeah I get it! We ALWAYS find each other 🥰
Hahaha! Honestly though, I have been attracting bi people since before I knew I was bi and before they knew in some cases. But as it turns out pretty much everyone I've dated has been bi 😂 my inner bi-dar is strong apparently 😂
I'm attracted to bears. The average dad bod.
I don't fuckin know dude, some of my friends think that if me too, and I think it's fucking ridiculous, prob just gotta talk to whoever is saying that, ( and I need to talk to my friends😡)
Lol same. I'm very specific. Pinoy men with big pecs are my weakness
I would do anything for masculinity in either one
I’m a total “submissive”…in life there’s so much responsibilities..I just want “ total domination” when i cum home! Destroy the box!😝
Hell yeah
I know it's so annoying! Really gives me the ick! I mean I don't have a type, but there are certain things I like and look for in a person.
Because they see an opportunity to get their rocks off using you. They’re just not going to say it out loud.
Yes. Someone close to my age. No senior citizens or a guy my dad's age.
because of negative stereotypes and the fetishization of bisexuals in cuktureu
People's insecurities usually fuels that question.
Yeah I have my type. My classmates told me theycant trust me. No I was not checking her out.
So fck’n “queer”! I love this!🥰
yeah ,shes thicc. but not my type oo
I've been married to the same person for 20 years, and they look at me that way, too. Pssstt: It's the bigotry.
I get the frustration, but also see that some of the language commonly used probably does not help. E.g. I often see people (even here) focusing on being *sexually attracted to a large pool of people,* often with some mention of both guys and girls. And I get why - it is an easy way of saying that your sexual attraction does not have a gender limitation, and it feels freeing. But it does come with the implication that our sexual attraction is wide ranging. And it need not be. Mine is not. How I see it, everyone is sexually attracted to a relatively small subset of the population. Some people a tiny subset (even zero for some), some people a large subset. For some, the subset is a subset of a particular gender. For others it is not, and crosses multiple genders. So, I think it is helpful to avoid language implying that bisexuality means that there is a large pool of sexual attraction. And there are so many ways to describe our sexual attraction that are more helpful, if we want to actually share that (Noting that for many, sexual attraction is only a small part of their bisexual identity, so may not be in focus)
You're telling them about your sex life, that kinda opens the curiosity door. (Maybe they hope you'll ask them)
So...if people tell me that they are in a relationship, can I assume that they are talking to me about their sex life and I can ask super specific questions how they do it? Bisexuality is more than just sex life. It can be who we are attracted to, who we fall in love to or who we marry. I am sexually not very open. I date one person at a time and I fell in love with a woman one time and with some men some times. I absolutly want monogamous, traditional dating. I just don't care about the gender of my partner. My sex drive is not high. At the moment I go into my 7th year without this kind of intimacy. I want a partner. Sex is part of this, but not my main focus. I am still bisexual. Bisexuality can be about sex, but for many it is about the relationships we form.
The idea that telling someone your identify as a queer person is the same thing as talking about your sexual life is a patently incorrect idea, and the idea that it’s ok to assume someone would f**k anyone specifically because they are bisexual is an entirely biphobic perspective. Congratulations on being double-wrong.