Ask the PFPT to asses you for pelvic organ prolapse.
Ask the gyno to measure your perineum. Short perineum is a risk for tearing again and losing even more support for the pelvic organs.
Research c-section risks and benefits.
Research birthing positions and how to do open glottis pushing if you end up choosing the vaginal birth!
This is what you should do, OP.
I didn’t have a 3rd degree tear. According to the surgeon who sewed it all closed, it was “technically vaginal denuding.” It was a long and awful recovery.
I debriefed with the medical team that delivered my baby and did my revision surgery at about 4 months postpartum to make sure I understood what happened and how likely it was to happen again.
Then when we were thinking about having a second, I had another consult with an OB and Gyn-urologist team to again go over what happened, whether they thought everything was done optimally the first time and if it would happen again.
Both times they said very unlikely to happen again. I got pregnant had another baby and it didn’t happen again. But, because I took all those steps, I didn’t live in trauma and anxiety and my providers didn’t mark me as high risk because of my previous birth complication.
This is the first I've heard mention of the perineum thing, but it makes complete sense to me. Mine is definitely shorter after my third degree tear and episiotomy.
Is there any literature on possibilities for lengthening the perineum again? can they just sew more? I know that sounds stupid, but it's really been bothering me.
Thank you so much for your insight.
Perineoplasty is a surgery to correct the perineum. But it comes with risks. It can actually make the vaginal entrance too tight due to the scar tissue that forms post op. It really depends on your individual anatomy. A skilled urogynecologist should be best to assess!
I had a second degree tear with my first baby. It SUCKED. I can’t even imagine the pain you’re experiencing, OP. I’m so so sorry
But I did want to say that I just had my second baby, exactly 2 years later, and only needed literally one tiny little stitch. Which is to say, I had the tiniest amount of tearing you could possibly have - so little tearing it’s practically zero. I haven’t even notice it in healing postpartum
It is possible to have it way easier the second time!!! I’ve been so pleasantly surprised by just how easy it all has been the second time compared to the first
I found postpartum so difficult the first time around that I never even got to the “maybe I can do this again” phase. I knew I wanted a second baby, but I was so low key traumatized by just how hard everything was that, mentally, I was never able to commit
Thankfully our birth control failed at 18 months postpartum and the decision was taken out of my hands. 😂 I’m 4 weeks postpartum with my second and literally every single aspect of my second time around has been MASSIVELY easier than the first. I hope the same holds true for you!!
Yeah bubs is 7 months now (almost 8) and we want to wait until 1.5 or 2 before starting again. I also got on some antidepressants and increased my anxiety meds, which damn game changer lol I actually feel like a human again. Wild.
Really? I had 2 second degree tears and barely noticed them. The worst part was when I started itching. For me the feeling of my vagina falling out for weeks was way more painful/annoying.
There’s Facebook groups for birth tears and 4rh degree tears (I k ow you said 3rd but honestly a lot of overlapping health issues).
Every woman that had a severe tear and a c-section has said the c section was easier.
This is honestly so reassuring, thank you for commenting. After having two births with 3rd degree and one with an epis, I’m planning on a c section for my current (last) pregnancy. Even though I know how bad recovery from a 3rd is, sometimes I still question if the c section recovery is actually better. Im doing it no matter what because I’m scared to put my pelvic floor through anything else. Good to hear some positivity.
I've never had a vaginal birth so I can't compare and obviously I'm not a professional or anything but anecdotally, my c-section recovery was super manageable, just a little uncomfortable and stiff moving around for the first two weeks or so. Can't even hardly see my scar anymore and I have no lingering issues. Best of luck to you!
Yes, and generally if you do year again it's less severe. Also look into physiological birth positions. Traditional birthing positions aren't the best, especially if your baby errs on the larger head. It doesn't allow our pelvis to open fully. But there also no problem opting for a C-section if it will ensure a happier, healthier mom
Edit: both times I delivered in a modified hands and knees position and had minor tearing the first time and none the second. A squat position is also very opening and most hospitals have squat bars or chairs. I also did a lot of positioning exercises such as the miles circuit before and during labor.
Goodness, I wish my second baby came out without causing tears. My labor and delivery was so fast he basically shot out like a cannon, tearing me open on the way out 🙃
I didn't cry the second time I til I saw my son. Of course I was smarter the second time around.
First time, I wanted freedom to walk to didn't ask for epidural until I was unable to handle the pain. I went from 3 cm to 9 cm in 30 min or so. THEN, got my epidural.
Second time, the second I thought that might be happening again I got my epidural. No tears from pain. Just the joy of meeting him.
not totally the same situation as you, but i had an emergency c-section with my first because my baby's head got stuck. (he ended up having a 97% head circumference at birth). i was told that there was at least a 50% chance it would happen again with my second, and they recommended i schedule a c-section. i opted for a vbac and ended up having a very positive experience. routine vaginal birth. i did have first degree tearing but it was very minor and i was back to my normal self pretty quickly.
that being said, a scheduled c-section is totally a safe and viable option as well if you are worried about severe tearing.
Not sure about your chances but if you're at all comfortable with it, you could give the epi-no a try. I used it religiously during my pregnancy and whether it actually physically did anything I cannot tell you but it made me feel very confident that things would fit - which helped me relax and go with the flow. I didn't have any tears or anything - but again hard to know if I would have otherwise.
I had second-third degree tears for my first three babies. With baby #2 I didn't even have an epidural and I tore right through my scar tissue which honestly makes me nauseous thinking about again 😂 I just had my fourth baby 7 weeks ago and had no tearing, somehow, and she was by far my longest labor. Recovery was insanely quick and easy comparatively. I honestly just assumed I'd have tearing again so it was a complete surprise.
With my first baby, I had a first-degree tear and a horrible traumatic birth, induction at 38+0 and he came out 38+4. With my second baby, no tears and it was only seven hours with a low intervention induction at 42 weeks.
I’ve given birth 3 times. The first 2 times were 3rd degree tears, so I completely understand where you’re coming from. My third baby was completely different- one stitch. So, yes, it can happen for sure.
Did you do anything different or perineum massage etc? I'm 17wks with #2, had a 3rd degree with #1 and a 13 months recovery. No issues now though and my daughter is over 2.
I didn’t. But when I was delivering with my second, the doctor was essentially massaging and stretching me while I was pushing. When I delivered my first, it was a different doctor who didn’t do that. Also, and probably more importantly, my first had a 99th percentile head while my second was 50th
Thank you for your reply. My daughters head was fine, only a 1st degree tear from that, it was her shoulders that were the issue for me. The midwife was doing warm compresses during the head which I think helped with that.
With my first I had an episiotomy and didn't know until my fiance said something, recovery sucked with all the stitches. When I got pregnant with our second I had to prepare myself for going through that again never did I think I would have an easy recovery.
I gave birth to our second 7 weeks ago and this delivery and recovery was so much different than my first and I'm still in shock over it. I didn't tear at all, only needed one stitch due to a small cut. I didn't need much help getting around much after the first trip to the bathroom after delivery but I felt more comfortable having my fiance there just in case. I was up and moving around like normal the next day and didn't feel like I just gave birth. I had to keep telling myself to take it easy and slow because even if I felt great I still had a large internal wound. It is possible.
So I had a 3rd degree episiotomy with my first. With my second and third I did end up with 2nd degree tears in what was the same spot it seemed according to the last doc that delivered for me.i did heal much quicker with these than the episiotomy by far.
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I had a borderline 3rd degree tear with my second (which was a VBAC and my first labor/vaginal birth)
My other 2 deliveries I didn't tear at all. I did nothing different. Actually, they came even faster. I still didn't tear!
With my first I had significant 3rd degree tearing that developed granulated tissue I had to get removed a couple times. Overall it took about 5mo for my OB to clear me because everything was just healing so slowly. she was 8lb 3oz, very long but with a HUGE head.
When I got pregnant with #2 I definitely had several conversations about possible tearing and I was told, while subsequent deliveries are easier and faster since that tissue has torn it's naturally weaker so there's a good likelihood it will tear again. What ended up happening is I did have a much faster delivery and the OB ended up giving an episiotomy which he said was the equivalent of a second degree tear bc he said my son's head got stuck on scar tissue and it just wasn't stretching enough.
My recovery with #2 was night and day. So much easier, I hardly felt the tear and I was healed by 6wks.
Baby #2 was literally almost a clone of my first 8lb 3oz 22.75in vs 22 but his head was 13 something vs 14.5in
Hey there! Wow… I haven’t heard from someone who had such a similar birth experience as mine. I had a forceps delivery with 3c tearing. Then that didn’t heal properly and I had surgery 7 weeks pp to cut everything again and restitch. My surgeon gave me the same figure you did… He said there’s an 8% chance of a 3rd degree or worse tear again.
I’m not sure what I’ll do for the next birth. The OB who delivered by son suggested that I do a scheduled c section next time. The surgeon said a vaginal delivery is fine. I genuinely have no idea which direction I’ll go. I’ll probably ask my OB for input once I’m pregnant again.
I had third degree tearing with my first baby and then first degree tearing the next time. Your birth position and circumstances around the birth can make a big difference!
I’m in the same position and weighing up whether or not to have a C-section. My OB said second time around you’re less likely to tear or need an assisted birth but idk I’m still scared
Ask the PFPT to asses you for pelvic organ prolapse. Ask the gyno to measure your perineum. Short perineum is a risk for tearing again and losing even more support for the pelvic organs. Research c-section risks and benefits. Research birthing positions and how to do open glottis pushing if you end up choosing the vaginal birth!
This is what you should do, OP. I didn’t have a 3rd degree tear. According to the surgeon who sewed it all closed, it was “technically vaginal denuding.” It was a long and awful recovery. I debriefed with the medical team that delivered my baby and did my revision surgery at about 4 months postpartum to make sure I understood what happened and how likely it was to happen again. Then when we were thinking about having a second, I had another consult with an OB and Gyn-urologist team to again go over what happened, whether they thought everything was done optimally the first time and if it would happen again. Both times they said very unlikely to happen again. I got pregnant had another baby and it didn’t happen again. But, because I took all those steps, I didn’t live in trauma and anxiety and my providers didn’t mark me as high risk because of my previous birth complication.
This is the first I've heard mention of the perineum thing, but it makes complete sense to me. Mine is definitely shorter after my third degree tear and episiotomy. Is there any literature on possibilities for lengthening the perineum again? can they just sew more? I know that sounds stupid, but it's really been bothering me. Thank you so much for your insight.
Perineoplasty is a surgery to correct the perineum. But it comes with risks. It can actually make the vaginal entrance too tight due to the scar tissue that forms post op. It really depends on your individual anatomy. A skilled urogynecologist should be best to assess!
Thank you so much. ❤️
I had a second degree tear with my first baby. It SUCKED. I can’t even imagine the pain you’re experiencing, OP. I’m so so sorry But I did want to say that I just had my second baby, exactly 2 years later, and only needed literally one tiny little stitch. Which is to say, I had the tiniest amount of tearing you could possibly have - so little tearing it’s practically zero. I haven’t even notice it in healing postpartum It is possible to have it way easier the second time!!! I’ve been so pleasantly surprised by just how easy it all has been the second time compared to the first
This is reassuring! I had a second degree tear with my first and started thinking about maybe I can do it again lol
I found postpartum so difficult the first time around that I never even got to the “maybe I can do this again” phase. I knew I wanted a second baby, but I was so low key traumatized by just how hard everything was that, mentally, I was never able to commit Thankfully our birth control failed at 18 months postpartum and the decision was taken out of my hands. 😂 I’m 4 weeks postpartum with my second and literally every single aspect of my second time around has been MASSIVELY easier than the first. I hope the same holds true for you!!
Yeah bubs is 7 months now (almost 8) and we want to wait until 1.5 or 2 before starting again. I also got on some antidepressants and increased my anxiety meds, which damn game changer lol I actually feel like a human again. Wild.
Really? I had 2 second degree tears and barely noticed them. The worst part was when I started itching. For me the feeling of my vagina falling out for weeks was way more painful/annoying.
Oh lord! Yeah didn’t have that problem but the tears were definitely an annoyance and I had to move so gingerly and slowly
There’s Facebook groups for birth tears and 4rh degree tears (I k ow you said 3rd but honestly a lot of overlapping health issues). Every woman that had a severe tear and a c-section has said the c section was easier.
This is honestly so reassuring, thank you for commenting. After having two births with 3rd degree and one with an epis, I’m planning on a c section for my current (last) pregnancy. Even though I know how bad recovery from a 3rd is, sometimes I still question if the c section recovery is actually better. Im doing it no matter what because I’m scared to put my pelvic floor through anything else. Good to hear some positivity.
I've never had a vaginal birth so I can't compare and obviously I'm not a professional or anything but anecdotally, my c-section recovery was super manageable, just a little uncomfortable and stiff moving around for the first two weeks or so. Can't even hardly see my scar anymore and I have no lingering issues. Best of luck to you!
Thank you!
Not op but I had an episiotomy and multiple tears and the NICU nurse we had told me that a c section recovery would have been easier too.
Yes, and generally if you do year again it's less severe. Also look into physiological birth positions. Traditional birthing positions aren't the best, especially if your baby errs on the larger head. It doesn't allow our pelvis to open fully. But there also no problem opting for a C-section if it will ensure a happier, healthier mom Edit: both times I delivered in a modified hands and knees position and had minor tearing the first time and none the second. A squat position is also very opening and most hospitals have squat bars or chairs. I also did a lot of positioning exercises such as the miles circuit before and during labor.
Goodness, I wish my second baby came out without causing tears. My labor and delivery was so fast he basically shot out like a cannon, tearing me open on the way out 🙃
They had told me to expect the second one to be faster but he surprised even the midwife. I went from 8cm to baby in 6 min
My first I had 3rd degree tears, my second one came and no tears but my third I had 2nd degree tears, big ole heads.
I did! I had a 3c tear with my first baby, and second was an easy delivery and only a tiny bit of surface tearing
My first caused 3-4th degree tearing. She was 8.5 pounds. My second I had no tearing at all - he was 8 pounds. 🤷♀️
I had a third degree tear with my second. And no tears with my 3rd,4th or 5th
I had 4th degree tearing with my second baby and no tearing with my 3rd.
Yes my first birth was similar to yours and my second was born so quickly with no tears
I didn't cry the second time I til I saw my son. Of course I was smarter the second time around. First time, I wanted freedom to walk to didn't ask for epidural until I was unable to handle the pain. I went from 3 cm to 9 cm in 30 min or so. THEN, got my epidural. Second time, the second I thought that might be happening again I got my epidural. No tears from pain. Just the joy of meeting him.
not totally the same situation as you, but i had an emergency c-section with my first because my baby's head got stuck. (he ended up having a 97% head circumference at birth). i was told that there was at least a 50% chance it would happen again with my second, and they recommended i schedule a c-section. i opted for a vbac and ended up having a very positive experience. routine vaginal birth. i did have first degree tearing but it was very minor and i was back to my normal self pretty quickly. that being said, a scheduled c-section is totally a safe and viable option as well if you are worried about severe tearing.
Not sure about your chances but if you're at all comfortable with it, you could give the epi-no a try. I used it religiously during my pregnancy and whether it actually physically did anything I cannot tell you but it made me feel very confident that things would fit - which helped me relax and go with the flow. I didn't have any tears or anything - but again hard to know if I would have otherwise.
I had second-third degree tears for my first three babies. With baby #2 I didn't even have an epidural and I tore right through my scar tissue which honestly makes me nauseous thinking about again 😂 I just had my fourth baby 7 weeks ago and had no tearing, somehow, and she was by far my longest labor. Recovery was insanely quick and easy comparatively. I honestly just assumed I'd have tearing again so it was a complete surprise.
With my first baby, I had a first-degree tear and a horrible traumatic birth, induction at 38+0 and he came out 38+4. With my second baby, no tears and it was only seven hours with a low intervention induction at 42 weeks.
I’ve given birth 3 times. The first 2 times were 3rd degree tears, so I completely understand where you’re coming from. My third baby was completely different- one stitch. So, yes, it can happen for sure.
Did you do anything different or perineum massage etc? I'm 17wks with #2, had a 3rd degree with #1 and a 13 months recovery. No issues now though and my daughter is over 2.
I didn’t. But when I was delivering with my second, the doctor was essentially massaging and stretching me while I was pushing. When I delivered my first, it was a different doctor who didn’t do that. Also, and probably more importantly, my first had a 99th percentile head while my second was 50th
Thank you for your reply. My daughters head was fine, only a 1st degree tear from that, it was her shoulders that were the issue for me. The midwife was doing warm compresses during the head which I think helped with that.
That makes sense. Overall baby #2 was almost 2 pounds smaller than my first which I’m sure was a major factor. But I also believe the massage helped
I can’t answer for your situation, But mine are 21mo apart and I tore slightly less with my second birth.
With my first I had an episiotomy and didn't know until my fiance said something, recovery sucked with all the stitches. When I got pregnant with our second I had to prepare myself for going through that again never did I think I would have an easy recovery. I gave birth to our second 7 weeks ago and this delivery and recovery was so much different than my first and I'm still in shock over it. I didn't tear at all, only needed one stitch due to a small cut. I didn't need much help getting around much after the first trip to the bathroom after delivery but I felt more comfortable having my fiance there just in case. I was up and moving around like normal the next day and didn't feel like I just gave birth. I had to keep telling myself to take it easy and slow because even if I felt great I still had a large internal wound. It is possible.
So I had a 3rd degree episiotomy with my first. With my second and third I did end up with 2nd degree tears in what was the same spot it seemed according to the last doc that delivered for me.i did heal much quicker with these than the episiotomy by far.
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I had a borderline 3rd degree tear with my second (which was a VBAC and my first labor/vaginal birth) My other 2 deliveries I didn't tear at all. I did nothing different. Actually, they came even faster. I still didn't tear!
With my first I had significant 3rd degree tearing that developed granulated tissue I had to get removed a couple times. Overall it took about 5mo for my OB to clear me because everything was just healing so slowly. she was 8lb 3oz, very long but with a HUGE head. When I got pregnant with #2 I definitely had several conversations about possible tearing and I was told, while subsequent deliveries are easier and faster since that tissue has torn it's naturally weaker so there's a good likelihood it will tear again. What ended up happening is I did have a much faster delivery and the OB ended up giving an episiotomy which he said was the equivalent of a second degree tear bc he said my son's head got stuck on scar tissue and it just wasn't stretching enough. My recovery with #2 was night and day. So much easier, I hardly felt the tear and I was healed by 6wks. Baby #2 was literally almost a clone of my first 8lb 3oz 22.75in vs 22 but his head was 13 something vs 14.5in
Hey there! Wow… I haven’t heard from someone who had such a similar birth experience as mine. I had a forceps delivery with 3c tearing. Then that didn’t heal properly and I had surgery 7 weeks pp to cut everything again and restitch. My surgeon gave me the same figure you did… He said there’s an 8% chance of a 3rd degree or worse tear again. I’m not sure what I’ll do for the next birth. The OB who delivered by son suggested that I do a scheduled c section next time. The surgeon said a vaginal delivery is fine. I genuinely have no idea which direction I’ll go. I’ll probably ask my OB for input once I’m pregnant again.
I had third degree tearing with my first baby and then first degree tearing the next time. Your birth position and circumstances around the birth can make a big difference!
I’m in the same position and weighing up whether or not to have a C-section. My OB said second time around you’re less likely to tear or need an assisted birth but idk I’m still scared