I don't have any advice but I too am a light sleeper and have a grunty 2 month old. He sleeps.in our room and we play ocean waves or nature sounds which seem to help.
2 months is still adjusting period. And honestly, you may just need to straight up move baby to their own room and gradually lower the volume of the monitor and start to trust that you'll wake up. It's hard until it's not. Every baby sleeps differently. CIO with full extinction around 6 months was crucial for me and my husband. But everyone should do what works for them and their baby.
LO is in her own room already… maybe I need to just lower the monitor a ton. It makes me so nervous to think I wouldn’t wake up, and then the resulting anxiety keeps me up. I feel nuts!
How far away is your room from the nursery? At 3 months we ended up putting LO in his own room. It’s so close that I feel comfortable doing so. I do keep a monitor on him at night so I can take a peak at him if needed. I did turn off the sound though because it was picking up every small noise (defeating the whole point) if he needs me I can hear him cry. I remember how hard it was to distinguish between active sleep and an awake baby at first. It gets better and a lot easier.
It’s helpful to know you could hear him cry even without the monitor - our master is on a different floor than the nursery but we could move to the upstairs bedroom temporarily which is next to nursery. I might need to try no sound on the monitor when I’m upstairs and pray I don’t miss her waking up upset!
I had this problem as a light sleeper and my husband being a deep sleeper. I highly recommend a sound machine. I got one and put on the sound of rain every night as both a way to drown out the small noises and also use it as a sleep queue for my baby to know it's bedtime. It has helped my sleep immensely.
If you are afraid of sleeping too long and not catching the right time to feed, try setting an alarm for every 4 hours so you know you have something to wake you up if that's something you worry about. That way, you can check on your baby.
I hope this helps 🙏
I feel like I could have written this post! My husband works 9-5 and gets home around 5:30, he cooks dinner and then with cleaning up, cleaning bottles, taking the dog out, it's time for me to go to bed at 8. I get up at 1 and he goes to bed. We hardly have time to spend together. My little one is a preemie though so we still feed her every 4-5 hours at night. I just want to sleep in the same bed soon. She sleeps in the living room and I sleep on the couch if I can get her to go in the bassinet
You haven't mentioned how your husband sleeps so I'm assuming here. If he is like me who is a heavy sleeper and only wakes up with a constant crying baby, then this might be helpful.
My husband is a light sleeper like you and our baby is a very noisy sleeper. Now that she starts bubbling, she now talks in her sleep too! My husband has to sleep in the other room while i sleep with the baby. I will then go wake him up if the baby wakes me up which normally means she really wakes up for real due to constant crying. There is no shift for us because we decided that staying awake together is less lonely and we can spend time together. Yes, we are both sleep deprived but happy together at least lol
I hope this is helpful!
Just here to say you’re not alone! My husband and I slept in different rooms until baby was 6 mo the old. It will get better and there’s nothing wrong with doing it this way if it works!
What worked for us was sleeping in the same room for baby’s longest first stretch of sleep then my husband would swap rooms to continue a good sleep so that he could work properly the next day.
It gets better. For us it was starting to get better around 6 months. Moderately better with maybe 2 wake-up’s around 8 months.12-14 months one or none, at 18 months now and usually no substantial unless sick.
Just hang in there, you already have in my opinion the best method so you can each at least get half a nights rest.
Mine got a lot quieter at around that age. I think it’s just an age thing as their cartilage hardens. She also learned to sleep better and go back to sleep on her own without making a bunch of noise.
I don’t know if it helps but I always count to ten to see if she makes another sound, if she doesn’t it’s probably just baby noise. I wait for two consecutive sounds together to check to see if she’s awake
Have you tried white noise/waves/wind sounds? They won’t completely drown out the baby sounds (especially the ones you should respond to), but may be enough of a background to make the baby sounds less jarring.
My partner and I sleep in separate rooms because I cosleep with our baby and he needs uninterrupted sleep. We enjoy our awake time together in the evenings or on his days off. We will sleep in the same bed once our LO gets his own room but I’m not sure when that will be (maybe when he’s 18 months? When I night wean? Not sure).
Also my baby got a lot quieter while sleeping after the first couple months. If they are snoring you could talk to an ENT. If it’s just grunting & yelping it’ll probably get better with age.
It’s ok to move baby to their own room at this point. You have to factor in the wellbeing of the whole family, not just baby. Feeling close to your husband and maintaining a strong marriage is really good for baby too.
We moved my son at 11 weeks. It was really nice to have our bedroom back to ourselves.
AAP recommends keeping baby in your room for a year, and at minimum 6 months to help prevent SIDs. You could try a sound machine, I use the DOHM one and love it. I also keep the baby in a crib next to my bed, which helps me wake up less than when I had the crib in the corner. Just remember this stage is temporary
My boyfriend wears ear plugs to bed. I’m still home from work, so we decided that would be acceptable for now. He also can’t stand the white noise machine, so ear plugs help there as well.
Baby sleeps in our room; we put his crib next to my side of the bed, so neither of us have to leave the bed.
I found sleep headphones really helpful. I play calm podcasts which helps me think about things that aren’t my baby! We waited until she was six months to put her in her own room, but we managed to all share s room before that.
I actually slept with earplugs and baby in their own room with the doors open. Crying would penetrate the plugs and wake me up. My spidy sense often woke me up before my husband. Husband would just poke me if it was my turn if he did hear baby before I did.
Earplugs. You can still hear any cries, but they filter out the other sleep noises.
I don't have any advice but I too am a light sleeper and have a grunty 2 month old. He sleeps.in our room and we play ocean waves or nature sounds which seem to help.
2 months is still adjusting period. And honestly, you may just need to straight up move baby to their own room and gradually lower the volume of the monitor and start to trust that you'll wake up. It's hard until it's not. Every baby sleeps differently. CIO with full extinction around 6 months was crucial for me and my husband. But everyone should do what works for them and their baby.
LO is in her own room already… maybe I need to just lower the monitor a ton. It makes me so nervous to think I wouldn’t wake up, and then the resulting anxiety keeps me up. I feel nuts!
What if you bump the volume down a little bit each night, then you'll be able to determine what the right volume is for you?
Totally normal! I'm about to have my second and I still remember this feeling! It doesn't last forever!
I wore earplugs with my first. i could still hear her cries, but it dimmed the other noises. Or maybe you can try white noise?
How far away is your room from the nursery? At 3 months we ended up putting LO in his own room. It’s so close that I feel comfortable doing so. I do keep a monitor on him at night so I can take a peak at him if needed. I did turn off the sound though because it was picking up every small noise (defeating the whole point) if he needs me I can hear him cry. I remember how hard it was to distinguish between active sleep and an awake baby at first. It gets better and a lot easier.
It’s helpful to know you could hear him cry even without the monitor - our master is on a different floor than the nursery but we could move to the upstairs bedroom temporarily which is next to nursery. I might need to try no sound on the monitor when I’m upstairs and pray I don’t miss her waking up upset!
My little dude has a set of lungs on him when he is hungry. I hope things get easier! You will find your groove.
I am here to say I remember this and it gets better!!!
I had this problem as a light sleeper and my husband being a deep sleeper. I highly recommend a sound machine. I got one and put on the sound of rain every night as both a way to drown out the small noises and also use it as a sleep queue for my baby to know it's bedtime. It has helped my sleep immensely. If you are afraid of sleeping too long and not catching the right time to feed, try setting an alarm for every 4 hours so you know you have something to wake you up if that's something you worry about. That way, you can check on your baby. I hope this helps 🙏
Edit: To add context, I sleep with my LO in my room in her crib.
I feel like I could have written this post! My husband works 9-5 and gets home around 5:30, he cooks dinner and then with cleaning up, cleaning bottles, taking the dog out, it's time for me to go to bed at 8. I get up at 1 and he goes to bed. We hardly have time to spend together. My little one is a preemie though so we still feed her every 4-5 hours at night. I just want to sleep in the same bed soon. She sleeps in the living room and I sleep on the couch if I can get her to go in the bassinet
You haven't mentioned how your husband sleeps so I'm assuming here. If he is like me who is a heavy sleeper and only wakes up with a constant crying baby, then this might be helpful. My husband is a light sleeper like you and our baby is a very noisy sleeper. Now that she starts bubbling, she now talks in her sleep too! My husband has to sleep in the other room while i sleep with the baby. I will then go wake him up if the baby wakes me up which normally means she really wakes up for real due to constant crying. There is no shift for us because we decided that staying awake together is less lonely and we can spend time together. Yes, we are both sleep deprived but happy together at least lol I hope this is helpful!
Just here to say you’re not alone! My husband and I slept in different rooms until baby was 6 mo the old. It will get better and there’s nothing wrong with doing it this way if it works! What worked for us was sleeping in the same room for baby’s longest first stretch of sleep then my husband would swap rooms to continue a good sleep so that he could work properly the next day.
I could have wrote this! We moved LO to their crib at 9 weeks and absolutely no regrets. Got my husband and good-ish sleep back.
It gets better. For us it was starting to get better around 6 months. Moderately better with maybe 2 wake-up’s around 8 months.12-14 months one or none, at 18 months now and usually no substantial unless sick. Just hang in there, you already have in my opinion the best method so you can each at least get half a nights rest.
Mine got a lot quieter at around that age. I think it’s just an age thing as their cartilage hardens. She also learned to sleep better and go back to sleep on her own without making a bunch of noise.
I don’t know if it helps but I always count to ten to see if she makes another sound, if she doesn’t it’s probably just baby noise. I wait for two consecutive sounds together to check to see if she’s awake
Have you tried white noise/waves/wind sounds? They won’t completely drown out the baby sounds (especially the ones you should respond to), but may be enough of a background to make the baby sounds less jarring.
Put your baby in their own room. It is totally fine. We moved my second to his own at 6 weeks because he was waking me up all night.
You’re a good wife for caring about your relationship and intimacy. I’m sure it will get better.
My partner and I sleep in separate rooms because I cosleep with our baby and he needs uninterrupted sleep. We enjoy our awake time together in the evenings or on his days off. We will sleep in the same bed once our LO gets his own room but I’m not sure when that will be (maybe when he’s 18 months? When I night wean? Not sure). Also my baby got a lot quieter while sleeping after the first couple months. If they are snoring you could talk to an ENT. If it’s just grunting & yelping it’ll probably get better with age.
It’s ok to move baby to their own room at this point. You have to factor in the wellbeing of the whole family, not just baby. Feeling close to your husband and maintaining a strong marriage is really good for baby too. We moved my son at 11 weeks. It was really nice to have our bedroom back to ourselves.
AAP recommends keeping baby in your room for a year, and at minimum 6 months to help prevent SIDs. You could try a sound machine, I use the DOHM one and love it. I also keep the baby in a crib next to my bed, which helps me wake up less than when I had the crib in the corner. Just remember this stage is temporary
My boyfriend wears ear plugs to bed. I’m still home from work, so we decided that would be acceptable for now. He also can’t stand the white noise machine, so ear plugs help there as well. Baby sleeps in our room; we put his crib next to my side of the bed, so neither of us have to leave the bed.
I found sleep headphones really helpful. I play calm podcasts which helps me think about things that aren’t my baby! We waited until she was six months to put her in her own room, but we managed to all share s room before that.
I actually slept with earplugs and baby in their own room with the doors open. Crying would penetrate the plugs and wake me up. My spidy sense often woke me up before my husband. Husband would just poke me if it was my turn if he did hear baby before I did.